whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Apr 13, 2016 8:55:18 GMT -5
I was waiting for my kids at a barber shop and chit chatting with another mom who was also waiting. She told me she quit working 3 yrs ago after her second kid was born and that she used to work in X hospital. So, I said "oh, you were you a nurse? My hat is off to you - such demanding job". She looks at me and says "well, I still am"
I pause for a second thinking that I must have not been listening very well bc I thought I heard her say that she quit working. She must have seen my confusion bc she says "You said "were", but I am still a nurse, I just don't work anymore"
I didn't say anything after that. But that got me thinking - do people define themselves as whatever profession they had even if they are no longer doing it?
After I stopped working I never said "I am an accountant". I would say "I don't work" or "I stay home with the kids".
Is it ego? Is it pride? Are people really tied to what they do for a living? Did I offend this lady?
How do you describe yourself in that sense? What is your experience with others?
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Apr 13, 2016 8:57:59 GMT -5
LOL, it sounds like she gets a lot of shit for being a SAHM so now she says she is a nurse.
You definitely offended her! Even on my year off, I just said "I'm taking a year off". I don't admit my profession to random people unless I have to!
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Apr 13, 2016 9:02:14 GMT -5
LOL, it sounds like she gets a lot of shit for being a SAHM so now she says she is a nurse.
You definitely offended her! Even on my year off, I just said "I'm taking a year off". I don't admit my profession to random people unless I have to!
Well......she wouldn't be the first one..... At least I didn't ask her if her 3 yr old was was a boy or a girl. The child was dressed in bright pink leggins and bright purple shirt. Turned out it was a boy and his name was the same as one of my kids. I thanked G-d that my kids didn't ask him why he looked liked a girl and had a boy's name.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Apr 13, 2016 9:13:50 GMT -5
One story that makes me laugh still is when I took DD to the dealership with me last summer, she was 2. There was a very manly looking guy with a ponytail working on a car in a bay sort of far from us. She yelled at the top of her lungs, "Mommy look at that man's pretty pony! Look mommy Look". LOL, I was so glad she knew he was a man and called the ponytail pretty.
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hoops902
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Post by hoops902 on Apr 13, 2016 9:21:35 GMT -5
LOL, it sounds like she gets a lot of shit for being a SAHM so now she says she is a nurse.
You definitely offended her! Even on my year off, I just said "I'm taking a year off". I don't admit my profession to random people unless I have to!
Except it sounds like she was pretty up-front about the fact she's a SAHM.
I'll start by saying I'm not sure what kind of professional designations nurses have, and if they still have it when they aren't working.
It could simply be a case where technically she still IS a nurse. For example, if I were a medical doctor, I would continue being a medical doctor even if I weren't working (I think). So I could tell you I'm not working, but that I used to do X. If you said "Oh you used to be a doctor", I'd probably correct you that I actually am still a medical doctor...not because I'm tied to that as a thing...just because it's not technically accurate to say I used to be a doctor.
I think that only works for some things...you can't say "I'm still a cashier, I just don't work"...because the only thing that makes you a cashier is actually being employed as a cashier. Lots of jobs/distinctions aren't actually tied to you being employed as "that thing" though. Some things you achieve and then they just stick with you...like if you graduate HS you didn't "used to be a high school graduate"...you still are. If I correct someone, it's not necessarily because I'm offended, but because what they said is weird and not accurate (and I think for those who have those designations, it sounds weird).
Again, I don't know how nurses work and whether you remain being a nurse or if there are requirements to be actively employed to retain whatever it is you need to be a nurse.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Apr 13, 2016 9:27:33 GMT -5
But that got me thinking - do people define themselves as whatever profession they had even if they are no longer doing it?
Absolutely. Just because you do not actually do the work right now does not mean that you don't have the credentials to pick it back up. I still see myself as a scientist, and likely will be until the end of my days. Whether or not that changes if I actually manage to get a job in drafting, I don't know. But it doesn't ameliorate the fact that my degree and experience backs me up being a scientist, just like her education and experience backs her up for being a nurse.
Because she is not doing it NOW doesn't mean a damn thing.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2016 9:29:22 GMT -5
She might just have meant that she still maintains her license and could start up again at the drop of a hat if need be.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Apr 13, 2016 9:29:35 GMT -5
I was waiting for my kids at a barber shop and chit chatting with another mom who was also waiting. She told me she quit working 3 yrs ago after her second kid was born and that she used to work in X hospital. So, I said "oh, you were you a nurse? My hat is off to you - such demanding job". She looks at me and says "well, I still am" I pause for a second thinking that I must have not been listening very well bc I thought I heard her say that she quit working. She must have seen my confusion bc she says "You said "were", but I am still a nurse, I just don't work anymore" I didn't say anything after that. But that got me thinking - do people define themselves as whatever profession they had even if they are no longer doing it? After I stopped working I never said "I am an accountant". I would say "I don't work" or "I stay home with the kids". Is it ego? Is it pride? Are people really tied to what they do for a living? Did I offend this lady? How do you describe yourself in that sense? What is your experience with others? I wonder if Nurses have Continuing Education Requirements? Do they have to work a certain number of hours to continue to be licensed? Is it possible she works weekends or as a floater occasionally to stay current? I wouldn't want to invest all that time in becoming an RN and then lose my ability to use my career if need be. I know a few nurses and very few give it up - I think it is on the order of a calling.
I did work with a woman many years ago that told me she was a nurse and she gave someone the wrong drug in an IV (I think the person died). She said she gave up Nursing and went into accounting after that - she said she found it so much less stressful b/c your mistakes can always be corrected.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2016 9:33:11 GMT -5
I describe myself as a retired actuary. Technically, I've still got the credentials but I can't sign off on reserves on an insurer's balance sheet because I haven't kept up with continuing education requirements.
In your example, I'd say she was certainly a nurse by training, and would probably run to the aid of someone who needed medical attention, so maybe she still is a nurse even if she's not employed as one.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Apr 13, 2016 9:33:43 GMT -5
Ok, I am in the minority. Not surprising.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Apr 13, 2016 9:44:21 GMT -5
Ok, I am in the minority. Not surprising. That's OK, according to some recent threads we are just as important as the majority
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Apr 13, 2016 9:54:41 GMT -5
LOL, it sounds like she gets a lot of shit for being a SAHM so now she says she is a nurse.
You definitely offended her! Even on my year off, I just said "I'm taking a year off". I don't admit my profession to random people unless I have to!
Except it sounds like she was pretty up-front about the fact she's a SAHM.
I'll start by saying I'm not sure what kind of professional designations nurses have, and if they still have it when they aren't working.
It could simply be a case where technically she still IS a nurse. For example, if I were a medical doctor, I would continue being a medical doctor even if I weren't working (I think). So I could tell you I'm not working, but that I used to do X. If you said "Oh you used to be a doctor", I'd probably correct you that I actually am still a medical doctor...not because I'm tied to that as a thing...just because it's not technically accurate to say I used to be a doctor.
I think that only works for some things...you can't say "I'm still a cashier, I just don't work"...because the only thing that makes you a cashier is actually being employed as a cashier. Lots of jobs/distinctions aren't actually tied to you being employed as "that thing" though. Some things you achieve and then they just stick with you...like if you graduate HS you didn't "used to be a high school graduate"...you still are. If I correct someone, it's not necessarily because I'm offended, but because what they said is weird and not accurate (and I think for those who have those designations, it sounds weird).
Again, I don't know how nurses work and whether you remain being a nurse or if there are requirements to be actively employed to retain whatever it is you need to be a nurse.
You have an interesting point. A friend of mine who used to be a nurse and now doing something completely different doesn't say she is a nurse, though. Same with a friend what is/was CPA. To me, once you are not actively doing a job, I can't see how you can say you are still "x" You can say "I used to be x" or "I was trained as x" But if you tell me you are a CPA and I want you to do my taxes and take care of my business and then I find out that you haven't been practicing for 15 yrs - yeah, I'll probably sue you. So just bc you passed the exam and had a license - does it make you that for life? Now, if you have been taking continuing education classes and are up on everything - that might be different. Otherwise, I don't see it
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Apr 13, 2016 9:56:07 GMT -5
I still consider myself an insurance person even though I'm now in IT. It's what I've always done. I'm still in the insurance industry, just in a different position.
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hoops902
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Post by hoops902 on Apr 13, 2016 10:00:50 GMT -5
Some things make you something "for life", some things you have to continue doing some requirement to maintain the status, and some things are simply self-appointed (for example, "I'm a poet" is kind of a self-assigned label). "I'm a HS graduate", you just are for life. I'm not sure what nurses need to continue being nurses. Not everything requires continuing education classes.
I'm not sure what kind of ongoing requirements nurses have.
I also think there's a pretty big difference between someone saying "I'm a CPA, let me do your taxes", and someone who has already clearly said they no longer work as a nurse, but corrects you in saying they technically still are a nurse (I don't know if they really still are a nurse based on requirements, just pointing out there's clearly no deception there to convince you they're still an actively practicing nurse).
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Apr 13, 2016 10:02:43 GMT -5
I guess I'm in the minority, too.
If I quit tomorrow to stay home with my kids and someone asked me what I did, I'd say "I am a stay at home mom."
If I said "I'm a nurse," then they would probably ask "Oh, what hospital do you work at?" blah blah blah. But I don't currently work as a nurse, I currently work as a stay at home mom, no matter what my credentials are or what continuing education classes/certifications I am currently doing.
A more appropriate answer would have been "I stay home with the kids right now, but I was a nurse and plan on going back to work once my son starts kindergarten."
I currently AM a corporate writer, but if I quit tomorrow, then next week I would have to describe myself as I WAS a corporate writer.
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hoops902
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Post by hoops902 on Apr 13, 2016 10:06:59 GMT -5
I guess I'm in the minority, too.
If I quit tomorrow to stay home with my kids and someone asked me what I did, I'd say "I am a stay at home mom."
If I said "I'm a nurse," then they would probably ask "Oh, what hospital do you work at?" blah blah blah. But I don't currently work as a nurse, I currently work as a stay at home mom, no matter what my credentials are or what continuing education classes/certifications I am currently doing.
A more appropriate answer would have been "I stay home with the kids right now, but I was a nurse and plan on going back to work once my son starts kindergarten."
I currently AM a corporate writer, but if I quit tomorrow, then next week I would have to describe myself as I WAS a corporate writer. This woman basically did say what you would say though. She said she quit working to stay at home with her kid. She only corrected the "used to be a nurse" comment, and seemed to provide explanation around the fact she no longer works as a nurse, but technically still is one.
I do think it would have been weird if the conversation went "What do you do?" "I'm a nurse".
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Apr 13, 2016 10:13:08 GMT -5
Well it goes back to the original question. Why was it so important for her to clarify?
If it was me, I would have just let it go, even if I thought of myself as "technically" still a nurse. Maybe it would have been helpful for her to say "I'm still a nurse because I've kept current with x reqs". Again, most people probably don't care, but if it is so important to you to say "I am a nurse", instead of "I was a nurse" maybe an explanation is in order especially when the person you are talking to gives a confused look.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2016 10:22:10 GMT -5
I do think there are some credentials that don't go away just because you're not working a job. If she's doing the required CE hours to keep the license she still has the right to put RN after her name (unless she's an LPN of course ) My cousin is a nurse and not working right now. She loses/quits jobs all the time and goes for months, sometimes years without working, but she's still a nurse.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Apr 13, 2016 10:26:47 GMT -5
If she's keeping her license current then she can still call herself a nurse.
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Apr 13, 2016 10:26:52 GMT -5
If this woman has kept up on all the continuing education/credentialing/licensing requirements than it is completely fair to maintain that she is a nurse, even if she is not currently employed as one. And believe it or not, it is actually a very important distinction. While medical emergencies in public do not happen very often, what she can legally do/is expected to legally do is different if she has maintained her nursing license vs if she hasn't.
The comment about being a CPA is kind of the same thing. If someone has maintained their CPA license, they are still a CPA, even if they aren't working as one professionally, and maintaining that license places them under different legal and ethical standards in certain situations.
The same goes for lawyers, doctors, and other professionals who have to maintain professional licenses. If they maintain those licenses, even if they are not employed doing that work, they are still a lawyer/doctor/mental health counselor, etc, and they still have the legal and ethical requirements of their license.
At the same time, yes, people can be that caught up in their careers as a definition of who they are. I spent 9 months unemployed. I still told people I was an Administrator/Business Manager. Because that is what I do, even if I was not doing it at that time. But, I am also one of those people who knows that my identity and self-worth are probably a little more caught up in my profession than is completely healthy.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Apr 13, 2016 10:50:10 GMT -5
If she's keeping her license current then she can still call herself a nurse. And she might have. I kept up with all my continuing education/certifications/licenses for years when I was home with the kids. I figured it would be easier and quicker to get a job that way if I ever wanted to.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 13, 2016 10:54:29 GMT -5
She might just have meant that she still maintains her license and could start up again at the drop of a hat if need be. That's what I was thinking. She's still doing whatever she needs to to keep her license active.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Apr 13, 2016 14:10:29 GMT -5
I have a cousin who subs as a school nurse enough to keep her license. She hasn't worked full time in ages. Not sure what the hours requirement is in my state because the other one I know if my mom who works full time.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Apr 13, 2016 14:19:58 GMT -5
I spent a lot of time in the role of nurse while my children were growing. All of us can lay claim to being a nurse in some way.
I agree. She probably kept her nursing certification.
My former profession was office work. I do plenty of the same tasks at home as well as home economics. Life is full of a lot of cross over skills.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2016 14:21:33 GMT -5
I have a cousin who subs as a school nurse enough to keep her license. She hasn't worked full time in ages. Not sure what the hours requirement is in my state because the other one I know if my mom who works full time. In MN you don't have to have working hours to renew your license. You just have to have all the required CE hours in. They encourage you to keep your license current during stretches when you might not be working because re-registration after it expires is a lot more involved than just renewing every two years.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Apr 13, 2016 14:23:47 GMT -5
You guys are getting all bugged down with this particular woman and the whole licensing, credentials things
I just find it interesting that people seem to try to hold on to their "work" identities. It seems most of you would still identify yourself with your profession even after you retired, changed fields or stopped working for whatever reason.
And I am very curious as to why that is.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2016 14:27:05 GMT -5
You guys are getting all bugged down with this particular woman and the whole licensing, credentials things I just find it interesting that people seem to try to hold on to their "work" identities. It seems most of you would still identify yourself with your profession even after you retired, changed fields or stopped working for whatever reason. And I am very curious as to why that is. LOL I hate saying I'm a Quality Technician NOW. I sure won't be bringing it up after I get out of here. I don't identify with this job at all.
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Waffle
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Post by Waffle on Apr 13, 2016 14:29:06 GMT -5
I suspect that the people who identify with their professions are the ones who either enjoy what they do and/or think it's in some way impressive. I don't think I identify with my profession as much as I identify with my hobby. I rarely volunteer what I do for a living - don't particularly want to talk about it - but I could go on forever about buying and selling used junk.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Apr 13, 2016 14:33:44 GMT -5
NPL. How can you say you aren't in quality control at home? How do you choose your chicken feed? Those chickens are nice looking. Quality.
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Apr 13, 2016 14:35:23 GMT -5
Will you still be a Mom after your kids are grown and moved out of the house?
As I said before, I am aware that my identity and self-worth are perhaps a little too tied to what I do for a living, but, like it or not, about 1/3 of my life is spent as my work identity. On a week day, I leave my house at 6:30am and don't get back until 5pm - so that's 10.5 hours of a day when I am up 17 hours -so over half of my waking day on weekdays. And those are just the hours when I'm "at work". Because I work in higher education and for a very respected department (our field is not super well known, but if you know our field, you know my department), I get asked a lot of questions about my work and my department even when I am not at work. Considering that I am at home during hours that my daughter and I are both awake less than 50 hours a week, I actually spend more of my time actively doing my job than I do being a mom. But once Pop Tart graduates high school and moves out, no one will think I should say "I used to be a mom".
But again, in the case of people who work in certain professions, licensing matters. If they are currently licensed, they are "that" even if they aren't employed doing it. Because the license is what matters on both the legal and ethical front.
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