NomoreDramaQ1015
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:26:32 GMT -5
Posts: 48,101
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Nov 10, 2015 16:53:51 GMT -5
A real will is a good idea. Loony's mom is good example of how verbal promises don't me jack squat. So yeah probably a good idea to make sure if he's serious it's put down on paper and make sure she actually inherits it. It isn't a wife who is still living somewhere he never divorced.
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NastyWoman
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 20:50:37 GMT -5
Posts: 14,886
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Post by NastyWoman on Nov 10, 2015 22:31:17 GMT -5
OK, Yoda.
Or I can get ahead of this. Again, I'm not going in with a shotgun, i just really want to understand and try to help her find a solutions she's happy with, but that is the most logical choice. If she really doesn't want to marry him, I'm totally fine with it, and she doesn't even have to say why (though I bet she will).
I just want her taken care of and also to have the least burden on me, frankly.
So you think your mom is a burden? Please tell me you aren't an only child and she has another child to help her when she's older just like she took care of them for years growing up. Wow. ETA : What makes you think that she's not happy with her life now? Don't you think she would've married him by now if that's what she wanted? In post #14 I fessed up to being 64 and my kids knowing better than to pressure me into marrying. But I must stand up for alwaysbeoptimizing. Not once in all his posts in this thread have I ever seen anything but respect and love for his mom. Just because he is trying to look out for his mom's future, while also keep his own nuclear family at the forefront, does not mean that he is either money grabbing or uncaring. JMO
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HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Nov 11, 2015 11:06:16 GMT -5
Hey, don't get too stressed out about this, she may outlive you This is for the OP!!!! if work keeps up, she will.
i put on 30lbs in the last 12 months...
Someone needs to pick up jogging as a hobby!
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andi9899
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 6, 2011 10:22:29 GMT -5
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Post by andi9899 on Nov 11, 2015 14:35:00 GMT -5
Someone needs to pick up jogging as a hobby! yeah, some of it is fun (beer) and some of it is just stress eating/etc.
I think I've decided to address it instead of giving up on life, so will work on that. I've started baby steps of drinking less and eating a little better, but need to get to a full regime
No hate here. I have the same problem. But I just love beer!
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HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Nov 11, 2015 16:58:35 GMT -5
I run so I can drink beer!
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Post by mojothehelpermonkey on Nov 11, 2015 17:38:45 GMT -5
Either help her or don't. The decision is yours. OK, Yoda.
Or I can get ahead of this. Again, I'm not going in with a shotgun, i just really want to understand and try to help her find a solutions she's happy with, but that is the most logical choice. If she really doesn't want to marry him, I'm totally fine with it, and she doesn't even have to say why (though I bet she will).
I just want her taken care of and also to have the least burden on me, frankly.
I get where you are coming from here. I was the grandchild in a situation where one set of grandparents had a combination of bad luck, poor choices, and health problems that made home life pretty chaotic. I would suggest that you try to have an in depth discussion with your mom about why she doesn't want to marry him and what her plans are for the future. In most other cases, I would say MYOB, but she is your mom. Your are not entitled to detailed answers, but you can at least ask.
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Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Nov 11, 2015 22:39:10 GMT -5
Zib and Tloon...it doesn't rhyme. Zib is opinionated, you are almost crazy...but in a fun and good way. You know that. Does POM and ZIB rhymes? Because it seems like they 2 related? And both are very similar in their 'character' LMAO!! I know, right? Unless you meant we're crazy. That would be Zib because she's a gun owner and all. I'm just dumb. You know - because you're always so easy to understand and stuff and I'm not comprehending. <<runs before Zib shows up and puts a cap in my ass>> ETA: Oops. We're back on topic? I thought nobody over here ever wanted to take care of their parents no matter how awesome they were/are. No? That changed too? Shit. I can't keep up!
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finnime
Junior Associate
Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
Joined: Dec 23, 2010 7:14:35 GMT -5
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Post by finnime on Nov 12, 2015 10:17:09 GMT -5
alwaysbeoptimizing, I understand your concerns, and fwiw think you're being very thoughtful towards your DM. A porch conversation sounds like a great idea - or, alternatively, could you gift your mother with a session with a financial planner? It could be a good holiday gift and provides some privacy for your mother. Then, after that is done you might discuss with her what she is planning on and how you might help.
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