zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 18, 2014 9:12:52 GMT -5
But guys always think they deserve 10s even if they are 2s!
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 18, 2014 11:39:34 GMT -5
Meh, men are a lot of work. I quit dating. The last guy tried to be very controlling. The one before him, I was finding myself wishing I was home mowing the lawn when we were together. I dont want to take care of a new old guy! Maybe I was looking in the wrong places, but the guys I met seemed to think that, because I am older, I should be grateful they were paying attention to me and they wanted to be taken care of and pampered. I don't want to be pestered for sex all the time. I don't want to cook and do laundry for someone else. I don't want to be a nurse with a purse. How old are you and how old were they?
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achelois
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Post by achelois on Jul 18, 2014 13:02:40 GMT -5
I am 62 now. They were within a couple years of my age. Why?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2014 13:06:44 GMT -5
Meh, men are a lot of work. I quit dating. The last guy tried to be very controlling. The one before him, I was finding myself wishing I was home mowing the lawn when we were together. I dont want to take care of a new old guy! Maybe I was looking in the wrong places, but the guys I met seemed to think that, because I am older, I should be grateful they were paying attention to me and they wanted to be taken care of and pampered. I don't want to be pestered for sex all the time. I don't want to cook and do laundry for someone else. I don't want to be a nurse with a purse. I definitely agree that men are a lot of work. I had a short period of dealing with younger men. OMG, the whining..... why didn't you answer your phone?why didn't you call me?why?why?why? I have to disagree about being pestered for sex. IF I like and enjoy him and that's the kind of relationship we have, I'm game. Don't tell anybody I said that.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2014 13:12:10 GMT -5
I like the younger guys better
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2014 13:14:23 GMT -5
I thought I would too. I must've run into all the wrong ones.
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emma1420
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Post by emma1420 on Jul 18, 2014 15:00:51 GMT -5
But guys always think they deserve 10s even if they are 2s! Yep. I think men, in general, are far pickier than women are.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 18, 2014 15:36:47 GMT -5
I am 62 now. They were within a couple years of my age. Why? Just wondering if the attitude was because of your age or theirs.
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nutty
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Post by nutty on Jul 18, 2014 15:55:37 GMT -5
Older men are a lot pickier (even with sex) than I actually think women are. I think older women ( and I am going to say maybe older than 35) can and will do casual sex as it is not as taboo as it may be for younger women.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 18, 2014 16:39:55 GMT -5
Older men are a lot pickier (even with sex) than I actually think women are. I think older women ( and I am going to say maybe older than 35) can and will do casual sex as it is not as taboo as it may be for younger women. I think younger women are more likely to have one night stands or sex with someone they just met. Older women are more likely to be able to have "friends with benefits" without getting emotionally attached, but they aren't into one night stands or sex with random guys. Just my observations, doesn't mean it's true. I think all of it can be considered casual sex though.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Jul 18, 2014 17:09:20 GMT -5
Observations.
Tennis has a lot of people in it. Both men and women. These are usually quality people where you can get to know others without sticking your neck out. No, you are not too old to start. You and DS could take lessons together.
When I was younger, I would tell lonely ladies to go into the mountains and hang out. A man will come along.
Look for sports that attract men. Bowling, paintball, archery to name a few.
Do you know what you are looking for--realisitically? Make a list.
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Nazgul Girl
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Post by Nazgul Girl on Jul 18, 2014 17:16:05 GMT -5
Personal Ads
Wanted: Woman with Lobster Boat. Please send picture of Boat.
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nutty
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Post by nutty on Jul 18, 2014 17:22:59 GMT -5
Exactly Pink, that is really what I meant, just didn't it like that but that is what I meant
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 18, 2014 18:42:34 GMT -5
I am notorious for missing signals from women. I wouldn't be dating my current GF now if she hadn't been the aggressor, and invaded my personal space to make up for that fact that I was ignoring the blinking sign over her head that screamed INTERESTED!!!
So, sometimes if you think you're being rejected, it may not be that he isn't interested in you, he may just be completely missing your signals, and you may have to push a little further to get your point across.
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achelois
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Post by achelois on Jul 18, 2014 19:55:32 GMT -5
I am 62 now. They were within a couple years of my age. Why? Just wondering if the attitude was because of your age or theirs. I don't know. Probably both--guys in my age group were raised to be kings of the castle, in a broad generalization, though I realize not everyone fits that mould. I think it is an unconscious thing. One guy, a widower, told me he was sick and tired of having to work and then come home and do housework. His wife had been dead three years. She had been a SAHM. He was the one who came right out and told me he was used to being King of the castle. I have been working and doing all the housework all my life. He didn't last long. A lot of it is just me, though. I don't need a man for money. I can take sex or leave it, especially since menopause. I definitely don't want to take on cooking for or cleaning up after someone--been there, done that most of my life. I don't want anyone telling me what to do or what not to do. I am fine by myself or can go do something with one of my female friends. I cant think of any reason to have a man around. I just can't.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jul 18, 2014 20:18:32 GMT -5
Just wondering if the attitude was because of your age or theirs. I don't know. Probably both--guys in my age group were raised to be kings of the castle, in a broad generalization, though I realize not everyone fits that mould. I think it is an unconscious thing. One guy, a widower, told me he was sick and tired of having to work and then come home and do housework. His wife had been dead three years. She had been a SAHM. He was the one who came right out and told me he was used to being King of the castle. I have been working and doing all the housework all my life. He didn't last long. A lot of it is just me, though. I don't need a man for money. I can take sex or leave it. I definitely don't want to take on cooking for or cleaning up after someone--been there, done that most of my life. I don't want anyone telling me what to do or what not to do. I am fine by myself or can go do something with one of my female friends. I cant think of any reason to have a man around. I just can't. I like having one around for companionship, sex, and perhaps raking the leaves.
But I totally understand attitude mis-match as I often find it myself in those men born in the late 50s versus those born 1960 or later.
The hope is to find a match where you mesh well enough in talents and expectations and can put up with each others foibles.
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Apple
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Post by Apple on Jul 18, 2014 20:37:04 GMT -5
Everyone is pretty much a pile of crap. You just need to find the pile of crap you can deal with.
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nutty
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Post by nutty on Jul 18, 2014 20:45:57 GMT -5
I agree with that too Pink Cashmere, and there ain't nothing wrong with it AT ALL.
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 19, 2014 3:11:12 GMT -5
Just wondering if the attitude was because of your age or theirs. I don't know. Probably both--guys in my age group were raised to be kings of the castle, in a broad generalization, though I realize not everyone fits that mould. I think it is an unconscious thing. One guy, a widower, told me he was sick and tired of having to work and then come home and do housework. His wife had been dead three years. She had been a SAHM. He was the one who came right out and told me he was used to being King of the castle. I have been working and doing all the housework all my life. He didn't last long. A lot of it is just me, though. I don't need a man for money. I can take sex or leave it, especially since menopause. I definitely don't want to take on cooking for or cleaning up after someone--been there, done that most of my life. I don't want anyone telling me what to do or what not to do. I am fine by myself or can go do something with one of my female friends. I cant think of any reason to have a man around. I just can't. If you are comfortable with yourself, then I think you're in the best position to be in a relationship, because you don't NEED a relationship to make yourself feel whole. The idea isn't so much that you need someone, it is more that it is nice if you can find that person who is your best friend who you can share life with. The sex is just a bonus.
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achelois
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Post by achelois on Jul 19, 2014 6:13:19 GMT -5
I don't know. Probably both--guys in my age group were raised to be kings of the castle, in a broad generalization, though I realize not everyone fits that mould. I think it is an unconscious thing. One guy, a widower, told me he was sick and tired of having to work and then come home and do housework. His wife had been dead three years. She had been a SAHM. He was the one who came right out and told me he was used to being King of the castle. I have been working and doing all the housework all my life. He didn't last long. A lot of it is just me, though. I don't need a man for money. I can take sex or leave it, especially since menopause. I definitely don't want to take on cooking for or cleaning up after someone--been there, done that most of my life. I don't want anyone telling me what to do or what not to do. I am fine by myself or can go do something with one of my female friends. I cant think of any reason to have a man around. I just can't. If you are comfortable with yourself, then I think you're in the best position to be in a relationship, because you don't NEED a relationship to make yourself feel whole. The idea isn't so much that you need someone, it is more that it is nice if you can find that person who is your best friend who you can share life with. The sex is just a bonus. I guess that is true for many people, but I am fine not sharing my life with anyone. I just don't feel a need for it. I realize that I am, what?, atypical.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 19, 2014 7:25:51 GMT -5
If by some miracle I outlive DF, I have ZERO intention of getting involved with a man again. No man is living with me or vice versa and I'm sure not going to be a nurse with a purse. Whatever rest of my life I am granted is going to be spent in peace.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Jul 19, 2014 7:44:30 GMT -5
If by some miracle I outlive DF, I have ZERO intention of getting involved with a man again. No man is living with me or vice versa and I'm sure not going to be a nurse with a purse. Whatever rest of my life I am granted is going to be spent in peace. I couldn't have said it better Zib. And in the age group I'm in, which is 70+, most men frankly are just disgusting. Half their teeth are gone, they haven't taken a shower in days, their clothes are ragged and dirty. They also are the neediest of the needy. They are looking for another Mommy to take care of them, and it's not going to be me.
If I survive DH, and I likely will, I'm planning on living the balance of my life in peace and quiet.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 19, 2014 7:51:46 GMT -5
Sigh. Some days when I'm feeling overwhelmed, I dream of those days. Even though I love DF, I'm too old to go through this crap. I've lost two family members who died from being caregivers and a very good friend who remarried after decades of being a widow and 6 months later, he got Alzheimer's and after he died her health was so bad she had to sell her beloved home and move into a nursing home. NOT ME!!!!
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Nazgul Girl
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Post by Nazgul Girl on Jul 19, 2014 8:03:05 GMT -5
Right now, DH & I are an equal team. We are totally able to help each other with everything. When he was sick last year, in pharmacy school, and going through his difficult employment circumstances ( job market/health change ) and when I was going through the overly long process of my divorce, we supported each other emotionally and physically through out the times of crisis. We will look after each other, no matter what. However, if he predeceases me, I will never marry again. I love him too much to ever try to equal him. I wouldn't mind a traditional boyfriend, but I would keep my own residence. I would just want to enjoy my daughter, look after myself and my investments, and get a cat again. I like my own peace and quiet, even while being married, and most potential spouses wouldn't even begin to understand me. And, as Zib so ably stated, I don't want to be a nurse with a purse.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 19, 2014 8:18:29 GMT -5
Older men are a lot pickier (even with sex) than I actually think women are. I think older women ( and I am going to say maybe older than 35) can and will do casual sex as it is not as taboo as it may be for younger women. I think younger women are more likely to have one night stands or sex with someone they just met. Older women are more likely to be able to have "friends with benefits" without getting emotionally attached, but they aren't into one night stands or sex with random guys. Just my observations, doesn't mean it's true. I think all of it can be considered casual sex though.
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t-dog
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Post by t-dog on Jul 19, 2014 10:03:00 GMT -5
Given that I am only 45 and been a widow 5 years I'm not willing to say I'm ready to go it alone for the next 30 years. I do make a good income, spend lots of time with Ds and his sports activities and enjoy watching him play. I volunteer with the sports leagues. Most everyone I know is married. I'm cool that most of life revolves around the 11 year old, but darn it would be nice every now and then to have a night for myself.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jul 19, 2014 10:27:21 GMT -5
Given that I am only 45 and been a widow 5 years I'm not willing to say I'm ready to go it alone for the next 30 years. I do make a good income, spend lots of time with Ds and his sports activities and enjoy watching him play. I volunteer with the sports leagues. Most everyone I know is married. I'm cool that most of life revolves around the 11 year old, but darn it would be nice every now and then to have a night for myself.That will come. This whole thing is new to you so just take it as it comes and don't agonize over it. It's just a shame your first experience was a bust and don't take it personally. But it was probably for the best, maybe? That's the gospel according to NoName for what it's worth
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 19, 2014 15:56:12 GMT -5
I guess that is true for many people, but I am fine not sharing my life with anyone. I just don't feel a need for it. I realize that I am, what?, atypical. I don't think it is a NEED, so much as it is a bonus. I don't NEED to have a girlfriend, because I was perfectly happy being single. I just happened to find someone who fits my personality, is fun to spend time with, and who shares a lot of my interests/philosophies on life. I have a very wide circle of friends, and with her it was just like I added one more to the group, although the depth of our relationship is obviously different from my other friends. Are you completely alone, or do you have pets?
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beergut
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Post by beergut on Jul 19, 2014 16:07:36 GMT -5
I think younger women are more likely to have one night stands or sex with someone they just met. Older women are more likely to be able to have "friends with benefits" without getting emotionally attached, but they aren't into one night stands or sex with random guys. Just my observations, doesn't mean it's true. I think all of it can be considered casual sex though. I have read that because pitocin can be released during sex, especially during orgasm, women actually can have a more difficult time with a FwB arrangement. Pitocin can facilitate bonding, so it makes the women more possessive of their partner, even if it is only just supposed to be an arrangement of convenience. Not a woman, though, so no idea if this is true.
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achelois
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Post by achelois on Jul 19, 2014 16:49:53 GMT -5
I guess that is true for many people, but I am fine not sharing my life with anyone. I just don't feel a need for it. I realize that I am, what?, atypical. I don't think it is a NEED, so much as it is a bonus. I don't NEED to have a girlfriend, because I was perfectly happy being single. I just happened to find someone who fits my personality, is fun to spend time with, and who shares a lot of my interests/philosophies on life. I have a very wide circle of friends, and with her it was just like I added one more to the group, although the depth of our relationship is obviously different from my other friends. Are you completely alone, or do you have pets? I live alone except for my two dachshunds. For me now, it would be more stress than bonus to have someone else in the house. I did not always feel that way. I was married to one husband for 22 years and another for ten, and I have two sons. The dogs are good company. I remember Old Tex also had dachshunds. I do have female friends with whom I go out to eat, etc, from time to time or shopping or whatever. Most recently, we went to a spa. So I wouldn't say I am completely alone as in isolated. But I am very content by myself and don't require much company. A little goes a long way. Today I spent a lot of time working in my yard.
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