Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 12:11:33 GMT -5
People in sales are sick puppies.
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Iggy aka IG
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Post by Iggy aka IG on Apr 3, 2014 12:12:11 GMT -5
People in sales are sick puppies.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 12:14:12 GMT -5
Maybe that's the difference. Iggy and I are in related fields. A coworker over sharing personal information is a problem. A coworker spending the night in a different room, not a problem.
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Iggy aka IG
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Post by Iggy aka IG on Apr 3, 2014 12:17:09 GMT -5
Maybe that's the difference. Iggy and I are in related fields. A coworker over sharing personal information is a problem. A coworker spending the night in a different room, not a problem.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Apr 3, 2014 12:17:38 GMT -5
I don't think you're a prude, at all. I think the young woman who behaved in such a manner at a professional convention is, quite obviously, lacking in professionalism, not to mention decent upbringing. As far as the person who told you about it, I think I'd be pretty upset if someone didn't let me know there was a potential problem of this sort. I don't want it to broadside me when everyone returns! If I know in advance, I can start battening down the hatches before the defecation storm hits! I've never so completely disagreed with you mmhmm. Is this person sharing with everyone what she is doing? Or are people making assumptions? Being sloppy drunk at a work function would bother me--although it happens all the time and doesn't seem to have any impact on work- but this....not even on the radar. It's always a good reminder to me though to know what other people are likely to make assumptions about. Dh and I's lives aren't always conventional and I have remind myself that people looking in have some even stranger ideas of our lives. It's the public drunkenness that worries me the most, raeoflyte. The woman's sexual proclivities should be her own business; however, according to laterbloomer's posts, this was not the case because she didn't keep her dallying private. You seem to be concentrating on that particular behavior rather than on the drunkenness. I'm not. I'm looking at the whole picture and how it serves to present the company that's paying for this person's attendance. While your life may not be conventional, that's your business. If you work for a company that's sending you as a representative to a convention, I expect you'd have more sense than to flout your unconventional lifestyle at that convention. I've read enough from you to make that estimation pretty easily.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 12:26:12 GMT -5
I've never so completely disagreed with you mmhmm. Is this person sharing with everyone what she is doing? Or are people making assumptions? Being sloppy drunk at a work function would bother me--although it happens all the time and doesn't seem to have any impact on work- but this....not even on the radar. It's always a good reminder to me though to know what other people are likely to make assumptions about. Dh and I's lives aren't always conventional and I have remind myself that people looking in have some even stranger ideas of our lives. It's the public drunkenness that worries me the most, raeoflyte. The woman's sexual proclivities should be her own business; however, according to laterbloomer's posts, this was not the case because she didn't keep her dallying private. You seem to be concentrating on that particular behavior rather than on the drunkenness. I'm not. I'm looking at the whole picture and how it serves to present the company that's paying for this person's attendance. While your life may not be conventional, that's your business. If you work for a company that's sending you as a representative to a convention, I expect you'd have more sense than to flout your unconventional lifestyle at that convention. I've read enough from you to make that estimation pretty easily. The focus of this thread has been on her evening activities. The drunkeness was thrown in to support her poor behavior. It's less about what I flaunt and more about what assumptions people make. I've said before that dh shares a room with female coworkers when he goes to out of state conferences. He does it because 1)It's expensive and we're poor/cheap 2)He works in a female dominated industry-- There aren't any men *he knows* to share a room with. My take from this and previous threads is that many people assume he could only share a room with another woman if he's sleeping with them. Who knows what information is being passed up to management because they "need to know".
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 12:53:00 GMT -5
To me the drunkeness last year and the hooking up this year just show an ongoing pattern of poor judgement. This behaviour is being indulged in in front of people she is hoping to manage in the future as well as people she is trying to network with for professional contacts. She not only overshares about these things, she pretty much brags about it.
As far as I am concerned she does not have the maturity or common sense for management. Or to be sent out of town for work related events. BTW this woman is in her mid 30's.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Apr 3, 2014 12:56:11 GMT -5
Maybe that's the difference. Iggy and I are in related fields. A coworker over sharing personal information is a problem. A coworker spending the night in a different room, not a problem. Oh so this. Why can't people keep their mouths shut and therefore not give talking heads something to yammer about!! I could bang the whole 3rd floor and no one would hear it from me. Now if the bangees or is that bangors feel need to talk can't help that. I am the most closed mouth, go to my grave with my personal life so I can't see why others feel need to share everything. But that's just me
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Iggy aka IG
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Post by Iggy aka IG on Apr 3, 2014 13:07:13 GMT -5
Oh so this. Why can't people keep their mouths shut and therefore not give talking heads something to yammer about!! I could bang the whole 3rd floor and no one would hear it from me. Now if the bangees or is that bangors feel need to talk can't help that. I am the most closed mouth, go to my grave with my personal life so I can't see why others feel need to share everything. But that's just me NNP, I am sorry to inform you you didn't get the promotion because you couldn't keep it in your pants.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Apr 3, 2014 13:22:31 GMT -5
Oh so this. Why can't people keep their mouths shut and therefore not give talking heads something to yammer about!! I could bang the whole 3rd floor and no one would hear it from me. Now if the bangees or is that bangors feel need to talk can't help that. I am the most closed mouth, go to my grave with my personal life so I can't see why others feel need to share everything. But that's just me NNP, I am sorry to inform you you didn't get the promotion because you couldn't keep it in your pants. But I did get the promotion. It's called sleeping your way to the top!!!!! In RL I am the CEO of a Fortune 500 company
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Iggy aka IG
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Post by Iggy aka IG on Apr 3, 2014 13:24:19 GMT -5
NNP, I am sorry to inform you you didn't get the promotion because you couldn't keep it in your pants. But I did get the promotion. It's called sleeping your way to the top!!!!! In RL I am the CEO of a Fortune 500 company
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 13:36:23 GMT -5
To me the drunkeness last year and the hooking up this year just show an ongoing pattern of poor judgement. This behaviour is being indulged in in front of people she is hoping to manage in the future as well as people she is trying to network with for professional contacts. She not only overshares about these things, she pretty much brags about it. As far as I am concerned she does not have the maturity or common sense for management. Or to be sent out of town for work related events. BTW this woman is in her mid 30's. Bolded part is an issue and I agree that it indicates immaturity, but even the title of the thread indicates that the objections are more because you object to the behavior. If you are coaching her in annual reviews I would be careful on what you are focusing on. I worked with a small close knit group of people for many years and it gets hard not to over share when you're a talker (like I am). It's an important lesson to learn though.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Apr 3, 2014 13:39:31 GMT -5
It's the public drunkenness that worries me the most, raeoflyte. The woman's sexual proclivities should be her own business; however, according to laterbloomer's posts, this was not the case because she didn't keep her dallying private. You seem to be concentrating on that particular behavior rather than on the drunkenness. I'm not. I'm looking at the whole picture and how it serves to present the company that's paying for this person's attendance. While your life may not be conventional, that's your business. If you work for a company that's sending you as a representative to a convention, I expect you'd have more sense than to flout your unconventional lifestyle at that convention. I've read enough from you to make that estimation pretty easily. The focus of this thread has been on her evening activities. The drunkeness was thrown in to support her poor behavior. It's less about what I flaunt and more about what assumptions people make. I've said before that dh shares a room with female coworkers when he goes to out of state conferences. He does it because 1)It's expensive and we're poor/cheap 2)He works in a female dominated industry-- There aren't any men *he knows* to share a room with. My take from this and previous threads is that many people assume he could only share a room with another woman if he's sleeping with them. Who knows what information is being passed up to management because they "need to know". I didn't get that impression from anything anyone said here, raeoflyte. I've shared a room with a man other than my husband while travelling on business. It was a matter of necessity and we all had a good laugh about it after the fact, including my husband. We were all very good friends and neither the gentleman, nor I, was ever drunk while attending the business conference; nor, did either of us discuss with others what we did when we weren't in their sight. This woman's "evening activities" would have been her business had she chosen to make them so. Instead, she's chosen to make them rather public fodder, it appears.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 13:45:41 GMT -5
In this case raeoflyte the woman had a roommate, which she agreed to before going. There was no way to do this without it being known. Is it that big a deal to behave for 6 days?
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Otto the Orange
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Post by Otto the Orange on Apr 3, 2014 13:47:59 GMT -5
maybe it's true love
won't all you judgmental peeps feel silly when they get married next year?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 13:49:40 GMT -5
maybe it's true love
won't all you judgmental peeps feel silly when they get married next year? Yesterday it was true love. Today he is taking her for granted and by the time they get on the plane Saturday he was using her all along.
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Otto the Orange
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Post by Otto the Orange on Apr 3, 2014 13:53:28 GMT -5
maybe it's true love
won't all you judgmental peeps feel silly when they get married next year? Yesterday it was true love. Today he is taking her for granted and by the time they get on the plane Saturday he was using her all along.
see? it's all his fault......
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 14:31:26 GMT -5
In this case raeoflyte the woman had a roommate, which she agreed to before going. There was no way to do this without it being known. Is it that big a deal to behave for 6 days? I'm cheap so I would agree to share a room with a coworker if I had to for a trip I really wanted to do. But that said, if I could find anyway to not share a room with a coworker--even if that meant crashing on someone else's couch that I felt more comfortable with I'd do it in a heart beat. But if I were single and met someone I clicked with, that wouldn't be available on day 7 since we're only seeing each other during the conference... That just isn't anyone else's business. Maybe we talked until it was late and I didn't want to wake up my roommate so I crashed on his/her couch. Or maybe all the rumors are true. If I'm not making it a big deal, then how on earth does it affect my job performance? Who else is at the conference that is going to know what room I'm sleeping in?
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 14:46:38 GMT -5
Seriously, if there is that much of a connection take each others info and get in touch after you get home. Get together on your own dime.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 14:53:37 GMT -5
Seriously, if there is that much of a connection take each others info and get in touch after you get home. Get together on your own dime. Would you feel the same if it was a platonic same-sex relationship? Haven't seen each other for years and you want to spend your off time catching up? Would the companies cost have been any different if this one person had paid for their own room, leaving one other person in a single room? I just don't get it, and we can agree to disagree. I'm just curious.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Apr 3, 2014 15:49:00 GMT -5
What this woman does once training is over for the day is nobody's business but her own. Where she fails though is in the areas of discretion and class. She has neither. Humans, being human, will talk about her behavior at company paid events. Her blatant offsite behavior will bite her workplace butt.
A gentleman never kisses and tells. Neither should a lady.
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girlonthetv
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Post by girlonthetv on Apr 3, 2014 16:49:52 GMT -5
You're not a prude. What is the age of the girl? A recently college graduate? First lesson you learn about the real world is: it isn't college. The second lesson is you never dip your pen in the company ink. $5 bucks says the guy she is fooling around with is married.
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 17:48:18 GMT -5
Seriously, if there is that much of a connection take each others info and get in touch after you get home. Get together on your own dime. Would you feel the same if it was a platonic same-sex relationship? Haven't seen each other for years and you want to spend your off time catching up? Would the companies cost have been any different if this one person had paid for their own room, leaving one other person in a single room? I just don't get it, and we can agree to disagree. I'm just curious. No I would not feel the same if it was a platonic same-sex relationship. I do think catching up with an old friend (of either sex) is different than hooking up with someone you just met at a work event. Call me crazy... And the company cost has nothing to do with how I look at the behaviour. Even if she paid her own room, she is there as a representative of our company. Without that connection she wouldn't be there at all.
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haapai
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Post by haapai on Apr 3, 2014 17:51:11 GMT -5
I feel sorry for the tattler. She's pretty much tethered to this gal until Saturday. In her shoes, I'd probably be gossiping as well. I'd need to do that in order to relieve the stress of being polite to someone who is behaving quite childishly. I'd also be furious that this gal's behavior is endangering the annual junket.
Luckily for the tattler, she'll be able to spend Saturday and Sunday night in her own bed before hitting the office. The situation will look quite different by Monday.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 19:06:30 GMT -5
I'm starting to realize that I am incredibly self centered. I just can't make myself care about something like this at all. Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Apr 3, 2014 19:27:32 GMT -5
I feel sorry for the tattler. She's pretty much tethered to this gal until Saturday. In her shoes, I'd probably be gossiping as well. I'd need to do that in order to relieve the stress of being polite to someone who is behaving quite childishly. I'd also be furious that this gal's behavior is endangering the annual junket. Luckily for the tattler, she'll be able to spend Saturday and Sunday night in her own bed before hitting the office. The situation will look quite different by Monday.
Nah, I see her running around from cubicle to cubicle telling those who weren't there what went on with co-worker. Oh, in tech times she will just probably email everyone
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haapai
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Post by haapai on Apr 3, 2014 20:26:45 GMT -5
That's what I'm afraid of. If she does that, she's the awful prudish gossip with lousy boundaries and a vindictive streak.
I hope that she finds a way to avoid being painted like that. Perhaps deflecting all questions regarding the conference with a vague murmer of "Too much togetherness, not enough alone time..." will do the trick.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Apr 3, 2014 20:34:04 GMT -5
I feel sorry for the tattler. She's pretty much tethered to this gal until Saturday. In her shoes, I'd probably be gossiping as well. I'd need to do that in order to relieve the stress of being polite to someone who is behaving quite childishly. I'd also be furious that this gal's behavior is endangering the annual junket. Luckily for the tattler, she'll be able to spend Saturday and Sunday night in her own bed before hitting the office. The situation will look quite different by Monday.
Nah, I see her running around from cubicle to cubicle telling those who weren't there what went on with co-worker. Oh, in tech times she will just probably email everyone Maybe her boss should have a word with her before monday about gossiping ìn the office.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Apr 3, 2014 20:34:30 GMT -5
I will not share a room with a coworker. I barely like sharing a room with my husband. Exactly Sent from my Nexus 10
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Otto the Orange
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Post by Otto the Orange on Apr 4, 2014 1:55:11 GMT -5
Haters!
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