Is "Tumbling" on your resume?

[Deleted]

So, I think I mentioned this before, but my older son is not the most athletic kid and has a real issue with anything that requires any kind of flexibility.  Last year in school the gymnastics unit was torture for him, mainly because he couldn't do a freaking somersault.  Now, I seriously could give a rip if he can or not.  It seems completely unimportant to me, but his phy ed teacher seems to think this is like a requirement for every child and he needs to do this or he'll never get anywhere in life. So, now this kid who scores in the 97th percentile in the state for math/science and reading is terrified to go to school and was literally crying starting a week ago when he found out gymnastics starts this week.

This morning his teacher emailed me worried about how stressed he is and afraid he's not going to be able to function in class for a couple weeks like last year.  She told me DS told her that I had told him that I wasn't going to let them keep him late and she thinks I should email or call the phy ed teacher to let him know how I feel.  Apparently she thinks they should just let him do an alternate activity.  I intend to, but what do I tell this guy without coming off that I think he's a complete ass??   While I get that physical fitness is important, I don't think humiliating a kid over not being able to do a somersault is cool.  I don't know if he thinks he's being helpful getting him to overcome this "difficulty" in his life or what, but I think they should just drop it.

[Deleted]

I don't think they should just drop it, but I don't think they should humiliate him either.   He should be able to keep practicing in Phys Ed without being humiliated.  That is the message you should send to the teacher.    Maybe you can practice at home, too.

[Chocolate Lover]

I'm with alternate activity. That's just stupid. When was the last time any of us did a somersault anyway? 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:39:35 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

I don't think they should just drop it, but I don't think they should humiliate him either.   He should be able to keep practicing in Phys Ed without being humiliated.  That is the message you should send to the teacher.    Maybe you can practice at home, too.

Oh man, we tried, but he really doesn't seem to be able to.  Last year they kept him after school for 2 hours a day for a week to work on it. 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:44:14 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:39:35 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

I don't think they should just drop it, but I don't think they should humiliate him either.   He should be able to keep practicing in Phys Ed without being humiliated.  That is the message you should send to the teacher.    Maybe you can practice at home, too.

Oh man, we tried, but he really doesn't seem to be able to.  Last year they kept him after school for 2 hours a day for a week to work on it. 

Keep working.  He is going to feel great when he gets it. My dad was a phys ed teacher for k-6.  He said some kids couldn't even get their feet to leave the ground when they jumped.   He would just keep working at the level they were, though and celebrate the small victories.  My dad was not the stereotypical hard ass climb the rope type of teacher, though.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I can't do a decent somersault or cartwheel to save my soul and I seem to be doing all right in life.  Phys Ed holds a lot of bad memories for me because it was more about humilation/you suck as a human being because you can't do X than actually learning anything.   Maybe that's why I can handle posting on YM!
 

I would bring up the teacher has your kid stressed to the point it affects other areas of his life and has him afraid to go to school. What does he propose as a solution?  I'd hope you could find a middle ground working together.

[milee]

Sorry your son is going through this.

As a mom, is it your sense that the problem is that there's an issue with the class (teach is a jerk, kids pick on him, etc.) or that he's feeling insecure about his abilities?  If it's a problem with the class, that would suggest one approach, but if it's a problem where he's feeling insecure about his abilities, that would suggest another.

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:47:21 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:44:14 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Oh man, we tried, but he really doesn't seem to be able to.  Last year they kept him after school for 2 hours a day for a week to work on it. 

Keep working.  He is going to feel great when he gets it. My dad was a phys ed teacher for k-6.  He said some kids couldn't even get their feet to leave the ground when they jumped.   He would just keep working at the level they were, though and celebrate the small victories.  My dad was not the stereotypical hard ass climb the rope type of teacher, though.

I know.  I wish he'd just get it once.  He's as big as me, so I can't just tuck him into a ball and roll him around like I do his brother.

He's seeing a counselor already for anxiety issues, and was doing really well, but this past week it's through the roof again.

[muttleynfelix]

Feb 3, 2014 14:42:34 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

I'm with alternate activity. That's just stupid. When was the last time any of us did a somersault anyway? 

Wednesday night.   

MPL - I agree with the alternate activity.  A somersault doesn't seem something worth stressing out over. 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:47:59 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

I can't do a decent somersault or cartwheel to save my soul and I seem to be doing all right in life.  Phys Ed holds a lot of bad memories for me because it was more about humilation/you suck as a human being because you can't do X than actually learning anything.   Maybe that's why I can handle posting on YM!
 

I would bring up the teacher has your kid stressed to the point it affects other areas of his life and has him afraid to go to school. What does he propose as a solution?  I'd hope you could find a middle ground working together.

Phy ed brings bad memories for me too.  I'm basically blind in my left eye so anything that required any kind of depth perception I sucked at.  So, basically all the team sports like softball, volleyball, kickball.  It didn't matter how hard I tried, I'd always be the one getting hit in the head with the ball and losing the game for my team.

[Chocolate Lover]

Feb 3, 2014 14:57:29 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:42:34 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

I'm with alternate activity. That's just stupid. When was the last time any of us did a somersault anyway? 

Wednesday night.   

MPL - I agree with the alternate activity.  A somersault doesn't seem something worth stressing out over. 

Did you have someone standing there waiting for you to do it and making you feel like crap when you couldn't?

I'm sure I've done one or two as an adult but it's not exactly a life skill I think a kid should be kept after school for 2 hours every day for a week over. 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:53:12 GMT -5 milee said:

Sorry your son is going through this.

As a mom, is it your sense that the problem is that there's an issue with the class (teach is a jerk, kids pick on him, etc.) or that he's feeling insecure about his abilities?  If it's a problem with the class, that would suggest one approach, but if it's a problem where he's feeling insecure about his abilities, that would suggest another.

I don't think he gets along with the teacher for starters because he complains about him for other things (before school care, lunch), but he also does seem to really be trying. I mean he just had to do ONE somersault to be able to go home and ended up staying every single night for 2 hours.  One time they had his Dad and I come to help him. 

[Waffle]

I don't even remember what a somersault is.

Could you get him a doctor's excuse to get him out of it?  (My asthma and a sympathetic doctor kept me out of high school pe)

[Deleted]

It doesn't help that he's already a social misfit and it just draws more attention to him.  He is very melodramatic though.  I wish he wouldn't let himself get so worked up.

[muttleynfelix]

Feb 3, 2014 14:59:06 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:57:29 GMT -5 muttleynfelix said:

Wednesday night.   

MPL - I agree with the alternate activity.  A somersault doesn't seem something worth stressing out over. 

Did you have someone standing there waiting for you to do it and making you feel like crap when you couldn't?

I'm sure I've done one or two as an adult but it's not exactly a life skill I think a kid should be kept after school for 2 hours every day for a week over. 

Well, DS asked me to do it. He was doing them too and if I don't do it well he tells me "mommy, that wasn't good, you need to do it again".

But I don't think it is something worth stressing a child out over at all. I really don't. DS wouldn't even know how to do one if I hadn't taught him. We tried moving on to cartwheel's Wednesday night as well. That didn't go over nearly as well.

[chen35]

To me, Phys Ed should be about teaching the kids to love physical activity, and to find something that they will enjoy for the rest of their lives. The way the teacher is approaching this is doing the opposite, making your son feel like he's bad at it. This isn't like math, where if you miss one concept you won't get anything going forward. 
I was the kid who couldn't do a somersault. I finally got it, and I didn't feel like I accomplished something huge, I just felt grateful that I could move on with my life.

[michelyn8]

Define somersault please.  Are we talking cartwheel, roundoff, or heels over head flipping through the air (I'm thinking like running across a mat, hitting the mat in a handstand but keep going like you see in floor routines).  I can see working on a cartwheel, roundoff or even a basic on the ground flip but if someone was trying to force my child to learn a heels over head flipping through the air somersault, I'd be livid.  Some kids can do these with no problem (or fear) while others just never will.

None of these activities are necessary for life long physical fitness let alone any kind of success in life.  Not to mention, the potential for injury if its not done correctly. I watch my 2 year old granddaughter do flips all the time and cringe every time because as an adult I know the potential for neck injury.  I don't stop her though because I don't want her to be afraid of doing these things plus I can't resist the big smile from the fun she has when she's trying to slide off  the couch into a back flip. 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 15:20:05 GMT -5 michelyn8 said:

Define somersault please.  Are we talking cartwheel, roundoff, or heels over head flipping through the air (I'm thinking like running across a mat, hitting the mat in a handstand but keep going like you see in floor routines).  I can see working on a cartwheel, roundoff or even a basic on the ground flip but if someone was trying to force my child to learn a heels over head flipping through the air somersault, I'd be livid.  Some kids can do these with no problem (or fear) while others just never will.

None of these activities are necessary for life long physical fitness let alone any kind of success in life.  Not to mention, the potential for injury if its not done correctly. I watch my 2 year old granddaughter do flips all the time and cringe every time because as an adult I know the potential for neck injury.  I don't stop her though because I don't want her to be afraid of doing these things plus I can't resist the big smile from the fun she has when she's trying to slide off  the couch into a back flip. 

Just on the ground, tuck your head and roll. 

[The Captain]

I would tell the PE teacher to pound sand.  Not everyone is going to be able to do everything.  This sounds borderline harassment to me.

Now for the full disclosure - I was the kid who couldn't run as far, do as many push/pull ups, situps etc.  It was not from a lack of effort, I was on the cross country team and in volleyball.  There were just some things I couldn't do, and yes - somersaults was one of them.

I wasn't diagnosed with asthma until I was in my early 20's.  As it turns out, no - I was not supposed to feel like I was going to pass out everytime I did strenous activity.  No amount of effort would ever change my results (with the types of medications they had at the time).  Steady moderate activity I was fine with, which is why they thought I was just lazy.

No kid needs that kind of pressure with something that won't matter 10 years from now.

[swamp]

I can do a somersault, a cartwheel and a round off. Clearly it's helped me get where I am today.

But seriously, some kids just can't do it.  I don't see why this is such a big deal to the gym teacher.    This is exactly why some people are so turned off from any type of "exercise." 

[giramomma]

I wouldn't stress over it, either. But have you looked into OT for his flexibility issues?

[Abby Normal]

I firmly believe that PE should be graded on effort and improvement not ability.  Some kids just don't have the same abilities.

My son is not a runner, he will never be a runner.  We joke that he runs like a freight train- slow to start, gets up to speed and really slow to stop.

In PE they were doing sprints. He received a grade of "needs improvement" on running and skipping. I laughed so hard.

[Phoenix84]

Man, I'm going to have to try a summersault and a cartwheel after this thread.  I'm not too worried about the summersault, the cartwheel might have disasterous results though.

My agility isn't that great, but I am pretty flexible for a big guy, or so my karate teacher always said.  In those presidential fitness tests we did in high school, I always scored really well on flexibility tests.

I'm definitely not a good athelete though, except for dodgeball for some reason.

[Deleted]

I have never been able to do a cartwheel.  A somersault was about the extent of my tumbling skill in grade school. 

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 14:42:34 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

I'm with alternate activity. That's just stupid. When was the last time any of us did a somersault anyway? 

never?

that would be my answer

and yes, being able to overcome obstacles in life is very important

i would not put somersaults into "that" category

[Angel!]

Feb 3, 2014 15:03:43 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:53:12 GMT -5 milee said:

Sorry your son is going through this.

As a mom, is it your sense that the problem is that there's an issue with the class (teach is a jerk, kids pick on him, etc.) or that he's feeling insecure about his abilities?  If it's a problem with the class, that would suggest one approach, but if it's a problem where he's feeling insecure about his abilities, that would suggest another.

I don't think he gets along with the teacher for starters because he complains about him for other things (before school care, lunch), but he also does seem to really be trying. I mean he just had to do ONE somersault to be able to go home and ended up staying every single night for 2 hours.  One time they had his Dad and I come to help him. 

Seriously .  Two hours late several nights for a freaking somersault.  That has to be the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.  I would work with either the PE teacher or the principal to come to a reasonable solution.  

[milee]

It seems there may be several separate issues here.  As a mom, I'd be trying to figure out how they work and what's important.

If the teacher is just bullying your kid over something that's - in the big scheme of things - relatively unimportant, that's one potential issue. On the other hand, if this is something your son should be able to do with some practice and help, then it's not unreasonable to want to help him get over his fear/resistance/weakness/whatever.  For example, if your son gets worked up and his emotion stops him from taking on challenges or improving, then this could be one of those things that's worth following through with even though the somersault itself isn't a big deal.

There are times when I step in to protect my kids from unreasonable expectations or punishment.  But there are other times when I side with the tough teacher and let them know this is something they can do - while providing support, help, opportunity, whatever it needs to meet the challenge.

You mentioned in another thread that one of the sons is struggling with weight.  Is this that son?  Possibly he's dealing with some additional issues of being a little embarrassed about the weight and starting to doubt his abilities?  If so, I might lean towards the side of helping him to overcome this challenge so that he doesn't walk away with the lesson that he's incapable of "simple" (what he and the other kids might think) physical activities.  Again, who cares if he can do a somersault?  Nobody.  But you and he will care if the lesson he gets is that he can't do basic physical activities with some practice.

I probably have some bias here, though.  I wasn't a heavy kid at all - dangerously skinny.  But I wasn't good at any sports, had no coordination, etc. and over years of not doing well in PE at school just internalized the idea that although I wasn't heavy, basic physical fitness wasn't possible for me.  It wasn't until I was an adult that I discovered otherwise.  Some adults never discover otherwise and that's part of why Americans are having struggles with weight.  If you can help him to understand that basic physical activity is possible for him, that would be a huge gift and you'd be helping him on the right track in many things mentally and physically.

[mmhmm]

Feb 3, 2014 14:54:23 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:47:21 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

Keep working.  He is going to feel great when he gets it. My dad was a phys ed teacher for k-6.  He said some kids couldn't even get their feet to leave the ground when they jumped.   He would just keep working at the level they were, though and celebrate the small victories.  My dad was not the stereotypical hard ass climb the rope type of teacher, though.

I know.  I wish he'd just get it once.  He's as big as me, so I can't just tuck him into a ball and roll him around like I do his brother.

He's seeing a counselor already for anxiety issues, and was doing really well, but this past week it's through the roof again.

How old is your little guy?  Most kids can do a somersault by age 5, but there are some who take a bit longer.  I think maybe the phys ed teacher is freaking out a bit over expected "milestones".  Doing a somersault is one of those.  As long as your boy is doing find physically per his pediatrician, whether or not he can somersault isn't all that important.  It's just a missed milestone that means little when it's a stand-alone.

I'd talk to the phys ed teacher and explain some of the things the boy is dealing with (like anxiety) and let the teacher know his/her cooperation will be expected so the boy doesn't feel like a failure.  Offer to bring a note from the pediatrician if "teach" won't acknowledge that a somersault isn't the be-all, end-all of milestones.

[Abby Normal]

My son could never do one properly.  Which is from standing to standing position. He would end up rolling to the side.  But it was one of the state standards, so they need to "check the box"

[Deleted]

Feb 3, 2014 17:43:57 GMT -5 mmhmm said:

Feb 3, 2014 14:54:23 GMT -5 minnesotapaintlady said:

I know.  I wish he'd just get it once.  He's as big as me, so I can't just tuck him into a ball and roll him around like I do his brother.

He's seeing a counselor already for anxiety issues, and was doing really well, but this past week it's through the roof again.

How old is your little guy?  Most kids can do a somersault by age 5, but there are some who take a bit longer.  I think maybe the phys ed teacher is freaking out a bit over expected "milestones".  Doing a somersault is one of those.  As long as your boy is doing find physically per his pediatrician, whether or not he can somersault isn't all that important.  It's just a missed milestone that means little when it's a stand-alone.

I'd talk to the phys ed teacher and explain some of the things the boy is dealing with (like anxiety) and let the teacher know his/her cooperation will be expected so the boy doesn't feel like a failure.  Offer to bring a note from the pediatrician if "teach" won't acknowledge that a somersault isn't the be-all, end-all of milestones.

The "little guy" is almost 12!  He's 5'3" and 150 pounds and has gone through this same tumbling unit with the same teacher for 6 years now, although I only remember it being traumatizing the past two, especially last year. 

I just don't think he's going to get it and I'm fine with that, but I don't want to be the Mom that jumps on the teacher for trying.  The fact that his actual classroom teacher emailed me wanting me to talk to the phy ed teacher has me thinking it wouldn't be out of line though.  She's been his classroom teacher for three years and has seen how this goes down.