What don't you "get"?

[Peace Of Mind]

Sept 6, 2013 15:17:24 GMT -5 midjd said:

I don't see how cutting is a release and not painful. No judgement at all. I just don't see how that works.

IME, the physical pain was always less than whatever mental/emotional pain I was going through at the time - the physical pain was more of a distraction.

You know how after a good hard cry, you feel exhausted, but sort of cleansed? It's kind of the same thing.

Then why not just cry instead?  Or do you not get that "cleansed" feeling like some of us do so you need to do something stronger (for lack of a better word) for the release? 

And thank you for answering my questions.  I've worked with people who confided in me that they used to cut and showed me their scars but I never knew how to ask these questions without it coming out wrong.  I do that enough in just everyday conversation! 

[midjd]

Then why not just cry instead? Or do you not get that "cleansed" feeling like some of us do so you need to do something stronger (for lack of a better word) for the release?

It's probably different for everyone, but I am one of those who cries at the drop of a hat anyway, so it didn't do much for me (unless it was the hysterical, sobbing-for-hours kind - but who has time for that? )

[happyscooter]

I don't understand why someone watches a (bleep) movie that is so (bleep) boring that the (bleep) person on the (bleep) show can't even (bleep) stay awake during (bleep) filming.


DH will channel surf and there will be 5-6 bleeps in one minute or less.  Who understands what they were trying to say

[milee]

Sept 6, 2013 15:29:50 GMT -5 midjd said:

Then why not just cry instead? Or do you not get that "cleansed" feeling like some of us do so you need to do something stronger (for lack of a better word) for the release?

It's probably different for everyone, but I am one of those who cries at the drop of a hat anyway, so it didn't do much for me (unless it was the hysterical, sobbing-for-hours kind - but who has time for that? )

I think I can understand the cutting, but the crying would be tough.  Can't remember the last time I cried, just seems like a bad idea.

This thread is making me realize how tightly wound I am. 

[Deleted]

Sept 6, 2013 15:01:18 GMT -5 milee said:

Sept 6, 2013 14:31:15 GMT -5 @davebo said:

But I think that people that don’t like small talk kinda miss the point of small talk. It’s because that topic is necessarily important, but it’s more because it acts as a bridge to other topics where you might have more of a connection. My wife will joke with me that I interrogate people when I meet them because I ask questions about where they grew up, what they do, how long they lived there, what college they went to, where they grew up, what their parents do, how many siblings, where do they live. I don’t ask that rapid fire, but I usually have a fairly good idea of the profile of someone after talking with them for a while. 

The part about missing the point about small talk is probably true.  Unfortunately for those of us who are missing the point, we also probably misinterpret the questions.  It takes me a while before I know and am interested enough in someone to want to ask those questions and if someone is asking them of me, often wonder about their motives.  Maybe there are also some privacy or boundary issues there, but when a person who I've just met or only interact with casually asks many detailed questions, I can start to feel a little defensive.  It seems too personal and it's not comfortable for me. 

I don't want to know the name of your dog or see pictures of your kids and unless I am a little more comfy with you don't really want to tell you about my dog or kids, either. 

I guess I'm talking about in situations where you're kinda "pre-qualified".  If I was seated next to somebody on an airplane, I would never ask those questions.  If I'm seated next to someone at a wedding, we both have a mutual acquaintance (at the very least) so I wouldn't think they are trying to get information about my family like some kind of creep.

But I have acquaintances that my wife and I have had dinner with and hung out with that, I swear, have rarely asked us any questions about things in our world. And these people aren’t really self-absorbed either..maybe just unaware. Sometimes I think “Why are we even over here when I’m the one doing all the work keeping this going?” I do not mind listening to someone talk about whatever I’m asking about, but it is really strange to me when the person doesn’t realize that this is all a one-way street. If someone asked me about my job and what I do, I will always ask them the same questions. I just find it strange when other people don’t do that.

[Deleted]

Sept 6, 2013 14:30:27 GMT -5 kittensaver said:

Sept 6, 2013 14:26:46 GMT -5 movingforward said:

If I had tons of money and land I would have otters.  They would have a huge play area and I would hire someone who knew how to keep everything clean.  I would have a specialist when needed come and treat them for any infections, etc.  I would NOT try to interact or play with them, but just sit and watch them play and swim for several hours each day.  Oh, to dream..

I would do this with big cats. I agree! . . . . oh to dream

We have a private rescue locally that started with big cats... Other exotics are now placed with thm as well... I just took them a bin of meat this weekend when I was cleaning out the freezer... Big cats are expensive to feed.

[Chocolate Lover]

Sept 6, 2013 15:49:58 GMT -5 @davebo said:

Sept 6, 2013 15:01:18 GMT -5 milee said:

The part about missing the point about small talk is probably true.  Unfortunately for those of us who are missing the point, we also probably misinterpret the questions.  It takes me a while before I know and am interested enough in someone to want to ask those questions and if someone is asking them of me, often wonder about their motives.  Maybe there are also some privacy or boundary issues there, but when a person who I've just met or only interact with casually asks many detailed questions, I can start to feel a little defensive.  It seems too personal and it's not comfortable for me. 

I don't want to know the name of your dog or see pictures of your kids and unless I am a little more comfy with you don't really want to tell you about my dog or kids, either. 

I guess I'm talking about in situations where you're kinda "pre-qualified".  If I was seated next to somebody on an airplane, I would never ask those questions.  If I'm seated next to someone at a wedding, we both have a mutual acquaintance (at the very least) so I wouldn't think they are trying to get information about my family like some kind of creep.

But I have acquaintances that my wife and I have had dinner with and hung out with that, I swear, have rarely asked us any questions about things in our world. And these people aren’t really self-absorbed either..maybe just unaware. Sometimes I think “Why are we even over here when I’m the one doing all the work keeping this going?” I do not mind listening to someone talk about whatever I’m asking about, but it is really strange to me when the person doesn’t realize that this is all a one-way street. If someone asked me about my job and what I do, I will always ask them the same questions. I just find it strange when other people don’t do that.

Yeah, us small talk challenged people forget that we can/should ask those sorts of questions in return. We're not being rude and it's not that we don't care (ok, sometimes we don't if we don't know you) but it really doesn't occur to us to ask back the questions that sometimes get under our skin. 

[milee]

Sept 6, 2013 15:49:58 GMT -5 @davebo said:

Sept 6, 2013 15:01:18 GMT -5 milee said:

The part about missing the point about small talk is probably true.  Unfortunately for those of us who are missing the point, we also probably misinterpret the questions.  It takes me a while before I know and am interested enough in someone to want to ask those questions and if someone is asking them of me, often wonder about their motives.  Maybe there are also some privacy or boundary issues there, but when a person who I've just met or only interact with casually asks many detailed questions, I can start to feel a little defensive.  It seems too personal and it's not comfortable for me. 

I don't want to know the name of your dog or see pictures of your kids and unless I am a little more comfy with you don't really want to tell you about my dog or kids, either. 

I guess I'm talking about in situations where you're kinda "pre-qualified".  If I was seated next to somebody on an airplane, I would never ask those questions.  If I'm seated next to someone at a wedding, we both have a mutual acquaintance (at the very least) so I wouldn't think they are trying to get information about my family like some kind of creep.

But I have acquaintances that my wife and I have had dinner with and hung out with that, I swear, have rarely asked us any questions about things in our world. And these people aren’t really self-absorbed either..maybe just unaware. Sometimes I think “Why are we even over here when I’m the one doing all the work keeping this going?” I do not mind listening to someone talk about whatever I’m asking about, but it is really strange to me when the person doesn’t realize that this is all a one-way street. If someone asked me about my job and what I do, I will always ask them the same questions. I just find it strange when other people don’t do that.

OK, makes sense. Your example about traveling on airplanes was more what I was thinking about; for years I traveled for business and you can't imagine how many strangers want to chat with other strangers for hours and hours about nothing.

It wouldn't be weird to want to connect with people at a wedding.  And it's not weird to try to make closer connections to people you are friends with.  Maybe part of the disconnect comes in when people move at different paces with the connection or simply have different levels and types of interest?  Not exactly a self-absorbed thing, but I'm not always very interested in what the other person does for a living or what sports activities their kids participate in so those are not things I'm likely to ask.  And they might not be interested about talking about things I would find interesting, so therein lies the rub.  A little like dancing where one partner is doing the Charleston and the other is doing the Samba... nothing wrong with either, but they're not very compatible.

[whoisjohngalt]

Sept 6, 2013 14:31:15 GMT -5 @davebo said:

Sept 6, 2013 9:32:28 GMT -5 milee said:

Small talk.  Knowing that it's one of those "nonnegotiable social conventions" and that it's something most people bond over, I work hard at small talk, but I do it because I know other people expect it not because I enjoy it or have any clue why other people like it or do it.  Generally, if I ask about someone's life, children, etc., it's because I care about them and want to know.  It's tough for me to muster that kind of interest for the people that I don't really know or care about (similar to the celebrity thing, it's not that I dislike them, it's just a neutral kind of apathy.)  So it's a bit of a struggle to chit chat and I know that makes me appear antisocial or even hostile.  I'm not, I'm just not good at and don't understand small talk. 

I must be the opposite of you in this regard because I totally don't get people that don't "small talk". I get if it’s 2 people on an elevator and one doesn't want to chit-chat, but people that you know fairly well that don’t ask questions about anything is very strange to me. I just don’t know how you can really be friends with people when you don’t know stuff about their world and the only way you get there is by asking questions.

But I think that people that don’t like small talk kinda miss the point of small talk. It’s because that topic is necessarily important, but it’s more because it acts as a bridge to other topics where you might have more of a connection. My wife will joke with me that I interrogate people when I meet them because I ask questions about where they grew up, what they do, how long they lived there, what college they went to, where they grew up, what their parents do, how many siblings, where do they live. I don’t ask that rapid fire, but I usually have a fairly good idea of the profile of someone after talking with them for a while.

But I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gotten into more substantive conversations with people as a result of all of the initial questions. My wife’s friends think that I know a lot of people because usually I’m finding out that, someone that we just met and myself have a mutual friend. But in reality, it’s just because I’m asking questions.

My husband does what you do and people open up to him like crazy.

I am just too self-adsorbed to care to ask people "light" questions. The things that I REALLY want to ask are too rude to ask of someone you barely know. 

So, small talk is too torturous for me

[milee]

Sept 6, 2013 15:54:30 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

Sept 6, 2013 15:49:58 GMT -5 @davebo said:

Yeah, us small talk challenged people forget that we can/should ask those sorts of questions in return. We're not being rude and it's not that we don't care (ok, sometimes we don't if we don't know you) but it really doesn't occur to us to ask back the questions that sometimes get under our skin. 

OK, this will sound like an awful thing, but it's not really that I forget, it's that I don't want to ask a question for which I know I do not want to know the response.  To return to an example that we've mentioned before, if someone asks what I do for a living, I make a brief one-liner jokey response and move on into another topic of conversation.  It's not that I'm unaware that social convention is that I ask the same thing in return, it's that most of the time I know what the person does and frankly, I don't really want to talk about that for 5-10 minutes.  I will if I have to and will be polite about it, but I find that stuff excruciating.

With people I'm closer to, I can ask all the oddball, probing or detailed questions that I need to ask to find the topic of what the person does for a living interesting.  But unless I know them well enough, I'm aware that it's going to be a protracted snoozefest of them describing something really boring and me smiling and nodding politely, with occasional bland replies that let them know I am listening.  Yuck.

[Chocolate Lover]

Sept 6, 2013 16:05:56 GMT -5 milee said:

Sept 6, 2013 15:54:30 GMT -5 Chocolate Lover said:

Yeah, us small talk challenged people forget that we can/should ask those sorts of questions in return. We're not being rude and it's not that we don't care (ok, sometimes we don't if we don't know you) but it really doesn't occur to us to ask back the questions that sometimes get under our skin. 

OK, this will sound like an awful thing, but it's not really that I forget, it's that I don't want to ask a question for which I know I do not want to know the response.  To return to an example that we've mentioned before, if someone asks what I do for a living, I make a brief one-liner jokey response and move on into another topic of conversation.  It's not that I'm unaware that social convention is that I ask the same thing in return, it's that most of the time I know what the person does and frankly, I don't really want to talk about that for 5-10 minutes.  I will if I have to and will be polite about it, but I find that stuff excruciating.

With people I'm closer to, I can ask all the oddball, probing or detailed questions that I need to ask to find the topic of what the person does for a living interesting.  But unless I know them well enough, I'm aware that it's going to be a protracted snoozefest of them describing something really boring and me smiling and nodding politely, with occasional bland replies that let them know I am listening.  Yuck.

No, it's not awful and I agree that plenty of times I don't care but there are times, especially if I want out of this conversation or have somewhere else to be, that i just forget that I should respond in kind.

The "hi how are you?" in passing at work as you walk past someone's office/desk I'll answer and forget that I probably should ask how they are too and pause to hear the answer. Or at least slow down. At a party type thing, if I'm on the receiving end of the 20 questions game, I'm so busy trying to actually answer and process what is and isn't just too long an answer or plain old TMI for a virtual stranger, that I forget to reciprocate. 

[movingforward]

I probably share too much info about myself sometimes .  I am kind of an open book.  Then later I think about it and realize  maybe the person didn't want that much info.  I do seem to make friends easily though... I don't talk to random people on planes or anything like that but I am pretty good at striking up conversations at professional conferences, parties and other large gatherings.  What I have found though is that I either connect with a person easily or I don't.  If it is someone I don't connect well with then I tend to find a reason to excuse myself and go elsewhere but if I hit it off with someone then I can talk for hours.  I am also one of those people who likes to be around people on my terms so sometimes I want to just veg and be by myself and then sometimes I feel very social.  Geez, I just realized I have the personality of a cat

[buystoys]

Sept 6, 2013 15:12:41 GMT -5 Peace Of Mind said:

Sept 6, 2013 15:01:30 GMT -5 giramomma said:

I never felt pain in the moment, only release.

But I don't get how that works.  I totally get your DH's addiction.  I'm hedonistic and love pleasure.  Being touched, delicious foods, the warmth and wonderful feeling while drinking a nice glass of wine or whatever...  I don't see how cutting is a release and not painful.  No judgement at all.  I just don't see how that works.   I also don't get S&M and how that feels good. 

POM, S&M is also a hedonistic pleasure and there can be a tremendous level of release, depending on what your kink is.  IIRC, Drama mentioned Shades of Gray earlier in this topic.  There are a lot of people in the S&M community that find the series hilarious.  (Personally, I enjoyed it for reasons that had nothing to do with the trite sex scenes that were written.)  

For giramomma, cutting was a release.  In certain S&M scenes, such as spanking, the build up of pain is the release.  It's really all a head game, based on what the masochist needs and what the sadist is deriving their own pleasure from.  There is a fairly well-known club in NYC.  I personally know some people who frequent it.  The sadists get a real sense of accomplishment, top of the world, climbed the mountain feeling from eliciting the response from the masochist they are "playing" with.  The masochists get a very fulfilling experience from reaching a limit or peak they've not met before.  It's so hard to explain in "vanilla" terms, to use the phraseology.  But I get it.  There are aspects of my own life that I can connect to what I've been told, so it's very easy for me to make the emotional/sexual/pleasure connections in my own head.

Hope that helps to explain it somewhat!  Please feel free to PM me if you like, as I truly have no issues discussing this one-on-one.  Just not so comfortable saying a whole lot more publicly.

[Tennesseer]

Sept 6, 2013 9:44:30 GMT -5 Gardening Grandma said:

I don't get the thing about taking a photo of oneself in front of the mirror and posting it on Facebook. And not smiling.

Maybe they are not happy with the quantity/quality of their displayed (for all the world to see) man bits?  

[teen persuasion]

I don't get Hummers for commuting in the 'burbs.
A lot of politics flies right over my head.
I don't get keeping up w/ the Jones.
I rarely do FB (for myself), though I keep up the FB page for work.  Don't get twitter.
Can't figure out the attraction of Candy Crush, Farmville, et. al.
Can't wrap my head around people who don't read.  Ever.  Like it's torture!
Never learned to read music - despite the kids 59 different instruments and solos and concerts and...
DH says I can't tell a story from beginning to end w/o getting off on a tangent before getting to the point (or losing his interest).  Maybe I should stop now...

[Peace Of Mind]

Sept 6, 2013 16:27:26 GMT -5 movingforward said:

I probably share too much info about myself sometimes .  I am kind of an open book.  Then later I think about it and realize  maybe the person didn't want that much info.  I do seem to make friends easily though... I don't talk to random people on planes or anything like that but I am pretty good at striking up conversations at professional conferences, parties and other large gatherings.  What I have found though is that I either connect with a person easily or I don't.  If it is someone I don't connect well with then I tend to find a reason to excuse myself and go elsewhere but if I hit it off with someone then I can talk for hours.  I am also one of those people who likes to be around people on my terms so sometimes I want to just veg and be by myself and then sometimes I feel very social.  Geez, I just realized I have the personality of a cat

LMAO!!  Me too!  And I don't know how I missed this earlier but you are my younger twin! 

[ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ]

I don't get the celebrity hype that so many seem addicted to - some to the point of obsession/worship.

"Reality" (cough, cough) TV is another. Don't people "get" that those shows are mostly scripted and/or edited? Yet so many are addicted to those shows.

Rap music. They don't sing, so why is it called music?

[Deleted]

Two things that I don't get:

One is big, shiny new cars. My last new-from-the-manufacturer car was a 1991. The new-car enchantment lasted about a week. And, as Mrs. cawiau found out, they're accident magnets. Before I'd made the first payment on mine, the overhead cable of our automatic garage door opener broke and a heavy spring fell onto the roof of the car and dented it. Two weeks after I bought my new Mustang in 1979, a kid in the car next to mine in the parking lot opened his car door too hard right into my car door and-clunk- there was the first dent on the passenger-side door of my perfect new car. The car loans people take on to get these things are shackles that go on for 6 or 7 years and the gas and tire costs on the trucks and SUVS are crazy. DH and I save buckets of money by buying used and dependable and driving them till they fall apart.

The other is professional team sports. Part of this may be that I'm terrible at them myself so I can't identify with the players on the field, but on TV it's just boredom punctuated by commercials. Over the course of my life, the rules of football have been explained to me several times. I still don't understand them. Attending a game is even crazier. Fight the crowds, pay a few hundred dollars for parking and tickets for the family, spend another $100 or so on food and even more on souvenirs. Our local stadium has used the bombings in Boston to clamp down even more on what you can bring in- bags must be tiny (like the size that will hold a smartphone, a few credit cards and your keys) or transparent "for your safety". In reality, it makes it easier for them to enforce their rules about food being brought in from outside. Everything is confiscated. Even water. You want hydration, you'll pay their prices. I'll stay home and ride my bicycle, thanks.

[wvugurl26]

The bag thing is an NFL wide policy this year. I saw announcements from a couple teams and it mentioned nothing about motivation for it other than safety.

[Deleted]

I'll add another thing I don't get even though I hang out on cruisecritic boards and DH and I are looking forward to our second small ship (73-passenger) Alaska cruise: we don't get cruising on the mega-ships. Hours to get on and get off. Not being able to find a seat poolside or in the main dining room. Upcharges for everything. Attempts to turn you into an income stream at every turn: kickbacks from the port shops, "art" auctions, drinks with umbrellas in them, pictures, spa treatments, rock-climbing walls... People post past cruises in their signature lines and some take 2 or 3 a year.

While it saves multiple packing and unpacking and lets you sample various cities, it seems so artificial and constrained to take an organized excursion that lasts less than a day, and be back on the ship before dinnertime. We walked the Dubrovnik city walls and met a lot of people who asked what ship we were on. We were on the Good Ship Hilton, right in the middle of town, with a view of the Adriatic from one of our windows. The day before we'd gone kayaking around the city walls and the next day we took a ferry to a nearby island (Lokrum) and hiked up to the peak where some remains of Napoleon's fort still stood. The people on the cruise ships missed all that.

[swamp]

Because people can't afford a small luxury ship but  they want to go on a cruise?  

I don't get why anyone would travel to NYC and then have dinner at the Olive Garden, but it's always packed. It obviously works for a bunch of people. 

[milee]

Sept 6, 2013 17:58:41 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Sept 6, 2013 9:44:30 GMT -5 Gardening Grandma said:

I don't get the thing about taking a photo of oneself in front of the mirror and posting it on Facebook. And not smiling.

Maybe they are not happy with the quantity/quality of their displayed (for all the world to see) man bits?  

Oh, add "sexting" to the list of things I don't get.  Even for men I find very attractive, a cellphone selfie of their junk would be most unappealing.

[Deleted]

Sept 7, 2013 10:05:04 GMT -5 swamp said:

Because people can't afford a small luxury ship but  they want to go on a cruise?  

I don't get why anyone would travel to NYC and then have dinner at the Olive Garden, but it's always packed. It obviously works for a bunch of people. 

To be fair though, while I prefer small, local places, if I can't easily find an 'allergy accomodating' place through an app, chains at least offer consistent allergy info anywhere, so you know what ou are getting...

i thnk I ate at Olive Garden once? In the 90s...

[swamp]

Because junk ain't pretty. 

[milee]

I think of it in the same way I think of a hammer.  It's a wonderful tool and I really like it, wouldn't want to be without one, but it's not something I think is particularly attractive nor do I want a picture of it...

[Tired Tess]

1. tattoos

2. the unquenchable thirst to know the private life of public figures

3. why do you care how i can afford to send my kids to college

[Deleted]

Sept 7, 2013 8:14:12 GMT -5 Ratchets said:

Just by reading back through the posts on this page, I guess I don't "get" cutting either.  I always thought it was an attention getting thing, and not a stress-reliever.

Nah, a lot of cutters do it secretly, so they don't get stopped.  I went for my shins, because I always wear pants and it's normal to have marks there.


Hum... I'm sure it's different for everyone, but for me, I was always really resilient, bouncy, and couldn't understand deep depression from childhood up through high school.  When I hit college age though, my hormones fluxed HARD.  It stunned my parents, because it happened so fast, like I was totally fine until like March freshman year, and then I shredded so suddenly.

Normally I have a lot of brain chatter, reminding me about stuff, tossing out ideas or providing cautions.  It's useful.

When my hormones went bananas, all of that inner voice turned into hateful, vicious, comments repeating nonstop.  

I think the best analogy is: imagine being trapped in a 10'x10' room, with a horribly abusive spouse, who shouts and whispers that you're worthless, a whore, disgusting, just die, your family is better off without you.  Nonstop.  Every day.  For years.  When you do something, there's always sneers at your efforts, and chatter saying you're useless, stop living and wasting resources.

There's no escaping your own head.  A lot of the chatter was totally illogical, but it just kept repeating, day after day after day, until I started to absorb it.  When I finally started to cut, it was to make the chatter shut up.  If I thought "ow" I couldn't hear chatter.  Also, since I started to believe the horrible things, from being told them pretty much every waking moment, it felt like I was taking a punishment, cleaning my slate, and I could maybe be better now, I'd paid for being worthless.

It was really twisted.   It was also the most painful thing I'd ever felt.  I've had my eardrum ruptured and two ribs snapped off, and I don't take pain medication.  I'll take broken ribs over that sort of mental horror any day.   People get broken bones.  They don't get your head acting like a verbally abusive spouse or a crowd of sneering bullies that you can't ever escape for years on end.  No weekends.  No nights off.  All horrible thoughts of "just die, everyone will be happier" even though logically it wouldn't true.  

I didn't want to talk about it, because people think you're being weak, a self absorbed pansy, rather than trying so hard to stand tall through endless vicious abuse no one can hear, that's still whispering when someone says impatiently "just stop being depressed already."

In my case my parents gripped me tight and made sure I didn't do anything drastic, and my hormones stabilized pretty much over time.  I found out that both mom and dad attempted suicide around that age too.  They basically kept promising that life keeps getting way better for them as they get older, and that it would happen for me too, hang on.  

Anyway, that was my experience.  I think for the most part it's something you may have to live through to really understand, like I hear childbirth is.

[Deleted]

Sept 7, 2013 13:03:16 GMT -5 Ratchets said:

I appreciate your candidness...that was a great post.  I understand what you mean about your mind racing all the time too, mine does as well...although not on the depressing stuff, just about what the current situation is or whatever is on my mind at the time.  I'm sure if I was born 20 years later they would have said ADD and thrown some Ritalin my way and off you go LoL...I can't imagine how tough it is if all those thoughts were depressing though, it must have taken a lot of strength to overcome it.  Do you mind me asking if they (the depressing thoughts) still happen in adulthood, or did they go away when the hormones got more balanced?

Thank you for your comments, I was really worried I'd gotten too dark.

It is light years better now, the depression has been dropping out of my life in fade out points, just getting less and less frequent and intense.  I'm not "no worries!" and iron-clad-fearless like I was as up through high school, but I'm very measured and solemn instead.  Life is definitely not terminally bleak anymore, and seems bright and fascinating again when there's good news or I run across something curious.

If my parents are any indication, being 40-70 years old should be pretty awesome.  They seem to keep getting more and more mellowed and joking the older they get.  

[Deleted]

Uwah, and to get back on topic (sorry!)


Stuff I still don't get:

~Violent humor like Road Runner and Wiley Coyote.  

~The desire for fame, the kind where paparazzi stalk you and it's hard to go out and do normal things.  It seems sort of isolating.

~People who touch art and delicate cave formations when officials say not to do it, and there's a sign right there saying "please don't touch."  

[happyscooter]

copperboxes, I have a habit of knocking on things to see how they are made.  floors that look like ceramic tile, cabinets to see if they are real wood, countertops to see if they are granite.

I don't know what I was thinking going through a visitation line for a funeral but I almost knocked on the casket to see if it was real wood.