Thank you all.

[Robert not Bobby]

Nov 21, 2011 10:15:44 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I want to give you all a thank you and a big hug.

I started therapy on Sat. Had a good hour with therapist. She agrees with doctor that I'm depressed and is encouraging me to take baby steps to deal with stuff.

She also said it sounded like I knew what I needed to do and had a good grasp on things. I think a lot of that is from this board. You've all been supportive and it really helps knowing that you're here to "talk" to/vent to/share with/smack me when I need it. So thank you all for being here.

I don't really know you but parts of Wisconsin are stunningly beautiful...just like parts of you and your inner being. There will always be dark days, but the sun always breaks through.

Heal.

[bean29]

Yes, Beth, I am sorry things are not going your way. You wanted to remodel your house a year or more ago. Did you ever do anything in the kitchen?

I say your DH should not underestimate his hours for the project. If he goes low, they may lowball his compensation and blame his underestimate.

What are your plans when your kids finish elementary school? Will you move out of Milwaukee? I suspect remodeling your existing house might be a decent option if that is the case. If you will stay all through HS, you might want to trade up.

Hire a contractor if you need to. Your DH is too busy to do this project and it will be a lot of work to get everything done.

[Wisconsin Beth]

Thank you Robert. 

I've tried scoring it and spraying it with assorted things.  I had a ton of help from nieces and they got about 80% of it off.  I got some more off.  What's left is itty bitty bits in hard to reach spots or just super stubborn spots.  Or both. 

He said he told them he's hoping to have this project done by the 17th.  Definitely by Labor Day.  Based on last night's effort, Labor Day is going to be closer to the mark. 

Yeah, I told him hiring help to get some of this done might happen. 

It's going to be a LONG election season in our household too. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Well, DH's company is willing to pay him $1K for this project, which is about 40 hours of work.  DH thinks that works out to about his regular pay.  He's salaried so he doesn't get OT.  AFter taxes, I expect it to be about $600 or so.  I'm going to suggest to DH that we use it to cover our anniversary trip, wherever he wants to go.  Our 11th anniversary is early Oct. and the last couple of years we've tried to do something fun with the kids, in addition to a meal for us out - parent teacher conferences hit around it too, so we leave the kids at grandparents house while we do the conferences and then go have dinner or a drink afterwards.  If he doesn't want to do that, it's not a problem.  He may already have thoughts on how to spend it.  He does tend to think of bonuses as his money.  The problem with that is that I don't GET bonuses, ever.  And since we do joint accounts, my OT gets dumped into regular checking.  Anyway, that's not a problem right now. 

WE're going to see the Minion movie this weekend, all 4 of us.  State Fair started a couple of days ago and we'd like to do that as a family too.  But we'll see.  I may end up taking the kids myself, if he's got to work on the project.

[The Captain]

Aug 7, 2015 13:55:48 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

Well, DH's company is willing to pay him $1K for this project, which is about 40 hours of work.  DH thinks that works out to about his regular pay.  He's salaried so he doesn't get OT.  AFter taxes, I expect it to be about $600 or so.  I'm going to suggest to DH that we use it to cover our anniversary trip, wherever he wants to go.  Our 11th anniversary is early Oct. and the last couple of years we've tried to do something fun with the kids, in addition to a meal for us out - parent teacher conferences hit around it too, so we leave the kids at grandparents house while we do the conferences and then go have dinner or a drink afterwards.  If he doesn't want to do that, it's not a problem.  He may already have thoughts on how to spend it.  He does tend to think of bonuses as his money.  The problem with that is that I don't GET bonuses, ever.  And since we do joint accounts, my OT gets dumped into regular checking.  Anyway, that's not a problem right now. 

WE're going to see the Minion movie this weekend, all 4 of us.  State Fair started a couple of days ago and we'd like to do that as a family too.  But we'll see.  I may end up taking the kids myself, if he's got to work on the project.

Bring something to read and earplugs.  You will thank me for this.

[Wisconsin Beth]

snort.  And how are you doing with Girl Genius? 

Shaun the Sheep is the next movie for us to see. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Oh and for the record, I dropped about 20 lbs total on the "gall bladder blow up" diet earlier this year.  I want to keep losing weight so I reactivated my account on myfitnesspal.com.  I was cheating on proboards on their forums today and stumbled into a discussion on how did you pick your goal weight.  Well several people said by going for a spot in their BMI range.  My goal is the weight I felt physically best at, which is 150.  So I got curious and hit a calculate your BMI thing.  I'm a fraction under the topmost weight for "overweight" instead of obese. 

My goal weight puts me at top of "normal weight"  We'll see what happens.  I'm down 2 lbs in the last month and honestly, I'm not doing very much exercising, certainly not a regular exercise on a regular basis.  That will start once the kids are back in school and I'm back on 630-3pms.  I can pick up the kids and we can all go to the gym and be done by dinner time.  If I go now, we're STARTING my gym time at dinner time.  It screws up the timing for our evenings, esp. as we start bedtime around 7pm. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

I'm taking 3 kids to Door Co. tomorrow to see the Perseid shower.  Coming home Thursday afternoon.  Bringing along DD's best friend too, so I'll have 3 kids. 

I'm feeling slightly guilty - I assumed the other Mom wouldn't want to go.  Except she did but had plans.  Well, those plans changed and now she's free, except she's on puppy duty.  Having her bring the dog along wouldn't be much of an issue but sleeping arrangements are tight and I don't wanna juggle them.  But I'm feeling kind of guilty/selfish for not being willing to juggle them. 

Right now, plans are to have the 2 girls on the pullout bed in the front and me and Cabe in the real bed in the back. 

If other mom comes, we'd either have to stick her and her DD in the real bed and me and my 2 in the pullout bed and a cot (which means it's damn near impossible to get out in the middle of the night) OR I set up air mattresses in the screen tent.  I know damn well the kids aren't going to stay all night in the screen tent without an adult present.  And if the girls are out there, Cabe's going to want to be out there.  Which means 4 of us are out there and only 1 inside.  And the other parents have rules about sleepovers with boys.  A younger brother sleeping in his own room or with his mom is ok.  3 kids in a screen tent, I'm assuming is not going to fly. 

And DD is mostly looking forward to sharing the bed with her friend. 

I told the mom we'd get her up there next year. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

The meteors worked out ok, all in all.  DDs bff got carsick on the way up.  Thankfully, she warned me and I was able to pull into a parking lot, where she puked. 

But the kids all saw several meteors and satellites before we called it quits around 10pm on Wed. night. 

I missed having another adult around for pool time.  Because when 1 kid wanted to go to the bathroom the other 2 didn't.  So I ended up having them sit on the steps into the pool and splash their feet while I hustled the other kid to the potty.  And a couple of times, I asked other parents/grandparents if they were ok keeping an eye on the other 2 while I hustled the 3rd to the bathroom. 

I missed DH during the meteor shower.  IT brought back fond memories from when we were dating.  So that's a good thing. 

I'm taking DD and DS back up there tonight, which is a 24 hrs. turnaround.  My parents are up there and the kids are looking forward to pool time again.  And smores, which we didn't get around to doing.  

And I think I'm gaining a bit more confidence in doing stuff on my own again.  The last 7-10 years have knocked a lot of that out of me.  It's good to be getting it back, even though I didn't realize it was missing until now. 

DH has to work so he wouldn't be home/available much anyway. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Kids, Grandma and I saw a few more meteors and at least 10 satellites in the 10-15 minutes they were willing to watch on Sunday night.  They wanted to see them with Grandma.    Then they got cold and bored so we headed back to the trailer. 

I tagged the photos I took of the first trip up there.  Keira's friends Mom asked me to do it, so her family and friends could see the photos.  I only tagged her though.  I don't like tagging my kids.  I don't object if someone else tags them in their photos though.  I just don't do it - in part it's laziness and in part not sure what the future is going to bring. 

DH's aunts were in town Sunday night so after we got back, he ran the kids over to his Mom's and they stayed there for an hour or so; so he could talk to them and they could see/meet the kids.  They don't live in town and don't get here very much so MIL wanted to make sure the kids were there.  I gotta admit, it was nice to have the house to myself and decompress a bit.   

[Wisconsin Beth]

I am so tired lately.  And discouraged.  And frustrated. 

With work, the kids, the house, DH, basically, just about everything.

I know this stuff cycles around and all but it's just hard when you're in the middle of it, staring/hearing at everyone's needs and wondering when (or if) someone will help you will your needs. 

[anciana]

Beth, sorry to hear about all the frustration. You have a lot on your plate, you know that, and you know that won't change today or tomorrow. Please, take care of yourself as you go about your day taking care of everyone and everything else. I can't tell you how many times I hear people say that we need to do what we need to do for ourselves first but we keep on putting our needs last. Until the day inevitably comes again and we're feeling overwhelmed or frustrated and just plain tired.

Stop, take a breath and look around. You know what you need for yourself and how much of it is realistic and possible at the moment. When all else fails, I resort to chocolate  

[Wisconsin Beth]

LOL.  I said fuck it to my diet the last 36 hours.  A small break from it isn't going to make or break my weight.  I'm down like 27 lbs from March, the gall bladder thing is, overall, responsible for 20lbs of it.  I start going back to the gym next week anyway. 

My parents are both coming with me on Friday to work on the land up North.  Plan is to pack my minivan with the patio table from home, at least 1 lawn mower and some tools.  Gonna mow the area where the tents go, the areas we want clear for the kids to play in, the fire pit and the path to the tree line (which sadly goes though the raspberry/blackberry brambles).  Then we're gonna buy some cheap patio block and lay it around the fire pit and the area where the table is going to go.  And I want to buy a cheap but sturdy little storage bin/unit to keep some tools (shovel, maybe and ax and the splitter, that kind of thing) and camping gear (tarps, the carpets we use to try to keep the dirt down, etc.) in. 

There's no water or power on the land either.  WE're going to camp there Labor DAy weekend. 

[murphath]

Re your house projects:

If it makes you feel any better, we were never able financially to update the house while raising kids. They are definitely expensive little critters. Still, I'm sure we could have made some better financial decisions to free up some money but what's done is done. Camping was our vacation every year, too.

Fast forward to now. I retired in 2010 and faced the daunting tasks of: repairing a wooden fence (the next door neighbor's ivy was destroying it--we cut it back on our side but the weight of the ivy on her side caused it to lean very heavily in one direction; replace a redwood retaining wall (160 feet in length), paint the outside of the house, new roof, new windows, remove popcorn ceiling and retexture/prime/paint, prime/paint all walls; strip,prime and paint all the cabinets in kitchen and baths; remove carpeting and install laminate flooring. This all started one afternoon when I told my DH that we needed to replace the carpet. I then said, you know, I may as well start with the ceiling and work my way down. I literally took a stool and a spray bottle and small scraper and started removing the popcorn--just to see what it looked like. I didn't want to make any of this work a "chore". It was just something I was going to do for an hour or two each day. When I got tired of it, I stopped. That was key.  I still have to remove the interior doors and repaint them; get new kitchen counter tops and appliances; retile master shower and floor, etc., but my enthusiasm has waned after 5 years of reno work.  I think Oct. may be a good time to get back in the mood.

So, perhaps you can start by listing the projects you would like to see done in your home and prioritize them, i.e. don't replace flooring until you paint ceilings/walls etc.

If you are unable to do the work yourself because of time/talent constraints, still make a list and then get some quotes. If the bathroom is #1, knowing the cost is key. My SIL just redid her bathroom shower/toilet area and it cost $6,000. That's here in Calif. where everything is more expensive. Just the same, if the cost is $xx, then put some money each pay period toward that amount. And keep working down the list.

We did save so much money by doing most of the work ourselves. I had the flooring installed because I knew they were going to have to do some leveling of our concrete subfloor. Home Depot has great promos all the time: the one we got for the downstairs was like $299 basic installation for up to 1,000 sq ft. We ended up paying @ $1,200 because of the floor prep they had to do but it was still a good deal.  For everything listed, I believe we've spent @ $35,000.

I think having a list will help you feel a lot better. Keep it on the fridge so it's visual for everyone to see. Then check off the projects as they get done.  

I must admit that I do feel a sense of accomplishment for all the work I've done.  I say "I" because DH is not handy at all and hates doing this kind of stuff.  I used to make my own clothes growing up so I considered a project nothing more than a bigger sewing project.  The concept is the same--just take it step by step and make sure you "iron" as you go along.  Oh, and put your favorite music on while working!

[murphath]

I forgot to add that I did NOT do the new roof. Hired that one out.

[anciana]

Hi Beth, how was your holiday weekend? Did you, guys, end up going camping? I was thinking of you and hoping you got to relax a bit here and there.

[Wisconsin Beth]

We did go camping.  We packed it in a day early because we really didn't want to pack up in the rain on Monday.  And the flies were Godawful.  Add in hot and little to no shade and there you have my weekend.    Parts of it were good, parts sucked.  I actually walked out on DH and the kids at one point.  Just couldn't take it and stomped off for a walk.  Texted to say I was walking to the bridge to cool down.  Keira was really upset about me doing that I guess.  Both kids met me with hugs and "we love yous" when I got back.  H said that he didn't prompt them to do that.  I was only gone about 20 minutes.  Told him that parenting sucked and marriage wasn't all it was cracked up to be either.  He asked if we needed to see my therapist.  The 'we' is important.  But I'm not sure it's going to solve what I think is the basic problems - 1. he doesn't hear/listen to me and 2. he doesn't follow though when he does hear/listen.    But it's starting to spill over the kids.  He completely didn't hear DD asking for a drink last night.  This about 10-15 minutes after I'd asked him to help me get them dinner; he didn't hear me and I pointed out that I'd asked for help and gotten no help or any response.  He said he didn't hear me.  Or her. 

There's some feedback on the decluttering thread too because I was venting there last week.  I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the advice there. 

[anciana]

Beth, would you go back to see Liz again? Would she take both of you, or just you without DH?

The facetious part of me wants to say that I am not sure whose problem it is and who really needs therapy: your husband for not being able to hear (is it physical as in hard of hearing, or not being present, being there in the moment, with and for his family) or you because you are the one that his behavior really bothers as I am not seeing anything about him getting upset that he wasn't able to hear his daughter needing a drink or help you with dinner. Grrr...

I am just so upset for you and cannot even imagine how frustrating this must be to deal with all the time And I probably should be saying half the thing I am since I'm grumpy myself these days

If you could see Liz again, I totally would. She helped you a lot along the way, and she might be able to do it again, or at least recommend somebody else that could. Good luck!

[Wisconsin Beth]

yeah, I need to see Liz, with or without DH.  This year has sucked majorly (death of a friend, gallbladder, etc.)

There's nothing physically wrong with his hearing. 

[anciana]

Oops, I meant to say that I shouldn't be saying some of these things...

I thought there's probably nothing wrong with his hearing, but figured better to check. I know there is a book about how to talk to kids so they will listen, and listen so the kids will talk. I wish there was one for the adults. Or it could be it's all close enough that it would help

I hear you on a sucky year, with death among the friends and more changes than I cared to undergo with plenty more I really wished happened. I know you also had a hell of a time with your surgery and the trip planned around that time. My experience is that things will go smoothly only in shorter stretches so I need to learn to enjoy that time when it comes. If we can, at the same time, figure out how to deal with the stress all the other times, it would be great! If I dared to, I would post a question on the kid thread as I know the ladies there don't mind answering questions and offering advice on other issues that pertain to family and relationships   In the mean time all I have left is

 

[bean29]

Beth,

I am sorry you are having a hard time with your family. I don't think it is ever easy with 2 full time jobs and a couple of kids and a house. Let us know if you need a girls night.

I am going over to peek at the decluttering thread.  

[Wisconsin Beth]

Well, I called my health insurance yesterday.  I'm cleared to go see Liz again.  They will provide coverage as long as I stay under 50 minute sessions.  They also confirmed that she's still in network.  Now I need to set up an appt. with her. 

Can I vent about work for a second?  I've worked for my employee, in various job titles and departments since I was 17.  Full time since I was 22 or so.  So I'm vested in the pension fund; I earn 6 weeks vacation per year; I have over 500 hours of sl banked.  And I have time banked in and "old" vacation account due to a change in how we accrue vacation time.  I have comptime banked.  And every employee gets 3 uses of doctor appointment time in 2 hour blocks, sort of a bonus/perk.  You can use 1 hour for an appt. but you can't save that extra hour for a 3 hour appt.  So it makes sense to save those for appts. that will be closer to 2 hours.  So why the frell is damn near everyone asking me why I'm using sick leave instead of the appt. time for my 1 hour dentist appt. today?  Yes, I know what I'm doing.  Thank you VERY much.  I'm saving my "freebies" for when I need 2 damn hours, which will be in a couple of weeks. 

Now I"m going to go fight with excel.  <Beth goes off muttering about the damn stupidity of herself and excel>

[Wisconsin Beth]

I think I broke Cabe's Kindle Jr. the other night.  He was playing on his Kindle and I was reading on mine.  I put my down, told him it was time to snuggle and he handed his over.  Screen was fine then.  I sort of flailed around trying to get it on the shelf by his bed.  30 minutes later, I was gathering up both Kindles to leave and realized that his screen was cracked, badly.  Like screen bits falling out badly.  I didn't hear anything crack either.  But I was the last one to touch it and I was the one trying to get it in the bookshelf so I'll take the blame.  I feel bad but am really grateful for the 2 year replacement policy the kids' Kindle Jrs. came with.  Cabe's first Kindle Jr. failed a couple months after he got it, there was some power issue with it.  The process was really simple.  So I've asked DH to take care of it. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

and yet at the same time....

DH wants to go back up North to the land.  I admit, I probably put it into his head because I admitted to my Mom the day after we got home that I'd like to get back up there, after a frost kills off the bugs.  This was at a big family thing and DH heard and was really shocked because it was hot and buggy.  I explained that due to assorted obligations, we'd be looking at early Oct. and I didn't think that was feasible. 

But he wants to do this and I'm not unwilling.  So he started researching resorts up there, sort of quietly because I was willing to camp there.  We've got lots of blankets and there's a HUGE amount of firewood near the fire pit already.  But I was sort of assuming temps in the 50s at night.  Turns out it's more likely to be temps in the 30s at night.  So tenting is out.  Renting a trailer probably isn't a hugely good idea either.  Which leaves resort/hotel. 

Last weekend, it occurred to me that maybe he'd rather invite his parents to do this with us rather than the waterpark.  He LOVED the idea.  9-26 was MIL's b-day.  We took MIL and FIL out for dinner and brought this up with them.  They too loved the idea.  And said yes, they'd go.  On the 27th, we were with his parents and brother and MIL asked about it.  I deferred to DH because he's the one doing the research and sent him inside to talk to them and his brother (DH and I had talked slightly about his brother and family coming along.  I wanted to make sure DH had a plan for that, one way or another.)  And MIL was still excited and happy.  So that evening we booked a 3 bedroom cabin for the weekend we're going.  Turns out the kids are off of school that Friday.  It's working out great. 

Yesterday, I was home sick.  My work sick leave policy is that I need to remain in the house except for doctor visits, including evening hours.  So DH called him Mom to see if she could pick up the kids after school and either drop them off at our house or keep them until DH could get them (we'd used my Mom on Tuesday since I left work in the middle of the day) and he called me to say that a. she could pick up the kids and b. they couldn't go.  We were both really surprised at this but DH said he'd talk to her when he picked up the kids and see what he could figure out. 

He thinks his Mom doesn't want to deal with the headache of getting them ready.  His Dad's not real mobile and they're both in a lot of pain lately so it would fall on them.  Their car needs an oil change and they don't want to put the miles on it were brought up too.  And the shortness of the stay (Friday afternoon to Sun. am) may have been brought up too.  And then MIL offered to pay the difference between a 2 room cabin and a 3 room cabin (which I find slightly insulting but that's on me.)  In short, DH thinks his Dad would go in a heartbeat but his Mom is the one saying "No." and his Dad is going along with it. 

DH is kinda bummed about it.  But did suggest that I invite my parents to come.  So I mentioned it to Mom this morning and she and Dad are going to talk about it.  They would have to be home Sunday morning so I think they'd be coming up Friday and then heading back Sat. afternoon, with time to visit some of Dad's relatives built in as he's got some cousins less than 50 miles from there.  IF they come.

So, long story short, I'm both bummed and happy about it.  Because while I want DH and the kids to have memories of doing vacation type stuff with his parents; his parents drive me nuts for extended periods of time.  Which, in fairness to DH, is the same for him and my parents. 

[bean29]

I'm hoping your MIL doesn't change her mind about going and decide to go now that your parents are going.

This is Par for the course with my MIL.  We booked tickets for DH's parents to go with us to Georgia about 6 years ago, with his mother saying she wasn't going until a day or two before we were due to leave.  We had so much fun on that trip, I am so glad we did it.  We used to take FIL along to different places and sometimes MIL would decide to come along, and others she would be happy to stay home. 

This past summer one of my BIL's offered to drive the in-laws to Georgia.  Trip was discussed and planned in about a week but surprise, my in-laws went.  (DH has two brothers living in GA).  FIL has health issues now, so that was probably the last long trip they will take.

It should be a beautiful drive with fall color nearly at it's peak. I envy you that. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Lord, that's all we need.  If she does, DH gets to deal with her. 

However MIL and FIL are apparently happy to do this next summer.  So we'll try again then, I guess. 

She may very well bail again next summer when she learns it's still going to be a long weekend and not 2 weeks like they used to do.  They used to rent a cabin near Phillips for 2 weeks every summer because FIL had family there.  They something seem to think/feel that a long weekend isn't worth the effort for going up North.  I think they're wrong but hey, different strokes and all that. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

And yeah, the color should be good.  My parents are closing their trailer in Door Co. this weekend, since there was frost up there, I'm hoping they get some good color too. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

Ok, my parents are joining us for Friday night and leaving Sat, probably noonish.  Dad, as expected, wants to visit his family in that area.  He's overriding Mom on that.  In Mom's defense, she didn't really think about it and didn't say no very hard.  If they go on Sat. I may take the kids and go with them for a bit to show off the kids and stuff.  We'll see. 

DH is dealing with the fact that my parents are perfectly willing to drive 4 hours (more or less) one way to spend 1 night with us and his parents aren't.  We know there are more reasons than that but when push comes to shove, that's what it feels like.   

Mom also brought up that if my ILs change their mind, she and Dad are perfectly happy to back out and let them go.  I didn't bring that up at all, she did. 

[Wisconsin Beth]

We had parent teacher conferences last night for both kids. Went really well.

C met the benchmarks for everything and did better than some of the other kids in his classroom. Yay! Teacher is NOT worried about him at all. She thinks his handwriting is acceptable for the early part of K5 and isn't worried about his letter recognition, which was reassuring because the dcp/preschool he attended was always carping on his writing (or lack thereof) and his letter/number recognition. K is teaching him addition and subtraction, which REALLY surprised the teacher - but when they're talking/playing quietly and not fighting, I am NOT involving myself.

We also met with C's speech therapy teacher. She said he's doing great and that he's starting to speak up more. Her assessment in K4 spring conferences was that he was going to need another year and she confirmed that, also ran down the timeline for redoing the IEP thing which I was grateful for. She's bummed (from a professional point of view) about all her K5 kids losing their front teeth because their tongues don't know when to stop and it's hard to work on certain sounds when you're missing your front teeth... C is missing both top front teeth right now.

And EVERYONE commented on C's scarf. Last weekend was colder and the kids wanted hats and mittens for outdoors so I dug up the box. C found his scarf from last year. He's insisting on taking it to school. But the teachers say he's wearing it constantly around school, sometimes like a fashion model.

K's teacher said that K is really smart. Doing awesome on just about everything. The teacher is holding a couple of sessions for how they're teaching math, which she skimmed over for us as we won't be able to make the classes. She's going to send a packet home too. I wish DH would be able to attend - he's the math major and I think he'll have more issues with it than I will but the timing is just awful for both of us. We did talk about K's reading because she'll have to do 3 book reports every month. Basically, let her read anything she wants to read that's not a baby book. If that's earthquakes (a current topic of interest) fine by the teacher. She showed some of the books they're reading in class, so I've got a rough sense of minimal amount of text on a page that K should have, which helps me.

[Wisconsin Beth]

After the conferences, DH and I went out for dinner to what's become our "go to" place.  Close by, reasonable enough prices, good food and drink. 

Ok, we were there in late June/early July because we talked with our waiter about the Ren Faire, which was just starting up.  No problems. 

We were there sometime in July/August.  I commented on the menu changing and was told it was a new menu.  We had an appetizer that was odd. 

We were there last night.  New menu again.  Odd app no longer on the menu and several other apps are gone. 

DH is down to 1 meal he can eat there, off the gluten free menu.  Damn near everything else has dairy in it, unless he wants a burger with no bun*.    So until the next menu change, we won't be eating there.  Bummer.  On the way out, I did point it out to the person standing at the desk.  And I know, it's not their problem that DH has dairy issues and their don't have to cater to PITA customers with multiple food issues. 

* there are lots of places around here where he can get a burger with no bun.  But if we're going out for burgers and he's with me/us, we're probably going to Stack'd, where they do awesome burgers and DO have the gluten free buns.  If he's not with me and the kids, we're probably at Culver's.