Suicide

[roygrip]

Today I arise with a new outlook, we celebrate the good they have done!

[kimber45]

(((((hugs)))))) Roy

[Opti]

Sorry Roy, there are always a lot of exits around the holidays whether dramatically intentional or not. (Suicide versus non suicidal deaths.)

I like you are choosing to celebrate their lives. Like the Dalai Lama I grieve less for the death than some might as there's probably a new birth/death combo in both of their futures.

[bean29]

toomuch reality, I am so sorry for your loss and for people blaming you. While some people can find no good reason or explanation for suicide, your description of what your boyfriend was living with does explain why he decided suicide was the best option for him, and why you decided not to intervene. I am not sure I would have made any different decision in a similar situation.


He was in great physical pain, not emotional pain. It is the people that have emotional pain that we hope we can change the outcome for.
I am sorry, I must have totally missed when my thread was reopened.

Roygrip...I am sorry for your losses. I hope you have someone to help you through this. If not we here at the Not MSN Money Boards will be here for you.

[toomuchreality]

Dec 12, 2011 7:22:34 GMT -5 roygrip said:

Today I arise with a new outlook, we celebrate the good they have done!

Celebrate their lives, instead of mourning their deaths. That is the best gift/tribute you could give, and honor them the most.

So sorry for your losses roy. May they now know, and feel true peace.

I owe you one...

[roygrip]

TMR, I just now came out of my grief enough to read your story. I had a friend who went thru something very similar with a brother. My hats off to you. I agree with you, (though in somes eyes.....) That's on then. Quality of life is the key.
My own father, an outdoorsman, scientist, sailor, world traveler was hit with Lymphoma in his late 80's, by the time it was over he was 87 pds in a hospital bed with out the ability to care for himself. He was miserable, you could see it, hear it. Is it right for medical science to keep people around, when their choice would b e to move on?
I understand your choice. Blessings

[roygrip]

Thank you Bean! Thank God for my 10plus years of sobriety, I'm dealing OK with the losses. Very sad, but I see it for what it is. Thank you.

[roygrip]

Kimber and Giftist, thank you as well. Better we celebrate their life.

[gavinsnana]

This is just so sad and I am so sorry to hear this. Thoughts and prayers to you.

[kimber45]

Better we celebrate their life.

Yes, I agree. DH and I have talked of this often. I know how he feels and what needs to be done should that time come.

"Is it right for medical science to keep people around, when their choice would b e to move on?" IMO, NO.

[toomuchreality]

Dec 14, 2011 8:02:23 GMT -5 roygrip said:

TMR, I just now came out of my grief enough to read your story. I had a friend who went thru something very similar with a brother. My hats off to you. I agree with you, (though in somes eyes.....) That's on then. Quality of life is the key.
My own father, an outdoorsman, scientist, sailor, world traveler was hit with Lymphoma in his late 80's, by the time it was over he was 87 pds in a hospital bed with out the ability to care for himself. He was miserable, you could see it, hear it. Is it right for medical science to keep people around, when their choice would b e to move on?
I understand your choice. Blessings

Thank you so much roy, back at'cha! It means a lot to me, to hear you say that.
It is the hardest thing I've ever done. Not the kind of thing you take lightly. I loved him enough to want to do that for him. It still breaks my heart that he is gone. I think it always will.



It must have devastated your father to be in that kind of condition, after being so active, and such a go getter all those years. And been devastating for you to see him that way, as well.


It strikes me as odd, that when you euthanize a pet, you're doing the 'right' thing. You are thinking of what's best for them. Putting their needs first; being humane. Yet when it comes to humans, it makes you (me) a some sort of monster, for loving, and caring enough to not want him to be alone during his final moments. I hope I'm not alone during my final moments, I would prefer to know/feel like I was loved and cared about. I want to feel loved, not just hear the sound of technology keeping my body alive.

I understand that others may not want the same thing(s) I do, and that's okay. I don't want or need to be just like everyone else. What I want, and need to be, is real/me.
I'm okay with/being me. That's what matters.

I hope you are/will always be happy being you. I wish you all the best!

[roygrip]

Dec 15, 2011 15:30:52 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Dec 14, 2011 8:02:23 GMT -5 roygrip said:

TMR, I just now came out of my grief enough to read your story. I had a friend who went thru something very similar with a brother. My hats off to you. I agree with you, (though in somes eyes.....) That's on then. Quality of life is the key.
My own father, an outdoorsman, scientist, sailor, world traveler was hit with Lymphoma in his late 80's, by the time it was over he was 87 pds in a hospital bed with out the ability to care for himself. He was miserable, you could see it, hear it. Is it right for medical science to keep people around, when their choice would b e to move on?
I understand your choice. Blessings

Thank you so much roy, back at'cha! It means a lot to me, to hear you say that.
It is the hardest thing I've ever done. Not the kind of thing you take lightly. I loved him enough to want to do that for him. It still breaks my heart that he is gone. I think it always will.



It must have devastated your father to be in that kind of condition, after being so active, and such a go getter all those years. And been devastating for you to see him that way, as well.


It strikes me as odd, that when you euthanize a pet, you're doing the 'right' thing. You are thinking of what's best for them. Putting their needs first; being humane. Yet when it comes to humans, it makes you (me) a some sort of monster, for loving, and caring enough to not want him to be alone during his final moments. I hope I'm not alone during my final moments, I would prefer to know/feel like I was loved and cared about. I want to feel loved, not just hear the sound of technology keeping my body alive.

I understand that others may not want the same thing(s) I do, and that's okay. I don't want or need to be just like everyone else. What I want, and need to be, is real/me.
I'm okay with/being me. That's what matters.

I hope you are/will always be happy being you. I wish you all the best!

That's a very good analogy, that I hadn't even touched on. It is true, how with our pets "we're doing the right thing". I remember my father (who was supper intelligent 200 IQ cvlub/Mensa) telling the Dr "What right do you have to play God? I'm miserable like this, please just let me go!" You take quality of life from someone, and what do you have?
Exactly..... the sound of technology. There comes a point when the choice needs to be ours.
May you always find peace as well

[toomuchreality]

Dec 16, 2011 8:07:31 GMT -5 roygrip said:

Dec 15, 2011 15:30:52 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

Thank you so much roy, back at'cha! It means a lot to me, to hear you say that.
It is the hardest thing I've ever done. Not the kind of thing you take lightly. I loved him enough to want to do that for him. It still breaks my heart that he is gone. I think it always will.



It must have devastated your father to be in that kind of condition, after being so active, and such a go getter all those years. And been devastating for you to see him that way, as well.


It strikes me as odd, that when you euthanize a pet, you're doing the 'right' thing. You are thinking of what's best for them. Putting their needs first; being humane. Yet when it comes to humans, it makes you (me) a some sort of monster, for loving, and caring enough to not want him to be alone during his final moments. I hope I'm not alone during my final moments, I would prefer to know/feel like I was loved and cared about. I want to feel loved, not just hear the sound of technology keeping my body alive.

I understand that others may not want the same thing(s) I do, and that's okay. I don't want or need to be just like everyone else. What I want, and need to be, is real/me.
I'm okay with/being me. That's what matters.

I hope you are/will always be happy being you. I wish you all the best!

That's a very good analogy, that I hadn't even touched on. It is true, how with our pets "we're doing the right thing". I remember my father (who was supper intelligent 200 IQ cvlub/Mensa) telling the Dr "What right do you have to play God? I'm miserable like this, please just let me go!" You take quality of life from someone, and what do you have?
Exactly..... the sound of technology. There comes a point when the choice needs to be ours.
May you always find peace as well

- -


I don't want to out live my life.
I say My life, My body, My choice. -you go girl! (you too roy!) ;D

[Artemis Windsong]

usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/04/10/11118720-family-bullying-by-wolf-pack-led-to-texas-teens-suicide?lite

Bullied into a suicide, again. My condolences to the family and friends. The bullies do this to see the hurt look on a persons face, in their eyes and how they walk. An apology from a bully does not cover the damage.

[Artemis Windsong]

Did the victim get in trouble for mashing the bully? Usually that's what happens is the bully starts yelling bully if the vic retaliates or fights back.

Just because people are adults doesn't mean they don't continue to bully. They just get better at it.