Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 21, 2015 12:04:30 GMT -5
Yah, is that a level? Are you sure?
it's like the best damn level ever if the giver knows what to do. ok thanks, I'll be sure to give my consent.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Oct 21, 2015 12:21:32 GMT -5
Okay, folks. We're getting a little close to the line here. Please remember, it's not necessary to get explicit here; nor, is it necessary to discuss the different "levels." Let's keep it within the bounds of very conservative PG-13. Thanks.
mmhmm, Administrator
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 21, 2015 12:43:52 GMT -5
Bloody hell! If anything affirmative consent would help the huge (said very sarcastically) number of men falsely accused. Now their response wouldn't be "but she didn't say no!" It would instead be "I asked her throughout the encounter if she was ok/wanted to stop/etc" Why does that help them? Because saying it can still be rape if the person doesn't say no for various reasons. The victim not saying no does not mean a rape didn't occur. yeah, actually it helps no one in that regard. If it's just a verbal contract, it does nothing to mitigate the "he said/she said" problem because one or both parties could easily lie. So on that front, having this rule is pretty pointless. Again, I think the purpose is to make you pause for a few seconds to ensure you understand fully what's about to go down. If I were a guy and had sex with a very active but drunk participant who regretted it the next day and tried to claim "no consent" I would damn well be saying "I asked and she said yes".....
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 21, 2015 12:44:51 GMT -5
yeah, actually it helps no one in that regard. If it's just a verbal contract, it does nothing to mitigate the "he said/she said" problem because one or both parties could easily lie. So on that front, having this rule is pretty pointless. Again, I think the purpose is to make you pause for a few seconds to ensure you understand fully what's about to go down. If I were a guy and had sex with a very active but drunk participant who regretted it the next day and tried to claim "no consent" I would damn well be saying "I asked and she said yes"..... You'd make a good frat guy or jock.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 21, 2015 12:46:27 GMT -5
If I were a guy and had sex with a very active but drunk participant who regretted it the next day and tried to claim "no consent" I would damn well be saying "I asked and she said yes"..... You'd make a good frat guy or jock. Well I DO like to drink....
but in all seriousness, what guy WOULDNT say she said yes??
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Oct 21, 2015 12:54:08 GMT -5
I don't think this "law" is going to help women at all. If nothing else, it will create more resentment and animosity and anger from men.
Actually, I'll rephrase it - it will not help any gender and it will certainly not decrease number of rapes.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 21, 2015 12:54:54 GMT -5
I don't think this "law" is going to help women at all. If nothing else, it will create more resentment and animosity and anger from men. Actually, I'll rephrase it - it will not help any gender and it will certainly not decrease number of rapes. what would?
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Oct 21, 2015 12:55:42 GMT -5
... If I were a guy and had sex with a very active but drunk participant who regretted it the next day and tried to claim "no consent" I would damn well be saying "I asked and she said yes"..... Or if there were witnesses that had her draped all over me, I would be saying "She asked and I said yes".
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Oct 21, 2015 13:02:09 GMT -5
I don't think this "law" is going to help women at all. If nothing else, it will create more resentment and animosity and anger from men. Actually, I'll rephrase it - it will not help any gender and it will certainly not decrease number of rapes. what would? I don't know.....education? Being raised a certain way. From the very early age.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 21, 2015 13:03:28 GMT -5
I don't know.....education? Being raised a certain way. From the very early age. so... something similar to this?
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Oct 21, 2015 13:10:45 GMT -5
You'd make a good frat guy or jock. Well I DO like to drink....
but in all seriousness, what guy WOULDNT say she said yes??
One who didn't take advantage of the situation. I'd like to think there are some out there who wouldn't.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 21, 2015 13:38:42 GMT -5
Well I DO like to drink....
but in all seriousness, what guy WOULDNT say she said yes??
One who didn't take advantage of the situation. I'd like to think there are some out there who wouldn't. Both kids are drunk....she regrets it and says she never actually said yes. Sorry, that is not him taking advantage of the situation.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 21, 2015 13:40:58 GMT -5
... If I were a guy and had sex with a very active but drunk participant who regretted it the next day and tried to claim "no consent" I would damn well be saying "I asked and she said yes"..... Or if there were witnesses that had her draped all over me, I would be saying "She asked and I said yes". But she was drunk...the fact that she was draped all over you clearly means nothing...poor little thing can't be held responsible for her drunken escapade...but for some reason we hold the drunk guy responsible for both his AND her actions. And THAT is what I find so offensive.
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973beachbum
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Post by 973beachbum on Oct 21, 2015 13:43:22 GMT -5
This isn't new people.
The whole part about how no means no is out, is because that was the way it was originally worded in the 80's on college campuses. There were all the same arguments as here and guess what? Everyone moved on and there was good that came from it. Kids still managed to have sex. They just learned not to take silence as a yes. Most especially with drunks.
My gut hunch says that if someone can't talk to someone then they sure as hell shouldn't be doing anything as intimate as a sexual act with them.
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Oct 21, 2015 13:54:59 GMT -5
Or if there were witnesses that had her draped all over me, I would be saying "She asked and I said yes". But she was drunk...the fact that she was draped all over you clearly means nothing...poor little thing can't be held responsible for her drunken escapade...but for some reason we hold the drunk guy responsible for both his AND her actions. And THAT is what I find so offensive.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Oct 21, 2015 14:03:00 GMT -5
One who didn't take advantage of the situation. I'd like to think there are some out there who wouldn't. Both kids are drunk....she regrets it and says she never actually said yes. Sorry, that is not him taking advantage of the situation. Let's pretend you're at a party and some guy you know is there and he's plastered and he's all over you. You're probably going to say something like "you're drunk Brian, lay off," right? You're not going to guide him to the back room since he's an easy lay. I'd expect the reverse if I were the drunk girl at the party. Luckily, I've always hung out with a better class of people.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Oct 21, 2015 14:07:08 GMT -5
I don't know.....education? Being raised a certain way. From the very early age. so... something similar to this? similar to what?
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Oct 21, 2015 14:14:56 GMT -5
so... something similar to this? similar to what? similar to what is happening with this thread. the post in the OP was about highschoolers learning what yes means yes is. New school polices will mean new PSAs. Education. Having kids think about it at an earlier age. everything you could ever want.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 21, 2015 14:30:06 GMT -5
One who didn't take advantage of the situation. I'd like to think there are some out there who wouldn't. Both kids are drunk....she regrets it and says she never actually said yes. Sorry, that is not him taking advantage of the situation. Exactly. If both are drunk, then either BOTH are "guilty" or NEITHER are.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Oct 21, 2015 18:43:17 GMT -5
Both kids are drunk....she regrets it and says she never actually said yes. Sorry, that is not him taking advantage of the situation. Let's pretend you're at a party and some guy you know is there and he's plastered and he's all over you. You're probably going to say something like "you're drunk Brian, lay off," right? You're not going to guide him to the back room since he's an easy lay. I'd expect the reverse if I were the drunk girl at the party. Luckily, I've always hung out with a better class of people. And if Im just as plastered and go for it? That means I have no class?
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Oct 21, 2015 19:07:21 GMT -5
Both kids are drunk....she regrets it and says she never actually said yes. Sorry, that is not him taking advantage of the situation. Let's pretend you're at a party and some guy you know is there and he's plastered and he's all over you. You're probably going to say something like "you're drunk Brian, lay off," right? You're not going to guide him to the back room since he's an easy lay. I'd expect the reverse if I were the drunk girl at the party. Luckily, I've always hung out with a better class of people. So a female chooses to get drunk and comes on to a guy. The guy should tell her no in spite of the fact she wants to have sex because he did not have to work hard to convince her to have sex with him?
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