Feng Shui and Money

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #536 - 01/16/09 10:43 PM

T-bird

I reread ... if that square is omitted, you can artificially "square it off" with a plant or a wind chime or a garden light (maybe a small solar light), something like that.

Keriamon, help! LOL

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T-Bird_Money
Message #537 - 01/16/09 10:44 PM

hey 2007dh,

When applying the bagua....

do you put the black career at the front door or north?

I've heard both ways!

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2007debtheaven
Message #538 - 01/16/09 11:04 PM

From the sites I've seen, the black is the front of the house.

Like I tell DH, I don't know me no north, if I did I'd be a compass, lol.

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2007debtheaven
Message #539 - 01/16/09 11:07 PM

More_Money

Debt, you are lucky that you do not have something REALLY serious to keep your mind occupied!

It must be good to be you and be psychic and know all my problems without me even posting about them. How DARE you presume to know about me and my challenges, past and present.

I own a small business that is struggling, along with many others in this economy.

So does my husband. Hence the desire to straighten out the wealth area. His last salary was end of November. We're in mid-January now.

What's with the snarkiness? Is that your idea of "fun"? If so, take it elsewhere, please.

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2007debtheaven
Message #540 - 01/16/09 11:22 PM

T-Bird
I'm having too much trouble trying to figure out the bagua here on this L-shaped house. But I remember seeing a pack of four solar garden lights for pretty cheap (20 or 30, can't remember), and I'm thinking that in the doubt, it's an "easy fix" to "square off" my wonky house.

Also, you need to take all of this with a grain of salt. Apparently L-shaped houses are TERRIBLE in feng-shui land, but we've been here for YEARS. Every time somebody new comes over, as they arrive or leave, they joke about asking us how much we want for the house so they can buy it from us. So L-shape or not, we're obviously doing something right, lol.

The great thing about Feng-Shui is much of it is common sense (nobody wants to live in clutter, not be able to open doors or drawers, not be able to use a table, etc). For the rest, there are always cheap and easy "cures".

But don't go out and buy anything till Keria chimes in, lol.

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #541 - 01/16/09 11:26 PM

Luckytomebe

Why is your remodel taking so long? Two and a half years seems like a long time to me. Maybe you're doing it yourselves? If so, kudos!

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Heather 2.0
Message #542 - 01/17/09 01:45 AM

2007debtheaven
I know what you mean... I kinda expected a similar response. Living in a "vacation" area is the same as living anywhere else (bills, jobs, problems, etc) - but most of the time you have some perks! Before DH and I met, I was reading up on some real-life experiences of people moving to France, and it didn't sound like a ...smooth... transition... lol. A few years ago, I lived in a "vacation" area but I forgot to appreciate it, until I was moving away. I guess I only wanted to remind you/tell you that I think it's a cool place you live!

I'm not a city girl (despite living a stone's throw from the Nation's capital) but I really imagined living in Paris. Now, it's more of a French countryside type vision. DH hasn't ever been to Europe though, so first I'll have to see if he falls in love there like I did. After that, who knows!

Back to Feng Shui... I think it's an awesome idea to have a consultant come to your house! Please make sure you tell us everything you learn! As for me, while I'm waiting for Keria's next task, I'm going to work on our office this weekend. It's in the Love and Relationships section... DH and I are better than ever, but there's still room for improvement. LOL.

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2007debtheaven
Message #543 - 01/17/09 01:56 AM

Heather, you totally got it. Yes, it's a beautiful city (although we are in the burbs). Once in a blue moon we'll be sailing through central Paris late at night (ie no traffic) and yes, it can still take my breath away, even after 20+ years.

But it doesn't happen often. :-)

Having grown up in NY, the biggest fault Paris has in my book is ... no ocean. Many European capitals are within an hour of a shore, but Paris is totally landlocked.

There is good, and bad, everywhere. We just need to make the best of wherever we are, right?!

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luckytobeme12
Message #544 - 01/17/09 03:27 AM



2007debt,

 

Everything that could have gone wrong, did!  No, I am paying, and paying and paying pros.  I am hopeful that it will be finished by THIS March!

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more_money
Message #545 - 01/17/09 04:01 AM

It must be good to be you and be psychic and know all my problems without me even posting about them. How DARE you presume to know about me and my challenges, past and present.

2007debt,

 

You wax poetic about your son's room.  I thought you were fortunate that is the foremost in your mind to discuss here.

 

I own a small business that is struggling, along with many others in this economy.

So does my husband. Hence the desire to straighten out the wealth area. His last salary was end of November. We're in mid-January now.

What's with the snarkiness? Is that your idea of "fun"? If so, take it elsewhere, please.

         Where is my snarkiness?  LOL!

 

         I don't know what you mean by your husband's last salary was end of November.  Yes, it is mid-January now.  I

         am still holding my own paychecks since December.  I pay everyone else first!  If I have any money left after paying employees,  landlord,    taxes, vendors, and suppliers, then I deposit mine!  I don't get unemployment benefits either if I should go belly up! 

 

         I enjoy this thread.  It is still fun to read.

 

        

         

         

 

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Heather 2.0
Message #546 - 01/17/09 01:58 PM

In the spirit of the positive, supportive thread this has been (unlike many others on this board), might I suggest we ignore the recent addition of the negativity?

Keria - any way to do a Space Clearing of this thread to rid us on the unwanted "clutter"?

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #547 - 01/18/09 12:02 AM

Where is my snarkiness?  LOL!

The newest example is the "waxing poetic" comment. This thread used to be for our "problem corners" until Keria kindly decided to organize it.

         I don't know what you mean by your husband's last salary was end of November.  Yes, it is mid-January now.  I

         am still holding my own paychecks since December.  I pay everyone else first!  If I have any money left after paying employees,  landlord,    taxes, vendors, and suppliers, then I deposit mine!  I don't get unemployment benefits either if I should go belly up! 

Well, you're in exactly the same situation as DH, except that he's held that monthly paycheck since Nov, not December. And he is not entitled to any unemployment benefits either.

How has YOUR progress been going?! If you think this thread is "fun", and you have issues in your life or in your home (because everybody does) why not just join in?! If you find this thread "fun", surely you want to participate rather than just comment. So go for it! If you do, WELCOME!

Otherwise, I'm done with you.

Please, everybody carry on. I'm sorry for the new negativity here and I apologize for having contributed to it. I wanted to answer (I didn't really want to but my mama raised me to be polite) and now I'm done.

ETA: Keria I know this is probably a silly question, but is there any significance or "fallout" if you paint a certain area in another color? I'm guessing not, otherwise anybody interested in Feng Shui would have exactly the same color schemes, LOL.

We are finally redoing our bathroom, it's also in the "wealth section" of our room (since I can only manage the bagua for the individual rooms) and we came to a compromise on the bathroom tile and trim and paint, and long story short, DH wants to paint the dormer ceiling yellow, not blueish-purple as I would have preferred since it's in the "wealth section" and purple is the "wealth" color.

Will we survive?! LOL. Keria, are there any tiny "cures" for that?

 

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luckytobeme12
Message #548 - 01/18/09 01:22 AM



I forgot I also had "more_money" as user name.

 

I thought it was too needy, and not good feng shui!  LOL!

 

I am "luckytobeme12".  I feel good vibes!

 

2007debt,

 

I did not mean to make light of your worries. I too apologize if I had added negative vibes on this thread.

 

There is big progress made on my remodel!  I will have carpet installed in all the bedrooms this week!  To hurry along my feng shui fix, I am going to put a purple orchid in the wealth corner of the room designated to be the office.  (I am making a substitution until my wealth section, the dining room is restored to its original use!  It is storage for kitchen appliances that are waiting to be installed. )  I will hang a painting that I did a few years ago of peach blossoms in the knowledge and self cultivation section.  Mind you, this painting is definitely NOT ready for prime time!  But I am proud of it!  Maybe being in a good mood walking into the room will generate good chi.

 

Part of the reason of the cost overrun and time spent on my remodel is the construction of waterfalls in the entrance.  I have always wanted a waterfall in the house.  So I went for broke!  And broke I am!  I am waiting for the electrician to finish his work so lights will shine on the waterfall.  This is my ultimate feng shui luxury!

 

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2007debtheaven
Message #549 - 01/18/09 01:54 AM

I forgot I also had "more_money" as user name.

I don't really get having another nic that one can forget about, but what do I know? Frankly choosing a nic one doesn't even recognize seems a bit schizophrenic to me, but like I said, what do I know?

So let's just move on, OK, and not ruin this great thread?

I hope it all works out for you.

ETA: I appreciate your apology, lol.

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T-Bird_Money
Message #550 - 01/18/09 02:17 AM

We are finally redoing our bathroom, it's also in the "wealth section" of our room (since I can only manage the bagua for the individual rooms) and we came to a compromise on the bathroom tile and trim and paint, and long story short, DH wants to paint the dormer ceiling yellow, not blueish-purple as I would have preferred since it's in the "wealth section" and purple is the "wealth" color.

Someone told me that the toilet in the wealth area flushes your money down the toilet!

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Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #551 - 01/18/09 04:04 AM



I have been lurking at this thread for a week now. I find Fueng Shui to be very interesting. I have  done some cleaning and recently got good news about money!. So I did a few searches online too just to get the jist of what it's about. I found Karen's main site and there is a page to post questions you might have. I thought of you 2007debtheaven. One thing she mentions is that you cannot clean for someone else (they have to do it). Maybe you knew that already. Her site is really interesting and the FAQ is a good read. You may also be able to ask about your house design and she may help you personally. 

 

Something else she mentions on the site is the version she uses variates from the traditonal fung shui. The traditonal form is different so if you are doing searches online and finding different information that may be why. Something else she stresses is there is a differance between 'clearing' and cleansing. She has a list of experts she would recommend if you require a proffessinal.

 

 I also went to traditonal master site and they had tips for 2008'2009'2010. Something mentioned for all three of these years is not to remodel anything on the north side of your house, also no candles should be burnt on the north side either. . The site shows tips for each area and things that should or shouldn't be and ways you can improve each area. . ex. A toilet should not be above the (wealth).  Placement of furniture in rooms, doors, etc. its pretty interesting. 

 

I put all my christmas stuff away and organized. waiting for the next session. Can't wait Kerimon!

 

How do you go about determining the areas of your house ?. That is one thing I cannot find. Our house is really small. Our house is a small 2 story-The top floor consists of our kitchen and bathroom and a spare room. Kitchen is facing south and north and on east wall. Bathrom is facing south and on the west wall. Spare room is on the north side split with the bathroom. Down stairs is open. Our bed sits on the south wall facing north. Our stairs run up and down on the east wall. Any advice?. We dont have rooms  (or very few). We live in  a small town and I really want to get this book the next time we travel into the city. I am not sure when that will be though..I would like to determine areas so if anyone has any ideas ..it sure would be appreciated.  

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Heather 2.0
Message #552 - 01/18/09 02:20 PM

Broke Brenda, I'm still just starting out myself, but the way I understand it is that you place the bagua (do a google search if you haven't seen it yet) over the floor plan of your house. Our house is very small too, so several bagua areas span multiple rooms and one room completely houses several areas (with 3 rooms on the main floor and 9 bagua areas... you do the math!). Once you get the bague image, you align it so the black career section lines up with your front door. You can also do this for individual rooms.

I'm sure some of the others will have better advice, but I figured I'd get it a shot.

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #553 - 01/19/09 12:30 AM

Broke Brenda
Thank you for sending me that info, I will definitely check it out!

T-Bird
Yes I have heard exactly the same thing. Story of my life, lol, how to get the guys to keep the lid down.

About DS2's room. After yet another discussion, he tells me he will clean it up next summer. He said the same thing last summer. I couldn't stand looking at it anymore, and I found it much too overwhelming to do alone without his help, so I just shoved it back into his closet (it was hard, lol) and at least now I don't have to look at it anymore, lol.

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Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #554 - 01/19/09 02:14 AM

Hey thank so much Heather. I found another site last night ..just before bedtime so will hop back there and hopefully get a little better understanding of Feung Shui. Yup I hear you on the small house thing, since we dont have rooms per say downstairs it might be a little different to determine. Another intersting thing I read, was about your front door..It should be made of wood not metal. Wood allows the good to enter. Also you shouldn't have a stove directly in line with the front door..guess what ?..I have a counter styled stove top and yep its right in line with the front door..they tell you ways to improve that..such as putting a water plant between the 2. Anyhow thanks again..off to check more out 

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #555 - 01/21/09 02:00 AM

2007debtheaven:  I have a Feng Shui book called Feng Shui Step by Step by T. Raphael Simons.  It gives you details per room including furniture placement, colors, and the fixes you can do to bring harmony and balance to your home.  It's very detailed (and I admit it loses me sometimes) but with the expert advice from Keriamon and what you can learn from this book may work for you.  I haven't read it in years but I remember a section about L shaped homes.  It gives very specific advice for any non square homes and rooms.  It also covers apartments too.  Here is a list of Part Two of the book:  The Effects of Clutter; Inauspicious Placement of Doors and Windows; Looking at the Shape of Your Space; Looking at Extremely Irregular Spaces; Harmonizing the Chi of Your Home and Colors; Lighting and Mirrors, etc.  Hope this helps!

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #557 - 01/21/09 04:21 AM



BTW if anybody wants their "Fortune of Your Door" done I can do that for you.  Example I was born in 1960 and standing inside my front door (the one I use) my door looks out to the West.  So my birth star is 2 and my door faces West.  My Door and Birth Star Combo is 50 which is:  50. Image: a ruby flashing in the sunlight.  Fame comes with successful works.  Let your intuition guide your decisions about possible course of action.  Specialize in your field of endeavor and prosperity and renown will be yours.  Take advantage of the help of juniors or people under you but show care and consideration for them.  Your good fortune will be long-lasting. 

 

That's what this book says anyway. 

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #558 - 01/21/09 04:29 AM



My DH was born in 1964.  His birth star is 9 (if a woman was born that year they would be a 6) and he uses the garage which also faces West.  His is 56. Image: gold being refined by fire.  Though hardships have to be endured, they are followed by flourishing fortunes.  Work hard to clearly define your aims.  Develop managerial skills in both professional and personal affairs.  Change brings promotion, resulting in a secure position.  Before you set out to reform others, however, work to refine yourself.

 

So if this doesn't sound too hokey to you and you want yours done just give me your birth year and which way the door faces that you use when leaving your home I will type it out for you. 

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lizwid
Message #559 - 01/21/09 01:24 PM



1982. Walking out of my apartment: faces East. To walk out of apartment building: faces South.

[Virgil Showlion]

TimeFerChange
Message #560 - 01/21/09 03:24 PM



I'm in too:  1969 F and the door we use the most faces East  DH is 1962 and M

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #561 - 01/21/09 05:02 PM



I forgot to add that I need to know if you are male or female.  For now I will assume female.

Lizwid:  Birth Star is 6 Door is East you are 21. Image:  a falling star.  In times of trouble, don't overuse power.  Be on guard against unforeseen dangers.  Don't take anything as face value.  Appearances may be deceiving.  Working out plans and making decisions under such elusive conditions spells trouble.  Why shoot at a target that simply isn't there?  Better wait and cultivate your powers of observation.  Everything changes.  If you are patient, you will eventually be able to make unobstructed progress and attain your goals. ETA:  You would use the door from your actually home not the building itself.

 

 

TimeFerChange:  Birth Star is 2 Door is East you are 18.  Image:  the woods blossoming in the springtime.  You will enjoy abundant growth and prosperity if you rely more on the help of those in higher positions than on your own efforts.  Be careful not to boast, however, it betrays weakness and causes you trouble.  Good fortune will come through new or renewed ventures and through ventures that start out small but have the potential of becoming large.  You may receive a windfall.

TFC's DH:  Birth Star is 2 Door is East - Same as you TFC!

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T-Bird_Money
Message #562 - 01/21/09 06:53 PM

1964, front door looks out to the west!!! 


How exciting!  Thanks Peace!

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #563 - 01/21/09 09:47 PM

T-Bird:  Birth Star is 6 Door is West you are 53.  Image:  chopping down a forest.  Curbing evil brings rich rewards.  The beginning may be lucky, but incompetence and extreme actions will threaten ruin.  Follow the middle way.  Strengthen your spirit and sense of purpose, and analyze your situation before deciding on the best course of action.  Be careful whom you employ.  Preserve early gains, be moderate, and rely on expert advice.

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lizwid
Message #564 - 01/22/09 03:48 AM

wow. mine seems ominous in some ways. I recently passed a huge certification for work and my job description is leaning more managerial and technical than just technical before. Wonder if that has anything to do with it??? Job market is awful in OH, but I currently have a job, but don't take it for granted???

[Virgil Showlion]

abundanceandprosperity
Message #565 - 01/22/09 04:50 PM



I am in too: 1980, female door faces north!

 

Big update!  Just returned from visiting family.  Sister just finalized her divorce.  Walked into her house to find chaos, clutter and so many things that needed fixing.  I came in and just started to help.  By the end of the trip her house was mostly in order and art/loved belongings that hadn't been hung in the years she has lived in the house are now all up.  After I left she continued the process herself.  There was so much to do that I didn't really get time to explain the bagua details.  I am planning to work with her on that from afar and to send her the things I noticed she needs as an early birthday present.  I cannot believe how receptive she was to the whole process and how much her spirits improved (the divorce was her idea so the biggest obstacle is moving on)  by each of the changes we made.  Just witnessing her reaction makes me a stronger believer and I am getting serious about feng shui.  Thanks for keeping me inspired ladies!

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Heather 2.0
Message #566 - 01/22/09 05:21 PM

If I was doubting that this is contagious, a few days ago BIL mentioned that the house has been looking so good, and he feels badly because he hadn't helped with it. So, he asked me to make him a list of things to take care of on his days off. I did, and no small order either, one included raking the yard (it's 20 degrees here). He took care of ALL of the list! I'm amazed at how everyone is pitching in more since I started this project.

DH keeps saying that I need to quit because he's not sure he's in the right house when he comes home! LOL

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #567 - 01/22/09 06:29 PM

Awesome Heather!

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #568 - 01/22/09 08:32 PM

Abundance:  Birth Star is 4 Door faces North you are:  4 Image:  a traveler retreating from a hazardous pass in the mountains.  You are blessed with divine protection.  If you cultivate a humanitarian attitude and are willing to be of service to others, you will enjoy unobstructed growth, prosperity, and a good reputation.  If, on the other hand, you are selfishly ambitious, you will come to a dangerous impasse.  If your are running into more and more complications in your life, retreat and examine your motives.

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luckytobeme12
Message #569 - 01/22/09 08:42 PM



Peace of Mind,

 

1956.  I have to enter through a gate, (my own, not shared.)which faces east.  The front door faces north...

 

This is so interesting...

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #570 - 01/22/09 08:45 PM



Luckytobeme:  When you leave your actual house/apt. which way does that door face before you get to the gate?  In the meantime I will assume it's the front door.

Your Birth Star is 7 your front door faces North.  You are 6.  Image:  a fresh stream of water flowing down from a lake into a valley.  Your fortunes will flourish.  It is wise to follow your desires conservatively.  Be careful when making changes.  It will be to your advantage to define and maintain your boundaries.  Don't bite off more than you can chew.

[Virgil Showlion]

luckytobeme12
Message #571 - 01/22/09 09:22 PM



Peace,

 

Oh wow, you are so fast! 

 

Typo, the year should be 1957.  Yes, you guess right.  

So sorry...

 

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #572 - 01/23/09 12:12 AM

Oh wow, you are so fast! 

 

Thanks!

 

Luckytobeme (correction):  Your Birth Star is 8 your front door faces North.  You are 7.  Image:  a waterfall cascading from the face of a towering rocky mountain into a rich green forest.  Difficulties eventually give way to good fortune.  There is much hope for you here.  Be patient.  If you hold out against untoward circumstances, you will come to enjoy great and lasting prosperity.  Seek out ways to bring the diverging elements in your life into harmony.  If you let others help you, your aims for prosperity and success will be realized.

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luckytobeme12
Message #573 - 01/23/09 05:33 AM



Peace,

 

Thanks a bunch for this illuminating "reading"

 

I own a small business that is in survival mode right now.  I have taken on a lot of debt to sustain it. 

This current recession is the worst in my 20 years as a small business owner.  I can certainly use all the help I

can get!  I need to activate my helpful people section on the double!

 

Positive thinking begets positive results!  

 

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #574 - 01/23/09 02:14 PM

Ladies, I need your help please.  Just received bad news last night that my dear friends' newborn has cancer.  This is a shock and is very serious (stage 4 already).  They have great insurance and are receiving top care already.  The help I need is knowing how to help and how to remain a positive support for the parents.  They live near me but their family and friends live overseas. I talked with DH and we are going to offer our guest rooms for their family as long as need be.  How else do I help?  How do I remain positive to help bring about the best outcome? 

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Heather 2.0
Message #575 - 01/23/09 03:05 PM

abundance: I think that offer is great, and will be very helpful. Is this their only child? If they have others, I'm sure you could offer to help care for them while they are taking care of the baby. Also, helping with food and/or household chores would help from a day to day perspective.

I'll send positive thoughts to your friends!

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Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #576 - 01/23/09 04:52 PM



Hi everyone. This feng shui is great. My DH has been helping a lot too!..and like you Heather He made his list of things and amazingly they are all getting done plus more!..wow!..I'm happier already..lol.

 

Peace if your not tired would you mind doing. me-1966-Female-door faces South. DH -1960-door faces South. This is so much fun. I have Karen Kingston's book coming to the local library and I cannot wait. We have been cleaning like mad men. Hoping to be ready for the 26th...I have this spare room though that's well. its wall to wall. wish me luck!.. I am saving it for last..and plan to tackle it tomorrow am!.

[Virgil Showlion]

PeaceOf Mind
Message #577 - 01/23/09 08:13 PM

Abundance:  What you are offering your friend is great.  More than anything just being there and listening and helping as needed will mean the world to them. 

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #578 - 01/23/09 08:24 PM



Broke Brenda:  Your Birth Star is 8 your front door faces South.  You are 39.  Image:  a sunset over the mountains.  The past looks better than the future in some important respects.  The future seems to have limited prospects.  You may be neglecting an important aspect of your life.  Cultivate insight and examine your needs.  It is useless to dwell on the past and blame others for your troubles.  Observe decorum and generosity of spirit or you will suffer losses.  Cultivate seriousness of purpose.  You will be successful in occupations that involve research and investigation.

 

Broke Brenda's DH:   Your Birth star is 4 your door faces South.  You are 36.  Image:  a brilliant star.  What you believe in your heart will come true.  Cultivate positive faith, concentrate your efforts, and you will succeed in realizing every one of your aims.  Abundant opportunities lie before you.  Good health, professional success, and a good reputation come to your door.  With patience and intelligent planning, you will be able to build a fortune that will provide comfort and security not only to you and your loved ones, but to future generations as well.

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Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #579 - 01/24/09 07:49 AM

Wow! that is impressive 'Peace of Mind'. . Doesn't sound great but realistically both a pretty accurate. Thank you so much. .. I know there is a lot of things I need to do and get done!..huh!..again feng shui has really made some things very clear.

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SaraOra_in_Jerusalem
Message #580 - 01/25/09 03:22 PM

Peace, could you do mine too? I am female, born in 1953 and my door as I go out of my apartment faces North. I then go down some outside steps and out through the building door that faces East.

Thank you so much! This is fascinating.

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PeaceOf Mind
Message #581 - 01/25/09 09:36 PM

SaraOra:  Your Birth Star is 4 your front door faces North.  You are 4.  Image:  a traveler retreating from a hazardous pass in the mountains.  You are blessed with divine protection.  If you cultivate a humanitarian attitude and are willing to be of service to others, you will enjoy unobstructed growth, prosperity, and a good reputation.  If, on the other hand, you are selfishly ambitious, you will come to a dangerous impasse.  If you are running into more and more complications in your life, retreat and examine your motives.

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SaraOra_in_Jerusalem
Message #582 - 01/26/09 02:16 AM

Thank you, Peace! You're wonderful! It really does make some things much, much clearer!         

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #583 - 01/26/09 08:03 PM



Okay, sorry I was away again for another week.  This time my hard drive crashed and took the modem with it (probably a pretty good sign that our house mess is causing bad feng shui).  But I'm now up and running again. 

 

Did anyone partake of the kitchen clearing last week, or do we need to run it again (since I wasn't around to promote it)?  We've done bathrooms, Christmas decorations and kitchens so far.  If people want to go past kitchens, it will be the master bedroom.

 

Bathrooms are linked closely to money, thus why they were first.  Getting rid of the Christmas decorations is pretty obvious at this time of year.  Next is kitchens, because they are considered the heart of your home; they are where families come together.  Next is the master bedroom because you can't sleep soundly if it's junky, and everyone needs sound sleep in order to have the energy to progress forward.

 

That being said, I have finally found my long-lost cleaning bug.  My husband cleared off part of the coffee table Saturday night, getting rid of things of his that I would not know if they should go or be kept.  That allowed me to just about complete the living room yesterday; I even did a preliminary vacuuming all around the edges.  I could just see old chi getting sucked up with the dead bugs hiding in the corners.  My husband even took a stab at our office yesterday evening while I was running errands.  Again, he got a lot of his papers and stuff cleared up so I can make headway on the rest.  Today's mission, for me, is the kitchen.  It's a wreck of dirty dishes.  I'd also like to finish off the living room.  That would leave me the spare bathroom (where the cats sleep and have their litter box; it's nasty in there) Tuesday, the den Wednesday, the master bedroom and bath Thursday and Friday the exterminator can come and I can rest.  That's the plan, anyways.  Wish me luck and send me some cleaning vibes.  If I can get the upperhand again, I can stay on top of it; I've just not had the motivation to get the upper hand for a long time. 

---

Heather 2.0
Message #584 - 01/26/09 08:05 PM

Could it be...?

Yesterday I finished reading Karen's Creating Sacred Spaces Book... After that, I got motivated to make a couple changes to our Prosperity sections (one on each floor)... On the second floor, it's our bathroom, and on the first, it's the kitchen (most centrally the kitchen sink!!)... Well, it freaked me out because she says that even if you do cures, the whole time you live in the house, you'll have to be really careful with money. And without cures... bad news! I've never had so many money issues as we have since we moved into that house!

So, I moved a multi-faceted crystal vase into the window in the kitchen. It's all sparkly! Then, just above the sink, I place 3 small round red vases. I'm hoping that it might help to neutralize the sink??

For our bathroom, she says to hang a crystal and/or have a big round-leafed plant. I ordered a crystal yesterday, but in the meantime, I hung a picture up that's a thick, green-floored aspen forest.

Regardless, I really like the changes... and I wasn't expecting anything to happen, because we've already had some good luck/positive financial movement. DH isn't so crazy about his job, but we both know how fortunate he was to find a job so quickly after being laid off. Well, this recruiter called him today about a job that sounds like it would be something he'd like more, and it's making $10-$25k MORE!!! (And this new job is already $5k more than his last!)

Could this be a feng shui thing??  Could it work that fast?

ETA: No clue what this below is!
 PR: wait... I: wait... L: wait... LD: wait... I: wait...wait... C: wait... SD: wait...

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #585 - 01/26/09 09:50 PM



Hey sounds like your really getting things together!..me too!..We have been working all weekend (between work) and should have most done for this weekend. I am still downstairs and still haven't begun to tackle the spare room. Man..I dont know about you girls but I find you make a huge mess to clean up the overall mess. I really like how its coming together though. DH is right in there helping..its amazing all the things you have been looking for for so long...appear out of no where!..lol.

 

Heather I am finding a small house isn't so bad!..its easier to create your areas . If you want to see another good site for Feng Shui go to (I wont post a link..but in search enter Rodika Tchi at about.com feng shui. She has a wonderful site with a lot of easy to use tips..easy ways to implement good feng shui..updates for 2009..etc..its really really interesting. I just print off the pages and refer back...

 

Anyhow I did my kitchen last week. Its all clean and organized!..ya..

 

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keriamon
Message #586 - 01/27/09 05:26 PM

Another thing I've read, Heather, is to tie a red string around your pipe under the sink.  That blocks chi from going down the drain.  You can also put a piece of red paper in or on the bottom of your trash can to neutralize it and keep from throwing good chi away.  The easiest cure for bathrooms, in any bagua area, is to keep the lid down.  Put the lid down before you flush, and it won't suck chi down with it. 

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Heather 2.0
Message #587 - 01/27/09 08:12 PM

Thanks, keriamon. I'm working from home today because we had about an inch of snow (people here are wimps!) so while I had a rare moment home alone, I ran around the house tying red yarn onto each set of pipes under our sinks. Next time the plumber is here, he's going to think I'm nuts! LOL

---

keriamon
Message #588 - 01/28/09 12:25 AM



Hey, if the feng shui works, you won't need a plumber because your pipes will work all the time (within reason, of course; everything wears out eventually).

 

I'm with you on seeing some rewards.  Not that I've done any feng shui cures, but apparently I got enough trash out of the house, enough grime sucked up in the vacuum and enough stuff put away and washed that I sold one of my knitted hats last night! 

 

I cleaned the spare bathroom/the cat's room.  Vacuumed all of it with the hose attachment, cleaned the toilet, tub, sink and counters.  Cleaned up the accidents and changed the litter.  I even washed their food and water bowls.  I don't think they know what to do with such a clean room, lol. 

[Virgil Showlion]

TimeFerChange
Message #589 - 01/29/09 09:26 PM



I did work on my kitchen last week.  I even completely emptied a couple of the cabinet and only put back into them what really needed to be there.  I had 3 open bottles of Parsley!

 

My bedroom is in desperate need of attention but I have to beg off this week.  I got almost all of my tax documents in so I need to work on the home office section and get my taxes done for the next week or so. 

 

Kerimon - What is your ETSY site again?  I know that it was on another thread but I couldn't find it when I was looking for it.

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #590 - 01/30/09 01:49 AM

Have any of you read about the exterior of a home?. We have to put siding on and am wondering if there are better colors etc, for Feng Shui.

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TimeFerChange
Message #591 - 02/01/09 05:35 PM



I think this just may be working.  When I did a rough version of my taxes in Oct I would have to pay a couple of hundred dollars so I have been saving up to pay.  I did a first run thru on my taxes yesterday and I am getting money back!

 

Between the refund and the savings I will be able to pay off one of my CCDs.  I am dancing around my clean kitchen.  I am waiting for the last couple of documents to arrive to confirm it all but I got most of numbers from the bank for the documents that are missing.  The only one I am missing should be less than $2 so I know I am close.

 

I may even be able to do some work on my bedroom this week after all.

---

keriamon
Message #592 - 02/01/09 06:34 PM



I am TheMedievalNun on Etsy and the web.

 

Brenda, I think the best color for a house is one that looks good!  Mind you, red is a good front door color (any shade of red; it need not be fire-engine red), followed by black, so you may want to choose a color that goes well with a red front door (such as taupe), but the area around the house is in matters too.  I mean, there's a reason why pastel-colored houses look so charming at the seaside, but look really odd in the woods, and why adobe houses look bizarre outside the deserts.  I think the most important thing is that your house have a harmonious color with its surrounding environment (which can include the color of the neighbor's houses).  White, by the way, is a funeral color in China, so I daresay it's not a favorite house color.  I'm not fond of white houses myself, anyways.  I like some color.  Also consider the type of house you have.  Victorian houses naturally lend themselves to the three-color scheme of Victorian paint jobs.  Cape Cod houses tend to be white, blue or yellow.  Ranches tend to stick with earthy tones, such as red and brown.  In the case of the latter two, where the style of house originated geographically has contributed to the color scheme.  That's not to say you can't do other colors, but you have to be careful.  A red Cape Cod can look weird, regardless of the surrounding colors and landscapes.

 

I made good progress this week, and feel like I finally have the upper hand on the house.  There's still room for improvement, but I can make those improvements with planned, daily cleaning routines. 

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #593 - 02/02/09 04:49 PM



Thanks so much Kerimon. I live in the woods..lol. Our house is quite cute and resembles a cabin on the lake type of feel. My taste is what you would consider rustic. With a bit of modern country. not cute country (if that makes sense?).  I tend to use a lot of greens and love moss tones with beiges, deep purples and browns. This can be seen throughout the house. So I am thinking a nice soft lighter green in a moss tone (kind of dusty) with the dark dark coffee brown and white trim-heritage colors.

 

Well I am almost done the downstairs and tomarrow I start the spare room from hell!...I have 2 days off (I'm gonna need em)..lol. Thanks again Kerimon.

 

Timeferchange-how exciting ! I have to do mine too but want to finish...the spare room first!..I have all my financial papers stored in the (SE-area). I hope it helps!..

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #594 - 02/02/09 04:50 PM

Great progress everyone!  I was away all last week but returned this weekend with motivation to keep fixing the problems with our house.  I am finally posting the piano I never use (it needs to be tuned and is too large for our space) free to whoever picks it up and am looking for new (to me) dining table, chairs, rug.  Time to finish the dining room!  Enough living with something that bugs both of us. 

[Virgil Showlion]

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #595 - 02/02/09 04:50 PM



Thanks so much Kerimon. I live in the woods..lol. Our house is quite cute and resembles a cabin on the lake type of feel. My taste is what you would consider rustic. With a bit of modern country. not cute country (if that makes sense?).  I tend to use a lot of greens and love moss tones with beiges, deep purples and browns. This can be seen throughout the house. So I am thinking a nice soft lighter green in a moss tone (kind of dusty) with the dark dark coffee brown and white trim-heritage colors.

 

Well I am almost done the downstairs and tomarrow I start the spare room from hell!...I have 2 days off (I'm gonna need em)..lol. Thanks again Kerimon.

 

Timeferchange-how exciting ! I have to do mine too but want to finish...the spare room first!..I have all my financial papers stored in the (SE-area). I hope it helps!..

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #596 - 02/02/09 04:52 PM



Thanks so much Kerimon. I live in the woods..lol. Our house is quite cute and resembles a cabin on the lake type of feel. My taste is what you would consider rustic. With a bit of modern country. not cute country (if that makes sense?).  I tend to use a lot of greens and love moss tones with beiges, deep purples and browns. This can be seen throughout the house. So I am thinking a nice soft lighter green in a moss tone (kind of dusty) with the dark dark coffee brown and white trim-heritage colors.

 

Well I am almost done the downstairs and tomarrow I start the spare room from hell!...I have 2 days off (I'm gonna need em)..lol. Thanks again Kerimon.

 

Timeferchange-how exciting ! I have to do mine too but want to finish...the spare room first!..I have all my financial papers stored in the (SE-area). I hope it helps!..

---

keriamon
Message #597 - 02/02/09 10:13 PM

So I am thinking a nice soft lighter green in a moss tone (kind of dusty) with the dark dark coffee brown and white trim-heritage colors.

You could also consider doing the house in a coffee or dark taupe sort of brown (a creamy sort of brown, in other words), with either the moss green as shutters and door with cream/light tan trim, or the cream as shutters with green as the trim.  I would definitely go with a cream color as opposed to white if you are going brown and green.  I think white would be too glaring.  Cream is an earth-tone, but white really isn't.  Cream has a good contrast to both the brown and the green, without being too loud (it will also not look dirty quite as fast), since you describe an overall sense of muted colors in your house.

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #598 - 02/03/09 04:57 PM



Wow!.. I kept getting a message saying there was an error when I would press post....would you like to re-try?..press ok!.so I pressed -re-try...a lot....lol.. sorry...

 

Kerimon you are right my colors are fairly muted. I was also thinking a light cream but wasn't sure how it would look as we have white vinyl windows ? maybe just the green and brown?. We also like the heritage blue kind of color in a lighter tone. Wonder how that would look with the coffee?.

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #599 - 02/04/09 02:23 PM

There are shades of blue (in the medium range) that look incredible with coffee (or a milky coffee tone).  I can see that looking beautiful and harmonious in your setting.

[Virgil Showlion]

Chanty.
Message #601 - 02/11/09 04:22 PM



Personally, DH and I have the same Kua number (which I thought was a surefire good sign) so we put our bed in the money position and since then: DH lost his job and our debt has increased so excuse my skepticism but of course if you clean your house you will be more organized and pay off debt efficiently. If there were a magic wand to wave, everyone would just clean their house and POOF! the recession would be gone... But let's get real here. I clean my house every single day and there is no money tree growing because of it. I looked to Feng Shui to increase my earnings and was handed b/s. Don't fall into the hype, the only thing Feng Shui is good for is interior decorating. For those who got lucky - it was just that: luck. Pfft. /rant.

 

I just don't want rational women getting their hopes up with false illusions of quick fixes... I really believed that this would help me, and I just feel so silly.

 

However, the setup in my house is quite alluring and I've received nothing but compliments on my "unique style" and "modern vibe." Of course, it wasn't me - it was Feng Shui. For example, if you open my bedroom door the bed is not directly infront of the door, so one friend said that was so "fresh and innovative." My son's room is "interesting and roomy, for such a small space... How did you make that work to your advantage?" Etc, etc - the list goes on. People are just impressed. For a clean, spacious, I guess you can even say harmonious household - definitely Feng Shui is the place to turn. As for money problems (and possibly others like health, etc) I'm not so sure this works 100% of the time and for everybody... :/

 

Now that I've complained, I am open to any advice or suggestions keriamon.

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #602 - 02/11/09 05:09 PM



I tried to edit my last message and it deleted instead, so here it is again...

 

Big update!  Took the initiative to rid my life of things I don't love/don't use/or are broken.  Sold the piano and tonight I am receiving new (to me) dining room furnishings, plus a rug and beautiful art.  I am really excited to clean the entire house and redecorate every room (some only need small changes).  Plus given the economy I have gotten really great deals (some used some from going out of business dealers)!  Wish me luck with keeping the excitement and inspiration levels up!

 

Chanty, I use feng shui like I use affirmations or changes in thought patterns.  Focusing on what is important to me causes me to make the change I seek.  Feng shui helps me focus on those areas of life I want to improve.  I try to remain positive in an often negative world.  I could see the downside of situations and lament them or I can see how not getting what I want has opened the door for something else. 

 

---

keriamon
Message #603 - 02/11/09 06:01 PM



Chanty, the "money" corner is not actually the proper name.  A lot of people call it that, but it's better called "fortunate blessings."  And, of course, not all blessings are money-related. 

 

Feng shui is sort of like religion in that you have faith that something good will happen.  It's the old say, "God doesn't close one door without opening another one."  Hopefully for your family, the loss of one job will turn into an opportunity to get an even better job.  Sometimes we can't have new and better without first losing the old.  And some would argue (me included) that having a positive mental attitude--having faith in something good, whatever it is--will allow you to make your own luck.   

 

As for Kua numbers, I personally don't know anything about them.  However, wood and water are the elements of the fortunate blessings corner.  Metal destroys wood and fire destroys water.  If you have a metal-framed bed, that can destroy the good chi of the fortunate blessings corner.  Fire elements, such as candles or electronics (t.v.s, computers, etc.) can also destory things there. 

 

Karen Kingston has a practical approach to feng shui: if it doesn't work, undo it.  If you feel like moving your bed has made things worse, then move it back to where you had it before. 

 

Job loss is not connected with the fortunate blessings corner nearly so much as to the career section and the fame section.  And Karen Carter says that having money in order to pay for life's basic necessities is more attached to the family section than the fortunate blessings section.  So why not have a look at those three places and see if there's anything amiss.  Think about things from a standpoint of those three sections in each room (pay most attention to the rooms which are most directly connected to the unemployed person), overlaid on the entire house floorplan, and then overlaid on the yard.  Some people forget the yard, and when they look, they realize that their broken-down lawnmower has been sitting in the section that they've been having problems with, or something similar. 

 

It never hurts to fix anything that's broken, in any section, and to clean out all trash and to declutter.  As you point out, it does make for a pleasant home to live in, so at least you're not down on your financial luck AND living in a depressingly dirty house.  It's easier to keep your spirits up when you have an attractive house, giving the unemployed a leg-up over other job hunters, who may be getting pretty depressed about their situation.  

---

2007debtheaven
Message #604 - 02/13/09 12:08 AM

Chanty

I do this because I like living in a clean and uncluttered home. This thread has really helped me stay on top of things, even though I'm pretty good about it anyway. Not because I thought a money tree would start growing, lol. Just take what appeals to you, and leave the rest!

But I haven't done anything in quite a while. The basement is still as is (again, my excuse is it is still better than it has been in over 10 years!)

We are getting our bathroom redone soon, in a month or two. I'd always wanted some baskets for inside the vanity. Today I passed a dollar-type store and found inexpensive white lined baskets. I bought four, and spent part of the afternoon and evening going through the the vanity and organizing the baskets, and then going through the medicine chest. It looks great. We have dozens of small bottles from travelling. They were pretty inaccessible, but now they are in a basket, so they're easy to access and we can start using them up.

It feels good to have finished a project again!  

---

Ltl Miss Suzy Sunshine
Message #605 - 02/13/09 05:38 AM



Chanty, I am sorry to hear your loss. I started implementing feng shui elements and really enjoy how it has changed our lives. Our house is very organized now!. In fact my DH has been cleaning his shop and its amazing!. In all honesty I am so happy with how our home feels, and looks. We have been so stressed with the economy and his job. Feng shui makes us feel better in our environment. I agree totally with 2007DH. We took what appealed to us and made changes. There is so much more to feng shui and it would take a very long time to fully understand. Also there are different types of feng shui. Traditional, non traditional, etc. Karen Kingston has her own approach to it and she makes no bones about that. If you have a chance to read her book, I really recommend it. She talks quit a bit about implementing things. Why some people are successful and others aren't.

 

I never thought much about the money factor when I started to clear my clutter!. I dont think there will be a money tree growing in my house either, lol. Yet I cant believe the change we have found!!.nearly $70...

 

It just makes me happy to know my DH isn't wasting his time on worry. He is enjoying his organizing and his spirits are high!.. I have never seen him so eager to clean before!!..it's great! ..to see him so motivated.

 

---

TimeFerChange
Message #606 - 02/17/09 03:15 PM



I've noticed a positive attitude shift in my tween DD since we started this.  Her bathroom has now been clean for more than a month and she had been making some progress on her bedroom too!  Since this has started I have had less eye rolling and slammed doors to contend with.  I think the more organized her space is the more relaxed she is.

 

Do we have a new target room?  May I suggest a closet of choice in the house?  The closet in my bedroom needs help desperately!  Other than organizing what kind of cures can we use in a closet?

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #607 - 02/17/09 04:44 PM



I think closets would be a good thing to work on, since they are bad to trap both clutter and chi. 

 

Closets should (in most cases) be factored into the room in which they open, so your closet will fall into some part of a room's bagua, and should be cured accordingly.  Because closets are a small space, and not created for decorating, the best two things you can do to "feng shui" a closet is to declutter/tidy and put an appropriate cure on the inside of the door.  This can be as simple as a piece of colored paper--colored to match the bagua.  You could also print off a picture that is appropriate and stick it up on the inside of the door as well.  But if you have something hanging on the inside of the door, you can stick it on the back wall--indeed, anywhere.  You don't neccesariliy have to see whatever it is you are sticking up, so you can hide your pictures or colored pieces of paper if you don't want them seen.  (Like when your spouse thinks you're crazy for believing in feng shui.)

 

Closets should not be so full that you can't get things out of them.  This not only stagnates chi, but it stagnates the air, and a closet which is overly full will develop a very real musty smell, because air cannot properly circulate around your clothing and shoes and the like, and something in there will start to put off a smell.  A musty closet smells a lot like a thrift store (now you know why they smell like that--they get all the clothes that used to be in cramped closets).  If you need to, add more shelves, plastic drawers, and whatnot to space your items further apart and to make good use of vertical space, so that your stuff is accessible and not all heaped into one big pile.  You might also choose to put in some sort of air freshener, or you can use fresh dryer sheets tucked into piles (good for linen closets), or you can splash some of your favorite perfume on a paper towel or even a used dryer sheet and put it in the floor (don't allow it to touch clothing because the alcohol in the perfume can bleach some fabrics). 

 

If you want to go to the next level, you can install a vent in the wall above the closet.  This is the very best way to allow air to flow into and out of the closet, and is just the cure for a closet which has a tendency to mold.  The other option is to installed a closet door which is louvered.  I thought the louvered door in the bathroom in our old house was just some icky 70's affectation, but the sheets we stores in there never smelled.  We store our sheets in our bedroom closet now, which has no form of air circulation, and it doesn't take living in that closet long for something to smell musty--our sheets especially.   

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #608 - 02/17/09 06:35 PM

Closets are a great fit for me this week too.  I will start with the bedroom closet tonight since that is all my stuff and is annoyingly cluttered.  Thanks for the suggestion ladies.

---

2007debtheaven
Message #609 - 03/15/09 07:07 PM

Well, it took me nearly a month to finally get around to it, but I did my bedroom closet today (clothes and shoes). It took me about three hours. I got rid of a bag of clothes and a small bag of shoes. Only a month late, lol.  

I still have to do my dresser (socks and underwear, nightwear). I'm going to try to do that early this week.

I feel good about it, I'd been meaning to do it even before Keriamon issued the "homework", lol.

I also went through the coat closet (DH and me) and coat hooks (kids) again, except for DS2's who is not home tonight.

---

seahorse989
Message #610 - 03/16/09 05:56 AM

I finally checked out a book at the library about Feng Shui.  I've been very curious about it since I saw this thread and have seen bits and pieces on television.  I have found out there are several things that I was already doing; such as my desk at home is against a wall and so is my bed.  I have been working on decluttering the house.  For X-mas I went to my basement and found many items I could regift to others who would appreciate them more.  I just finished up two projects I have been working on; a quilt for my niece and my mom's taxes.  I will mail those out tomorrow.  Anyway, I am very excited to focus my energy on Feng Shui.  Decluttering is something I need to work on anyway and if I happen to get a job b/c of Feng Shui that would be just fine by me.

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #611 - 03/16/09 05:03 PM

Hey everyone. While not much got done, a lot has happened. We were going to move, then decided not, now are waiting for them to finish painting the new place to move in. So we are moving in two weeks. I really really need to stop making last minute decisions to move since we just changed our mind on Friday. So fresh start is nice. But not looking forward to all the cleaning and packing and purging that needs to be done. We may have the keys as early as this week. But this time we remembered and checked the actual unit out before we agreed to transfer. It has everything it's supposed to this time. We learned not to accept a place "As is" anymore without checking it out first.

While I find this funny I also find it helps me believe in Feng Shui. Our bed is in the kids section of our room. It's clean under there mainly because nothing fits because it's low to the ground. Well my sheep( I have a small collection of stuffer Serta sheep that DH brought home from work) fell off my dresser the one day and since I was busy I just kicked them out of the way. The baby sheep landed under the bed. I just fished him out last night while looking for a book. He's probably been under there for about 5 months. I'm now 4 months pregnant.

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #612 - 05/19/09 06:02 PM



Cute story Martivir.

 

Any new challenges?  I need to focus on the fridge and the guest room/gym since we are leaving for vacation and family is coming in to stay at our place.  Any suggested cures for either place?  The guestroom/gym includes portions of all bagua's!

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #613 - 05/19/09 08:42 PM

Hi Abundance

I won't issue any challenges, and I don't know enough about FS to make suggestions. But how about we just post our own "challenge" and post on our progress?

We had our new boiler / hot water tank installed on a different wall in our basement storage room last week. DH had to move a lot of his basement carp into DS1's basement room next door to make room for them to work. (DS1 is on an internship abroad right now). We bought more storage shelves from Ikea on Sunday (because the room was refigured) and he needs to put the stuff back onto the shelves, ideally before my sister arrives on Sat.

Once that is done, I hope we are DONE with major projects for a very long while to come.

Good luck with your fridge and gym / guest room! I tend to work on my fridge when I'm cooking, since I'm in the kitchen anyway.

---

flynn11
Message #614 - 05/20/09 01:53 PM

So, I haven't actually joined WIR yet because I am waiting for our garage loan to come through before I start racing.  But...I came across this thread yesterday and it really intrigued me and I coincidently did some major decluttering last night.  I just had to share even though not much has been shared on here lately.  It wasn't much to do with fung shui, except we were getting rid of the old to bring in the new.  We are doing a major renovation on our house(old house, built early 1900s and last decorated in the 70s), so big that we completely gutted it and started over.  We got it down to just the studs and floor essentially so we haven't been living there either.  Anyway we had a huge pile of wood and everything we took out of our house right where our garage will be.  In order to build the garage we had to get rid of the pile...It is now gone!!!!  Not only is the garbage pile gone but our scrap metal pile, our scrap aluminum, our scrap copper, and my old jeep that I wrecked.  My DH and I had a goal to get it done by the end of May and we did it and more!  The scale of this pile is probably unimaginable unless you saw it, but it was probably 10ft high and 25ft x 40ft; so it took a backhoe and several trailer loads to get rid of it!  My yard is much less cluttered now...so happy.

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #615 - 05/20/09 06:23 PM

My project right now is the baby's room. When we moved someone got the idea to all the boxes in there that didn't have a set home yet. All my books, the goodwill box( which my mom and MIL started unpacking to put away. Now it's half of what it used to be and I'm not a happy person), and pretty much anything that wasn't kitchen stuff. And the second project is figuring out where half my stuff is. My MIL thought to help by unpacking and now I'm missing stuff and finding things in weird places. Like my kitchen towels in the master bathroom.

But this weekend we are going to clear out the last of the boxes. If all goes well I should find the stuff I was originally going to give away and find new stuff to add.

---

keriamon
Message #616 - 05/21/09 04:11 PM



Boy, this is a thread I need to get back on.  I seem to get started on cleaning up, then something happens and the house descends back into chaos.  I'm now looking for work, but I'm getting nothing but rejection letters (if anyone bothers to send me those).  There's also the fact that if I get a new job, it will be in a new city, so all of this stuff will have to be moved.  My husband is already dreading it; he knows the lion's share of this carp is his and that he will have to deal with it.  I figure that I will pack what's mine and what is ours that I want to keep, but if there's something here that I don't think should be kept, I'm not going to pack it.  He's going to have more time at this house than I will after I get a job, so he should do more of the packing.  And the more of his stuff he has to pack, the more likely he is to start getting rid of it.  If I pack it, he won't have to deal with it, so he will keep it by default. 


You know, there's something to be said for moving every once in a while; it's moving that really makes you think about what is worth taking with you and what should be gotten rid of.  I should point out that my husband has lived here for 15 years or more.  And, to be honest, it's never felt like my home because I feel like I have had to argue for every square foot of space for my stuff; I feel like a renter, not an owner because my stuff does not take up 50% of the house and garage; not even close. 

 

Here's a challenge: paperwork!  I have piles of stuff all over the house that needs to be filed.  I have resisted because there's a big pile of junk in front of the filing cabinet that makes it hard to get to.  My filing system goes down like this: one folder for every month of the year.  Stick all monthly bills and statements into a folder based on the month they were issued.  When you get to the end of the year, start over again, throwing out last year's bills (burn or shred) and putting this month's bills in it.  No one needs more than a year's worth of utility and bank statements.  Taxes are put into folders by years and they are thrown out after 7 years.  I also have folders for papers and manuals for computer games and appliances, and anyone should go through those every year or two and get rid of manuals to things you no longer own, or warranty paperwork to stuff that's no longer under warranty. 

 

Geez, what a time to have a cold; I feel like doing stuff right now, except I won't manage much before I collapse into a nap. 

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keriamon
Message #617 - 05/21/09 04:26 PM



I should point out, for people who find getting rid of stuff tiresome, if you don't even want to haul stuff to the Goodwill, you can get people to come get stuff for you.  If you have a lot of fairly nice stuff, Goodwill, Salvation Army or the DAV will often come out with a truck and a couple of guys to load it all up.  This is a good way to get rid of furniture that you can't move yourself. 

 

You can also post ads on Craigslist to either sell things or, if it's not worth much money, to have people come get stuff for free.  We got rid of a lot of metal junk (two truckloads worth) and old appliances that way; a couple of guys came and picked it all up and took it to a scrap place to sell and make themselves a little extra cash.  It got it out of our yard and garage with minimal effort and helped them out a bit.  Useable pieces of scrap lumber and other leftover building materials can also be gotten rid of that way; there's always people who will come haul away your construction junk for the benefit of free lumber for a project of their own. 

 

And if you have stuff left over after a yard sale, advertise it lock, stock and barrel for a very, very reduced price, or for free; there are actually people who will hunt for stuff for free or next to nothing in order to sell it at their own yard sale.  If you ever notice someone having a yard sale almost every weekend, that's one of those people.  They will even buy the contents of storage places sight-unseen at auction when people abandon it and then yard sale or EBay or Craigslist the contents.  It can actually be a pretty tidy part-time income for a SAHM.

 

You can also join the local Freecycle group on Yahoo and advertise stuff that way, but that's not necessarily a good place to go if you are tempted to trade new junk right back in.   

 

The moral is, someone will always come pick up your junk, so don't let the excuse of not wanting to haul it off keep you from decluttering. 

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red-t
Message #618 - 05/21/09 04:35 PM



Okay, house, finances, and marriage are all out of control! I just started to go through things last night and now I run across this post!  It is meant to be!!  I wish it were contained to one room but instead it is in every room.  To combat the financial problems I am working 3 jobs.  It makes for very little productive time at home.  I will be getting my kids involved.  Getting DH involved won't happen, but I can do this.  That has become my motto this year, by the way, "I can do this!". I am the daughter of a horder and have always sworn I would not turn into one...hmmm, then why do I have so much "stuff"? Time to purge. A friend has a rummage sale every June, so I will use that at an incentive to keep moving.  I have started 4 piles, keep, throw out, give away, or rummage.  Carry on all! 

[Virgil Showlion]

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #619 - 05/21/09 04:40 PM

Oh man I hate sorting paperwork. The sad thing is we have the file box to sort it, just DH either tosses it on top meaning to sort it later or it gets shoved into random piles along with other papers that should probably get tossed. And the man thinks that you need to keep everything. I've tried but of course the one time I go through the papers, he needed a bill from some credit card that he closed two years ago but they said he never paid his last bill when he did. So I no longer touch the papers.

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red-t
Message #620 - 05/21/09 04:48 PM



Oh, Martivir...

are we married to the same man?  I wrote one check from his business checkbook once (for $10 worth of printer paper) and accidently threw out the receipt.  You would have thought I paid for a stripper he was so mad.  I have never written another check from that account.  I have to take charge of me and my things before I tackle his clutter. 

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #621 - 05/21/09 06:33 PM

LOL, I think our hubbies are twins Red. But it's funny because he tends to hold onto things like old clothes and papers, while I tend to clutter up the house with Christmas gifts bought on sale in March and great sales from the grocery store. We finally came up with a rule that he has a certain space for his stuff but it needs to be organized while I have a spot for the stuff I like to collect as long as it's organized. And that we need to go through it on a regular basis so we know what we have. It's a relatively new agreement so we're still getting stuff to the organized part.

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starmaker7777
Message #622 - 05/22/09 02:12 PM



Hi ladies!

 

I have spent 2 days reading this string from top to bottom as a quite interested in feng shui and go through different phases when i am REALLY into and then forget about it again! I have had quite a few wonderful results after practicing the art of feng shui! I am a believer that there is 'something' in it...and yes..... i too have an "eye~rolling, non-believing" hubby, who gets annoyed if i mention that the good results we are getting are from my "feng shui!!!" LOL  

 

I notice you are all following the 'bagua' system - which is a more modernized version of the ancient school of feng shui...the ancient school, follows the 'compass' rather than the bagua....I moved into my mum's and she decided to follow the bagua in her home and decided to follow the ancient version...So the back left corner of her home (dining room) was HER wealth and prosperity, where she placed her 'money plant'...and for me, i got a compass and found the area of the house that was the SOUTH EAST part - which turned out to be where the stairs were....So placed my 'money plant' on the shelf of the window, as the stairs turned the corner, half way up.....

 

Within a few weeks, I got a job offered to me that was 'best salary' i had ever had in my life!!!! With a company car, laptop and cellphone and all my gas paid for!!! i would not let my mum move my plant from that spot and suggested she moved her plant to my area....and low and behold, another position in the company opened up and she got the job too!!! So for me, that was proof enough that following the compass was my ideal way to go....my mum is not convinced and prefers the bagua, even though that happened....so i think you have to stick to your own preference but i thought i would throw it out there for those that may have an interest in checking out the compass feng shui....

 

Obviously soon after that i moved into my own place....Then i met my lovely husband who i met in Paris, and then eventually came to live with me....he was an American, who lived in Germany and I was an English single parent mum....I activated the North part of the house for Career.....as he was looking for a job....Now as i activated it, i joked that i would put his 'statue of liberty' in that corner too and maybe he could enough for a visit back home to see his parents!...LOL...A few days later, he called his dad back in the usa, and his dad offered him a job!!!! LOL That was kinda freaky!

 

so now we live in Florida!!!! ....Just thought i would share a few little things that have happened....I have a lot more to share but dont have the time to sit here and type right now!!!

 

Looking forward to joining in with you girls, if the string keeps going!

 

 

 

 

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cheapcat
Message #623 - 05/23/09 03:16 PM



I donated 4 bags of book this week, there is a blue donation bin in the grocery store parking lot. I also listed textbooks on amazon & the one from last semester sold in one day. (The shipping was $14.00 since it weighed 6lbs 9oz ). A few other books are on there as well, they'll be taken off & donated if they don't move in a month. The books hadn't been used once since we moved here over 6 years ago, so they might as well go to someone who would like to read them. The old bookcase & a table are on craigslist, I'm thinking of dropping the price every week until they sell or are free. I have this one little table that I should list but I keep thinking someone I know would want it. A friend of mine always hangs onto everything until she can personally find "good homes." She has sooo much clutter it's scary. I should probably email a picture & list it if they don't want it.

It's nice to have the space opened up by getting rid of the extra bookcase. Now I just need someone to get it off the front porch! It's enclosed so it doesn't look too bad with the bookcase & table out there.

Oh, I just remembered something good!! I rearranged a little & put a green and brass box in the wealth section of the bagua. It also has concert tickets in it from shows we've been to over the years. DH's band just played their first show in 6 months and was offered 2 more. The really cool thing was that the manager of our department gave us each a check since the company isn't doing merit raises/any increases this year. Mine was $500!  I put $450 in savings and kept $50 out for something fun. It will probably just end up used on groceries or shirts for work...

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keriamon
Message #624 - 05/23/09 04:44 PM



Red T, you might be helped out by FlyLady ([www.flylady.net] .  She helps people get on a routine, so that they can clean house in small amounts of time.  It's kind of the principal of getting it clean and staying on top of it; if you stay on top of it, it doesn't take much time at all to clean.  It's when you let it go that it takes a long time to clean.  She's also big into finding ways to get kids to help.  Depending on if your kids are young enough, there's a separate program that she endorses called The Cleaning Fairy.  For a nominal fee, you can sign up for the program and The Cleaning Fairy will mail your children reading materials and motivational DVDs about cleaning up after themselves and helping out around the house.  You also recieve instructions on how to reward your children for doing a good job (as in the tradition of the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus, you leave treats in the name of the Cleaning Fairy, who is always watching to see if good little girls and boys try to keep clean and tidy).  I have read that the "Cleaning Fairy" sometimes even leaves treats for good teens and husbands, and that they actually warm to the treat and try a little harder, even if they don't believe in an actual Cleaning Fairy.  They just like getting praise and recognition from mom/wife. 

 

You know, the other night, I was looking at the mess on our kitchen counters (the dishes were behind when I got sick, and they've certainly gotten worse since I haven't done any; husband won't do any unless there's something he needs to use that's dirty; I don't know how the man can stand to cook when everything is in such disarray) and I was thinking how nice it would be to sell the place lock, stock and barrel.  Take our crafting stuff, our books, and our medieval stuff and just leave everything else in the house--the furniture, the dishes... just start fresh.  There's so much stuff that my husband wants to hang onto for no apparent reason, except that maybe he doesn't like the idea of me wanting to get rid of it.  Territorial, you know.  There's no room for me and my stuff because he doesn't want to get rid of his stuff to make room.  I don't even have a dresser; I've lived here for four + years now and his clothes are the only clothes in the single chest of drawers.  I have a shelf in the closet with a plastic storage drawer on it that contains my underwear and I fold up my night clothes and bathings suits and stuff on the shelf beside it.  I hang up my T-shirts and all my good clothes, including pants, and still my clothes take up less than half the closet.  The man has about three times the amount of shoes that I have.  Shouldn't a man be ashamed of having more clothes and shoes than a woman? 

 

I am so hoping that our moving will get him to face the reality that he has too much stuff, and that we can start in a new place as equals.  No more feeling like I have to cram myself into an unused corner of HIS house. 

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #625 - 05/24/09 11:29 PM

Welcome to the newcomers! 

My sis is visiting so I don't have much time this week, but it would be great if we could keep this thread active again!

Starmaker, good point about the compass! The first feng shui book I got (from my late MIL) used the compass method. I'm glad things worked out for you and I'd love to hear more stories, when you have time.

DH set up the two sets of Ikea shelves and put about 75% of his stuff back. It's not going as fast as I would like, but it's going. Those Ikea shelves are really roomy, they're twice as deep as another set of his shelves (can you tell DH is a pack rat?) So we've decided to buy yet another set of those Ikea shelves to replace the shallower ones.

Usually when I decide to do something I do it yesterday, but like I said my sister is here, and the day she leaves, one of my best friends arrives. So it may take a couple of weeks.

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jillbean_1978
Message #626 - 05/25/09 03:58 PM

I've been wanting to try Fung Shui for months now. I am so happy to see this thread.
Not sure how I can work the bagua into my house as a whole. Probably have to do it by room.
Question: How would the bagua be for a room when the door is in the corner and not the middle? Our living room has 3 doors really but the doorway from the front door is in the bottom left corner, not the center. But the other 2 doorways are in the middle.
 

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keriamon
Message #627 - 05/25/09 04:45 PM



Jill, I have to work our place room by room because we have a single-wide trailer; when you lay the bagua out over it, the two sections at the end are almost non-existenct and the ones on the front and back edge are stretched almost all the way across the house.  I'd not be decorating corners nearly so much as I would be decorating a foot-wide strip on the ends and multiple rooms across the edges.  Sometimes it's just not practical to bagua the whole house.  Although, if you want to give it a try, sketch out your house and mark your main entrance.  Then overlay the bagua so that the wisdom/career/people line (usually depicted as the bottom of the bagua) is on the same plain as the entrance.  In short, your door should open into one of those three sections.  Likewise, when you apply it to a room, one of those three sections should be on the same wall as the entrance to the room.

 

Here's where it get tricky.  You can also align the bagua to the compass directions; as others have pointed out, that's the older way of doing it.  That's sort of looking at your house in its relation to the world.  Putting the bagua inside your house, aligned with the entrances, is more like looking at how chi energy travels inside your house--which can be independent of how it flows around the outside of the house.  It's really a matter of what you feel is more important.  Some people feel that their environment plays a large part in the feel of their house; compassing the bagua would probably be more accurate.  But other people feel like their home is an ark in a troubled sea, with only themselves safe inside it, so the bagua in line with the energy flow inside the house would probably be more accurate.  Feng shui is very touchy-feely; what is brilliant for one person may feel terribly wrong for you.  Don't do anything that feels terribly wrong; that's your intuition telling you that the chi isn't right.

 

There is also another difficulty in that not everyone has only one entrance to their house.  Some people insist that you aline the bagua with the formal front door, but I'm more inclined to go with Karen Kingston who says align it with the door that most people come in.  The bagua is all about chi, and chi is energy, which flows.  Personally, I don't see energy flowing through a door that no one ever opens, or is opened infrequently.  Think about how people move through your house, and that's how the energy is going to flow as well, because people produce and stir up energy when they move. 

 

The house that I grew up in was a split-level and we ended up having two entrances which were used equally (neither of which was the front door, which was never used).  Depending on where we parked, we either went in the basement door, or we went in the back door.  Because there were two separate stories, the bagua would actually have been laid out in two different directions.  For the basement it would have been aligned with the entrance, and for the upstairs it would have been aligned with the back door.  In multi-story houses, you usually figure on the stairs being the entrance to one story, but where you can also come into that story from an outside door--and do--you can align to the door instead.  Again, it's what feels right based on how the energy flows.

 

As for your living room door, it doesn't matter if it's in a corner, because wisdom and travel are in both corners (with career in between); you just need for the door to fall into one of the three.  If you never come in your front door, and so never enter the living room from that direction, then you should probably align your bagua to one of the other doors--whichever one leads to the entrance of the house that you use.  For instance, our living room has three doorways--the front door, the entrance to the kitchen and then entrance to the hallway that leads to a bedroom and bathroom.  While we pass back and forth through all the doors constantly, the front door is the one that matters, because it's the source of in-coming chi.  However, if we did not use the front door and always cam

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keriamon
Message #628 - 05/25/09 04:46 PM



However, if we did not use the front door and always came in through the back door, which is in the kitchen, then the entrance from the kitchen would be the main entrance into the living room, because that would how our traffic pattern would flow when arriving home: back door, kitchen, into the living room from the kitchen. 

 

I hope that solves your door problem. 

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keriamon
Message #629 - 05/26/09 05:17 PM



Well, I've gotten started!  I'm still not quite over my cold, so I'm not running at anything approaching full-speed, but the fact that I've accomplished something makes me feel a little better. 

 

I don't know about others, but I'm pretty bad about being negative to myself.  As in I do something, and instead of being proud of my accomplishment, I beat myself up for having not done more, or I look around and despair of how much further I have to go and how it seems like I've made such a small dent.  FlyLady calls that "stinkin' thinkin'" and I'm majorly guilty of it!  I'd appreciate anyone's tips on how to stop doing it.

 

Meanwhile, I'll try and keep my spirits up by listing what all I've done today.  I burned trash, washed a sink full of dishes, cleared off three armloads worth of books (now neatly stacked away until I can take them to the used book store to trade), pulled the Goodwill bag out of the closet (the better to load it down some more) and found my husband's spurs that he was looking for Friday night, took pictures of his riding boots and put them on Craigslist to sell (he's had them longer than he's had me--6 years--and they've never fit and he's never worn them!), and cleared out some knick knack bric-a-brac to go to Goodwill.  In the process, I discovered that I have VERY dusty bookcases!

 

Some of you may like this blog I found: 50shousewife.blogspot.com/  It's on being a housewife/SAHM.  There's some tips and inspiration on there in regards to cleaning and getting organized (and keeping it that way), and she is also on a clutter-clearing mission. 

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #630 - 05/26/09 05:50 PM

I did pretty good this weekend even if I didn't get everything I wanted done. I got caught up with all my laundry finally. I'm usually running about a load or two behind. Didn't get all the boxes out of the baby's room but I did get two totes and three boxes out of there. DH actually went out and bought a paper shredder and started going through his papers. Granted he still kept stuff that I would have gotten rid of but at least he's started. Even if it's just pay stubs and student loan bills from 2004. Though I did find it funny when he held up an old credit card bill and said "Hey look! A month where I paid off more then I charged." The bill was from 2003. I even got one box of Goodwill right out of the house. It was just clothes and some blankets but it's out of my house. My kitchen isn't done really but at least the dishwasher is full of clean dishes rather then empty with a sink load of dirty ones. Going to try to get more of my weekend list done today.

We even did a little financial house cleaning done this weekend. I had a credit card that I haven't used in years that I've been meaning to close. But I couldn't because I couldn't find a bill or the card. Well one of the old bills was with DH's stuff so I called and closed that account. I hadn't used it in two years( in fact the last thing I put on it was my wedding dress) and it only had a 150$ limit. It was a store student card that all you needed was a bank account to open. I was laughing as I was on the phone because it was all automated and when you chose to close it, it was saying to press one if you are closing the card due to a mortgage, 2 if due to a consolidation loan and 3 for all other reasons.

[Virgil Showlion]

flynn11
Message #631 - 05/26/09 06:11 PM



Last week my goal at work was to clear off the piles of paper on my desk.  I didn't get everything done, but when I walked in this morning I hardly recognized my desk it was so clean!  This week I am going to continue with my desk drawers at work and I am going to file the papers in my bag that should be at home in a file cabinet.  I have decided that I can't fix anything else until I have 'decluttered'.  Good luck to everyone else!

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keriamon
Message #632 - 05/26/09 07:54 PM



I just got back from hauling a load to Goodwill.  Now I'm checking with my husband in regards of putting some stuff on Craigslist and getting someone to take away our old, dead truck (geez, I don't even want to think about the Feng Shui implications of letting a truck rust in your yard; maybe there's a reason why rednecks aren't wealthy?). 

 

The more I look around this place, the more I realize it's the pits.  Still haven't picked up all the trash in the backyard that the raccoon scattered the last time.  Leaves and tree pieces all over the front and back deck, plus a dead patio furniture set and bits of electric rope fencing and tools we never put away.  Argh... As soon as I've had something to eat, I'm going to start loading up the truck so I can haul trash tomorrow. 

 

A lesson to everyone out there: KNOWING about feng shiu doesn't do any good if you don't PRACTICE it.  Of course, Karen Carter, author of "Move Your Stuff, Change Your Life" admits that she's had her lapses too, such as the time she bought a couch that was a bad color for where she wanted to put it, and due to one thing and another, she failed to correct it with some colored throw pillows, until one day she realized they were in a bit of a mess financially and she felt all out of sorts, so she fixed the couch and started decluttering things she had accumulated after having a baby.  Family members unexpectedly gave them money to help them out of their hole. 

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2007debtheaven
Message #633 - 05/27/09 01:47 AM

FlyLady calls that "stinkin' thinkin'" and I'm majorly guilty of it!  I'd appreciate anyone's tips on how to stop doing it.

Keriamon, I'm going to answer you honestly and I really hope you don't get angry with me. Unfortunately, laundry and dishes are part of everyday life. You need to keep up with them. (I don't mean you personally, of course. I mean "one".) When you (or anybody else) finally gets caught up with the dirty dishes or a few loads of laundry, obviously that doesn't feel as good as clearing out a closet or tackling a basement or a shed or a desk, because on some level, it's just regular maintenance. Or "hygiene" for your home. You wouldn't go three days without a shower, so why is it OK that your clothes or your dishes go three days without being cleaned? This said I have four kids and I have no choice but to keep up with those tasks because otherwise I would be overwhelmed. So I admit I may be excessive the other way.

But I'm guessing you feel GREAT about that haul to Goodwill though! Because that's NOT regular maintenance. See what I mean?!

In other news: today the weather was awful so my sister and I went to Ikea and bought those shelves. I put them together. So now hopefully my DH will do his thing, sooner rather than later. LOL.

Keria, you have had a lot going on these days since losing your job. If you do end up moving, I'm sure you will feel much happier having your own designated space. All the best to you, you know we adore you.

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jillbean_1978
Message #634 - 05/27/09 01:50 PM

I'm slowly getting the decluttering done in the house. I know I have lots more in the garage. But I am already starting to feel a bit better from what I have already gotten out!!! Now I am looking at my pictures on the walls and wondering if they are bad ones. LOL I did move a couple of pieces. Hopefully I put them in the correct places.
 I am hoping to get the garage started within a week. I know it's going to take several days. And several trips to the place I am donating to. But it will be worth it!

Which area is to help with feeling anxiety and overwhelmed? Is that ONLY the health area? LOL

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keriamon
Message #635 - 05/27/09 02:39 PM



Well, the tow truck guy came early and the old truck is gone!  My husband said we could spend the $50 getting the A/C on our new truck recharged.  I felt quite pleased with myself yesterday afternoon because I not only lined someone up to come and get it, but I stripped it of the floor mats and bed liner.  For $50, I didn't think they should get either, although I did leave them the cheap plastic console with beverage holder (our new truck has real cup holders--major upgrade!).  So the bed liner is going on Craigslist, for hopefully an additional $10-$20, and my husband is probably going to use the floor mats (which are practically new) in his car. 

 

When you (or anybody else) finally gets caught up with the dirty dishes or a few loads of laundry, obviously that doesn't feel as good as clearing out a closet or tackling a basement or a shed or a desk, because on some level, it's just regular maintenance.

You're probably right.  But, I still think I should somehow figure out a way to give myself a pat on the back for staying caught up, instead of looking at it from a glass is still half dirty point of view--as in I look at what I haven't done, as opposed to what I have done.  Although maybe the view from the kitchen window will look better today because there's no old red truck in it! 

 

I guess regular house maintenance is just a pretty thankless job.  But, on the other hand, it's been a LONG time since I had this place in shape.  I used to get it looking pretty good on a somewhat regular basis, but I haven't had a total clean in a long time.  I seem to get one room done up, then lose motivation; it doesn't take a week for it to be a mess again.  I mean, look at the fact that I haven't worked since August, and this house still bears a distinct resemblance to itself at that time.  I think it's hard to maintain a small improvement when you are in desparate need of a LARGE improvement.   

 

Of course, Karen Kingston would say that we have clutter and mess around us for a reason.  Wanting to clean it up is wanting to change the direction of our lives.  I figured I'm never going to get a job with the house in the state that it is in.  And if I did, we couldn't put it on the market to sell right away, because it would need a month of weekends getting it straightened out.  In short, we can't move forward (literally and figuratively) with the house the way it is. 

 

My husband had a laugh last night that we were only going to get $50 for the truck, although he was mildly impressed with my  "liberating" the floor mats and truck liner first.  But then he said, "Just so long as it's gone.  If we can make a buck off this stuff, that's fine, but I'm most interested in having it gone."  So I sort of feel like my husband, FINALLY, is with me on clearing stuff out.  Moving, for him, has been a vague notion since he and I met (6 years ago!), but he has never shown any real motivation towards doing what's necessary to sell the place (he has lived here for something like 18 years).  I think he's finally, really accepted the idea of moving.  He's come to terms with the thought of leaving this place.  So I think that's why I might finally be able to move forward with cleaning the place up, because it's not just a surface clean, but we're finally doing what I've wanted to do all along, which is weed out the unnecessary things.  Now everything is in the light of "do we want to pack it, move it, probably pay to store it, then move it again before unpacking?" 

 

He never had a good reason to get rid of stuff before, because there was always a cavernous garage to hold it (not that he minded an over-stuffed house).  Now he's starting to look at stuff in a new light.  Hopefully he will come to appreciate the freedom of not having too much stuff.  I found this out in college, after I read the "Clear Your Clutter With Feng Shui" book.  I spent several months purging my rooms, one by one, until I had a neat little apartment.  It was tastefully decorated, which you could notice because there wasn't clutter everywhere.  And it was never

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keriamon
Message #636 - 05/27/09 02:41 PM



And it was never a burden after that to keep it maintained.  I took pride in the fact that it was all clean and neat.  In fact, I went from a fomerly messy person to someone who couldn't stand to have something out of place, spoiling my postcard beautiful little rooms.  I guess it's true that clutter attracts more clutter, invites depression, and generally resists you getting rid of it, like any other bad habit.

 

You know, I just recently remembered something about this place.  Of course I knew that my husband was divorced previously, but when he said something about the people who had the place before them (the original builders), I asked them why had they sold.  He got this sheepish sort of grin on his face and he said, "They got divorced."  I said, "Mm-hmm" in a meaningful sort of way.  He admitted that he had told a friend this at one point and she told him that maybe he should move if he wanted to keep me.  Of course, it's rare that a place itself is cursed, but when something negative happens, it can get stuck in a loop of reoccurence, unless you do a space clearing and clear out the old energies and introduce new ones.  I admit that I've tried doing one a couple of times, but I never felt very successful.  Maybe I helped some, but I think the place is still stuck in a pretty negative loop (but then, it's never had a clutter clearing, so that may be why it insisted on staying anchored in the past). 

 

Anyways, that's enough rambling for the morning (the tow truck guy came early, so I got out of bed suddenly and an hour before I wanted to, so I'm still getting woke up).  I'm going to start putting more stuff on Craigslist and gathering up trash to make a haul to the . 

 

BTW, the old, dead truck was sitting in the skills, knowledge, and self-improvement section of our land!  I figure our barn/garage probably falls into that section too, and there's trash piled up in front of it that we haven't bothered hauling off (going today, so long as it holds off on raining), and then, of course, there's all the cluttter in it (including some ex-wife furniture which is going on Craigslist--she left it here 8 years ago!). 

[Virgil Showlion]

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #637 - 05/27/09 03:55 PM

2007, yes things like laundry and dishes are regular things that should be done but at the same time who likes to do those things. Other then my mom. Every time she comes over she cleans my kitchen for some reason. But my kitchen is usually presentable. Counters are crumb free, dirty dishes are either in the sink or in the dishwasher not all over my counters, and the floor stays swept. Like right now I just need to swap out the dishwasher and my sink will be empty. But also too it's easy for us to get behind in laundry because we don't have our own machines. When I want to do laundry I need to load up the baskets, check to see if we have money on the laundry card( and if not then it's a trip to the rental office to reload it), check to see of someone is already doing their laundry( since we have two machines for 24 units) and then drag everything down the hall to the laundry room. I admit that it's much easier to keep up with now then before we moved. Three flights of stairs with a week's worth of laundry stinks.

And I think that the ball has started rolling with the financial house cleaning. I got a medical bill yesterday and called the insurance to figure out what was going on. Well if I had never called them I would have never found out that my doctor has been getting more money out of me then he's supposed to! He's been billing for each visit rather everything after the delivery. So my maternity coverage never fully kicked in. I need to call him once they get back from lunch to tell him he needs to either go to a bill at the very end or I'm switching docs. I've already given him almost 400$ more then I should and if he continues this I'm going to need to pay for 20% of my hospital costs rather then getting it covered in full. It was supposed to be one 25$ co-pay and then everything else other then bloodwork was fully covered. I mean what's he's doing is not against the rules( though it is frowned upon) but I'm already paying nearly 500 a month in premiums. I shouldn't need to pay 150-200 a month on top of that when I don't need to.

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keriamon
Message #638 - 05/27/09 09:14 PM



Even though I didn't pick up all the trash I wanted to (it was about to rain when I started and was opressively humid), I still hauled off a truck load! (and this is a big truck!).  I have a couple of bites on my stuff on Craigslist too, so hopefully that will start flying out of here.

 

Weather permitting, I think tomorrow's project is going to be clear off the front and back deck.  There are still leaves on it from this winter and the weeds and trees are trying to take it over; I need to hack them out.  Plus there's some tools and junk on it that need to be put away (I already got most of the trash off). 

 

It's amazing, but the house already FEELS better, even though I've not done a lot inside it.  I've just been getting a lot of weight (physical and metaphysical) off of it.   

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jillbean_1978
Message #639 - 05/28/09 01:41 AM

Today me and Dh started working on the garage. We went through 20 totes of stuff!!! It feels great to have my van loaded down with items to donate. And we aren't done yet. LOL But I am hoping we can get out there again this weekend. We only kept items that will be used. Or what we still liked. The rest will be passed on to another soul to use and care for.

Funny how things get really out of order when trying to create order. LOL I mean I have things that do are important to us. Our problem is this 100+ yr old house doesn't have any storage places. It's kinda hard to NOT be cluttered. But I feel much better on the stuff we have already gotten rid of. I mean, it's just stuff. It's not a family member. It might remind us of someone but it's not the person. Just an item.

I am now wondering if the decor really matters? I was given things to put on the walls that had I been buying it I would not have gotten. But it was free and we 'needed' something on the walls. Should I start watching for anything that would be better? I have read that ducks are a symbol of good luck in Fung Shui, do I have to start liking ducks? LOL I'm more of a midevil decor kind of girl.

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keriamon
Message #640 - 05/28/09 04:04 PM

Our problem is this 100+ yr old house doesn't have any storage places.

That's probably a clue.  People 100 years ago didn't keep a bunch of junk to have to store!  People of wealth would have a china cabinet and often a side-board, and that's where they kept the good dishes and silverware and table linens.  Christmas decorations were probably confined to one small box in the attic, because many of the decorations--like cranberry and popcorn strands, greenery, even the tree--were made new every year; only a few little trinket ornaments would be kept.  Where there are no closets in bedrooms, a wardrobe would have been used (which is typical in England, I've noticed; they don't do closets).  They had much fewer clothes and shoes than we have now (you would too if you sewed them by hand), and they simply couldn't afford bric-a-brac all over the place (no Dollar Trees where you could purchase cheap stuff from China); they would have a few expensive pieces (including photos, which were a sign of status) decorating the walls, and would have been very proud of them.  They made up for the lack of furniture and decorations by having really loud, busy wallpaper and unbelievable curtains.  That kept the room from looking empty, and it also kept the room from being cluttered--you can't put a lot of stuff in a room with busy wallpaper or you overwhelm the senses.   

 

My grandparents live in a little house and my grandmother constantly laments the miniscule closets (a wardrobe would probably be bigger!), but you know what?  She purges those closets REGULARLY.  She can't afford to have anything in there that isn't useful.  They have no attic and no cellar, and my grandmother would never think of storing anything in the garage (which is my grandfather's worshop).  So she is forced to clear the clutter regularly.

 

Some might think that a blessing in disguise. 

 

Jill, if you have stuff that you don't like, don't put it on the walls.  As I've pointed out, the Victorian way of decorating involved patterened wallpaper.  You don't notice a lack of stuff on the walls nearly so much as when the walls are a solid color (or worse, white!).  If you prefer medieval decor, then you could paint/stencil the walls instead.  The occasional large painting (print) and a tapestry and candles would be all that's needed.  And, in the case of the Victorian wallpaper, too much on the walls would actually detract. 

 

Here are some pictures I took while in England and Scotland of medieval furnishings.  www.angelfire.com/planet/medievalsca/home.html  You should especially like the bedroom in the White Tower.  That's what I'm talking about regarding stencling the walls (although I don't think a stone block motif would work nearly so well in a wooden house; maybe a different shape).  Also note that they hung up some pretty fabric on the walls, like a curtain.  This would not be a bad thing in your old house, because it would do for you what it did in the middle ages--help insulate the walls. 

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2007debtheaven
Message #641 - 05/28/09 06:09 PM

I reread my last post and it sounds "holier-than-thou" and I really don't mean it like that. I hate doing that stuff too, believe me! It's just that with the kids, it becomes a question of what I hate most: doing laundry and dishes regularly, or letting them pile up. As much as I dislike doing them, I dislike the mess that comes from letting them pile up more. But I have a washer and dryer at home which of course makes things easier. So my apologies!

Keria, it sounds like you have definitely gotten things rolling! I think getting the truck out of the garden will prompt your DH to bigger and better things. I'm glad he's on board.

Martivir, good for you for taking care of that billing stuff! And I'm glad you're happy with your new place!

My sis left today but a friend arrived, and then DH's cousins arrive when he leaves. The friend and cousins aren't staying here though. So this post is a bit of a hit-and-run as I try to get caught up. Welcome to the newcomers!

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #642 - 05/28/09 06:24 PM

2007, that's one of the problems with a message board. We can't tell if your grinning while your posting or scowling while you type something. But it's all good. I know exactly what you mean. A lot of times it does seem like which is the lesser of two evils. Finishing the laundry or fishing someone else's underwear out of the washer that's been sitting there for two hours. If DH needs work clothes then I take the clothes out, but otherwise laundry can wait till another day. Oh how I wish we had our own washer and dryer. I actually like doing laundry but when it's a production, it's not as fun. As for the kitchen I think I'm going to be mean and say who ever cooks doesn't have to do the dinner dishes. Hehe I do all the cooking. I think with the regular stuff it's all a matter of finding a system that works. And kids old enough for chores doesn't hurt either. But I really should stop letting it get to the point of us running out of silverware.

And while yesterday could only be deemed a lazy day, I did spend most of it on the phone trying to get things straightened out with the billing department. And while the dishwasher is currently running, I took one step forward then two steps back in the kitchen. I started to load the dishwasher but forgot to unload the clean stuff first and got raw egg all over the clean dishes. Oops. I'm also going to hang some pictures up as well. They do me no good leaning against the wall.

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #643 - 05/28/09 06:36 PM

Martivir

Everybody needs a lazy day now and then!!! I'm counting the days till my next one (hopefully Sunday). You've made a LOT of progress. Being pregnant will do that to you! Those cliches used to drive me nuts, but I finally concluded that they become cliches for a reason, lol.

About the washer and dryer. Here they're usually in the kitchen (even in apartments, trade-off for less kitchen storage). I know it's not like that in the US, unless things have changed. Our house is old so both our washer and dryer are in the kitchen. New houses have a laundry room. New apartments have a laundry closet (the machines are stacked).

It sounds like everybody here has made a lot of progress! Except my DH, lol. All these guests are keeping us busy. Hopefully he'll find at least a few hours for it this weekend (it's a three-day weekend here).

And I agree, it's all about finding a system that works. I'm much older than you, so I've had much more time to find one, lol. And what you did with the clean dishes in the dishwasher? My kids used to do that constantly, that's how I learned to unload it as soon as it was done.

I do regret not having made my kids do more chores. Here HS is SO hard, and they have such long days (eight-10 hours is not atypical, then they have tons of homework, and sometimes commute times too), the tendency is to not make HS kids do many chores. But I've gotten better about it with the younger two.

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #644 - 05/28/09 07:36 PM

It's like that here too with the laundry. Older houses have the machines in the kitchen( oh how I would love my machines in the kitchen) or the basement, new houses have a laundry room and if you have them in your apartment you get stacking machines in a closet. In my complex the townhouses have the machines in a closet off the living room. I like having the laundry just down the hall from my front door. I just don't like sharing. Plus it seems they put all the people who stay at home on my side of the building because even during the day in the middle of the week someone is usually doing laundry.

And while our( at least public) high schools are easier then yours there is still the tendency of parents to let kids slack on chores. The old trend when I was in school was advanced placement classes, the honor society and an after school job. Now it's eighty zillion hours of volunteer work, after school activities and maybe a weekend job. My cousin, who is 19, has friends coming out of high school who have perfect grades, great resumes and can't even use a vacuum without mom's help. Most of them have never even had a summer job because their parents have them in every type of summer camp you can imagine. We can only do what we can and hope for the best. Though I will say my one cousin( the sister of the 19 year old) got hired for a completely unrelated job due to her talent with the glockenspiel. He took her ability to play several instruments to mean she was dedicated to learning new things. He wasn't far off the mark.

And I'm going to try something. I know that I love the before and after pics on shows like How Clean is Your House and Clean House. Heck ok I'm a before and after picture junkie. Plus I'm horrid at completing projects and I need some kind of light at the end of the tunnel. And that light can be my very own collection of before and after pics. At this point I'm willing to try anything to get my projects done.

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keriamon
Message #645 - 05/28/09 09:30 PM



Marti, have you heard of the S.H.E. system?  It is what FlyLady started on, but it's a bit different than her program.  There's info on it on that blog that I linked to a couple of posts ago.  Basically you have an index card with a chore written on it.  If you need to, for your family, you can write instructions out on how to do it, or write down what cleaning solution to use and how much of it and where it is stored.  The cards can be colored, or you can put a colored mark or dot on them to organize them.  You basically have cards all the same color to denote chores that need to be done every day (like feeding the animals or washing dishes), cards of a different color that are done weekly (like mopping the kitchen), cards of yet another color that are done monthly (dust the ceiling fans, clean the inside of the microwave), and things that are done seasonally (flip the mattress, replace the smoke detector batteries).  Some people also make out cards with birthdays and anniversaries on them and slip them into the system at the beginning of the appropriate month, as a reminder. 

 

You put your cards into a box and then how you organize them is up to you.  I'm planning on working this system myself, and I think I like the idea of 7 dividers, one for each day of the week.  You start out putting your daily chore cards behind today's divider.  Every time you do one, you slip it into tomorrow's divider until you have them all gone for today.  How you do the weekly chores can vary.  Some people like having a set day of the week to do something (like the mopping); if you like that, you can divvy out your weekly cards so that they are behind the appropriate day.  Personally, I've tried that system several times and it always ends up not working out for me, because if I don't pick up on Monday, I can't vaccum on Tuesday.  Or it's a day to clean up outside, but it's raining.  I think I'm going to put all of my weekly cards behind Monday and what I don't get done that day will get carried onto the next day and so forth; hopefully, by the end of the week, I will have done all the cards. 

 

On Monday you put all of your used weekly cards back in their spots to go again (or you could have Mon-Sun dividers for each of the four weeks per month, so when you do a weekly chore, it gets slipped into next week; however many or few dividers you want to use).  You also have monthly and seasonal chores, which I think I will do the same way as the weekly ones; slip them in the first of the month and keep passing them on to the next day until they get done.  It's kind of like nagging yourself because you have to look at the card every day, even if it's to pass it off to tomorrow.

 

I think this system would work well for people with kids or even spouses who also do some chores.  You could set your little box up in, say, the kitchen, and everyone has to take a card (or more than one) from today's slot (be it a daily, weekly or monthly chore) and do the chore--whatever chore they want that's available.  When they've done it, have them put the card aside (you, as the master, will have to collect up the cards and organize them for the next day).  People who dawdle about picking out a chore are likely to get stuck with the ickiest of chores; people who are on the ball can pick the chores that are the fastest or easiest.  Make a penalty for failing to do the required number of chores.  You could impose extra chores, or you could impose a fine (like $1 or $2) and put that into a kitty for family savings purposes. 

 

This is a similar concept to the FlyLady routine binder, but not all people like binders.  Also, as I have pointed out, there's some room for flexibility.  Personally, I rebel against schedules that say "9AM, get up; 9:15, take medicine; 9:30 eat breakfast."  This index card system doesn't lay down the order in which you do things daily or even weekly, so you are free to change things up depending on your mood, other things in life that pop up, or the weather.  It also makes it easier to divide up the chores among many people, beca

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #646 - 05/28/09 09:48 PM

I was thinking something similar to what parents do for little kids. Just one big chart of what needs to be done on a regular basis. I'm not sure index cards in a binder or box would work for us because we'd toss it somewhere then forget about it. But if we had a big chart on the fridge we can't really toss that in a drawer somewhere. Put the daily and weekly stuff right onto the chart and then glue magnets on to index cards with monthly and seasonal stuff that we can stick to the chart as needed. And little things with magnets on the back( one color for me, one for DH) that we can stick to the chart when stuff gets done. Yes it is childish but if it works, it works.

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2007debtheaven
Message #647 - 05/28/09 10:17 PM

Martivir, I agree that one big pie chart with an arrow would make things easier. BUT, you'll need to change things as they get older.

DH and I always get a kick out of our close neighbors' / friends' place. They have two sets of fraternal twins who are older now (10 and 13.) Now that they are older, they no longer have the pie chart on the fridge. (And when they did, being twins, they always got to do their chores in pairs.)

Now their "chore" chart is a list of short rules like, no f.arting or b.elching at table, no fighting, do your homework. Whoever breaks the rule that day (and somebody always does) has to sit at the head of the table and fetch everything the other kids forgot when they set the table (salt, pepper, napkins, ketchup, etc). My friend told me she thought up this diabolical rule because she was fed up with always being the one to get up to fetch this that or the other thing and eating her dinner stone cold.

I thought that was both hysterical and creative!

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #648 - 05/28/09 10:36 PM

I wasn't thinking a pie chart but more like a grid. Dad always made one every year when we went on vacation. There were five of us kids and it had the days we were there across the top and the chores that needed to be done down the side. Then he put in everyone's name in a chore square. He always finagled it so we had one chore free day. And that we never had to do the same chores everyday. But instead of putting our names just putting little magnets there so we could just put something so we know it got done. 

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #649 - 05/28/09 10:53 PM



Well, I'm putting together the chore box now; we'll see how it works for me.  I've tried the FlyLady binder/routines system multiple times and have always failed to keep it going.  I thought that it was just me, but I read someone else's post on a blog that they too would put the binder away and forget about it because it was too big and took up too much room; there was no good, central place to leave it.  The card system works on the same principal, but is a bit more flexible (because it's easy to change around what days you do what chores) and takes up a WHOLE lot less space.  So maybe it will work better for me.  It is not portable, though, and some people love the fact that the binder is something they can take with them so they can get paperwork (like bills) done when they are sitting in the car waiting on something.  But I never took my binder anywhere because I don't spend a lot of time idling in the car or in waiting rooms, so portability doesn't matter to me. 

 

I have had a pretty slow day today.  I'm still coughing a bit, and I've been going pretty heavy for two days straight, so time to let off a little bit.  Still, I did clean off the front deck (the back will have to wait until tomorrow).  I put all the tools away, got the last bit of trash bagged up, swept off the leaves and sticks (two wheelbarrows full!) and cut out the weeds.  Inside the house, I've maintained yesterday's level of cleanliness, although I think I've gotten a few more dishes caught up (I do plan on doing some more of those tonight), and I put away a load of laundry. 

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2007debtheaven
Message #650 - 05/28/09 11:09 PM

Martivir, the grid would come in between the pie-chart and the list in terms of age-appropriateness. You wouldn't really need to know how to read for the pie-chart, you'd just need to recognize your name and the symbol for what you'd have to do. You'd probably need to know how to read for the grid, unless it was also done with only names and symbols (for the chores). You'd definitely need to know how to read (even beginner level) for the list.

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #651 - 05/28/09 11:58 PM

Since it's just DH and I right now I'm not too worried about age appropriate. I can make either a new grid or a pie chart once I start having the kid do chores. But that's at least 3 years off. I remember my parents printing out a list, laminating it and posting it next to my bedroom door. With "All chores are to be completed by 7pm Friday. If not then homework will be done at the table while those who finished their chores watch TGIF". It was that block of shows on Friday night that had Full House, Step by Step and Family Matters. Normally weekend homework was done on Sunday after dinner. We would rush around like mad to get our chores done on time and the ten minute warning was Mom making popcorn and Dad wrestling with the pull-out bed in the sofa.

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2007debtheaven
Message #652 - 05/29/09 12:03 AM

OMG Martivir, I didn't realize you meant you and DH! I have to admit I thought it was rather odd, your thinking so far into the future. LOL! In that case, obviously, disregard anything I said about pie charts or symbols or grids. LOL!

Like you said about my earlier post, how easy it is to misinterpret things on the internet!

(You can always set up a smiley / sticker chart for him though. JK!)

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #653 - 05/29/09 12:50 AM

2007, I should use smiley stickers! When I was in high school I worked with a teacher as her aide. I graded papers, helped her set up for labs( she taught Earth Science and Marine Biology) that kind of thing. Well I went out and bought a cheap pack of smiley faced stickers to put on tests and homework as something fun. And I started putting them on papers that got a 90% or better. And I'll be darned if those stickers didn't motivate kids to do better! We're talking teenagers, some of them 18 or 19 years old. We saw a marked improvement in overall grades and some kids who didn't do their homework started to because they wanted those stupid stickers. I have to say those things were probably up there as some of the best 2 bucks I ever spent.

But DH is very reward motivated so maybe the chore grid with something like smileys would work. At the very least it could help us get into a routine of keeping things up. Though I can see it now. "Dear I have 10 smileys can I turn them in for a batch of brownies with peanut butter chips?"

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2007debtheaven
Message #654 - 05/29/09 01:00 AM

Martivir

I'm not surprised at all! My sister is a retired teacher (she's 13 years older). She used to be Early Childhood, later she became an ESL teacher. She is a total ditz, but she always sent DD (who has processing problems) TONS of stickers. My other kids (who have no problems at school) were always slightly jealous. (DD was ignored by my outlaws because of her problems with school so my sis tried to compensate for that. She didn't ignore my other kids, not at all, but the stickers were always for DD.)  

I think DH could get a good thing going for those brownies, lol!

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #655 - 05/29/09 04:12 PM



Flylady loves to use stickers!  She talks about using them on calendars or task lists to mark completed chores.  I actually managed to do that for a while, putting star stickers on a calendar to show tasks I had completed each day.  I think I stopped doing it when I got a job and my schedule changed.  Things like that have a tendency to disrupt a system.

 

I think turning X number of stars, smiles, etc. into a treat is a good idea, for any age.  Don't forget to reward yourself too.  Maybe order out so you don't have to cook one night, or get a manicure, or buy yourself something you normally don't allow yourself to have, like an expensive coffee or lunch out.  If you're on a debt pay down plan, these small indulgences as rewards for a tidy house will also relieve the pressure of having your nose to the financial grindstone. 

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #656 - 05/29/09 08:57 PM

I'm so glad DH isn't home right now. I got into a cleaning binge because I'm starting to nest and I walked into the baby's room to grab my phone because I've been hanging out in there just sitting in the chair. Well I go in there to grab my phone and I walk out an hour later minus the phone but with one really clean desk fan. I mean this thing hadn't been cleaned in years and it caught my eye as I walked in. I took it completely apart, vacuumed it out, wiped it down and then spend more time trying to put it back together then I did cleaning it. I thought I had broke it. I swear why can't I get the urge to clean something that needs it. Like the windows or the bathroom. Nope I get the urge to clean the fan that I was debating if I should put it in the Goodwill or not. It's not going there now I can tell you that.

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keriamon
Message #657 - 05/30/09 03:29 AM



Marti, do you reckon it's like a pregnancy craving?  Pickles and sardines... cleaning desk fans?

 

Karen Kingston specifically mentions pregnancy as a time when women instinctively want to clean up and clear out to prepare for the baby ("nesting" is definitely the right term).  New life requires new energies.  And you don't want your precious baby being in a dirty house with bad energies. 

 

Maybe if you moved your bathroom into the baby's room, you would clean it then, LOL.    

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #658 - 05/30/09 04:06 PM

I have to say cleaning desk fans is better for me then the half gallon of ice cream that I wanted last week. Today I'm just going where ever the urge takes me. And right now it looks like outside to clean the windows.

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2007debtheaven
Message #659 - 05/31/09 12:10 AM

The "nesting" instinct definitely exists. That's what I meant by the pregnancy "clichés". Like I said, they become clichés for a reason.

Martivir, it sounds like that fan did need it! LOL! I agree, it's the sort of thing one rarely does though. No worries until you start either making / hanging / washing curtains, or washing windows. (I hope yours aren't too high.) Because apparently keeping your arms up high for long periods of time moves the baby down.

LOLOLOL at Keria's suggestion at moving the bathroom into the baby's room!

I'm getting such a kick out of these "nesting" posts! Bringing back old memories, for sure!

Martivir, for years your MIL has been giving you all this stuff you DON'T want. Have you tried redirecting her energies towards stuff you DO want, with the baby coming? Maybe a glider, or a rocking chair? Send her on a mission, lol.

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jillbean_1978
Message #660 - 05/31/09 12:50 AM

I'm not sure what is going on with me. LOL I have been sorting and passing items on to either friends or charity for days now!!! And it feels great.

I was able to get Karen Kingston's Clear your clutter with Feng shui and it def got me going. The best part is the house feels cleaner even though it's not really. I have 4 toddlers here, not likely to be 'clean' of toys unless they are sleeping. I went to the dollar tree(I love that place!!) and got some underbed storage bags/boxes. I know I'm not suppose to store anything under there but in this house that is very valueable space for us. So I am gonna at the very least keep it clean and organized. I also got on my hands/knees to 'mop' the bathroom floor. LOL It's small. But I really should think of getting a mop.

Ok back to cleaning. Well, putting away. I got 19 FREE bath towels the other day. I gotta get them put away now.

[Virgil Showlion]

starmaker7777
Message #661 - 05/31/09 01:58 PM



Hi Everyone!

 

Well i did promise to come back and share another story with you ladies ~

 

Before i even knew anything about feng shui, back in the old days, in my previous relationship, I really wanted a double closet made, opposite the bed. I wanted 2 huge floor to ceiling mirrors doors, that i could slide open and shut. The effect i thought i was creating was that it would 'double' the size of the room! Very cool ~ anyway, life got worse and worse, my relationship deteriated and eventually i found out that my partner was sleeping with other women~ It was a nightmare situation ~ after i kicked him out of the house and my life, I needed something to take my mind off things and began reading about feng shui ~ I was horrified when i read that by placing mirrors at the foot of your bed symbolises inviting a third party to join the relationship!!! ~ LOL That's when i started to believe there might be 'something' in it so it encouraged me to find out more~ Obviously ever since i read that i will not have a mirror at the foot of my bed! LOL (oh and i also read that my house number reduced down to the number 1 which means it was a house that was better for an individual rather than a relationship!)

 

So that was a kinda 'bad introduction' to feng shui for me ~ but then i began to 'activate' one or two of the directions in my house ~ i was alone, with two kids, so decided to activate my 'helpful people' area as i sure was needing some help coping emotionally! 2 hours later, someone turned up at the house to sell me something, it was someone i met once before~ he said hello and i offered him a coffee, explained that i had been reading about feng shui and that when i had some spare cash i was going to buy myself a 'money plant!' ~ he rolled his eyes and said 'Oh you don't believe that stuff do you?' ~ i shrugged my shoulders and said 'who knows!' ....a few hours later, he came back with a very small money plant in his hand and said ' you know what? I don't know if it will work but I couldn't stop myself from buying you one!' I was delighted!!! Said a huge thank you and off he went on his way ~ ! LOL so i sat down at my kitchen table and thought ~ hey that was wierd, i couldnt afford to activate my wealth corner, so i activated my helpful people corner instead and now i have my wealth corner activated!!!! FREAKY!!!

 

LOL....and so how can i not believe? ~ I will tell you one thing ~ that is the one plant that i MAKE SURE it is taken care of, i have about 5 plants now from that one that was given to me! That plant is my little 'miracle worker!' hehe! I have more stories but will post some later....

 

As for the earlier comment about negative thinking ~ I too, have my negative thoughts but last year i made a real effort to learn about the 'law of attraction' - that the thoughts that you think are what you attract into your life ~ I swear by it, that it works! But that is a whole other subject!!!! You can manifest the things that you want with your thinking...and if you are not careful you can manifest the very things you don't want with your thinking too ~ so please try your hardest to correct your thoughts when you realise they are negative....(it is so much easier said than done though!!!!)

 

Starmaker777

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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starmaker7777
Message #662 - 05/31/09 03:09 PM



I got to thinking about the 'duck' comment ~ ' should you go out and buy ducks, when you are not really into them?' LOL Well the obvious answer would be NO! Cos you should only put things in your home that make you happy and joyful ! However ~ i do have another story that may or may not help you choose what to do!!!

 

Ok ~ i HATE frogs! i hate them as little jumpy creatures in nature and i don't like them as 'so called adorable' little ceramic ornaments either! YUK!!!! 

 

So anyways ~ For the past 3 years we have rented a small but managable apartment. Each apartment building has four apartments - 2 upstairs and 2 downstairs. The doorways to each apartment are directly opposite from each other. Well obviously the doorways are very important in feng shui, so i generally kept it uncluttered. Then our new neighbours moved in opposite our doorway, the were totally clutterbugs...it was a nightmare to come out of clear doorway and see their 'carp' ~ like their bike for instance! ~ so i knew i couldn't put up with it and got the property manager to write their usual letter about keeping doorways clear etc - so a few days later the bike had gone ~ and in it's place was a HUGE ceramic Toad/frog - bright light green and extremly UGLY! The first time my daughter came home from school and saw it at the top of the stairs she nearly fell backwards it was so ugly!!! So i would quietly fume to my husband about how we had to put up with their idea of 'decor' on our own front doorstep and how ugly it was!...Well from April until August we lived with it facing us day in and day out.....Then he got two friends....a frog that sat on a mushroom and did a bit of fishing and another frog that was Bright blue....So here we were with 3 frogs ~ two facing down stairs and one facing our front door....So anyways ....i got an email in my inbox from a feng shui site that said ~ if you wish to bring money 'springing forth' into your house, you should place 3 frogs facing your front door, from your yard and if you wish to stop the flow of money from leaving you, you should place a turtle facing the back door or yard....

 

So I told my husband and the kids about this and we all giggled when i told them that i needed them to 'secretly turn the frogs' to all face our front door as this could bring lots of money to us....hehehe~ well of course, everyone was daring everyone else to go and do it....and gradually day by day the kids and my hubby were slightly moving the frogs to face our front door.......and actually with the idea that frogs could bring money into our house...i found it alot more bareable to look at the huge ugly one!!!...little tiny bits of money came to us in different forms....i started saving a fortune with using coupons and shopping differently ....things were ticking along nicely....

 

Then In December we had a knock on the door from another neighbor asking us to look at buying his apartment....no way did we want to buy an apartment however, this did make us look at 'houses for sale in the area....We realised we would need a nice hefty sum for the deposit but how would we raise that kind of money? Well the local government was running a scheme to help first time homebuyers and would help with a deposit if your credit scores were good....so we thought we would give it a go....we were awarded a nice hefty sum of money to help with purchasing our new home....and are eligable for the tax rebate back next year....We just moved this last week in to a beautiful new home!!!!  It is the most beautiful house and much much bigger than our old apartment...it was also 100,000 dollars under the previous sales price!!! and is only 3 years old....I no longer have to look at those 3 ugly frogs anymore....but if you think i wont go out and purchase some for our own front doorstep...you would be WRONG!!!

 

So maybe you would prefer frogs to ducks?

 

Now we have moved here, i am looking at our South East directions (for the wealth and prosperity...) the upstairs is the master bathroom white/silver/with the bath right in the most southeastern

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keriamon
Message #663 - 05/31/09 03:23 PM



Jill, I wouldn't worry about storing things under the bed right now, so long as it's done neatly.  No one can get rid of all their clutter in one go-through, and some of us live in houses just a bit too small even for the stuff we do want to keep and use fairly regularly.  I keep stuff under our bed too.  Karen mentions keeping clean linens under the beds, but I would also argue out-of-season clothing if you have small closets and can't store two seasons together.  And in some cases you don't even need to buy boxes; put your out-of-season stuff in your suitcases and stash them under the bed.  Suitcases are probably the equivalent of empty boxes, which is to say excessively yin; they're usually better not empty.  I learned suitcase nesting from my mother, and so most of our suitcases have other suitcases and bags stored in them.

 

(oh and i also read that my house number reduced down to the number 1 which means it was a house that was better for an individual rather than a relationship!)

One is also a house associated with creativity.  Now here's something freaky for you: the house I lived in from the age of 6 until 17 was 1603 - reduces to 1.  My grandmother's house, where I stayed every other weekend (and had my own room), and lived on three separate occasions is 118 - reduces to 1.  The house my parents built and where I lived from age 17 through 22 is 280 - reduces to 1 (not only that, but the city let my mother pick the house number since it was a new construction and it was the first house on the road).  My apartment for 3 years in college (whose number I don't remember, but I looked it up once before, when I was doing this experiment) reduced to a 1.  My husband's house, where I now live is 3619 - which reduces to a 1.  When I first did this, I went back and re-added all the numbers to check and see if I had done it right.  Then, on my way home, I was adding up people's numbers on their mailboxes to make sure that it wasn't some number trick that everything would always reduce down to a 1.  Of the random numbers I surveyed, 1 wasn't any more common than any other number. 

 

You'll note that he lived in this 1 house before I came along, and that I've always lived in 1 houses.  So it's not impossible for someone to find a mate who lives in a 1 house, but I think you have to find someone who is a 1.  There have been two divorces in this house since it was built, so that may be a sign that 1's are not naturally condusive to relationships, but clearly I'm a person who thrives in them!  And my husband has lived here like 18 years.  When he got divorced, it was the only thing he wanted to keep, and he worked very hard to keep it.  So there's something about it that draws him to it as well.  When we get to looking at properties and houses to buy, I'm going to check the address and make sure it's a 1! 

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starmaker7777
Message #664 - 05/31/09 03:27 PM



oh...what happened to the rest of my post??? LOL I will try again...

 

Now we have moved here, i am looking at our South East directions (for the wealth and prosperity...) the upstairs is the master bathroom white/silver/with the bath right in the most southeastern part ~ and downstairs is a VERY DEPRESSING bedroom with Dark Grey paint and a toilet and shower and closet...To me it would seem that the previous owners were some how depressed? They did lose their home and the bank reclaimed it and they stopped making payments.

 

So the first thing i have done is put my largest wealth plant in the North Position (career) to signify money in abundance in the Career area ...Which also happens to be our Front Door too...which i believe lines up perfectly with the Bagua...Front Door is in the MIDDLE front position and the house is a pefect rectangle shape on both floors - so no missing areas -....I also put outide a watery blue coloured ceramic pot with some colourful flowers, we have an almost Black front door (which is good for Career Area) - Blues/Blacks/Water and wavey lines....are good here aparently....

 

And the first two rooms i will concentrate on with be my two South Eastern corners of the home....The Grey Bedroom will be painted and will be an office for us...I shall add my wealth cures as i go along....And my two bathrooms in that area, has its plugs in firmly in place, toilet seats down etc, no bad plumbing or leaks...and doors are left shut....And that's about the best i can do..for now...oh and i added a purple shower curtain to the 'grey bedroom' straight away!!!!...I am going to enjoy watching the magic that feng shui can bring to this home!!!

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starmaker7777
Message #665 - 05/31/09 03:40 PM



Hi Keriamon

 

It looks like you were posting at the same time as I was!

 

That is pretty incredible about the 1 house! I bet you are an incredibly 'independent' person!!! I think that may be where the divorce/breakups come into the idea of a number 1 house, as to be independent can clash when you are supposed to work as a 'team' together and both people want their own way!!! However, i think if two people totally respect each other's independance it can work out pretty well for both parties....!!!

 

The previous apartment was 11 - and this home is a 7 - So i will have to look into a 7 home....

 

Nice to meet you !

 

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jillbean_1978
Message #666 - 05/31/09 10:22 PM

Starmaker- That is very very interesting about the frogs. I have a gnome thing. Hope that isn't bad. We have several right outside our front door. Which faces west. Our home is almost a complete square except for the back left corner, which is the abundance/prosperity corner. The only thing out there is our AC unit and the opening to the crawl space under the house. I know it's a bit of an issue so I think I am going to go by rooms more so than whole house.

We are 98% done with cleaning the garage. And I am so happy. The garage is in the Creativity area of our property. I have been wanting to get back into my crafts so maybe this will help.

Now I just gotta figure out what to do with the front door/hallway. It's the career area and my husband lost his job in Jan. and has since been working part time at a fast food place. He's an x-ray tech. so def been hard on him to be positive about life. Our door is an ugly beige and the hallway I painted a bright beautiful orange when we moved in. Our living room is orange as well. Anyone have any tips for the career area? I am planning on getting to our library this week to see if they have any books. I'm not too hopeful though. They didn't even have any Dave Ramsey books.

Thanks!! I love this thread. It has helped me soo much more than you can imagine.

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #667 - 06/01/09 01:22 AM



Ack, Jill!  I just looked it up; orange is a major no-no color in the career section!  No earth tones (yellows, oranges, browns, beiges) there at all!  And no earth elements (dirt, rocks, flowers, most plants).

 

Here are the things which are good for a career section: black (this is the color of the bagua), undulating shapes/waves, mirrors, glass, water elements (pictures of water work too), round items, symbols of your life path (since your husband works in the medical field, maybe some Norman Rockwell of a doctor taking care of a kid).  Metal and white (which symbolizes metal) are also helpful, as metal creates water (use these elements where water won't do).  So the best color for the entranceway would be white (since black is clearly not an option in wall coloring).  You might stencil (or use wallpaper border) a wavy pattern around the top in some other color (blue would work, since it is connected to water).  If you have room, a pretty little fountain (preferably of glass or something black--avoid rocks or plants, which are earth elements) would make coming into the house pleasant and help boost that section.  If you place a mirror, don't place it opposite the door, because that's generally bad on your chi, forcing it to bounce out as soon as you come in.  The only time it sometimes works to have a mirror opposite the door is if you have a neighbor or T-instercetion of the street across from you that's so negative you feel like you need to bounce any incoming chi back out.  But under normal circumstances, it's not a good mirror placement; on a wall perpendicular to the door works fine.   

 

A glass front door would should work well, but replacing doors is expensive.  Black and red are the two most auspicious (outside) door colors for feng shui, but don't paint your door either color if it clashes with your house colors.  You could paint the inside (back) of the door blue, which would look just fine with a white wall with blue trimmings and would help boost the career section on the inside. 

 

If you can't afford to repaint the orange room right away, you can try and negate it with wood elements (which uproots and destroys earth).  Wood furniture, wood picture frames, potted trees (the only acceptable plant in this area), pictures of trees, wicker furniture or baskets, etc.  You don't have to buy new, just move something from another part of the house, even if it's just temporary until you can repaint.  You will need to put the wood stuff out to cut the orange, and still put out metal or water (or blue and white colors) to try and boost the career function. 

 

If you are really short on cash or time, you can put black (career color) and green (tree color) construction paper in hidden spots around the area to try and cut the orange and boost the career.  Hide the paper on the back of pictures, under rugs, or stick them up inside a coat closet or to the underside of a table.

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jillbean_1978
Message #668 - 06/01/09 03:22 AM

Keri- That's so not cool. LOL No wonder we are having career issues. White walls in this house are a big no no. LOL We have 4 kids living here under 4 yrs. So I will save some pennies and look for a blue. And leave the trim white. About mirrors, we have a mirror in the living room that is right in line with the front door. But it's a different room. Does that matter? The mirror is in the wealth area for that room. But you can see your self walking in the door...kinda. A lamp is in front of it. For now I am going to put paper behind the pictures that are in the hallway. See if that helps.

Another question. If I am doing by room, should I put the same items in each room for that area? Example: The back left corner in our kitchen is the abundance area I put our money jar on top of a mirror. Should I do that in every back left corner of every room? Or do different things in each room per area? I really hope that makes sense to someone, because I am not sure it makes sense to me. LOL Thanks!

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Shelly527IN
Message #669 - 06/01/09 07:01 AM



My fave is red flowers by the front door (which I originally started doing to offset the bad Feng Shui of our neighbors's HUGE tree looming directly opposite our front door).

 

I've been thinking about getting flowers to put by the door, but wasnt' sure of a color.  Red will be perfect. I also have a tree directly across the road from my front door.  I have a spider plant by the door and (fusia) four o'clock flowers near the porch.

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Shelly527IN
Message #670 - 06/01/09 05:10 PM



Or if you have more than you will ever use (like 24 tubes of toothpaste--no joke, I've read about it). 

 

 

keriamon--- I have a bunch of toothpaste that I know that I'll never use.  I got it for free and I will either donate it or make gift baskets for family members w/ low income that will be happy to get it.  I did this last year and my older brothers appreciated that more than if I went and bought a $50 gift.  

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starmaker7777
Message #671 - 06/01/09 08:09 PM



Hi Jillbean_1978

 

Kerimon is absolutely spot on with Career Area information ~ On the bagua ~ which always takes the Front Door as the Career position ~ It would be the wrong color scheme to have ~ however ~ and get this for the 'confusion between the two methods'....if you have a FRONT DOOR THAT OPENS TO THE WEST...ORANGE WOULD BE THE PERFECT COLOR!!!  It would actually become your " children and Creativity area!!!!' ~ so therefore the part of your house that is in the NORTH position would be your CAREER AREA.... i know this is confusing as the two methods are totally different... I hope i am not stepping on Kerimon's toes by talking about following the 'compass positions' rather than the bagua....as i know there are contradictions....

 

All the information that kerimon gave you may wish to place in your North part of you house instead! Just an idea...but everyone has to follow their own feelings and intuition if it feels right to them or not personally....

 

oh and i am not sure about the 'gnomes' for feng shui ~ do they face inwards or outwards ~ just out of curiousity??? i would imagine that if they were in your 'creative' and 'children' area ~ they might be cute additions to the family!!! hehe!!!

 

Kerimon....I am certainly not claiming to 'know it all !!!' as i too am learning over the years!!! Funnily enough our Career Area is full of Orange!!! LOL but i did put a wooden table there and a wealth plant, so i hope that helps diffuse the situation! I too am going to repaint the Front door black, the outside of the house is grey, and the plant pot holders are a 'watery blue' colour...I am hoping to put a few cures there to get myself a job after the summer is over and the kids are back to school !!! Well...that is the plan for now!!!

 

My Upstairs bathroom is finally kitted out in a wooded green and leaf theme! looks nice and has a few plants in there ~ takes away some of the 'stark white' on the walls....I am just gonna paint my grey depressing room a golden yellow ~ also in the SE position...so i think that should be ok???

 

Well better go and check on dinner ! ~ so much to do!!!

 

 

 

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2007debtheaven
Message #672 - 06/01/09 09:30 PM

Starmaker, I'm enjoying your stories!

I finally got DH to spend about an hour in the basement today! He switched out the last set of shelves. The new Ikea ones are really roomy. So I was able to reorganize a bunch of stuff. I can't do any more until DH reorganizes his tools. At least most of his stuff is out of DS1's room now, even if some of it is still on the storage room floor. I'd say we're about 75% done. It wouldn't take more than a few hours to finish but getting DH to work in the basement is like pulling teeth. DH has *promised* to do his tools before next weekend. 

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #673 - 06/02/09 04:45 AM

I've been thinking about getting flowers to put by the door, but wasnt' sure of a color.

Red is generally a good accessory color because red corrects chi-flow problems.  Large amounts of red, such as red walls, are only appropriate in the fame section, or on the front door (because the red blocks problems from coming in the house). 

 

Karen Kingston actually mentions spider plants by name as not being good plants for two reasons: namely because the spiky leaves cause cutting chi and because the offshoots droop down, which contributes to depression in people already prone to having it.  A plant with little "daggers" pointing out right by your front door could send the signal that you don't want visitors, or that you're grouchy and unfriendly.  Cactus also falls into the same category.  However, Karen Carter says that cactus and other spiky-leafed plants are actually appropriate in your fame section, because their spikes are a flame element.  So, if you and no one else in your house has a problem with depression or low spirits, you might want to move your spider plant to your fame section in your house (it's going to be the middle of the wall, directly opposite whatever side of the house you enter).  Be careful not to pair it with a lot of other downward-hanging elements, such as other trailing/ivy-like plants, low-hanging light fixtures, pictures hung lower than eye-level to the tallest person in the house, etc. because all of that can cause depression, low spirits, or a feeling of being oppressed and down-trodden. 

 

As for plants around your front door, try some with chi-neutral round leaves.  I hung out a basket of red impatiens last year on our front porch and they were quite pretty; I need to replace them because I miss them.  You just had to water them about every two days, if there was no rain, and they were fine.  They like some shade, which makes them great around porches (or, in my case, hanging from the tree that grows up through our deck). 

 

White walls in this house are a big no no. LOL We have 4 kids living here under 4 yrs

You know, they do make paint that's washable!  Which, regardless of what color you paint the entranceway, I would strongly suggest, because even without kids, entranceways always get dirty.  People have a tendency to bang things along the walls as they try and get in and out of the house and make scuff marks, etc.  And dirt is a big no-no in the career section. 

 

The mirror is in the wealth area for that room. But you can see your self walking in the door...kinda.

That doesn't sound like a good location, both because it's still bouncing chi out, because there's a direct line-of-sight from the front door, and also, you're not supposed to have mirrors that block any part of you when you are standing in front of them.  Obviously you see yourselves every time you come in the door, so that counts as standing in front of it.  But if you only see half of yourselves, that can cause bad chi.  Mirrors hung too low, that cut off the top of the head can cause headaches or make you feel light-headed or that you can't concentrate.  A mirror hung so that you are only seeing half your body (vertically; it's okay if you only see the top half of your body or even just your face in a small mirror) could also cause problems; you might feel like you've got no right-hand-man to help you out, or that your better half is not supportive, or that you only feel like you're halfway there, or like half a man, etc.  Apparently a lot of our little sayings like that come from an instinctive or unconscious tuning into chi problems.  I will occasionally run across turns-of-phrases which date back to the middle ages ("easier said than done" goes back to at least 1552, I found out last night), and many of our phrases have similar translations in other languages. 

 

Mirrors are water elements and they double whatever they reflect and also can bounce chi.  So your mirror can be doubling whatever you bring into the house--which if you only see part of yourselves, you could be doubling the problems of being

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keriamon
Message #674 - 06/02/09 04:47 AM



"not all together," which, of course, isn't a good way to feel in your career section.  See about moving the mirror; you can put it in the career section as a water element, just don't allow it to face the door.  In fact, I think a mirror near the door is a good idea so you can check your appearance before leaving home; it helps make sure you look your best before stepping out into the world.  Just make sure that it's hung so that neither your nor your husband has his/her head cut off by the top.  It should be eye-level to the taller of the two of you, and the entire head should fit in it for both people.  And make sure it's not reflecting any junk piled up in front of it or across from it.  Don't have coats and hats and shoes opposite of it, or it will make the room look twice as cluttered. 

 

If I am doing by room, should I put the same items in each room for that area?

From a feng shui perspective, it doesn't matter if you have a change jar on a mirror in the prosperity corner of every single room, plus the house, plus the property.  But it sure will look weird to anyone that comes over to visit!  LOL.  From a decorating standpoint, it's better to change up your decorations from room to room, although staying within the appropriate feng shui elements, of course.  For instance, where that mirror is hanging in your prosperity room, you could replace it with a picture of a river or ocean--anything where water is the focal point.  Watercolor paintings are also appropriate, or be really obvious and put up a picture of money or a bank.  The dominant color is purple, but gold and silver work, because of their connection with money, and blue works because of its connection to water.  Black is also useable as an accent color because that's what you want to be--in the black.  Metal holds water, so metal elements also work because they help "create" water.  Oh, and red works as an energizer (just don't overdo, because you don't want to be "in the red"), and green works in America, because we associate cash with green.  Moving or flowing elements work in this section too, so water fountains, aquariums (with live fish) or even small animals (I read about a little girl who moved her hamster's cage to her money section and encouraged her hamster to run in it's wheel to increase her money; just don't put the dog bed or cat perch here, since that's where they go to sleep; make sure it's an energetic animal and its cage is kept clean daily).       

 

Star, I'm not worried about you stepping on my toes.    We're all here to learn and help one another.  However, I think orange is not a color that works for Jill since her husband lost his job.  It's not like X-ray techs should be unemployed; they're always in demand.  Now, if he had been a real estate agent, it might not be the orange, but someone as eminetily employable as he is should have a job.  So I think that their house must be aligned with the door rather than the directions.  But I'm going to look up the directional thing and check our house out; see if anything pops out like a big neon sign.  I was running through the rooms of the house in my head, trying to figure out if we have any really bad things in certain areas, but it was rather depressing, seeing how almost 100% of the house is a mess.  It doesn't matter which direction it's oriented to in that case, because everything's messed up anyways!   

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Shelly527IN
Message #675 - 06/02/09 05:08 AM

keriamon--- Thanks, I'll keep those things in mind!

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #676 - 06/02/09 03:02 PM

Morning ladies. I must say it's hard to get things done when people keep bringing more stuff in. I've been trying to work on the baby's room but stuff is going in faster then it comes out. I also think too the my MIL is trying for some kind of world record for most stuff bought at Babies R' Us. Sunday I was convinced she was pulling numbers out of nowhere to justify her spending more money. That I would "need" at least 3 strollers( she says we need a jogging stroller even though the only time DH and I even get close to jogging is running from the front door to the car in the rain), that you need to change a kid's outfit at least 5-7 times a day, and that you need everything the stores tell you to buy and then some. It isn't really helping the de cluttering or the cleaning effort since now I have baby stuff everywhere. And the little guy isn't even supposed to get here for another three months. I've also noticed that since the stuff started flowing in I've been having more headaches. But I'm not sure if it's because of the all the new clutter or the fact I now have to deal with my MIL coming over at least twice a week and trying to get me to do things her way.

But some good news. I finally got a desk! This is the first area that I can call mine other then a half a closet. I can finally get all my writing and craft stuff in one spot. There was only really one place to put it but I like where it is because I can see most of the house from my chair. No more moving craft projects in the middle of something because we have company coming over and need the coffee table or eating around my latest project because I set up shop in the dining room.I think I'll be more likely to complete my projects if I'm not constantly moving them around the house.

And I love DH's way of avoiding his mother. Since she trys to give us lots of unwanted advice he has now started shredding. So lots of papers are getting gone through and then when she starts rambling( usually about five minutes into the visit) he just says he needs to get back to going through papers and fires up the shredder. It's been working rather well because even if she and I are in another room the place is small enough and open enough that it's hard to talk above the sound of shredding paper no matter where you are in the house. It's a win-win for me. Less boxes and bags with old papers and I no longer have to deal with her latest crusade against my parenting( and he's not even here yet). 

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keriamon
Message #677 - 06/02/09 04:44 PM

That I would "need" at least 3 strollers( she says we need a jogging stroller even though the only time DH and I even get close to jogging is running from the front door to the car in the rain), that you need to change a kid's outfit at least 5-7 times a day, and that you need everything the stores tell you to buy and then some.

Marti, just remember, it's your house and your baby.  I agree with you that one stroller, at this time, is plenty.  I like those that are multi-function: where you can unhook the wheel base and then you have a carrier, or you can snap it into a base and it's a car seat.  Those seem like such a good idea, because you never have to physically move the child (which, when they are finally asleep, is the last thing you want to do!).  That also cuts down on clutter because instead of having a stroller, a car seat and a carrier, you only have half a stroller and half a car seat and a carrier. 

 

My mother said that she liked a cheap, umbrella-style stroller for me more than anything.  She actually propped me up in it using rolled towels when I was still an infant.  She swore by a stroller like that because, she said, it could go anywhere.  She hated those huge strollers with big wheels and storage like a shopping cart.  She said they were too hard to get over curbs and through narrow walkways in stores that weren't designed for shopping carts.  I think, after my kid was too old for the baby carrier, I'd switch to an umbrella stroller, because what my mom says makes sense; I've seen so many women struggling with those jumbo strollers, and some of them are downright rude, barreling through places not meant for them, stripping clothes off racks and running over people's feet.  Plus there's having to wrestle it into the trunk of a car.  Slim and lightweight makes sense when you're already having to push around the weight of a kid. 

 

And apparently, when I was a baby, I lived in one-piece sleepers.  My mother said they were the easiest things to get me in and out of, and unless I threw up on them, she only had to change them once a day.  No socks, no shoes, no top, no pants.  Those supposedly become quite annoying to put on and off a wriggling baby constantly; they don't look nearly so cute then.  I apparently didn't wear actual clothing until I was old enough to walk and really needed the shoes (unless she was taking me for a picture or to a special event, and then she'd dress me in something cute).  Hmm... may be why I love footie pajamas to this day. 

 

If you've already expressed to your MIL that you just don't need any more stuff, then just smile and thank her when she hands it to you, and express anything you don't want for yourself to charity.  Yes, even before the baby comes.  They grow so fast, you won't need but a handful of outfits anyways, because there won't be time to wear more than a few before they're too small.  I would see if I could find the location of a battered woman's shelter and drop off anything (incluing extra strollers) that I didn't need or want.  So many women who leave abusive relationships leave with nothing but the clothes on their backs and what their kids are dressed in.  They would be SO delighted to have clothes and equipment for their babies.  And can you imagine how great new stuff would make them feel?  Not that used is not appreciated, but I bet getting something new would make them feel like a million bucks.

 

Your MIL has probably bought so much stuff, she won't remember what all she got you and will never notice if some of it isn't in your house.  You could always brush her off with a vague, "I think it's out in the garage/storage; we had too much stuff to put in the house all at once; I'm waiting until the baby comes" and then change the subject. 

 

Less boxes and bags with old papers

ROFL.  You know how, when your eye skims over sentences, you can sometimes rearrange the letters so that you see words that aren't really there?  When I first just glanced over this, I saw, "Less boxes and old hags."  Although, I guess shredding gets rid of both! 

---

keriamon
Message #678 - 06/02/09 04:46 PM



Sometimes clutter clearing can put other people on the defensive.  I'm not sure if your MIL has always been the way you describe or not, but sometimes, when people see you clearing out a lot of stuff and transforming your life, they get defensive because they're secretly afraid you might clean THEM out of your lives as well.  Clearing clutter can open up new energies in your life, and some people can sense that, and worry that you might go off on a different path that they can't follow.  Some people might even say they don't know you anymore.  But if you feel better about yourself, then it's good if they don't know you anymore!  And if that friend or family member is trying to hold on to the old, depressed, dependent, lackluster person you used to be, then they DO need to be cleared out too.  Not that you can really clear out family members, but you can at least downgrade their importance in your lives, see them less, etc.  And some people you know, that are clutterholics, also worry that they are losing a companion in mess, and fear that you will look down on them when you are cleaned out.  The same thing can happen if two friends are overweight and one starts to lose weight; the other friend will start to worry that the thinner friend won't like them anymore, or will try and make them lose weight. 

 

You have to watch people trying to sabatoge your efforts because they feel insecure.  You MIL might be trying to fill your house back up with junk in order to take you back down to a level that she feels comfortable with.  I would counter her intentions (regardless of the motive, you don't want the stuff!) with beefing up the family section.  That can help your situation with her, as well as make your relationship with DH stronger so you can present a united front.  But don't place things with an intent to wall your MIL out, but rather with the intent that she step into a proper grandmother role, which is loving, not controlling (you might put up a picture of Mother Teresea, for instance, as an example of the type of grandmother you want in your child's life).  You might also beef up your skills and knowledge section with the intent of boosting your self-esteem.  When you are really in control of yourself and confident, it makes it easier to deflect other people's attempts to control you.  When you're your own person, no one can control you (or your house).  And giving things away that you know you don't need/want will also boost your karma, so something good will come back around for you. 

[Virgil Showlion]

3jsmom31
Message #679 - 06/02/09 05:30 PM

Every time I see this post.  I go around and pick up 27 things.  I have the kids pick up 27 things each and have them working on their room 27 things in the morning, and evening to get it straightened out.  It is wonderful and since I saw it, I am going to go start in the bathroom and see how far I get.  Sometimes I just keep going long after the 27, but I want to thank you guys for making this thread pop up so I have to clean, lol.   

---

abundanceandprosperity
Message #680 - 06/02/09 05:31 PM

I don't know about others, but I'm pretty bad about being negative to myself.  As in I do something, and instead of being proud of my accomplishment, I beat myself up for having not done more, or I look around and despair of how much further I have to go and how it seems like I've made such a small dent.  FlyLady calls that "stinkin' thinkin'" and I'm majorly guilty of it!  I'd appreciate anyone's tips on how to stop doing it.

 

Meanwhile, I'll try and keep my spirits up by listing what all I've done today.  I burned trash, washed a sink full of dishes, cleared off three armloads worth of books (now neatly stacked away until I can take them to the used book store to trade), pulled the Goodwill bag out of the closet (the better to load it down some more) ...

Keriamon, I read your above post yesterday and it kept coming back to me in a way the makes me think I need to share with you my thoughts on the subject.  I really hope I don't give advice you didn't ask for!  It is just that I have read your posts for years and like everyone else on WIR, appreciate your contribution to the community.  It seems that you post a lot, and you have a lot of wonderful advice to give. 

So, I will try to explain my thoughts and please know this is coming from a caring place. I just wonder if all the positive feedback feeds you and makes you feel good therefore reinforcing you to keep contributing to the conversations, sometimes to a degree that interferes with your life.  Maybe the things you need/want to implement in your life (house clearing, job securing, new home...) aren't happening at the rate you want them to because you don't get a similar return of positive feedback. 

If this is the case, a trick that I use myself may work for you.  First, start each morning (first thing before you get out of bed) with journal writing, could be gratitude for what you have accomplished, your health, etc. then keep doing your list of accomplishments throughout the day.  When you need a little positive encouragement, post those accomplishments here and we can applaud you. 

As for negative thinking, we attract what we put our focus on.  Try turning your "stinkin thinkin" around, each time making a positive statement out of what had been a negative one.  You are a valued WIR and I know I would love to see you accomplish all of your dreams!

 

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #681 - 06/02/09 05:38 PM

Oh she's always been like this. When we first moved out and she started talking to us again( remember from the other thread about them not talking to us for stupid reasons then talking to us again when it's convenient for them?) she noticed that we were getting rid of alot of stuff that we had duplicates of, didn't like/need, or wanted to get so that it was both of ours rather then stuff left over from when I lived with my ex. So she went on a "de-cluttering kick" of her own. And then brought over all her old clutter to our house because "you might need it". Thankfully once she realized that everything she gave us was going to the City Mission( minus the nasty broken junk she tried to pass off as good) she stopped. And now that stuff she gives to my parents. But for them it never ends up in the house. She tried to put it in their craft room and dad just took it straight out to the car and put it in the trunk. And then drops it off at the Mission on their way home from work. It's literally two minutes out of their way. Dad did notice that when she does bring stuff over she always asks if Mom wants to look through it first. But right now I am accepting everything with a smile and leaving the tags on the clothes and only putting together the stuff I really wanted. But I know she's not keeping track of what she's bought because she got me the exact same outfit twice. Just different sizes. If she can't remember what she bought me two weeks ago I doubt she'll remember what she bought six months from now. She was trying to get me to register for a highchair( she's getting everything off the registry so at least I know that it will be something that I like) the other day. I told her that I was getting one from my cousin and my mom was dusting off the one my brother and I used for her house. She said I needed a portable one as well. She bought me one over a month ago. The one I had on the registry that she begged me to start.

I think that right now I need to switch more into damage control mode rather then project mode.

---

keriamon
Message #682 - 06/02/09 09:43 PM

Maybe the things you need/want to implement in your life (house clearing, job securing, new home...) aren't happening at the rate you want them to because you don't get a similar return of positive feedback. 

That's a possibility.  My husband doesn't compliment much.    There's also this thing where I like helping OTHER people.  Helping myself is a bit harder to do.  For instance, now that I'm home, I feel obligated to cook for my husband every night he works.  But when I work, I not only don't cook for him, but I don't cook for myself, either.  And if I didn't have him, I wouldn't be cooking the stuff that I cook now; I do a much better job for him that I would do for myself (eat more veggies and less pre-packaged things).  I don't like cooking (I do like eating!), so I won't go to the effort for myself, but I will for him.

 

Of course, other people's problems and solutions seem so much clearer looking in from the outside; it's always harder to see our own problems and solutions when we're in them. 

 

  She said I needed a portable one as well.

Yeah, like you're going to haul that, a kid, a stroller, a car seat, a carrier and a diaper bag around.  Those carriers that I mentioned are made to sit on a restaurant high chair; they have notches that sit right down over the arms of the chair (which adds to their coolness factor greatly).  Once a kid is big enough to sit up on its own, it can sit in the high chair that the restaurant provides.  I don't like those portable ones that attach directly to the table; they give me the willies looking at a kid sitting in them; I'm always afraid it will fall off with the kid still in it.

 

Maybe instead of donating this excess stuff, you should take it back for a refund and then split the cash between your child's college fund and a savings account so you can pay your in-law's light bill when your MIL runs their finances into the ground.  Geez!  Imagine, though, how much money would be in your child's college account if she had only spent a few hundred on something nice and useful (like a crib) and had put all the rest of the money in an interest-bearing 529 account.  She sounds like my aunt, who has shopped her way into the poor house.  She has wasted so much money on new vehicles and jewelry and cheap knick-knacks that she could have put into savings.  Now she's unemployed because of health reasons and can't get disability; if she'd just start pawning/selling stuff, she could still live for quite a while without a worry.  But it's an addiction; she can't get money in her hand, but she has to spend it immediately. 

 

All you can do is protect yourself.  Like you said, damage control.  Keep her clutter from spilling into your life and hope she can get a handle on her own.     

---

jillbean_1978
Message #683 - 06/03/09 01:58 AM

Ladies I have some confusion. I went to the library and checked out all 3 books they have on Fung shui. One of them being The Complete Idiot's Guide to Feng Shui and it states that mirrors are NOT used Feng Shui. But Karen Kingston's books say to use mirrors. Is there different Feng Shuis?

I stopped reading the idiot's guide because it got into math and stuff. LOL I will use math for figuring my checkbook but that's about it. So could someone please help me understand even though I have several books in front of me? LOL

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #684 - 06/03/09 02:48 PM

Jill, for the purpose of this thread I think we're following Karen Kingston. I sometimes check out websites but I'm mostly here for the de-cluttering and cleaning. I mean you can do all the feng shui cures you want but if your house isn't clean and organized then they aren't going to help. Changing out a picture isn't going to help anything if you still can't find your electric bill in the pile of papers spilling off your dining room table. Plus I think that there are so many different methods of directing energy out there and Feng Shui is just one of them. But all of them start the same way. Clean up and ditch the excess junk.

Keri, my MIL likes to talk about all this money they have and how she can do whatever she wants with her paychecks. Yet their house is falling down around their ears, she thinks budgeting is calling the credit card to see how much she has left to spend and all financial problems are FIL's fault because he's too cheap. All I can say is I deal with the mother because I love the man that much.

[Virgil Showlion]

Shelly527IN
Message #685 - 06/03/09 03:34 PM



But I know she's not keeping track of what she's bought because she got me the exact same outfit twice. Just different sizes. If she can't remember what she bought me two weeks ago I doubt she'll remember what she bought six months from now

 

 

Martivir--- Your MIL sounds like my sister who tries to buy people's love. She can't just check a registry and buy one or two things or $50 worth of stuff...........she just keeps buying and buying.  She in credit card debt, filed for bankrupsy several years ago and still shops as a hobby.   She was in a car accident a couple weeks ago totalling her car.  She has  $8,000 or so after paying off the car and a few other things.  She told me that she was thinking about paying off a credit card.....then in the same breath she starts talking about looking for a plasma TV to replace her (according to her) perfectly good TV. She just wants a plasma.....which would be fine if she didn't depend on over-time to make ends meet.

 

As for me, I pay credit cards off each month and have only $220 or so left on my SL.  I HATE.....make that DESPISE being in debt.  But sister thinks I'm crazy for taking my pets for their yearly shots (she can't afford that!) and for buying name brand HBA products (FREE afters ECBs at CVS or very cheap elsewhere w/ coupons).   I guess it's all a matter of perspective. 

---

keriamon
Message #686 - 06/03/09 05:11 PM



Maybe an idiot wrote the book?  LOL  I've never heard of any form of feng shui that doesn't use mirrors.  Mind you, there are BAD mirror locations; they can be a double-edged sword if you're not careful.  It doesn't hurt you if you DON'T use them, especially if you are new to feng shui (because, like I said, they can harm as much as help if used incorrectly), but no book or website I've ever seen/read on feng shui said that mirrors had no effect/weren't used. 

 

The traditional school of feng shui can involve a lot of math, as well as compass directions.  To me, it's really not for your average bear; it's for someone who has had a lot of training under the tutledge of a master.  The form that we're following is what I think of as door-centric, because where you place the bagua depends on where you come in through a door (to the house or to an individual room).  The traditional form is compass-centric in that the bagua is aligned with compass points and does not rotate from room to room, regardless of where you (and energy) enter the room.  Some people refer to the door-centric form as "Western" feng shui, but from what I have read, it too was developed in China and a few hundred years ago.  Apparently the only thing that makes it "western" is that people in the west use it to feng shui their houses because it's easy enough for a lay person to learn; it's not like we have easy access to traditional feng shui masters in Tennessee or Idaho, etc. 

 

Maybe it was even invented in China as a rebellion against "scared knowledge."  In the West, it used to be that all Bibles were written in Latin and lay people were discouraged from owning one, even if they did happen to speak Latin (which most did not).  It was thought that lay people should not read the Bible for themselves, because they were not educated on how to read and interpret it properly, and they might draw the wrong conclusions and form a heresy.  Of course today, that notion is ridiculous, but in the late 1300's and through the 1500's, it was an idea worth fighting and dying over.  But some people thought that religion should not be sacred knowledge, kept in the hands of a few.  The Lollard heresy was all about bringing the Word of God to the masses so that they could develop a personal relationship with God and not have to work through a priest as an intermediary (of course, this also lead to Protestianism).  There's a reason why the first thing printed on the Gutenberg Press was a Bible.  Printing the Bible in native languages (such an English, French and German) was a way for all people to potentially be able to learn religion on their own. 

 

It's possible that this door-centric form of feng shui was a similar sort of rebellion, in that someone, someday said, "Hey, anyone ought to be able to do this on their own; you shouldn't need to spend thousands of yuan paying a priest to do it for you.  Let's make feng shui something that the common man can understand and practice.  Feng shui should be simple."  (You could make comparisons to the full traditional form and gothic cathedrals and High Mass, while comparing the simple form to the early Protestant churches, which were devoid of all decoration.) 

 

You also have a problem in that the traditional form often uses figures based on the "head of the house."  In the West, who is the head of the house?  If you live alone, or are a single parent, then that is obviously you.  But what if you are married?  I'm not willing to concede that my husband is the head of our house, just because he's a man.  You're talking to a woman that kept her maiden name in marriage, so no, I'm not willing to base everything in the house on him.  Some could argue that the traditional form supports heirarchy in the home.  Which really isn't a problem in China today, which is still traditional in that respect, but it is a problem in the West where a couple is considered equal partners.   

 

Personally, I think the simple, door-centric form makes more sense.  Why do we clean clutter?  To simplify our lives.  So why would we then us

---

keriamon
Message #687 - 06/03/09 05:13 PM



Personally, I think the simple, door-centric form makes more sense.  Why do we clean clutter?  To simplify our lives.  So why would we then use really complicated feng shui to decorate?  I don't think your home is very harmonious if you have to sit down with a calculator and compass to try and figure out where the best place to hang a new picture.  That would make decoarting an onerous task, not something that makes you feel better.  I like the idea of simple feng shui for a simple life.  If you can afford (and can get) a traditional master, or if you like the layers upon layers of knowledge of traditional feng shui and you want to study it further, than that's fine.  But if you are just an average sort of person, trying to make life a little better, then stick to the simple form.  Modern life is complicated enough.      

---

keriamon
Message #688 - 06/03/09 05:27 PM

I guess it's all a matter of perspective. 

I would say it's a matter of priorities.  Obviously for your sister, her entertainment wants (plasma TV) are more important than her pets' health needs (shots/checkup). 

 

Like my aunt, who has let a water leak ruin the subflooring in her bathroom, but she can't afford to buy the materials to let my uncle fix it for her (free of charge).  But every time she's got some money in hand, she goes shopping; her stuff has already spilled into my late great-uncle's house because she can't fit it all into her house.  All that stuff and holes in her bathroom floor.  My uncle said he'd be afraid to even use the tub because the only thing that's holding it up is one floor joist directly under it. 

 

You can't help but feel sorry for people whose priorities are that screwed up--who would rather have stuff than have what's necessary to lead a healthy, secure life.  Dave Ramsey talks about his life before he got out of debt.  Said he had a "hole in his soul" and just kept buying stuff to try and fill it.  But the hole was spiritual in nature and couldn't be filled by material things, no matter how much he bought.  Marti's MIL, your sister, my aunt... they're all people with holes in their souls that they can't figure out how to fix.  I'm not saying that they need to get religion and start going to church (some people with holes in their souls DO go to church, they just don't get anything out of it), but they need to have an awakening to what's important in life, and learn to love themselves as they are. 

 

Karen Kingston says we have people in our lives for a reason, even people that we are polar opposites of.  And that what we do can affect them.  You can always feng shui (namely the family area) with the hope and intention that whoever in your life has a spiritual problem will come to see the light in the best way possible for them. 

---

jillbean_1978
Message #689 - 06/03/09 06:57 PM

Yes I am reading Karen's book and like it much better than the idiot's guide. I simply want and need simple. LOL

I've got to beef up our career and wealth corners a lot. So I am just trying to figure what I need to do to those areas. That aren't going to cost us a dime.

---

seahorse989
Message #690 - 06/03/09 07:27 PM

keriamon:  That is sad and scary about your aunt letting her bathroom go.  My mom is that type also.  She let a small leak ruin the bathroom floor and it cost a lot to fix when she finally did it.  In her case I think it was something that needed tightened or replaced on the toilet and she was too cheap to get a plumber for the small problem and so it became a BIG problem.  If I remember when I go to the library next I will look for the Karen Kingston book.  I banned myself from the library after a $6 fine for a book.  Sadly it was a feng shui book that it happened to.  I managed to spill tea on it and stained it. 

[Virgil Showlion]

Shelly527IN
Message #691 - 06/03/09 07:30 PM

keriamon---- Thanks, priorities is what I meant.  Yes, I do think my sister is trying to fill a void in her life with "stuff". She has low self-esteem.  Maybe fixing my family area will help her (and the rest of my family).

---

keriamon
Message #692 - 06/03/09 09:37 PM

Maybe fixing my family area will help her (and the rest of my family).

Well, it won't hurt them any!    Although, if you are interested in helping her, address the self-esteem problem.  If it's your cup of tea, try going to a religious service with her (even if it's a first time for both of you!  Despite my misgivings, I tried going to church for Lent, and I found a very nice church to attend that I actually look forward to going to on Sundays; I was surprised).  Also included in "religious" are things like group meditation.  Even yoga is a type of mental clarifier, as well as an exercise.  And I loved tai chi classes when I took them.  You could also look into self-help seminars, workshops, or support groups.  Maybe if you helped her explore some things of a spiritual nature, she'd find something to plug her hole.   

 

 I banned myself from the library after a $6 fine for a book.  Sadly it was a feng shui book that it happened to.  I managed to spill tea on it and stained it

Hmm, either a sign you need to own the book instead, or, more likely, that you need some serious help around the house.  Clutter and disorganization contribute to accidents like that.  A lot of people think that they themselves are clumsy, when, more often than not I think, it's a matter of the environment contributing to clumsiness.  Shoot, it wasn't me being clumsy that nearly caused me to fall in the kitchen last night; it was the cat underfoot! 

 

I've got to beef up our career and wealth corners a lot. So I am just trying to figure what I need to do to those areas. That aren't going to cost us a dime.

As far as feng shui cures goes, "Move Your Stuff, Change Your Life" is a good book.  It goes through each section of the bagua and tells you what helps and what is bad. 

 

Prosperity colors:

 

Primary: Purple, Gold

Secondary: Red (because it energizes), Green, Blue

 

Prosperity Elements:

 

Primary: Water (represented by mirrors, glass, pictures of water, water color paintings, real water, undulating/wave shapes color blue)

Secondary: Wood (represented by wooden furniture, real trees, round-leafed plants, pictures of trees or forests, vertical stripes and columns, color green), Metal (represented by coins, metal furniture, metal decorative objects, round shapes, color white)

 

Prosperity's Sister Section (it helps if you also enhance this section as well, as they feed on each other):

 

Helpful People

 

Prosperity's Magic Number (arrange elements in multiples of this number, if possible, for great effect):

 

8 and 9 (9 is always a magic number in feng shui)

 

Prosperity Killers:

 

Dirt and dust, broken/non-working items, pictures or reminders of bad/hard times (not a place for Depression-era photos), trash cans, dead plants (including dried arrangements), fireplaces/stoves/microwaves, toilets and bathrooms.

 

Everyone has some leeway when it comes to moving their things around.  You can swap up pictures, and sometimes even move some furniture around.  Of course, you can't move things like bathrooms or fireplaces, so you have to correct those as best you can.  A lot of water around a fireplace puts out its fire; red around bathroom fixtures (namely around outgoing pipes) can help stop the chi from draining away, while mirrors can bounce chi out of the bathroom and keep it from being lost there.  Some people also hang crystals to bounce or block chi. 

 

The very cheapest feng shui cures involve sticking up colored paper.  Because colors have vibrations (physic's string theory involves vibrating strings of quantum matter and 20+ dimensions of space-time, so color vibrations sound a whole lot less crazy in comparison!), you don't have to necessarily see them in order for them to work (just like you don't have to see an instrument being played in order to hear music).  Poor man's feng shui can be nothing more than some colored construction paper hidden all over the various bagua sections.  You can put it behind pictures, under mattresses or chair cushions, under furniture, behind furniture, under table tops, on the i

---

keriamon
Message #693 - 06/03/09 09:40 PM



on the inside walls of closets or doors.  That can be a good way to introduce something (like the color purple) which would otherwise clash with your decor.  Just make sure that you also cure any problems you can.  In the case of the fireplace, blue, not purple, would be the best color to cure/balance it.  Red is the best color for correcting bathrooms.  Also make sure that you don't have any decor which is symbolozing the exact opposite of what you want.  As I mentioned before, photos of people during the Depression (like standing in a bread line, or living out of their car) is really, really bad for the prosperity section (and pretty much any other section).  Don't have pictures or items that remind you of poverty. 

 

Career colors:

 

Primary: Black

Secondary: White (because it's metal), blue (because it's water)   

 

Career Elements:

 

Primary: Water (represented by mirrors, glass, pictures of water, water color paintings, real water, undulating/wave shapes color blue)

Secondary: Metal (represented by coins, metal furniture, metal decorative objects, round shapes, color white)

 

Career's Sister Section:

 

Fame/Reputation

 

Career's Magic Number:

 

6

 

Career Killers: dirt/earth elements (most plants, rocks, etc.), squares, earthtone colors (orange, brown, beiges).  Also be careful that any pictures do not reflect the sort of job you would NOT like to have. 

---

Shelly527IN
Message #694 - 06/03/09 10:10 PM



If it's your cup of tea, try going to a religious service with her (even if it's a first time for both of you! 

 

 

keriamon---- I go to church once or twice or week, but my sister doesn't go that much in a yaer.  I do think yoga and exercise classes might be okay for her. Thanks!

---

2007debtheaven
Message #695 - 06/03/09 10:40 PM

Martivir, she is literally killing you with kindness.

You need to be firm. I can think of two options: either you say thank you with a smile on your face, turn around, and return anything you don't want.

Or you tell her (again with a smile) thank you we appreciate it but we have too much, DH doesn't want to live with all the clutter anymore. (I know I said DH, not you.) So can you please help me donate it? I'm too pregnant to take it all to the mission by myself. How kind of you to help me with it.

YOU NEED TO TURN THE TABLES ON HER. START KILLING HER WITH KINDNESS!

I know it's shocking but I think this situation calls for drastic measures. I know it's REALLY hard but if you could do it once or twice or three times max, I think you'd be done with this problem forever. You have to rehearse it, glue the smile on, and say it.

DH and I have been together for many years. Sadly our parents are all gone now, and have been for about 10 years. But even still sometimes we still agree to play "good cop / bad cop" for each other when one of us feels we need it. (I'm always the "bad cop", lol.)

I truly think that this is what you need to do, Martivir. I know it's hard, we all do. But if you don't, this will be the color of your life for many many long years, and you and your DH and your babe deserve better than that.

That's what getting married and having a baby is about, it's reforming one's nuclear family. Now it's you and DH and the baby, and the crazy MIL is, unfortunately for her, the outsider. Same for your mom who decided where to put your artwork.

They are very present, obviously too present. But they both obviously adore you. So it's up to you to "grow up" and set the limits, and hopefully you can still keep them present in a way that works well for your family. Long story short, you need to "train" them.

I know it's not easy but either you or DH need to put a stop to all of this "helpful control", fast.

If all else fails, can you move? I'm serious. You are a very kind person. Too kind, for sure. And I'm sure I'm not the first person you've heard that from.

I truly wish you the best.

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abundanceandprosperity
Message #696 - 06/04/09 12:53 PM



I am so glad to see this thread active again!  I look forward to catching up on all the progress and positivity each morning. 

 

Keriamon, I am often surprised by how grounded you are.  I am thankful you were able to see my comments as observations from a kind place.  It takes a really strong person to be able to look at oneself critically.  As you said, it is easier to see the problem and solution from the outside.  The comments you have made about not treating yourself as well as you treat others (cooking for dh but wouldn't for yourself, moving into his place and allowing him to take up most of the space, living with the x's old furniture) is important (in mho) to notice.  You are a good person and are worth valuing greatly.  I have run across a lot of affirmations (searching online) that deal with valuing oneself.  Maybe they would work for you.  You are in a really exciting place in life right now with an opportunity for a new career, new home and new phase in your marriage.  It seems that any action you undertake with feng shui or affirmations would be especially critical right now. 

I am even a bit envious of your situation.  DH and I want to move, want new careers and changes in our relationship but with the whole miscarriage situation we are delayed again into sticking out our current jobs/location for a while longer. 

When I need to motive myself into action/change I find new knowledge helps.  Recently I picked up a new exercise/recipe book that motivated me to get into physical shape.  The exercise and dedication helped in other areas of my life and aided in feeling power over my daily life. 

 

What do you all do to motivate yourself toward positive change?

[Virgil Showlion]

abundanceandprosperity
Message #697 - 06/04/09 01:03 PM



Martivir, tough situation with the mothers.  2007dh suggestion about moving isn't too far from how I handled my family situation.  I live my life completely differently from my parents (and their huge extended families). If I hadn't moved 1000's of miles away at 17 I would likely still be frustrated by their involvement in my life.  The physical distance between us has allowed us to be closer.  When we see each other it is fun and enjoyable, we aren't around each other enough to resent them. 

I know I wouldn't have the career, savings, or persona that I do today if I had stayed in my hometown.  The opportunities weren't there and my "familial obligations" would have distracted me from pursuing the life I want to lead.  If I lived close to my family it would be even more important than it is now for DH and I to spend time establishing life goals and plans for achieving them because without those goals we would be distracted by our families and things would fill our life that we didn't want in the first place.

Best of luck as you find your way through this situation. 

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #698 - 06/04/09 04:00 PM

I think I am going to sic DH on MIL. Thing is that she just doesn't listen to me or anyone else. I've been telling her EVERY time that she comes over with stuff that 1. we don't have the room, 2. my kid I decide what he needs and 3. I don't want it. Moving far away sounds great till I remember that she has always told her kids if they moved away she'd be there for two week long visits at least twice a year. He was livid at her last night because she brought over more stuff. I think the time is ripe for the two of them to have a little mother son chat. I'm easy to ignore because I've been the evil one who stole her son since day 1. He's not so easy to ignore because she depends on him a lot when FIL isn't around.

But on a better note. I've been having some problems because I just can't do things the way I used to anymore and I finally broke down and told DH what's been bugging me. I've been letting some things go because I'm having problems lifting things, or bending down, or getting up off the floor in general. He's agreed to help more but I need to tell him exactly what I need. So we plowed through some of the recycling last night( we're giving up on getting it to the in-laws, too much hassle because DH always ends up two hours late from work when he has to pick up the bin) and while I know it's not good for the earth, we're just going to toss stuff out. However we do have a place down the street that is collecting paper to raise money so all of our papers and cardboard is going there. Thing is since the towns around here use it as a source of revenue they closed the close by drop off centers. So the closest one is an hour away. And DH has promised to help me Saturday. He's even canceled his usual plans. I'm in heaven because I can't get on the floor anymore to go through the last of the totes and I can't lift them to my level either.

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keriamon
Message #699 - 06/04/09 05:42 PM

Marti, have you thought about advertising on Craiglist?  We had some old appliances and junk around the house and I advertised in the free section that anyone that wanted the metal could come and get it.  And someone did.  We ended up having two truckloads full of stuff!  They took it into town to a recycling center and made some money that way.  It might be that someone would be happy to come pick up your metals and maybe even your paper to recycle it and make some money.  Think about the number of people out there who could use a little extra cash, but are having a hard time getting a job.  Then that would free both you and DH of the obligation and then you wouldn't feel bad about not recycling (although if you can't get someone to take it, it's okay to trash it; getting it out of the house is the most important thing at the moment). 

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #700 - 06/04/09 05:54 PM

Keri, all of the papers are going to a church that collects them to raise money. You know I could ask my brother if any of his friends collect scrap metal. We do have some scrap dealers closer then the recycling place. And if I can find a way to crush them then we might not have as big a storage problem as we do now. I'm not so worried about the pop cans because we have the bottle deposit. So once we get a bag of those DH takes them back for the couple bucks it brings. Now I wonder if they have can crushing thingies. When I see people wanting scrap metal on Freecycle they always want the cans already crushed. And it could be a good way to release some extra frustration.

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keriamon
Message #701 - 06/04/09 09:07 PM

Now I wonder if they have can crushing thingies.

Yes, there are things made to crush cans.  My husband used to own one (we got rid of it because he almost never drinks out of cans anymore).  His was a metal unit that mounted on a wall.  Insert can, pull handle down, can crushed.

 

Of course, you can always do it the redneck way for free, which is throw all your cans in the driveway and run over them.  When you feel like you've got a good enough pile together, shovel them into bags.  I kid you not, I've seen people do it that way!!!

 

www.squalorsurvivors.com/squalor/measuring.shtml

 

This is a website I've found for people who have REALLY bad messes.  I hate to say it, but when I looked through their squalor list, our office/den was bordering a squalor level 2!!!  I'm working on cleaning it up today.  It can make you feel better to look at some of the pictures, though, and realize that as bad as you've got it, some people's houses are still worse.  And also to realize, if they cleaned up that big of a mess, there's no excuse for your smaller one.   

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Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #702 - 06/04/09 09:52 PM

I saw those ones. All the ones I saw are meant for aluminum cans which around here we can take back to the store and get a nickel for each eligible can. I'm looking for one a bit more heavy duty for the cans that like my peaches come in. I'm sure if I look around I can find one. Or have one of my brother's friends make me one. He's one of those people that when you need something, anything, done he's got a friend that can do it.

And all of my rooms are at a level one. I've got the piles of stuff creeping up, the just general untidiness of it all. Nothing a good weekend of solid cleaning can't handle. But who really wants to spend two full days cleaning? I do watch shows like Clean House to try and motivate me. It usually goes one of two ways. I either start trying to get things under control again or I look at my mess and think "Well at least it's not as bad as theirs" and  put it off till tomorrow. But right now I have a load of dirty dishes in( they seem to multiply while we sleep) and I figure that a few five minute spurts of cleaning a day is better then looking that the mess and trying to wrap my head around how long it would take to do if I tried to tackle everything in one day.

[Virgil Showlion]

keriamon
Message #703 - 06/04/09 10:24 PM



Hmm, I don't know that I've ever seen one that crushes canned food cans.  Those are a lot thicker. 

 

A lot of people swear by baby steps and doing something small so you feel accomplished.  Being pregnant, that's really going to be a requirement for you, because a big overhaul is not going to be possible (nor recommended).  But for me, I've found that several little chores amount to not a lot to feel great about.  So I'm working on doing things on a more massive scale.  Like cleaning off the deck.  It took me a couple of days (would have only taken one if I hadn't been still trying to get over my cold and wasn't able to do as much), but I got it all cleared off and since it's very large, the cleanliness is very obvious.  Likewise I made a massive dent on the upstairs of the garage and it is quite obviously better when you go up there (not to mention that having two truckloads of trash is quite obvious). 

 

I feel like I'm more than halfway through the den.  I just managed (still not sure how) to get the treadmill in here.  Needless to day I need to rest after that (too much exertion makes me cough again).  I'm thinking about moving our desks too.  Another website/blog I looked at showed some desks that are made to be used from both sides, so you can have two separate office spaces.  While we don't have that kind of desk, we do have two desks we can put back to back.  That would make better use of the center-floor space and reduce the amount of stuff we have pushed up against the walls (and windows).  But it will take some measuring to make sure that the desk and treadmill both can fit into the middle of the room, because, obviously, the desk can't be moved when we want to put the treadmill down. 

---

mrsx
Message #704 - 06/05/09 03:42 AM

I have a habit of dragging DH into daily maintenance. He'll be vegging on the couch while I'm running around & I'll say "dishes or litterbox", "laundry or walk the dog", etc... It means do it very soon & if you don't pick you're stuck with what's left. It seems to work.

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Shelly527IN
Message #705 - 06/05/09 05:22 AM

Today I got my stockpile moved into a closet in the basement......it was in the hall closet in the center of the main floor.  I got about 30 magazines bagged up to recycle.  I also cleaned some stuff on the front porch...broken items and 2 dead cacti!  (I completely forgot they were there----XSIL's).  I added a very pretty butterfly windchime outside the front door.  

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2007debtheaven
Message #706 - 06/05/09 10:46 AM

This thread is so motivating! I'm glad it's active again too.

DH kept his promise and reorganized his tools on the new shelves. So I just took all the wood DH has accumulated (it does come in handy, but there is too much) out of DS1's room and put them in the storage room. Now we have to sort through those, and the "vertical stuff" corner (tripod, left over carpet rolled up, etc). The idea being to put the wood in the "vertical stuff" corner. Which is already full. I hope I can get DH to do that with me this weekend.

DS1's room is finally looking like a bedroom again. :-)

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #707 - 06/05/09 03:01 PM

2007, the first thing that popped into my mind when you said you had leftover carpet and wood was making a kitty scratching post. I think I need to go over to my parents' house and harass their cats.

Since loading the dishwasher isn't as bad yet as unloading it, I asked DH to unload it before he came to bed last night. He did with a wee bit of grumbling but then again dishes is far from his favorite chore. One of these days I'll remember to ask DH to pick up some of those crock pot bags. Scrubbing that sucker out after making anything with BBQ sauce is pretty much guaranteed to take at least 15 minutes unless I soak the thing for an hour then pop it in the dishwasher.

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keriamon
Message #708 - 06/05/09 05:49 PM

 So I just took all the wood DH has accumulated (it does come in handy, but there is too much) out of DS1's room and put them in the storage room. Now we have to sort through those, and the "vertical stuff" corner (tripod, left over carpet rolled up, etc). The idea being to put the wood in the "vertical stuff" corner. Which is already full. I hope I can get DH to do that with me this weekend.

Hehe, if it's an option, make your "vertical stuff" corner coincide with your family section of the storage shed.  Wood and vertical/columnar shapes are perfect there.  The best alternate would be in the fame section, because wood fuels fire.   

[Virgil Showlion]

2007debtheaven
Message #709 - 06/06/09 04:52 PM

Keria, it's the basement, not the shed (not that it matters). In fact there are two places for vertical stuff: the main one I was talking about is in the love/marriage section, and a small one in the health and family section. I had no choice, those are the only places in the room without wall-to-wall shelving. And, looking at the bagua, I see our two ladders are in the helpful people / travel section (metal is ideal there, so that's good!) 

Anyway, it's done! DS1's bedroom is empty of all our carp except for a set of bookshelves we don't know what to do with. There's just one small box and one small bag on the floor of the storage room that DH still has to go through. He's promised to do that before next weekend. You'd think he'd just want to finish, but no. 

Martivir
You cracked me up with the kitty scratching post, lol. No kitties here, I'm allergic.

I've got a bunch of stuff to give away in the trunk, I'll go within the next couple of days.

---

keriamon
Message #710 - 06/06/09 06:35 PM



It's a shame you don't live anywhere close, because I'd love to have some bookcases.  We just overflow with books all the time, and that's even with weeding them out for the used book store a few times a year. 

 

I'm almost done reorganizing our den/office.  I'll finish it off today while my husband is at the gun show (selling his ex-wife's rifle that she left here 8 years ago).  So, one more thing out of a closet, and one more thing of his ex's gone.  I've got someone interested in her old desk, so hopefully she will come today and pick it up.  Someone came yesterday and got all three of our old CRT monitors and as they were leaving, they noticed our old weedeater in the truck with the rest of the trash and asked if they could have it for parts.  One less thing to go into the landfill.

 

So my husband has this large sword collection.  It's been moved all over the house several times, always in a lump.  It's been under the bed, stacked up in multiple corners, on a shelf, etc.  I was looking at in the floor yesterday (I had to get rid of the shelf it was one because it was too unstable and I wanted the space back for the treadmill) and trying to figure out what to do with it now.  If only we had a tall, heavy umbrella stand, I could stand them all up in it.  I racked my brain, trying to think if we had anything like that, but I couldn't remember seeing anything.  I went out to the garage, just in case, and looked around upstairs and downstairs.  Nothing that vaguely looked like an umbrella stand.  Lots of metal scrap, though; my husband could probably make one, only I knew better than to expect he'd get it done this side of judgment day. 

 

Then I looked at the trash cans (the outside ones).  No, no trash can in the house.  That would look terrible.  But swords on the floor look terrible.  What's my motto?  "Everything looks better with gold paint."

 

Oh, yes, I went there.  I used up the last of my gold spray paint, painting a big, black trash can gold (we had one with a lid that leaked, so it really wasn't useful as an outside can anymore anyways).  I spray painted the bottom red to correct whatever problems might arise with a can full of swords, and brought it in.  The only place I really had for it was our creativity section (swords and other weapons are best in fame because they're a flame element), which is a metal section.  So you have this big gold trash can (so it looks metal) with a bunch of metal swords in it.  The inside of the can is still black, but if swords represent fire, because of their pointy shapes, then the black (water) should douse them.  If not, hopefully the red bottom on the can will contain any problem to the can.  So hopefully they're now neutral, with just the "metal" can in creativity.  Of course, as medieval re-enactors, swords make perfect sense as a creativity element, because it's our hobby. 

 

---

Marti loves her lil monkey
Message #711 - 06/06/09 06:43 PM

Afternoon. I just can't seem to stop moving today. I guess I'm majorly nesting. I'll do one thing like get a box put away( still have stuff in boxes from when we moved at the end of March), sit down for a few minutes then head off and put all the soda cans in a bag so that DH can take them back to the store. So far I've managed to get the laundry caught up( made DH carry the baskets back and forth from the laundry room), the kitchen is caught up except a couple of things that are soaking, two more boxes/totes gone through and put away, and three less boxes cluttering up my house. And when DH saw me cleaning up the coffee table he decided to clean off his desk.

Yesterday MIL called from the store and wanted to know if I wanted anything for the baby's room. After biting my tongue I got an idea. I said sure then told her to pick me up one of those organizers that's a bunch of small colorful plastic bins on a rack. I've seen them advertised as toy organizers. If she wants to continue to buy me stuff then I don't feel bad asking her to buy me something to organize all the stuff she's bought. Now I can get the baby stuff off the shelves that normally hold all my craft stuff. And when it's no longer filled with bottles and binkies, the kid can use it to stash his toys.

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jillbean_1978
Message #712 - 06/06/09 06:51 PM

After cleaning out the garage and a lot of stuff(junk) from the house I think I have hit a block. I simply just don't have the energy to organize anything else. So it's seems like it's more cluttered than it was. Because I pulled everything out and don't wanna just shove it back into closets and boxes.
 Did get Dh talked into refinishing the free dresser I got from freecycle. He is outside right now. And said I would have it in my room by Monday at the latest. That will help with getting our room organized. And I guess the rest of the house is just hard to do right now with everyone here.
 I did find a dream catcher wind chime the other day...I had Dh put it above our bedroom door..is that a good place? Is there a book out there that has a list of decor items that are do's and don't's? LOL

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jillbean_1978
Message #713 - 06/06/09 06:58 PM

Keriamon- I have been wanting to ask this for a while now, and I hope I don't offend anyone. But are you and your Dh in the SCA?

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keriamon
Message #714 - 06/06/09 07:53 PM

But are you and your Dh in the SCA?

 

Yes, we are. 

 

If she wants to continue to buy me stuff then I don't feel bad asking her to buy me something to organize all the stuff she's bought.

Of course, I wouldn't feel bad, at this point, if I had her picking me up some organizers and shelves that WEREN'T for the baby's room, LOL. 

 

And pass some of that energy this way! 

 

After cleaning out the garage and a lot of stuff(junk) from the house I think I have hit a block.

Oh, I hit one of these this past week!  I got all my big, easy stuff done and then boom, block.  I also think I liked cleaning up outside, but now I'm mostly down to cleaning up inside, which is what I've been avoiding the most all along.  I mean, the porch was easy to clean up.  There were only some tools to go back in the garage and a bit of trash to throw away; most of the labor was just sweeping it clean.  But now I'm in the house, where we have more stuff than space.  And as FlyLady says, you can't organize clutter.  So it doesn't feel as if I'm accomplishing nearly so much, because, to some degree, I'm just pushing stuff around--stuff that is either needed, despite the lack of space, or stuff that is my husband's that I can't get him to get rid of.

 

Still, after realizing that our office/den was getting on towards Squalor Level 2, I started working on it.  I did a few hours' worth of work Thursday, another couple yesterday, and I'm probably an hour away from finishing it now.  There's still too much stuff for the room, but it's useable and neat and we can walk freely around in it.  I'm also going to rearrange our pictures and things in here to be more feng shui appropriate, since we spend a lot of time in here.  This is also where I do my job hunting.

 

You could go ahead and apply some feng shui cures and see if they help you motivate to get over your block.  Just don't use mirrors if you're not pretty well clutter-free and physically clean, because they can multiply junk and dirt if you're not careful.  But any other feng shui tool is okay to use.  In fact, the first thing I would recommend is either painting your trash cans (or their bottoms, inside or out) red, or putting some red paper in them (you can print or color paper red; it doesn't have to be construction paper).  Do this to the trash cans in all the rooms of your house.  Also, tie a red string around the pipes under your sinks and see if you can hide some red somewhere around your toilet (I'm planning on tying a red string around the chain that pulls up the flapper--the thing that lets water out of the tank).  If you have access to the pipes around your tub and clothes washer and dishwasher, also tie a red string around them, or slip a piece of red paper under the appliances or in a crack beside them.  Chi is lost through water draining out and trash cans (because the stuff you in the trash all has a little chi with it).  Red restricts the loss of chi, so adding some form of red to the pipes, appliances and trash cans will help your chi from being lost and hopefully give you the pick-me-up you need to get motivated again. 

 

BTW, for anyone who is lost on where to begin clutter-clearing or feng shui cures, it always makes the biggest impact if you start with the rooms you are in the most.  Needless to say, because you sleep there, your bedroom is the number one place where you spend most of your time.  But past that, it's usually a living room or den/office (although some people may spend a lot of time at a dining room or kitchen table, especially if that's where they craft or do work-from-home). 

 

Also, don't forget your personal space at work, which is usually only second to your bedroom in terms of total hours per week spent there.  Even if you have a cube, you can usually apply a few feng shui cures.  For instance, cubes are really bad to situate you so that your back is to the "door," which is about the worst thing you can do in a workspace, from a feng shui perspective.  The cure is to get a small mirror on a stand and sit it next to your computer monit