The kid thread: Planning, pregnancy & parenting

[taz157]

MoneyJenny - Congratulations! We haven't seen you at the MSN Pregnancy board too much.

Sam - I hadn't visited this board too much since I signed up a couple of weeks ago since the WIR board was active. However, its not too active anymore so I'm going to start posting more.

Things are going well with me. Definitely more tired than I usually am. Went to visit some family and friends for New Year's and had a great time. The friend's wife made lasagna (from scratch), green beans, bred, and raw veggies (which I had eaten before without an issue) on Saturday night. Needless to say, my stomach didn't like what I ate and everything I ate came back up. So far, the only time I've gotten sick so far but still no fun. Other than that, I've been eating all the time (it seems). My next appointment is on the 17th. I was going to tell work after my next appointment; however, my boss is going to be out of town that week so I'm thinking of telling them next week. If I wait until the week after, I think it's going too close to busy season and he'll stress even more.

[moneymaven]

Since there is more activity here, I am going to copy and paste:

So I had a huge bomb dropped on me last night at work. My assistant that I have been training for the past 3+ months to do my job while I take maternity leave is leaving the company in 2 weeks! She accepted a job at a local, private university. It's a really great opportunity, but I can't help but be really mad about the timing. I am 33 weeks on Friday, and my doctor is taking me off of my Terbutaline in 3 weeks, meaning DS could arrive anytime thereafter given my preterm labor issues.

I will have no choice but to work, mostly from home, when I should really be on leave. There is no one else at the company capable or available to do my job, and even if there was, there is not enough time to train them. Add to that the owners won't trust anyone else to do it, and it's a big mess.

I am not quite sure how to react at this point. I am trying to be supportive (we are friends outside of the office), but I am really disappointed and saddened that I really won't be able to enjoy my maternity leave like I had hoped. Any suggestions? Have any of you been through something similar? I am sure there is a good, heaven sent reason for all of this, but it's hard to see the silver lining at this moment.

[redwagon]

Why are there 2 threads for pregnancy/parenting? Can one win?

[redwagon]

ps. insmoneymaven - wow, that really sucks. You can't fault them for going to the better opportunity, but talk about crappy timing. Are you going to be working from home or will you be able to train someone in time? You deserve time to focus on just your baby!

[redwagon]

oh i get it now!! someone is copying the old thread over here! that's great! I started reading it from the beginning (I've got a year or more before we TTC so I thought it'd be good research) and was sad it'd get axed before I get to find out about all the babies I've been reading about in utero. yay!

[nasagreen]

redwagon - yes, that is the old thread from msnmoney, there is a good coder that is porting over the thread....just wish there had been enough time for him to do the member threads, the regional threads are not going to get done due to time constraints

[jenna30]

We were almost doomed from the start re: breast feeding. The irony -- Baby E had an awesome latch. He also had a "vigorous" suck.

I had yeast problems from day 1 (he developed thrush later at home.) The yeast made it unbearably painful to nurse, and I had to stop after about 48 hours. His vigorous suck didn't help the matters, either. Even a nurse from the nursery commented about his "powerful" sucking motions. He then took a bottle for about 18 hours to give my boobs a break.

I pumped on his second day, and he started getting breast milk in bottles. Little did I know it, but that totally screwed us.

Long story short... I was pumping almost every 2-3 hours for about 2 weeks... and after getting the bottle so often - he started refusing the breast. I was also supplementing w/formula since I could not produce enough breast milk.

Around his 3rd week, and we decided to go exclusively to formula. I was miserable pumping that often, and still not producing enough to satisfy his hunger. And it was heart breaking to watch him refuse to nurse. He would literally close his mouth, and shake his head side to side. He'd maybe nurse for a minute or two - and the rest of the time, he'd refuse.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Got 6.5 oz, 5 oz and 4 oz yesterday. She ate around the time I do my fourth pumping and I was just too damn exhausted to sit there and try to retrigger let-down.

So far the past few days she has been eating 10 oz while at daycare, so I am keeping up with her and just a wee bit ahead.

Upped the tea to three times a day, blech. It's not BAD, I am just not a huge fan of herbal tea. It seems to be helping or it is all in my head, I don't know.

She got up only once last night at around 1:00 am. We kept her up till about 6:00 and she could not keep her eyes open and we did not have the heart to keep pestering her. We figured pushing back an hour was a good enough start.

Then she woke up to eat at 8:30 and I made sure she ate off both breasts before going back to sleep.

She got up as usual at 4 am for breakfast. I don't mind that as much since DH is already up anyhow and I am awake. I can do a 4 am breakfast. I can't do a midnight, 2 am AND 4 am breakfast!

[stina72]

Gusita-So excited to hear you will be meeting Baby Brett in no later than 5 days, that's so exciting!!
Sam-I had some friends that stocked up on diapers and thankfully they had no issues with reactions, so I am hoping the same for you! I have horrid allergies, and am allergic to pretty much everything nature related, so we probably won't be stocking up since there could be a good probability of a reaction. I heard this tip on another board (for anyone who isn't comfortable stocking up on diapers, wipes, ointment) and it is to start buying gift cards to your store of choice (Target is our preferred, they are all over here and there is never a fee if you don't use them within a certain period of time, etc.) and keep the cards for baby related needs only. We are currently doing $10 a paycheck until we conceive and then will up to $20. If we don't conceive for a while we will probably stop this after a while, but just for now. These will not be used for baby items prior to baby being born either, just afterward. It sounds like a good idea in theory, anybody please feel free to let me know if this is for some reason not good!
Ins-I am sorry to hear about the stress you are having to endure now and will probably have to endure while on maternity leave.
Taz-So glad you are doing well, minus the tired part!
Drama-Glad to hear you are able to keep up with Gwen's growing appetite!
Anyone heard from Meg? I hope she is ok.
I began my 2WW Tuesday, maybe yesterday, but I had a bit of an issue yesterday that may or may not affect conceiving this month. I get allergy shots weekly (as I previously stated totally allergic to entirely too much stuff) and went into anaphylactic shock about ten minutes later. Needless to say my body went through a ton of shock and I had an insane amount of shots and pills. Luckily I work in a hospital, specifically the same hospital I receive my shots, so I was able to get the necessary help ASAP, but still it was pretty bad with the breathing and such. So between this and DH's brother who was supposed to interrupt the fertile window, I'm pretty much thinking this just isn't supposed to be our month, but if it is it will definitely be our miracle baby!

[gardenergirl]

Jenna30 - I've been thinking about you. Hope you are healing from your c-section some-what by now. I had a friend that had the exact same thing happen to her re: breastfeeding. She was breastfeeding, baby got thrush and she developed mastitis. Said it was more painful than going into labor. So I hope you did not develop it. I'm sorry you are not able to breastfeed like you had planned. When you continually offer a bottle to a newborn I think that is just what they get used to and then refuse to breastfeed. Try not to feel bad, there was not much you could do! Don't beat yourself up. Be happy you have a healthy baby!!

drama - don't forgot about ginger ale. I was drinking it quite a bit when I was EBF because I was sick of drinking water all the time too and I hate lemonade.

nasagreen - I hope you are able to move in sooner than 4/1! You don't need that added stress. Try to relax, what will be will be I guess! Just concentrate on the last few weeks of pregnancy. Keep yourself healthy. Stress can make you sick. About two weeks before I gave birth I came down with a terrible cold. My doc was not happy with me. I had to go on antibiotics. It scared me because my doctor got so nervous.

econ - you may have to try out different bottles before you find the right one. Try offering a bottle here and there but not too much because it could cause nipple confusion, and don't do what I did - I offered NO bottles and when it was time for Olivia to go to daycare she was refusing the bottle so we had a battle on our hands. DH got her to take bottles finally but I could not be in the room. Eventually she started taking them from me too but it took a long time.

kgb - glad the job is going well!! Do you have more time now with Avery?

stina - how nerve racking!! Good thing you work at the hospital and was able to get the help you needed. Good luck TTC!!

boo's - Is Virgil still working on copying over the thread from MSN do you know? I see only part of it was copied over. Before I saw you asked him, I had actually sent him a message too to copy it over! LOL. But then I told him to ignore my message after I saw you asked him. Hopefully he's still working on it!

[eternal sunshine]

insurance - OMG I am so sorry you are dealing with that! It is so strange how alike you and I are. I just found out yesterday that my company will not make any progress on permanently hiring the girl I've been training until after April. Well, she is in RIF status (reduction in force) and is scheduled to be terminated in the first week of April. Needless to say she has been applying for other internal positions while awaiting word on this position becoming permanent. I have NO one else I can train and I am not someone who can just be gone for 12 weeks. My company doesn't do work from home....I am very very stressed about what this means for my maternity leave, but my superiors are keeping mum on what they plan to do about it. I've been told that there may be something in the works....but that isn't reassuring at all. With all the stress I've had trying to get this position trained (training one person to find out their put in their 2 weeks notice...and now trying to train this person who may leave right at the start of my mat leave) I have been in a nightmare. I come home everyday near tears...which can't be good for Cole.

I am sending you so many good vibes and hugs...I know how you are feeling and I hate it for both of us!!

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Eternal I would try not to fret about it, it is THEIR problem, not yours. They are the ones dragging their feet about your trainee, they are the ones that don't allow work from home.

No company is going to fall apart because one of their employees went on maternity leave without a replacement. They will find a way to cover for you when you are gone.

Unless you feel that you personally are on the line (like they will find a way to fire you eventually after leave) because of of this, let them deal with it. Do what you can to get as much done as possible and then let them figure out how to handle it when you are gone.

It is your job to get as much work done as possible and train your replacement. It is not your job to figure out how your boss is going to handle things when you are gone because of bad decisions on their end of the stick.

You don't need that kind of stress right now.

Worst comes to worst you have a lot to catch up on when you get back, but a plus side of that is job security because no one else can do the work!

I had this epiphany towards the end of my second trimester when I was making myself ill. My job is not so important that if I don't get it all done and thensome before I leave that the entire lab is going to collapse.

Sure it meant catch up when I got back, but it's been a lot easier to catch up post partum than work myself practically into the grave while pregnant.

[jenna30]

Gardernergirl -- Thanks for the kind words. It's true what they say -- about the 3rd week after my c-section I started to feel better. I can actually lie down and get up on my own, now.

Baby E is 4 weeks old, now. I'm fortunate to be able to stay home for the entire 12 weeks of my maternity leave. Then hubby will take over as Mr Mom (unless plans change in the next 8 weeks or so.) I'm pretty much responsible for his care for about 16-18 hours of the day M-F. I sleep 8-midnight while Hubby watches him, and then sleep anytime Baby E sleeps in the night. Could be 45 minutes or it could be 3 hours (consecutively!)

I remember our first night home was a night mare. I tried to take the night shift on my own, and hadn't yet learned his cues. I just have to keep him well fed in order to up my chances he will sleep for more than 1/2 hour.

I've pledged to read to Baby E at least 1/2 hour a day. I sing to him, sometimes, too. I just feel funny randomly talking with him each time he's awake, so I figured reading would be a good solution.,

Can anyone recommend some good children's books? I really like The Gruffalo, and The Gruffalo's Child.

[jenna30]

I got really lucky on the bottles. Baby E seems to do ok with Dr Browns.

He also seems to be doing ok with the Similac Sensitive. This is our 3rd formula we've tried. He's a little gassy, still, but it doesn't seem to be painful. He's also sleeping better.

I hope this one works.

*crosses fingers*

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Any of the Golden Books series (The Tawdry Lion, Color Kittens, Tootles etc). I just bought Gwen The Pokey Puppy which was my personal favorite. Curious George, Babar (hard to find in stores but you can find him on Amazon), Beatrix Potter, Little Engine that Could, The Velveteen Rabbit, Mother Goose, Aseop's Fables, Hans Christen Andersen, Brothers Grimm, Where the Wild Things Are, anything by Dr. Seuss, Hungry Hungry Catepillar (and various off shoots), Three Billy Goats Gruff.

Then my all time favorite is If you Give a Mouse a Cookie. A close second is the Seasme Street Golden Book: There is a Monster at the End of this BookCan you tell I read a lot?

My biggest grip is the children's classics are getting harder and harder to find. Everything is Sponebob, Disney Princess or some other book designed to sell crap to my kids because hopefully if mommy buys them the book, she willl buy them the toys too. ::rolls eyes::

I don't want Gwen to be reading book after book about sissied up prettied up Disney Princesses (totally ruined them, some of those girls are tough chicks in the original movies!) I want her reading REAL books but I am in a never ending struggle with the publishing industry.

[ladyki]

Jan 4, 2011 22:12:31 GMT -5 Sam_2.0 said:

MoneyJenny - welcome!!
There are some great coupon deals out this week. I am going to get 3 boxes of diapers to start stocking up. I figure if I can get them for a total cost of about $3 each, than its worth it to buy them up. IF the brand just does not work for us, then I can always exchange unopened boxes. ..

That is what I did, both DH and I had diaper showers at work. We got just about every brand out there and in every size. At the beginning I liked all of the brands, but now that she is 5 months old I really like the Huggies and Target brands they just seem a little bit thicker. I still have some pack of the Luvs and Pampers that I want to go exchange either for Huggies or the Target Brand.

[jenna30]

Then my all time favorite is If you Give a Mouse a Cookie.

I like that series, too. I'm giving them to my niece, and we have a few of them. Hubby's fav is Where the Wild Things Are.

Meh. I hate Spongebob, and don't really like Dora, either.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I tried to watch Dora once and I wanted to dig my eyes out with a spoon. Urgh.

Spongebob when he first came out was really funny, now he's just plain obnoxious. Maybe I've just grown up. lol.

DH's favorite is Three Billy Goat's Gruff.

I am looking for the Madeline series, those books are hard to find. I didn't get into them much as a kid but I think they would be fun to read to Gwen.

Then I want to find Raggedy Ann & Andy. I used to have a complete works book of theirs but it got ruined in my parents' basement during a flood.

ETA found Madeline on Amazon. Yay for hte internet!

[jenna30]

I've started a master list of books. Thanks for the suggestions.

I'm going to hit up the library before making decisions about which ones to buy. I'm sure Grandma will be happy to add to his collection.

[poohbiscit1]

I agree with Drama with my favorite being "If You Give a Mouse a Cookie" being on of my favorite books. Another one of mine is the "Bernstein Bears: Spooky Old Tree" although I am biased since I apparently had this book memorized by age 3. I told my mom one night I was going to read the book to her and she was amazed and though I was until she accidentally skipped a page but I kept going as is she hadn't. I find that if you go to Barnes and Noble they have still have a great selection of the older books.

[ladyki]

Jan 5, 2011 11:00:14 GMT -5 @palmettolady said:

QUESTION: When did/is everyone having their baby shower? I'm thinking March 12th, I would be about 34 weeks then. I don't want to be so big and uncomfortable I can't enjoy it but, I don't want to have to too soon either.

Palmetto- I had my shower when about 1 1/2 before my due date. I was still okay and was not toooo big. My shower was something big, I only have one sister, so this was going to be her first niece. She planned my baby shower and paid for just about everything. It was for both men and women. I was even able to dance a few line dances, lol.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

My mom has claimed dibs on purchasing and reading to Gwen the Little House on the Prarie series and Beatrix Potter.

Gwen already has an entire shelf full of books on one of my bookshelves.

I want to get her the Complete Adventures of Curious George and when she gets old enough I am going to purchase her Shiel Silverstein to introduce her to poetry. I swear I have a copy of Where the Sidewalk Ends somewhere. My favorite poem of his is Ladies First!

Richard Scary is another good children's author.

I had all the Berstein Bear books, at least all the ones that were published before I became too old for them. I have no idea where they went, they have to be in my parents' basement somewhere.

The Little Monster books are good as well.

I find that if you go to Barnes and Noble they have still have a great selection of the older books

Really? I found they didn't have shit concerning the older books, at least not stocked in store. I've had to go online to find a lot of them.

[Deleted]

hey Taz! Yeah, I really don't go over to the MSN Pregnancy boards too much. I'm barely able to get here since I'm so busy at work now!

[moneymaven]

eternal - we really are leading parallel lives! I am sorry to hear that you're having trouble too. As I mentioned, this is a very small company, and I am not protected by any federal or state laws for maternity leave. And unfortunately, a temp service cannot do this job. Insurance financing and accounting is highly specialized and I typically handle $2 million a month. No, they will not be willing to hand this over to just anyone, thus training my assistant for 3+ months to do this for just 9-10 weeks.

Plus, I take pride in my work and I don't want to come back to a complete mess that I will have to pickup anyways. I am waiting for her to give her official notice to the owners. After I posted last night, I just sat staring at my computer and just broke down. I am not an emotional person usually, and I just sobbed and sobbed. Add to that my stress about taking stupid maternity photos because all of the photographers that I have contacted don't seem to know how return phone calls or emails. How hard is that, really?

I want to just hide at home and not come out. DH and I have breastfeeding class tonight and our 2nd baby shower on Saturday, so that's not happening.

[gardenergirl]

Oh I'm so upset I could just cry!!! I just learned the store where I buy all my diapers, wipes, formula, all bulk items is closing!! I buy all that stuff from BJ's because not only is it cheap but they take multiple coupons, plus returns if needed are a breeze. I go there all the time on my lunch breaks to get stuff and gas. Now it's closing and the next closest one is over an hour away from my house!!

[ladyki]

Jan 5, 2011 12:08:06 GMT -5 telephus44 said:

Back on today - this sure is an active thread!

Kristi - glad I'll have some else on here trying for #2 at the same time.

Count me in, We will also probably start trying for #2 this month. Just like you I am going to try and not get all crazy about it. Due to infertility issues we took about 6 years to conceive Kiani. I dont want to sound negative but I am not sure how long it will take this time so I dont want to get all crazy about it.

[ladyki]

Jan 5, 2011 12:30:52 GMT -5 yogiii said:

I'm not sure how much I agree with the 6 months rule, I think as a mom you can tell when your baby is ready. quote]

Kiani's dr. gave me the okay to start her on cereal and baby food stage 1 when she was 4 1/2 months old. I told him that I had already started a couple of weeks before and he said that it was fine.

[ladyki]

KGB- Glad to know that your job is great,.

Gusita- woh, congrats, you will soon be holding baly Brett in your arms. Let us know your baby story whenever ou have a chance.

[mommax4]

re books: I agree that the Bernstein Bear books are great. My 3 girls love them and they teach such good lessons. They're particularly good when they're old enough to start understanding the lessons. For infants, Eric Carlye's books (Brown Bear, Brown Bear etc.) are good. I also really like nursery rhymes.

I'm not a huge fan of all the Disney Princess/Dora stuff either, but my kids love it. After age 4, Dora starts to wear off (thank goodness). My mom (who teaches Kindergarten) pointed out that the Dora shows are actually perfectly designed for how kids in the 2-4 year old category learn (constant repetition, basically). Unfortunately it's horribly grating on anyone NOT in that age category.

[regina24601]

Jan 6, 2011 13:07:58 GMT -5 mommax4 said:

My mom (who teaches Kindergarten) pointed out that the Dora shows are actually perfectly designed for how kids in the 2-4 year old category learn (constant repetition, basically). Unfortunately it's horribly grating on anyone NOT in that age category.

Agreed! DH cracked up at Dora while we were in Spain. We turned on the TV one morning while we were getting ready, and he realized that everything was opposite - she talked in Spanish for the most part but threw in random English words every so often. It's equally nonsensical in the reverse order.

1 hour till my doctor's appointment! I don't know why I get so excited - I'm just setting myself up for disappointment when I inevitably hear, "Still 1 cm...looks like it might be a while." *sigh* oh well - fingers crossed!!