Annie7
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Post by Annie7 on Aug 12, 2022 15:55:06 GMT -5
Rukh, I'm in the same ballpark as you regarding salary and expenses. I don't have a secondary income stream. I only have a bit less than 1M in retirement savings. I am also burnt out and worried that it will catch up with me at work soon. But I can't retire for another 9 years atleast based on my numbers. I have a 3500 sq ft home for just me and my dog now. My youngest just moved out this month after graduating and getting a job. I too plan on staying in this house for the next 10 years or so for my dog since I have a fenced backyard. And my friends network is strong here for myself. And I'm just an hour away from both my sons in NYC. If it were me, I wouldn't try to make the 100 year old house be energy self sufficient, etc. I would sell and get a smaller newer house with a yard and maybe renovate that to be energy self sufficient, etc. It will be much easier and cheaper to do that with a new house than with the 100 year old house. IMHO. My ex hadn't done any maintenance on the house. I've been trying to now catch up on things slowly in the past 1.5 years. The roof will need to be replaced in the next couple of years. The upstairs AC will need to be replaced soon too. These are things I would do but I don't think I would put a Tesla roof on unless it had a ROI that was worth it. Regarding rich/poor - I definitely don't feel rich. My spending has been on my younger son and dog rather than on myself. I have so many things that I could spend on for making this my home finally. But I can't pull the trigger. In a way I admire your pluck in wanting to go after what you want Good luck whatever you decide.
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tskeeter
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Post by tskeeter on Aug 12, 2022 16:34:07 GMT -5
Rukh, I think getting involved in a massive house renovation would be a mistake. You’ve expressed that you feel burned out and stressed to the point that you are limiting the growth of RI. I’m asking myself why you would want to take on the need to make literally thousands of decisions that need to be made immediately about things you know very little about?
Any kind of remodel is very complicated. We had an eight foot section of wall taken down last summer. That meant we needed to repair the hole in the carpet where the wall had stood. Since we went cheap when the house was built, over 15 years ago, we decided to upgrade the flooring so it is consistent with most other homes in the neighborhood. DW has been astounded by the number of contractors required for this simple project. First were the movers to empty the rooms that got new floors (we did the packing). Since we were doing the dining room, family room, a bedroom, kitchen, laundry room, and three bathrooms, we were essentially moving a whole house. Including the art on the walls and the books in the bookcase. Next were the appliance movers to move the washer and drier out of the laundry room. Then the carpenter took down the wall. This was followed by an electrician to reinstall the wiring and switches that had been in the wall that was removed. Then the drywall contractor came to install drywall on the framing that the wall removal exposed. Now we were ready for the plumber to remove the toilets from the bathrooms so the floors could be tiled. Next up was the wood flooring contractor. Followed by the tile contractor. Replacing the flooring required that the baseboard be replaced in every room getting new flooring. Apparently the helper assigned to remove the baseboards was in their first week on the job. They did a bunch of damage to the drywall, leaving holes that ranged from fist size to nearly two feet square. After a second trip by the drywall contractor to repair the drywall damage, the painter came in and painted the new baseboards and everywhere that the drywall had been damaged. Last, we brought in a construction cleaning contractor to clean up the concrete dust that coated the bookshelves, window sills, kitchen cabinets, walls, etc. (The flooring contractors had to grind the concrete slab to level out cracks in the slab so the flooring would lay flat on the slab.). The final thing DW and I did was to apply two coats of sealer to all the tile grout to help keep the grout clean.
Overall, the contractor roster to remove eight feet of wall was
Movers - two trips Appliance movers - two trips Carpentry contractor - two trips (remove wall, install baseboards) Electrician Drywall contractor - two trips Plumber - two trips Flooring contractor Tile contractor Painter Cleaning contractor
More extensive work would likely require an even longer list of contractors. Even more questions and even more design decisions (Picking flooring materials, colors, and styles was a six week process for us. Other finishes, such as wall paint and baseboard finish were a non-issue for us because we matched the existing finishes and we had records of who the paint manufacturer was and what colors were used.).
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plugginaway22
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Post by plugginaway22 on Aug 12, 2022 17:07:44 GMT -5
I forget how old you are. My perspective is from a 61 year old, newly retired, burnt out manager. My DH and I were making over 200k together when we retired but we definitely NEVER felt rich. When you are maxing 2 401ks, HSA, etc, etc...the cash in the checking account seems no big deal. I really admire what you have done as a single Mom, with a home in a big city, putting kids through school, the whole deal.
At this point in my life I want nothing but simplification. We have bank accounts everywhere, still haven't rolled over a 401K, lots of financial decisions to make. For the past 7 months of retirement I have been doing the clean-out of our 4 BR home where we've lived over 26 years and raised 3 kids. DH takes care of the almost 1/2 acre lot and he is getting tired of it. Our annual property taxes are high ($5300) for living in a home that zillow says is only worth $300k. Condos around here are unappealing so we need to figure out our next steps. With future energy costs increasing we don't need to be heating and cooling this large home.
Anyway, unless you are so in love with your home that you cannot imagine living anywhere else, I would sell and downsize and pick a place that allows the kittys! My sister has had a Tesla for 4 years and is in love with it. She is also currently getting solar panels on her home roof.
Congrats on being able to make choices!
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Aug 12, 2022 17:12:02 GMT -5
Thanks all for the sobering thoughts. A lot to digest and think about. It seems a bit crazy to do it, then again, a bit crazy not to, too! This is what I've been thinking and planning for for about 15 years, and I'm finally in position to pull the trigger. Or at least find the trigger. Maybe it just means a lot less doing it now than it would have 15 year ago? And if so, how should I assess? calling swamp if a lawyer should look over the inital agreement for doing a design plan? Sent out a message to the empolyee assistance program to see if their legal help would include something like this. It seems pretty standard, as if I would know!, on page 5 of 6. Just a few things struck me as what does that mean? or why would that be? example, liability for the design is limited to 150k, but it goes both ways. How could I as a client damage the designer? Just now sure what that would mean....if I trashed them online, or what? It can’t hurt
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2022 17:15:50 GMT -5
Rukh, I think getting involved in a massive house renovation would be a mistake. You’ve expressed that you feel burned out and stressed to the point that you are limiting the growth of RI. I’m asking myself why you would want to take on the need to make literally thousands of decisions that need to be made immediately about things you know very little about? Any kind of remodel is very complicated. We had an eight foot section of wall taken down last summer. That meant we needed to repair the hole in the carpet where the wall had stood. Since we went cheap when the house was built, over 15 years ago, we decided to upgrade the flooring so it is consistent with most other homes in the neighborhood. DW has been astounded by the number of contractors required for this simple project. First were the movers to empty the rooms that got new floors (we did the packing). Since we were doing the dining room, family room, a bedroom, kitchen, laundry room, and three bathrooms, we were essentially moving a whole house. Including the art on the walls and the books in the bookcase. Next were the appliance movers to move the washer and drier out of the laundry room. Then the carpenter took down the wall. This was followed by an electrician to reinstall the wiring and switches that had been in the wall that was removed. Then the drywall contractor came to install drywall on the framing that the wall removal exposed. Now we were ready for the plumber to remove the toilets from the bathrooms so the floors could be tiled. Next up was the wood flooring contractor. Followed by the tile contractor. Replacing the flooring required that the baseboard be replaced in every room getting new flooring. Apparently the helper assigned to remove the baseboards was in their first week on the job. They did a bunch of damage to the drywall, leaving holes that ranged from fist size to nearly two feet square. After a second trip by the drywall contractor to repair the drywall damage, the painter came in and painted the new baseboards and everywhere that the drywall had been damaged. Last, we brought in a construction cleaning contractor to clean up the concrete dust that coated the bookshelves, window sills, kitchen cabinets, walls, etc. (The flooring contractors had to grind the concrete slab to level out cracks in the slab so the flooring would lay flat on the slab.). The final thing DW and I did was to apply two coats of sealer to all the tile grout to help keep the grout clean. Overall, the contractor roster to remove eight feet of wall was Movers - two trips Appliance movers - two trips Carpentry contractor - two trips (remove wall, install baseboards) Electrician Drywall contractor - two trips Plumber - two trips Flooring contractor Tile contractor Painter Cleaning contractor More extensive work would likely require an even longer list of contractors. Even more questions and even more design decisions (Picking flooring materials, colors, and styles was a six week process for us. Other finishes, such as wall paint and baseboard finish were a non-issue for us because we matched the existing finishes and we had records of who the paint manufacturer was and what colors were used.). I got really tired just reading this post.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2022 17:32:11 GMT -5
What stood out to me is the age of the house. My other house was built in the early ‘60’s and I quickly learned that because of when it was built, even simple stuff got complicated. Even something as simple as changing a shower head. I’m not a complete dummy, and I know changing a shower head is simple. But not at that house! The shower arm that comes out of the wall had a “ball” on the end of it. Modern shower heads are not built to accommodate that. So, just to change the shower head, I had to call a plumber to replace the arm coming out of the wall. So I could get a new shower head. Your house is even older than that one. Unless the wiring and plumbing have been update fairly recently, increase your estimated costs for whatever will involve those. Then, whatever work you have done will have to meet current codes. I’m guessing codes have changed a lot over 100 years. So be prepared to learn that things you never even thought about around your house, don’t meet code and that will have to be addressed as it pops up. Add some more money to your estimates. Even just trying to do minor things at my house got to be complicated and cost more money than I expected. Who knew I’d have to hire a plumber just to change a shower head?! Also I watch enough HGTV to believe anytime you start opening walls and stuff like that, it’s almost guaranteed you’ll uncover some problems you had no idea your house had. Does this house have sentimental value for you?
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 12, 2022 17:43:27 GMT -5
Rukh, I think getting involved in a massive house renovation would be a mistake. You’ve expressed that you feel burned out and stressed to the point that you are limiting the growth of RI. I’m asking myself why you would want to take on the need to make literally thousands of decisions that need to be made immediately about things you know very little about? Any kind of remodel is very complicated. We had an eight foot section of wall taken down last summer. That meant we needed to repair the hole in the carpet where the wall had stood. Since we went cheap when the house was built, over 15 years ago, we decided to upgrade the flooring so it is consistent with most other homes in the neighborhood. DW has been astounded by the number of contractors required for this simple project. First were the movers to empty the rooms that got new floors (we did the packing). Since we were doing the dining room, family room, a bedroom, kitchen, laundry room, and three bathrooms, we were essentially moving a whole house. Including the art on the walls and the books in the bookcase. Next were the appliance movers to move the washer and drier out of the laundry room. Then the carpenter took down the wall. This was followed by an electrician to reinstall the wiring and switches that had been in the wall that was removed. Then the drywall contractor came to install drywall on the framing that the wall removal exposed. Now we were ready for the plumber to remove the toilets from the bathrooms so the floors could be tiled. Next up was the wood flooring contractor. Followed by the tile contractor. Replacing the flooring required that the baseboard be replaced in every room getting new flooring. Apparently the helper assigned to remove the baseboards was in their first week on the job. They did a bunch of damage to the drywall, leaving holes that ranged from fist size to nearly two feet square. After a second trip by the drywall contractor to repair the drywall damage, the painter came in and painted the new baseboards and everywhere that the drywall had been damaged. Last, we brought in a construction cleaning contractor to clean up the concrete dust that coated the bookshelves, window sills, kitchen cabinets, walls, etc. (The flooring contractors had to grind the concrete slab to level out cracks in the slab so the flooring would lay flat on the slab.). The final thing DW and I did was to apply two coats of sealer to all the tile grout to help keep the grout clean. Overall, the contractor roster to remove eight feet of wall was Movers - two trips Appliance movers - two trips Carpentry contractor - two trips (remove wall, install baseboards) Electrician Drywall contractor - two trips Plumber - two trips Flooring contractor Tile contractor Painter Cleaning contractor More extensive work would likely require an even longer list of contractors. Even more questions and even more design decisions (Picking flooring materials, colors, and styles was a six week process for us. Other finishes, such as wall paint and baseboard finish were a non-issue for us because we matched the existing finishes and we had records of who the paint manufacturer was and what colors were used.). I got really tired just reading this post. seriously - but more or less work than moving?? Tis a query!
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Aug 12, 2022 17:45:41 GMT -5
My first house was built in 1876. My Ex and I gutted it and redid it, and OMG, every project turned up at least 3 other things that needed to be fixed/changed before we could move on. We started in 93 and finished in 99 and I was always dealing with plaster dust and at least one room in complete chaos. I'm sure a professional crew can whip through things way faster than we did, but I'll bet there will still be a lot of hidden surprises that add to the bottom line, so I would definitely expect it to be on the higher end of the estimates.
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Aug 12, 2022 17:47:27 GMT -5
I got really tired just reading this post. seriously - but more or less work than moving?? Tis a query! True that. The thought of moving after being here for 23 years is a little daunting.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2022 17:48:04 GMT -5
I got really tired just reading this post. seriously - but more or less work than moving?? Tis a query! I don’t like moving, but from the description, moving sounds easier to me lol.
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jerseygirl
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Post by jerseygirl on Aug 12, 2022 17:50:02 GMT -5
Moving doesn’t take 3-6 yrs either
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2022 17:55:23 GMT -5
seriously - but more or less work than moving?? Tis a query! True that. The thought of moving after being here for 23 years is a little daunting. I moved out of my house after almost 20 years. That was a few years after a MAJOR decluttering that I mostly maintained until I moved. Some rooms, I hadn’t even replaced the furniture in. Meaning there was less furniture to move than what’s in most 3br houses. And the house is fairly small, under 1300sf. I STILL HAD A BUNCH OF SHIT TO MOVE! Mister was awesome with playing Tetris when we loaded the moving truck, but everything still didn’t fit. “Daunting” is an understatement.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Aug 12, 2022 19:09:32 GMT -5
Personally, I would just sell the house or just stick to the "have-to's. That's a huge risk sticking a half million into a place when you want to retire and when the housing market is in a weird spot. Where is all the money above the 100K you have saved going to come from? Does that mean you're stuck not being able to retire until it's paid off? Agree with MPL. Start with what the house really needs done. See how that works out and go from there. For me personally, I'm very glad hubby retired early and we downsized into a smaller house. So much less to be concerned about.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Aug 12, 2022 19:37:03 GMT -5
We recently finished remodels for the 3 bathrooms in our house. 25 year old house from the mid 90s. The original estimate for all that was $65k. 2 baths are big, 1 mid size and we chose everything mid tier, nothing glitzy or expensive. The final price $94k!!!!! Just for 3 bathrooms. Lumber is expensive. Supply chain issues these days means all accessories have gone up in price. Plumbers and electricians have jacked up their price because they are so in demand. You may choose a mid-price tile, but you may end up forced to go with a higher priced one because that’s the only one available for the next 6 months, and you don’t want to be stuck with a half finished project that long. And on and on it went….. Don’t even ask me about the headache of living in a construction zone for 5 months. We don’t even have pets, and the end of it all we were ready to throw even more money at it to just end it all quickly. What you describe Rukh…. Will easily be a 2 year project. And go with the idea that the final costs will be at least 25% higher than what you anticipated. I agree with folks who say that a 100 year old house would not be worth the headache.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 12, 2022 19:39:11 GMT -5
What stood out to me is the age of the house. My other house was built in the early ‘60’s and I quickly learned that because of when it was built, even simple stuff got complicated. Even something as simple as changing a shower head. I’m not a complete dummy, and I know changing a shower head is simple. But not at that house! The shower arm that comes out of the wall had a “ball” on the end of it. Modern shower heads are not built to accommodate that. So, just to change the shower head, I had to call a plumber to replace the arm coming out of the wall. So I could get a new shower head. Your house is even older than that one. Unless the wiring and plumbing have been update fairly recently, increase your estimated costs for whatever will involve those. Then, whatever work you have done will have to meet current codes. I’m guessing codes have changed a lot over 100 years. So be prepared to learn that things you never even thought about around your house, don’t meet code and that will have to be addressed as it pops up. Add some more money to your estimates. Even just trying to do minor things at my house got to be complicated and cost more money than I expected. Who knew I’d have to hire a plumber just to change a shower head?! Also I watch enough HGTV to believe anytime you start opening walls and stuff like that, it’s almost guaranteed you’ll uncover some problems you had no idea your house had. Does this house have sentimental value for you? it does, to an extent. but - that's because it's very close to what I always wanted in a house. To get more of what I want would be difficult.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Aug 12, 2022 20:08:07 GMT -5
You may choose a mid-price tile, but you may end up forced to go with a higher priced one because that’s the only one available for the next 6 months, and you don’t want to be stuck with a half finished project that long. And on and on it went….. Don’t even ask me about the headache of living in a construction zone for 5 months. We don’t even have pets, and the end of it all we were ready to throw even more money at it to just end it all quickly. This is the reason I have a signed contract on my bathtub surround to tile shower that says they can't start until everything is here. Contract signed in February. Still waiting on one part. Supposedly coming in September. I will believe it when I see it. I am not doing the entire bathroom. The shower and a new countertop. House is 13 years old. I've never lived in a place for 13 years. I can't imagine moving.
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aricia
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Post by aricia on Aug 12, 2022 21:23:18 GMT -5
This is so subjective, so worth what you paid for it. 😊 I would peg you at upper middle class. Not rich. Now seems like a terrible time to try and get construction work done. Depending on your house condition, you might not have much choice if you don’t want to move. If you start with the basics and then add on the rest as you save up over the years like you were thinking, AND you keep working your day job to afford it, you’ll be okay. But you’ll be temporarily house poor. If I loved the location and had kept an eye on the real estate market for a year or so and didn’t see anything appealing AND I planned on living there for 20 years, I might maybe consider it. 😉 If you sell soon after I highly doubt you will come out ahead vs not making improvements and selling now. You may never really come out ahead. You better love it to make it worth it.
We could “afford” a pretty expensive house because we could have a large down payment. The personal rule of thumb I use when looking at the market is three times income for purchase price, without regard for what the mortgage would be. I would use $165 x 3 ~$500,000 plus maybe $100,000 which is more of deferred maintenance so $600,000 into the house. It looks like you paid maybe $400,000? So putting in another $200,000 is what would be reasonable in my (very subjective) book. If I were you and I was shopping for a new house I would look at a purchase price of about $500,000 for one in fairly decent shape, knowing that I will need to repair and replace and other normal home expenses over the years. This is conservative and I live in a LCOL area so there’s no need to “stretch” for a house. Unless it’s a lake house that I’m constantly longing for. 😊
Good luck with your decision!
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Aug 12, 2022 22:47:18 GMT -5
If you are burned out, why aren't you looking at cutting back? I mean, I understand it's hard to change habits, right? When one is in putting fires mode all the time, you don't really know how to operate in any other way. Particularly when you've likely done it over a lifetime.
I re-read your post. Having a self-sufficient house is a want. I mean. It is really not a need.
If you are willing to prioritize a self-sufficient home over your mental health, then something else is at play. You seem like a pretty introspective person, so I'd take some time to figure it out.
I am burned out. I think we've settled on the following: 1. My husband is going to apply for appropriate full time jobs so I can go part time. (He just applied for one last weekend)
2. I will retire at 55/56, collect most of my pension, get paid health insurance for 4 years, and cut back working to 30 hours or so a week, between teaching and another part time job. I can't just teach. That's a little too risky, given my youngest will be just starting high school when I hang it up.
3. I will try to increase my dayjob income through promotions/new opportunities so that I don't have to work two jobs.
Yes. My house is 1991 fugly. These days, I'm home so little it and/or awake at home so little it hardly matters. If I'm in my bathroom 2-3 hours, total, every week..does that really justify keeping myself in a burnt out state so that I can have the bathroom of my dreams , etc? No. Have your kids started talking about starting families in the near future? I mean, it's super nice that you want to help them. But, again, sacrificing your mental health to continue to give your kids a leg up...that's a choice. And I think one that you need to figure out why you want to do that.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Aug 12, 2022 23:24:01 GMT -5
I agree that if you're feeling burnt out, that's NOT the time to do a remodel. At least around here, good luck finding a contractor, then you pray they actually show up on the day they promise to be there. Ugh!
DD bought a house that was built in the 1950's, and just trying to do little things with that house is turning into a major pain due to the changes in the building code. She originally wanted to add a dishwasher to the kitchen. But, now venting is required, which means a hole would have to go behind the cabinets & into the wall. She decided to live without the dishwasher until she can afford to remodel the entire kitchen. Too much trouble just to add a dishwasher to a kitchen that still has the original cabinets.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 12:48:31 GMT -5
This is so subjective, so worth what you paid for it. 😊 I would peg you at upper middle class. Not rich. Now seems like a terrible time to try and get construction work done. Depending on your house condition, you might not have much choice if you don’t want to move. If you start with the basics and then add on the rest as you save up over the years like you were thinking, AND you keep working your day job to afford it, you’ll be okay. But you’ll be temporarily house poor. If I loved the location and had kept an eye on the real estate market for a year or so and didn’t see anything appealing AND I planned on living there for 20 years, I might maybe consider it. 😉 If you sell soon after I highly doubt you will come out ahead vs not making improvements and selling now. You may never really come out ahead. You better love it to make it worth it. We could “afford” a pretty expensive house because we could have a large down payment. The personal rule of thumb I use when looking at the market is three times income for purchase price, without regard for what the mortgage would be. I would use $165 x 3 ~$500,000 plus maybe $100,000 which is more of deferred maintenance so $600,000 into the house. It looks like you paid maybe $400,000? So putting in another $200,000 is what would be reasonable in my (very subjective) book. If I were you and I was shopping for a new house I would look at a purchase price of about $500,000 for one in fairly decent shape, knowing that I will need to repair and replace and other normal home expenses over the years. This is conservative and I live in a LCOL area so there’s no need to “stretch” for a house. Unless it’s a lake house that I’m constantly longing for. 😊 Good luck with your decision! Thanks! I like your metric and will take this into consideration. Some other things I was cogitating on last night was the energey self-sufficiency angle. Heating in the bitter winter is often over 500 a month - lord only knows what it will be coming up. So with electric and heating, going to average that with a bit of inflation and call it 500 month average. That is 6k a year and requires 150k to support (based on the 4% withdrawl strategy). So if I credit myself for that upgrade, take the 600+150 for 750, minus purchase price of 435 that gives me about 300k, which I think is workable for this situation. If I have 100, and looking at 200 more I'm thinking in my head that each 100k spent on this project = no more than 1 more year working. For example, if we get a year with 40% gains in the stock market, that will obviously change the calculus of when I retire. Conversely, if we have a year 40% losses, not doing this project isn't going to sheild me from that, but working an extra year to pay the 100k is necessary. So while I wouldn't have access to 100k in case per year, giving some "credit" for all the other financial positives of an additional year of work such as upping eventual soc sec income, company match to 401k and hsa, etc. Plus all the other company benefits of subsidized health insurance (including dental and visions, LTD, STD, life, etc.), plus having 1 less year of retirement to fund, plus not drawing down assets during the downturn, etc. Wow - thank you for this! Now that I put this down and combine with other thoughts - it gives me something very important that was missing in my thinking. An upper/max budget for the project, based very logically with common metrics for salary/house purchasing. Of course, if I cheat and include RI income, could be a lot more . I'll call that.....wiggle room. RI income has been very steady for 3 years, slight increases. Given inflation, I should raise my rates....have been the same the last 4 years. Also with my 100k/year of working metric, I can quantify decisions with time. A 25k vs 50k option - 3 extra months of working for the 50k option. How worth it is that? And then again at the whole project how many years? How worth it? This is so helpful, really appreciate this!
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susana1954
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Post by susana1954 on Aug 13, 2022 15:18:45 GMT -5
I'm not in your league, but I wouldn't call you rich . . . particularly to live in Illinois, which is renowned for its high taxes (which you mention). Despite that, I'll tell you what struck me reading your original post. You spend a lot of money. You sabotage your attempts to "pay yourself first" by having to dip into that money to make ends meet. Remember that you will need to save enough to generate about 80% of your aftertax income for retirement. Don't really kid yourself that you will live more cheaply then. Inflation is kicking my pension's ass. You don't like your job and suspect that it may start to show although it hasn't yet. Or you may lose it for some other reason. High-paying jobs take longer to replace than low-paying ones. I know from having been on here a long time that both you and your daughter (do you have more than one?) have high student loan balances. Or did you pay those off? For some reason, I thought some of them were Parent Plus loans, which means that you are responsible. And now you are talking about turning a $600k house into a million dollar house. But you haven't said that houses sell for a million dollars in your neighborhood. You mentioned one that was valued at more than your $600k, but you didn't say the source of the valuation. Zillow values are notoriously bad. Did it sell at the value you posted? Would yours sell for a million dollars? I sound like a Negative Nelly, and I'm not. You just sound as if you are in over your head in terms of plans and "dreams." You even mention the possibility of giving your house away if one of your children wants it one day. Come back down to earth, Rukh, and do the things that will make your house both livable and sellable. That's the new siding, the new roof, etc. That should take you at least a year at the rate it takes to find contractors and getting them to get the job done these days! Then revaluate. As always, just my 2 cents . . . I was always impressed at your perseverance in getting your PhD and starting Rukh, Inc.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 15:26:16 GMT -5
I forget how old you are. My perspective is from a 61 year old, newly retired, burnt out manager. My DH and I were making over 200k together when we retired but we definitely NEVER felt rich. When you are maxing 2 401ks, HSA, etc, etc...the cash in the checking account seems no big deal. I really admire what you have done as a single Mom, with a home in a big city, putting kids through school, the whole deal. At this point in my life I want nothing but simplification. We have bank accounts everywhere, still haven't rolled over a 401K, lots of financial decisions to make. For the past 7 months of retirement I have been doing the clean-out of our 4 BR home where we've lived over 26 years and raised 3 kids. DH takes care of the almost 1/2 acre lot and he is getting tired of it. Our annual property taxes are high ($5300) for living in a home that zillow says is only worth $300k. Condos around here are unappealing so we need to figure out our next steps. With future energy costs increasing we don't need to be heating and cooling this large home. Anyway, unless you are so in love with your home that you cannot imagine living anywhere else, I would sell and downsize and pick a place that allows the kittys! My sister has had a Tesla for 4 years and is in love with it. She is also currently getting solar panels on her home roof. Congrats on being able to make choices! Thanks pluggingaway! I am 57 - but not for very much longer! I do think of this as a simplication. Everything done, everything new, everything good to start out in retirement. The thought of that fills me with joy! Currently, everything is stressful - so much needs doing. Everywhere I rest my eyes needs work! Plus all my crazy ideas. I want a greenhouse connected to the house. I want a built-in hot tub. I want a sauna in the basement. I want a pool table in the basement (thinking this could only be done while walls are down or stairways ripped out!). I want to separate the toilet from the bath euro style. I want a bigger kitchen -but how, move the stairs or enlarge the footprint of house or take some space from another room maybe even losing the powder room? So I think this process will help me explore all of these and then I pick the one or two luxuries that seem to offer the best ROI within the plan, and I can be done with my crazy thought streams! I think either moving, doing this major overhaul, or prioritizing and doing the projects peicemeal with individual contractors is going to be a lot of work and a lot of stress. I.e. there are certain aspects that cannot be avoided no matter what direction I go. Moving would be it's own hell, as many have mentioned. And a lot of the same hell as doing the whole house overhaul. So, one thing that is striking me right now is that each process would either increase or decrease the timing involved for that common work. Moving would be much more compact Major overall spread across a few years, and then the piecemeal likely across 5 or more years. There is a lot of work and pain points to be encoutered no matter what direction I go. Thinking about how that would play out, what I gain and lose under each scenario, is helpful.
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Aug 13, 2022 15:45:47 GMT -5
I'm just thinking or all the posts about how you want to quit working and retire yesterday and this seems so counter to that goal. Not if the money was there to write a check to get it all done at once, but having it spread out over years when you're cashflowing and would need to work. But, I guess if you're doing it in stages where you could quit at any given point it wouldn't be so bad.
Another consideration though. NINE cats living in a to the studs rehab of a house? That kind of stresses me out just thinking about it. Will you be able to confine them to a single area not being worked on?
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Aug 13, 2022 15:55:28 GMT -5
Pool tables don't come in one piece. We just bought a new one last year - it comes in pieces and they build it in your location.
I would get your house sellable and that's it. I think your plans sound awesome but grandiose. You talk about being burned out and not wanting to work, but then plan on spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on a renovation that requires you to work longer.
You talk about how little you drive but then want to shell out tens of thousands (60k? 70k?) on a Tesla.
I think you need to reevaluate what you really want and, more importantly, need.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 16:44:57 GMT -5
I'm just thinking or all the posts about how you want to quit working and retire yesterday and this seems so counter to that goal. Not if the money was there to write a check to get it all done at once, but having it spread out over years when you're cashflowing and would need to work. But, I guess if you're doing it in stages where you could quit at any given point it wouldn't be so bad. Another consideration though. NINE cats living in a to the studs rehab of a house? That kind of stresses me out just thinking about it. Will you be able to confine them to a single area not being worked on? This is part of that process, actually. One reason I didn’t quit when I hit 2 m+, because so much undone in this respect. Reason I’ve been hanging on now, I think I’ve mentioned actually that I’ve determined I could quit now and continue as I am, but look around and say I don’t want to live this way indefinitely! The management of cats will require planning, but will cross that bridge when I get a better understanding of what is happening when and what options may be available at the time.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Aug 13, 2022 16:45:39 GMT -5
I used to think that I had to wait to retire until our house was 100% brand new update, etc. In terms of simplification.
Now, I'm like, nope. We'll pick through when I'm cutting back or we are retired.
That's how badly I want to be done. I actually thought I might want to buy a second home to "fix up."
Turns out, I'm fine enough doing it once, on our home we have right now. I have 0 desire to do it again for funsies.
I know you are under a lot of stress. What are you doing to mitigate that?
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 16:46:34 GMT -5
Miscellaneous notes on cats, DD to take 2-3 more when she gets a bigger place next spring.
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 16:51:38 GMT -5
Personally, I would just sell the house or just stick to the "have-to's. That's a huge risk sticking a half million into a place when you want to retire and when the housing market is in a weird spot. Where is all the money above the 100K you have saved going to come from? Does that mean you're stuck not being able to retire until it's paid off? Agree with MPL. Start with what the house really needs done. See how that works out and go from there. But that’s exactly what I am doing. I’m getting architectural plans for the works and then doing what really needs done first or as a foundation to room by room projects.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Aug 13, 2022 17:00:09 GMT -5
Then you should be fine. Just don't forget you are "burnt out at work."
What about student loans?
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Aug 13, 2022 18:06:05 GMT -5
If you are burned out, why aren't you looking at cutting back? I mean, I understand it's hard to change habits, right? When one is in putting fires mode all the time, you don't really know how to operate in any other way. Particularly when you've likely done it over a lifetime.
I re-read your post. Having a self-sufficient house is a want. I mean. It is really not a need.
If you are willing to prioritize a self-sufficient home over your mental health, then something else is at play. You seem like a pretty introspective person, so I'd take some time to figure it out.
I am burned out. I think we've settled on the following: 1. My husband is going to apply for appropriate full time jobs so I can go part time. (He just applied for one last weekend)
2. I will retire at 55/56, collect most of my pension, get paid health insurance for 4 years, and cut back working to 30 hours or so a week, between teaching and another part time job. I can't just teach. That's a little too risky, given my youngest will be just starting high school when I hang it up.
3. I will try to increase my dayjob income through promotions/new opportunities so that I don't have to work two jobs.
Yes. My house is 1991 fugly. These days, I'm home so little it and/or awake at home so little it hardly matters. If I'm in my bathroom 2-3 hours, total, every week..does that really justify keeping myself in a burnt out state so that I can have the bathroom of my dreams , etc? No. Have your kids started talking about starting families in the near future? I mean, it's super nice that you want to help them. But, again, sacrificing your mental health to continue to give your kids a leg up...that's a choice. And I think one that you need to figure out why you want to do that. Energy self sufficiency may be a want on an individual basis, collectively I file it as a need and those in a position to go first have some obligation to do so. I have certain ideas about legacy, and giving one, that I intend to honor…to myself. It’s a gift to me as well as the offspring. Have no intention of querying their reproductive plans. I did pressure both to sign up for their 401ks. Bowing out of being a busybody going forward. Responded to a tweet of DDs. Was told not to follow her…..she needs freedom to be whatever without mom out there…lol. I’m doing what I feel I want for myself. If it involves a legacy, that’s on me.
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