wvugurl26
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 15:25:30 GMT -5
Posts: 21,730
|
Post by wvugurl26 on Feb 10, 2023 11:29:05 GMT -5
Hospice nurse says she's very close. We took her oxygen off. It's not going to help at this point and when she was last able to really move her arms around, she was trying to take it off.
Her weekday nurse is an angel. She has patiently walked me through all the things she thinks should be considered and gave me time to process. Like this morning with oxygen. No, I hadn't thought about it but I agreed she hated it and if it's doing no good let's get that off her.
|
|
taz157
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 20:50:06 GMT -5
Posts: 12,835
|
Post by taz157 on Feb 10, 2023 11:45:48 GMT -5
Hospice nurse says she's very close. We took her oxygen off. It's not going to help at this point and when she was last able to really move her arms around, she was trying to take it off. Her weekday nurse is an angel. She has patiently walked me through all the things she thinks should be considered and gave me time to process. Like this morning with oxygen. No, I hadn't thought about it but I agreed she hated it and if it's doing no good let's get that off her. ((((Hugs))))
|
|
giramomma
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 11:25:27 GMT -5
Posts: 21,399
|
Post by giramomma on Feb 10, 2023 12:06:12 GMT -5
|
|
notagain
Established Member
Enter your message here...
Joined: Jun 10, 2020 6:15:06 GMT -5
Posts: 330
|
Post by notagain on Feb 10, 2023 12:38:41 GMT -5
Hugs to you
|
|
raeoflyte
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 15:43:53 GMT -5
Posts: 14,759
|
Post by raeoflyte on Feb 10, 2023 12:40:40 GMT -5
Hugs
|
|
flamingo
Well-Known Member
Joined: Dec 17, 2012 10:38:09 GMT -5
Posts: 1,915
Mini-Profile Name Color: 7c65d4
|
Post by flamingo on Feb 10, 2023 13:34:38 GMT -5
Big hugs to you wvugurl26. You're family is in my thoughts.
|
|
jerseygirl
Senior Member
Joined: May 13, 2018 7:43:08 GMT -5
Posts: 4,817
|
Post by jerseygirl on Feb 10, 2023 15:07:56 GMT -5
Wvugirl, have you made arrangements for a priest/minister/rabbi when she passes? I was so disappointed in our church. I called about priest coming for last rites but only got an answering machine. No one called back for 2 days - big oops Hospice was able to get a non denomination minister when nurse saw how upset I was On the other hand priest at funeral was wonderful and spoke about gifts the Deaf bring and engage her deaf friends. We had an ASL interpreter for the mass and lunch after. She donated her services
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,275
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on Feb 10, 2023 18:26:29 GMT -5
Thinking about you and your family. Mom always had to have a fun blowing at her. The hospice nurse suggested we turn it off now as she was no longer feeling it. We also removed the oxygen.
|
|
wvugurl26
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 15:25:30 GMT -5
Posts: 21,730
|
Post by wvugurl26 on Feb 10, 2023 21:22:19 GMT -5
Grandma's youngest sister finally came to visit today. Her family had been trying to get her to come see my grandma. That must have been who she was waiting on. Her sister spoke to her and held her hand and in 5 minutes Grandma was gone.
Hospice came and we cleaned her up and they called the funeral home. Hospice took care of disposing of the drugs.
We go Saturday to finalize and pay for the arrangements my dad and uncle set up Monday.
My final gift is done and I'm exhausted more mentally than physically. She told my dad one night while she was still having periods of consciousness that she owed me thousands.
This one hurts more. She was the rock of the family and the leader.
Thanks to everyone for thinking of us.
|
|
giramomma
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 11:25:27 GMT -5
Posts: 21,399
|
Post by giramomma on Feb 10, 2023 21:28:25 GMT -5
I'm so sorry.
|
|
steph08
Junior Associate
Joined: Jan 3, 2011 13:06:01 GMT -5
Posts: 5,459
|
Post by steph08 on Feb 10, 2023 21:32:14 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for your loss.
|
|
ners
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 23, 2010 16:21:18 GMT -5
Posts: 6,496
|
Post by ners on Feb 10, 2023 21:32:43 GMT -5
|
|
Opti
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 10:45:38 GMT -5
Posts: 39,775
Location: New Jersey
Mini-Profile Name Color: c28523
Mini-Profile Text Color: 990033
Member is Online
|
Post by Opti on Feb 10, 2023 21:38:12 GMT -5
Sorry for the loss of your rock Wvu.
|
|
stillmovingforward
Senior Member
Hanging on by a thread
Joined: Jan 1, 2014 21:52:58 GMT -5
Posts: 3,066
Today's Mood: Don't Mess with Me!
Location: Not Sure Yet
|
Post by stillmovingforward on Feb 10, 2023 22:25:11 GMT -5
I'm sorry for your loss. But happy for your grandmother that you could be with her while she passed. I hope doing this loving act will will comfort you in the future.
When the acute pain of my father's death had eased, I was comforted by knowing I aided him one last and important time.
|
|
taz157
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 20:50:06 GMT -5
Posts: 12,835
|
Post by taz157 on Feb 10, 2023 22:32:42 GMT -5
I’m sorry wvugurl26. I can imagine how hard this was. I’m glad her sister was able to come and visit before grandma passed. ((((Hugs))))
|
|
jerseygirl
Senior Member
Joined: May 13, 2018 7:43:08 GMT -5
Posts: 4,817
|
Post by jerseygirl on Feb 10, 2023 22:32:42 GMT -5
Your grandma was blessed to have her family help her through this. So nice to know she wanted to be with her sister. I miss my sister so much. Tears but try to remember the joyful and good times of her life
|
|
saveinla
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 2:00:29 GMT -5
Posts: 5,233
|
Post by saveinla on Feb 10, 2023 22:39:13 GMT -5
Sorry for your loss wvugurl26. My grandma was waiting for her sister in law for a week too. As soon as she came, she was done. They were childhood friends more than inlaws.
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,275
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on Feb 10, 2023 23:17:43 GMT -5
My condolences
|
|
NastyWoman
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 20:50:37 GMT -5
Posts: 14,418
|
Post by NastyWoman on Feb 10, 2023 23:26:47 GMT -5
|
|
busymom
Distinguished Associate
Why is the rum always gone? Oh...that's why.
Joined: Dec 25, 2010 21:09:36 GMT -5
Posts: 28,456
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"https://cdn.nickpic.host/images/IPauJ5.jpg","color":""}
Mini-Profile Name Color: 0D317F
Mini-Profile Text Color: 0D317F
Member is Online
|
Post by busymom on Feb 10, 2023 23:56:23 GMT -5
You truly are a blessing to your family, wvugurl26. I'm sorry for your loss, but your dear grandma must've been totally at peace with you at the helm.
|
|
debthaven
Senior Associate
Joined: Apr 7, 2015 15:26:39 GMT -5
Posts: 10,378
|
Post by debthaven on Feb 11, 2023 2:45:51 GMT -5
I’m so sorry for your immense loss wvugurl26. She was your rock but clearly you were hers too.
|
|
finnime
Junior Associate
Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.
Joined: Dec 23, 2010 7:14:35 GMT -5
Posts: 7,492
|
Post by finnime on Feb 11, 2023 7:30:21 GMT -5
I'm so sorry, wvugurl26. You gave your grandmother a great gift, so she could go in peace. Thnking of you. Take good care.
|
|
ken a.k.a OMK
Senior Associate
They killed Kenny, the bastards.
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 14:39:20 GMT -5
Posts: 14,117
Location: Maryland
Member is Online
|
Post by ken a.k.a OMK on Feb 11, 2023 8:45:48 GMT -5
Sorry wvugurl26 You did a wonderful job taking care of her. Now it's time to take care of yourself.
|
|
skeeter
Well-Known Member
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 22:06:35 GMT -5
Posts: 1,292
|
Post by skeeter on Feb 11, 2023 8:58:39 GMT -5
FWIW wvugurl26, I just wanted to let you know how much I admire you. Your strength and love for your Grandmother came through in every post you made.
Not many people in this world would have done half as much as you have. They would have walked away and let others handle the situation and made numerous excuses for why they were not there for the person that needed them the most. Despite your own pain knowing you were going to lose her, your courage and kindness was truly a gift money can't buy.
When you get back home, I sincerely hope you find peace in knowing that you made your Grandmother's passing as easy and comfortable as it could be. I think that is something we all hope for, but unfortunately we all don't get.
Please try and take care of yourself at least a little bit now.
|
|
NomoreDramaQ1015
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:26:32 GMT -5
Posts: 47,331
Member is Online
|
Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Feb 11, 2023 10:55:00 GMT -5
Sorry for your loss WVU.
When we got home from the hospital I ended up taking a 4 hour nap. Please remember to take a moment to care for yourself right now.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: May 17, 2024 18:50:16 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 11, 2023 16:57:15 GMT -5
wvugurl26 I am sorry for your loss but I am struck by your steadfast devotion and commitment to making her last moments the best they could be. And for listening to her wishes.
|
|
mollyanna58
Junior Associate
Joined: Jan 5, 2011 13:20:45 GMT -5
Posts: 6,675
|
Post by mollyanna58 on Feb 11, 2023 20:24:32 GMT -5
|
|
wvugurl26
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 15:25:30 GMT -5
Posts: 21,730
|
Post by wvugurl26 on Feb 11, 2023 21:38:26 GMT -5
Funeral arrangements are final. I wrote her obituary this morning before we went to funeral home. Forgot my aunt on the first draft and had to edit at the funeral home because we forgot her sister.
Apparently death certificates are addressed to or I think she said informed to? So my name's on that since I will be executor. Another thing I was not expecting. I signed all the funeral paperwork.
My uncle paid since he owed her anyway. But he signed a check and I had to write it out. He didn't go to the funeral home as his nerves are too bad. He's got a neurological disease that is negatively impacted by stress.
My DH arrived today and we moved to a hotel. We went to the mall and I found an outfit and shoes I'm happy with. I didn't want anything in my closet. I started crashing at the mall after I found the outfit. I found shoes and then we had a nice dinner.
The only things to finish tomorrow are a few shopping ends for me, get money to put the in card for the minister and go arrange for the food for after the graveside service.
This is the first night I can crash out and not have to wake up at 7/730. I was up until midnight/1am most nights. We didn't have night aides at first and then I'd sit talking to my dad.
|
|
raeoflyte
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 3, 2011 15:43:53 GMT -5
Posts: 14,759
|
Post by raeoflyte on Feb 11, 2023 23:29:46 GMT -5
Hugs wvugurl26. I hope you get a good night's rest.
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,275
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on Feb 12, 2023 9:15:34 GMT -5
Hope you slept well.
You will be shown as the informant on the death certificate. Whoever provides the information is the informant. Since people are usually upset when giving the information, we genealogists find lots of mistakes on death certificates.
|
|