Depression, Unemployment and Reaching a Settlement - Next

[azucena]

I told my manager way more than I should have in dec about my depression but I wanted to make it clear that work stress wasn't the precipitating factor. And I know we have a personal relationship besides just work in that she really cares. She ended up sharing her concern about her 22 yo daughter whom she worries is depressed but wasn't sure. I shared my psychiatrists contact info and she made an appt for her daughter the next week and said it's helping.

I'll echo what finnime said that depression can be about literally surviving including forcing yourself to eat so work is way down on the list of things to keep informed. Chloe thanks for sharing your conversation.

[TheOtherMe]

I ended up taking early retirement.  Between the depression and my manager on my case, I could not function anywhere in my life.

At our exit interview I told him I hoped nobody he cared deeply about ever suffered from depression.  He assured me they would not.  

At that time, he had no comprehension of depression.

[finnime]

I'm sorry to hear that, TheOtherMe. My last manager was clueless and hostile - partly because he just did not like me, no matter how good the work I did was. 

I know with proper treatment and accomodations as needed I have much to offer - I have a range and depth of critical skills that I'm eager to use. And people who don't understand or even attempt to are throttling so much good.

[TheOtherMe]

Ended up getting the early retirement converted to disability retirement.  That has made things much easier.

My manager was hostile to me, too.

[Shooby]

Feb 3, 2018 18:09:44 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I ended up taking early retirement.  Between the depression and my manager on my case, I could not function anywhere in my life.

At our exit interview I told him I hoped nobody he cared deeply about ever suffered from depression.  He assured me they would not.  

At that time, he had no comprehension of depression.

It's unfortunate that we have to share all that level of medical information.  I mean it really isn't anyone's business.  What is their business is whether you can do the work or not and if not, then they need to know that but I am not sure why they need to level of detail that they do.

[finnime]

I'm anxious about tomorrow. I tell myself it will be fine; they want to settle, too, and it's a mediation session, not a hearing. But I am nervous just the same. Court stuff always does this.

I've got documents from my doctor and from the investigation with the EEOC. I've got documentation of my job search.

I've got documentation of my actual work and performance before I was fired. The attorneys representing my employer spoke with various people about 6 months ago at the company, and discovered there was a lot of disagreement about my having been fired. I am grateful to whoever it is they talked with; people could have been neutral but were not. 

I'll bring my laptop, in case there is something I don't have a copy of. My attorney does not feel a lot of documentation is needed; both sides waived discovery when we agreed on mediation. But he also commented it can't hurt.

My life changed hugely three years ago. Now it may change again. Hoping. Anxious.

[Waffle]

finnime 

[TheOtherMe]

Many 


Will be thinking of you tomorrow.

[debthaven]

Thinking of you too finnime

[Jaguar]

All the best finnime, <<< BIG HUGS >>>

[bean29]

Praying for a good outcome.

[CCL]

Good luck.

[finnime]

Thank you all for your support.

My lawyer explained that this session is rather informal. As a federal issue (ADA; FMLA) it is in federal court and we'll meet in the judge's chambers. We'll start with each side outlining their positions then split into two rooms. I'll talk directly with the judge, who wants to get a settlement out of this. And since my former employer does, too, it's just a question of how much. I'm not paying my attorney on contingency, so whatever I get, I get, after taxes of course.

Of all the things to worry about, now I'm trying to figure out what to wear. It's turned cold here again. Session is in the afternoon. Breathe.

[Pants]

Feb 6, 2018 5:22:05 GMT -5 finnime said:

Thank you all for your support.

My lawyer explained that this session is rather informal. As a federal issue (ADA; FMLA) it is in federal court and we'll meet in the judge's chambers. We'll start with each side outlining their positions then split into two rooms. I'll talk directly with the judge, who wants to get a settlement out of this. And since my former employer does, too, it's just a question of how much. I'm not paying my attorney on contingency, so whatever I get, I get, after taxes of course.

Of all the things to worry about, now I'm trying to figure out what to wear. It's turned cold here again. Session is in the afternoon. Breathe.

Breathe.

Then go for the jugular.

<3

[flamingo]

You've got this! Take a deep breathe; you can do this.

Good luck!

[TheOtherMe]

Breathe and go for the maximum $ 

[snapdragon]

Really wishing for a good outcome for you. 

Sending you good juju.

[dee27]

Good luck today.

[Waffle]

Hope it goes well!

[finnime]

And we're done!

Mediation over litigation any day, in federal court. Things get done quickly and relatively cheaply.

I get a year's salary, in essence. About two-thirds of that is non-taxable as damages (depression) and some attorney's fees. I'm satisfied. Signed a confidentiality statement and agreed to not apply for any positions at former employer. They will give a neutral reference and agree that I resigned rather than being fired.

Whew.

[bean29]

That means your pension will vest?

[TheOtherMe]

Congrats!  

Same question on pension.  

From experience, I'm guessing you are exhausted, so get some rest.

[dee27]

Congratulations and I am happy that the mediation went smoothly.

[finnime]

This is the total. Pension will vest depending on the outcome of two cases before the Supreme Court that test the definition of pension plans that are not ERISA.

Without the resources that my (very large company) former employer has, I did pretty well all told. I didn't know when I filed with the  EEOC that I could have filed concurrently with my state and my county. They are more employee-friendly.

Had we not settled, my former employer would have been able to afford it, and wait it out if litigation is pursued.

For everyone who  has or knows someone with major depression, get a statement in writing from your doctor. That will give you protection from adverse employment action due to symptoms if it ever becomes needed. My former manager knew - I had told him several times - but he did not ask and I had not given  him written confirmation. That weakened my case.

For  now, I'm whole for more than another year financially. Amazing what the tax-free vs. taxable nature of the funds makes. Close to an extra $40,000.

[Shooby]

Feb 3, 2018 9:45:47 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

I wish when I was struggling with depression I had had a manager who understood.  All I was getting from him was the trite you just have to make it go away.  No, I couldn't.  It is not that way when you have depression.

Which is why I don't think it is any of their business at all what an employee is dealing with.  If you have a medical issue, i suppose they have to know on some level  but really it is best to not involve them because they don't get it.

[TheOtherMe]

Feb 7, 2018 4:57:43 GMT -5 finnime said:

For everyone who  has or knows someone with major depression, get a statement in writing from your doctor. That will give you protection from adverse employment action due to symptoms if it ever becomes needed. My former manager knew - I had told him several times - but he did not ask and I had not given  him written confirmation. That weakened my case.

This and I did not know that.  In my case, my boss still didn't believe me even though I had given him a doctor's note.  Long time ago.  I'm sure he's been educated by now.

[finnime]

One last thing I see I need to do now, that I really had not considered, is applying for SSDA. It should cover the period between 6 months after I lost my job and until I realize a sufficient income.

It's weird, but I didn't think of myself as disabled during the past 3 years, although clearly I have been. Depression is a sneaky bastard. I forsee my future will see bursts of income- I will be able to get work leading projects, I am fairly confident - and don't need the usual benefits, since DH is a federal retiree.

Cobbling together a future.

[bean29]

My Dad tried to get SSDA, he was bipolar, had arthritis and had broken his hip. They denied him. He never appealed it though. They lived on savings & took his pension early. They should have appealed it. Don’t expect to get it on your first try. Apply, (I hear everyone is denied on 1 st try) then appeal denial, and expect process to take about a full year.

[resolution]

The overwhelming majority are denied on initial application, but the ones that get to the second level of the appeal process (in front of the administrative law judge) are usually approved. www.ssdrc.com/5-72.html

[finnime]

Thank you. I will expect to have to appeal. By the time I do get it, I also fully expect to be able to earn enough income myself, but this should help cover some of the gap opened up financially in the past two years.

I'm sure head cases are harder to get through, too.