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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2015 14:50:00 GMT -5
Their tax situation should improve, so the single income should net more than it does currently. Plus they will get 2 new dependants and the child tax credit.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Sept 7, 2015 14:52:57 GMT -5
And it made for an interesting night because was a group of 20 of us at the restaurant (party for mutual friend): - on one side you have the parents to be freaking out (twins) - parents of a 3 and 2 year old and the father wants the wife to stay home and she absolutely refuses. She said she needs grown up conversation so now they have a nanny. She will consider staying home when the kids start kindergarten and she can stay busy doing other things while they are in school. - parents of a newborn and talking about the price of daycare. - parents of a 2 year old trying to decide if they wanted another and the wife was saying she was waiting for her daughter to be out of diapers first. They keep costs down by getting lots of hands me downs. - another with a son that was 10 months old and did a work/life balance at work so work from home a couple of days a week so only need daycare 2 days a week so that save them major money! And here we were DINKS seating in the middle of all that ...
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Sept 7, 2015 14:59:52 GMT -5
...:::"...but this is how I feel right now and I being honest about it.":::...
And it is perfectly fine to have these feelings and express them to us. But math is a cruel bitch and won't bend the outcome just because you've gotten used to being fancy free.
I'm curious to see how those new tax credits stack up against the new expenses. I thought it was a myth that the tax deductions offset the cost of the little bugg...nnnldes of joy in the first place.
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gooddecisions
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Post by gooddecisions on Sept 7, 2015 15:03:07 GMT -5
I am not going to lie, I am totally freaked out about going from $560/week to almost $800/week. My daycare bill will be more than my take home. But I can't look it like that. If I quit, I would automatically lose $80k/year. I don't love to work and I am resourceful enough to find other outlets for adult conversation. For us, it is best to suck it up and stay the course.
The only way we are dropping down to one income will be because of involuntary unemployment or illness or some other unthinkable life event.
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mamasita99
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Post by mamasita99 on Sept 7, 2015 15:03:17 GMT -5
And it made for an interesting night because was a group of 20 of us at the restaurant (party for mutual friend): - on one side you have the parents to be freaking out (twins) - parents of a 3 and 2 year old and the father wants the wife to stay home and she absolutely refuses. She said she needs grown up conversation so now they have a nanny. She will consider staying home when the kids start kindergarten and she can stay busy doing other things while they are in school. - parents of a newborn and talking about the price of daycare. - parents of a 2 year old trying to decide if they wanted another and the wife was saying she was waiting for her daughter to be out of diapers first. They keep costs down by getting lots of hands me downs. - another with a son that was 10 months old and did a work/life balance at work so work from home a couple of days a week so only need daycare 2 days a week so that save them major money! And here we were DINKS seating in the middle of all that ... They were probably envious of all your extra cash. Since you don't have kids yet, you must be rich?!
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Sept 7, 2015 15:08:54 GMT -5
And it made for an interesting night because was a group of 20 of us at the restaurant (party for mutual friend): - on one side you have the parents to be freaking out (twins) - parents of a 3 and 2 year old and the father wants the wife to stay home and she absolutely refuses. She said she needs grown up conversation so now they have a nanny. She will consider staying home when the kids start kindergarten and she can stay busy doing other things while they are in school. - parents of a newborn and talking about the price of daycare. - parents of a 2 year old trying to decide if they wanted another and the wife was saying she was waiting for her daughter to be out of diapers first. They keep costs down by getting lots of hands me downs. - another with a son that was 10 months old and did a work/life balance at work so work from home a couple of days a week so only need daycare 2 days a week so that save them major money! And here we were DINKS seating in the middle of all that ... They were probably envious of all your extra cash. Since you don't have kids yet, you must be rich?! I think they were more envious of the fact that I sleep till 12PM, 3 PM or 5 PM on my days off. I did make sure to point out that I do get up in between to walk Max or get something to eat. But yes on average I am not up fore 10AM or Noon on my days off.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Sept 7, 2015 15:25:40 GMT -5
I am not going to lie, I am totally freaked out about going from $560/week to almost $800/week. My daycare bill will be more than my take home. But I can't look it like that. If I quit, I would automatically lose $80k/year. I don't love to work and I am resourceful enough to find other outlets for adult conversation. For us, it is best to suck it up and stay the course. The only way we are dropping down to one income will be because of involuntary unemployment or illness or some other unthinkable life event. Once they are all out of daycare are you throwing yourselves a party?
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milee
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Post by milee on Sept 7, 2015 17:05:02 GMT -5
First thing your friends need to do is sell their "older" BMW. Even if they don't make much money on it, they need to get rid of it because older BMWs are prone to expensive repair needs. Fatal for a family that will be budgeting every penny. It may be running well now, but the next repair could easily be a $2000 one. Sell immediately.
Part of being able to manage on a shoestring is to not only minimize fixed expenses but avoid committing to being locked into or dependent on things that are prone to unexpected and expensive repairs. It's beyond dumb to own a BMW, Mercedes, Mini, Rover, Audi, Jag or anything similar - even if it's paid for - if you can't afford a $2k repair out of pocket on any given week.
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milee
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Post by milee on Sept 7, 2015 17:24:47 GMT -5
Exactly. Nothing can be sacred or off limits when you don't have enough. Not even considering my wife here but just ME... I have a hard time coming to that point. Ex: today a lady was shopping with her husband and their child. She had he coupons, her smart phone, the ad and a calculator . Every purchase was carefully calculated and items were not purchased if not on the list or not on sale. I freaking work hard damnit for my money, if I want to buy freaking Oreo cookies I am going to buy Oreo cookies wether on sale or not or on the list or not. I know sometimes you are forced into that situation (and others it is a choice); but working in a grocery store and seeing folks from different walks of life: one of the simple pleasures I do enjoy (and maybe take for granted) is buying what I want when I want it , not price comparing we want Barilla, Ragu, Tide, Charming Soft, wether on sale or not. And yes I know that mindset would need to change if we were the one facing a 40% paycut essentially ; but this is how I feel right now and I being honest about it. Food for thought... this is the exact attitude my husband has. I understand why he feels this way. He grew up with nothing, put himself through college and now earns a very good income. He has had to work hard for what he got and thinks it's reasonable to enjoy it.
The problem with that mindset in general is that it will prevent you from doing much in the way of saving at any income level. Because the more income you make, the sillier it will seem to have to make choices for budgeting small amounts.
DH's spending patterns and attitude sound very similar to yours. When we met, he was the chief engineer at an electronics company and I was a college student. I had great scholarship (which I worked hard to find and maintain) and worked as a waitress. Guess who had more in savings and disposable income?
DH's attitude has never changed. If he earns $1, he spends it. If I hadn't constantly (and sometimes in secret) saved our money, we'd have no savings and nothing saved for retirement, even though we have a great income. You don't want to go down that road. It starts with Oreos, but the Oreos aren't the issue, it's that mindset of "I work hard and I deserve it!" The minimum wage people work hard, too. Nobody deserves Oreos or a BMW, and the sooner you can get over yourself, the sooner you'll stop constantly looking for ways to piss away every extra cent you make.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2015 17:49:55 GMT -5
I think there are some posters and their friends that need to get very serious about saving money, paying off debt, and going to no or much later in life children.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2015 18:27:17 GMT -5
That is amazingly succinct and really helpful to those of us that will listen to it.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Sept 7, 2015 18:34:18 GMT -5
Tell them to d/l the free trial of YNAB and put the new income and outgo figures in there. As they see the available funds dwindle rapidly, only then will they be able to determine what can stay and what can go.
If they don't know where to start getting the line items for the budget, I'd be happy to post our 30 lines of expenses that are budgeted for each month. But remember, we don't have a mortgage and we have no car payments or student loans. I am sure they can figure it out: he manages a bank for a living Or I assume they can! This guy could afford it too, until he couldn't and got caught. You don't screw a bank owned by the Walton family that owns Walmart. www.thecitywire.com/node/32467#.Ve4eSdFCKcw
Dennis Smiley, doing business as HDS Holdings LLC, was sued March 25 by Delta Trust & Bank in Benton County, over a personal loan default – it was latest shoe to drop in an unfolding saga surrounding Smiley’s sudden resignation March 13 as president of Arvest Bank Benton County.
He also faces a loan fraud investigation first reported by Arkansas Business on April 2. This report claims one of the loan payments did not clear Smiley’s bank account on March 10, which raised a red flag that led to his resignation.
Sources who asked for anonymity have told The City Wire that numerous Arkansas banks had lent Smiley money over the past four years and he each time he pledged the same restricted Arvest shares for collateral. Smiley reportedly borrowed an estimated $4.5 million from more than a dozen Arkansas banks dating back to 2009, according to Uniform Commercial Code filings with Arkansas Security of State.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2015 18:41:04 GMT -5
Tell them to d/l the free trial of YNAB and put the new income and outgo figures in there. As they see the available funds dwindle rapidly, only then will they be able to determine what can stay and what can go.
If they don't know where to start getting the line items for the budget, I'd be happy to post our 30 lines of expenses that are budgeted for each month. But remember, we don't have a mortgage and we have no car payments or student loans. I am sure they can figure it out: he manages a bank for a living Or I assume they can! I've noticed that sometimes people who are great at what they do in their professional lives, don't necessarily put those same skills or knowledge to use in their personal lives. Some do, some don't. What's the saying, the cobbler's children have no shoes?
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on Sept 7, 2015 18:54:28 GMT -5
Exactly. Nothing can be sacred or off limits when you don't have enough. Not even considering my wife here but just ME... I have a hard time coming to that point. Ex: today a lady was shopping with her husband and their child. She had he coupons, her smart phone, the ad and a calculator . Every purchase was carefully calculated and items were not purchased if not on the list or not on sale. This was me, 10+ years ago (but no smartphone). Drove DH crazy, but he knows it is what allowed me to pay off the mortgage 15 years early, work up to maxing retirement accounts, and agree to DH taking summer school off after needing that income for years. Now shopping this style is second nature, and I have all but abandoned coupons, skip the formal list (it's basically in my head), and jump on unexpected sales and deals I spot in store even if i didn't plan to buy that item this week. I can spend more freely now, because I kept a tight rein early on.I freaking work hard damnit for my money, if I want to buy freaking Oreo cookies I am going to buy Oreo cookies wether on sale or not or on the list or not. My mindset is different: I work hard for my money, I don't want to waste it on the Oreo "brand" and packaging if all I want is cookies, I want to keep that "extra" money.I know sometimes you are forced into that situation (and others it is a choice); but working in a grocery store and seeing folks from different walks of life: one of the simple pleasures I do enjoy (and maybe take for granted) is buying what I want when I want it , not price comparing we want Barilla, Ragu, Tide, Charming Soft, wether on sale or not. And yes I know that mindset would need to change if we were the one facing a 40% paycut essentially ; but this is how I feel right now and I being honest about it. I wanted the simple pleasure of being master of my own time, aka not having to work for a living. So I need to have enough money saved to create a passive income for us to live off of instead. I'd rather "spend" my money on FIRE than on the ability to buy name brands at full price. Of course, now the pursuit itself is a fun game to me. DH was laughing at me because I was so excited to learn of a new loophole today, that would allow DS2 to fund his own HSA (in addition to ours), because he is under 26 and on our insurance but not our dependent.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2015 19:00:24 GMT -5
I think there are some posters and their friends that need to get very serious about saving money, paying off debt, and going to no or much later in life children. You can't take your savings with you when you die. Saving more isn't a bad idea, but avoiding procreation or other major life goals just to have a bigger savings account sounds like a really good way to ensure you die bitter, full of regret, and lonely. You'll also die rich, not that anyone will be around to give a shit or put a gold star on your coffin. Be smart financially, avoid large fixed expenses, keep a little something in savings, and all that, but you have to be able to spend some of it on things that bring you joy or what's the point of living? I agree to some extent but all people die alone in the end. No one should plan on a child to either help them as they age or most assuredly, not support them financially. No one should have a child just cause they feel they're entitled to. Just like no one should get a degree in "whatever" just because they like it then be unhappy because they end up working for minimum wage and can't live like they want or can't start a family. Student loans for degrees that don't pay dick are no one's fault but the person who got them. If you're that stupid to take out 100k in student loans for a job paying 30-40k, maybe you shouldn't procreate at all.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2015 19:13:55 GMT -5
Well, let me tell you when my/our income went from 150k to 30k. In the matter of a few months thanks to a divorce. First of all, I was lucky in that he wanted to hang onto his yacht at any price so I took my half of the value and bought a place free and clear. That helped hugely. If I hadn't been able to do that, yes, as awful as it would have been, I'd have been living off family, either my grandparents or my mom, in one of their rentals, until I could make enough money to support myself and my kids. I'm not "entitled" to live where I wanted to live, in the manner I wanted to live, unless I can afford it.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2015 19:28:46 GMT -5
I think there are some posters and their friends that need to get very serious about saving money, paying off debt, and going to no or much later in life children. You can't take your savings with you when you die. Saving more isn't a bad idea, but avoiding procreation or other major life goals just to have a bigger savings account sounds like a really good way to ensure you die bitter, full of regret, and lonely. You'll also die rich, not that anyone will be around to give a shit or put a gold star on your coffin. Be smart financially, avoid large fixed expenses, keep a little something in savings, and all that, but you have to be able to spend some of it on things that bring you joy or what's the point of living? For me, it's what's the point of working. I use to feel like I could just buy whatever I wanted within reason, since I went to work every damn day. But then I ended up having to do what's been mentioned here and put every single expense I had on the table, including my housing costs, and decide whether to keep the expense, reduce it, or eliminate it because I had enough unexpected bills to turn my world upside down. It was difficult because I honestly didn't believe I'd been living above my means because I made decent money and I wasn't living lavish, but like WWBG said, math doesn't lie. It's a real eye-opener when you realize how much money can be/has been frittered away on things that you don't even really value. I guess it's ok if you're lucky enough that nothing ever goes seriously wrong. I've accepted that saving is not optional, but saving still doesn't motivate me to work. I work to have money to spend and enjoy life. I'm still a spender at heart. So, to manage my tendencies better, I keep my committed expenses farily low so I can save like I should and still spend like I want to sometimes. I'm also much pickier about what I'm willing to spend my money on and how much, so I can have more to spend on things that matter to me. But it's just me making all the decisions. I'm sure that makes things a lot simpler in many ways.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2015 19:45:28 GMT -5
I agree to some extent but all people die alone in the end. No one should plan on a child to either help them as they age or most assuredly, not support them financially. No one should have a child just cause they feel they're entitled to. Just like no one should get a degree in "whatever" just because they like it then be unhappy because they end up working for minimum wage and can't live like they want or can't start a family. Student loans for degrees that don't pay dick are no one's fault but the person who got them. If you're that stupid to take out 100k in student loans for a job paying 30-40k, maybe you shouldn't procreate at all. And if everyone waited to have kids until YM and the Phil script said they should the human race would die out in one generation. Sometimes you gotta do things just because you want to. Not the way some people breed. Unfortunately the ones breeding like rabbits are not the ones that should be.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Sept 7, 2015 20:08:27 GMT -5
If you're that stupid to take out 100k in student loans for a job paying 30-40k, maybe you shouldn't procreate at all. Yea because taking 100k in loans while making 45k is right along the lines of child molesting, child neglect and child endangerment.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 7, 2015 20:20:39 GMT -5
Nope, but it sure cuts into disposable spending for years. Disposable is what pays for things like houses, utilities, maintenance, cars, food, clothing, then stuff for baby/child. Daycare, diapers, stuff. When a student loan is the size of a housepayment and for almost as many years, it makes other choices a lot harder. 45k seems a lot, then you have taxes on that. Could someone making 45k pay a school loan and have a house, travel, clothes, car, and then babies?
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quince
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Post by quince on Sept 7, 2015 21:31:29 GMT -5
My husband has actually gotten me to loosen up a lot about spending. This is, of course, with the understanding that if we need to, we will tighten right back up again.
For us, the loosening up of spending isn't so much "what's the point of life without spending?" as "What's the point of money if you don't use it to make your life easier?"
Making your life easier includes: Not having to worry about paying bills in the present, frivolous spending, and taking care of yourself in retirement.
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lurkyloo
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Post by lurkyloo on Sept 7, 2015 21:38:03 GMT -5
I married well Does he have a sister He does! She doesn't earn like he does, but she is extremely attractive and newly single More seriously, once your friends have had a chance to get over the initial shock I would try to gently make sure they're aware of the possible medico-financial side. As I understand it, twins are generally born before the standard 40 weeks = less time to plan and prepare. If they come too early there can be significant and expensive medical issues associated with preemies; if her doctor thinks there is risk of preterm birth he may order bed rest; double the babies greatly increases stress on the mother and the risk of PPD. None of this is certain and hopefully some would be covered by health or short term disability insurance; in any case it's something to be discussed in detail with the doctor rather than over cocktails. But a healthy emergency fund just got really important for your friends. Best wishes to them. ...having just skimmed the rest of the thread: Impulse spending and expenses overall get waaayyy worse with a kid Not spending anything I can't afford, but I feel like I'm wasting a lot more money these days than I used to.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Sept 7, 2015 21:44:35 GMT -5
I am sure they can figure it out: he manages a bank for a living Or I assume they can! I've noticed that sometimes people who are great at what they do in their professional lives, don't necessarily put those same skills or knowledge to use in their personal lives. Some do, some don't. What's the saying, the cobbler's children have no shoes? You get the Post of the Day, @pinkcshmere!
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Sept 7, 2015 21:49:26 GMT -5
Exactly. Nothing can be sacred or off limits when you don't have enough. Not even considering my wife here but just ME... I have a hard time coming to that point. Ex: today a lady was shopping with her husband and their child. She had he coupons, her smart phone, the ad and a calculator . Every purchase was carefully calculated and items were not purchased if not on the list or not on sale. I freaking work hard damnit for my money, if I want to buy freaking Oreo cookies I am going to buy Oreo cookies wether on sale or not or on the list or not. I know sometimes you are forced into that situation (and others it is a choice); but working in a grocery store and seeing folks from different walks of life: one of the simple pleasures I do enjoy (and maybe take for granted) is buying what I want when I want it , not price comparing we want Barilla, Ragu, Tide, Charming Soft, wether on sale or not. And yes I know that mindset would need to change if we were the one facing a 40% paycut essentially ; but this is how I feel right now and I being honest about it. No one suggested you don't work hard for your money. Most folks do.
However, when you have to cut your budget to the bone, you learn tricks. It's not that you can never have Oreos again, it's that you learn the sale cycle of Oreos (do they go on sale, for example, every 6 to 8 weeks?) and you stock up on your guilty pleasure when they're on sale, & use coupons. When they are full price, you don't buy them. It's not a punishment, it's learning a new way to live.
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❤ mollymouser ❤
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Post by ❤ mollymouser ❤ on Sept 7, 2015 22:04:32 GMT -5
Disclaimer: I didn't read all 7 pages of this topic.
In 2005, we made the decision to go from two incomes down to one. As you might expect, it required a fairly drastic change in spending and lifestyle choices ~ but we were both committed to making it work. Fortunately, when we purchased our home in 2003, we opted to get no more of a 15-year mortgage that we could ~ if necessary ~ afford on just a single income. This turned out to be a wise decision.
As for budget cuts and spending/lifestyle changes ... there have been quite a few over the years. My wonderful DH drives a 13-year-old car. I drive a 9-yr-old car. Vacations in the last 10 years have been saved up for and cash-flowed, and are often just 2-3 days at the coast (driving distance for us). Neither one of us has a Smart Phone.... in fact, we share a flip phone for personal use and it works just fine. We keep our house much warmer in the summer and cooler in the winter than many others ... but it helps keep our freakishly-high electricity costs in check. We don't buy designer clothes, designer shoes, designer purses. We don't spend money on coffee and we both (usually) pack our lunches for work. (I volunteer full time for a non-profit which I refer to as "work" ... but I don't get paid) We have sinking funds for things like home repairs and renovations and car repairs and appliance replacement and vet costs for our pets.
We're not weirdly frugal ... we still employ a gardener who mows/edges our lawn, and we still (gasp) have cable. Heck, it's digital cable with Starz, because I must watch Outlander (grin). We go out to eat when we want, but we keep an eye on our spending and our budget and we often choose local restaurants that are on the less-expensive side of things.
It CAN be done ... but it can take effort, creativity, flexibility, patience, and a strong sense of "cooperation and we're in this together" with one's spouse. But it CAN be done.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2015 22:07:26 GMT -5
I work hard for my money too, that's why I want to get the most bang for every dollar that I can. I'm careful at the grocery store because I have a teen that eats non-stop. Loss leader sales dictate a lot of our meals. That and bulk buying...just bought a 50 pound bag of rice today. That should last him a while.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Sept 8, 2015 5:11:15 GMT -5
I work hard for my money too, that's why I want to get the most bang for every dollar that I can. I'm careful at the grocery store because I have a teen that eats non-stop. Loss leader sales dictate a lot of our meals. That and bulk buying...just bought a 50 pound bag of rice today. That should last him a while. Exactly. I work hard for my money, so I don't want to get screwed on purchases when I use it.
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973beachbum
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Post by 973beachbum on Sept 8, 2015 7:35:52 GMT -5
Not even considering my wife here but just ME... I have a hard time coming to that point. Ex: today a lady was shopping with her husband and their child. She had he coupons, her smart phone, the ad and a calculator . Every purchase was carefully calculated and items were not purchased if not on the list or not on sale. I freaking work hard damnit for my money, if I want to buy freaking Oreo cookies I am going to buy Oreo cookies wether on sale or not or on the list or not. I know sometimes you are forced into that situation (and others it is a choice); but working in a grocery store and seeing folks from different walks of life: one of the simple pleasures I do enjoy (and maybe take for granted) is buying what I want when I want it , not price comparing we want Barilla, Ragu, Tide, Charming Soft, wether on sale or not. And yes I know that mindset would need to change if we were the one facing a 40% paycut essentially ; but this is how I feel right now and I being honest about it. No one suggested you don't work hard for your money. Most folks do.
However, when you have to cut your budget to the bone, you learn tricks. It's not that you can never have Oreos again, it's that you learn the sale cycle of Oreos (do they go on sale, for example, every 6 to 8 weeks?) and you stock up on your guilty pleasure when they're on sale, & use coupons. When they are full price, you don't buy them. It's not a punishment, it's learning a new way to live.
I also feel I work very hard for my money, and there is even a case to be made that the less I have made the harder I worked for it. But I do understand wanting some small things when you want them. We don't have good portion control in my house. I know you all are shocked! So buying four packages of Oreos would mean everyone eating more oreos not saving them for later. So some frugal hacks work for some but not for others. The key to me is to figure out what is important to you even within catagories like groceries. Some people could care less about what brand of cookies they eat, others don't want Hydrox they want the real Oreos. To stay on budget, which some of us have had to live on real tight ones, you have to choose what is that only treat or wait until it is on sale or find a new way to get it for the amount you can afford. It could be using coupons. Working in a grocery store I am sure you see plenty of vendors who may have coupons. The key to me is knowing how much you have to spend on something and actually spending it thoughtfully and intentionally. The times when we feel the most poor are the times when money seems to just disappear and no one knows where it actually went. That sucks!
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973beachbum
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Politics Admin
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:12:13 GMT -5
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Post by 973beachbum on Sept 8, 2015 8:03:34 GMT -5
I want to add that the mindset about money can be very hard to deal with IMO. DH grew up really poor. And I mean like his parents struggled to pay the $100 mortgage payment and used to drive to PA to hunt to get food. We have talked about it since and I seriously doubt that they actually saved anything after the costs of equipment and gas ect to drive up there and hunt to get the meat is added in. But I know for a fact that they wouldn't think about something like that it just wasn't thought of as important to them. In their mind groceries were expensive and hunting equaled free meat. No facts would have ever changed their mind. His dad always bought Snap On tools and the most expensive clothes and boots for work. Of course he needed tools and clothes, but did he really need the most expensive ones he could find? It really didn't matter to him because he felt he "needed" it and it was that or be unemployed. Nothing would have made him ever think otherwise. So Dad got new $300 boots every year and the kids mowed lawns to buy food like bologna and bread themselves as little kids to eat for lunch. The worst part was his parents would just find it and eat it all before they did. Because of course Dad can't go to work without lunch. But if DH talked to his dad today about it it would never be accepted that maybe he was wrong to buy those overly expensive things and not be able to buy food. So as an adult DH struggles with the opposite. He had to break the "I deserve" mentality that came from knowing how much more money he made than both of his parents combined. In his mind his parents made almost nothing and still went on long vacations every year to their trailer in PA. His dad always had the best tools and work clothes. So why can't he afford the best whatever? It just didn't compute emotionally. And of course I got to be the bad guy. That was fun!
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whoisjohngalt
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Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:12:07 GMT -5
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Sept 8, 2015 8:12:46 GMT -5
I don't think it's hard to go from two income to one for your regular daily life.
I think it's very hard to still be able to save for retirement and feel comfortable that you won't be eating cat food.
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