Lack of parenting in restaurants - vent about a friend

[bobosensei]

Aug 26, 2015 13:05:46 GMT -5 Angel! said:

Aug 26, 2015 12:53:13 GMT -5 Wisconsin Beth said:

I read it as plunking the kid down on top of the table and feeding him there.  Not setting the kid in booster/highchair/lap and eating food placed on the table.  I'll go back to reread.

Maybe I misread it. I just saw a couple of "my kids always ate from a plate" responses so commented that DS2 certainly didn't.

Although he has never been sat directly on the table at home or anywhere else.

The baby was put on top of the table from the time we got in the restaurant until the entrees came.  While we had appetizers he was still sitting on the tabletop eating (throwing stuff, and tearing up anything he could get his hands on), but when the first plate came they put him in the highchair.  His food was served directly on the wood tabletop.  Now while I did think it was gross and weird to let him eat right off the wood (remember his shoes had just been there too) I wasn't too bothered because I figured they would clean up the mess.  After all, they told me they do clean up after him, but they did not make a single swipe after the beans and rice crusted up and dried to the table.

[bobosensei]

Aug 26, 2015 13:07:59 GMT -5 Knee Deep in Water Chloe said:

Well that sounds like a hideous time. 

My DH refuses to eat at my mother's house. It's gawful dirty. 

bobosensei, What made you friends with this person in the first place? Is that worth maintaining the friendship?

I met her through some mutual friends back in 2010.  First I met 2 great ladies who had moved to Germany at the same time she did, that was how she became known to my group of friends.  The reason I met the other ladies was that our husbands all worked together.  I started hanging out with them, but they mainly did things as a large group invite so usually there would be 9-10 ladies either at someone's home or at a restaurant.  And the first 18 months or so that I knew her I saw her maybe every couple of months as part of a group, but I avoided her because I thought she was loud and she got on my nerves.  This was easy enough to do without offended the people I really wanted to be around.  For some reason she really wanted to be friends.  I don't know if it was because I didn't pay attention to her or what, but I told her she was too loud and she changed her behavior around me.  We both ended up doing some volunteer work for an organization and as we worked together I found some common interests.  In early 2012 she started working at the same nonprofit as me, but at a different location about 40 minutes away.  3 months later I quit my job and moved and just assumed I wouldn't see her again because I lived 5 hours away.  And for the most part I haven't.  We might talk on the phone once every couple of months, but most of the time it is about stuff at the place I used to work and she needs advice.  And last year DH had some medical stuff done at the place she worked, and while he was at appointments I stopped by her work to talk to her and we had dinner with them.  So I wouldn't classify this as the kind of friendship that I put much work into, but I've known her a while now.  She has a lot of acquaintances, but it doesn't seem like many friends.  Back in May she asked me to watch her kid while she was in a work conference, she was going to pay my way at a pretty nice resort because she didn't want to get some of the immunizations required for her son to go to daycare, but I refused.  And honestly I thought she wouldn't speak to me again.  But it is like the friendship that won't die.  And I admit most of the reason I pick up the phone is because I am interested in the gossip she has from the place that I worked.  The whole reason I went to see her this last time is that my old boss was in town and she was in charge of the itinerary so she got me 2 hours with her so that I could see her.

[zibazinski]

Move on.

[tskeeter]

Aug 26, 2015 7:24:36 GMT -5 ArchietheDragon said:

We went out to dinner a few nights ago with a friend.  Six kids 7 and under, 3 adults.  Holy shit, you should have seen it.    The babies crying, the other kids acting crazy.   Friggen Armageddon.   

Hey, that sounds like the house I grew up in.  Less one kid and one adult.

No wonder we didn't get many visitors.

[Angel!]

Aug 27, 2015 3:53:54 GMT -5 bobosensei said:

Aug 26, 2015 13:05:46 GMT -5 Angel! said:

Maybe I misread it. I just saw a couple of "my kids always ate from a plate" responses so commented that DS2 certainly didn't.

Although he has never been sat directly on the table at home or anywhere else.

The baby was put on top of the table from the time we got in the restaurant until the entrees came.  While we had appetizers he was still sitting on the tabletop eating (throwing stuff, and tearing up anything he could get his hands on), but when the first plate came they put him in the highchair.  His food was served directly on the wood tabletop.  Now while I did think it was gross and weird to let him eat right off the wood (remember his shoes had just been there too) I wasn't too bothered because I figured they would clean up the mess.  After all, they told me they do clean up after him, but they did not make a single swipe after the beans and rice crusted up and dried to the table.

Personally I wouldn't serve my kids beans or rice at a restaurant at that age anyway.  They will just make a huge mess.  I would stick with easy finger foods that aren't really messy.  At then end I wipe all the crumbs & bits of food off the table onto a plate.  Then leave a really big tip depending on the size of mess under the table from dropped food & crumbs.

Your friends are nuts.

[The Walk of the Penguin Mich]

I remember walking into a restaurant for Sunday brunch with my sister and her family.  4 kids, all under the age of 7 (7, 5, 3, 1) and we were a party of 8.  When we walked in, I saw diners cringe and I really didn't blame them.

I don't remember hearing my sister threaten her kid within an inch of their life to behave (but she probably did!), but those kids were utter jewels.  With 4 adults at the table, if one of the kids wanted something from the buffet, an adult took a kid and helped them get what they wanted.  There wasn't a lot of noise, nor was there a mess left.

On our way out, more than one diner complimented my sister on her kids and how well they behaved.

[andi9899]

I was waiting for one of Thing 1's concerts to start several months ago when a family sat down with a child that appeared to be about a year or two old. My antennas went up waiting for the kid to start screaming. He never did. He was very well behaved and I was quite impressed. Way better than the whiny kid behind us at the last concert who looked to be about 8. Even after I turned around and told her parents that I came to hear my kid sing and couldn't because of all the noise, they still just ignored her incessant whining. Ugh.