andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Aug 26, 2015 9:16:44 GMT -5
We went out to dinner a few nights ago with a friend. Six kids 7 and under, 3 adults. Holy shit, you should have seen it. The babies crying, the other kids acting crazy. Friggen Armageddon. When I see a table like this I quickly size up my options. I will ask to be seated on the opposite end of the restaurant if it is far enough away that I can't hear all the chaos that well. If it is not possible due to the size of the restaurant or the fact that you have too loud of a party, I will turn around and leave. I'm not paying money to sit there and listen to screaming kids or watch them run around or whatever it is that is going on. I'd rather go elsewhere or go home.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Aug 26, 2015 9:38:37 GMT -5
How on earth do they think that their kid will get what is right and what is wrong if they don't tell him? I think with a 1 year old you're pretty much limited to distract and/or remove from the situation. But you can model good behavior from the beginning. You don't want your 2 year old sitting on the restaurant table, don't set the kid up there every time you go to be the restaurant and then later expect them not to do it. We start having the kids help pick up at 6 months old. It is more they are with us as we pick up. But we figure they are never too young to pick up their toys.
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Ombud
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Post by Ombud on Aug 26, 2015 9:46:40 GMT -5
On a side note - I don't get people's desire to bring toddlers into restaurants. Even if it's family friendly restaurants. Yes, but I think this is a Catch 22. Kids don't know how to behave in public unless they are in public. one of the best things my DD & later DS did was to immediately remove child from restaurant when inappropriate. DD only had to do once that I am aware of, DS had to do a few times b4 the now 2 yo realized he wasn't in control at the table. But then it took several times at home too
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 26, 2015 9:51:03 GMT -5
We never took out kids our to restaurants regularly as babies, but we did at least a couple of times a year. What, are you never supposed to go out during that time--at all? We brought toys, snacks and drinks to keep them occupied. They sat in their high chairs, on our laps or on the booth seat. They were not allowed to roam. Even letting them sit on the booth seat was problematic, as they liked to stand up. Our main concern was to not annoy any of the other customers. They were pretty damn well behaved, apparently. The only time we ran into problems was when the wait was way too long for an adult, much less a child. The most annoying was waiting really long for the bill at the end of the meal. If you're a server and have a table with young ones, be as quick as you can with everything, and they'll cause you much less problems.
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lund
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Post by lund on Aug 26, 2015 11:52:33 GMT -5
My kid understood before age one that no (for instance when tugging at my hair, snatching glasses or similar) meant cease immediately or get a sudden transport to the play pen, crib, or, if not at home, somewhere away from the fun. That did not change until around the age of three, when a lengthy period of testing limits started.
(And then I had to get out to the car with a kid angrily howling so it probably could be heard the next two blocks over while DH finished shopping. And no, my misbehaving kid did not get the wanted toy. After that plus some playground incidents when I walked home with about 35 pounds of howling and kicking kid over my shoulder, it finally became clear that Mom still meant and means business when she says no. Around that time, thankfully the understanding of Mom's explanations started too.)
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Aug 26, 2015 12:43:59 GMT -5
I went through a period where I served DS2 right on the table. Maybe you all have more time or energy than me, but all too often he would the food and throw the bowl and I didn't want to have to keep cleaning it up. I especially didn't want the embarrassment of a thrown plate in a restaurant, so I would just put a few bites of food down at a time on the table. This was probably age 10-15 months. He is 21 months now and does fine.
The rest of the behavior I find fairly awful though.
I am surprised how many of you give snacks prior to the meal being served. I really try to limit that unless someone is starving and going to have a meltdown. Otherwise by the time the food comes my kids are half full and finish really quick. Then they are really hard to keep distracted and occupied while I'm also trying to enjoy my meal. I'd rather try to distract them while waiting for the food than while I'm trying to eat.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Aug 26, 2015 12:49:57 GMT -5
you deserve a medal for not getting up and walking out... because honestly, I probably would have. Seriously. no way i could have sat through that without losing my $hit! I hope they at least picked up the tab!
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Aug 26, 2015 12:53:13 GMT -5
I went through a period where I served DS2 right on the table. Maybe you all have more time or energy than me, but all too often he would the food and throw the bowl and I didn't want to have to keep cleaning it up. I especially didn't want the embarrassment of a thrown plate in a restaurant, so I would just put a few bites of food down at a time on the table. This was probably age 10-15 months. He is 21 months now and does fine. The rest of the behavior I find fairly awful though. I am surprised how many of you give snacks prior to the meal being served. I really try to limit that unless someone is starving and going to have a meltdown. Otherwise by the time the food comes my kids are half full and finish really quick. Then they are really hard to keep distracted and occupied while I'm also trying to enjoy my meal. I'd rather try to distract them while waiting for the food than while I'm trying to eat. I read it as plunking the kid down on top of the table and feeding him there. Not setting the kid in booster/highchair/lap and eating food placed on the table. I'll go back to reread.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 26, 2015 12:55:13 GMT -5
At 12 months, my kids didn't eat restaurant food yet. I was really slow with introducing them to table food. They might have eaten bread and french fries, so I'd bring a jar of babyfood to give them for some real nutrition. Not saying it's right, just how we got through those years.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Aug 26, 2015 13:03:35 GMT -5
I read it as the kid was put on the table sitting with his dirty shoes on it and proceeded to eat from the same table. And either way, ew! I won't even use my fork again if it touches the table. I can't imagine allowing my child to eat directly from it. You don't know how well the table was cleaned. At least the plates were run through a dishwasher.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Aug 26, 2015 13:04:07 GMT -5
This sort of came up at the babyshower we had at work yesterday. During setup, someone commented on the loud children she's seen in a restaurant and wondered about talking to the parents. I told her she'd probably be better off going though the staff to address the complaints.
But then again, I'm assuming that if someone's out with loud/obnoxious kids one of the following is true: A. They know and are trying to get done and out (this would be me.) or B. They don't give a rat's ass and it's going to escalate.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Aug 26, 2015 13:05:46 GMT -5
I went through a period where I served DS2 right on the table. Maybe you all have more time or energy than me, but all too often he would the food and throw the bowl and I didn't want to have to keep cleaning it up. I especially didn't want the embarrassment of a thrown plate in a restaurant, so I would just put a few bites of food down at a time on the table. This was probably age 10-15 months. He is 21 months now and does fine. The rest of the behavior I find fairly awful though. I am surprised how many of you give snacks prior to the meal being served. I really try to limit that unless someone is starving and going to have a meltdown. Otherwise by the time the food comes my kids are half full and finish really quick. Then they are really hard to keep distracted and occupied while I'm also trying to enjoy my meal. I'd rather try to distract them while waiting for the food than while I'm trying to eat. I read it as plunking the kid down on top of the table and feeding him there. Not setting the kid in booster/highchair/lap and eating food placed on the table. I'll go back to reread. Maybe I misread it. I just saw a couple of "my kids always ate from a plate" responses so commented that DS2 certainly didn't. Although he has never been sat directly on the table at home or anywhere else.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Aug 26, 2015 13:07:59 GMT -5
Well that sounds like a hideous time.
My DH refuses to eat at my mother's house. It's gawful dirty.
bobosensei, What made you friends with this person in the first place? Is that worth maintaining the friendship?
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Aug 26, 2015 13:08:28 GMT -5
I read it as the kid was put on the table sitting with his dirty shoes on it and proceeded to eat from the same table. And either way, ew! I won't even use my fork again if it touches the table. I can't imagine allowing my child to eat directly from it. You don't know how well the table was cleaned. At least the plates were run through a dishwasher. You are probably not surprised to hear that my kids eat off the table, the floor, the ground, etc. Especially the third kid. And i have sat my baby directly on the table both at home and at a restaurant. I am the worst!
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Aug 26, 2015 13:11:20 GMT -5
I read it as the kid was put on the table sitting with his dirty shoes on it and proceeded to eat from the same table. And either way, ew! I won't even use my fork again if it touches the table. I can't imagine allowing my child to eat directly from it. You don't know how well the table was cleaned. At least the plates were run through a dishwasher. You are probably not surprised to hear that my kids eat off the table, the floor, the ground, etc. Especially the third kid. And i have sat my baby directly on the table both at home and at a restaurant. I am the worst! I think the more you have the more relaxed you become. I know I certainly have. And when you realize you have limited control on what a kid will pick up off the floor and put in their mouth, eating off the table doesn't really seem that bad.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Aug 26, 2015 13:18:11 GMT -5
I'd have a really hard time handling 3 kids (especially alone!), even with DH helping.
However, bobo's friend had 1.
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Aug 26, 2015 13:23:05 GMT -5
We went out to dinner a few nights ago with a friend. Six kids 7 and under, 3 adults. Holy shit, you should have seen it. The babies crying, the other kids acting crazy. Friggen Armageddon. That was you??!!
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Aug 26, 2015 13:29:57 GMT -5
When my kids were just infants, and starting on solid foods, we stuck them in a summer infant seat that had a circle around it with toys. Sort of like a flying saucer. We stuck that smack in the middle of the table at home and fed them there. Never would have done that with company, or in a restaurant, and once they were bigger and sitting better, tbey went into the high chair.
Yes, they would eat stuff of our table or floor, but have you seen the rags they wipe ables with at restaurants? And they go from one table to the next... And sticky restaurant floors--at least at my house, the dirt is our own. :-p
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lexxy703
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Post by lexxy703 on Aug 26, 2015 13:30:20 GMT -5
I'm not sure the kid sitting on the table would bother me. The kid sticking his grubby fists in the communal bowl of chips would. Them letting him crawl around bothering other diners & getting underfoot of the wait staff is ridiculous. Dangerous for everyone involved. What if baby tripped a waitress & a sizzling skillet of fajitas landed on him? Your friends are really bad parents. No I don't have kids so I really shouldn't comment but I've been in restaurants with plenty of kids & it is not the norm for them to be crawling around.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 26, 2015 13:31:27 GMT -5
Definitely out of line. It's partly the baby's personality, of course- some are OK with sitting in one place and behaving and some are more active- but we've taken our granddaughter (now 16 months old) to good restaurants and she's been an angel. Sometimes one or the other of us will pick her up and walk her around if she gets restless, but we've always been prepared to have the food boxed and leave if she got crazy. I also noticed that my DIL puts just a few bits of food on the baby's tray at a time. That way, she doesn't have a whole pile of stuff she can throw on the floor. If she eats what's on her tray she gets more.
I feel bad for the parents AND the baby in the OP. It doesn't have to be that way.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Aug 26, 2015 13:40:32 GMT -5
Yes, but I think this is a Catch 22. Kids don't know how to behave in public unless they are in public. You don't have to go to a restaurant for that. I expect my kids to eat off a plate and not throw food at home. Also to be conscious of where their milk is because I don't want it spilled all over the floor. We have table rules too. We also have basic home rules, which are very similar to school rules, actually. And they are the same, generally, as the rules at the grands' house. Yet, my kids do not act the same way at home, at school, and at the grands' house. But, I will say it goes both ways..My DS, for instance, got through several years of being able to charm the teachers to get results that he wanted. One of the teachers even admitted it to us. He knows he doesn't get away with that at home. But, he's also admitted he'd never behave in school the way he behaves at home. We remove kids and eat in shifts if they are too roundy..
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Aug 26, 2015 13:58:41 GMT -5
I read it as plunking the kid down on top of the table and feeding him there. Not setting the kid in booster/highchair/lap and eating food placed on the table. I'll go back to reread. Maybe I misread it. I just saw a couple of "my kids always ate from a plate" responses so commented that DS2 certainly didn't. Although he has never been sat directly on the table at home or anywhere else. My kids didn't eat from a plate until I was sure they wouldn't fling it, but I read it as the kid was sitting on the table and basically climbing all over it. I've certainly set my kids on the table a time or too, but usually it was a brief moment. Not letting them climb all over things.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Aug 26, 2015 14:03:47 GMT -5
I'm not sure the kid sitting on the table would bother me. The kid sticking his grubby fists in the communal bowl of chips would. Them letting him crawl around bothering other diners & getting underfoot of the wait staff is ridiculous. Dangerous for everyone involved. What if baby tripped a waitress & a sizzling skillet of fajitas landed on him? Your friends are really bad parents. No I don't have kids so I really shouldn't comment but I've been in restaurants with plenty of kids & it is not the norm for them to be crawling around. I have kids, and you're right. I've had some miserable times in restaurants trying to keep my kids corralled but I would NEVER let one CRAWL around the place. That's just begging for injuries all around. Not sure I'd let a one year old have chips either. Do they even have enough teeth for them? (Long time since I had a one year old)
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Aug 26, 2015 14:06:20 GMT -5
I'm not sure the kid sitting on the table would bother me. The kid sticking his grubby fists in the communal bowl of chips would. Them letting him crawl around bothering other diners & getting underfoot of the wait staff is ridiculous. Dangerous for everyone involved. What if baby tripped a waitress & a sizzling skillet of fajitas landed on him? Your friends are really bad parents. No I don't have kids so I really shouldn't comment but I've been in restaurants with plenty of kids & it is not the norm for them to be crawling around. I have kids, and you're right. I've had some miserable times in restaurants trying to keep my kids corralled but I would NEVER let one CRAWL around the place. That's just begging for injuries all around. Not sure I'd let a one year old have chips either. Do they even have enough teeth for them? (Long time since I had a one year old) my 14 month old likes chips.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Aug 26, 2015 14:07:28 GMT -5
I have kids, and you're right. I've had some miserable times in restaurants trying to keep my kids corralled but I would NEVER let one CRAWL around the place. That's just begging for injuries all around. Not sure I'd let a one year old have chips either. Do they even have enough teeth for them? (Long time since I had a one year old) my 14 month old likes chips. He has enough teeth for them huh? That was my question since I forgot all the details/horrors.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Aug 26, 2015 14:13:08 GMT -5
my 14 month old likes chips. He has enough teeth for them huh? That was my question since I forgot all the details/horrors. he's got 8. enough for chips. Although he does poke his gums with a sharp piece every so often.
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lund
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Post by lund on Aug 26, 2015 14:23:32 GMT -5
The chips may be too salty to be healthy, and the fat may cause, hm, explosive digestion problems...
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Aug 26, 2015 15:57:45 GMT -5
Doesn't seem like the parents care if the baby sits in shit. So many people want children and can't have them and any moron can just breed. These are people I'd not be seeing again. They don't sound civilized
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saveinla
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Post by saveinla on Aug 26, 2015 16:20:29 GMT -5
my 14 month old likes chips. He has enough teeth for them huh? That was my question since I forgot all the details/horrors. I have seen kids mush them up with their gums and drool - since they like the taste of the salty chips
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Aug 26, 2015 16:27:11 GMT -5
He has enough teeth for them huh? That was my question since I forgot all the details/horrors. I have seen kids mush them up with their gums and drool - since they like the taste of the salty chips I was thinking of all the pointy corners chips can have. I try to not "poke the bear" with small kids when I'm in public with them. If there's potential to make them cry, I'd prefer to not do it.
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