How to not impress younger guys

[Opti]

Jun 15, 2015 16:02:19 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Jun 15, 2015 15:48:52 GMT -5 Opti said:

I guess that's why I unknowingly started this thread. I need to know how to manipulate men so they do the asking instead of me... encourage/manipulate... make the one with more $$ finance mutual meetings.................

But, yeah I really do need help to figure out, how to get someone to ask me out. That I really want to ask me out. That I would ask out, except I know I don't have funds for a date. (Damn that's confusing to me and I wrote it. Might rewrite after  a nap or something.

Come to the club with me. I'll show you how it's done.

I'd love to. Do you live at all near CNJ?

[andi9899]

No. I'm in KC. Sorry.

[Deleted]

Jun 15, 2015 16:07:41 GMT -5 Opti said:

Jun 14, 2015 21:25:58 GMT -5 @southernsusana said:

I hate to burst your bubble, but being impressed with your car isn't the same thing as being so impressed with you that he is willing to bridge the age gap for more than a one-nighter.

DH has a 2006 BMW, and lots of my students are "impressed."  They appreciate cars.  It isn't flirting when they talk me up about what the car has and does.

If you are twice his age . . . 2 x 15 is 30 and illegal.  2 x 20 is 40 and he is looking for Mommy.  2 x 30 is 60 and he is looking for money.  

Why are YOU interested?

Bless your heart, for your opinion.

Why is it some women can look for older men, and its about financial security and if its the reverse its something about mommy or worse?   It probably has roots in finances, or, that is my fear. No bubble bursting needed. I'm less impressed by my car than most people."If you are twice his age . . . 2 x 15 is 30 and illegal."

WTE? I'm 55, last I checked anyone over 18 is legal in all US states. My personal limit I set many years ago is 23. Unfortunately in 2010, 50-24 is 26 was OK. Was over 23. Didn't happen in the end, as I think it freaked both of us out, to seriously be attracted to each other.

I started the thread because while I might be OK with a temporary relationship, I am not interested or fishing for one night stands. I don't like rules, but I'd prefer 5 or less up and 12 max down.

 

 Thanks for the "bless your heart."  I'm Southern so I know how to interpret it. 

You took a snippet, though, and quoted it out of context.  I never said you were interested in a 15-year-old.  I was giving examples of 2X different ages. 

For what it is worth, I think a 20-year-old girl interested in a 40-year-old man is looking for a daddy figure as well.  I'm an equal opportunity offender. 

I based my comment on the fact that most 20-somethings are in the process of launching.  Most 40-somethings have launched and landed.  So the 40-something is generally more stable. 

However, it has since been clarified that the 20-something is interested in a different type of relationship than I was thinking about.  "Light and fun" was the description.  That sounds like more like "friends with benefits" than I was thinking about.

So at 61 I am too old for this conversation.  Half my age is approximately 31.  My kids are several years older than that.

Thanks again for the blessing. 

[Deleted]

Jun 15, 2015 18:23:32 GMT -5 @tbird said:

Jun 15, 2015 11:40:21 GMT -5 MJ2.0 said:

ahem, my 25-year-old was VERY good... much better than the older ones I've been with.

was this that distracting guy at work?

Psst, @tbird, I'm pretty sure the answer is yes. 

[MJ2.0]

I'm pleading the fifth.

[Miss Tequila]

Jun 15, 2015 18:23:32 GMT -5 @tbird said:

Jun 15, 2015 11:40:21 GMT -5 MJ2.0 said:

ahem, my 25-year-old was VERY good... much better than the older ones I've been with.

was this that distracting guy at work?

I thought his name was Cute New Guy?

[Miss Tequila]

Jun 15, 2015 17:26:23 GMT -5 @southernsusana said:

Jun 15, 2015 16:07:41 GMT -5 Opti said:

Bless your heart, for your opinion.

Why is it some women can look for older men, and its about financial security and if its the reverse its something about mommy or worse?   It probably has roots in finances, or, that is my fear. No bubble bursting needed. I'm less impressed by my car than most people."If you are twice his age . . . 2 x 15 is 30 and illegal."

WTE? I'm 55, last I checked anyone over 18 is legal in all US states. My personal limit I set many years ago is 23. Unfortunately in 2010, 50-24 is 26 was OK. Was over 23. Didn't happen in the end, as I think it freaked both of us out, to seriously be attracted to each other.

I started the thread because while I might be OK with a temporary relationship, I am not interested or fishing for one night stands. I don't like rules, but I'd prefer 5 or less up and 12 max down.

 

 Thanks for the "bless your heart."  I'm Southern so I know how to interpret it. 

You took a snippet, though, and quoted it out of context.  I never said you were interested in a 15-year-old.  I was giving examples of 2X different ages. 

For what it is worth, I think a 20-year-old girl interested in a 40-year-old man is looking for a daddy figure as well.  I'm an equal opportunity offender. 

I based my comment on the fact that most 20-somethings are in the process of launching.  Most 40-somethings have launched and landed.  So the 40-something is generally more stable. 

However, it has since been clarified that the 20-something is interested in a different type of relationship than I was thinking about.  "Light and fun" was the description.  That sounds like more like "friends with benefits" than I was thinking about.

So at 61 I am too old for this conversation.  Half my age is approximately 31.  My kids are several years older than that.

Thanks again for the blessing. 

I'm with you on this. One of my good friends from high school (a guy) just got engaged to a "girl" who was born the year we graduated high school! I can't imagine what the hell they have in common. My niece and her friends are two years older than this girl and they are miles away from me. Even just financially Im so far away from where I was at 26...just don't grt it

[andi9899]

Jun 15, 2015 20:26:44 GMT -5 Miss Tequila said:

Jun 15, 2015 17:26:23 GMT -5 @southernsusana said:

 Thanks for the "bless your heart."  I'm Southern so I know how to interpret it. 

You took a snippet, though, and quoted it out of context.  I never said you were interested in a 15-year-old.  I was giving examples of 2X different ages. 

For what it is worth, I think a 20-year-old girl interested in a 40-year-old man is looking for a daddy figure as well.  I'm an equal opportunity offender. 

I based my comment on the fact that most 20-somethings are in the process of launching.  Most 40-somethings have launched and landed.  So the 40-something is generally more stable. 

However, it has since been clarified that the 20-something is interested in a different type of relationship than I was thinking about.  "Light and fun" was the description.  That sounds like more like "friends with benefits" than I was thinking about.

So at 61 I am too old for this conversation.  Half my age is approximately 31.  My kids are several years older than that.

Thanks again for the blessing. 

I'm with you on this. One of my good friends from high school (a guy) just got engaged to a "girl" who was born the year we graduated high school! I can't imagine what the hell they have in common. My niece and her friends are two years older than this girl and they are miles away from me. Even just financially Im so far away from where I was at 26...just don't grt it

When I got with Old Dude, he was 49 to my 29. We had a ton in common. I am an old soul. We would probably still be together if he wasn't convinced that I was going to leave him for a younger man. I really did love him. I just got tired of trying to convince someone that he was it for me and that I wasn't interested in anyone else. He was tired of being paranoid that I was looking at every younger man that crossed my path. In the end I told him to remember that I never asked him to leave but I wasn't going to beg him to stay.

[joemilitary]

The most important question / factor still has not been addresses.......does Opti "put out"? :-)

[973beachbum]

Jun 16, 2015 2:47:48 GMT -5 joemilitary said:

The most important question / factor still has not been addresses.......does Opti "put out"? :-)

Don't assume that just because she is over 50 she isn't thinking the same question about them.

[nutty]

I am so not interested in anyone in their twenties, there are a few in their early thirties I know that are yummy but even that is too young for me.

[Opti]

Jun 16, 2015 8:39:53 GMT -5 nutty said:

I am so not interested in anyone in their twenties, there are a few in their early thirties I know that are yummy but even that is too young for me.

Well you are a young lady too.  I think you are somewhere in your 40s correct? I've changed my mind on age after 43 due to life experiences and my own umm interests. FWIW, I'm not interested in most younger men. But I have become open to dating the very interesting, attractive, intelligent ones.

I like to think part of it is my sexual magnetism, and it may be. I just hope its not all about the big chest or T&A.   The guy that was half my age did some amazing cool things, at least to me, and we had great conversations. He went to college in Canada, advocated for political change residentially I think, and got published in the paper over it. I wish I could remember one of my favorite conversations we had, it involved me finding out there was such a thing as a perfect rectangle, I think, at least according to Greek/Roman/??

standards.

(OT, but I need to write it. Just found out a patient has been re-admitted to the facility, which means my least favorite visitor ever, will be coming regularly. Because apparently, a little old woman screaming and swearing most of the time I work is not enough.  And our Alzheimer's escapee is getting more agitated and destructive. Happy, happy, joy joy. )

[Opti]

Jun 15, 2015 16:09:47 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

No. I'm in KC. Sorry.

Oh well, maybe you can take a video and post it on You Tube for me and others.

[andi9899]

Jun 16, 2015 9:05:52 GMT -5 Opti said:

Jun 15, 2015 16:09:47 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

No. I'm in KC. Sorry.

Oh well, maybe you can take a video and post it on You Tube for me and others.

And let everyone know my secrets! No way!

[beergut]

Jun 15, 2015 22:32:54 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Jun 15, 2015 20:26:44 GMT -5 Miss Tequila said:

I'm with you on this. One of my good friends from high school (a guy) just got engaged to a "girl" who was born the year we graduated high school! I can't imagine what the hell they have in common. My niece and her friends are two years older than this girl and they are miles away from me. Even just financially Im so far away from where I was at 26...just don't grt it

When I got with Old Dude, he was 49 to my 29. We had a ton in common. I am an old soul. We would probably still be together if he wasn't convinced that I was going to leave him for a younger man. I really did love him. I just got tired of trying to convince someone that he was it for me and that I wasn't interested in anyone else. He was tired of being paranoid that I was looking at every younger man that crossed my path. In the end I told him to remember that I never asked him to leave but I wasn't going to beg him to stay.

Just have to point out that this is a perfect line to a country song.

[beergut]

 
 Generally, the reason most 20-something men are interesting in 40 year old women is because 40 yr old women are much more mentally mature than the 20-something females they deal with every day. 40 yr old women know what they want out of life, while 20-something women are still trying to figure it out. 

When I was in my 20s, I liked women in their 30s. One of the things I noticed about 30+ yr old women was that, in general, they didn't mess around, they knew what they were looking for. They were fun, without the drama of a 20-something. 

Now I'm in my 30s and my GF is in her 40s. 

In general, my experience has been that older women are more fun, and are up for anything.   

[andi9899]

Jun 16, 2015 12:23:12 GMT -5 beergut said:

Jun 15, 2015 22:32:54 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

When I got with Old Dude, he was 49 to my 29. We had a ton in common. I am an old soul. We would probably still be together if he wasn't convinced that I was going to leave him for a younger man. I really did love him. I just got tired of trying to convince someone that he was it for me and that I wasn't interested in anyone else. He was tired of being paranoid that I was looking at every younger man that crossed my path. In the end I told him to remember that I never asked him to leave but I wasn't going to beg him to stay.

Just have to point out that this is a perfect line to a country song.

Is it actually a line in a country song? I'm a song writer and didn't even know it!

[beergut]

Jun 16, 2015 12:55:23 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

Jun 16, 2015 12:23:12 GMT -5 beergut said:

Just have to point out that this is a perfect line to a country song.

Is it actually a line in a country song? I'm a song writer and didn't even know it!

Not that I know of.

It should be 

[Deleted]

Men in their late 20's ask me out. Not all the time, but often enough that it's surprising to me. Around the time that I turned 40, I started attracting men in their 20's, more than I did when I was in my 30's.

Until a few years ago, I was always attracted to men a few years older than me. Now I am attracted to men a little younger than me but not 20-something young.

A man with the wisdom that usually comes with age, and some of the vitality of youth, would suit me just fine.

[Deleted]

Opti why not get some business cards (like from VistaPrint) for cheap with your name & phone # on them. You can give those to the young guys you are chatting up. If they are interested, they will call you and invite you out. 

Have you always felt you had this sexual magnitism, or is it a new thing you are thinking about? 

I have one girl friend that has a highly charismatic personality, is tiny/petite and regularly gets hit on and propositioned by 20-somethings even though she is 50.  They are very direct & unmistakable in their approach. I don't think having that level of charisma is present in most of the population. She's in the personality 1%er group!

[beergut]

 And btw, if I was single, I'm pretty sure I would date at least three of the women on this thread, including the OP, just from reading what you've written here and elsewhere. Several of your are funny and intelligent, which is a terrific combination regardless of looks. 

Soooo....if a guy isn't interested, his loss. 

Keep on truckin'