Lizard Queen
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Jun 8, 2015 11:08:38 GMT -5
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Post by Lizard Queen on Jun 8, 2015 11:08:38 GMT -5
I understand that whole varying expectations/standards thing, but if she gives you a task (vacuum, sweep/mop floor) can't you just do that and be supportive? Only if she will mow the lawn when given that task. The lawn /= all interior chores. I should know, because when I was a teen I chose mowing the lawn 1x week for an hour over cooking and cleaning in the house for hours every single day. (We had no dishwasher and even daily dishes took over an hour every day.)
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MJ2.0
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Jun 8, 2015 11:48:58 GMT -5
Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 11:48:58 GMT -5
Only if she will mow the lawn when given that task. The lawn /= all interior chores. I should know, because when I was a teen I chose mowing the lawn 1x week for an hour over cooking and cleaning in the house for hours every single day. (We had no dishwasher and even daily dishes took over an hour every day.) yup, X and I had that conversation many a time. I said I'd take care of the inside, and he'd take care of the outside. So guess what happened? Me: cooking almost daily, cleaning once a week every (other) week Him: letting our yard turn into an Amazon jungle
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 11:51:25 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 11:51:25 GMT -5
The lawn /= all interior chores. I should know, because when I was a teen I chose mowing the lawn 1x week for an hour over cooking and cleaning in the house for hours every single day. (We had no dishwasher and even daily dishes took over an hour every day.) yup, X and I had that conversation many a time. I said I'd take care of the inside, and he'd take care of the outside. So guess what happened? Me: cooking almost daily, cleaning once a week every (other) week Him: letting our yard turn into an Amazon jungle Men are pigs.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:03:54 GMT -5
if only they were as useful as pigs. X is finally taking care of the outside, and it only took us getting a divorce and trying to get me off the deed. And he has the nerve to try and get me to notice the stuff he's done. Sometimes I'm really surprised that I let him live this long.
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weltschmerz
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Jun 8, 2015 12:04:58 GMT -5
Post by weltschmerz on Jun 8, 2015 12:04:58 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things?
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 12:21:38 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 12:21:38 GMT -5
The lawn /= all interior chores. I should know, because when I was a teen I chose mowing the lawn 1x week for an hour over cooking and cleaning in the house for hours every single day. (We had no dishwasher and even daily dishes took over an hour every day.) yup, X and I had that conversation many a time. I said I'd take care of the inside, and he'd take care of the outside. So guess what happened? Me: cooking almost daily, cleaning once a week every (other) week Him: letting our yard turn into an Amazon jungle I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it.
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MJ2.0
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Jun 8, 2015 12:23:58 GMT -5
Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:23:58 GMT -5
yup, X and I had that conversation many a time. I said I'd take care of the inside, and he'd take care of the outside. So guess what happened? Me: cooking almost daily, cleaning once a week every (other) week Him: letting our yard turn into an Amazon jungle I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it. he's got the magic D.
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 12:24:50 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 12:24:50 GMT -5
I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it. he's got the magic D. Maybe, but I don't think so.
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MJ2.0
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Jun 8, 2015 12:25:36 GMT -5
Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:25:36 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things? lots of stuff has fecal matter on it, like toothbrushes. And if toothbrushes have it, certainly beards (especially long ones) would have it.
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justme
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Post by justme on Jun 8, 2015 12:25:37 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things? Yup this enforces my I like beards in theory but not practice stance. Ew.
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 12:26:12 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 12:26:12 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things? I have already said that I do much grosser things with my wife than share a shower poof.
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andi9899
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Jun 8, 2015 12:28:24 GMT -5
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Post by andi9899 on Jun 8, 2015 12:28:24 GMT -5
Baby Daddy felt that since he cut the grass, he was entitled to sit around and not do anything else. So I got to work full time (he did too) and take care of the girls, clean, cook, help with home improvement projects,and go to school at night. Oh,and I was expected to want to have sex with him almost every day. I'm so glad he's someone else's problem now.
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MJ2.0
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Jun 8, 2015 12:29:53 GMT -5
Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:29:53 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things? I have already said that I do much grosser things with my wife than share a shower poof. yeah I thought about that too. Not you and your wife specifically, but that certain acts might lead to fecal matter in beards. I don't really like beards anyway. Too scratchy.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:32:06 GMT -5
he's got the magic D. Maybe, but I don't think so. why, have you tried it? and Andi brings up a good point - you're hearing it from the husband's POV which sounds sort of positive. Would his wife put the same spin on it?
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 12:34:29 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 12:34:29 GMT -5
Maybe, but I don't think so. why, have you tried it? and Andi brings up a good point - you're hearing it from the husband's POV which sounds sort of positive. Would his wife put the same spin on it? Just the feeling that I get. And I don't know if the wife would put the same spin on it. maybe she is getting ready to divorce him. Who knows.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Jun 8, 2015 12:39:58 GMT -5
Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 8, 2015 12:39:58 GMT -5
why, have you tried it? and Andi brings up a good point - you're hearing it from the husband's POV which sounds sort of positive. Would his wife put the same spin on it? Just the feeling that I get. And I don't know if the wife would put the same spin on it. maybe she is getting ready to divorce him. Who knows. well, your wife might have a clue, if you guys double date.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 12:52:46 GMT -5
Just the feeling that I get. And I don't know if the wife would put the same spin on it. maybe she is getting ready to divorce him. Who knows. well, your wife might have a clue, if you guys double date. what Wisconsin Beth is saying is that you should get the scoop on this couple, because if we find out that there is a woman who happily does 95% of the work in a family situation we will have no choice but to take her out.
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Deleted
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Jun 8, 2015 13:01:12 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2015 13:01:12 GMT -5
They recently did a study here where, they cut beard hair off to see what was lurking in there. Besides the regular bacteria, there was fecal matter in all of them. Lots of fecal matter. What the hell are you guys doing with those things? Thanks welts, now I'm gonna get sick every time I LOOK at someone with a beard!!!
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Jun 8, 2015 13:50:08 GMT -5
Don't know how many have responded yet to this but I'll bite. Now for a chick I consider myself to be pretty, umm, not so emotional. I don't cry at weddings and didn't go through that embarrassing crush phase in HS (thank God!!!!) So I totally can't understand why dudes allow themselves to get so friggin angry/upset/furious when watching a sporting event. I mean you're watching it for enjoyment, right? To relax, unwind, chill out? So what if a ref makes a bad call, is it really worth getting yourself so worked up over that your face is beet red and the veins are popping in your neck? (and I'm clutching my cell phone in case I need to dial 911 to have you resuscitated)
This phenomenon has been observed, regardless of the sport involved, in numerous test subjects. I actually witnessed a guy tear off his team's shirt during a superbowl party and rip it to shreds. Sadly, there was no upside to the performance. Yea, I've seen women get worked up but they are nowhere near as emotionally invested as the guys I know. I just don't get it. Guilty.
except, DW is as much of an intense fan as I am, so it works out on that front..
Cap'n, i think that's the first incompatibility I've seen between us!
Ohhhh! Now I want to see this in action. Get a few hard root beers in ya, gather you and your DW in a room with DH and our best friend, and I can sit back with my bestie and take bets on who will be the first to hyperventilate themselves into unconsciousness! My friend and I have a drinking game around this. We bet on who will be the first to: 1. Swear - take one swig 2. Yell at a ref - take two swigs 3. Scream at a player - take three swigs 4. Jump up in absolute frustration - take four swigs... Fortunatly our SO's are remarkably matched in temperment so we both get nice and toasty around the same time . It would be nice for it to be a REAL game for a change.
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happyhoix
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Jun 8, 2015 13:51:13 GMT -5
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Post by happyhoix on Jun 8, 2015 13:51:13 GMT -5
yup, X and I had that conversation many a time. I said I'd take care of the inside, and he'd take care of the outside. So guess what happened? Me: cooking almost daily, cleaning once a week every (other) week Him: letting our yard turn into an Amazon jungle I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it. I do. He makes her toes curl.
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ArchietheDragon
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Jun 8, 2015 13:52:04 GMT -5
Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 13:52:04 GMT -5
I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it. I do. He makes her toes curl. Anything is possible.
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happyhoix
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Jun 8, 2015 14:00:23 GMT -5
Post by happyhoix on Jun 8, 2015 14:00:23 GMT -5
I don't understand how people do this. I really don't. can we get real for a minute...
OK, so i TOTALLY get how that person probably feels, but what if the guy, and his friends, DIDN'T CARE if it was decorated?
I get stuff like this sometimes where DW is cracking the whip and getting all stressed out and i'm like, d00d, we don't even ened to do that, that's your internal expectation, not mine, and not the people coming over.
Be honest, when you walk into a couple's house and they are really slovenly - dirty dishes everywhere, floors are sticky with spilled crap, really funky smells, pails full of dirty diapers - do you think 'man the guy who lives here is a pig' or do you think 'man the woman who lives here is a pig.' IMHO, the state of the house gets reflected back on the woman, which is not fair, but that's how it is. So I admit that I want the house cleaner than DH does, when we have family coming over, because I know MIL and SIL, although very sweet people, will not fail to notice the cat odors coming from the litter box or the spills, cat hair and dirt left on the hardwoods. I think the same is true if a family seems to be really struggling financially, that seems to reflect back more on the husband, not the wife, which is equally unfair, since it might be the bad habits of the wife that are making them poor.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Jun 8, 2015 14:03:50 GMT -5
can we get real for a minute...
OK, so i TOTALLY get how that person probably feels, but what if the guy, and his friends, DIDN'T CARE if it was decorated?
I get stuff like this sometimes where DW is cracking the whip and getting all stressed out and i'm like, d00d, we don't even ened to do that, that's your internal expectation, not mine, and not the people coming over.
Be honest, when you walk into a couple's house and they are really slovenly - dirty dishes everywhere, floors are sticky with spilled crap, really funky smells, pails full of dirty diapers - do you think 'man the guy who lives here is a pig' or do you think 'man the woman who lives here is a pig.' IMHO, the state of the house gets reflected back on the woman I think that is mostly true. Same, though, that if the outside looks terrible people assume the guy is not taking care of business.
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Deleted
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Jun 8, 2015 14:47:59 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2015 14:47:59 GMT -5
Be honest, when you walk into a couple's house and they are really slovenly - dirty dishes everywhere, floors are sticky with spilled crap, really funky smells, pails full of dirty diapers - do you think 'man the guy who lives here is a pig' or do you think 'man the woman who lives here is a pig.' IMHO, the state of the house gets reflected back on the woman I think that is mostly true. Same, though, that if the outside looks terrible people assume the guy is not taking care of business. At least in my neighborhood the neighbors know the jungle is my fault since they all know DH can't walk on his own. Family knows the house looking like a sty is my fault too since I work overnight and sleep during the day. DH can't use the vacuum, he tried and fell over, or do laundry since the machines are in the basement and he cannot use the stairs on his own, so the only thing he can do is wash dishes. That is only because he can sit down at the sink. Everything else is on me. That would be why we moved to a smaller house. I will admit that at least our families will help us with things around the house when we ask. It helps to have the gimp. They do it for him. That and their mother makes them.
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happyhoix
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Jun 8, 2015 16:04:36 GMT -5
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Post by happyhoix on Jun 8, 2015 16:04:36 GMT -5
I think that is mostly true. Same, though, that if the outside looks terrible people assume the guy is not taking care of business. At least in my neighborhood the neighbors know the jungle is my fault since they all know DH can't walk on his own. Family knows the house looking like a sty is my fault too since I work overnight and sleep during the day. DH can't use the vacuum, he tried and fell over, or do laundry since the machines are in the basement and he cannot use the stairs on his own, so the only thing he can do is wash dishes. That is only because he can sit down at the sink. Everything else is on me. That would be why we moved to a smaller house. I will admit that at least our families will help us with things around the house when we ask. It helps to have the gimp. They do it for him. That and their mother makes them. You definitely have special circumstances and I'm glad your family is helping out!!
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Jun 8, 2015 16:40:00 GMT -5
I have a friend that lucked out with a wife. I don't how he does it. As far as I can tell he mows the lawn. She cooks, cleans, does all home maintenance (including sheetrocking, laying new floor, etc), takes care of the kids, works full time and makes more money than he does. He has time to play in a softball league, basketball league, play video games and home brew beer with another buddy. Don't know how he does it. I do. He makes her toes curl. People say stuff like this all the time and I'm wondering: does anyone really think this is true? Are you (generic you) willing to be someone's unpaid house servant because they throw you some richard? I do not buy into this at all. My sweetie brings home very filling *Thai food* a minimum of 3 times a week, and I still get annoyed if he's sitting on his tushie all weekend while I do everything around the house.
Besides, if getting penis means that she's willing to do everything else around the house, what is he doing in return for getting vagina? Or is the presumption that one person in the scenario sucks so bad at sex that the other person is doing them a real favor?
ETA: hahahahahaha I did not say Richard. Proboards is such a prude.
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midjd
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Jun 8, 2015 17:00:03 GMT -5
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Post by midjd on Jun 8, 2015 17:00:03 GMT -5
I do. He makes her toes curl. People say stuff like this all the time and I'm wondering: does anyone really think this is true? Are you (generic you) willing to be someone's unpaid house servant because they throw you some richard? I do not buy into this at all. My sweetie brings home very filling *Thai food* a minimum of 3 times a week, and I still get annoyed if he's sitting on his tushie all weekend while I do everything around the house.
Besides, if getting penis means that she's willing to do everything else around the house, what is he doing in return for getting vagina? Or is the presumption that one person in the scenario sucks so bad at sex that the other person is doing them a real favor?
ETA: hahahahahaha I did not say Richard. Proboards is such a prude.
I couldn't agree more. I have a friend who has a really worthless, douchebag husband who essentially does nothing but create problems for her and watch her take care of his bratty kid. Whenever someone comments on the situation, they say that he must be good in bed. I can't imagine any *Thai food* that would make up for having to put up with him the other 23 1/2 hours per day (and I'm being generous here).
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 17:59:41 GMT -5
I joke about that being the case largely because I can't see any other reason. It could be like my ex-SIL and her DH - she doesn't want to raise her kids as a single parent (even though IMO that would be better than seeing their mom put up with a worthless husband). Or she loves him that much that she'll tolerate it. Or she likes it - in which case she must be exterminated.
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Jun 8, 2015 18:11:34 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jun 8, 2015 18:11:34 GMT -5
MJ how old are you again?
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jun 8, 2015 18:21:35 GMT -5
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