Does any one know where (insert member) went?

[moon/Laura]

How is that an attack, Chloe? I made an honest statement of how I felt - like we were being accused of looking for reasons to ban. If mine is an attack, then what Lena said must be too.

No? Well neither was mine.

[Jaguar]

Mar 19, 2016 21:55:01 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Yes, you have told me that, Lena. But that specific statement did feel (to me) like we're all bad cops, so to speak.

I get that people do get concerned. I guess I just don't like all of the negative guessing that tends to go on in addition to that concern - like in one recent case, the accusation that we banned someone.

And if i disappeared one day, I doubt few would notice outside of family and maybe a couple of people I talk to regularly. Or, if they did, they may well rejoice...dance around and sing "ding dong the witch is dead..."

Moon I would never rejoice over you or anyone else disappearing.

[whoisjohngalt]

Mar 19, 2016 21:55:01 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Yes, you have told me that, Lena. But that specific statement did feel (to me) like we're all bad cops, so to speak.

I get that people do get concerned. I guess I just don't like all of the negative guessing that tends to go on in addition to that concern - like in one recent case, the accusation that we banned someone.

And if i disappeared one day, I doubt few would notice outside of family and maybe a couple of people I talk to regularly. Or, if they did, they may well rejoice...dance around and sing "ding dong the witch is dead..."

I completely understand and appreciate that you don't want negative guessing - I agree that it's not very kind to be talking behind people's back.

But then what is the solution?

And as far as your disappearance - up until recently *I* never saw you posting on any of the threads that I was reading.  For awhile there I didn't even know who you were!   But I know quite a few people are friends with you IRL from here, so it would be noticed.

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Mar 19, 2016 21:59:19 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

How is that an attack, Chloe? I made an honest statement of how I felt - like we were being accused of looking for reasons to ban. If mine is an attack, then what Lena said must be too.

No? Well neither was mine.

Wow. I'll choose not to engage with someone who is so incredibly upset about something that rational conversation cannot exist. I'm sorry you're having such a bad day, week, month, whatever. I hope you feel better soon. 

[moon/Laura]

Rational discussion can exist. But don't you even get why I was upset about it? It was the implication that mods only want to ban people. And if that's what people think then yes, I have to question my sanity in taking this on. Because who wants to be hated simply because of some internet title?

PS, the fact that I (unavoidably) killed a rabbit on the way to work yesterday had nothing to do with my feelings about this. I could have won a million bucks and still had the same reaction.

[moon/Laura]

Mar 19, 2016 22:04:00 GMT -5 whoisjohngalt said:

Mar 19, 2016 21:55:01 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Yes, you have told me that, Lena. But that specific statement did feel (to me) like we're all bad cops, so to speak.

I get that people do get concerned. I guess I just don't like all of the negative guessing that tends to go on in addition to that concern - like in one recent case, the accusation that we banned someone.

And if i disappeared one day, I doubt few would notice outside of family and maybe a couple of people I talk to regularly. Or, if they did, they may well rejoice...dance around and sing "ding dong the witch is dead..."

I completely understand and appreciate that you don't want negative guessing - I agree that it's not very kind to be talking behind people's back.

But then what is the solution?

And as far as your disappearance - up until recently *I* never saw you posting on any of the threads that I was reading.  For awhile there I didn't even know who you were!   But I know quite a few people are friends with you IRL from here, so it would be noticed.

I don't really know what the solution is, to be honest. and that's what makes being an admin hard. It's impossible to satifsy everyone. Of course, real life is that way too..

I know I don't post a lot, not anymore especially. I posted more in the beginning, before the blush wore off. But then, I would be more in EE, or lifestyles. Now that we're on v5 and recent topics shows threads from all boards, you might see me elsewhere. I post to interesting topics, not just on one board where I feel comfortable, like some do. I'm not saying that's bad, per se. But it's turned YM into a mini- EE, which I really didn't want. Anyway, I post much less overall nowadays because I don't find it fun anymore. And I also think maybe people are happier if I just watch from a distance. I don't know. I never created the place because I wanted it, really. I made it because I knew that others would miss the interactions and friendships they'd developed on MSN and I had the ability to do something about it.

[ken a.k.a OMK]

Moon gave many of us a board to continue our friendships when msn abruptly got out of the business. Thank you.

[Deleted]

Honestly, if there is someone here who you would miss being in contact with, I would make oabd keep out of board contact with them.

[whoisjohngalt]

Mar 20, 2016 10:18:03 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Mar 19, 2016 22:04:00 GMT -5 whoisjohngalt said:

I completely understand and appreciate that you don't want negative guessing - I agree that it's not very kind to be talking behind people's back.

But then what is the solution?

And as far as your disappearance - up until recently *I* never saw you posting on any of the threads that I was reading.  For awhile there I didn't even know who you were!   But I know quite a few people are friends with you IRL from here, so it would be noticed.

I don't really know what the solution is, to be honest. and that's what makes being an admin hard. It's impossible to satifsy everyone. Of course, real life is that way too..

I know I don't post a lot, not anymore especially. I posted more in the beginning, before the blush wore off. But then, I would be more in EE, or lifestyles. Now that we're on v5 and recent topics shows threads from all boards, you might see me elsewhere. I post to interesting topics, not just on one board where I feel comfortable, like some do. I'm not saying that's bad, per se. But it's turned YM into a mini- EE, which I really didn't want. Anyway, I post much less overall nowadays because I don't find it fun anymore. And I also think maybe people are happier if I just watch from a distance. I don't know. I never created the place because I wanted it, really. I made it because I knew that others would miss the interactions and friendships they'd developed on MSN and I had the ability to do something about it.

I would like to see you post - up until recently you were that mystical figure to me bc I had noooo clue who you were

[moon/Laura]

Well then, I will consider it. I'm really nothing special LOL. Just like any of you. I'm human being who gets upset and angry at times. I have a sense of humor, although it may be "off" and/or sarcastic periodically. And, contrary to semi popular belief, I do actually have a heart.

[whoisjohngalt]

Mar 20, 2016 12:04:50 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Well then, I will consider it. I'm really nothing special LOL. Just like any of you. I'm human being who gets upset and angry at times. I have a sense of humor, although it may be "off" and/or sarcastic periodically. And, contrary to semi popular belief, I do actually have a heart.

You can start by joining a "my spouse' reaction to my OT" thread.  I can see that thread getting very fascinating

[moon/Laura]

Ok. I will check it out, although it may not be for hours. I'm visiting my mom right now in the rehab facility she's been in since she broke her hip in January. After that, my bro and I are working at her house for a few hours. We're doing a mini remodel while she's out - new carpet and paint, new tile in the kitchen and master bath, new vanity and toilet in master bath. We have a month left to get it all done. My mom was a lifelong smoker so all walls and ceilings have to be washed. Very time consuming. Some of the subfloor had to be replaced as well due to cat urine smell. So, between work and this stuff, I don't have a ton of free time right now, lol.

[debthaven]

Sarah, Rukh decided to leave. 

[tcu2003]

Mar 19, 2016 15:43:58 GMT -5 oped said:

Later left once before and I chased her down in Facebook and told her she should come back. I am not so inclined to repeat that process at this point, but if someone else wants to...

She popped up on another message board I'm on. She's alive and well - it didn't sound like she'll be back here, but you never know.

[Value Buy]

Mar 20, 2016 9:04:55 GMT -5 moon/Laura said:

Rational discussion can exist. But don't you even get why I was upset about it? It was the implication that mods only want to ban people. And if that's what people think then yes, I have to question my sanity in taking this on. Because who wants to be hated simply because of some internet title?

PS, the fact that I (unavoidably) killed a rabbit on the way to work yesterday had nothing to do with my feelings about this. I could have won a million bucks and still had the same reaction.

That rabbit you killed.........sure it was not a jackelope?
Or is that just a Dakota and Wyoming thing?

[moon/Laura]

Well I'm not that far from Wyoming, really. Under an hour's drive. But I saw no antlers, so I'm pretty sure it was just a garden variety bunny.

They, and prairie dogs, are all over up here. In the spring, the road around our facility becomes a mess.

[Works4me]

I can completely understand why Rukh and others have chosen to leave - I support them in it but it makes me sad and I miss them greatly. 

Here is a toast to all of us - 

[hurley1980]

Jul 21, 2015 18:49:32 GMT -5 @pinkcshmere said:

Where's hurley1980 ? I've wondered sometimes how she's been doing after her split with her husband.

Awww, thanks for thinking of me! I'm doing fantastic. Haven't logged in here in a while, but I still lurk around sometimes.

[Ombud]

Mar 23, 2016 0:13:45 GMT -5 Works4me said:

I can completely understand why Rukh and others have chosen to leave - I support them in it but it makes me sad and I miss them greatly. 

Here is a toast to all of us - 

I understand too. I contemplated leaving after another poster (who has since left instead) stated I was psychotic and off my meds (her words not mine) for venting about my job difficulties. Fortunately moderator deleted the locked thread and I vowed to watch where I vent -- thought it was better venting here that at work, still think it is supposed to be but will watch myself

[Works4me]

Ombud - I remember that commen and felt like someone needed slapping. BTW, still working there with all the boxes that are supposed to be used as a table? That was one of the kookier things I have ver heard of.

[whoisjohngalt]

Rukh left??  As her posts show zero??  When did that happen?

[Deleted]

Dezi has been gone from the politics board for a long time.

 He would go away and come back sometimes but it seems like forever since he's been here now. Hope he's ok.

[Green Eyed Lady]

Sometimes, I think people leave just because they have other things they need to be doing.   Or maybe because they are aggravated over something and don't feel it's worth it. I know we'll get a bunch of people saying that it's just a message board and they never get angry or aggravated or upset over something said here. I'll call BS in advance cause I'm not buying it.

I know that, in my life, if I'm feeling particularly stressed and I can alleviate some of the reasons I'm stressed, I do.  For example, I set my cruise control at the speed limit.  I found I was getting stressed watching out for police while I was barreling down the highway.  Set cruise = that particular stressor is gone!  Maybe leaving here for awhile does the same for someone else.

Maybe some people feel they are spending too much time here.  It can sure be addictive!  Perhaps they leave so they can spend some time on other things.  Sometimes, they come back.

I think it's nice that people who post here regularly are missed and I think it's nice that people ask about them.  There are some occasions where it's obvious a person left because of conflict here.  That doesn't equate to being banned each time.  It may have been their own decision and I also think it's nice that administration doesn't violate their privacy by confirming one way or the other. 

[Ombud]

Mar 24, 2016 22:52:11 GMT -5 Works4me said:

Ombud - I remember that commen and felt like someone needed slapping. BTW, still working there with all the boxes that are supposed to be used as a table? That was one of the kookier things I have ver heard of.

Yes still there. I now have a locked file cabinet to use as a table (buts into desk to create an L) so my terminal cannot be shut off -- goes into hibernation instead.

Everywhere else (ex one that just wanted nights & weekends) weren't hiring.

I don't want to be misunderstood. I worked as an ombudsman for county health patients for a very long time. It's sad when pts have difficulty getting assistance but just bc someone has a nightmare of a work situation or is experiencing harassment doesn't mean they have a MH concern.

[Green Eyed Lady]

I wanted to add to my above post but forgot...

I also think it's unreasonable to expect that a person that was here won't ever be mentioned or asked about. When President Obama is no longer president, he will still be talked about. When we decide to post on a public message board, we become a public persona. We don't get to expect that we are suddenly invisible once we leave. I don't see it as gossip or in any way intrusive to ask about someone who leaves.    However, openly speculating on the reasons isn't necessary and I agree with the mods in that respect. People can come to conclusions that are harmful to others, even when those conclusions could be completely wrong conclusions.

Example: I may decide to leave tomorrow after a long battle between others posters and mods about something that I thought was wrong. Yes, I could have been banned and it may look like it from the warnings I get from the mods. It could also be I just decided FU and left on my own.  Attributing my absence to the mods may be right - it might be wrong. But since we (or at least I) expect them to not say one way or the other, it's unfair to speculate and arrive at a decision from that speculation. It may be the wrong one and suddenly, the mods suck and are unfair.

[dannylion]

Mar 13, 2016 21:53:51 GMT -5 saveinla said:

Has anyone seen dannylion? Hope she is ok.

Aw, thanks for thinking of me kindly.

So it seems I'm part of a trend. I did take a break for a while. I didn't understand the level of hostility directed at me after I suggested that sewing is a useful skill. Such a small, insignificant thing to generate so much meanness.  Still don't understand it or why some of it felt like contempt.  I generally have a pretty thick skin, but I am still baffled by the naked hostility directed at someone who is just basically harmless and nonthreatening. Anyway, it seemed like a good idea to step away for a while. 

Then at about the same time, I got an offer I couldn't refuse.  Apparently, this old Cold Warrior still has something useful to offer, and I am no longer entirely retired, at least for the duration of the project.  So I now have less time to spend dawdling on the internet. 

I did miss the nice people and hope everyone is doing well.  I need to catch up on what has been going on (and probably should learn how to employ the "ignore" button).

[Green Eyed Lady]

Oh dear. I sew. A lot. It's saved me countless dollars and aggravation over the years.  I guess I'm just a horrible person.  I missed that conversation....thankfully.  Or at least I think I did.  I guess I should say I don't remember it.

[dannylion]

Mar 25, 2016 11:46:49 GMT -5 Green Eyed Lady said:

Oh dear. I sew. A lot. It's saved me countless dollars and aggravation over the years.  I guess I'm just a horrible person.  I missed that conversation....thankfully.  Or at least I think I did.  I guess I should say I don't remember it.

Yeah, it was weird.  It seemed so out of proportion, but I don't have the best social skills, so maybe I "just didn't understand."  Anyway, I've decided it's probably best just to consider it a learning experience (mainly of who to avoid) and move on. 

[Green Eyed Lady]

Agreed. It's difficult to ascertain true meaning from only the written word. I've been known to overreact on occasion. I admire people who can admit that also. Then again....maybe not. Perhaps some people were truly offended by your sewing prowess!   Sometimes, I'm offended by things others can't understand so I have to consider others may be offended by something I can't understand. 

At the risk of angering someone, I also like collecting antique sewing tools/accessories.  I love my treadle sewing machine.  Flame away. 

[dannylion]

I love looking at antique sewing stuff! I have my grandmother's chair-side sewing-kit-on-a-stand and her Singer Featherlite machine. I know she had a treadle machine when I was very small, but I have no idea what happened to it. You're so lucky; you can sew even when the power is out!