Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2015 20:07:39 GMT -5
My oldest "child" is now almost 38, but back in the Dark Ages, the obs didn't even let us drive for six weeks. My then-DH had to take off work to take me and the baby to her wellness visit, and then he had to take off from work to take me to my six-weeks check-up. I think my generation was told that you could hurt something internally if you drove before everything healed.
I don't know your gender, Captain, or if you have had a child, but there is a lot more to recovering from childbirth than whether you can get out of the bed or not. Even with a vaginal birth, there are stitches, etc. that HURT for several weeks when you sit down for long periods. Your hormones are again out of whack. Of course, again my experience is dated.
But I think all recovery periods err on the side of caution. I had foot surgery, and the doctor made me stay off my foot for a week. I could walk just fine after a few days, but he told me not to even think about going back to my retail job yet. I wouldn't walk quite so fine if I stood on it for eight hours.
You are judging based on how people feel when they aren't working and are having time to rest, recuperate. To make your case, you need to post some results from people who went back to work the week after having that baby.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Jan 29, 2015 21:03:19 GMT -5
I'm having surgery next week. I'm completely burned out from working insane hours for the last several months. My doctor told me I need to be out 2 1/2 weeks and gave me a letter stating this. I'm a tough person and have powered through many illnesses to meet deadlines. In this case, I'm taking the full amount of recovery time. IKnowing me, I could go back early but Im not. I plan to use this time to recharge before I get so fed up that I pull a dark. The surgery came out a convenient time! And no, I don't feel guilty for being out. Did you slip the Dr. $100? Lol! I would have wanted a month off for that!
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gooddecisions
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Post by gooddecisions on Jan 29, 2015 22:55:12 GMT -5
Lying in bed with my baby all day was far less demanding than making my brain work at my desk job. And yes, sitting hurt. I birthed a 9.5 oz baby with no pain meds. I had stitches and horribly painful hemorrhoids to say the least. My brain was okay the first couple of weeks and then it turned to mush. Hormones affect people differently and mine impact my recall and ability to speak articulately. Yeah, I would have been a warm body in a seat, but that's about it. I'm so grateful that my employer/managers didn't have unrealistic expectations of postpartum recovery. I feel bad for anyone who works for somebody with the attitude of it was easy for me, so it should be easy for you and anybody it's not easy for is making it up!
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Post by Deleted on Jan 29, 2015 23:14:23 GMT -5
The hormone changes things were freaky. Waking up in a bed soaked in sweat, all my hair falling out, crying at everything...and the boobs were out of control...totally.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Jan 30, 2015 7:33:43 GMT -5
Lying in bed with my baby all day was far less demanding than making my brain work at my desk job. And yes, sitting hurt. I birthed a 9.5 oz baby with no pain meds. I had stitches and horribly painful hemorrhoids to say the least. My brain was okay the first couple of weeks and then it turned to mush. Hormones affect people differently and mine impact my recall and ability to speak articulately. Yeah, I would have been a warm body in a seat, but that's about it. I'm so grateful that my employer/managers didn't have unrealistic expectations of postpartum recovery. I feel bad for anyone who works for somebody with the attitude of it was easy for me, so it should be easy for you and anybody it's not easy for is making it up! I've never been through childbirth nor do I plan on going through it, and even I understand that childbirth recovery is not kittens and rainbows. I would hate to work for that employer as well.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Jan 30, 2015 7:50:43 GMT -5
My oldest "child" is now almost 38, but back in the Dark Ages, the obs didn't even let us drive for six weeks. My then-DH had to take off work to take me and the baby to her wellness visit, and then he had to take off from work to take me to my six-weeks check-up. I think my generation was told that you could hurt something internally if you drove before everything healed.
I don't know your gender, Captain, or if you have had a child, but there is a lot more to recovering from childbirth than whether you can get out of the bed or not. Even with a vaginal birth, there are stitches, etc. that HURT for several weeks when you sit down for long periods. Your hormones are again out of whack. Of course, again my experience is dated.
But I think all recovery periods err on the side of caution. I had foot surgery, and the doctor made me stay off my foot for a week. I could walk just fine after a few days, but he told me not to even think about going back to my retail job yet. I wouldn't walk quite so fine if I stood on it for eight hours.
You are judging based on how people feel when they aren't working and are having time to rest, recuperate. To make your case, you need to post some results from people who went back to work the week after having that baby. When I had mine they kept us in the hospital for 5 days. I almost went batshit crazy staying there and kept asking to go home Don't think they had family leave or such but then I decided to be a SAHM for a while anyway so no need for me to check on that.
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Sam_2.0
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Post by Sam_2.0 on Jan 30, 2015 8:24:14 GMT -5
Funny story - in one training class for our call center, there was a girl that was a little heavier and always wore big sweatshirts. There was no real dress code for the call center so no one cared. Missing time during training was not allowed for any reason. I was teaching class and she mentioned to me that she wasnt feeling well, that her stomach hurt. I told her that she was free to go home, but that meant her spot in this class was done and she would have to suspend her file to wait for the next training class to come around. I told her the last half of the day would be pretty light, and I could make it as easy on her as possible if she just wanted to power through. I even offered to run & get her some pepto and crackers over lunch to help her make it through the day. She declined and left at lunch time (presumably to go get food for herself). Well, she didn't come back after lunch. I kept hoping she was just tardy, but after an hour I realized she wasn't coming back. Towards the end of the day, the call center manager came to pull me aside and say that her husband had called. She'd had the baby and wanted to know if she could come back to class the next week! she completely hid the fact that she was pregnant because she was scared she wouldn't get hired, and then sat in my class all morning long IN LABOR and didn't say anything! I felt so terrible. They held a spot for her in the next class to come around, which was about 3 months later. So it wasn't a paid leave but she got to come back.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Jan 30, 2015 10:31:02 GMT -5
Lets take maternity out of this.....
Just another example of the variation of recoveries, you can look at hip replacements. The standard is 6 weeks, but for my first one I could have gone back to work in a week. I was gone 2 because I had already put in my paperwork and knew I would never get the time back if I went back to work.
My second hip was waaaaay more complicated and I was out the full 6 weeks. Same person, there was only 4 years difference in my age and I was in the same physical condition. For neither, I had no additional problems that could complicate things.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Jan 30, 2015 10:35:08 GMT -5
The Walk of the Penguin Mich, thats what some of us here are talking about. That, and Equality. Yours is not a maternity case, you were fine with one hip surgery, not with the other. Just because you "felt" fine, doesn't mean you need to go back and show what an awesome employee you are. Take the rest during recovery period. Why mess up with recovery because you cannot see any outwardly symptoms of medical issues. Sometimes there are no medical issues, but issue start IF you start doing stuff a tad too early.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Jan 30, 2015 10:45:33 GMT -5
The Walk of the Penguin Mich, thats what some of us here are talking about. That, and Equality. Yours is not a maternity case, you were fine with one hip surgery, not with the other. Just because you "felt" fine, doesn't mean you need to go back and show what an awesome employee you are. Take the rest during recovery period. Why mess up with recovery because you cannot see any outwardly symptoms of medical issues. Sometimes there are no medical issues, but issue start IF you start doing stuff a tad too early. That was my point.....the disparity of recoveries. And actually, sometimes it IS better to get back working. One of the first things that that do after hips is boot you out of bed and get you walking. It is VERY important, and helps prevent DVTs. Even if you have a sedentary job, you get up and walk around more than you would at home 'recovering'. The big issue is your type of job. I was on my feet 2 weeks are my first THR without a problem. With the second, I could have gone back easily at 3-4 weeks. However, I had it away from home and the doc was leery of me getting on a flight so soon after surgery. So that drove things a bit too.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 30, 2015 11:06:14 GMT -5
The big issue is your type of job
And I think this is part of the reason why HR has a blanket policy. Somebody in the office may be fine to come back in 2 weeks since she "sits on her ass".
I however work in a very physical environment and a biohazards one.
If the company lets Office Worker come back early what is to stop me from trying to petition to come back early? What is to stop me from suing the company saying "They let her come back, they are discriminating against me!"
I get back and complications happen. Then HR has a workmen's compensation case on its hands
HR isn't about what is "fair" for other people. They are not about the individual. They are about protecting the company.
And by mandating we all have to be out the 6 weeks the medical community they avoid all the pitfalls that come with trying to tailor the situation to every single individual.
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gooddecisions
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Post by gooddecisions on Jan 30, 2015 11:51:58 GMT -5
Funny story - in one training class for our call center, there was a girl that was a little heavier and always wore big sweatshirts. There was no real dress code for the call center so no one cared. Missing time during training was not allowed for any reason. I was teaching class and she mentioned to me that she wasnt feeling well, that her stomach hurt. I told her that she was free to go home, but that meant her spot in this class was done and she would have to suspend her file to wait for the next training class to come around. I told her the last half of the day would be pretty light, and I could make it as easy on her as possible if she just wanted to power through. I even offered to run & get her some pepto and crackers over lunch to help her make it through the day. She declined and left at lunch time (presumably to go get food for herself). Well, she didn't come back after lunch. I kept hoping she was just tardy, but after an hour I realized she wasn't coming back. Towards the end of the day, the call center manager came to pull me aside and say that her husband had called. She'd had the baby and wanted to know if she could come back to class the next week! she completely hid the fact that she was pregnant because she was scared she wouldn't get hired, and then sat in my class all morning long IN LABOR and didn't say anything! I felt so terrible. They held a spot for her in the next class to come around, which was about 3 months later. So it wasn't a paid leave but she got to come back. It's probably my hormones at it again, but this story has me in tears. It's a horrible society that makes a person feel that they need to hide pregnancy out of fear of job loss. I'm so glad she was able to keep her job. I worked through a bit of labor as well, but that was my decision and when I was finally ready to go the hospital, my boss told me "god bless." I barely made it to the hospital with only enough time to rip off my clothes and grab my ankles.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 30, 2015 11:54:59 GMT -5
I worked through a bit of labor as wellI unintentionally did this time around. I started feeling like I had to go but wasn't going and thought "Oh crap I am trying to push!" I had no clue I was as far along as I was. I figured I'd maybe be 5 cm and have a bit of a wait. Got myself across the street and checked in. Midwife said if I had waited another 15 minutes I would have been giving birth on the floor of the lab. Then I would have had ya'll beat. I would have been working WHILE giving birth! Glad I didn't though that would have been an OSHA/biohazard nightmare, I can't imagine the paperwork we would had to complete afterwards.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 30, 2015 11:59:33 GMT -5
I worked a day in labor too. I wasn't due for nearly a month and thought they were just Braxton Hicks and not feeling great It was a Friday and DH worked 5th shift at the time so he was just getting ready to leave for work when I got home. I was making dinner and my water broke, so he called in and we went to the hospital instead.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Jan 30, 2015 12:13:57 GMT -5
Hee haw all of you!! You are supposed to get up and get to work pretty quickly AFTER you give birth. Who cares that you work WHILE in labour. You are still not on STD or FMLA then, still not reaping the benefits given to you by your employer, so its all good !! But get back to work after delivery lest you use any benefits awarded to you , you suckers!!!!
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 30, 2015 12:18:14 GMT -5
I'm really bad, I work right across the street from the hospital. I had zero excuse to stay put. I should have hopped off that table and ran back to the lab immediately. I'm sure HR and OSHA would have understood.
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Jan 30, 2015 13:23:36 GMT -5
I'm really bad, I work right across the street from the hospital. I had zero excuse to stay put. I should have hopped off that table and ran back to the lab immediately. I'm sure HR and OSHA would have understood. I worked AT the hospital I delivered at.... all I had to do was take the elevator upstairs! I took 12 weeks for my CS, and then my spouse took the remaining FMLA (8 weeks?). Anybody who thinks work is harder than surgery and having a baby who doesn't sleep and nurses 24-7 needs to take a dose of empathy.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Jan 31, 2015 11:06:36 GMT -5
I took 3 weeks prior to the birth and 12 weeks after. I have nothing to prove here!
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trimatty471
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Post by trimatty471 on Feb 1, 2015 22:04:53 GMT -5
Worse than the marriage penalty is the no kids penalty. No dependant deduction. No child care deduction. No education expense/education savings deduction. What do you get? Taxes to support the schools your non-kids don't go to (30% of our property taxes). Taxes to support the parks and rec programs your non-kids don't particiapte in. Taxes to support the low income breakfast, lunch, and school break feeding programs that your non-kids won't benefit from. The expectation that you will cover the work of the parent who is at parent/teacher conferences. The expectation that you will make sure that the project with the tight deadline is completed while the parent picks up their child from day care before it closes and goes home. The expectation that you will cover the work of the parent who is at home with a sick child. The expectation that you will cover the work of the parent on maternity leave/parental bonding leave/new adoption leave. A smaller pay check so that your employer can provide a bigger medical care subsidy for employees raising families/subsidize on site child care facilities/sick child nursing programs/adoption assistance/fertility treatments, and the like. Seems like a pretty high price to pay to support the lifestyle decisions that other people make. I hear you. In addition to the federal, state, real estate taxes that you pay I have to pay local taxes to the city whereas a huge portion goes toward the pension funds of our civic employees. Our schools are crap and infrastructure needs updating.
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