Abby Normal
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Post by Abby Normal on Nov 7, 2014 11:16:02 GMT -5
Yes, you can buy household stuff especially if it's stuff she wouldn't buy for herself. Don't just buy her sheets- buy the amazing "i never want to get out of bed because these are so comfortable" sheets. DS gave me a kitchen aid mixer one year. We only had a hand mixer and I was fine with that. But I wouldn't give it up for anything.
Best story- My Dad gave my mom a miter box for christmas one year. All hell broke loose in the house she was so pissed. He finally said " the real gift is what I'm going to make with it." He made her some beautiful picture frames for some really old family photos. They have been divorced for 20 years and she still has (and loves) those frames.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Nov 7, 2014 11:20:12 GMT -5
I've been begging for a window seat with storage to be built in my bedroom walk-out bay window, but I doubt I'll get it. Something like this: ![window](http://www.skroutzondeck.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/furniture-long-white-bay-window-seating-with-double-storage-space-inside-13-fascinating-bay-window-seat-design-with-storage-for-your-inspirations.jpg) She wants that too but for our living room. I don't because I think it is the perfect spot for a Christmas tree. ![](http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh135/cawiau/Mobile%20Uploads/2014-05/FD5C6B66-ED65-4E0A-B87B-E40F45DBDD94_zpsulhcj65u.jpg)
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gooddecisions
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Post by gooddecisions on Nov 7, 2014 11:53:11 GMT -5
I've been begging for a window seat with storage to be built in my bedroom walk-out bay window, but I doubt I'll get it. Something like this: ![window](http://www.skroutzondeck.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/furniture-long-white-bay-window-seating-with-double-storage-space-inside-13-fascinating-bay-window-seat-design-with-storage-for-your-inspirations.jpg) She wants that too but for our living room. I don't because I think it is the perfect spot for a Christmas tree. ![](http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh135/cawiau/Mobile%20Uploads/2014-05/FD5C6B66-ED65-4E0A-B87B-E40F45DBDD94_zpsulhcj65u.jpg) It would be a great place for a Christmas tree; however, a Christmas tree is only up one month out of 12. A friend once told me to design your space based on what you need it to be most of the time, not a fraction of the time. Regardless, it can be a future goal as you feel out your new home and prioritize your wants.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Nov 7, 2014 11:56:58 GMT -5
Or do what someone in my neighborhood did - build the window-seat, then put a christmas tree MADE ENTIRELY OUT OF CREEPY DOLLS on top of the seat. Then light the window for maximum effect.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Nov 7, 2014 12:02:33 GMT -5
I don't really get the 'things for the house as christmas gift' concept. if you need something for the house, buy it. if it means there's less to spend on christmas gifts, so be it. I think the thing is that there are large gray areas of need. A lot of times practical items aren't technically needed, there's already a clunky or time consuming system in place, it can just be a hassle and annoying to the person who does it. So an upgrade that isn't technically needed (the work is still getting done) can seem really nice especially if money is tight. Just my understanding. I do think it's often best to default to more traditional gifts, but if someone asks specifically for something else, it makes sense to me, like a family with little kids getting a cleaning service for Christmas or something. Less stress can be super good. I needed a vacuum. I wanted a Dyson. Big difference.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Nov 7, 2014 12:07:02 GMT -5
Sounds like Mrs. C is thinking the same way. She loves her home and really enjoys making it special. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/smiley.png) Yeah I guess you are right but just feels weird. Here I buy you this "thing" that I will probably end up using just as much or often as you. Off course if it was to me I probably would not spend that much on it but ok. I love getting house stuff as long as it is something I want. I can really want something, but feel it isn't worth spending the money to just go out & buy it. So getting it as a gift is perfect because I don't have to justifying spending the money on something I don't really need.
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Peace77
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Post by Peace77 on Nov 7, 2014 12:25:23 GMT -5
Yes, get her something for the house but her her something inexpensive and personal too. Some of her favorite chocolate, a bottle of wine, or a gift certificate for a nice restaurant for a date night.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Nov 7, 2014 12:26:40 GMT -5
I want some big fluffy towels for Christmas. The last towels we got were for a wedding present, 11 years ago.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2014 12:29:06 GMT -5
I think the thing is that there are large gray areas of need. A lot of times practical items aren't technically needed, there's already a clunky or time consuming system in place, it can just be a hassle and annoying to the person who does it. So an upgrade that isn't technically needed (the work is still getting done) can seem really nice especially if money is tight. Just my understanding. I do think it's often best to default to more traditional gifts, but if someone asks specifically for something else, it makes sense to me, like a family with little kids getting a cleaning service for Christmas or something. Less stress can be super good. I needed a vacuum. I wanted a Dyson. Big difference. Yep. A basic model versus one that's easy/nice to use can make an enormous difference, especially if the item is used regularly.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2014 12:36:03 GMT -5
I needed a vacuum. I wanted a Dyson. Big difference. Yep. A basic model versus one that's easy/nice to use can make an enormous difference, especially if the item is used regularly. still not getting it. If my DH (if I had one) decide we need a vacuum and I want a dyson, I get a dyson. I don't need to wait for a gift giving holiday because what I want is above some average price. now if we decide that because we spent $500 on a vacuum we're only spending $50 on each other for christmas, that's a whole separate thing.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Nov 7, 2014 12:37:33 GMT -5
Yep. A basic model versus one that's easy/nice to use can make an enormous difference, especially if the item is used regularly. still not getting it. If my DH (if I had one) decide we need a vacuum and I want a dyson, I get a dyson. I don't need to wait for a gift giving holiday because what I want is above some average price. now if we decide that because we spent $500 on a vacuum we're only spending $50 on each other for christmas, that's a whole separate thing. I feel like I need to give myself permission or have a special occasion to buy myself something I ordinarily wouldn't spend the money on.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Nov 7, 2014 12:38:03 GMT -5
Yep. A basic model versus one that's easy/nice to use can make an enormous difference, especially if the item is used regularly. still not getting it. If my DH (if I had one) decide we need a vacuum and I want a dyson, I get a dyson. I don't need to wait for a gift giving holiday because what I want is above some average price. now if we decide that because we spent $500 on a vacuum we're only spending $50 on each other for christmas, that's a whole separate thing. A need doesn't equal a want. I suppose you could just buy it & then say we aren't doing gifts because we spent so much on a vacuum. But, for most of us we just translate that into the vacuum is the gift.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2014 12:38:07 GMT -5
still not getting it. If my DH (if I had one) decide we need a vacuum and I want a dyson, I get a dyson. I don't need to wait for a gift giving holiday because what I want is above some average price. now if we decide that because we spent $500 on a vacuum we're only spending $50 on each other for christmas, that's a whole separate thing. I feel like I need to give myself permission or have a special occasion to buy myself something I ordinarily wouldn't spend the money on. that is not a problem I have ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/wink.png)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2014 12:43:12 GMT -5
Yep. A basic model versus one that's easy/nice to use can make an enormous difference, especially if the item is used regularly. still not getting it. If my DH (if I had one) decide we need a vacuum and I want a dyson, I get a dyson. I don't need to wait for a gift giving holiday because what I want is above some average price. now if we decide that because we spent $500 on a vacuum we're only spending $50 on each other for christmas, that's a whole separate thing. Honestly, different people like different things, and people have all sorts of various points in their lives too. No need to have everyone agree on what they like. As I mentioned, the tool joy is new to me. But when we first bought the house, we really didn't have a whole lot of money going around, not broke, but we couldn't run out and buy anything if we could make do without. I took apart a tree that fell on the driveway with a handsaw DH's dad had given us, just switching arms back and forth for an entire day until it was in pieces small enough that I could drag away. Obviously that works, it's just really time consuming. A fancy chainsaw is wonderful in comparison. A knife and cutting board or masher gets jobs done, but a blender can be nice if someone cooks a lot and feels a desire for streamlining. I've washed clothes in the bathtub and others use laundrymats, but a washer/dryer can be so much nicer. If you feel differently though, that makes sense, everyone has different experiences and thoughts ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/thumbsup.png)
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Nov 7, 2014 13:23:36 GMT -5
Or do what someone in my neighborhood did - build the window-seat, then put a christmas tree MADE ENTIRELY OUT OF CREEPY DOLLS on top of the seat. Then light the window for maximum effect. THAT IS A GREAT IDEA!!!!!
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sesfw
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Post by sesfw on Nov 7, 2014 19:21:35 GMT -5
Also expensive enough that I don't to buy another
I would suggest a bottle of her favorite perfume also. Or the newest book by her favorite author.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 7, 2014 19:42:59 GMT -5
I'm hoping to be able to buy myself a carpet steam cleaner for Christmas.
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murphath
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Post by murphath on Nov 7, 2014 20:37:01 GMT -5
I prefer to get something I've been wanting for the house. But then I don't wear a lot of jewelry and items with the designers name/initials on them drive me crazy so my hubby is always safe buying me a house item. I've been dropping hints about a Kitchen Aid mixer so keep your fingers crossed for me.
Give her what she wants.
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seriousthistime
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Post by seriousthistime on Nov 7, 2014 20:43:51 GMT -5
Just don't do what my XH would do regarding house gifts. He bought me wine glasses because he thought we needed them. I hated the ones he chose, and we didn't need them. He bought me pots and pans (Calphalon) because he thought we needed them. We did need new ones, but I would not have chosen those, and hated the hours I spent over the sink scrubbing those pots and pans. He bought me a ravioli mold. Of course we needed that. Of course! Right ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/huh.gif) Of course we did. And it's totally what I wanted. Not! It came with a huge obligation to make homemade ravioli for him. If you're going to go that route, ask, and get specific. Try Amazon Wish List.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Nov 7, 2014 21:07:06 GMT -5
Or do what someone in my neighborhood did - build the window-seat, then put a christmas tree MADE ENTIRELY OUT OF CREEPY DOLLS on top of the seat. Then light the window for maximum effect. THAT IS A GREAT IDEA!!!!! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...
although I could see that working for Halloween. Probably cuts down on the Trick or Treaters.
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marvholly
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Post by marvholly on Nov 8, 2014 7:18:28 GMT -5
IMHO: I was ok w/house based gifts (NOT electronics like tv or computer) for Christmas & anniversary but NOT for my bday. Bday needed to be something special, just for me because it was MY special day.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Nov 8, 2014 7:36:04 GMT -5
Yeah I guess you are right but just feels weird. Here I buy you this "thing" that I will probably end up using just as much or often as you. Off course if it was to me I probably would not spend that much on it but ok. I love getting house stuff as long as it is something I want. I can really want something, but feel it isn't worth spending the money to just go out & buy it. So getting it as a gift is perfect because I don't have to justifying spending the money on something I don't really need. Yeah that! ![:)](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/smiley.png)
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Happy prose
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Post by Happy prose on Nov 8, 2014 7:53:06 GMT -5
One year I bought myself a coat, and told my husband he could buy it as my present. This year, we need 2 new recliners, so gifts for each other. I asked my daughter for a new food processor. Mine works fine, but it was my mom's, so very old. It doesn't have the plug with two different sized prongs, so I'm nervous to use it. Justified fear, or no?
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violagirl
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Post by violagirl on Nov 8, 2014 9:44:34 GMT -5
We are at the point in our lives where we don't really "need" stuff so gift giving/receiving is getting difficult. I'd rather a person not feel obligated to buy me something because of a special day but rather be out and see something and think "wow Violagirl would LOVE that!!" and then buy it. For example, I do not need any more platters or random punch bowls. I do enjoy going out for a nice dinner or being invited over to someones house for an evening. Perfectly happy doing that. I would consider not having to cook to be a gift.
Now when my husband is travelling in foreign countries for work it has become our tradition for him to bring me back something from that country. He likes to pack light when he travels so I tell him jewellery is perfect. He is getting better at picking things out that I like.
I prefer spontaneous gifts that are meaningful.
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bookkeeper
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Post by bookkeeper on Nov 8, 2014 9:59:32 GMT -5
I once received a set of four new tires on my car for Mother's Day. The first Christmas we spent in our last home (1998) DH suggested we buy a Heat and Glow gas fireplace insert and replace the wood burning unit in the house. It was the best present ever. We used it every cold day for 16 years.
I grew up in a house that burned wood in the winter, and I felt like queen for a day when I hit the remote to start the gas fireplace. No cutting wood, no splitting wood, no hauling ashes.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 8, 2014 12:16:44 GMT -5
I like to get practical stuff as gifts. That way I have the money to buy the '''fun stuff" for myself and enjoy doing it!
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Nov 8, 2014 17:53:46 GMT -5
Sounds like Mrs. C is thinking the same way. She loves her home and really enjoys making it special. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/smiley.png) Yeah I guess you are right but just feels weird. Here I buy you this "thing" that I will probably end up using just as much or often as you. Off course if it was to me I probably would not spend that much on it but ok. (I haven't read past this post.) A few examples for us: My DH LOVES to cook. He'd be a chef if wasn't more strongly called to be an educator. For Christmas last year, I got him a Breville pizza oven. For his birthday/Father's Day (always on the same week), I got him a Traeger smoker/BBQ/grill. He is still estatic. The pizza oven was a surprise (although he'd drooled over it in the Williams-Sonoma catalogs for several months). For the Traeger, he opened up a card while at a restaurant that said "we're going shopping now for a BBQ!". I didn't want to pick out the BBQ because I wanted him to get exactly what he wanted. If I was going to spend what ended up being $400, I wasn't going guess at it. That day, we went to four stores, and then he spent two weeks researching online. He enjoyed that so much. The rest of us benefit from the gift also, but he really does see them as gifts for him because he gets to cook. He has now figured out how to access my Pinterest account. For my recent birthday, he found a pin of mine of dinnerware that would perfectly match my great room decor. I NEVER would have purchased these. I was just drooling over them. But, now I have twelve place settings plus two serving dishes. Yes, everyone else uses them, but they enhance my kitchen (glass cupboard doors) and dining table. So, they really are a gift for me. If that's what she's asking for, and you're really getting her something that is enhancing the house--not just meeting basic needs--then it is a gift for her.
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Formerly SK
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Post by Formerly SK on Nov 8, 2014 19:29:29 GMT -5
Fixed.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2014 0:40:36 GMT -5
Get her what she wants. It will bring peace and harmony and no bodily harm will come to you. Just ask DH. I still haven't figured out the Waterpik from a few years ago. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/undecided.png) Or you could do what he did for our first Christmas together and get her a bottle of Midol. I think I put a dent in his head throwing it at him. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/angry.png) The best presents ever are our current house and my cat. I don't need anymore crap so I'm good with stuff for the house. Otherwise, just give me a gift card/cash for the bookstore. That's all I want.
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Spellbound454
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Post by Spellbound454 on Nov 9, 2014 7:51:04 GMT -5
If I want something for the house, I'll just buy it.....and I'm quite choosy, so it would be tricky for someone else to get what I wanted unless I sent them with a list. I just want small gifts really, given with love. Perfume, Jewellery, Sweets, Nightwear, Books, Wine.... Antique silver, Crystal or China for my collections. ...and that's generally what I get ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/smiley.png) Christmas is always a bit fraught...A house full of people and all-day cooking. The most important thing for me...after the presents and visitors..... is sitting down together for the meal....and its got to be perfect. We slob out together watching a bit of TV....then get our glad rags on to pile down the pub.
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