moon/Laura
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Post by moon/Laura on Aug 6, 2014 18:11:41 GMT -5
Met my (eventual ex) DH at work. He and I have been nothing but roommates for the last 10 years, and I consider the marriage over, other than the actual legal divorce.
about 9 months ago, I met a guy at a little burrito place we both go to (me on the way to work, him on the way home, at 5:30 am). I was attracted, and it seemed like he was, too, but I called it a chance encounter and didn't really expect to see him again. We did happen to meet again at the beginning of July and exchanged numbers. Come to find out he had been going back to that same place most every day, including his days off, looking for me.
We've been talking daily since then, and get together for a few minutes here and there when we can. It's challenging because he works nights one month, and days the next, 4 on 4 off. Some days we're off together, many we're not. He's in the same type of marriage as I am, and plans to divorce when his 14 yr old graduates. I don't know where it will lead, but we're good for each other right now.
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The Captain
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Hugs are good...
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Post by The Captain on Aug 6, 2014 18:25:06 GMT -5
Before the internet was available to the public there were online bulletin boards. My friend from college ran one (she was the rare unicorn female tech geek) and convinced me to join to get her female membership up.
I kept my gender a secret though, and most though I was a dude because of my handle and posting style. DH was on the same board and we had several good discussions. My friend had a board party and we both went to meet other people.
Our pre-arranged meetings didn't work out, but we hit it off - and the rest is history. It took a small bit of convincing to get him to believe I was the dude he'd been chatting with for several months.
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haapai
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Post by haapai on Aug 6, 2014 18:34:55 GMT -5
I met him at a gay bar when I was 21. He was flirting with my girlfriend while she was sitting on my lap, wearing an identical outfit, on Halloween.
By the conventions that I was living under, this guy had three strikes against him from the start. It took me a couple years to thaw to the unrepentant slutpuppy, but we've been together for over twenty years now.
I realize that that's not entirely helpful unless you're fishing for a when you're not looking cliche.
Okay, that might not be a terrifically helpful story. If I were looking for companionship now, I'd suggest buying a wreck of a home in your own name, re-landscaping the place slowly at strategic times, and acquiring a dog when you do not have a fenced yard. Buying a house in your own name when you are female will attract an interesting variety of singletons and salespersons, which will sharpen your wits and make you realize that being alone isn't all that bad. Landscaping the place yourself will attract everyone, including small, under-supervised children and flirtatious (often married) women bearing excess plants as gifts. Getting a dog when you do not have a fenced yard will require you to take the dog for walks constantly.
YMMV. I'm not sure that this advice would work so well for an extroverted cat lover with a bad back. Although I must admit that the dog is far more extroverted than myself and adores cats, and that I met a lady with a bad back, who gave me excess plants this morning.
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Cookies Galore
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I don't need no instructions to know how to rock
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Post by Cookies Galore on Aug 6, 2014 18:44:29 GMT -5
Met my (eventual ex) DH at work. He and I have been nothing but roommates for the last 10 years, and I consider the marriage over, other than the actual legal divorce.
about 9 months ago, I met a guy at a little burrito place we both go to (me on the way to work, him on the way home, at 5:30 am). I was attracted, and it seemed like he was, too, but I called it a chance encounter and didn't really expect to see him again. We did happen to meet again at the beginning of July and exchanged numbers. Come to find out he had been going back to that same place most every day, including his days off, looking for me.
We've been talking daily since then, and get together for a few minutes here and there when we can. It's challenging because he works nights one month, and days the next, 4 on 4 off. Some days we're off together, many we're not. He's in the same type of marriage as I am, and plans to divorce when his 14 yr old graduates. I don't know where it will lead, but we're good for each other right now.
You can get a burrito at 5:30 in the morning?! Awesome!
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 6, 2014 18:47:17 GMT -5
Highschool band.
Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards
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moon/Laura
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Post by moon/Laura on Aug 6, 2014 18:58:36 GMT -5
Met my (eventual ex) DH at work. He and I have been nothing but roommates for the last 10 years, and I consider the marriage over, other than the actual legal divorce.
about 9 months ago, I met a guy at a little burrito place we both go to (me on the way to work, him on the way home, at 5:30 am). I was attracted, and it seemed like he was, too, but I called it a chance encounter and didn't really expect to see him again. We did happen to meet again at the beginning of July and exchanged numbers. Come to find out he had been going back to that same place most every day, including his days off, looking for me.
We've been talking daily since then, and get together for a few minutes here and there when we can. It's challenging because he works nights one month, and days the next, 4 on 4 off. Some days we're off together, many we're not. He's in the same type of marriage as I am, and plans to divorce when his 14 yr old graduates. I don't know where it will lead, but we're good for each other right now.
You can get a burrito at 5:30 in the morning?! Awesome! yep, that's when they open. and if i'm not there right at that time, i'm going to be late to work, lol. they're good burritos, too. tiny little family owned place.
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Bonny
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Post by Bonny on Aug 6, 2014 19:19:14 GMT -5
Glad to hear its working for you Angel.
My boy is a huge, huge baseball nut. So yeah, its me and the dads and a couple other single moms at every practice/game. But all the dads are married guys, so while we can chat it up through practice/game that doesn't help my social scene any. But they have single friends!
As to the school reunion comment, I know my college alma mater has a Bay Area chapter. I'll bet yours do too. And carve out a sport or club for you once a month. Even super moms need time for themselves.
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Aug 6, 2014 19:21:25 GMT -5
I met him at a gay bar when I was 21. He was flirting with my girlfriend while she was sitting on my lap, wearing an identical outfit, on Halloween. By the conventions that I was living under, this guy had three strikes against him from the start. It took me a couple years to thaw to the unrepentant slutpuppy, but we've been together for over twenty years now. I realize that that's not entirely helpful unless you're fishing for a when you're not looking cliche. Okay, that might not be a terrifically helpful story. If I were looking for companionship now, I'd suggest buying a wreck of a home in your own name, re-landscaping the place slowly at strategic times, and acquiring a dog when you do not have a fenced yard. Buying a house in your own name when you are female will attract an interesting variety of singletons and salespersons, which will sharpen your wits and make you realize that being alone isn't all that bad. Landscaping the place yourself will attract everyone, including small, under-supervised children and flirtatious (often married) women bearing excess plants as gifts. Getting a dog when you do not have a fenced yard will require you to take the dog for walks constantly. YMMV. I'm not sure that this advice would work so well for an extroverted cat lover with a bad back. Although I must admit that the dog is far more extroverted than myself and adores cats, and that I met a lady with a bad back, who gave me excess plants this morning. Ok - Now I'm confused. Did you acquire both the flirty guy at the gay bar and the lady with extra plants? I think you did acquire both the dog and the cats though and I know you have the house and landscaping.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2014 19:34:31 GMT -5
He was the friend of a friend's roommate. The weirder part is the friend's roommate married my sister. I still can't believe someone actually took her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2014 19:39:11 GMT -5
Somehow the online world of dating just seems icky - haven't done it but can't shake that "don't go there" feeling. My dad and step-mom met via an online dating site. My step-mom met quite a few people via online dating and they were all very nice (my dad only met my step-mom). I know a few people who met their spouses via online dating sites. Depending on where you live and your hobbies, it's often one of the only places to meet people once you get over the age of 30-35. So I wouldn't discount online dating in the future even if you don't want to try it now. 2 of my cousins met guys online. One is married to a pretty cool guy and the other one is supposedly engaged to a real dick, and has been for about 6 years, and we're all kind of hoping he dies in some kind of fiery accident so the wedding, HAH!, doesn't actually happen.
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cronewitch
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I identify as a post-menopausal childless cat lady and I vote.
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Post by cronewitch on Aug 6, 2014 19:40:50 GMT -5
I joined Seattle Singles in 1985 or 1986. They matched you up and sent photos of men you might be interested in but I wasn't. They also had volleyball and dart games for single people so you met lots of people. One lady invited people over 35 for a wine and cheese party at her house. I went and there were only a few people already there so I asked who's truck that was. The truck had bumper stickers that said I would rather be fishing and don't complain camp in the rain. I had a question about fishing rods so needed to meet him. I got his phone number and called him the next day to invite him to brunch the following day at my house. His truck also had a dog so I invited the dog to brunch too. We had waffles with strawberries and whipped cream, dog had ham bone in the fenced back yard. Three days later was my birthday so he brought me a cake and flowers to my office. He worked swing and I worked days so he often came to take me to lunch. Then it was summer and he couldn't leave his dog in his truck so he would ask if his dog could stay at my house and he could pick him up at midnight. So he showed up at midnight and was still there mornings when I went to work asking if he could leave the dog again. Soon his dog was living at my house and he moved his tv to my house since I didn't have one and his stereo. He only went to his house to get his mail every few days since his house didn't have a dog or tv then. By the end of summer of 86 he gave up his house he was renting and moved to my house.
BTW if a man leaves his dog at your house you can be pretty sure you will see him again if he loves his dog. He said that dog was the only thing good he got out of his marriage, he had her 18 years.
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cronewitch
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I identify as a post-menopausal childless cat lady and I vote.
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Post by cronewitch on Aug 6, 2014 19:50:50 GMT -5
One of my friends from HS married his brother. Are you still friends with her? Would be nice to have a SIL that you can be friends with!! My brother married best friends in 1967 they are still friends. One divorced my brother but we all still like her and all go to each others homes occasionally. She come to see my mom last summer and to mom's funeral and the year before we all went to her house for a wedding of her daughter. I have known her since a few years before she married my brother since we were all in the same club.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 6, 2014 20:33:25 GMT -5
We met at work. We worked together for four years. We were both married to other people at the time. Then he divorced and left the job to start his own business. I left a year later for the competition. We were good friends and always kept in touch. A few years after that, my ex left me for an older model, and he decided to try to cheer me up. It worked.
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t-dog
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Post by t-dog on Aug 6, 2014 21:02:52 GMT -5
Bonny- both my undergrad and law school have SF alumni chapters, but being 90 miles from SF and them doing mostly 5:30 pm events hasnt worked since graduation in 1990 and 97 respectively. God, I sound like Doxie...HELP!
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ners
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Post by ners on Aug 6, 2014 22:02:24 GMT -5
I met my first DH at my younger brother's baseball game.
I met my current DF at a baseball convention.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Aug 6, 2014 22:13:27 GMT -5
Met my DH online though AOL in 1998. It was during dialup ( ) and you could have a profile setup of whatever you wanted. One of the setting was "online at the time". As it turned out, I was female, single, lived in that particular state, and online at the time. We "talked" online for about 1.5 months before he surprised me at my job. (Yes, I did tell him where I worked. I was a naive 19 year old.) We met for lunch a week later and the rest is history. We've been together almost 16 years, married for 10 years and have an adorable 3 year old. DH's best friend met his wife a similar way a year or so later. They have been together 14/15 years (brief breakup), married for 9 years and have 2 adorable kiddos. Also, my brother knew his wife when they were 8 years old; however, girls are "icky" then. Several years later, they reconnected online somehow. He flew out to see her again while he was deciding where to live (financial issues, not his best time) and decided to stay. They've been together for 12 years (I think), married for almost 6 years and have an adorable 2 year old.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Aug 6, 2014 22:14:00 GMT -5
I met him at a gay bar when I was 21. He was flirting with my girlfriend while she was sitting on my lap, wearing an identical outfit, on Halloween. By the conventions that I was living under, this guy had three strikes against him from the start. It took me a couple years to thaw to the unrepentant slutpuppy, but we've been together for over twenty years now. I realize that that's not entirely helpful unless you're fishing for a when you're not looking cliche. Okay, that might not be a terrifically helpful story. If I were looking for companionship now, I'd suggest buying a wreck of a home in your own name, re-landscaping the place slowly at strategic times, and acquiring a dog when you do not have a fenced yard. Buying a house in your own name when you are female will attract an interesting variety of singletons and salespersons, which will sharpen your wits and make you realize that being alone isn't all that bad. Landscaping the place yourself will attract everyone, including small, under-supervised children and flirtatious (often married) women bearing excess plants as gifts. Getting a dog when you do not have a fenced yard will require you to take the dog for walks constantly. YMMV. I'm not sure that this advice would work so well for an extroverted cat lover with a bad back. Although I must admit that the dog is far more extroverted than myself and adores cats, and that I met a lady with a bad back, who gave me excess plants this morning. I feel like I just tripped out on acid... Here is your test - is Haapi a male or female? For years, I thought he was a guy. then "he" called himself a term that I've never seen before but good ol' Google told me it meant "male lesbian" and now we are back to "he". If you know the answer, you are in better shape than I am I am just soooo confused......
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Aug 6, 2014 22:18:07 GMT -5
I feel like I just tripped out on acid... Here is your test - is Haapi a male or female? For years, I thought he was a guy. then "he" called himself a term that I've never seen before but good ol' Google told me it meant "male lesbian" and now we are back to "he". If you know the answer, you are in better shape than I am I am just soooo confused...... I'm confused.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Aug 6, 2014 22:24:34 GMT -5
I think there are lesbians who identify as "male" in the relationship and i think there is a specific term for it.. I could be TOTALLY wrong, though.
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resolution
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Post by resolution on Aug 6, 2014 22:41:19 GMT -5
I met DH playing an online video game. He put together a static group of 6 players to farm a new dungeon that had uber loots. We would all talk in voice chat as we played and got to know each other pretty well. When his character started flirting with mine it took a few months for me to figure out if he was role playing his character being interested in my character, or if he was interested in me in real life.
There are a lot of opportunities to meet people online that don't involve dating sites. If you like gaming, there are a lot of men in their 30s and 40s that are playing online games. There are also a lot of specialty forums and message boards based around a topic. Some close friends of mine met on a Wiccan message board and have been married 10 years now. The downside is that most of the people gaming and on the chat sites aren't looking for someone, but the up side is that if you find someone that is looking, you will be starting out with a strong common interest.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Aug 6, 2014 23:02:12 GMT -5
I feel like I just tripped out on acid... Here is your test - is Haapi a male or female? For years, I thought he was a guy. then "he" called himself a term that I've never seen before but good ol' Google told me it meant "male lesbian" and now we are back to "he". If you know the answer, you are in better shape than I am I am just soooo confused...... Haapai is a chick who used to date girls, but now has a boyfriend. She taught me the best term ever which is hasbien. ;D I'll be shocked if I'm wrong. Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Aug 7, 2014 0:47:34 GMT -5
We met while pretending to be vampires. We were friends for a few years first. In fact, I dated a friend of his for a while, and that friend asked C if I was "crazy" before asking me out. One of mine and C's first dates was actually that same friend of his/ex of mine making us dinner.
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steff
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I'll sleep when I'm dead
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Post by steff on Aug 7, 2014 2:06:17 GMT -5
It was my 2nd day (I think, 2nd or 3rd day) bartending at a very small neighborhood ice house. It was Super Bowl Sunday, when Dallas beat Buffalo and it also happened to be hubby's birthday. I was trying to set up tables for the food buffet & I asked 3 different guys if they would help me move a heavy table. Hubby was the only one who said yes. I bought him a beer for helping me & one for his bday. At a Valentine's Day Chili Cookoff (because what says love more than chili? LOL) his team was the only one who sent me a cup of chili while I was working. I thought it was sweet. We went out for the first time on St Patrick's Day, which was the bar anniversary/big party. We went out to dinner after I got done with the day shift at the bar. And it took off from there. We hid it from my boss for awhile because he had a rule of no dating the customers. But he figured it out and didn't have a problem with it. In fact, he was the judge that married us. I got knocked up on my bday in August, we got married in October. Had kiddo in May the next year. Married 21 years this October.
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Mardi Gras Audrey
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So well rounded, I'm pointless...
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Post by Mardi Gras Audrey on Aug 7, 2014 2:23:47 GMT -5
We met at a party in a trailer park. We were in the same unit in the military and were both newbies. Our coworkers invited us to the party separately because we were both new. The guy who brought DH asked me to make sure DH got to his hotel safely (the guy had to leave and I was one of the few sober people left). I thought he was a player and a jerk the first night we met (He invited me into his hotel room after we spent like 2 minutes talking.. umm, no.). Turns out, he was just a nice guy who "want to come inside to hang out" meant just that). We got to be friends after getting to know each other more and we started dating right after my work group got moved to another unit (so we were not longer "co-workers"). I like to say we blame Bush for all this...
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Aug 7, 2014 8:03:31 GMT -5
Here is your test - is Haapi a male or female? For years, I thought he was a guy. then "he" called himself a term that I've never seen before but good ol' Google told me it meant "male lesbian" and now we are back to "he". If you know the answer, you are in better shape than I am I am just soooo confused...... Haapai is a chick who used to date girls, but now has a boyfriend. She taught me the best term ever which is hasbien. I'll be shocked if I'm wrong. Sent from my ADR6410LVW using proboards yes, that the term that was mentioned, but I am pretty sure I will never understand the other part......
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Sunnyday
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Post by Sunnyday on Aug 7, 2014 8:49:44 GMT -5
We met in college. If I were to get divorced now, I have no idea where I'd meet someone. All my friends are married with kids and I can't think of anyone that is single (mid-30's). In other words, nobody really goes out anymore and that's how I used to meet people. Yes, if I was to get divorced, I think that the people in my age bracket would all already be shacked up or married with kids or come with some serious baggage. I don't know if I could do that. I figure online dating or meet up groups will be the only way to go for me.
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Sunnyday
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Post by Sunnyday on Aug 7, 2014 8:51:18 GMT -5
She picked me up in a bar. We did horizontal vertical dancing until the band stopped and then back to my place for some more dancing. I fixed it for you. Unless you really did horizontal dancing, and in that case.... wow!
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billisonboard
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Post by billisonboard on Aug 7, 2014 9:15:55 GMT -5
LOL! You guys did it in front of everybody? I would think the horizontal dancing happened after you went to your place. Whoops. Got me there.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Aug 7, 2014 9:22:03 GMT -5
Met my (eventual ex) DH at work. He and I have been nothing but roommates for the last 10 years, and I consider the marriage over, other than the actual legal divorce.
about 9 months ago, I met a guy at a little burrito place we both go to (me on the way to work, him on the way home, at 5:30 am). I was attracted, and it seemed like he was, too, but I called it a chance encounter and didn't really expect to see him again. We did happen to meet again at the beginning of July and exchanged numbers. Come to find out he had been going back to that same place most every day, including his days off, looking for me.
We've been talking daily since then, and get together for a few minutes here and there when we can. It's challenging because he works nights one month, and days the next, 4 on 4 off. Some days we're off together, many we're not. He's in the same type of marriage as I am, and plans to divorce when his 14 yr old graduates. I don't know where it will lead, but we're good for each other right now.
You can get a burrito at 5:30 in the morning?! Awesome! LMAO that that's all you got from that story!
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Aug 7, 2014 9:28:21 GMT -5
oh, I met STBX at college. We were in the same dorm and met through a mutual friend. I thought he was weird and kind of a know-it-all (and I was right ), but he was nice. We became friends, and then we became more. I'm not really looking to meet anyone romantically right now for various reasons, but I am looking to make some more local friends. I'm going to log into my MeetUp account again and look for a single moms/book club/biking group to join.
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