zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jun 20, 2014 9:38:57 GMT -5
I didn't live in the boondocks and I left my kids in the car. This, of course, was before everyone got into everyone else's business, thank GOD.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 9:39:36 GMT -5
So, how do you people that never leave your kids in the car (especially those of you with more than one) handle carrying small children AND the milk, eggs, mug of coffee or whatever? I really can't imagine going to a KT to get milk in the winter, unbuckling a 6 month old and 3 year old, putting on their winter gear. Carrying the baby, leading the toddler, going into the store, and grabbing a couple things, then getting them all back out to the car, taking off the winter gear, buckling them back in.... I'm seriously not being a bitch here- I get that decisions have to be made. You can't get the gallon of milk on your way to pick your kids up from daycare? I guess if it was that big of a hassle for me to take my kids places I'd try to plan better. It's not even a matter of leaving the Boy in the car now. When I know I'm out of milk I'll pick a gallon up and throw it in the fridge at work during my lunch hour so I can grab it on my way home.
Muttley's is an extreme case (when she left the baby in the running car to get her paycheck). I understand her logic but I don't know if I would have made that same choice. I can't say what I would have done in that situation.
Sometimes. It's not always that easy. I live 20 miles from town and we often don't go home right after daycare. There is swimming lessons, scouts, doctor/dentist appointments. All kinds of stuff I fill in between getting off work at 4 and actually driving home. Getting a gallon of milk before getting the kids isn't a great idea when it's going to be sitting in the van for 2 hours in 80 degree weather. Then there's the long drives. Last weekend I drove up to Duluth and there were lots of stops there and back. Sometimes the kids came in because they had to use the bathroom too, but I drove back at night and they slept almost the entire way. I stopped a couple times for coffee and the bathroom and left them sleeping out there.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 9:43:06 GMT -5
So, how do you people that never leave your kids in the car (especially those of you with more than one) handle carrying small children AND the milk, eggs, mug of coffee or whatever? I really can't imagine going to a KT to get milk in the winter, unbuckling a 6 month old and 3 year old, putting on their winter gear. Carrying the baby, leading the toddler, going into the store, and grabbing a couple things, then getting them all back out to the car, taking off the winter gear, buckling them back in.... That is what I was wondering. Here are examples of some times I might leave my kids in the car: - 2 AM on a roadtrip, they are all sleeping & I have to pee at a gas station. I might wake up DS just to let him know. - 6 PM on a snowy day when we need milk & I can run into the gas station. - 6 AM stop at safeway if grabbing 1 thing, can literally park next to the door & there is never a line. - Anytime on a cool day if I have to stop at work and grab something. - Picking up DD at daycare on a cool day, I would leave both DS's in the car (rarely is this the pickup order, so doesn't happen often). - Picking up DS1 on a cool day, I would leave DD in the car (rarely does she ask to stay in the car, last time was April fools & she wanted to trick her brother into thinking he was picked up first, he cried ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) ). - I once left them in the car when I had to take a bunch of luggage up to a motel room. I literally could not take the kids & the luggage at the same time. So I could either leave them in the room & go get the luggage or leave them in the car. I felt much better leaving them in the car & did so. I would never leave them in the car if I was going to a bank, a walmart, almost any big box store (exception being the 6 AM stops at Safeway), restaurant, post office, somewhere where I had to park far from the door, etc.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 9:46:35 GMT -5
I'm seriously not being a bitch here- I get that decisions have to be made. You can't get the gallon of milk on your way to pick your kids up from daycare? I guess if it was that big of a hassle for me to take my kids places I'd try to plan better. It's not even a matter of leaving the Boy in the car now. When I know I'm out of milk I'll pick a gallon up and throw it in the fridge at work during my lunch hour so I can grab it on my way home.
Muttley's is an extreme case (when she left the baby in the running car to get her paycheck). I understand her logic but I don't know if I would have made that same choice. I can't say what I would have done in that situation.
was there no one who she could call to being the check down? I am pretty certain she works in a tiny office & it sounds like it was late. Odds are there was no one to call.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Jun 20, 2014 9:46:56 GMT -5
As the Boy would say "All of my NOPE". Not happening. Hell I'm so neurotic I would wake up my 16 year old and make him come inside with me rather than leave him in the car in the parking lot of a random convenience store in the middle of the night. Sorry not happening.
All I can think when I see gas stations at night is that urban legend about the guy hiding in the backseat of the lady's car waiting to kill her. Nope. Not even for a minute. I'm not a brave person when it comes to things like that. Hell I won't even watch Supernatural unless someone else is in the house with me (they don't have to be in the same room anymore)
** ETA_ this is in response to leaving the kids sleeping in the car while going in for a bathroom break at a gas station in the middle of the night.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 9:50:14 GMT -5
So, how do you people that never leave your kids in the car (especially those of you with more than one) handle carrying small children AND the milk, eggs, mug of coffee or whatever? I really can't imagine going to a KT to get milk in the winter, unbuckling a 6 month old and 3 year old, putting on their winter gear. Carrying the baby, leading the toddler, going into the store, and grabbing a couple things, then getting them all back out to the car, taking off the winter gear, buckling them back in.... That is what I was wondering. Here are examples of some times I might leave my kids in the car: - 2 AM on a roadtrip, they are all sleeping & I have to pee at a gas station. I might wake up DS just to let him know. - 6 PM on a snowy day when we need milk & I can run into the gas station. - 6 AM stop at safeway if grabbing 1 thing, can literally park next to the door & there is never a line. - Anytime on a cool day if I have to stop at work and grab something. - Picking up DD at daycare on a cool day, I would leave both DS's in the car (rarely is this the pickup order, so doesn't happen often). - Picking up DS1 on a cool day, I would leave DD in the car (rarely does she ask to stay in the car, last time was April fools & she wanted to trick her brother into thinking he was picked up first, he cried ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) ). - I once left them in the car when I had to take a bunch of luggage up to a motel room. I literally could not take the kids & the luggage at the same time. So I could either leave them in the room & go get the luggage or leave them in the car. I felt much better leaving them in the car & did so. I would never leave them in the car if I was going to a bank, a walmart, almost any big box store (exception being the 6 AM stops at Safeway), restaurant, post office, somewhere where I had to park far from the door, etc.Same here, except I'm ok with the post office because ours is really small and the entire front is glass and all the parking is one row facing the glass windows. I don't even leave younger son in the car when I return a Redbox movie at Walmart where you have to go inside. It really pisses me off when the Walgreens box isn't working and that's my only option besides going to the other end of town because I have to park a mile away and get the kid out. I think having the van in plain site is my comfort criteria. I mean when we're at home or at a park they're often farther away from me than that when they're playing. I don't watch them every second. Well, him, not them. I don't even count the almost 12 year old anymore. Heck he's home alone by himself right now (the horror!) ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png)
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 9:51:50 GMT -5
As the Boy would say "All of my NOPE". Not happening. Hell I'm so neurotic I would wake up my 16 year old and make him come inside with me rather than leave him in the car in the parking lot of a random convenience store in the middle of the night. Sorry not happening.
All I can think when I see gas stations at night is that urban legend about the guy hiding in the backseat of the lady's car waiting to kill her. Nope. Not even for a minute. I'm not a brave person when it comes to things like that. Hell I won't even watch Supernatural unless someone else is in the house with me (they don't have to be in the same room anymore)
** ETA_ this is in response to leaving the kids sleeping in the car while going in for a bathroom break at a gas station in the middle of the night. Out of curiousity, how would you suggest I get a sleeping 5 year old, 3 year old, & 6 month old inside the gas station so I can pee? I honestly can't imagine the logistics of that. Or is this a plan better situation, as in don't ever drive alone with 3 children at night? ETA - or squat on the side of the road next to the car, so I don't have to walk out of sight?
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jun 20, 2014 9:52:46 GMT -5
I'm seriously not being a bitch here- I get that decisions have to be made. You can't get the gallon of milk on your way to pick your kids up from daycare? I guess if it was that big of a hassle for me to take my kids places I'd try to plan better. It's not even a matter of leaving the Boy in the car now. When I know I'm out of milk I'll pick a gallon up and throw it in the fridge at work during my lunch hour so I can grab it on my way home.
Muttley's is an extreme case (when she left the baby in the running car to get her paycheck). I understand her logic but I don't know if I would have made that same choice. I can't say what I would have done in that situation.
was there no one who she could call to being the check down? Nope. Everyone had left for the weekend. So, if something had happened to me in the office. (Remember small office). Someone would have noticed the car parked on the curb and DD would have been better rather than up in the office with me.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jun 20, 2014 9:54:56 GMT -5
or squat on the side of the road next to the car, so I don't have to walk out of sightWear a diaper like that crazy astronaut lady did. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png)
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Jun 20, 2014 9:57:39 GMT -5
Are there any parents of three who have said that they would never leave their kids in the car under any circumstances? Seems like those saying it are parents of one or two (or no) kids.
From what I remember about my childhood, the logistics were definitely a lot different with one 7yo and two babies vs one 6yo and one baby.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jun 20, 2014 10:02:15 GMT -5
So, how do you people that never leave your kids in the car (especially those of you with more than one) handle carrying small children AND the milk, eggs, mug of coffee or whatever? I really can't imagine going to a KT to get milk in the winter, unbuckling a 6 month old and 3 year old, putting on their winter gear. Carrying the baby, leading the toddler, going into the store, and grabbing a couple things, then getting them all back out to the car, taking off the winter gear, buckling them back in.... That is what I was wondering. Here are examples of some times I might leave my kids in the car: - 2 AM on a roadtrip, they are all sleeping & I have to pee at a gas station. I might wake up DS just to let him know. - 6 PM on a snowy day when we need milk & I can run into the gas station. - 6 AM stop at safeway if grabbing 1 thing, can literally park next to the door & there is never a line. - Anytime on a cool day if I have to stop at work and grab something. - Picking up DD at daycare on a cool day, I would leave both DS's in the car (rarely is this the pickup order, so doesn't happen often). - Picking up DS1 on a cool day, I would leave DD in the car (rarely does she ask to stay in the car, last time was April fools & she wanted to trick her brother into thinking he was picked up first, he cried ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) ). - I once left them in the car when I had to take a bunch of luggage up to a motel room. I literally could not take the kids & the luggage at the same time. So I could either leave them in the room & go get the luggage or leave them in the car. I felt much better leaving them in the car & did so. I would never leave them in the car if I was going to a bank, a walmart, almost any big box store (exception being the 6 AM stops at Safeway), restaurant, post office, somewhere where I had to park far from the door, etc.Yep, exactly. If the lady did go to Best buy, than I think she made a very poor decision leaving her child in the car. I wouldn't leave my kids in the car at the bank. Most of the things I would consider doing are when it the errand should only take 1 minute and worst case scenario is 5 minutes. Like said, the location matters too. The gas station in KC was very busy (rush hour), so I took DD in with me. For me, the situations are rare because I have DH around and we do usually plan it so that if it is quick errand we either don't have the kids with us or they can come in. But I've done it before, I'll probably do it again and I don't see the risk. You all are telling me I'm taking a risk and I don't see it. There are enough things in this world that are truly a risk to our kids without manufacturing others to worry about.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 10:05:09 GMT -5
Yep, exactly. If the lady did go to Best buy, than I think she made a very poor decision leaving her child in the car. I agree with this, I wouldn't be comfortable at a best buy. Mine is usually packed & would definitely take more than 5 minutes to get through the line and you are way too far from the car.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Jun 20, 2014 10:05:28 GMT -5
Angel- I can't say what I would do in that situation because I don't have 3 kids. I knew that personally I only wanted one kid so that's all I ever had. I'm not judging you for having more than 1. I'm just saying every parenting decision I have ever made was based on having one kid. As a result I wouldn't likely find myself in a situation in which I had to deal with a 5 year old, 3 year old and 6 month old sleeping in the car while I had to pee at a gas station in the middle of the night.
"They" claim that you get less neurotic with the 2nd and 3rd kid. I wouldn't know. I was a basket case waiting from Tuesday am until Friday evening last weekend to find out that DS made it safely to his host family in Germany. He messaged me once on Wednesday to say he got to Germany but than it was radio silence until Friday night when the Host mom sent me a fb message. I get nervous letting him go into the gas station by himself to buy a soda in the middle of the day!
There is no part of my personality that would leave him sleeping in the car, alone, in the middle of the night, so I could pee.
Again- I have one kid that I am slightly obsessive about and have no idea what decisions I would make if I had more to parent more than one. I have some serious issues and they contribute to my feelings on this subject. My imagination goes to worst case scenario in an instant.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 10:06:50 GMT -5
Yep, exactly. If the lady did go to Best buy, than I think she made a very poor decision leaving her child in the car. I agree with this, I wouldn't be comfortable at a best buy. Mine is usually packed & would definitely take more than 5 minutes to get through the line and you are way too far from the car. ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/yeahthat.gif)
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 10:10:27 GMT -5
"ETA - or squat on the side of the road next to the car, so I don't have to walk out of sight?" You probably didnt say this as a real choice but honestly, if i had 3 kids with those ages, this is what i would do ![:P](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/tongue.png) I wouldn't leave them in the car in a strange place at 2am. I only have one child so sure easier for me to say i wouldnt leave him alone. But if i had 3 i wouldnt leave them alone either unless one was an older responsible kid. I take my kid in to the store even for milk and eggs (i dont shop at gas stations though). I plan and plan. Like getting a haircut, i have to do it at lunch or take off early.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 10:14:43 GMT -5
"You all are telling me I'm taking a risk and I don't see it."
Well only you know your situation fully so if you don't think you are taking a risk, then i am sure you have thought it through. But if i am the stranger walking by your car and see your baby in the car with noone around, i am calling the cops because i was not in your head when you made the decision so i dont know if you were gone and will be gone an hour or 5 minutes or you forgot your baby in the car. These things happen at work parking lots too you know.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2014 10:15:54 GMT -5
I wonder how much of this has to do with where people live? Nothing is going to happen to kids in a gas station parking lot at 2am around here.
I don't think twice about leaving them sleeping to go to the bathroom. It's a really safe area.
As for shopping at the gas station. Milk at the grocery store is over $4/gallon and at the gas station it's $2.69. Eggs are almost always 99 cents a dozen there and butter 1.69. I purposely don't get them at the grocery store because of this.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 10:21:48 GMT -5
"They" claim that you get less neurotic with the 2nd and 3rd kid. I wouldn't know.
I think you have to. You can't have the same level of attention to each kid when you have more kids. Plus, there is something about safety in numbers that makes it easier. I never let DS play out in the yard alone at 3. I wouldn't let DD play out in the yard alone now at 3. But, I will let DD play out in the yard if DS is also out there. I know a 5 year can't actually be responsible for a 3 year old, but I also know he will come hollering if anything is wrong. I also know DD is smart & pretty good, she isn't the type to wander off or go into the street. But, it truly helps that I do have good kids. Mine were never the type to wander out the front door when I'm not looking or to color all over the walls because they found a marker. I caught my neighbor's 3 year old climbing into their car parked in front of their house with the car keys ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) . He is the 5th of 6 kids. They seemed neither surprised nor concerned, I actually don't think they even realized he had left the house until I brought him back. If my kids did stuff like that I would be terrified.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 20, 2014 10:22:09 GMT -5
"ETA - or squat on the side of the road next to the car, so I don't have to walk out of sight?" You probably didnt say this as a real choice but honestly, if i had 3 kids with those ages, this is what i would do ![]() I wouldn't leave them in the car in a strange place at 2am. I only have one child so sure easier for me to say i wouldnt leave him alone. But if i had 3 i wouldnt leave them alone either unless one was an older responsible kid. I take my kid in to the store even for milk and eggs (i dont shop at gas stations though). I plan and plan. Like getting a haircut, i have to do it at lunch or take off early. Thus risking being busted. From www.criminaldefenselawyer.com/resources/criminal-defense/sex-crimes/public-urination-law-penalty.htm
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justme
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Post by justme on Jun 20, 2014 10:23:23 GMT -5
Everyone is saying she went to Best Buy, but that's not in the article. Maybe she did, but when she said that it was a strip mall and parked right in front my first thought went to Radio Shack.
Though to be honest I often get out of Best Buy in 5 minutes because I already know exactly what I want, there's never a line cuz the store mostly sucks anymore, and I just say no to everything.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 20, 2014 10:25:24 GMT -5
Everyone is saying she went to Best Buy, but that's not in the article. Maybe she did, but when she said that it was a strip mall and parked right in front my first thought went to Radio Shack. Though to be honest I often get out of Best Buy in 5 minutes because I already know exactly what I want, there's never a line cuz the store mostly sucks anymore, and I just say no to everything. I was going on memory of reading about this a couple of weeks ago when I said Best Buy type store. I'm not backtracking to confirm or deny my memory though!
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 10:27:25 GMT -5
Everyone is saying she went to Best Buy, but that's not in the article. Maybe she did, but when she said that it was a strip mall and parked right in front my first thought went to Radio Shack. Though to be honest I often get out of Best Buy in 5 minutes because I already know exactly what I want, there's never a line cuz the store mostly sucks anymore, and I just say no to everything. I didn't realize that. I heard best buy & assumed it was in the article. You could also run into a dollar store for head phones & be out within 5 minutes easy most of the time. I would be ok leaving my kids in front of a dollar store depending on the line (and the one I am thinking of has a glass front so you can see the line).
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jun 20, 2014 10:27:48 GMT -5
"You all are telling me I'm taking a risk and I don't see it." Well only you know your situation fully so if you don't think you are taking a risk, then i am sure you have thought it through. But if i am the stranger walking by your car and see your baby in the car with noone around, i am calling the cops because i was not in your head when you made the decision so i dont know if you were gone and will be gone an hour or 5 minutes or you forgot your baby in the car. These things happen at work parking lots too you know. And I said that if I saw a child in my parking lot at work, it would raise my alarm and be more willing to call the cops. Because work is a situation where it is more like an unintended oops and you are there all day. A gas station not so much. The manager of the pizza place next to my office sometimes stops by with her kids. If she is just running in for a second, her car is parked next to the curb. If I see her kids in it, with it next to curb (right outside the back door that has a window), I'm not going to say something. If it was parked in the parking lot and I see her kids, I'm going inside and finding Elaine.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 20, 2014 10:28:20 GMT -5
what if it is concealed by bushes? But then you're not next to the car and not in view of it anymore. ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/idunno.gif) So you might as well stop at a well lit 24 hr. gas station, park close to the door, lock the kids in and go pee as fast as you can.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jun 20, 2014 10:29:31 GMT -5
Everyone is saying she went to Best Buy, but that's not in the article. Maybe she did, but when she said that it was a strip mall and parked right in front my first thought went to Radio Shack. Though to be honest I often get out of Best Buy in 5 minutes because I already know exactly what I want, there's never a line cuz the store mostly sucks anymore, and I just say no to everything. I didn't realize that. I heard best buy & assumed it was in the article. You could also run into a dollar store for head phones & be out within 5 minutes easy most of the time. I would be ok leaving my kids in front of a dollar store depending on the line (and the one I am thinking of has a glass front so you can see the line). I didn't think it said. That is why I said, if it was a Best Buy it was a poor decision. But it doesn't mean it was. Walgreen's carries headphones, right up front too. You could be in and out in less than 5 minutes.
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justme
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Post by justme on Jun 20, 2014 10:29:38 GMT -5
I would think a bush that's private enough is far enough away from lighted, populated areas that it would be more risky of something bad happening if you're so worried about a lighted place like a gas station that almost always has surveillance cameras running.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 10:32:04 GMT -5
what if it is concealed by bushes? Maybe it has to do with my area, but I would feel far less confident driving off the highway down some rural road that I am unfamiliar with in order to find a pulloff with some bushes. If I got a flat tire or stuck in some mud or something, now I don't know where the hell I am & there are going to be no cars around for help. I would take a gas station or mcdonalds any day & run in to pee over that option.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Jun 20, 2014 10:34:25 GMT -5
I would guess not a Best Buy, but technically our best buy is in a strip center, you just can't park next to the door. So who knows.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 20, 2014 10:34:56 GMT -5
I would think a bush that's private enough is far enough away from lighted, populated areas that it would be more risky of something bad happening if you're so worried about a lighted place like a gas station that almost always has surveillance cameras running. that caveat was for private property. Somebody had to show the puppy what "potty spot" meant ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/shucks2.png) Maybe they bust you for trespassing and destruction of property on top of the other stuff?
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on Jun 20, 2014 10:35:23 GMT -5
I would think a bush that's private enough is far enough away from lighted, populated areas that it would be more risky of something bad happening if you're so worried about a lighted place like a gas station that almost always has surveillance cameras running. that caveat was for private property. Somebody had to show the puppy what "potty spot" meant ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/shucks2.png) ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/shocked.gif)
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