swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Apr 3, 2014 10:29:51 GMT -5
Is he a decent guy? Is he good with the kids? Does he know his stuff?
I'm not seeing the problem.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Apr 3, 2014 10:33:21 GMT -5
Just don't stick your tongue down his throat and you're good!
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Apr 3, 2014 10:36:01 GMT -5
Just don't stick your tongue down his throat and you're good! Or maybe do, if you want your son to be the starting pitcher.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Apr 3, 2014 10:36:54 GMT -5
Since I live in a very small rural area, this is actually quite common...........
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 3, 2014 10:40:44 GMT -5
Why would you have an icky guilty feeling? Are you planning on having a clandestine meeting behind the bleachers?
It's the past, him being an ex-boyfriend shouldn't have anything to do with him being your son's baseball coach. You've both moved on with your lives at this point, unless you're planning on cheating there is no reason to avoid him.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 10:42:26 GMT -5
Is he going to want to touch your boobies?
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Apr 3, 2014 10:45:03 GMT -5
Is he going to want to touch your boobies? Is this a rhetorical question? He's a man, and she has boobies. Duh.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 10:48:29 GMT -5
Does your dh know and if not will he flip out about it? (Shouldn't matter of course, but everyone has to choose their own hills to die on).
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 3, 2014 10:53:03 GMT -5
I thought this might be considered very inappropriate or "asking for trouble
It's only asking for trouble if you think you're going to try to jump him in the locker room. If you're not then don't worry about it. What matters is what you think and what you do. If you have no interest in him romantically there is nothing to be guilty about.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 11:05:01 GMT -5
It feels weird because you just saw him. After 2 or 3 practices the feeling should go away.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 11:08:33 GMT -5
Does your dh know and if not will he flip out about it? (Shouldn't matter of course, but everyone has to choose their own hills to die on). I just found out and haven't told him yet. I don't know what his reaction will be. I'd tell your dh and as much as I hate to say it, I'd base my decision on his. If he is a little weirded out maybe he can go to some of the practices (I'm guessing scheduling could be an issue though?), meet the coach with you, remember that everyone has a past and move on. If he flips about it, then truthfully I don't have the energy to fight it and would ask for a transfer--and would file dh's reaction away for bigger decisions. How would you feel if the situation was reversed? Would it bug you if the kids were taking a class from your dh's ex? Does the seriousness of the relationship matter?
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Apr 3, 2014 11:34:26 GMT -5
This being baseball, I say that as long as you don't go further than first base with the coach, you're not doing anything wrong.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 11:37:14 GMT -5
how long ago was this ex - last week or 10 years ago? I'm really not seeing a problem and I think the fact that you see it as a problem (guilty conscience?) is the bigger problem...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 11:39:27 GMT -5
Does your dh know and if not will he flip out about it? (Shouldn't matter of course, but everyone has to choose their own hills to die on). I just found out and haven't told him yet. I don't know what his reaction will be. When you tell him, just say "so and so" is coaching the team, not "my exbf so and so". Cause really, there is way more to the coach's identity than the fact that he once went out with you. And the ex thing implies there is some kind of ongoing relationship. Sorry but there isn't. Neither of you are defined by the fact that you once saw each other naked.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Apr 3, 2014 11:50:00 GMT -5
I would think not mentioning anything would be weirder. I'd probably mention it if I just recognized someone from the grocery store and definitely if I had known them in school, so for me to not disclose that would be a red flag.
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Tennesseer
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Post by Tennesseer on Apr 3, 2014 11:57:12 GMT -5
This being baseball, I say that as long as you don't go further than first base with the coach, you're not doing anything wrong.
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Apr 3, 2014 12:03:44 GMT -5
Hmmm, elaborate on your "guilty conscience". Do you still have feelings for the ex? Or, did you him in a spectacularly mean way?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 12:04:02 GMT -5
how long ago was this ex - last week or 10 years ago? I'm really not seeing a problem and I think the fact that you see it as a problem (guilty conscience?) is the bigger problem... It was a long time ago. I've been married for 11 years and there was another bf in between this one and dh. Yes, my guilty conscience is a problem. There is a good chance that dh will never be able to make it to one game or practice. Does this change anything? Did you do lots of weird freaky sexual things with that BF that you don't do with your husband?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 12:04:26 GMT -5
I just found out and haven't told him yet. I don't know what his reaction will be. When you tell him, just say "so and so" is coaching the team, not "my exbf so and so". Cause really, there is way more to the coach's identity than the fact that he once went out with you. And the ex thing implies there is some kind of ongoing relationship. Sorry but there isn't. Neither of you are defined by the fact that you once saw each other naked. would i want to know? yes would i want to know you once had a "serious" relationship with him? yes if i know both of those going in....no issues if i find out on my own, and you havent told me, that tells me there is a major trust issue
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Apr 3, 2014 12:07:25 GMT -5
It was a long time ago. I've been married for 11 years and there was another bf in between this one and dh. Yes, my guilty conscience is a problem. There is a good chance that dh will never be able to make it to one game or practice. Does this change anything? Did you do lots of weird freaky sexual things with that BF that you don't do with your husband? probably just your average run of the mill sex tape...
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Apr 3, 2014 12:12:00 GMT -5
Or, did you him in a spectacularly mean way? I always go out with a bang. Well, then, Karma is paying you a well-deserved visit.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Apr 3, 2014 12:13:47 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm wondering why you feel guilty. I'm also from a rural area like swamp, so running into people isn't unusual nor is having prolonged contact like a sporting season.
I do think you should mention it to your husband rather than hope he never goes to a game or practice. Does your husband not know about him?
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Apr 3, 2014 12:19:44 GMT -5
I would mention it in a humorous way, with a huge poop-eating grin, along the lines of: "so, I don't know if I ever told you, but I used to be a complete biotch and end relationships really, really, badly. Like, I left permanent scars. Soooooo, in a "it's a small world" kind of way, it turns out that DS's baseball coach this season is one of those people I ran over, backed up over, and ran over again. DH, *you* will have to be the parent that communicates with the coach by email about any scheduling stuff if DS is ever to see any playing time." And, then keep smiling and even giggle devishly.
Done.
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Abby Normal
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Post by Abby Normal on Apr 3, 2014 12:20:05 GMT -5
I live in a small town. We moved here before my son was born. A lot of the people that we interact with in sports/scouts/activities went to highschool together. It's really weird.
But if we had to keep all the exes separate- the town would shut down.
A few years ago, one of the mom's who is very involved with scouts started acting really strange. We were at a function one day and I asked her if she was ok. Turns out her ex BF had joined with his sons and one of them was in her den. All she said was " He's seen me naked" It took her a while to stop feeling like she was 18 again, but she did adjust.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 3, 2014 12:29:23 GMT -5
As long as you don't still have feelings for the guy, I don't see what the issue is. I would tell my husband if I was you though. It would be really awkward if the ex boyfriend was the one to bring it up some day.
Unless the break up was really ugly and he can't stand you and would take it out on your kid. I guess that would be another reason to switch coaches.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Apr 3, 2014 12:31:08 GMT -5
Since I live in a very small rural area, this is actually quite common...........
what - parents having affairs with the coach - or people running into exes in coaching situations? Both. But running into exes in coaching situations is much more common.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Apr 3, 2014 12:35:49 GMT -5
I'm not sure what there is to tell about an ex to DH.
We dated prior to us dating. We don't date anymore.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Apr 3, 2014 12:45:24 GMT -5
I'm not sure what there is to tell about an ex to DH.
We dated prior to us dating. We don't date anymore. You could tell them that you don't miss all of the crazy hot monkey sex you used to have with him all of the time! Yeah, I usually don't mention that to DH..................
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Apr 3, 2014 12:49:14 GMT -5
I'm not sure what there is to tell about an ex to DH.
We dated prior to us dating. We don't date anymore. I'd want to know if this was one of DH's exes but don't think I'd care, unless it was a really bad breakup where he/she still has scars. I think I'd want to know then so I can make sure he/she isn't taking it out on my kid(s)
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Apr 3, 2014 13:45:50 GMT -5
I'm not sure what there is to tell about an ex to DH.
We dated prior to us dating. We don't date anymore. You could tell them that you don't miss all of the crazy hot monkey sex you used to have with him all of the time! LMAO! And you sure don't miss the extra expense of those custom-made condoms you had to buy for his enormous dingaling!
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