NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 23, 2013 9:50:05 GMT -5
My mom thinks that all daughters/DILs and all grandsons are the same person
She must be related to my great uncle. For as long as I can remember he gets my mom and myself the exact same sweater. Not only is it the same sweater but he'll get the same size!! My mom is a large and I am a small. It's become a running joke my mom and I bonded over. Last year he threw us for a loop and we didn't get matching sweaters. The one he bought me has actually become my favorite sweater (a plain teal V-neck). I didn't know what to do when I opened it, he broke the routine!
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milee
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Post by milee on Dec 23, 2013 9:56:26 GMT -5
My mom thinks that all daughters/DILs and all grandsons are the same person. She one daughter will be collecting Christmas snowmen so she'll get us all one. Same with the grandson's= If one likes dinosaurs she'll get them all one. My dad is like this. Unfortunately, his groupings for his 6 children are [children of crazy ex-wife] and [children of beloved saint of a wife who was the best woman who ever lived and was stolen too early from us by cancer]. Not fun to be in group #1. He goes so far as to think that anything the mother of the children knew/liked then the children must know/like as well - as if the mother and all children of that mother are all the same person.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 10:05:27 GMT -5
My mom prefers my sister and my SIL over me so I end up with whatever was on their wish list.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 23, 2013 10:09:48 GMT -5
Pray they have good taste.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 23, 2013 10:10:18 GMT -5
I'd be ok with the Hickory Farms package. I'd rather not get scented anything though - I react to aloe vera so I can't use lotions or soaps that contain it. I'm just starting to use candles again but have a ton I'd like to use up before people buy me more.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2013 10:15:43 GMT -5
Anyone use usowishbook.uso.org/default.aspx ? My GG is like that a bit, at least we don't get all the same stuff any more, just wherever my uncle likes to eat we all get gift cards for... I tried to hint this year, called and explained how I was getting a mass of gift cards to Red Robin, cause we eat there so much and I could get a 20% discount and did she need any, but no! she didn't need any from there... Anyone want a Longhorn gift card?
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 23, 2013 10:20:56 GMT -5
LOL. We do gift cards for my kids' godparents (2 of my siblings and their spouses), I vary the ones for 1 set but the other one told me how much she likes a certain place, so I've been getting her those. Last year I told her (as she was opening them up) that if she wanted something different to let me know. She immediately said "yes please" so this year she's getting Red Robin (actually, I wimped out and did Red Robin for both sets)
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 23, 2013 10:37:33 GMT -5
I'd add that anything that takes up a lot of space in a recipient's small apartment/home/condo would be a (literal) waste of space. Don't buy the proverbial totem pole for the person in a one-bedroom condo. It takes a lot of room, and they have to dust the damned thing. I prefer to give gifts that are disposable (food and beverage, but I will check on the recipient's preferences first) and different. Living in the land of good citrus means we can send the best, and folks in cold climates love it. I like to give things like cute cocktail napkins (they get used a lot during party season), snacks they can serve to other guests or use themselves (jars of gourmet olives or pickled onions are snacks or drink add-ins). If I know the recipient is a wine drinker, there are tons of wine accessories that are small but useful.
If all else fails, a gift card to a place they either love or would love to go to works.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Dec 23, 2013 10:51:45 GMT -5
I might get beaten up for this one....I don't understand/like framed pictures of kids that people send to distant relatives. Um, I know you are my mom's third cousin once removed. But I have only met once in my whole life, for a total of 5 min during some family wedding, why the heck did you send me a framed picture of your 5 kids as a holiday gift? What should I do with it? I am not going to display it on my mantle or anywhere in my house. I do understand and like framed pictures of family members that we meet on a regular basis. But these pictures from distant relations you hardly know....No, I don;t like those. They become a PITA, no point displaying them since there is only so much space in the house. So can't keep them, can't throw them. They just sit in a box in the basement
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 23, 2013 10:57:30 GMT -5
I might get beaten up for this one....I don't understand/like framed pictures of kids that people send to distant relatives. Um, I know you are my mom's third cousin once removed. But I have only met once in my whole life, for a total of 5 min during some family wedding, why the heck did you send me a framed picture of your 5 kids as a holiday gift? What should I do with it? I am not going to display it on my mantle or anywhere in my house. I do understand and like framed pictures of family members that we meet on a regular basis. But these pictures from distant relations you hardly know....No, I don;t like those. They become a PITA, no point displaying them since there is only so much space in the house. So can't keep them, can't throw them. They just sit in a box in the basement That's why I send out photo cards for Christmas. People can see how big my kids are and then toss them at the end of the holiday - or do whatever with it. I toss the photo cards into a box, after making sure the name and year are on them somewhere.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Dec 23, 2013 11:01:24 GMT -5
Beth, that would be awesome if these people did that. But no, its a 11X14 framed picture of their kids. I feel like such a bad person for not liking the gift.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 23, 2013 11:08:49 GMT -5
I could use an 11x14 frame. lol. I'd put something else in the frame.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2013 11:31:24 GMT -5
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alabamagal
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Post by alabamagal on Dec 23, 2013 11:43:23 GMT -5
Christmas mugs!
DH used to be a teacher and would get 3-4 Christmas mugs every year. We have a collection of ~20 still even though it has been 20 years since he last taught. We just set them out on a table for the holidays.
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Sunnyday
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Post by Sunnyday on Dec 23, 2013 11:45:54 GMT -5
I don't receiving gifts because people always gift things to me that I don't want, need or actively hate.
But I was raised well, and despite what goes on in my head. I am extremely polite.
I thanks them graciously and always find something nice to say about the object.
This always gets me more gifts.
Ahhhh! I'm stuck.
And hickory farms, I could never eat their sausages and cheese, because they always came unrefrigerated. It didn't seem right to me that food wouldn't spoil as a child. I know now that it's like vacuum packed, but I never got over my childhood aversion to it.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 23, 2013 11:53:04 GMT -5
But I was raised well, and despite what goes on in my head. I am extremely polite.
I thanks them graciously and always find something nice to say about the object.
This always gets me more gifts.
Ahhhh! I'm stuck.
Same here. I recieved more black purses than I can count from my great uncle and grandmother. Then DH has yet to clue in after 10 years together that "You shouldn't have!' is polite code for "No seriously, I REALLY don't want this, please never buy this type of stuff again"
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Dec 23, 2013 11:57:21 GMT -5
When I think of the money we've spent over the years on our grandkids, who based everything on how many presents each received...I'm so happy they are now old enough for us to say " here's your check". Let them buy what they want.
As for other family members we don't exchange gifts and haven't for years. Why should I spend money on someone who in turn spends some on me? Let's both just keep our own money and eventually get what we want.
Bah humbug!!!!!!!!!! Is it Jan. 2nd yet?
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 12:02:31 GMT -5
I might get beaten up for this one....I don't understand/like framed pictures of kids that people send to distant relatives. Um, I know you are my mom's third cousin once removed. But I have only met once in my whole life, for a total of 5 min during some family wedding, why the heck did you send me a framed picture of your 5 kids as a holiday gift? What should I do with it? I am not going to display it on my mantle or anywhere in my house. I do understand and like framed pictures of family members that we meet on a regular basis. But these pictures from distant relations you hardly know....No, I don;t like those. They become a PITA, no point displaying them since there is only so much space in the house. So can't keep them, can't throw them. They just sit in a box in the basement AMEN! I love my best friend but I have enough pictures! I see the kids often and don't mind a nice picture from time to time but by my calculations they have done formal family pictures 3 times this year plus school pics, dance pics, etc. I don't know what to do with all of these pictures. I rotate them through a frame and then scrapbook the others and give the finished pages back to her. For Christmas I got their card, a calendar of pictures and like 6 or 7 other posed pictures of them. Crazy. My sister is forever giving people framed pictures of her kids. Then she makes one of those stupid (sorry if that offends people) shutterfly calendars for my parents every year. Fine but do you really need to order extra copies of it and hand me mine copy with a request for $11. I throw it in a box and then throw it away right before she gives me the next year's version. Every single year. I have one calendar in my office and one big one on the side of the fridge at the house. I don't need any more calendars. I don't use it ever. She hounds us for pictures for it and then prominently features her kids over the other 6 grandkids. So I pay $11 every year to throw away a calendar that has like 4 unflattering pictures of my son in it. Enough already!!!!!!
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2013 12:09:02 GMT -5
AMEN! I love my best friend but I have enough pictures! I see the kids often and don't mind a nice picture from time to time but by my calculations they have done formal family pictures 3 times this year plus school pics, dance pics, etc. I don't know what to do with all of these pictures. I rotate them through a frame and then scrapbook the others and give the finished pages back to her. For Christmas I got their card, a calendar of pictures and like 6 or 7 other posed pictures of them. Crazy. My sister is forever giving people framed pictures of her kids. Then she makes one of those stupid (sorry if that offends people) shutterfly calendars for my parents every year. Fine but do you really need to order extra copies of it and hand me mine copy with a request for $11. I throw it in a box and then throw it away right before she gives me the next year's version. Every single year. I have one calendar in my office and one big one on the side of the fridge at the house. I don't need any more calendars. I don't use it ever. She hounds us for pictures for it and then prominently features her kids over the other 6 grandkids. So I pay $11 every year to throw away a calendar that has like 4 unflattering pictures of my son in it. Enough already!!!!!! ... Wow, just wow....
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 12:19:33 GMT -5
Yeah- It should come as no shock that I'm kind of a bitch. Sorry to shatter the illusion. I have very few outlets or places where I can really speak my mind. Facebook is all shiny happy because I stupidly accepted friend requests from my relatives so no bitching allowed there. I made a joke once about needing to stop by the liquor store on my way to my mom's for a family reunion and an aunt told my mom and my mom didn't speak to me for 3 weeks. So yup- you all get bitchy Sheila. My sincerely apologies.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 23, 2013 12:25:31 GMT -5
Yeah- It should come as no shock that I'm kind of a bitch. Sorry to shatter the illusion. I have very few outlets or places where I can really speak my mind. Facebook is all shiny happy because I stupidly accepted friend requests from my relatives so no bitching allowed there. I made a joke once about needing to stop by the liquor store on my way to my mom's for a family reunion and an aunt told my mom and my mom didn't speak to me for 3 weeks. So yup- you all get bitchy Sheila. My sincerely apologies. Wait...your sis CHARGES you $11 for a "gift?" Did I read the earlier post right? That's not a gift...I'm not sure what to call it. I guess you could always use the calendar photos as target practice, fuel for the fireplace/barbecue grill, to at least make the money worth it.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Dec 23, 2013 12:39:00 GMT -5
Yes to using the calendar to start the grill!
Sheila, you can complain here anytime. (The rest of us do!)
I love gift cards, so yes, I'll take the Longhorn one off your hands. I know who would welcome those black purses too!
You should've seen some of the useless stuff we used to receive from one of DH's distant relatives. Like Rainyday, we'd thank them politely, and GET RID OF IT.
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tloonya
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Post by tloonya on Dec 23, 2013 12:45:01 GMT -5
I'd rather have scented lotion over a hickory farms box o salt. Be carefull for you wish for. Sometimes those lotions come in bacon or sweat smell
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 12:46:04 GMT -5
Nancy- she gives my parents their copy for free as a gift and then rest of us get a copy and a bill for the cost of printing our copy.
Thanks Busy
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Dec 23, 2013 12:50:09 GMT -5
We get those Hickory Farm gifts from my inlaws every year. We just throw it in the fridge and haul it out at our next Board Game night or something. Honestly we could care less and they'd be better off not sending up anything. But we haven't seen them since January 2009. She sends my DH a couple of FB messages a year- technically she posts on his wall since she doesn't understand private messages. The last one said "Did you hear that Johnny Smith died? He was such a drunk and an asshole- him dying is the best thing that ever happened to this family!" Have I mentioned that DH is FB friends with Johnny's two adult children, his granddaughter and his widow? He deleted her post and explained once again how to send a PM. She is sulking and hasn't responded since then- WOO HOO!!!!!! He can change his facebook settings so no one can post on his wall, or he could change his settings that only he will see what is posted on his wall by someone else, unless he opens that post up to the general world. Rather than lecture and try to train his mom, much easier to just use technology to cover for her.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 12:56:24 GMT -5
Thanks Thyme- I'll suggest that to her. She's been quiet for the past few months now so hopefully she has learned her lesson.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 23, 2013 13:39:52 GMT -5
Nancy- she gives my parents their copy for free as a gift and then rest of us get a copy and a bill for the cost of printing our copy.
Thanks Busy Dear Gawd, sweetie...you have all my holiday sympathies. You get smacked from all sides, don't you? How did you get to be normal and find a normal husband, between the summer-sausage-and-smoked-cheese-senders, the Shutterfly star and your whole family, starring drama mama and her band of merry misfits?
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Dec 23, 2013 13:45:45 GMT -5
Nancy- she gives my parents their copy for free as a gift and then rest of us get a copy and a bill for the cost of printing our copy.
Thanks Busy Dear Gawd, sweetie...you have all my holiday sympathies. You get smacked from all sides, don't you? How did you get to be normal and find a normal husband, between the summer-sausage-and-smoked-cheese-senders, the Shutterfly star and your whole family, starring drama mama and her band of merry misfits? I should salute you for handling so much stress during holidays year after year after year. You work for your Dad's business, don't you? So you get to see the dysfunction in the family whole year long too, just more intensified during holidays?
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 23, 2013 14:33:28 GMT -5
Swasat- all year long. I'm very well compensated for it but money isn't everything. Because my brother is always at their house I'm very rarely there. We all live in the same town but I only go to their house on Mother's Day, Father's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and their birthdays. So I'm at their house maybe 10 times a year. My brother is there probably 4 or 5 times a week.
During the work week- my mom only works on Mondays and my dad is gone on jobsites about 6 to 7 months a year and vacationing another 2 so I only really see him for December, February, March and April.
I tune my brother out for the most part but we don't have a lot of crossover work. I do all the bookkeeping and oversee the day to day operations and bidding and he checks sport scores on ESPN and his email for 8 hours a day.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on Dec 23, 2013 16:02:50 GMT -5
Swasat- all year long. I'm very well compensated for it but money isn't everything. Because my brother is always at their house I'm very rarely there. We all live in the same town but I only go to their house on Mother's Day, Father's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and their birthdays. So I'm at their house maybe 10 times a year. My brother is there probably 4 or 5 times a week. During the work week- my mom only works on Mondays and my dad is gone on jobsites about 6 to 7 months a year and vacationing another 2 so I only really see him for December, February, March and April. I tune my brother out for the most part but we don't have a lot of crossover work. I do all the bookkeeping and oversee the day to day operations and bidding and he checks sport scores on ESPN and his email for 8 hours a day. Can I nominate you for sainthood? We don't have dysfunctional family, just a few crazies on either side. None in the immediate family though. And just those handful make me go batty and want me to jab them in the gut with a 12" knife. You must have loads of patience and tolerance to tolerate this mush on a day to day basis. Hats off to you!!
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