Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Sept 26, 2013 13:44:24 GMT -5
What thing(s) do you think mark someone as a independent adult? What are marks of maturity?
Is it getting married?
Is it having kids?
Is it having a job?
Or a combination of those things, or something else?
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Sept 26, 2013 13:47:13 GMT -5
I have no idea. I'll let you know if I get there. <---------- Yay! I have a 69 in my number! Nope. Still not there....
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HoneyBBQ
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Post by HoneyBBQ on Sept 26, 2013 13:48:00 GMT -5
For me, there were really 2 points. One was when I started my first real job after graduate school and started making real money (@ 25). The second was when I had my daughter at 35. I think the later was the REAL step towards not being a kid anymore. Not just that I had to be responsible for someone else's life, but that I had to be more responsible about my own.
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justme
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Post by justme on Sept 26, 2013 13:50:49 GMT -5
Yeah, it's not easily quantifiable like that. I know too many people will all or some of those things that aren't independent and are completely immature.
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Otto the Orange
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Post by Otto the Orange on Sept 26, 2013 13:55:04 GMT -5
As soon as you become eligible for welfare and food stamps
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Sept 26, 2013 13:56:49 GMT -5
I felt like an adult at 25. I had figured out how to get things done on my own.
Honeybbq made a great point about having kids. I look at everything I do differently now, since every decision impacts my kids.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Sept 26, 2013 14:38:00 GMT -5
I think being a mature adult has absolutely nothing to do with getting married or having kids.
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svwashout
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Post by svwashout on Sept 26, 2013 14:49:41 GMT -5
For me I'd say it was when I moved out of my parents house to go to school on full scholarship. I wasn't completely independent in that I went home for holidays when our dorms closed, and because I was under their health insurance. But my day to day living was entirely up to me. And when my folks wanted to visit me, they asked my permission, they didn't just come. I didn't get a job until after I finished school.
I still don't have two of the three on your list, and when I retire, I'd be immature again? I don't think so, well, unless I move back into Mom's basement.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Sept 26, 2013 14:56:59 GMT -5
What do you consider maturity?
I think having kids, can make you less mature, sometimes. Still doesn't mean that I'm not paying my bills or being absent from work.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Sept 26, 2013 15:03:42 GMT -5
Honestly I can't define it.
Kids and marriage doesn't an adult make.
an you can't use the "has a job" because, teens have a job and stay at home parents don't.
I was leaning toward saying financially supporting oneself, but that doesn't cover it either, again with the stay at home parents and any person who's been laid off and needs a hand. they are certainly adults even if they are in a situation where they can't provide for themselves.
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souldoubt
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Post by souldoubt on Sept 26, 2013 15:04:28 GMT -5
I moved out while working an entry level position having just finished up college. Lived with 2 roommates taking one of the smaller rooms and shared a bathroom. Between not having much money, being out of the house and doing everything for myself I got a much better feel for what being an adult was. 7+ years later I'm still about 3-4 years away from wanting kids and not ready to get married yet despite dating my gf for over 2.5 years and knowing she'll be the mother of those kids some day. I don't think marriage/kids define you as an adult because I know some people who waited on those and were adults long before then while others jumped right into one or both and are far from adults.
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Sept 26, 2013 15:07:23 GMT -5
I think it is when you take responsibility for your life. I know people who have had kids at 15 - they sure as heck weren't mature before and having a kid didn't make them more mature.
It's not so much of a life-changing event that takes place (marriage, kids, etc.), but it is an internal decision to grow up and be responsible.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Sept 26, 2013 15:14:26 GMT -5
I think it is when you take responsibility for your life. I know people who have had kids at 15 - they sure as heck weren't mature before and having a kid didn't make them more mature. It's not so much of a life-changing event that takes place (marriage, kids, etc.), but it is an internal decision to grow up and be responsible. I'd even expand on that some to say taking responsibility for your mistakes and not wanting or giving in to the urge to blame someone else. We all have to be responsible for ourselves in the bill paying, getting fed, housing, etc..... but we all know grown people who still say "wasn't me/my fault" about EVERYTHING that happens to them. I don't find that to be "adult" at all...... There are tons other indicators of immaturity but for me, that's a big one.
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Sept 26, 2013 15:24:59 GMT -5
Taking responsibility for your decisions. A child depends on others to decide where they live, what they eat and how they dress as well as medical choices.
An adult might be handicapped and unable to do things like work but still be an adult.
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busymom
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Post by busymom on Sept 26, 2013 15:27:03 GMT -5
I'm not sure when I BECAME a grown-up, but I remember the first time I felt like one. It was when DH & I bought our first house, & signed the paperwork for that 30-year mortgage.
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Cookies Galore
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Post by Cookies Galore on Sept 26, 2013 15:38:07 GMT -5
It was the moment I turned down another round because I had to get up for work the next morning.
I've since regressed.
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sarcasticgirl
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Post by sarcasticgirl on Sept 26, 2013 15:43:58 GMT -5
I'd like to UN-DO all this adulthood BS...
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Sept 26, 2013 15:47:52 GMT -5
I felt like an adult when I purchased a vaccuum cleaner with my first real paycheck.
Also felt like an adult when we signed the loan papers to get or roof fixed and after setting up DH's IRA.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Sept 26, 2013 16:00:02 GMT -5
When I was sent home from the hospital with a baby in a bucket.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Sept 26, 2013 16:17:57 GMT -5
I suppose the defining moment for me was when I moved several states away to start my first real job after college. Nothing as final as dropping your dad off at the airport and heading back home so you can go to work the next day.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Sept 26, 2013 16:20:03 GMT -5
I felt like an adult when I purchased a vaccuum cleaner with my first real paycheck. Also felt like an adult when we signed the loan papers to get or roof fixed and after setting up DH's IRA. You spent your first paycheck on a vaccuum cleaner? That's not very exciting. However, it is very adult like. Why wasn't your DH setting up his own IRA?
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Sept 26, 2013 16:52:06 GMT -5
When I got a Dyson vacuum fir Christmas andwwas happy about it.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Sept 26, 2013 16:52:33 GMT -5
When I had a 4 day hangover
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Sept 26, 2013 16:56:48 GMT -5
I think being a mature adult has absolutely nothing to do with getting married or having kids. Further proof that you don't have a real marriage :-p
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Sept 26, 2013 16:57:18 GMT -5
When I had a 4 day hangover He didn't ask for proof that you are old!
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Sept 26, 2013 16:58:12 GMT -5
For me, it was when my husband and I moved into our apartment.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Sept 26, 2013 17:12:19 GMT -5
Once both your parents are deceased, you're nobody's baby.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Sept 26, 2013 17:17:03 GMT -5
When I got a Dyson vacuum fir Christmas andwwas happy about it. When I was a kid, I got my mom a mop for Christmas one year. I still get teased about it. I learned at a young age you never get any woman cleaning or cooking stuff for Christmas/birthday, unless she asks for it.
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imawino
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Post by imawino on Sept 26, 2013 17:17:11 GMT -5
When I was sent home from the hospital with a baby in a bucket. I don't have kids - but I'm pretty sure you're supposed to put it in a carseat.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Sept 26, 2013 17:19:10 GMT -5
When I was sent home from the hospital with a baby in a bucket. I don't have kids - but I'm pretty sure you're supposed to put it in a carseat. I thought they wouldn't even let you take the baby home if you didn't have a carseat.
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