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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 16:24:58 GMT -5
Can someone enlist a neighbor for emergency transportation? If she does suddenly need to go buy milk or take a dog to the vet if a neighbor had a copy of her car key they could take her. She could pay them $20 for an hour or less and she may never need them. It's already in place. Maybe you missed my earlier post. She has caregivers for 10 hours per day, 7 days a week. Her LTC pays for them. They can do just about anything she wants except give her meds and clean algae from her fish pond. Yes she's asked them to get in her pond.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Sept 3, 2013 16:26:41 GMT -5
I feel for you and your DH, Bonny, and for MIL, too. This is sooo darned difficult! My father was demented and still driving. Nobody could talk to him. He was stubborn as a mule. He didn't go far (just down to the grocery store - a couple of miles, maybe), but he was downright dangerous. Finally, he ran into the back of a pick-up truck and totaled the car (must have hit it pretty hard). He was fine, and so was the driver of the truck, thankfully. After that, we refused to allow him to get another car. We took them shopping, or wherever they needed to go. Within a year, he was "gone" for all intents and purposes, and confined to a nursing home. He was only there for a few months before he passed. It's a sad thing to deal with.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 16:28:50 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 16:33:52 GMT -5
I feel for you and your DH, Bonny, and for MIL, too. This is sooo darned difficult! My father was demented and still driving. Nobody could talk to him. He was stubborn as a mule. He didn't go far (just down to the grocery store - a couple of miles, maybe), but he was downright dangerous. Finally, he ran into the back of a pick-up truck and totaled the car (must have hit it pretty hard). He was fine, and so was the driver of the truck, thankfully. After that, we refused to allow him to get another car. We took them shopping, or wherever they needed to go. Within a year, he was "gone" for all intents and purposes, and confined to a nursing home. He was only there for a few months before he passed. It's a sad thing to deal with. Yeah, I feel like my compassion for her situation is wearing out. She is just so mean and unhappy. At least we have the POAs so if she does have an accident and winds up in the hospital we probably could move her into assisted living. What an unnecessarily difficult process.
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The Captain
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Post by The Captain on Sept 3, 2013 16:35:46 GMT -5
My Dad had to have "the discussion" with my grandfather (his father in law). We were very lucky in that Grandpa was pretty rational and agreed to give up the keys and give the car to his grandson (my cousin). For him it was a bit of a relief as he knew his reflexes were not what they used to be.
My Dad has already begun to voluntarily restrict his driving (he is 75) to daylight hours only. He was a teamster before he retired so I believe he will quit driving when the time comes. At least I hope so.
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kittensaver
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Post by kittensaver on Sept 3, 2013 17:03:05 GMT -5
Thank God for my mother. She just turned 90 in June. Her license was renewed 6 days before she turned 90. She voluntarily no longer drives the freeways or at night. She takes her car to the grocery store, the doctor and occasional local, daytime errands. But she is still sharp and rational, so she was able to voluntarily make this decision. Thanks mom !
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Sept 3, 2013 17:07:23 GMT -5
Another story: Way back when, I did have medical durable POA for my parents. My Dad had been kept at home thru thick and thin, falls with the accompanying phone call to me that she couldn't get him up, call the the Paramedics were on their way...hurry hurry!. I spent my 30th wedding anniverary at the hospital with her and my Dad after he fell and has a compression fracture of the spine, then transport to another hospital. Total time: 10 hours.
Fast forward: The time came I asserted my legal authority for my Dad. He was moving into a nursing home. He had actually been admitted to the hospital, so the Medicare transfer was easy. My Mom was furious with me. She got some sort of perverted sense of martyrdom by having him home, and people stroked her ego telling her how wonderful she was.
OK, I had just finished my chemo from breast cancer, hair was just barely 1/2" long, I was in this really cool neat outfit (I'd lost 40#s)....and we had to drive to the bank to pick up a bank check to pay for my Dads first month in nursing home.
As I'm driving on a major hiway to the west part of town, my Mom is sitting there sniffing and sniveling. She starts telling me she is going to go home, overdose on drugs by taking everything in the house at once. Sniff sniff, snivel snivel. During this time I'm wondering if I can possibly get her car door open, seat belt unbuckled and her on the side of the road. Sniff sniff, snivel snivel, I'm not going to grandsons wedding, I'm going to take all my pills.....as I'm quietly driving, cool and calm and finally hit the "this is long overdue button" and I simply said " I don't give a good GD what you do"!! Sniff? huh, no sniff, snivel, nope not a snivel.
When we arrived back at the hospital, she told me to let her out, I'm surprised she didn't fly thru the windshield as fast as I stopped. I went up to the floor my Dad was on, and called my attorney brother. His secretary said he was in a meeting, told her I didn't give a damn, get him on the phone. As I explained everything to him, I told him Pop was going to a nursing home that day and I didn't give a rats ass who didn't like it. He politely told me to do what was best. My Dad went to the nursing home, my Mom didn't take the pills, she attended her Grandsons wedding.
Sometimes, as the adult child, you are simply left with no further options.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 3, 2013 17:07:49 GMT -5
That's why I want to move to a town that most things are within walking distance. I have two in mind. Neither have grocery stores but I can cab it once a week with no problem.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Sept 3, 2013 17:13:50 GMT -5
My mother quit driving after she broke her hip. She just didn't feel her reflexes were fast enough for her to be safe for herself, and others. She was easy, and she knew we'd take her anywhere she wanted to go. After my late husband became ill, I did all the driving and, of course, still do. I don't have any problems now, but I'm not a stubborn person, really, so I don't anticipate being a problem when it comes my time to stop driving ... unless dementia takes me. Then, it's anybody's guess, since demented people don't think rationally and each reacts differently. Some become very passive while others become more aggressive.
Mother, at 93, is easy to deal with. She's a bit forgetful now, and short-term memory is starting to go, but it's just she and I and I'm able to deal with it since she's not very mobile. So far, she'll stay put if I run to the grocery for 30 or 45 minutes, and she has her "emergency button" were something to happen. As long as we can maintain that, we're golden. She's able to make her own decisions provided I make sure she's oriented before discussing whatever it is that has to be decided. Still, we set up a durable POA a couple of years ago just in case. I handle all her finances anyway, and know her wishes for end-of-life care.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Sept 3, 2013 17:30:47 GMT -5
My mother quit driving after she broke her hip. She just didn't feel her reflexes were fast enough for her to be safe for herself, and others. She was easy, and she knew we'd take her anywhere she wanted to go. After my late husband became ill, I did all the driving and, of course, still do. I don't have any problems now, but I'm not a stubborn person, really, so I don't anticipate being a problem when it comes my time to stop driving ... unless dementia takes me. Then, it's anybody's guess, since demented people don't think rationally and each reacts differently. Some become very passive while others become more aggressive. Mother, at 93, is easy to deal with. She's a bit forgetful now, and short-term memory is starting to go, but it's just she and I and I'm able to deal with it since she's not very mobile. So far, she'll stay put if I run to the grocery for 30 or 45 minutes, and she has her "emergency button" were something to happen. As long as we can maintain that, we're golden. She's able to make her own decisions provided I make sure she's oriented before discussing whatever it is that has to be decided. Still, we set up a durable POA a couple of years ago just in case. I handle all her finances anyway, and know her wishes for end-of-life care.She is fortunate to have you....
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 17:33:14 GMT -5
I'm sorry you and L are dealing w this Bonny. There was an issue with DH's dad and his driving but for the life of my I can't remember what it is. But he was very easygoing and when DH told him you need to stop driving, he did it immediately. Nothing sinister, he never hurt anybody. I seem to remember that he fell getting out of the car, and couldn't get up again. He was found and helped by a young new neighbor, and if I remember correctly, when DH told him that, his dad gave her the car.
I really don't blame them as a lot of the driving centers around tasks associated with the three dogs; e.g. vet, grooming et cetera. I wouldn't want all that dog hair in my car either!
Given that your MIL is very comfortable financially, could you (or your DH) arrange for the groomer and vet to do house calls? I know that this doesn't solve the entire problem, but at least it would minimize your MIL's "need" to drive, and buy you guys some time.
Maybe I'm nuts but some docs / vets still do house calls here ... especially for their elderly, long-time clients. I know my vet makes house calls for her clients who have trouble bringing their animals to her. I don't know if groomers do.
This said, Bonny, unfortunately it sounds like things are accelerating, and the decisions will only get harder.
Story: my BFF and I grew up in the same apt building in Queens. Everybody of that "group" died (including my parents) and her mom was the last one left (she still is). My BFF lives in Fairfield CT. As her mom got older and worst (but no driving lol) her mom (who is like my second mom) used to call her 4 or 5 times a week with "disasters". At the end, it was, my eye fell out (she has had two corneal transplants) and I can't find it. Several times a week. My friend would drive from CT to NY like a bat out of hell. For YEARS, she'd hired caretakers, her mom would fire them. My friend would pay them extra to ignore her mom and stay, her mom would pay them even more to go. So L would hire somebody else. And they went on and on and on like that, for years.
After a while my BFF couldn't take it anymore, and had her put in a fantastic home in Fairfield. Her mom had always flat-out refused to go there. She went there kicking and screaming, my BFF told her it's temporary, just so you're close to us for a little while.
Her mom LOVES it there!!! She is very social (probably unlike your MIL) and she is kind. She has tons of friends there. Nobody could ever have predicted that based on her prior behavior / attitude.
Other thought: if your MIL refuses to go into assisted living, would she consider downsizing? And / or moving closer to you? And / or somewhere slightly more urban / suburban?
I'm not sure how feasible that would be but it might be a "first step" she could live with, to get rid of the huge house and garden and pond, etc. Especially if she's confronted with the choice between that and assisted living. It also might be a "first step" towards getting her into a facility near where you live, rather than where she lives. I know that's not a cheap option but I'm guessing that isn't the main concern right now.
Hugs Bonny!
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Sept 3, 2013 17:33:38 GMT -5
There really should be some mechanism by which this can be addressed. My mom had emergency open heart so I was able to take her keys and told her she needs tovbe evaluated by a Dr. Before driving again. She never drove again. Prior to that she was deteriorating. I told her she could no longer drive the kids but then she got very defiant and would take them out. At that point I realized she could not even sit with the kids even for a short time because I couldno longer trust her judgment. It is a difficult and uncomfortable position.
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mmhmm
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Post by mmhmm on Sept 3, 2013 17:34:16 GMT -5
I feel like I'm really lucky to have her, GG. We've both lost our husbands and have found a mooring in one another. My kids are great and are close-by, so it's not like we're alone. Still, it's great to have her here with me.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Sept 3, 2013 18:03:13 GMT -5
There really should be some mechanism by which this can be addressed. My mom had emergency open heart so I was able to take her keys and told her she needs tovbe evaluated by a Dr. Before driving again. She never drove again. Prior to that she was deteriorating. I told her she could no longer drive the kids but then she got very defiant and would take them out. At that point I realized she could not even sit with the kids even for a short time because I couldno longer trust her judgment. It is a difficult and uncomfortable position. As the boomer generation ages, this is going to become more and more an issue... It does need to be addressed...
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 18:03:37 GMT -5
We have tried. She won't move.
First excuse is economic. She can sell her 3000 sq.ft. home in an upper middle class neighborhood in the greater Portland area for around $500k-550k and buy a 1300 sq.ft. house in our middle class town for about $700k. Also most of her very generous ($10k/mth) federal pension is untaxed by OR. CA will tax it.
As previously discussed, her NW, including her house, is about $1M. She has LTC which is covering not only her caregivers but also housekeeping and a lot of her gardening expenses.
Given that she's in stage 4 renal failure a rational person would ask, why is she so worried about saving money? And the answer is <drum roll please> she's saving it for DH. -faint-I think we need an icon with emoticon playing a violin. I hate martyrs.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Sept 3, 2013 18:09:14 GMT -5
It is such a loss of independence that it scares them. But who should address this ? Should doctors do screenings or testing by the DMV or a hot line or what? And even if you think you should take the keys you may not be able to legally remove them from a competent adult.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 18:13:30 GMT -5
Bonny as you know I'm not very familiar with that area. I just looked at Google maps to see where both cities were in relation to each other, and to the state line.
I agree, her argument is silly, because you and DH don't need or want her money.
Does she have any contacts in OR near the state border? It would lessen the distance for you guys, and still keep her in OR. It's gorgeous there!!!
We have tried. She won't move.
At some point, she may have to. She is darn lucky that her son / your DH is retired. But even he can't keep this up long term with all these crises. I'm NOT telling you to railroad her now, it doesn't sound like she is at that point yet (about moving, I mean. She probably is about the driving.) But, it seems to be going in that direction.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 18:16:42 GMT -5
She can sell her 3000 sq.ft. home in an upper middle class neighborhood in the greater Portland area for around $500k-550k and buy a 1300 sq.ft. house in our middle class town for about $700k.
Thinking again ... would she be willing to do that? If so, maybe that's the best option right now. And you guys "take on" all or part of her mortgage.
This said, you probably wouldn't want her "on your doorstep". So maybe a place an hour or 90 min away (instead of six) would be cheaper.
Perhaps this might be an avenue worth exploring?
My BFF kept her mom's condo. I'm pretty sure she STILL has it, per her mom's instructions, "for when she gets better and can move back home". But in the meantime, my BFF has a life again, and she's not driving back and forth between CT and Queens at the speed of light and having a heart attack 3 or 4 times a week because she thinks her mom's eyeballs are rolling around on the floor.
Win-win, even if it's not the cheapest option.
ETA: Given that she's in stage 4 renal failure a rational person would ask, why is she so worried about saving money? And the answer is <drum roll please> she's saving it for DH. -faint-I think we need an icon with emoticon playing a violin. I hate martyrs.
Bonny, she's not all that rational. This said, I think it is human nature to want to "leave something" to one's kids, and that she is too selfish and short-sighted to realize that although she "means well", she risks doing you both in in the process. But you may do better moving forward by "accepting her gift" (or the idea of her gift), thanking her, and then making plans while taking that into account. IOW, coming to SOME sort of compromise that she can live with.
You explain why she won't move NEAR YOU (taxes, higher COLA, etc). But maybe you can convince her to give up the huge house / garden / pond and downsize NEAR HER. That would probably already save you a ton of lost sleep, although I agree it is not exactly the cheap option, since it sounds like she is going downhill quite quickly and it would probably be a temporary fix.
But nobody can predict how long that "temporary fix" could last.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2013 19:18:40 GMT -5
Debt,
I've been looking for houses for her off and on for the last 6 months. I think we're at the point that something major has to happen and then it's time for her to go into assisted living near us if she survives. She really cannot live on her own. And if slipping and falling and lying in her pond for a couple of hours a few months ago until some passer-byers heard her calling after she fired one of her caregivers didn't scare the cr*p out of her to relocate nothing will.
Even though we have the POAs, I don't think we can put her in assisted living against her will unless her doctor says so or she's declared incompetent by the Court and we establish a conservatorship. I really don't want to go through that process unless I really have to.
And BTW the "inheritance issue" is also used as a weapon. Supposedly the only reason DH is interested in helping her is so that we can sell her house and take her money.
This isn't a job for sissies!
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Sharon
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Post by Sharon on Sept 3, 2013 19:36:06 GMT -5
<<< Disclaimer Grandpa gave up his car about 4-5 years ago >>> My Grandpa will turn 100 at the beginning of October. His driver's license expires then. He wants my Mom to take him to DMV and get it renewed. Even though he no longer owns a car and hasn't driven for 4-5 years he wants to have his drivers license. I'm sure the DMV people will love to see him walking through the door with his walker and oxygen. When he turned 92 DMV made him have the doctor sign off on his driving privileges. We were hoping that the doctor would suggest that he stop driving. Instead the doctor just asked if he was having any problems driving when Grandpa said no doctor signed the form.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Sept 3, 2013 21:51:22 GMT -5
Dad willingly gave up driving when we moved them to independent living. He knew he couldn't drive in a new town. He was only driving in the town where he had grown up before. He kept saying he couldn't find his way around the new town where he now lives.
Dnephew1 has the car. Every week, Dad tells me he misses seeing it. I remind him that it's an expensive toy to just sit there to look at.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Sept 4, 2013 9:05:52 GMT -5
We have tried. She won't move
My dad is trying to have this conversation with his mom. We live 35-40 minutes away and my grandfather has had brain surgery THREE times, chemo, radiation and his mobility is somewhat limited due to damage from the tumor/surgery. He's fallen several times and my grandmother calls my dad expecting him to come out and help. It's happened enough that the Treynor volunteer fire department said they'd come, at no charge, to help. They've been in a wreck driving to my great uncle's pizza parlor in Millard because my grandamother won't stop working there. My dad got my grandfather convinced to not drive anymore, but does my grandmother stop working? NOOOOOOOOOO she calls my half blind great uncle to drive out to Treynor (and he freaking does it) and expects my dad to drive her home at midnight! Meanwhile my grandfather is at home, alone. What if something happens? None of us can get there in time and Treynor doesn't have a hospital. He doesn't have a life alert so what if he can't reach a phone? GAH! We've tried blackmailing her by pointing out that if she moves back here they can see Gwen more, which my grandfather has expressed desire for. Nope, CB property prices aren't a good deal compared to Treynor. My maternal grandmother didn't do this with my mom. When grandpad died she agreed to sell the large house and moved in across the street, which is where I currently live. But she fought my mom all the way till the end on taking care of her estate and it was a HUGE f-ing mess when she died. I told my mom PLEASE PLEASE don't be this obnoxious when you get old! At leaset I have a brother to help me out. My parents are only children, the entire burden is on them.
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midwestlily
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Post by midwestlily on Sept 4, 2013 9:35:47 GMT -5
I likely would win the award for the worst daughter ever....but this is my story: 1.5 years ago my Mom fell in her apt. Naturally she broke her hip. She lived in Nebraska (largest city). We live in NW Arkansas, my older brother had just moved to Florida, our son lives in second largest city in Nebr. My Dh and I drove to Nebraska the next day, I did not have her POA or any medical directives. She was in the hospital, my DB was not coming back, our son had all necessary legal papers. So, we sit thru the surgery, and at some point the social worker for the hospital was talking to me about her after care, I said we need to do rehab etc. and at that point the young lady said " do you have POA"....I looked around & over my shoulder and back at her and not so politely said " I'm her daughter, you see anyone else around here". Sw got my point. I faced the same scenario at the rehab nursing facility. During this time in the hospital, thanks to Xanax, my DH and I started emptying her apt., we sold her car to a man who worked at the apt. complex, got her into rehab, started work on Medicade (my older brother is an attorney, so I was able to turn all that over to him. At the time of her release from rehab, we had rented her apt. in city where son lives, in a assisted living facility, I had bought all new furnishings and even saved her favorties from the apt. . DH and I drove back to Nebraska, picked her up from rehab, took her to lunch at Olive Garden, and then onto her new apt. in assisted living. She had absolutely NO SAY in anything, when she did bitch about not having her car I told her she was lucky her family let her drive as long as she did. Yes, I'm the bitch, she's happy in the apt. (she's now 93) our DIL does her shopping for her, our son takes her to lunch, the grandkids come to visit etc. Sometimes, you have NO OPTION except to put your foot down and say ENOUGH!!!!! This is exactly what my aunt and uncle did with my grandmother when she was in her nineties. While she was in the hospital (from a fall, but no surgery or anything of that sort) they cleaned out her apartment, took whatever she needed to an assisted living facility, and took her straight there when she was released from the hospital. Two cousins helped them with cleaning out the apartment. Yes, my grandmother was angry, but for some reason she decided to blame the cousins. To the end of her days (a couple years later) she grumbled about how Cousin Joanne had "stolen" things from her.
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Works4me
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Post by Works4me on Sept 4, 2013 16:50:32 GMT -5
Have been kicking this around in my head for several hours and all I can say is it is a difficult situation but one that has to be handled.
My father went from living independently and driving(not well but legally) to total care following surgery in less than a month. His right corodid artery was found to be occluded and a stint was placed - however he never recovered his balance to walk without assistance and his safety judgement was seriously compromised. He refused to admit that he was unable to drive and it was quite a battle.
It started with him grabbing my arm and forcefully twisting it the first time I refused to give him the keys and allow him to drive - prior to this he had NEVER laid a hand on me. I called the police on him and they were able to talk to him but it was a recurring situation that was never fully resolved. I kept the keys in my purse and to this day he even plan his escape from the care facility - lol.
Her doctor can back you but many are unwilling to battle this out with a patient beyond completing a DMV form. By calling the police they can forbid her to drive until DMV re-tests her and may even be willing/able to submit an expedited request.
I have seen families place a Club mechanism on the steering wheel which may disuade your MIL but knew of one guy who broke the thing off. Hiding keys in the house seldom works because they have nothing else to do but search for them. Some home care companies can pass them from caregiver to caregiver but that depends on the company.
With regards to your MIL, the only thing I can think of is for you to be a total hard-a$$ and take the keys away from her - maybe you could do it rather than your DH - kind of playing her off between the two of you? Either way, the police and DMV could and should be involved - after all, it is their job to stop impaired drivers.
To me, here is the bottom line: she is refusing to be cooperative and realistic, thus resulting in her declining situation. Even a serious fall failed to get her attention and it looks as if her choices will force her into long term care in the near future. You have done and are continuing to do all that you can to help her but she is refusing to gracefully accept any limitations. People have the right to self determination and her refusal to compromise is what is creating this situation. It is not pleasant but the reality is she can no longer safely exercise her driving privilege and must be stopped from harming others.
For me the hardest part was that I had never raised children and taking care of my father was like that in reverse. The main difference for us was that we had a healthy relationship and prior to his illness, he was always good to me and my late mother. One of the last times he fell, after I told him not to stand up, he said, "I am the father, you are the daughter - I tell you, not the other way around." This clarified it in my mind that no matter what he would never accept limits from me the way he does from his caregivers, thus making placement necessary.
Kudos to you and DH for taking care of her and for continuing to want the best for her despite her extreme shortcomings and difficult personality.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 4, 2013 17:37:29 GMT -5
The update from DH last night was that the caregiver observed someone taking down her plate from the construction site. I'm sure that will have been reported to ODOT. My guess is that if DH has a decent conversation with her doctor next week that the combination of the report and the doctor even filling out a form will force at least a re-testing of MIL.
DH reports that she's actually doing better physically but he doubts that she could even pass a written test given where her mind is.
Thanks everyone for sharing your stories and stay tuned for the next chapter!
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Works4me
Senior Member
Someone responded to your personal ad - a German Shepherd named Tara wants to have you for dinner...
Joined: May 5, 2012 12:11:37 GMT -5
Posts: 2,553
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Post by Works4me on Sept 4, 2013 17:45:51 GMT -5
Forgot to add one other suggestion: booze! Lots of it and often!
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:35:58 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 4, 2013 19:16:43 GMT -5
Forgot to add one other suggestion: booze! Lots of it and often! LOL, that's my problem! I stopped drinking for a month to kick off my hike training program. Only.four.more days!
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Works4me
Senior Member
Someone responded to your personal ad - a German Shepherd named Tara wants to have you for dinner...
Joined: May 5, 2012 12:11:37 GMT -5
Posts: 2,553
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Post by Works4me on Sept 4, 2013 21:21:17 GMT -5
Yeah - I don't like the way alcohol makes me feel when combined with my lupus meds but I still really love the idea!
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 7, 2024 4:35:58 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 7, 2013 23:08:47 GMT -5
I thought I would copy my post from the insurance thread here:
I have the feeling that she hasn't told us about a few fender benders and is worried that her insurance co may drop her.
Also her Physical Therapist is quitting since MIL is refusing to do her exercises. When the therapist was there on Thursday she wouldn't participate and just played with her dogs. When the therapist started packing up her stuff after 20 MIL got really aggressive and told her that she gets paid for a full hour. Therapist told her that she (the therapist) needs to focus on clients who want to get better.
DH walked the therapist to the car and got the name of a driving instructor who tests elderly patients. And the therapist is sending a mental health therapist to evaluate MIL next week.
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Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 64,494
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Post by Tennesseer on Sept 7, 2013 23:50:14 GMT -5
No advice, just sympathy. It's REALLY hard to get someone's licesned revoked and even then if they have a car they can still drive. My great aunt just lost her license two years ago despite being completely blind in one eye and legally blind in the other before that. She had my cousin navigate from the passenger seat. WTF is wrong with our DMV?! Got you beat. My mom had full blown Alzheimer's Disease. She couldn't find her way out of a paperbag. My dad had lost part of his vision due to stroke. My dad would have my mother drive their RV! And just like your great aunt would have her cousin navigate from the passenger seat, so did my dad navigate for my mom. "Helen-don't ask questions. When I say turn left, turn left.....Turn left.....NOW!" When we kids found that out, the keys to their RV and autos were pulled.
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