Phoenix84
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 17, 2011 21:42:35 GMT -5
Posts: 10,056
|
Post by Phoenix84 on Jul 23, 2013 10:47:11 GMT -5
Hmmmm, it appears making a SUCH AS list was a mistake. Many took what were meant to be examples as a literal list of people who could respond to the thread. Note to self, don't do that in the future.
|
|
Regis
Well-Known Member
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 12:26:50 GMT -5
Posts: 1,415
|
Post by Regis on Jul 23, 2013 11:09:57 GMT -5
It is nice to be recognized for my success. My secret is to read a lot of posts and be very selective about the ones I respond to. I only respond to posts which I feel I can answer with an equal mix of humor and truth. I like the humor be upfront, but then the truth comes through in the back end. I also like to keep my responses succinct. My responses have been called "one liners" but I consider that a crude description of my posts in which every word is chosen carefully and I try not to include any fluff. And that's how I have become a successful YM poster. (That is what we are talking about, correct? I am not sure there is much else I have been successful at in life.) So...this is the humor part upfront?
|
|
swamp
Community Leader
THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 16:03:22 GMT -5
Posts: 45,617
|
Post by swamp on Jul 23, 2013 11:16:12 GMT -5
so, I was thinking about this last night.
various parts of my success appear to be chlorinated water, torture at the hands of older siblings, beer, diet pepsi, and chocolate.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 11:17:26 GMT -5
Shiny objects and misdirection!
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 11:24:41 GMT -5
Serious question, what do you consider "a success at life"? I'm not giving you a hard time. I really want to know how you define it.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 11:53:24 GMT -5
Hmmmm, it appears making a SUCH AS list was a mistake. Many took what were meant to be examples as a literal list of people who could respond to the thread. Note to self, don't do that in the future. Your choice of examples made it hard to know if I measured up.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 13:01:00 GMT -5
What's the secret to your success?
Work hard. Marry the right person. Spend less than you earn. Invest. Be lucky. Don't be stupid. Hate paying interest. Hate paying payments.
Pretty simple except for the "Don't be stupid". People have a natural leaning toward doing stupid stuff.
|
|
souldoubt
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 4, 2011 11:57:14 GMT -5
Posts: 2,756
|
Post by souldoubt on Jul 23, 2013 13:13:51 GMT -5
Over the years I saved some info from the old MSN boards and from posts here based on the topic and/or poster. I saved a word doc of advice someone gave 5+ years ago (file last edited May 2008) from the MSN boards but I don't recall who the poster was at this point. Some of it I wasn't as big on so I've removed it. Just to point out before some posters dissect it this isn't my advice but here goes:
1. The definition of LUCK is taking full advantage of an opportunity. 2. Tell me who you are with, and I will tell you who you are. 3. The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm. 4. If you want to be an Eagle, you have to fly with Eagles. 5. Take responsibility FOR YOURSELF. 6. Listen to people who have done it. 7. At a young age do more listening than talking and stop thinking you know it all. YOU DON’T 8. You don't need a college education, but you need to further your education. 9. your old buddies who are going nowhere, and rub elbows with people who can enhance your life. 10. Have respect and consideration for your self and everyone you meet. 11. AND MY FAVORITE... The formula for success is the same for every one; the only variable is DISCIPLINE. Take charge of your life. 12. Marry for potential of your partner, not sex. 13. Spend the $200.00 to $400.00 an hour to hire professional advice. ( CPA, ESTATE ATTORNEY, FINANCE PROFESSIONAL) and whoever else you need for great advice. 14. Between 25 and 55 years of age are your income producing years. This is when you better make your fortune. 15. The reason poor people stay poor is because they don't own any appreciating ASSETS. Get to work and start to invest. 16. Don't borrow money for anything that does not appreciate in value.
|
|
vonna
Well-Known Member
Joined: Aug 11, 2012 15:58:51 GMT -5
Posts: 1,249
|
Post by vonna on Jul 23, 2013 13:22:16 GMT -5
12. Marry for potential of your partner, not sex. I was pretty much agreeing up to this point. Change the "not" to "and" !!!
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 23, 2013 13:51:39 GMT -5
Zib, LOL!!
I worked hard, paid my bills on time, did really well with real estate, etc. but I think my biggest secret to my success was that I married well and I have great money management skills. I also read a lot. Especially financial literature when I was in my early 20's and actually followed a lot of the advice given. Thank you USAA!!
|
|
Cookies Galore
Senior Associate
I don't need no instructions to know how to rock
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 18:08:13 GMT -5
Posts: 10,891
|
Post by Cookies Galore on Jul 23, 2013 14:40:10 GMT -5
12. Marry for potential of your partner, not sex. I was pretty much agreeing up to this point. Change the "not" to "and" !!! Yup! I'm marrying for the potential of more sex!
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 15:02:24 GMT -5
DH and I just hit the huge milestone of 1mm in net worth. I felt successful until I read this post.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 23, 2013 15:05:47 GMT -5
If I told you it wouldn't be a secret no more and then everyone would be a success
|
|
imawino
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 22:58:16 GMT -5
Posts: 5,370
|
Post by imawino on Jul 23, 2013 15:43:27 GMT -5
The secret to my success is being just generally awesome! And I think it is important to know when to give a fuck and when (like Honey Badger) to not give a fuck.
|
|
sarcasticgirl
Junior Associate
Joined: Jan 4, 2011 14:39:51 GMT -5
Posts: 5,155
Location: Chicago
|
Post by sarcasticgirl on Jul 23, 2013 15:59:30 GMT -5
my secret to success is having a great rack and a sparkling personality.
|
|
shanendoah
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 19:44:48 GMT -5
Posts: 10,096
Mini-Profile Name Color: 0c3563
|
Post by shanendoah on Jul 23, 2013 16:43:29 GMT -5
1) Know your worth 2) Don't settle 3) Always strive, in the words of my WoW guild, to "Do Better"
|
|
tskeeter
Junior Associate
Joined: Mar 20, 2011 19:37:45 GMT -5
Posts: 6,831
|
Post by tskeeter on Jul 23, 2013 18:27:00 GMT -5
Luck is what happens when preparation bumps into opportunity.
|
|
tskeeter
Junior Associate
Joined: Mar 20, 2011 19:37:45 GMT -5
Posts: 6,831
|
Post by tskeeter on Jul 23, 2013 18:36:05 GMT -5
What's the secret to your success? Work hard. Marry the right person. Spend less than you earn. Invest. Be lucky. Don't be stupid. Hate paying interest. Hate paying payments. Pretty simple except for the "Don't be stupid". People have a natural leaning toward doing stupid stuff. But, but, but, Tex, "don't be stupid" is the most important part. At least, don't be stupid too often. Kept me from pursuing a long career in retail. Kept me from marrying an alcoholic spendthrift with emotional problems (she was attractive, though). Kept me from buying a car the preceeding lady could drive (and wreck). Kept me from spending all my money on sports cars and speeding tickets. Kept me from buying a floating money pit (sail boat).
|
|
Apple
Junior Associate
Always travel with a sense of humor
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 15:51:04 GMT -5
Posts: 9,938
Mini-Profile Name Color: dc0e29
|
Post by Apple on Jul 23, 2013 23:48:14 GMT -5
Wow, mentioned in the OP (and really, I feel like an invisible poster most the time, so it's a pleasant surprise).
I'm exhausted tonight, sorry if it's a bit of a ramble. Those who have read some of my posts in the past know some more of my background--single mom, went to college full time while working 30+ hours a week, avoiding cc debt--except when I could get it interest free, home owner at 19 (then-husband was 20, he came into the marriage with less than $80 to his name, the money in savings was my "lifetime" savings), worked since I was in 5th grade when I got my first job as a paperboy.
I grew up in a middle class family, but once I hit Jr. High, if I wanted something "extra" I had to come up with the money myself. I went to an Oregon Institute of Technology competition in 8th grade--the only money I had was money I raised working the concessions stand as a fundraiser, baby sitting, and doing my paper route. My parents didn't spend a dime on it. Same through high school.
I was truly a middle child. The other kids got things bought for them, got to play sports (there was no money to pay for me to play sports), got to go to the doctor when they were sick (I had my ear bleeding for two days straight. I did finally get to stay home from school, but did not get to go to the doctor. Sister went if she almost had a fever...)
So, I didn't grow up poor, but I wasn't spoiled (hell, I didn't even feel cared about), I didn't get any real "advantage" other than getting to go to school and not being hungry. Parents didn't pay for college, and I was out of the house two weeks after I graduated HS.
So, my main "secrets":
We all screw up (I got pregnant before I graduated high school...) Key is, don't screw up the same way twice. Learn your lesson, move on. Don't use the screw-ups as an excuse, that will only hold you back in the future. Use that screw-up and the consequences to also help you avoid more screw-ups. Accept responsibility, avoid trying to place blame.
It may not be "your fault", but if it affects you, you still have to deal with it. There comes a point where it just doesn't matter whose fault it is, you're stuck with fixing it if it's going to hold you down.
The right spouse helps, definitely. But you can still do it even if you picked wrong. If you're single, realize asap that it's better to remain single than be with the wrong person. Even if that wrong person has lots of money, is it worth the misery?
Don't play the victim, don't blame everything/everyone else. I have been discriminated against at work because I am female. I've been held back, I've been screwed with, I've had a boss out to get me because I didn't sleep with him. I made sure I was damn good at my job. I went the extra steps, I went out of my way to help other people (who now go out of their way to help me), I stayed above reproach. My boss may have hated me, but I made sure he never had anything valid to complain about.
Have a plan B. And C. And D, E, and F just in case the first several don't work out.
Don't give up. It's tempting. More than once I have just wanted to walk away from everything, curl up, and cry. Instead, I throw myself a one-night pity party then plan my attack and don't wallow in the bad feelings.
Do what it takes to better your position in life. Go to school if it will help you get a better career. Yes, it sucks. You sacrifice, and you're broke, and it's hard, but sometimes that's just what you have to do. And if you do it, you'll get there a lot faster than you will if you just complain about it.
When someone says you "can't", find a way to prove them wrong. Don't let them convince you they are right just because they say so.
Maybe it shouldn't be a surprise that my favorite waterfall is hard to get to. You have to climb over a logjam. You have to wade through cold water up to your chest. You get bruised and scratched and cold and wet. But then you see the walls open up some and the view is worth it all. And you go back and do it again later. But if you look at the logjam and decide it's too daunting, too hard, not worth the risk or the pain, the only way you can hope to see that waterfall is in a photograph that someone else takes.
Wow, that was long...
ETA: my son was my biggest "screw up", but, he's also been my biggest motivator to succeed. I can't fail him. I have to do the absolute best I can do so that he is safe, provided for, gets a few perks--like travel, and has a brighter future. I can't be a statistic. I don't know that I'd have had the drive I have if I didn't have someone else relying on me 100%.
|
|
cronewitch
Junior Associate
I identify as a post-menopausal childless cat lady and I vote.
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:44:20 GMT -5
Posts: 5,979
|
Post by cronewitch on Jul 24, 2013 3:34:45 GMT -5
Do what most people won't for 5 years and you can live like most people can't for life. I heard that once and it seems true. Most people increase lifestyle as soon as they can, only work one job, get into some lifestyle debt and don't go to school full time while working full time.
The rich get richer and the poor get poorer so you need to cross the line and get away from the line.
I put in my hard years after my divorce. I bought a house I wasn't sure I could afford and sent every cent I could to the mortgage company. I scrimped on things like heat that would have been nice to have. I took a roommate and sent in that money too. After 4 years in the house I went to school full time while working full time for two more years to get a BA. Seven years after I got the house it only had a 5K mortgage my mortgage payment was $103, rental income $300 so all of my income was mine. I sold the house at almost double what I paid and got a bigger house more than 3 times as expensive as the first. I was able to pay a good down payment, invest some in stocks and pay off the garage and it's land from the sale.
So after less than 10 years post divorce I had fully funded an IRA each year, had other investments and a pretty expensive home, 5 boats and income twice or more what it was when I got divorced. I raised the rent on the tenant when I moved, he moved with me.
Now nearly 30 years post divorce my mortgage is small, credit rating over 800, income over 80K, investments 760K, roommate is still with me and paying me rent.
Those first few years were hard, lots of overtime, scrimping and saving and long hard hours of school, homework, work and CPA exam but now I am living a middle class or better lifestyle. I could go spend money on a bigger boat or nicer home or anything I want thanks to crossing the line to getting richer. My investment income this year so far is over 100K but won't always be that high. Even at 4% I will have income of SS 24K, investment of 30K, rental income 10K so able to retire in comfort not poverty. If I get 11% returns I will get richer and richer as I age not fixed income with inflation making me poorer.
Most people aren't willing to work hard, not spend, invest even before basics so end up low income elderly. I didn't do much more after the first 5 years and have been living middle class for a long time. I wish I had buckled down at 18 and done the hard work but I was young, broke and instead got married at 19 to a loser so only got two years of college pre divorce.
|
|
Otto the Orange
Well-Known Member
Go Orange!
Joined: Aug 23, 2012 4:20:52 GMT -5
Posts: 1,284
|
Post by Otto the Orange on Jul 24, 2013 3:58:45 GMT -5
|
|
vonna
Well-Known Member
Joined: Aug 11, 2012 15:58:51 GMT -5
Posts: 1,249
|
Post by vonna on Jul 24, 2013 8:29:58 GMT -5
DH and I just hit the huge milestone of 1mm in net worth. I felt successful until I read this post. Congratulations!!
|
|
Bob Ross
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 14:48:03 GMT -5
Posts: 5,883
|
Post by Bob Ross on Jul 24, 2013 9:43:15 GMT -5
I'm particularly interested in hearing from our very successful posters, such as wrongsideof30, Swamp, Archiethedragon, MidJD, Miss Taquila, and Apple. Archie's success was based on sponging off the folks until he was 30, and never ever doing anything fun. Swamp realized quite early that there was big bucks to be made by setting murderers free.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2013 9:53:29 GMT -5
DH and I just hit the huge milestone of 1mm in net worth. I felt successful until I read this post. Congratulations!! Thanks Vonna. We are "only" 40 so DH is feeling pretty good about things. Me being a pessimist, I think we should have more!!!
|
|
thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,763
|
Post by thyme4change on Jul 24, 2013 10:00:00 GMT -5
I think in making an effort to be thankful for all the advantages I was lucky enough to be born with and to be less harsh to people who weren't given the same advantages I think I disassociated myself with any success I have had. I think my kids were born with easy going personalities, and that is why they are great kids - not because I strive to keep a consistent, happy home with appropriate rules and consequences. I think I did well at work because I was born smarter than average (not brilliant) and I happen to be good at certain things, not because I worked for years to develop those skills and am willing to do the work to apply those skills to make the people I support at work happy and better at business. I think my marriage is great because my husband is nice, not because I keep his happiness in mind and have worked tirelessly to give him the opportunities to grow and be who he wants to be.
I think I need to start bragging more. I guess I would rather be a successful douchebag than a depressed has been.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2013 10:51:48 GMT -5
wow, I am REALLY feeling unsuccessful now. Leave it to YM(OT) to knock me back to reality!
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2013 10:59:13 GMT -5
STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS JEN!!!!!
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2013 11:01:34 GMT -5
I'm particularly interested in hearing from our very successful posters, such as wrongsideof30, Swamp, Archiethedragon, MidJD, Miss Taquila, and Apple. Archie's success was based on sponging off the folks until he was 30, and never ever doing anything fun. Swamp realized quite early that there was big bucks to be made by setting murderers free. Wow. Someone does pay attention.... a little scary.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 18:33:04 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2013 11:28:01 GMT -5
I think he's crushing on you, Arch.
|
|
Apple
Junior Associate
Always travel with a sense of humor
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 15:51:04 GMT -5
Posts: 9,938
Mini-Profile Name Color: dc0e29
|
Post by Apple on Jul 24, 2013 11:44:31 GMT -5
I think everyone needs to define their own "successful".
I'm successful in some areas, and I really believe I am. However, some people think I'm a complete failure, and well, let them think it. I'm a failure to old teachers and my parents because I didn't go to med school like I wanted and become a great doctor. Instead, I was stupid and got pregnant, and now I'll "never live up to my potential".
I'm a failure to some of my bosses and coworkers, because I don't kiss-butt to get a promotion. The two people I have "lost" a promotion to are both pretty good at sucking up. That's not me, I'm here to do my job and be dang good at it, not being condescending or a preema-donna (crap, how do you spell that?), and doing the right things the right way, even if it's more difficult or challenging. I don't just say "yes" when my boss wants, I have my own ideas, and if I think what he wants to do is illogical or unsafe, I speak up with my own idea. Some bosses are cool with that, some aren't. The crews that don't do the sucking up and politics like mine see me as one of them, and as a "success", while my own crew sees that standing your ground (hey, put my life on the line and you bet I'm going to stand my ground) is more of a struggle, so they go the "yes man" route and see me as a failure for not doing it that way.
I ams seen as a failure because I was a "teen mom". I'm seen as a failure because I'm divorced. I'm seen as a failure for hundreds of reasons.
I'm also seen as a success story.
It's all confusing. I'm the one who determines if my life is a success. And I've decided it is, even if it's had some stumbles and falls and drawbacks.
MUP--you've got a large net worth. See yourself as successful. I don't see anything here that says you aren't.
Jen--you've gone to school, and work, and have a kid, and have a house, and are putting work into your marriage. There is nothing unsuccessful about any of that.
I had to go fix a problem for the head office woman today. This was my first contact with her (she's new). I fixed her problem within two minutes of walking into the office building. Instead of just a "thanks", she was a total bitch to me. She said next time it happened, she'd just have "x" fix it. I tried to explain if it happened again, we may have to run a new circuit in her office, but that we could do that. Instead, she treated me like crap, looked down on me, was completely disrepectful, and all I had done was SOLVE her problem. Wow. I don't care what position she holds, how much she thinks she runs the place. I walked out of there with no respect for her. None. I don't care how fast she's climbed the ladder or "who" she is, I do not see success. I see a b*tch.
|
|