thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,510
|
Post by thyme4change on Apr 29, 2013 9:43:29 GMT -5
I worked at one company where there was a high population of mormons and nobody swore (well, a bunch of people did, but you had to do it very, very quietly - and look over your shoulder first.) It was weird because everyone else I have worked, cursing is acceptable.
|
|
justme
Senior Associate
Joined: Feb 10, 2012 13:12:47 GMT -5
Posts: 14,618
|
Post by justme on Apr 29, 2013 9:44:08 GMT -5
I very rarely swear. And with some folks that makes me a freak of nature. But honestly people that swear as a regular part of their communication are just not that bright and have no class. Coaches fall into that category, brawn but not much brain. As far as I know they can't use that language until the kids are university age. Sometimes an "F-bomb" conveys what I'm feeling more succinctly than any other word in the English language. ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/idunno.gif) ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/yeahthat.gif) Plus it's just a fun word to say - in all variations.
|
|
Green Eyed Lady
Senior Associate
Look inna eye! Always look inna eye!
Joined: Jan 23, 2012 11:23:55 GMT -5
Posts: 19,629
|
Post by Green Eyed Lady on Apr 29, 2013 9:45:49 GMT -5
Cursing is acceptable at my office as long as only office staff overhears. If we ever hire anyone who is offended by it, we'd have to stop swearing. Not a big thing for me since I rarely curse, but I have been known to drop the F bomb when someone does something stupid and it requires that I do a bunch of work to fix it.
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,719
|
Post by midjd on Apr 29, 2013 9:58:24 GMT -5
I worked at one company where there was a high population of mormons and nobody swore (well, a bunch of people did, but you had to do it very, very quietly - and look over your shoulder first.) It was weird because everyone else I have worked, cursing is acceptable. One of my roller derby teammates is a Mormon and she has cautioned us (and the coach) on our language many times. It's always a little awkward, because we're all adults, our practices are closed, and sometimes there's no better way to get your point across than to yell "Hit a bitch!" Moderate cursing is accepted at my workplace, unless you're giving a speech or in a meeting with one of the Big Wigs (TM). I'm glad, because there is no substitute for the word "clusterfuck."
|
|
swamp
Community Leader
Don't be a fool. Call me!
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 16:03:22 GMT -5
Posts: 45,436
|
Post by swamp on Apr 29, 2013 10:02:34 GMT -5
Clusterfuck is the best way to describe some situations.
|
|
Formerly SK
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 27, 2011 14:23:13 GMT -5
Posts: 3,255
|
Post by Formerly SK on Apr 29, 2013 10:02:47 GMT -5
I worked at one company where there was a high population of mormons and nobody swore (well, a bunch of people did, but you had to do it very, very quietly - and look over your shoulder first.) It was weird because everyone else I have worked, cursing is acceptable. One of my roller derby teammates is a Mormon and she has cautioned us (and the coach) on our language many times. It's always a little awkward, because we're all adults, our practices are closed, and sometimes there's no better way to get your point across than to yell "Hit a bitch!" Moderate cursing is accepted at my workplace, unless you're giving a speech or in a meeting with one of the Big Wigs (TM). I'm glad, because there is no substitute for the word "clusterfuck." ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/yeahthat.gif) Often times swear words are the best word to describe a situation. Chaos is not nearly as picturesque as clusterfuck.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:30 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 10:10:09 GMT -5
In my opinion, coaches who scream and yell and curse are doing so to cover up their LACK of coaching ability and knowledge. They don't know what else to do or understand the game or what needs done so instead, they scream at the players to try to make them look better. Of Course! It is. Shooby The actual sign of weakness and you will see that from everywhere if you look closely enough. It's just human's behavior of dealing with their lack of confidences.IMO You have another way to relate a message the way you intend to do.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 10:17:08 GMT -5
In my opinion, coaches who scream and yell and curse are doing so to cover up their LACK of coaching ability and knowledge. They don't know what else to do or understand the game or what needs done so instead, they scream at the players to try to make them look better. Of Course! It is. Shooby The actual sign of weakness and you will see that from everywhere if you look closely enough. It's just human's behavior of dealing with their lack of confidences.IMO You have another way to relate a message the way you intend to do. I'km still waiting for the explanation that if all of that is a sign of lack of coaching ability and knowledge, why the massive majority of the best coaches on the planet do it. It seems like a lot of this thinking is only coming from those with little experience in sports and coaching. I wonder if some people have ever even seen a high level sporting event.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 10:21:10 GMT -5
::You have another way to relate a message the way you intend to do.::
I do agree with the idea that you do have another way to relate the message, it's just that the other way is far less effective and succinct in most cases. "Good sir, I would appreciate it if you squared your body to your opponent as he propels himself toward you. Then with the necessary force please dispense of the threat of him running past you by striking him squarely and sending him to the ground to end the play as prescribed by the rules of the game"
vs.
"Fucking knock his ass down".
Cursing often invokes emotion. One of the biggest jobs of a coach is to bring out the proper emotion in his players.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:31 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 10:25:30 GMT -5
I agree with hoops ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/shocked.gif) but I don't agree that a coach should be telling school aged kids to "fucking knock his ass down". By the time the kids get to college it's all a money making machine (and everyone is an adult), so sure. But not to a 16 year old over a HS game.
|
|
thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,510
|
Post by thyme4change on Apr 29, 2013 10:26:29 GMT -5
Clusterfuck is the best way to describe some situations. I have also coined "Fucktastrophie" which you may start using, when appropriate.
|
|
thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,510
|
Post by thyme4change on Apr 29, 2013 10:29:06 GMT -5
Cursing often invokes emotion. One of the biggest jobs of a coach is to bring out the proper emotion in his players. My son was very concerned about this coach's language and said that if he ever had a coach like that, he would just quit the team. I told him that although I would support that for him as a young kid, as he ages, he may find more coaches that push the emotional buttons via screaming and cursing. That was when he asked how old he would be when that would become okay.
|
|
Green Eyed Lady
Senior Associate
Look inna eye! Always look inna eye!
Joined: Jan 23, 2012 11:23:55 GMT -5
Posts: 19,629
|
Post by Green Eyed Lady on Apr 29, 2013 10:31:44 GMT -5
Cursing often invokes emotion. One of the biggest jobs of a coach is to bring out the proper emotion in his players. I agree that is one of a coach's responsibilities - a big one. I also agree that cursing does not mean a coach has no abilities. Bobby Knight curses like a ......Bobby Knight....and nobody with any knowledge of sports can say he lacks/lacked coaching ability. He is also, from what I've heard, a brilliant man, so cursing does not reflect a lack of intelligence either. I wonder, tho, if it doesn't expose some serious anger issues. I'd debate anyone any day of the week as to whether Coach Knight should be allowed to coach at the college level. It doesn't even have that much to do with his cursing. I think he's an abusive jerk in other ways also.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:31 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 11:07:27 GMT -5
I have asked my 16 year old if he has sand in his vagina when he is extra bitchy.
|
|
HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 10:36:09 GMT -5
Posts: 5,395
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"","color":"3b444e"}
|
Post by HoneyBBQ on Apr 29, 2013 13:45:42 GMT -5
My answer is never. I played Division 1 college soccer and our coach constantly screamed at us, belittled us, cursed at us, etc.Told us we were F'ing idiots, pieces of sh*t, etc. I think she thought it was motivating (?) but that sort of stuff didn't work for me. Maybe it would work for men? I dunno. It was not motivating, it did not make me want to work harder or try harder, it just made me want to punch her in the face. I quit after a year because of her. Now that said, I curse (to myself) while playing sports all the time. I don't curse at other people or AT people/players/refs. I have been known to ponder 'WTF" quite loudly as I have to skate to the penalty box while I'm playing hockey.... ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) But I don't engage others, and I'm mostly voice frustration at myself. But honestly, I need to do this less. I've been trying to curtail the cursing more and more since having DD and I'm probably 25% better but I still have a long way to go.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 13:56:43 GMT -5
::I played Division 1 college soccer and our coach constantly screamed at us, belittled us, cursed at us, etc.Told us we were F'ing idiots, pieces of sh*t, etc. I think she thought it was motivating (?) but that sort of stuff didn't work for me. Maybe it would work for men? I dunno. It was not motivating, it did not make me want to work harder or try harder, it just made me want to punch her in the face.::
FWIW I think there's a pretty significant different in cursing with "you're a fucking piece of shit" and "You've gotta fucking hustle". Not all cursing is equal.
|
|
HoneyBBQ
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 10:36:09 GMT -5
Posts: 5,395
Mini-Profile Background: {"image":"","color":"3b444e"}
|
Post by HoneyBBQ on Apr 29, 2013 14:20:57 GMT -5
FWIW I think there's a pretty significant different in cursing with "you're a fucking piece of shit" and "You've gotta fucking hustle". Not all cursing is equal. That's true. It was more the former than the later, but really, it's all pretty inappropriate. I guess the Bobby Knights of the world are usually highly successful and have good teams- it just didn't work for me (or the coach, she was let go a year or two later).
|
|
thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,510
|
Post by thyme4change on Apr 29, 2013 14:28:23 GMT -5
I bet that isn't true. I bet the success of the style is inconsistent. Coaching is about a heck of a lot more than just motivating players. So, if they are bad at giving the team the tools they need to play at an elevated level, all the motivation in the world - no matter how it is delivered - will fail. So, Bobby Knight is successful at giving all the tools, and yells and curses. But, there are a lot of bad coaches out there that yell and curse. And there are bad coaches out there that don't yell or curse.
I would think that motivation is the 4th priority of a coach - picking the right players, mentoring the right individual skills, creating strategies within the team structure (the right plays, etc.), motivating the team to do well, calling the right plays / managing the team during games.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 15:02:21 GMT -5
::I would think that motivation is the 4th priority of a coach - picking the right players, mentoring the right individual skills, creating strategies within the team structure (the right plays, etc.), motivating the team to do well, calling the right plays / managing the team during games. ::
Depends what sport. For football coaches (at the college level), they do little in terms of picking the right players, mentoring the skills, and in some cases don't pick the plays. They are essentially doing high level strategy, ingame decisions, and motivation. Motivation is super important at the college football level, less so if we're talking about baseball where it's a lot more about managing situations and getting players. Basketball is HIGHLY about getting the right players because you don't have a billion assistants with highly specialized areas as you do in football.
|
|
Bob Ross
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 14:48:03 GMT -5
Posts: 5,882
|
Post by Bob Ross on Apr 29, 2013 15:07:49 GMT -5
I think the real question here is when will it become inappropriate for coaches to wear Coach Shorts? ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/huh.gif)
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,719
|
Post by midjd on Apr 29, 2013 15:12:50 GMT -5
According to my driver's ed teacher slash football coach, never. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/tongue.png) He also liked to stand with one leg hiked up on a chair while he instructed us about not getting caught "in the woofpack" and the proper use of one's turn signal. (This is why I'm a terrible driver.) To get back to the topic, I don't think cursing/yelling is necessarily a part of good coaching - but I'm willing to bet that however you define "success", at least at the collegiate/professional level, there are many more yellers than touchy-feely coaches. <<tries not to make Sandusky joke>>
|
|
NomoreDramaQ1015
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:26:32 GMT -5
Posts: 47,559
|
Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 29, 2013 15:18:32 GMT -5
I think the real question here is when will it become inappropriate for coaches to wear Coach Shorts
I think it's a law that when you become a coach you have to wear those shorts. Then every time you sit you must do so in a way that lets it all hang out. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/shocked.gif)
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:30 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 15:22:07 GMT -5
::You have another way to relate a message the way you intend to do.:: I do agree with the idea that you do have another way to relate the message, it's just that the other way is far less effective and succinct in most cases. "Good sir, I would appreciate it if you squared your body to your opponent as he propels himself toward you. Then with the necessary force please dispense of the threat of him running past you by striking him squarely and sending him to the ground to end the play as prescribed by the rules of the game" There's a lot of way to motivate people but cursing isn't one of my style. Lets just put it simple as that. I look at it as a sign of weakness.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:30 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 15:40:06 GMT -5
I would like to add it some thought to my prior comment.
In my opinion, when you use curse words as an motivation it can easily backfire on you in many cases especially with young ones. When their mind's not fully formed and they can use all of the encouragement to gain the confidence to deal with later years.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 15:43:02 GMT -5
::You have another way to relate a message the way you intend to do.:: I do agree with the idea that you do have another way to relate the message, it's just that the other way is far less effective and succinct in most cases. "Good sir, I would appreciate it if you squared your body to your opponent as he propels himself toward you. Then with the necessary force please dispense of the threat of him running past you by striking him squarely and sending him to the ground to end the play as prescribed by the rules of the game" There's a lot of way to motivate people but cursing isn't one of my style. Lets just put it simple as that. I look at it as a sign of weakness. That's fine, I look at people who think cursing is some sign of weakness as ignorant and misguided about language. We can both have our beliefs.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Jul 8, 2024 2:28:30 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 15:45:29 GMT -5
There's a lot of way to motivate people but cursing isn't one of my style. Lets just put it simple as that. I look at it as a sign of weakness. That's fine, I look at people who think cursing is some sign of weakness as ignorant and misguided about language. We can both have our beliefs. That's your choice to live by not mine. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/wink.png) We used to call them a gutter mouth where I came from. And we still do. ![](http://images.proboards.com/new/smiley.png)
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,719
|
Post by midjd on Apr 29, 2013 15:47:57 GMT -5
I don't think anyone here is advocating cursing at kindergartners. But when you get to middle/high school, where most of the kids have filthier mouths than many adults, I'm not sure cursing carries the same weight.
And I agree with Hoops that there's a big difference between "get on the fucking ball" and "you're a fucking idiot." If someone HS level or older is completely demoralized/demotivated by the first comment, perhaps a competitive sport is not an area in which they should direct their efforts.
|
|
NomoreDramaQ1015
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 14:26:32 GMT -5
Posts: 47,559
|
Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 29, 2013 15:49:39 GMT -5
Last week I agree with Shooby and Paul. This week I agree with Hoops. What is wrong with me? ![](http://syonidv.hodginsmedia.com/vsmileys/faint.gif)
|
|
Sum Dum Gai
Senior Associate
Joined: Aug 15, 2011 15:39:24 GMT -5
Posts: 19,892
|
Post by Sum Dum Gai on Apr 29, 2013 15:55:26 GMT -5
I swore at my 14u team for the first time during our game on Friday. My players are predominately 12 and 13 years old. They were all playing like they were hungover or hadn't slept in three days. No hustle whatsoever, and making really stupid mental errors.. We were on defense, my daughter was pitching and had just walked their number 7 hitter which should have been an easy out for us. I called timeout, walked out to the mound, pulled the whole team in, and told them they had the rest of that inning to get their heads out of their asses and prove to me they wanted to play or I was going to forfeit the game and go home. Half of them looked ashamed, the other half were shocked that I'd said ass. They woke up though. Started talking to each other, started hustling. We still lost, but at least they made a game of it, it was looking like a blowout in the making for the first couple innings.
Our practices started in February, our season ends this weekend, and I'm pretty sure that one use of ass was the only time the team has heard me swear.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Apr 29, 2013 15:55:52 GMT -5
::And I agree with Hoops that there's a big difference between "get on the fucking ball" and "you're a fucking idiot." If someone HS level or older is completely demoralized/demotivated by the first comment, perhaps a competitive sport is not an area in which they should direct their efforts.::
I think to go back to snowbird's comment on backfiring...extreme language/actions are most often effective when used to make a point, not as part of EVERY point. So "get on the fucking ball" might make a great motivation to someone who's spacing out or otherwise doing something they shouldn't...but "get on the fucking ball" 30 times in an hour is probably de-motivational.
Conversations about the effectiveness of cursing always make me think of my mother. Woulnd't even let me say "damn", NEVER curses. I've heard her curse less than 5 times in her life (as in like "damn", "ass", not even necessarily major ones), and every time I knew it was FUCKING serious. Kind of like telling someone you love them. If you say it all the time to everyone, it doesn't really mean much, but it means a lot when used and you really mean it.
|
|