(NEW) SMART SPENDING CHAT THREAD

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

You can usually get holiday baggies on super sale after Halloween and Christmas, actually.... and a good deal on pet toys, too. Neither our cats nor my wonderful DH/I care about designs on baggies. If I saw 69 cent paper towels, I'd grab them, too!

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

Comcast was 45 minutes late for their appointment window, so we get a $20 credit on our bill. Yay! (Of course, it's annoying that the cable guy was late ... but we were home, anyway!)

[Sharon]

It is a good thing that this week is a short week at work because it has been a perfectly horrid week. I couldn't take a full 5 days of this kind of week.

Our weather is colder and drier than usual. My hands are starting to crack. I think it is time for a nice relaxing hot bath is some bath oil to replenish the skin and calm my nerves.

[TheOtherMe]

Jan 3, 2013 5:09:05 GMT -5 marvholly said:

Mother
I am generally able to keep my heat set between 62-64. Just wear a sweater, velour top or sweat shirt.

Where I keep mine and with a throw on my lap, along with a cat!

[TheOtherMe]

DS and I toured an independent living facility where we are hoping our parents agree to move. One that fits mom's requirements is open and they don't come open often. It's beautiful, clean, safe, etc. Lots of social activities and you get first dibs on assisted living and nursing home if that time comes.

I'm going there tomorrow, so we shall see what happens.

[marvholly]

Theotherme
Cat will sit on my lap for a couple minutes ONLY then he is off to do whatever-usually nap. My Dad move into a senior’s independent living place (sounds like what you saw) 1 ½ years after my mom passed. There is NO (in place) provision for assisted living or nursing home type care. HOWEVER, there is on-site staff that can be purchased at various levels of assisted living. Also, there is a group of in-house certified FT, live in care givers. That is the route we have HAD to go since summer 2011.

Dad currently has a bug. He is on antibiotics and oxygen again. Looked flushed to me Thur but nurse said temp was normal, oxygen good and BP good.

Today is going to be an at home day. Laundry & some monthly/quarterly chores and/or cleaning. WAAAY behind on cleaning stuff.

[motherto2]

Good morning all! I got a reprieve today of going to sit with my grandmother. Since my folks were gone for 2 weeks, I think they forgot until yesterday when they got up there that today was supposed to be my day. I didn't protest when they said earlier in the week that they were going up both days. I think stepdad tried to see if I was coming up today yesterday when I talked to him. But I held firm. I have to go up there this afternoon/evening because we are celebrating DD's college graduation with my folks, grandmother and aunt. I wanted to keep today open because my new mattress was supposed to be delivered yesterday, but just in case it didn't come until today, I wanted to be available. DS and his buddy were here yesterday for the delivery. It finally showed up around 6 last night! It's called a mattress in a box, and it was the coolest thing ever! It comes shrink wrapped and rolled up in a box. Heavy sucker! I pushed and flipped it up the stairs since both boys had left by the time it came. I got it positioned on the box spring, unrolled it, and then cut open the sealed bag. It fluffed right up! I let it breath and decompress for several hours, but it really fluffed up right out of the bag. I slept on it last night and so far, so good! It has a bit of a chemical smell still, but I put the air purifier in the room last night and it worked well. I could smell it when I rolled over. I'm going to take the blankets and sheets off again today and let it air out some more. I still need to get a mattress pad for it, so I will do that while I'm out today.

My new treadmill is due to be delivered on Saturday between 2-6. I really think there was a mixup of some sort on the delivery. Now it will be interesting to see if I can put it together all by myself. I don't think it's hard, I just don't know if I will need someone's help holding the parts. Hopefully I will be up and exercising on Saturday evening!

I sure did my part stimulating the economy this season. New mattress, new dishwasher, new treadmill. Not to mention all the Christmas presents I bought.

Oh well, everything was on pretty good sales, and every item had free delivery. I installed the dishwasher and will put the treadmill together rather than paying for that ;D

[mrsdutt]

I'm a lazy girl today. I slept in until 7:50 AM. Lazier Marley is still basking in the warmth of the blankets.

I really have no plans other than picking up some hamburg on sale at a local grocery.

My working life was spent in health care. One year I had purchased a new Bone Density Machine for my department. The sales person gave me a book telling me I would find it interesting. I actually read the book. To my surprise one statement really stood out. I read it over again about a million times. It said that when women end menopause they will have a bit of belly fat around the navel area. This is a much wanted 'item' because this fat produced the same kind of estrogen that the ovaries did. (E2). It saved us from early heart attacks and strokes. I have through the years given to this information to women, if I felt they would embrace it. Today I read an article on MSN that is the beginning of the truth coming out. That indeed a bit of 'chub' is desirable if we want to stay health. I have a half smile on my face because I have never been on a diet with the exception of once. And that diet was simply reducing my portion sizes and drinking lots of milk. It took a year, but I lost 65 lbs doing this. That was 7 years ago and I have maintained the loss since then. I keep a bit of belly fat, but a size 2 to 6 pant is still in my closet. (manufacturing differences) I don't have different sizes and I never worry about feeling yucky. I eat what I want and am at peace with this area of my life. All because I read the truth a few years ago. And to be completely transparent, I do yoga. Nothing obsessive, just stretches and the like.

I have always wondered if all this weight stuff is put on us so we spend money on obsessing over it. Making other people rich. This information confirmed this for me.

I have a reason for posting this information. Does obsessing over weight contribute to our day to day stress levels? Kind of hidden because we are use to it being there? Could a bit of peace enter our spirits if we evaluate the concept of weight and what it means to us? Maybe evaluate the subject to find out what motivates us in the quest for 'Twiggyism'. Is it for ourselves? (great reason) Or to please the millions of people we don't know because 'they' say we need to be skinny? This is an important subject to evaluate if anyone is having a problem with self imagine. For me, evaluation and the truth was a complete boost in my self image. Check out a picture of Marilyn Monroe. Nothing skinny about her!

FYI: Stress is a weight gainer too.

[TheOtherMe]

Drove 3 hours to parents and spent the day discussing all this with them, showing them the pictures we took on computer, discussing with facility on phone. They have decided this is where they want to be. I have with me the deposit check and application to deliver to the facility. The independent living apartments are on the upper floor and the assisted living/nursing home is on the lower floor. It sounded like some of the activities are together. If they desire, they can purchase meals there, but for now they will get the local Meals on Wheels once this all happens.

There are two openings at present. The other people came back at 4 PM today and were still with the director when I called at 6 PM. I needed to get home. When I called to let them know I made it home, she didn't call so I'm guessing it really ran late. I will call her on Monday and get the check to her.

This will certainly make life easier for us. From the sounds of it, dad had decided long ago this was the type of place they need to be. He was waiting for mom to say yes. He had an answer for any objection she came up with. She thinks he sits in his chair and stares at the television. I think he's been doing a lot of thinking.

Talked to sister when I got home. She thinks they need to act now and is willing to loan them money to get in before their house sells. Sounded like she and her two college sons are going down to clean out the basement this week. Mom said basement needed cleaned before house is listed and she is right.

[marvholly]

You would not believe BUT my 10 week old furnace went out overnight. Woke up to the house being 56. Called my HVAC guy at 8 am. He was here at 8:30. The repair was under warrantee. A motor mount for the fan had broken. It is finally near comfortable now at 10:15.

[Sharon]

Holly I am glad your furnace was under warranty and fixed quickly. For some reason those furnances are always able to figure out the coldest day to die.

Molly has your husband heard anything about no longer serving breakfast to troops stationed overseas. I had heard some faint rumors of such a thing and then my nephew who is still is Afghanistan said that there was a notice posted on the dfac door that they would only be serving lunch and dinner. I do not know what dfac stands for but it seems to be what I would refer to as the mess or chow hall.

I started a thread over on P&M about this, yeah I know I was crazy.

[mrsdutt]

The government tells us breakfast is the most important meal of the day. This is outrageous, if it's true. i can't see it being true. Can you? Can anyone?

[Sharon]

One of my nephews buddies is saying that on their base they have eliminated lunch.

[TheOtherMe]

Mom told me a strange thing about the military yesterday. I don't know if it's true. Her sister's Grandson's wife had a baby on base in Germany. They are having problems getting a SSN for baby, which they need for tax return. If the baby was born on base to a married couple, US citizen father and German citizen mother, isn't baby a dual citizen which would mean he gets a SSN? Guess I just assumed a baby born on base of a military parent would be a US citizen.

[Sharon]

Jan 5, 2013 14:09:35 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Mom told me a strange thing about the military yesterday. I don't know if it's true. Her sister's Grandson's wife had a baby on base in Germany. They are having problems getting a SSN for baby, which they need for tax return. If the baby was born on base to a married couple, US citizen father and German citizen mother, isn't baby a dual citizen which would mean he gets a SSN? Guess I just assumed a baby born on base of a military parent would be a US citizen.

They are a US citizen but there are more hoops to go through to prove it.

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

I posted in your thread, Sharon.

According to my wonderful DH, the food served in Iraq and Afghanistan for all of his deployments has been vile and disgusting, largely because they contract it out to the lowest bidders, purchasing the food who-knows-where, and it's prepared and served by people who don't speak English and have no idea that hamburger patties shouldn't just sit in a steam tray of water for hours. He can't even get sugarfree (Diet) sodas in the chow hall ... everything is laden with sugar (despite the military's focus on physical training tests, waist sizes, etc.) . And with his work schedule (like the work schedule of many), he was often relegated to grabbing cold cereals or making sandwiches with mystery lunch meat. (This is why I was sending him stews, chili, crackers and soup via Amazon) rather than "hot breakfasts." Don't even get me started on the 15-20 minute walk to even get to the chow hall!

[motherto2]

Hello All!

Thanks all for the heads up on the breakfast/lunch/mystery meat, etc. that goes on in the military. Since DD will be leaving shortly on her first tour, I will be talking to her tomorrow about letting me know the eating arrangments. She is gluten free like me, so this will be interesting!

I didn't have to go and sit with my grandmother yesterday, so I took advantage of the day off and put most of my Christmas decorations. I've been trying to downsize stuff, so the closet I store things in is looking fairly decent right now. Always subject to change, especially when DD brings her stuff home from my aunt's house (she's been living there for the last year and a half while in school). I have absolutely no idea where it's all going to be stored. I guess it will just sit in her bedroom. I've been trying to get both kids to go through their stuff and get rid of it, but it's like trying to pin down a tornado. They both know that I'll take care of it at some point, because I can't stand looking at it. DS will be bringing his stuff home in May while he's away in the Marine training this summer, so double whammy. Wouldn't they be shocked if they came home and all their old stuff was gone ;D.

I spent today getting all of the remaining Christmas decorations (to include the outside stuff) put away. DS is away at drill this weekend, so I am going to put him to work on Monday evening helping me get stuff in the attic (and hopefully get some stuff out of it). My treadmill was delivered today!!!!! I have about half of it put together, but I'm missing some screws. So, I decided to call it quits this evening. I took some time to look through the manual to see if I used the wrong screws anywhere, and I do see where I did, but the flip side is I don't have enough of the screws indicated. I guess tomorrow I will see if I can scrounge up some screws that I have that will work. Very frustrating. Hopefully I will be up and treadmilling tomorrow!

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

Motherto2 .... once she gets wherever she's going and has assessed the food situation, she can let you know what she'd like in care packages from home. I know for me, I wanted my wonderful DH to be able to avoid, when he wanted, a 20-minute hike through freezing rain just to eat, so I sent him microwavable soups, chili, stew, etc... plus things like crackers and protein bars and dried fruit. (The walk to the USO tent ... microwave ... was 5 minutes) He really appreciated the flexibility that gave him (with his weird work schedule) to sleep through standard chow hall meal times, if needed, and to just forage from his nifty stock of food.

We've removed the ceiling fan/light and the sink from the laundry room, and now we're waiting for our new light fixture and sink from Home Depot, who assures me via email that they are both en route.

6 kittens adopted today from Petco.

Rain tomorrow ... only rain in the 10-day forecast.

[Sharon]

Yesterday was a busy day with Bridal dress shopping and a birthday party. I am hoping today will be quiet and relaxed. DD starts back to school tomorrow but will have to commute for the first week until her apartment is ready. I will rest easier once we have confirmation that the previous tenant has indeed moved out and they working on getting the apartment ready for DD.

[TheOtherMe]

Jan 5, 2013 14:17:36 GMT -5 Sharon said:

Jan 5, 2013 14:09:35 GMT -5 TheOtherMe said:

Mom told me a strange thing about the military yesterday. I don't know if it's true. Her sister's Grandson's wife had a baby on base in Germany. They are having problems getting a SSN for baby, which they need for tax return. If the baby was born on base to a married couple, US citizen father and German citizen mother, isn't baby a dual citizen which would mean he gets a SSN? Guess I just assumed a baby born on base of a military parent would be a US citizen.

They are a US citizen but there are more hoops to go through to prove it.

Thanks for the information. Mom's sister said somebody on base was helping them, so I guess it will get figured out. Tax return might have to be filed late, but eventually they can claim their child.

[TheOtherMe]

DS & I thought we had everything figured out with parents and they were fine with it. DS & BIL called last night and offered to loan $ needed so they don't need to wait until house sells when there may be no vacancies. DS & BIL thought all was well.

About 8:30 AM, my phone rings. It's mom. After the phone call, they had a big argument. Mom finally found a place where she wants to be but dad doesn't want to borrow money from DS & BIL. It must have been a bad fight because she told DS after our call that he screamed at her and made her cry and she cried all night. All she told me was that she didn't get any sleep.

Mom told me to tear up the check for the deposit. DS & I are thinking we will go ahead and put the $500 deposit down to get on wait list. I'm willing to gamble $50 if they never get there or wait until they are both gone to get the money back.

DS said she is taking off work on Tuesday if dad hasn't come around to talk to them, make sure house is listed and clean out basement.

Parenting your parents isn't fun. I had no idea.

[mrsdutt]

Parenting your parents isn't fun. I had no idea.

Once an adult, twice a child.

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

I am sorry that your parents' situation isn't smooth sailing, Theo. Here's hoping things improve.

We looked out our windows this morning and there was a hawk perched on my new mailbox!

[motherto2]

Theo, sorry to hear that the parents are in a tizzy with the looming change. I think alot of it is the uncertainty at their ages. I battle my folks with that. As I've said in previous posts, I worry about my mother. I keep trying to talk them into downsizing. Stepdad has alot of health issues, and we all figure he'll go long before mom. He says he wants to wait for about 10 years to downsize, but my point is that she would be so much more comfortable with moving now, than being that much more advanced. I really think he just doesn't want to have to deal with it, so figures he'll leave it for me to take care of. They both know that I want to move away when I retire (5 years, 7 months!). I have decided not to say anything more to them (unless they bring it up) until it's time to start acting on it. My hope really is to move and then try to convince them to move with me to the area I decide on.

I finished putting my treadmill together today. I stopped last night because the screws were all messed up, so decided I better couch it before I got mad and did some damage. I took the time last night and this morning to go over all the directions to make sure I didn't put the wrong screws somewhere. I even checked some of them. All were correct. So, I decided to find some I already had and use them. Worked like a charm!!!!

So, has anyone started the shift to the new forum changes? I guess I need to really figure it all out soon. I dont' want to get left behind!

This week is going to be a rough week. I have to work all 5 days and things are still pretty rough. Oh well, it will get better. Just need to get through the next couple of weeks. Wish me luck!

[TheOtherMe]

Dad is very proud and I'm sure this is a big decision for them. I just hate the idea of mom crying all night about this. She was so happy when I left that she'd never have to do dishes again. They don't have a dishwasher now and she has arthritis in her back. Sometimes, her back hurts and she has to take a break while doing dishes.

Their request that one of us come down every week is not reasonable. The time, the cost and we all have lives and activities. As much as we would like to be with them, we can't when they live so far away. If they were here, they would see us more often. I told them a minimum of once a week.

DNephew and I are going to look at the place again tomorrow. Dniece is going to call as she is the charmed grandchild. Then it sounds like DS & son will go on Tuesday to discuss further.

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

I am still a bit under the weather with a lot of head/sinus congestion... so I'm laying low and drinking a lot of tea. We did have some rain last night and today, but nothing major.

We'll probably venture out tomorrow for groceries since I'm officially tired of all the stuff we have in the house, and I want some fresh veggies and some dinner proteins.

[mrsdutt]

SIL took me to the Home Depot store to get the 8 foot ladder that was on my list. It was on sale with 21.00 off, then I got the 10% military discount. So 84.00 and some change after taxes. I was quite pleased because I thought I'd have to pay around 150.00 to 200.00 for one.

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

[mrsdutt]

THEO: Getting old is a bitch. People get use to their surroundings and have a comfort zone. It's more because they can maneuver the surrounds and that gives them confidence. This could be where your dad is now. However maybe you should talk to dad and let him know how hard things are on mom. I don't know him or if this fits into your family dynamics. It's only a suggestion. Maybe he can exchange staying for doing the dishes or whatever mom needs help with. All old folks know there will most likely come a time when they loose the right to make their own decisions. This is tough on them. It could be tomorrow. They think about it all of the time. .

[NancysSummerSip]

Well, first paycheck of the year came out today, with the 2% pay decrease. Put it this way: what I lose is the amount of money I was putting in my Health Savings Account every month. I have medical insurance, but the HSA is an extra safety net for things that the insurance does not cover, like all those pesky copays, eyeglasses, etc. Last month, I had a nuclear stress test. A $150 copay. I was grateful for having the money.

So, time to retweak the budget this weekend, plus plan on getting more freelance work. I'm also going to consolidate two of my savings accounts into the one that has the higher interest rate (HSBC is down to practically nothing now ). In May, I begin receiving a pension from my very first job; it won't be a ton of money each month, but I am happy to be getting it, and will have it direct-deposited into the highest-yielding account (an account for which I have neither checkbook or debit card, hence no easy way to spend).

Time to start cutting elsewhere, too:

I'll trim back the amount I put in my holiday fund each month
Couponing has been good to me, but it needs to be better
An Aldi's just opened near my office. I am going to check it out this week (I wrote about Aldi's for my column when it first opened here, but that one was way too far away to be useful for shopping)
I need to alter my stockpiling methods, and stick to stockpiling what I can really, truly use.