Optimist's metaphysical & RL journey love, BK, job

[Opti]

8:10AM EST

Bad night. Depressed around 3AM until now. Hoping it
is mostly lack of sleep and lack of hydration (again the last 24hrs.) I have been essentially voiceless since Tuesday night
so I am going to the Training committee mtg.

Found yet more stuff from 2003 including my long budget
form and more Church info. Miss the $5-$7k/mo income days!

At least I found my ordination paperwork. Something I did
for legal reasons so I could practice Qi Gong healing without
worrying so much about being sued. Supposedly Healing Touch, yet another Nurse sponsored healing modality.

Slightly off topic before I prepare to go out in the very cold
which hopefully is above not below freezing, crap I think I forgot.
But it had something to do with Bagua/Qi Gong/Feng Shui...
Oops! The mind over-ruled me on my Feng Shui abilities. Need
to use it to convince my downstairs neighbors not to put
flags in everyone's area ... looks like a gosh darn boutique
embassy when I come home with the flag placement. I hope
it is about Bengali perhaps instead of Sandy Hook the school
but I need to talk to them. They are very community centered,
their brand of patriotic, and I think very married to some ideas
esp. those that likely are connected to Rush, etc. Made the
mistake of telling her about my intention concerning my red BMW,
i.e. it was supposed to be a race car by now and not my daily
driver.

Universe knows what she actually heard though... I remember
a couple men in the office probably circa 2002(Pharma job)
overhear me talking about buying cars and my strategy.
I was talking about my preference was to *buy* a stripper
which in car geek speak usually means buying a vehicle with
the bare minimum the dealer sells with it, i.e. he base model.
I'm sure you won't be surprised that someone came up to
me thinking maybe Optimist was a stripper in college or

I'm glad my voice is considered distinictive but i DO wonder
about my reputation sometimes... Well Optimist/Jane Russell/...
better change so I can show up to this meeting which I forgot to
read about it. The only useful thing about being sick and depressed is I seem to find stuff I haven't put away. Next issue
is tossing and offering up items to the family for storage like
my cello music. Sold the cello as it had dropped in value and
wanted to pay my PSE&G bill, but the music is much more personal. I remember doing those duets, solos with an accompianst etc.

[Opti]

Well its official! My unemployment income for 2012 will
clock in at $13,183.00. My official per Diem job is somewhere
around $6800 I think but it could have rolled into $7K.
It turns out you can live in central NJ on $20K/yr. if you are willing to give up most everything and incur some debt.










In other news, I've decided to shoot for the moon, shoot for 2003 part Duex. I want $100-$150K/yr, but will settle for $50-$60K/yr. I think I can sell myself as a manager but I'll see ...
future uncertain ...and... I have not created a token of office
but I actually know as I type this what it must be: a Turtle-frog
with optional detachable owl. (Yes too much Eastern movies, but
much becomes clear for me after watching them.)

 Why do I know this? Why would you care? Who knows? It is likely Eastern or something. King's actually had some green-glazed pottery of turtle-frogs. (*More ramble, pls avoid if long
stories cause your eyes to glaze over. In 2010 this cool less expensive jewelery store had turtles and Frogs as themes.)

[Opti]

Officially 12:01AM EST here in NJ.

Just figured out my life right now is defined by an intersection
of my volunteer stuff and my ever-changing work hours.

Right now, PSGCNJ has its general meetings every Monday
morning and my home committee has its weekly meetings Thursday
morning. I decided not to get myself re-elected as a Training Committee co-chair because of my BK and other issues. Interestingly
enough when I was working at the per Diem gig, I discovered one of
the official Executive Council Members has finally created an email list of co-chairs that regularly attend the Executive Council meeting.
Break through! I hope they decide to go back/keep the concept of
meeting before the general meeting instead of after the meeting and
after lunch where mosgt of them go spend money on lunch out.
While I could just skip the general meeting, etc. and just show up
at the 1ish/2PMish start of a Executive Council meeting morning would be better for me at least for now... however since in our current incarnation members with jobs remain members I can see
having our meeting at late lunchtime might be useful.


Now let's see if I can post this.
FWIW, this Monday I showed up for the general mtg because I expected it was the talent network and professional pic day. It wasn't.  But I did get a book on cutting edge phone interview techniques.

[Opti]

Even though I am extremely tired I can see I'm missing some connector thoughts in my above post. My preferred specialization
as a co-chair is mucking about in the Executive Council, steering the ship, making policy, and keeping track of what's important.

When PSGCNJ was forced to become its own legal entity or cease to exist - the choice was to go to a lean organization and membership/votining priviledges was assigned to only one of the co-chairs of a committee as opposed to the old model of one vote per committee and just needing at least one committee member to make
an Executive Council vote. The Training committee's voting member is on his third term perhaps in part because I didn't volunteer to stay on and be the voting member of the council... Hmmmmmm.

I'd rather attend the council meeting than anything else from a interest/value perspective for me. I'm currently toying with going to another committee or at least putting the bulk of my effort in there
as, for now, my comments have been brushed aside by the Queen of the committee. AT least, by attending a working meeting on module 5 this past Thursday I get they are trying to outster those with old, inflexible mind-sets. I'm a little sad, in that I think a couple of them could have been brought along by just bottom lining our current modis operandi is tweaking our class presentation for the next month's 3 days of classes. (Also another change. When we were under NJ DOL our room availability was dependent on the DOL and we weren't trying for a very stable schedule of only teaching once a month at roughly the same time each month.)

Not sure if anyone cares to read that likely TMI, but I needed to get it out of my head as it were.

[Opti]

12:27AM EST. Miracle point? Verizon DSL internet has stayed up for almost a half an hour!!!!!!!



So, there's an opportunity to head up the Bookclub at my Spiritual Center. At the moment actually physically being there the Monday nights we meet is somewhat problematic, but all the administrivia
could be done on my time here at home or wherever. Thinking of putting my hat in the ring as it were, with the caveat I need a guest
leader of the actual meetings probably at least until around my birthday in April.


I need to run things at least a little bit to be happy.
Found some paperwork on management styles and it pretty much
said I am an extrovert, like to run things, and make things better.



I also found my state of reality address for the annual meeting in 2004 for my Spiritual Center.(Different name/logo versus today FWIW...) I see how Obama was able to capitalize that speech at
the Democratic convention into where he is now. (I was board President for the 2003-2004 term. )
I'm going to brag. One of the practioners said it was the best President's speech she had heard in twenty years of going to the
annual meetings. I hear the President makes $200/$400K/yr ...
Optimist for President in 2016?

[Opti]

Heck of a day today. I am exhausted and hopefully will sleep
well. Finally activated my $50 Visa GC I won at the Christmas party and I decided late this afternoon to spend at least part of it at Whole Foods.






Well, I spent it all. Its possible I may return something but it wasn't easy to stay close to $50 or less once I decided 'Why not shop kind of like I used to say circa 2001-2003?' Of course, once I decided to really look through Whole Foods and come up with my best combo of $50 or under my expected time in the store rose dramatically.
Easily in the store shopping for more than an hour because typically I avert my eyes at much of it since my weekly grocery budget has been so small.Artisan raw Walnut butter sounds way coo until I factor in that at $10.99 per < 16oz. container it is
more than half of a weekly grocery budget at times.

[Opti]

I don't have a smart phone or working digital camera with charged memory so no pics for Blue if he wandered by.

I went to Whole Foods for the last day of the $1 off coupon for Zevia, which is my pricey Stevia Soda habit which has been on the block for cutting out of my new smaller, grocery budget.

Some of the things I bought and had for dinner:

An Argentinian ispired Empada $2.49
Small portion of a salad containing roast brocoloi, garic, and sun-dried tomatoes. $1.85
Brad's Vampire raw leafy Kale $7.99
(Nom nom. Wonderful stuff with biggish price tag.)

Dessert
Chocopologie Raspberry Truffles apparently made exclusively for
Whole Foods $5.99

Transcendant. Nom. nom. nom....
They are kosher, no apparent dairy, and made in New England.
They remind me of the inside of a very good Godiva truffle.

[Cj]

Hey sorry I got lost for a bit and couldn't find my way back here. 

Opti, you have quite a journal going here... aptly titled thread I might add.

To answer your question: between 125 and 130

Drink water whenever you can and be damned those who say you can't go to the bathroom!

[Opti]

Jan 31, 2013 22:56:34 GMT -5 Cj said:

Hey sorry I got lost for a bit and couldn't find my way back here. 

Opti, you have quite a journal going here... aptly titled thread I might add.

To answer your question: between 125 and 130

Drink water whenever you can and be damned those who say you can't go to the bathroom!

Damn!
Are you between 5'5" and 5'6" in height perhaps?
That's actually my goal weight range although historically
130-135lbs has kept me a size 8 and comfortably athletic.


February 1st sigh...
Per numerology we've flipped to a new month which means
we are now a month 8, colors pink, tan, etc. theme includes
business( must make time for enough job applications because
next month will be a month 9 - complete what you have started;
hold off on starting something new... )

Now if I could downsize back to 166-158 or so I have a really nice
suit that works this time of year. Since the shirts I wear with it are prints from H(Tommy Hilfiger's designer line) it says you need
(potential employers) to pay lots of money and give me my own personal fiefdom(because I'm worth it and perform occasional miracles).

[Opti]

Monday, Feb. 4th 8:25AM EST

Still alive and totally unaware of how much I have slept or not.
Major stress. Need to pay rent, car insurance paymt by phone,
next installment of BK filing fee, and some other crap too like
the utility bill, etc. Need to beat up on Verizon and possibly cancel
my DSL and potentially keep it off for a month or three to fund the switchover to Optimium online which just works. The extreme cold and low humidity make my DSL service not work, mostly all of the last two weeks so ... time to make the goodbye permanent.


Of course this makes having Internet and phone more expensive as I will split across vendors and I need to stay below their preferred bundled package rates of $85 to $100/mo.



But since things are in flux anything can happen so time to clothe
my self with faith and bad assness and see what I can get. FWIW, my preferred Superbowl bailed as our mutual fave couple per him was unavailable. I didn't get a hold of them yet because their contact info is in my email stuff somewhere or hardcopy on a PSG member list unfiled, or Frog knows where!



(Chinese astrology and Chinese movie symbolism. Due to my
iffy state of health, lack of sleep, and consumption of Chinese movies I have decided that frogs are even more special than I thought. I was going to finally burn this cute frog candle someone
gave me when I felt the equivalent of the Phoenix frog had arrived. Imagine my surprise to realize if I made the film, worte the script, etc. *I* *AM* *The Phoenix Frog* Oh holiest of crap piles!

Thinking perhaps I can turn it into a positive ala the Phoenix in Harry Potter and even in the Detective Dee movie ... well I am working on it. I see a better logo/image now though. A frog in a lotue position hovering over a lotus flower(pink) with an orange flame seen behind the frog. Playing with the flame on video or RL could be comic. Is it a flame from a candle, or a house burning down in flames as seen from looking at in front of the Phoenix frog.

Better go and de-ramble. Might go listen to the executive council
meeting, etc. before planning my day vis a vis paying bills, getting
things done, etc.)

[Opti]

Did not attend PSG Monday meeting, not even a small bit if
memory serves. Forgot I was planning to present a piece of
Training this past Wednesday but that needed to be sacrificed to
the must dos.

Managed to pay rent by the 5th using two different checks/bank acounts. I think I got the court payment out on time although later in the PO mailing day, i.e. not before Noon, which hopefully won't be a factor. With impending storm Nemo, the scramble started yesterday so hopefully mail will be delivered early instead of possibly late. (Or the court might be closed today. )

On today's agenda is finishing the online BK course. Going for time and completion over getting the most out of my $25 since
being done by COB is important. Not sure if I have to speak to someone on the phone after I am finished to get the official completion notice but I am setting up my plans in case that is so.

Sinuses are draining again, so I am writing this with some "nice" coughing and feeling the throat getting drier and itchier than I'd prefer. I'll whine about my PT job later. Not sure I can officially "miss" hours I am not scheduled for or agreed to. Funny how I need a minimum of three days becomes can you work today? can you work tomorrow? when it becomes obvious I am working the sitting in the cross-hairs target time of the day shift.
 OK, that was some complaining ... but damn ... if you don't plan ahead and ignore when I say I'm not available during this week should I feel bad our manager decided now was the time to layoff one of the PT evening people?

[Opti]

FWIW, the police and generator trucks were out in force yesterday as early as 5PM. Freaked me out when at roughly 6PM I was directed to drive over a downed power line by a cop. I have a feeling
some serious OT was done by electrical people yesterday into early morning today in hopes of lessening storm related power outages.

The snow totals keep being pushed up which makes me unhappy.
I don't have the footwear for this weather and didn't order any due to my financial and free time situations. The soles are cracked on my longtime shoes and boots so high odds of wet feet if it is rain/slush per past history. May order the something like LL Bean
mocs online since I got at least part of my unemployment claim done yesterday. (Today would have been the three wek potential act of God to fix mark so I'm glad I was able to get through and claim with the best estimates I could. Cleanup, getting my paystubs, etc. on the copious to do list. God, where
is my helpmeet??)

[Opti]

Well ... roughly 20% of the online course to go.
It seems like forever and I have just under 40 minutes of elapsed
time to spend on it to meet the time requirement of the course which is 2 hours or more of elapsed time. I spend lots of
time calculating real or close to real numbers for the course prior
to bankruptcy but given everything is in flux and the answer is get
a well enough paying job ... the numbers for now aren't that important.


Not sure if its me being sick, my sleep is still not regular, and/or
the stress of the ever-changing schedule/personnel etc. at my per Diem/PT job. When I went to the hearing just under 30 days ago on the 10th I only had my two Sundays to work scheduled plus a phone request before I left to cover that evenings shift. By Monday or so the FT receptionist wanted a minimum of three days a week I could be available mid-day, roughly late lunch until the
evening shift came in. Oh, and the request to work the weekend of Feb. 2 and Feb. 3rd might have come on Feb 1st. Yup, the usual
plan ahead stuff...

Anyway past time to finish and see what's what. Its in the rain segment of the storm here but that should change in the next few hours I think when it returns to snow.

[Deleted]

opt,

When I had too many things on my mind in the past, I always tune to the music like this one.
Hope it will help you somehow, make your days become little bit easier.

[Opti]

Funsnowbird, I'll have to check that out later. I just finished
the online course, downloaded my certificate, AND I didn't need
to talk to anyone on the phone to be done.

I should be officially done with this part of my life mid-next month! Now to plan everything else so I can have my grant, heating assistance, etc. ready to roll and some interviews leading to jobs that let me save for retirement, fix the car, have healthcare, and even a travel/entertainment budget again.


Off to the bank to check on my deposit and perhaps pay a utility
bill now before the changeover to snow.



FWIW, in my programming days, about 20 years ago
I used to listen to things like Mannheim Steamroller especially
the Fresh Aire series. I also have Tim Janis and I think my stint
in Pharma caused me to buy some CDs made by the New age group 2002. One of them is my 'wakeup' CD on the alarm clock even though in the past I used it as 'cosmic star' music to help relax me. Stress keeps me almost instantly awake night or day.
I'll love when that changes to being a bit more relaxed...

[Opti]

Well learned my lesson yet again on this message board.
Do not post issues on the YM OT and other popular places
because too many people are invested in the idea of seeing me
as "lazy", "entitled", etc. because it makes them feel better about their piece of the universe or whatever.

Advice is great if it steers you on the right path. It can be soul and body destroying if it steers you to do the wrong thing because of others deeply held beliefs of what the right thing is. Interestingly enough, I schooled a few long time attendees of my spiritual center in the brief time after service I was able to stay. One was complaining about bad role models for teenage boys and at the moment I forget the other issue of the moment. What our non-denominational center teaches is that what you focus on gets magnified. If you spend your time concentrating or
noticing what you don't want, what you won't want gets bigger not smaller. I reminded my friend there are many role models for young men, many of which do not exist on popular television and that sports stars, etc. play sports for themselves and the cash. Not to be pressed into service as roles models for anyone. It is popular culture that tries to make celebs, etc. into role models. I reminded her that in this richest of media environments there are tons of role models in less mainstream TV, movies, etc. She only has to look for them.


Luckily, being  in the teaching, I think she got it!

Focusing on what you want always gets better results than looking at, complaining about what you don't want.

Interestingly a bunch of stuff did change between last Sunday's
shift and last night's shift. The facility got itself an interim Administrator who apparently started around when the storm hit.
Per a patient he camped out in the office, which isn't unexpected and not all that different from what a UNIX admin at certain jobs
would be required to do as well. (Pays lots better than $10/hr. too. ) We also picked up an Interim Director of Nursing which implies to me the Asst Director of Nursing who was temporarily acting as Interim DON might not be long for her position. DONs
recycle out faster than administrators in the building. Maybe we have had 5 or more since I have been there March of 2011?

[Opti]

Well learned my lesson yet again on this message board.
Do not post issues on the YM OT and other popular places
because too many people are invested in the idea of seeing me
as "lazy", "entitled", etc. because it makes them feel better about their piece of the universe or whatever.

Advice is great if it steers you on the right path. It can be soul and body destroying if it steers you to do the wrong thing because of others deeply held beliefs of what the right thing is. Interestingly enough, I schooled a few long time attendees of my spiritual center in the brief time after service I was able to stay. One was complaining about bad role models for teenage boys and at the moment I forget the other issue of the moment. What our non-denominational center teaches is that what you focus on gets magnified. If you spend your time concentrating or
noticing what you don't want, what you won't want gets bigger not smaller. I reminded my friend there are many role models for young men, many of which do not exist on popular television and that sports stars, etc. play sports for themselves and the cash. Not to be pressed into service as roles models for anyone. It is popular culture that tries to make celebs, etc. into role models. I reminded her that in this richest of media environments there are tons of role models in less mainstream TV, movies, etc. She only has to look for them.


Luckily, being  in the teaching, I think she got it!

Focusing on what you want always gets better results than looking at, complaining about what you don't want.

Interestingly a bunch of stuff did change between last Sunday's
shift and last night's shift. The facility got itself an interim Administrator who apparently started around when the storm hit.
Per a patient he camped out in the office, which isn't unexpected and not all that different from what a UNIX admin at certain jobs
would be required to do as well. (Pays lots better than $10/hr. too. ) We also picked up an Interim Director of Nursing which implies to me the Asst Director of Nursing who was temporarily acting as Interim DON might not be long for her position. DONs
recycle out faster than administrators in the building. Maybe we have had 5 or more since I have been there March of 2011?

[Jaguar]

Feb 8, 2013 14:38:52 GMT -5 Opti said:

Funsnowbird, I'll have to check that out later. I just finished
the online course, downloaded my certificate, AND I didn't need
to talk to anyone on the phone to be done.

[Opti]

Thanks Sugi. Just got my UE claim up to date Thank the Universe!
The person at UE must have been tired and didn't want to assist so I skipped the rest of my errands and came home and did my claim hoping to catch up in time. Still to need to finish the lengthy ADP enroll but I think I found all three pieces of info I need so I should be able to do that tonight or tomorrow sometime.



I'm glad to hide back on this piece of the board. Its a strange universe when people want to call you lazy and entitled for not wanting to work 4 days a week for 15 to 20 hours when it is preventing you from searching for a better paying job and getting a grant that will get me a cert so employers will think I am current enough to hire in UNIX. Lots of jealous or something folks out there.
It puzzles me to think there is an alternate reality in which buying
LL Bean Mocs for $44.95 with free shipping after returning some unused Land's End items to help fund the purchase makes one "rich"
or entitled. I think I may avoid Not MSN Money for awhile and seek out the sane folk in RL.

P.S. A shout out to Land's End and other retailers who let me return things years after purchase especially when I've never used the item and I get the original amount paid back. That's a huge reason I've been a loyal customer of Land's End and LL Bean for probably more than 4 decades. Come to think of it I went to Land's End original warehouse in Chicago back in the day. Not sure if I was still in HS or not...

[Opti]

I'd love to do an update as more stuff is happening including drama where I volunteer.

Things must definitely be in process for my bankruptcy as robo calls
have started again. Hopefully they will be short-lived. Only two @1pm two days in a row, but I've gotten two pieces of snail mail which appear to be BK related as well. One was a "clearinghouse"
with an offer to help me buy a car which expires right before my bankruptcy will be official (March 10th?). The other was a "you have been approved, actually the Optimist family(LOL) has been approved for some supposed reduced pharma prescrip costs card. Not sure what their angle is, but I noticed the snail mail address is Washinton, D.C. which should give them easy access to the federal bankruptcy filing data which is public information.

Yesterday, I decided to check out the clinic I had heard about even though I would arrive in the last half hour of their official hours. As expected, they would not process me and I will need to come back.
No one was there or waiting, but they are set up on a binge/wait in line model. Once the line is gone or they hit their official hours the Docors are gone. Apparently I will need to show up as much as 2 1/2 hours before the official hours if I actually want to be seen. It is supposed to be free medical care, but if people really wonder why people don't escape poverty or their situation this is just another example IMO of why. When it takes you two to four times the amount of time and effort to do something compared to people who can afford to pay market rates its hard to find time or the energy to improve you lot in life to say nothing of it is hard to confine one's illnesses to fall in time slots of M 10-2, W 7-9PM or Th 10-2. Notice only one of those is not typical daytime working hours. Plus I was told that perhaps I wanted to show up as early as 4:30PM for the Wednesday time *if* I wanted to be seen. (Yep, that's not going to affect potential employment. )

[Deleted]

Take care, opt.

Hope, everything will works out in your favor.

[Opti]

Thanks Fun.

For now, It doesn't look all that great. Something cosmic going on or something.

Yesterday afternoon I took my exhausted only want to sleep and be left alone self in to work my usual 2 to 8PM shift. Turns out no
one had manned the front desk from 8AM to 2PM! And if that wasn't fun enough, when I got around to reading the email the manager on duty for yesterday wrote in falsehood's in his report to
the managers about yesterday's shift. While the usual shift is 2 to 8PM, I had never agreed to work in it. In fact, on Friday morning, given an event I had planned to attend for a couple weeks spanned both shifts I grudgingly offered to cover 5 to 8PM
only if I was needed knowing the staffing for the position is still
slight. I received email confirmation that I should work 5 to 8PM
Saturday 2/16 which I ended by reading in the wee hours of Sat morning because of my DSL issues. I did not reply back Friday to my
boss even though she sent out the email at 2:30PM Friday in response to my say 9:30AM Friday email. Since I am not the boss I did not contact anyone else including the other receptionist even though I had a feeling it would go wrong. My DSL goes down so often I concentrated on sleeping and making sure I could get through Saturday as scheduled.

To be shorter, in the MOD email, he said I called my boss to let her know I was running late because of snow issues where I was.
(That I never contacted anyone at work to notify of the same.)
This simply isn't true. There was no snowing in NJ on Saturday and I went to my event as planned and returned home. I made no calls because I was coming in as scheduled at my agreed time.

[Opti]

I'll post the later drama of the day. That wasn't the only person
that went off the rails. The person I used to have pray for my
went totally off the deep end and I need to deal with that too.

[swamp]

Well learned my lesson yet again on this message board.
Do not post issues on the YM OT and other popular places
because too many people are invested in the idea of seeing me
as "lazy", "entitled", etc. because it makes them feel better about their piece of the universe or whatever 

I'll start out with I wish you the best and I don't think you are lazy or entitled.

However, the best advice is sometimes what you don't want to hear.   Sometimes people don't get how their thoughts and actions are perceived by other people.

[mmhmm]

I'm going to agree with swamp.  Each of us is the only person who really understands our own circumstances.  We can type words, but we can't type reality for others to see.  Because of this, things can appear very different than they are.  We have no body language, or facial expressions to assist our understanding.  We have no real view of the situation of another.  We have only words.  No matter how well-crafted, the picture painted by compilations of words is perceived by different people in different ways.  Because of this, message boards are no place for the sensitive.  While no hurt may be meant, hurt is often the result of well-intentioned truths told, or opinions given.  Share as you will, but do so with the realization that nobody knows your reality ... only you know that.

[Opti]

I realize that Mmhmm. That's why most of my thoughts are here.
If I had better Internet and a better computer they would be in my blog which I have had no excess cycles to true up to what is true now.



Sometimes the worst advice is unsolicted and I don't want to be the
focus of people's angst. I am not Doxie who either uses the flames towards her as motivation or she is a happy troll. I don't know, but I
am aware that for the most part I am a gentler soul than her.

Taking standard YM advice and some of it echoed in RL has contributed heavily to the mess I am in. I am fully aware it is my fault for believing that taking all available hours when offered almost always wasn't the best decision. Now that it has all hit the wall and I would love to up and quit. I remember yet again only I can be my best counsel. Only I know the entire situation and what I am and not capable of. Other people certainly would have navigated any portion of my life differently than I. Doesn't matter. It is my life to live.


As much as I wish people on this message board would return the kindness and restraint I try to offer here, i.e. suggestions coupled with the explicit understanding it is your show to run, they are who they are. And if they come to message boards looking for targets because their lives suck ... well ...
(Just know my Saturday event involved a class by a UFC fighter FWIW. )

[Opti]

Feb 18, 2013 9:17:36 GMT -5 swamp said:

Well learned my lesson yet again on this message board.
Do not post issues on the YM OT and other popular places
because too many people are invested in the idea of seeing me
as "lazy", "entitled", etc. because it makes them feel better about their piece of the universe or whatever 

I'll start out with I wish you the best and I don't think you are lazy or entitled.

However, the best advice is sometimes what you don't want to hear.   Sometimes people don't get how their thoughts and actions are perceived by other people.

Sometimes the best advice is what people don't want to hear.
Agree somewhat. If they aren't ready to hear it, act on it, and embrace a new path I'm not sure it is necessarily that great of advice to be honest.

When I was at a PSGCNJ meeting recently one person made an interesting comment. He said I miss B. He always had the ability to take people where they were and move them forward. I thought it showed an amazing insight and also the professionalism of the individual he brought up who was so experienced with resumes, etc. that he could help anyone. He could always improve the situation and wasn't married to any vision at all except moving them forward.

I'll readily admit I don't know how many of my thoughts and actions are perceived by others on this board. Since I need to deal with individuals I do my best to try to deal with it one on one when I am able. I understand Z's perception that there is a mob after him because if too many people start 'Yeah Thating' it feels
to me like a group of individuals is somewhat trying you in absentia without understanding or caring this is a real person's life they think should be run their way.

The converse though is also true. I have a hard time taking certain
people's advice with much weight when it seems doing it one way is OK for them but not apparently for me. I'll use Miss R as an example without too much regret as I perceive her as actively hostile to me and my situation. She regularly posts about clients who are more trouble than they are worth and how to get rid of them and acquire others. A very legitimate way to insure Miss R
is using her time in the best way for her. However, if *I* want to use my time effectively best for me - i.e. working on my bankruptcy, staying healthy, looking for a FT job! and working onlhy some PT job hours, well ... Apparently not OK for *me* to make *that choice*. (I know I am uneffective in my job search when I volunteer up around 20 hours a week, or work/volunteer around 20 hours a week, so *I* know its counter-productive for me to change a job that was supposed to be 6 hours one shift on Sunday into a 15-20 hr. PT job I would have never applied for.) I see that as hypocritical and uneven. Ok for you, but not for me - doesn't sit well with me. In addition, there are things she posts that make me think she has absolutely no clue of the work reality most find themselves in. Perhaps she is just joking and I am totally missing her humor. Entirely possible. Its taken me awhile to get IHearYou and even Dark's humor at times. But wondering in print(interwebs) should clients pay her for holidays or when they decide not to have her work one of her usual days, well ... it rubs me the wrong way. I have been in industries where the only way to have the job was to be a contractor. That meant in practice I got the worst of the worst including pay because it was how the business was willing to employ people. The job I got laid off in 2009 was like that in the beginning. I had to try to literally start from zero in savings yet manage to pay my bills on a capricious pay schedule. Sometimes we would get paid for two weeks, sometimes three weeks, sometimes even four weeks would go by. Lot of times it depended on whether the part time person who did the work in Canada was available or got stuff done in time. Plus having no paid holidays, vacation, sick days, etc. I was in a similar spot as Miss R is doing house cleaning. I managed my cash flow to bank for those times I would not be allowed to work, so I could still pay my bills. It was not the only time I have been a contractor where I was only paid when I worked and the employer controlled when and if I could work certain days. I doubt it will be the last. It is the new way of employment and will affect more than 50% of all workers very soon. Depending on whose stats you use we are currently at 40% of the workforce or just under that 50% tipping point.

Another point I remember Miss R making was she had never worked a job where there wasn't a path to move up. I, however,
have worked several. There are also numerous jobs where the path to better wages IMO just wasn't worth it given what a real FT job using my education would pay. Why, literally, would I want to work my way up the retail department store food chain when it was known the manager of the entire store made less than I did at my last job in IT? Just foolish for me, but perhaps others think
restarting in new careers wherever you happen to get a PT or temporary job is a viable strategy. For me it is not. I want to remain focused on where I want to go not get stuck where I just happened to stop temporarily. Sometimes advice is just bad and posters don't recognize that fact. IMO.

[swamp]

Or sometimes you are so stuck on what your plan is that you fail to consider some valid points people have brought up when it's apparent that your plan needs some modification. 

[NancysSummerSip]

Feb 19, 2013 9:14:53 GMT -5 swamp said:

Or sometimes you are so stuck on what your plan is that you fail to consider some valid points people have brought up when it's apparent that your plan needs some modification. 

Like there is such a thing as literal cold reality. Not to mention the fact that looking at your past, whether it's the year 2000, or 2009, is pretty useless. Your previous work history, while it figures into a good resume, does not get your living situation fixed NOW. Likewise, making excuses about part time work, not getting paid for holidays, sick time and so on, just starts to sound lame and tired when you keep rinsing and repeating it. Thousands and thousands of people are in this situation, and find ways to make it work.

And for the record, I know Miss R. personally. She does what she does with a plan and a purpose. Hostile? Hardly. Determined and forthright? Oh, heck yes. She's able-bodied and strong and wants to stay that way, not dependent on anyone or any handout. Her kids are willing to take care of her, but there's no way she'd allow that. She could write the book on coming back from real adversity and making a living doing what you know with the skills you have.

[Deleted]

Thanx, Nancy! The OP has found yet another direction in which to point her finger as contributing factor to her unfortunate circumstances.

Yanno? I'm fresh out of sympathy. I hope I'm never so hidebound when I can't seem to solve a problem that I decide it's the fault of the phase of the moon or a person who crowded me off the sidewalk so that I had to walk under a ladder. Blaming bad advice from me specifically or from YMers in general and claiming that nobody understands her particular, unique and special situation? Words fail me.

I'm off to work. You know, work. To the job I made for myself when I couldn't get a job out in the world.