Would you date someone that had been to prison?

[Deleted]

I don't know if i would or wouldn't. It would just depend. Seems like there are some people who go to jail a long time for relatively minor crimes, especially if they are poor. I guess never say never.

[Peace77]

If I was single, I might depending on why they went to prison in the first place.

People get locked up for the dumbest reasons.
2 farmers were fined and one was jailed for depositing too much money into the bsnk.
A mother was sent to prison for trying to help her son collect a debt (made a phone call).
A young man loaned his car to a friend.

[biglin]

I don't think you can generalise about a question like that.

People go to prison for all kinds of crimes; they're not all Ramirez or Pike and in fact MOST are there for non-violent offences.

So, like most things in life, it depends on the person and what they've done.

I know someone who is in love with a Death Row inmate and I totally respect her and admire her.

I know another woman who is passionate about her desire to abolish capital punishment in America and is married to a prison inmate.

As for me, well, I'm a married woman so I only date my husband!



But I'd have no hesitation if the guy was nice and he wasn't in there for murder, rape or paedophilia.

Like I say, it all depends on the person.

[Deleted]

I wouldn't bother. If you set your standards low you reap what you sow. Set them high, you reap what you sow. Is your friend very young? Does she have a myopic view and just sees his good looks. Does she have self esteem?

[Deleted]

Nov 10, 2012 19:07:34 GMT -5 @abfab said:

I wouldn't bother. If you set your standards low you reap what you sow. Set them high, you reap what you sow. Is your friend very young? Does she have a myopic view and just sees his good looks. Does she have self esteem?

I was almost worried about you...so you have your power and all that stuff back to normal?

In terms of attractions, it is not a science and the heart goes where it will...it is not a money calculator.

Nice to see you around.

[biglin]

Nov 10, 2012 19:07:34 GMT -5 @abfab said:

I wouldn't bother. If you set your standards low you reap what you sow. Set them high, you reap what you sow. Is your friend very young? Does she have a myopic view and just sees his good looks. Does she have self esteem?

I don't think loving a prisoner is setting your standards high or low.

One of my passions in life is prison reform and I visit prisons regularly and I've helped to turn a lot of inmates' lives around.

I've met good and bad people inside just like outside.

It's a bit arrogant to assume that someone who loves a prisoner must have low standards or low self-esteem.

The two women I know who love inmates are both incredibly beautiful and could get any guy they wanted.

So let's have less of the judgemental stuff and more thoughtfulness before posting one-dimensional prejudice.

[Deleted]

There are many women who meet men in the prison visiting room while visiting someone else, next thing, they are marrying them. Men with life sentences and the like. To each his own, I say. But it's just as easy to fall in love with someone on the outside, maybe someone successful and who can be your partner in life, rather than you being his money bags, bringing him food and whatever else he needs, filling his account with cash so he can barter inside with the other animals. But, hey, to each his own. Aim low..............

[Deleted]

Women are, beyond all doubt - theeee most stupidest creatures in the world.

[Deleted]

Nov 11, 2012 11:07:46 GMT -5 biglin said:

Nov 10, 2012 19:07:34 GMT -5 @abfab said:

I wouldn't bother. If you set your standards low you reap what you sow. Set them high, you reap what you sow. Is your friend very young? Does she have a myopic view and just sees his good looks. Does she have self esteem?

I don't think loving a prisoner is setting your standards high or low. Life is short and doing that is a waste of time. You spend your time worried about them, waiting for his 'collect calls', not living your own life, wasting away. While he does WHAT for you?

One of my passions in life is prison reform and I visit prisons regularly and I've helped to turn a lot of inmates' lives around. That's very nice and kind of you. Is this out of the goodness of your heart, curiosity, or are you a social worker/shrink?

I've met good and bad people inside just like outside. Yes, and?

It's a bit arrogant to assume that someone who loves a prisoner must have low standards or low self-esteem. They have!!!!

The two women I know who love inmates are both incredibly beautiful and could get any guy they wanted. Having good looks is neither here nor there.. But do they have low self esteem? do they think much of themselves? They feel needed by these inmates, because the inmates need them, for stuff, and ego stroking, most inmates are narcissists, especially ones that burn down other peoples property because they are 'jealous'and have no control over their emotions

So let's have less of the judgemental stuff and more thoughtfulness before posting one-dimensional prejudice. Says who? You? Who the F&^k are you? you are the judgmental one, you just judged me for merely saying that I wouldn't bother with it and inquiring about the age of this girl!

Look at the original post, the crime this person committed. Sometimes, Missy, there is no 'helping' these folks. And does a woman 'need' a relationship with an inmate when there are so many self-sufficient, decent, non-crime committing individuals walking freely about, without criminal lifestyles/records and all the drama that comes with it?

Like it or not, when a woman involves with a person like that, an angry, violent dangerous person such as the one mentioned in the OP, she does have issues with self-esteem, clearly. She lacks it.

[Deleted]

Hey AB! nice to see you.

[Deleted]

And you toooooooooooooo, Apple! I hope all is well with you!

[zibazinski]

No. I dated someone very charming briefly. He didn't tell me, which was the first thing, his roommate did, and then when I confronted him, he acted just like my EX, a sociopath. Dodged that bullet.

[Deleted]

YES YOU DID!

[blackcard]

Smart women, bad choices.

Or maybe some of those women were not as smart as they thought afterall.

[biglin]

Judgement: In defence of those who fall in love with prison inmates


so now the prison bars

close tight behind

and squeeze the free air

out of your lungs


now the bright stars

shining above

anticipate

the dowsing of each glim


your shuttered mind

breaks in the darkness of this place

as for your crimes

they think that punishment will make you docile


stranded in despair

you clim the rungs

that fenestrate

your inner pilgrim


but even the purblind

who cannot look you in your honest face

except in their quaint pantomime

through which they seek to reconcile

you to your shame and guilt,

tarnished down to the hilt,

your freedom fled

into your barren bed



light shines outside,

warming the earth around

with its heat and glow.

all you can do is bide

your endless time

as deep underground

you hear living water flow



always elsewhere,

always away from where you are,

you cannot share

all that is so utterly afar,

nor hear the birds sing

as they welcome the spring



yet even as stars shine above

in spite of all the penance you must bear

so also enters love

into your prison lair



she or he loves even you,

and makes a rendezvous,

bringing the blessed rainfalls

of compasion to these cold hard walls

[PK Bucko]

No.

[Deleted]

Dec 3, 2012 11:45:43 GMT -5 PK Bucko said:

No.

What if she was an ex playboy bunny?

[PK Bucko]

Dec 3, 2012 12:40:09 GMT -5 @joey said:

Dec 3, 2012 11:45:43 GMT -5 PK Bucko said:

No.

What if she was an ex playboy bunny?

I suppose an exception could be made. But no silicone. That's a deal breaker.

[Deleted]

no....

i wouldnt date one

or marry one

or hire one

i am all for second chances....but let someone else give them that opportunity

i am all sold out of crazy and drama in my life....sorry

[rdoc7775]

Aug 29, 2012 14:26:56 GMT -5 swamp said:

Aug 29, 2012 14:26:18 GMT -5 @justaposter said:

Sociopathic? That sounds dangerous.

burning down shit because you're mad at someone sounds pretty dangerous too..............

==============================================

Approximately 4% of Americans are sociopaths. The great majority of them are not criminals or in jail. However, they cause problems anyway, in that they have no conscience (a hallmark of sociopathy) and are destructive as a result. Read "Without Conscience" by Robert Hare, for better understanding.

[grits]

I have to confess that I started laughing at the prison poem. I read it as this, "Now prison bars, close tight (your) behind.". Oooo I need sleep.

[kgb18]

For me, no. I guess for others it might depend.

In PA there's jail and there's prison. Jail is typically a sentence of less than 2 years and is usually people who have committed less serious offenses like simple assault, lower grade drug charges, DUI, etc.

Then there's prison. You don't end up in prison for something minor. That's serious business. And there's no way in hell I would date or want a friend to date someone who would set fires out of jealousy. That sounds like a dangerous person.

[Deleted]

They actually farm out INS detention to local prisons, so my husband was in county for a few months between illegal entry and being granted asylum. He'll occasionally mention his time, and I'm quick to explain why, and the. Invariably embarrassed to feel/appear snobbish, but ... It is what it is...

[ZaireinHD]

thinking this over and over again!
nah I couldn't do it.
even if it was a Federal Crime, Tax Evasion
I still couldn't do it.

but what if a relationship had started and we got close enough and one day she wants to come forward because she wants to tell me all this time and said she was in prison. well now....hmmm

[Miss Tequila]

I would not willingly date someone that has been to prison (ok, I wouldn't date at all or my husband would get pissed )

But I wonder if I fell in love with someone and then later found out that they had spent time in prison...I honestly do not know what I would do in that situation. For example, if I found out now that my husband had spent time in prison years ago I would not divorce him over it.,..I'd be pissed but I would get over it eventually.

[Miss Tequila]

Dec 28, 2012 17:17:28 GMT -5 kgb18 said:

For me, no. I guess for others it might depend.

In PA there's jail and there's prison. Jail is typically a sentence of less than 2 years and is usually people who have committed less serious offenses like simple assault, lower grade drug charges, DUI, etc.

Then there's prison. You don't end up in prison for something minor. That's serious business. And there's no way in hell I would date or want a friend to date someone who would set fires out of jealousy. That sounds like a dangerous person.

Hmm...I'm going to be honest and say that I have always used the terms interchangeably..I didin't know there was a difference between jail and prison and I'm from PA!

[ZaireinHD]

Yea Miss Tequila I was just say'n the same, where the relationship had already started, then the truth comes out. But the truth is told to me, not me find out out on my own somehow. I think if I found out on my own this person was in prison - that would be a reason to break up.

[Deleted]

Would you date someone that had been to prison?

Depends what they had done, I reckon, and how they'd been since.

[femmefatale]

Jan 5, 2013 0:59:54 GMT -5 @devianity said:

Would you date someone that had been to prison?

Depends what they had done, I reckon, and how they'd been since.

Wrong answer!!

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

Not a chance in hell. Out of curiosity- how and where does one meet someone who has been to prison?