Virgil Showlion
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[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 30, 2012 22:12:40 GMT -5
We've got some real doozies on the board. For your consideration, taken from the first page of 'Top Posters' (because doing everybody would just take too long): Lassie: "Friendships Are Warm ~ True Passions are Fire" Obvious Implications: Friendships don't involve any true passion. (Thanks a lot, Lassie. ) Swamp: "Turns out, you don't need a brain. It's totally overrated!!!" Obvious Implications: Poster must be a lawyer. Or a politician. Iggy: "Plan like a pessimist, so you can live like an optimist. ~Gail Vaz-Oxlade" Obvious Implications: 'Optimism' must include explaining to neighbours why you have a fallout bunker in your backyard. djlungrot: "stop being defensive!" Obvious Reply: I will if you stop being an offensive jerk. PalmBeachPaul: "To argue with the person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine" Not Stated: Don't say I didn't warn you if you try to contradict me. SUGILITE: NAMASTE Not Stated: It means "Die, you camel turd." in Hindi. Moneyjenny: "I don't have low self esteem -- I have low esteem for everyone else. - Daria" Obvious Implications: Daria thinks I'm an idiot. I figured I'd put that in my sig block for some reason. Chocolate Lover: "Standing in the middle of the road with my pants behind me" Wait......what'd she say?! Obvious Reply: She said "There she is, officer. The one with no pants holding the 40." beerwench: "The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues. --Elizabeth Taylor" Wisdom Gained: An awareness of what people with an absurd number of vices tell themselves to feel better. POM: "I think you're confusing my spelling with my typing. " Not Stated: I think I'm confusing my quoting with my drinking. mmhmm: "The only people who never make mistakes are those who aren't doing anything." Obvious implications: If you're posting here, you're doing something. If you're doing something, you're making mistakes. If you're making mistakes, I get to ban your sorry mistake-making keister. Life is good. Just Apple: "Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple" Obvious Implications: Poster was amazed to discover the answer to the question: "I have an income of $1,385.00 a month, rent payment of $3,300.00 a month with 9 months remaining in the contract, two car payments of $550.00 a month each, $85K of outstanding CC debt at 19.5%, $220K outstanding student loan debt, about $6K worth of saleable assets, and a $350K loan due in three weeks, collateralized by a luxury RV trailer that I accidentally drove into a lake two months ago and abandoned. What are my options?" bluerobin: "I put the cur in curmudgeon!" Not Stated: "And my best friend here is the 'mud' in curmudgeon." billisonboard: "Saving the World, one posting on the Home to the MSN Refugees message board at a time" Obvious Implications: If he's in here, he's not out in the world, right? chiver: "Spirituality is an individual journey. Problems arise when you start to carpool." Obvious Implications: Carpooling sucks. Even on a spiritual level. Firebird: "Jul 18, 2012, 8:46pm, darkhonor wrote: Oh, and you're a judgmental asshole, Firebird!" Unstated Rationale: How else was I going to let Dark know that I totally don't care about his opinion? I don't. I don't, guys. Seriously. He could be like... "Firebird is du-uuuu-um!" and I'd be like "Yeah, I don't care." No. I wouldn't even be like that. I'd be like... silent. 'Cause I so totally wouldn't care what Dark thought. I wouldn't even make a deal out of it, you know? It's like "Who is Dark?", you know? Like I don't even know him. Don't know what he thinks. Don't care what he thinks. Seriously. dezilooooo: "Puff, the magic dragon lived by the sea, And frolicked in the autumn mist in a land called Honah Lee" Skip to the End: Puff, forsaken by his only friend, retreats into his cave and dies of a broken heart. The stench is horrible. The end.
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flopsy
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Joined: Feb 5, 2011 23:14:07 GMT -5
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Post by flopsy on Jul 30, 2012 22:23:33 GMT -5
Mine says "Look at me, I think I'm such a bad ass" or something like that
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Sammy
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Post by Sammy on Jul 30, 2012 22:30:15 GMT -5
I have colorful balls in m sig block... just so you know. Funny this thread popped up just as I noted one block that is a copy of a nasty insult directed to the poster. Relax folks, some day you will look back at the time you spent on the boards as just one of many interludes in your life. Oh, and the OP is one funny read. ;D
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Virgil Showlion
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[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 30, 2012 22:30:17 GMT -5
I've never really thought of Mr. Bradbury as "bad ass", but I guess... :-\
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flopsy
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Post by flopsy on Jul 30, 2012 22:32:40 GMT -5
...i couldn't remember what i had in the block...
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
Community Leader
♡ ♡ BᏋՆᎥᏋᏉᏋ ♡ ♡
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:12:51 GMT -5
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Favorite Drink: Chilled White Zin
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 30, 2012 22:33:49 GMT -5
LOL
Here's another:
Virgil Serenity
(Conspicuously left blank) Obvious Implications: "Don't Even Begin Trying to Figure Me Out - I'm an Enigma"
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Virgil Showlion
Distinguished Associate
Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 30, 2012 22:34:20 GMT -5
Sammy: "Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have." Not Stated: Do not make this joke while waiting to learn if your grandmother has succumbed to her nephritis.
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Sammy
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Post by Sammy on Jul 30, 2012 22:36:41 GMT -5
Oh sure, drop a guilt trip on me, Virgil!!
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Virgil Showlion
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Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 30, 2012 22:38:23 GMT -5
LOL Here's another: Virgil Serenity(Conspicuously left blank) Obvious Implications: "Don't Even Begin Trying to Figure Me Out - I'm an Enigma" Ah, but riddle me this: Well over half the registered members on this board have nothing in their signature blocks. By leaving my block blank, could I not be declaring "I am normal, predictable, and utterly mainstream."?
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Virgil Showlion
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Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 30, 2012 22:41:34 GMT -5
Oh sure, drop a guilt trip on me, Virgil!! *lol* I can imagine Sammy in the waiting room with her friends, waiting to find out if Martha is going to pull through her pneumonia. Sammy decides to liven the mood. "You know," she quips, "I always did think Martha needed a little more culture." "What do you mean?" Her friends ask. "Support bacteria," Lassie explains with a wistful smile. "They're the only culture some people have."
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Jaguar
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Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
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Post by Jaguar on Jul 30, 2012 22:44:55 GMT -5
LOL Here's another: Virgil Serenity(Conspicuously left blank) Obvious Implications: "Don't Even Begin Trying to Figure Me Out - I'm an Enigma" Ah, but riddle me this: Well over half the registered members on this board have nothing in their signature blocks. By leaving my block blank, could I not be declaring "I am normal, predictable, and utterly mainstream."? No just flipping boring and predictable. BTW hilarious thread, but predictable.
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Apple
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Always travel with a sense of humor
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Post by Apple on Jul 30, 2012 22:45:55 GMT -5
Hmmm... There its a reason I don't work with the public
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Sammy
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Post by Sammy on Jul 30, 2012 23:59:21 GMT -5
Slow night, Virgil.
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
Community Leader
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 31, 2012 0:11:12 GMT -5
We like it when he has a slow night - he finds something to keep us entertained.
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Jaguar
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Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
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Post by Jaguar on Jul 31, 2012 0:12:26 GMT -5
We like it when he has a slow night - he finds something to keep us entertained. And it's usually different each time.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Jul 31, 2012 0:32:09 GMT -5
A match made in...uhhh, never mind. Well-matched couple though. Little wonder nobody has ever had any luck raising a vein. I'm sorry, baby, but...you need better friends.
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
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Location: Inside POM's Head
Favorite Drink: Chilled White Zin
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 31, 2012 1:20:54 GMT -5
You talking to me? --- or Virgil?
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Jaguar
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Post by Jaguar on Jul 31, 2012 1:28:37 GMT -5
You talking to me? --- or Virgil? It has to be Virgil.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Jul 31, 2012 1:35:05 GMT -5
You talking to me? --- or Virgil? Well, it's YOUR quote.... (and I can't imagine caring about Virgil's "friends")
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Colleenz
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Post by Colleenz on Jul 31, 2012 6:11:52 GMT -5
When did Doxie change her screen name to Just Apple?
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Virgil Showlion
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[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
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Post by Virgil Showlion on Jul 31, 2012 10:48:22 GMT -5
My thoughts exactly. Apple was just amazed that Doxie could ask such elaborate, detailed questions and still get back the answer: "You're screwed."
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jul 31, 2012 13:48:26 GMT -5
LMAO! Daria and I would get along great if she was a real person. I love that quote, and it does describe how I feel about most of the people I encounter.
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 31, 2012 13:50:37 GMT -5
Guess you don't know that song huh?
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Chocolate Lover
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Post by Chocolate Lover on Jul 31, 2012 13:51:10 GMT -5
LMAO! Daria and I would get along great if she was a real person. I love that quote, and it does describe how I feel about most of the people I encounter. You can call me Daria if it makes you feel better. I feel that way about most everyone too
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 31, 2012 16:11:28 GMT -5
Hmmm... There its a reason I don't work with the public So they don't know you drink on the job or is it so you don't have to share? Oh sweetie. It's like you don't even know me! I never confuse my drinking with anything! I stay really focused when it's important. ;D
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 31, 2012 16:13:13 GMT -5
lmao, POM !
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Jaguar
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Fear does not stop death. It stops life.
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Post by Jaguar on Jul 31, 2012 16:15:50 GMT -5
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 31, 2012 16:17:07 GMT -5
Hey SL!!! Is our friendship warm or true passion on fire? Hey Sugi!!
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
Community Leader
♡ ♡ BᏋՆᎥᏋᏉᏋ ♡ ♡
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:12:51 GMT -5
Posts: 43,130
Location: Inside POM's Head
Favorite Drink: Chilled White Zin
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 31, 2012 16:19:37 GMT -5
Hey SL!!! Is our friendship warm or true passion on fire? If you have to ask, then you really don't know me at all. It's kinda like asking "Was it as good for you as it was for me?" ;D
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Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 31, 2012 16:22:18 GMT -5
LOL Here's another: Virgil Serenity(Conspicuously left blank) Obvious Implications: "Don't Even Begin Trying to Figure Me Out - I'm an Enema" FIXED! Sorry - I couldn't resist fixing that for a laugh at sweet Virgil's expense. I don't really think that!
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