Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on May 10, 2012 13:46:37 GMT -5
Maybe Dark's theory applies to your opinions on woman wanting sex too. My theory applies to pretty much every relationship issue. Humans (yes WWBG/SF even us superior ones with the dangly genitalia ), rationalize pretty much everything. We stereotype, tell ourselves that we all do it (whatever it is), or they all do it, or everyone does it. Nobody wants to admit that everyone else is fine and we're just personally flawed, selfish, stupid, or whatever.
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The J
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Post by The J on May 10, 2012 13:46:39 GMT -5
...:::"I don't know any woman that would willingly not have sex....here's a little secret, we like it too!":::... Thanks for the laugh. Yeah yeah we all know that ALL women HATE sex, ALL women have image issues just because YOUR wife puts out so little. What a bunch of crap you dish out WWBG!! To be fair, Tina's post indicates that ALL women LOVE sex, and ALL women want to have sex ALL THE TIME, and if not it's the guy's fault. That's as equally ridiculous as WWBG's position that his wife's behavior is indicative of all women.
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Angel!
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Post by Angel! on May 10, 2012 13:46:50 GMT -5
QQ, your argument makes sense in a vacuum, but not necessarily in that relationship. I thought her argument made perfect sense. Everyone is allowed to change their mind. Changing your mind doesn't mean you get to trick you spouse to get your way though.
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bookkeeper
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Post by bookkeeper on May 10, 2012 13:47:16 GMT -5
I want to know who is going to get the pressure cooker in the divorce settlement.
That's where I came into this drama, when Carl was upset about his wife wanting to buy a pressure cooker.
Aaah. Good Times.
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aliciar6
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Post by aliciar6 on May 10, 2012 13:47:41 GMT -5
It's ok for her to change her mind, it's just not ok for her to NOT tell him, and lie about things and hide things in order to get what she wants NOW, instead of having a grown up conversation about it. Or if that doesn't work, go to counseling and try to work it out that way.
If I was not ready for a child and FI purposely sabotoged my BC and hid that fact, that would be a deal breaker. I could never trust him again. If I did something like that to him, it would be the same way. No matter what was agreed to in the past, it's the current agreement that stands and it will change when we both sit down and talk about it and discuss our path forward/goals/end state etc.
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973beachbum
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Post by 973beachbum on May 10, 2012 13:49:04 GMT -5
He married one who apparently doesn't. We don't know if she was never with someone who really made her feel good or whether she just has a naturally low desire. What we do know is he intentionally married a woman with a low libido. Yeah, which makes me wonder if this is his only experience with other women as well, only WWBG is the common denominator. OMG! I know this is a serious thread but now I am cracking up. that is the most polite way to phrase something I may have ever heard.
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swasat
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Post by swasat on May 10, 2012 13:49:10 GMT -5
Yeah yeah we all know that ALL women HATE sex, ALL women have image issues just because YOUR wife puts out so little. What a bunch of crap you dish out WWBG!! To be fair, Tina's post indicates that ALL women LOVE sex, and ALL women want to have sex ALL THE TIME, and if not it's the guy's fault. That's as equally ridiculous as WWBG's position that his wife's behavior is indicative of all women. No, what Tina said was SHE personally does not know any woman who does not like sex. She didn't say Women in general don't like sex. All of WWBG's posts are for "women", not "some women".
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swamp
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Post by swamp on May 10, 2012 13:49:12 GMT -5
...:::"I don't know any woman that would willingly not have sex....here's a little secret, we like it too!":::... Thanks for the laugh. If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............
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Waffle
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Post by Waffle on May 10, 2012 13:49:44 GMT -5
Good grief, this is growing faster than a Doxie thread. I'm 10 pages behind!
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 10, 2012 13:50:56 GMT -5
My questions are - if this behavior is all present long before the wedding (and in both of the cases we're discussing, it was) - 1) why be surprised when this selfishness later manifests; and 2) if you're going to be bothered/suprised by it, WHY marry this person?
I see this as another way to deflect from the real issue. It's like that old story about the scorpion and the frog, and the scorpion says as they're both drowning "Sorry, it's just my nature."
I can easily imagine cawiau's wife thinking to herself, "What's his problem? He always knew I wanted kids and he always knew that I get what I want."
That does not change the fact that her actions were wrong. ANYTHING that distracts from what SHE did here - because it was pretty damn bad - is a win for her. Anything that takes the focus off her deceptive manipulation is +1 for Mrs. C.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2012 13:50:59 GMT -5
Not long ago cawaui did a really nice post about his wife's good qualities. The woman he described there didn't match the one that ends up getting torn apart in these threads. I think he takes a certain amount of poetic license for our entertainment purposes.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on May 10, 2012 13:51:20 GMT -5
Maybe Dark's theory applies to your opinions on woman wanting sex too. My theory applies to pretty much every relationship issue. Humans (yes WWBG/SF even us superior ones with the dangly genitalia ), rationalize pretty much everything. We stereotype, tell ourselves that we all do it (whatever it is), or they all do it, or everyone does it. Nobody wants to admit that everyone else is fine and they're just personally flawed, selfish, stupid, or whatever. This is refreshing. Makes me want to save it to a word doc for later use when you are in a less rational state of mind. (I miss my full set of emoticons. Where did they go? )
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 10, 2012 13:52:01 GMT -5
I just take issue with the part where he applies that description to my entire gender. It's sexist and unfair and frankly, I really think it's beneath him. Let's say, just for arguments sake, that you married a completely selfish brat. Would you rather; A) Admit that you had plenty of options and chose poorly B) Convince yourself that all women are that way anyway, so your choice was fine Which would be easier to live with on a daily basis? Got a point there.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 10, 2012 13:52:05 GMT -5
I'm not sure how anyone could disagree. I think having unprotected sex during your fertile period, while knowing it was your fertile period, would be the definition of tryingIt seems like a sentiment here is "well he threw out the condoms at one point, so therefore she thought it was okay to be careless". No he said she was tracking and then LIED about it not being her fertile window. That's not "being careless" that is deliberately increasing your odds of getting pregnant at the time you have sex. Now you are actively working on getting pregnant. Yes if you toss the condoms there are good odds you will get pregnant but that's not the same thing as knowing when your peak fertile window is. Change your mind all you want. AND THEN TALK TO YOUR SPOUSE! See what they're thinking and reach a decision together on the next step, whatever it is. Some conversations are NOT easy to have but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have them. And you definitely do not have them with your cousin who thinks it is a brilliant idea to secretely drug your spouse.
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on May 10, 2012 13:52:33 GMT -5
If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ I'd be in on that too......if you can wait until I get my hips back. <never mind.....I just can't walk, the rest works well>
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midjd
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Post by midjd on May 10, 2012 13:52:48 GMT -5
Same as Doxie's last thread, where her H was the man of her dreams on page 1, and an alcoholic who couldn't be trusted to bathe his own kids by page 20...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2012 13:53:28 GMT -5
If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ damn woman, you just really want to have a road trip, huh? mich, ROFLMAO!!!!
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 10, 2012 13:53:32 GMT -5
First of all, we don't really know what she agreed to. Second of all, at one point he agreed to have a baby now. And at another point he agreed to buy a house. He agreed to things too and changed his mind. Why can't she?
Changing your mind = okay.
Changing the game plan through trickery and deception without telling your partner because YOU changed your mind = very, very not okay.
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quotequeen
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Post by quotequeen on May 10, 2012 13:53:34 GMT -5
If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ It's the need to save them that gets you in trouble.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2012 13:53:42 GMT -5
I'd like to think that WWBG's posts about women aren't completely serious. If he really believes what he writes about his wife and women in general, it wouldn't seem that he really respects her and likes her. That would mean she's married to someone that doesn't respect her or like her. What would have to be going on with either one of them to marry the other? Sad for both of them.
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Post by Savoir Faire-Demogague in NJ on May 10, 2012 13:54:20 GMT -5
No, what Tina said was SHE personally does not know any woman who does not like sex. She didn't say Women in general don't like sex. All of WWBG's posts are for "women", not "some women".
Tina knows women who say the like sex. Women tend to talk a big game, especially in that area.
Talk is cheap.
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on May 10, 2012 13:55:05 GMT -5
This is refreshing. Makes me want to save it to a word doc for later use when you are in a less rational state of mind. Feel free. I'm not trying to imply it doesn't apply to me. I'm just as flawed as the rest of you. <-- see what I did there? I can't admit that I might be flawed while the rest of you aren't. Nope. I'm a neurotic head case sometimes, therefor everyone is a neurotic head case sometimes. It's how we're wired.
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Post by Savoir Faire-Demogague in NJ on May 10, 2012 13:55:57 GMT -5
If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ Like I said, talk is cheap...
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Bob Ross
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Post by Bob Ross on May 10, 2012 13:56:02 GMT -5
If you truly believe that WWBG, I feel sorry for you. I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ Will DH be in on it too? You three could form the letter "A".
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quotequeen
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Post by quotequeen on May 10, 2012 13:56:10 GMT -5
Same as Doxie's last thread, where her H was the man of her dreams on page 1, and an alcoholic who couldn't be trusted to bathe his own kids by page 20... Are you kidding, that was by like page 4.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 10, 2012 13:56:19 GMT -5
It shouldn't be about "winning"... it should be about them reaching a decision they can both live with, and figuring out how to come to these decisions in the future without one person saying "this is how it's gonna be, end of story" or one person going behind the other's back.
Oh, I agree that marriage shouldn't be about winning. But I think that's overly optimistic in this case. Mrs. C has proven she wants what she wants and she doesn't care how she gets it. If she had a baby and somehow C never found out about her scheme, that's exactly what would have happened, too.
That's called winning.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on May 10, 2012 13:57:52 GMT -5
Good grief, this is growing faster than a Doxie thread. I'm 10 pages behind! No kidding. I'm about to go into a meeting - please to avoid getting beyond page 35 before I return
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Opti
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Post by Opti on May 10, 2012 13:58:10 GMT -5
No, what Tina said was SHE personally does not know any woman who does not like sex. She didn't say Women in general don't like sex. All of WWBG's posts are for "women", not "some women".Tina knows women who say the like sex. Women tend to talk a big game, especially in that area. Talk is cheap. Maybe SF and WWBG can have a bro-mance. Love on the down low. Then they can tell us who's better in the physical art of romance. ;D
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swamp
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Post by swamp on May 10, 2012 13:58:31 GMT -5
I want to have a road trip and show him what really good sex is............ Like I said, talk is cheap... Divorce is expensive, and DH would not be amused. He doesn't like to share good sex. Unless it's a threesome, then he's all over it.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on May 10, 2012 13:58:51 GMT -5
Seriously...do you guys only date women that don't like sex??? This is a serious question...but if you are doing it right how could she not like it and want to experience that often? I'm trying to be pg-13 (which for those of you that know me it is not an easy task for me!lol)....but if know what you are doing and can give her O's why the hell wouldn't she want to have it???
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