Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Mar 26, 2012 16:22:27 GMT -5
We found out later that day that they are serious about buying it, but don't plan on flipping it, but fixing it up and "selling" it to my SIL. WTF! Why is it that someone with NO common sense and even less financial sense should be basically given a house. I admit I don't know the details, but even if they sold it to her for what the paid and put into it, it would be less than $50,000, her monthly payments would be less than rent just about anywhere and I'm guessing here that FIL would just draw up the paperwork and let her pay him instead of getting a real mortgage. It annoys to no end that both sets of parents run to fix everything for our younger siblings, while DH & I work for everything that we have. I feel for you, my sister deals with the exact same thing with her in-laws. Always giving help to the 2 daughters (and their hubbies/kids) up to and including a similar house purchase, but expects their son to just 'man up' and take care of his own family himself. It's really frustrating!!
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azmom
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Post by azmom on Mar 26, 2012 16:47:46 GMT -5
Dakota: Oh- How I feel frustration on this one. In fact DH and I just had a rather lengthy vent session with each other about our parents and our siblings. We have come to the conclusion that we are EXPECTED to not need any help because we have always managed to take care of ourselves and be the responsible ones. Somehow they think we will be okay or don't need the help. A backhanded compliment I guess BUT it drives me up the damn wall. I have so many examples to share but in the spirit of being respectful I will not (another quality we posses and they do not!). The things my MIL does for my BIL drives me crazy. Maybe I'm just jealous of the help they get but I wouldn't even think in a million years to have the audacity to ask or demand such things. My dad is dead so that was forced to stop on my side but it was the same way when he was alive. My siblings would get bailed out and had their hand held all the time. I borrowed money from my grandpa for school (which I paid back on pay day two weeks later) and for those two weeks my dad was on my case about it!! Phew, sorry. Like I said, I know your frustration!
Thanks Red and MK. Thank the rest of you for stopping by.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 26, 2012 19:39:12 GMT -5
3 NSDs...how pathetic. Redwagon-Congratulations!!!! Dakota and AZ- it is the same way in my family. My brothers always have their hands out and my parents (who are dirt poor) are always handing over what they have. It drives me insane. I moved out at 18 and have never asked my parents for money. My brothers are 28 and 38 and always are asking. UGH!
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Honeylioness
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Post by Honeylioness on Mar 26, 2012 19:53:06 GMT -5
mizbear - Just to clarify my iPOD collection. I have a LOT of classical pieces, and each movement or section of a symphony counts as 1 song. I also downloaded a lot of items from my friend's hard drive which I must say I either never heard of or will most likely never listen to! But I checked and as of today I am showing 545 different artists, 3394 songs and 380 books. A lot of the books were free since they are considered classics and past any copyright infringements. I also have a lot of free e-books on various creative fronts. Honestly, I did not think I would be someone who would use such a device very often - but between the quilting applications, books, music, calendar function, contact list and memo/note pads where I can keep track of to-do lists I think I am hooked!
3cats - I am glad you had a good lunch with your cousin and soon-to-be-ex SIL. I think it's a good idea that you have a plan to meet once a month.
mitten - Sorry to hear about the trouble with both your vehicles. I think car issues can be just as stressful, if not more so, than even housing.
dakota - I can understand your frustration about your families doing so much for siblings that just cannot seem to get themselves our of their own messes. I am sure the parents feel they are doing their best for their kids - but often they cannot see that often this sort of enabling in the long term is not that beneficial.
Interview - I think it went well, but at this point I cannot be sure anymore. Probably won't hear anything until mid-week. Trying to not get too excited about the possibility so I don't get too disappointed when it falls through.
New bed - So on Saturday morning my new mattress and box spring were delivered. And I must say what a difference 10+ years make in design!!!! I feel like the Princess in the fairy tale about the pea put under her mattress. In the next week or so I will be looking for a small stool to put next to the bed so I can get in each night without having to crawl over the side! If not just for me, then for the next time my parents visit as without a step stool there is no way my mother will ever make it onto the mattress.
No longer can I sit on the edge of my bed and have my feet touch the floor, and I did not even have to bend over to put sheets on the bed! The entire height has gone up about 4-5 inches. Even the cats were looking up at the new bed as if to say "What the HECK happened here?" Two of them have taken to not even jumping directly onto the bed - they take the smaller jump onto the hope chest at the end, then make the small climb onto the bed.
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Mar 26, 2012 20:03:12 GMT -5
Family can be extremely frustrating- I will say that.
I too love all types of music from classical and ancient prayer calls and what not to some of the most recent stuff out on the charts- but I specialize in 1960s-70s rock n roll and lots of country music.
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dakota4600
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Post by dakota4600 on Mar 27, 2012 10:34:37 GMT -5
Thank you all for listening. I just really needed to get that off my chest before I got home and said it to DH. We agreed early in our marriage that complaining about our in-laws to our spouse was counterproductive, it just puts the other person in a defensive mode. Our rule is if it isn't something we can address with them and possibly effect change, then we just have to work on letting it go. For example recently DS has been saying Oh My God and Oh Lord A LOT. DH & I both know that it is primarily his mom who says those and she thinks it is really cute when mini-D does it. So DH will address that with her. But that is something we can talk to her about and it is a fairly easy fix.
I know a lot of you are in the same boat and I really appreciate the empathy. My IL's have put in an offer on the house, so it could be interesting.
Honey- We got a new bed in January and it is a lot taller than our old one too! I have to climb in to bed now too and can't sit on the bed and reach the floor, but oh it is so comfy and my back no longer hurts.
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redwagon
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Post by redwagon on Mar 27, 2012 10:43:10 GMT -5
Honey - enjoy your new bed!!
dakota - sorry about the ILs. That would frustrate me too. That's a great arrangement you have with DH. Luckily we haven't run into issues yet, as I think we both lucked out with our ILs. That could all change once we bring a baby into the mix, especially as my ILs live close by and my parents are three hours away. I can see some competitiveness getting in there lol.
Angel - thanks!
Hoping Blue's bonus comes in tomorrow's paycheck. Would love to pay off a CC!!
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Mar 27, 2012 12:54:24 GMT -5
doing pretty good on my vacation so far! I forget how many NSD and CSD I had in my calendar but the rest of the month will be CSD. Picking up blue at the airport tonight
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azmom
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Post by azmom on Mar 27, 2012 16:36:41 GMT -5
4 NSD- I managed not spend yesterday but I am certain that was just a fluke at the rate I am going these days. Speaking of... I can't even remember the last time I had my hair cut and colored in a salon. I used to get it regularly done (you know when it was easy to drop over $100 on a cc and not worry about it) Now that we have been cc free for three years + I have a hard time spending so much money on my hair because 1) we haven't had a surplus in a while and 2) I always find something the kids need instead. I decided to stop putting myself last all of the time and I would go get my hair cut and colored (no guilt) as a anniversary present from DH I started looking up the old salons I used to go and just about fell over when I realized just a hair cut and style STARTED at $45!!! The same day I received a promotion for one of the salons offering g/c for $100 worth of serviced for $50!! I bought two of those babies and made an appointment for Saturday right before my date night with DH!! I'm so excited. (I should say I have $200 in fun money this check. Well actually DH and I each got $300 but I gave up $100 so DH could renew our AZ Cardinals season tickets from our fun money-so proud that we didn't use savings this year for them) so now $100 is gone and I'm trying to make a list of things I have been wanting but never get. (good shampoo/conditioner, make-up, hair product, sunglasses, belts and accessories) You could see how this could easily run over $100 so I am going to make a list and do some research before I spend my next $100. Dakota: That is a great deal between you two. I don't have parents so easy for me to forget that. I am more careful about my vents to DH after I was going off and DH just simple said, "You do realize that is my mom and brother you are talking about?" Talk about being humbled! He brought up our last little talk but we kind of kept it more about the why we think it is that why and not trash talk anyone even though it was implied. SS: I am so excited for you to see Mr. Blue Eyes.
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moneysquirrel
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Post by moneysquirrel on Mar 27, 2012 20:14:33 GMT -5
Update: 17 NS Days and 8 CS Days
I hope all of you are doing well. I managed to add a few additional days to my totals. I tend to try to lump all my spending on the same days -- just helping to conserve gas and time to run as many errands/shopping trips as possible on the way home from school.
Start -- have fun with the redecorating and with Blue Eyes
Honey -- Keeping my fingers crossed that you receive good news soon.
Dakota -- Hugs
Good News -- I signed my contract for another year. FYI: My school like many others work on a year-to-year contract. Until I actually sign the papers for the following year, I am never sure of a job. Also at my age I never know of they will go with a younger/ less expensive teacher. So I am thrilled that I will be on staff for 2012-2013.
mizbear -- May your wishes or what is the best for you come true.
azmom -- Since I decided to go natural with the hair -- the hair expenses are not as high as many others. Since my hair looks like it has been frosted I'm OK with it.
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3catslady
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Post by 3catslady on Mar 28, 2012 6:58:37 GMT -5
update; 26 NSD; 2/31 NEO or is it 26/28 NEO. I'm confused . Do we have any names for April? It is just around the corner. There are 3 more days in this month, yet. The older you get, the faster time goes. I want to stay young ;D. I am getting ready to pay my bills for April and have added one more to the lot. I AM GOING BACK TO WRITING SCHOOL. I started this course about 15 years ago and completed about one third of it. I am now going to finish it. I am feeling much better but I still have my days. At least they are not weeks but I do have a week once in a while, not every week and every week. I also talked to my new boss and she and I are going to work my problems out at work. Finally, someone who wants to work with me. I was getting very tired of having the schedule change every other day by the other manager. This one is trying to give me the same schedule every week so I can get into a routine which makes life so much better when you know ahead of time what you are going to be doing and when you are going to be doing it. That is why I felt I could finish my writing course.
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Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Mar 28, 2012 8:19:15 GMT -5
Finally, I got another NSD yesterday! I was beginning to despair of getting another one before the end of the month. ;D My total is only 11 or 39%, though, so not quite as good as I was doing earlier in the month. Not bad, though, because most of my spend days are still CSD's less than $10-20 spent. I might track those next month. I'll have to think about how I want to do it.
I probably won't spend today either, because I have to finish filing my taxes and won't be running any errands. I finally got my last corrected 1099, so I might be able to get it all done today and off my to-do list. Yay! I'll get a little refund, but that's just for savings, so I haven't been in a rush.
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Mar 28, 2012 10:48:42 GMT -5
No Ambivalence April? Absolute April (sounds like a good Happy Hour drink)? All About Saving April? April Saving Showers?
I must admit when I bought my new bed- I intentionally bought a shorter bed. I hated hated hated my first pillow top. I had my bed on risers to get extra storage and it was hard for me at not quite 5'4" to get in- much less if the girls wanted to talk to me. So when I bought the queen- I took it off the risers and bought a more traditional mattress height. Plus the extra expense at the time for "deep sheets".
3cats & money- YAY!!!!
Lots doing for the next few days with everything going- HUGS everyone!
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azmom
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Post by azmom on Mar 28, 2012 11:52:46 GMT -5
Money - I think the main reason why I am so desperate to get my hair done is my grey hair. It is coming in at full force and with my dark hair it screams look at me! It doesn't blend well at all. I'm hoping the highlights will help blend it in. I'm not ready yet! Congrats on your new contract!
I'm 3.5 weeks into 6 weeks of my boot and I am getting anxious to run. I can tell that it is healing but not fully. I will NOT run like promised. Instead I think I am going to focus my energy on yet another blog...crazy since I barely have time for the one I have now. It's going to be a running blog that starts at the beginning (nutrition, essential items needed, stretches, recovery and then a walking program to get you running for 10 minutes and then a run/walk program for a 5k and then increase from there) I decided to just start over when it comes to running and do it right this time. I failed to realize just how much my age factors into my diet and recovery from the wear and tear on my body.
Going out to breakfast with DH and DD has a game tonight.
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Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Mar 28, 2012 14:38:01 GMT -5
No Ambivalence April? Absolute April (sounds like a good Happy Hour drink)? All About Saving April? April Saving Showers? Here are some other somewhat fiscal prudence minded "A" words for consideration... Alert Astute Attentive Assured Accomplishment Awakened
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redwagon
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Post by redwagon on Mar 28, 2012 14:52:58 GMT -5
money - yay for a job!
3cats - congrats on going back to school!
I like Attentive April. Just being aware helps a lot. I need to figure out exactly where money goes regarding "house" costs to better budget for this type of thing. Spring is pricey. And we need to make room for baby stuff in the budget.
Blue's bonus came in so our Home Depot card is almost paid off. That was opened for our Bay Window we put in. We still need to stain it, but totally loving it!
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Mar 28, 2012 15:36:20 GMT -5
Attentive- I like that.
My mother is lazy. My vent for the day.
We had to replace the scale. It died. $19.99 plus tax- but we are supposed to be weighing ourselves in regularly. It is a necessity with the weight issues really.
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3catslady
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Post by 3catslady on Mar 28, 2012 16:49:54 GMT -5
I like Attentive April and I will just track all my little spending and see how many no spends I get. I don't need to spend any money that I have laying around the house. Then I can put more in savings and get that built up. I do like the idea of not counting the amounts under $5 but that is around $150 a month that I could be putting in savings and my goal this year is to build up savings as much as I can before my 22 year old car dies. It still only costs around $150-$200 a year for maintenance, i.e. tires every 2-4 years, oil changes 3 times a year, inspection, registration, license, and any parts that need replaced. This year, though, I had to put some plates on my fenders because they rusted through. An extra $200 for that did not empty my savings though.
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singlemomky
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Post by singlemomky on Mar 29, 2012 9:53:29 GMT -5
Money - just wanted to pop in and see if you are surviving all the Final Four craziness that is taking place. Go Cards!!!
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MittenKitten
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Home of the Circus
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Post by MittenKitten on Mar 29, 2012 10:14:26 GMT -5
QOTW: How do you relax and rejuvenate? How has this changed since you became more aware of your money?
COTW: Find a way to relax and rejuvenate that costs nothing. Oh and DO it!
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redwagon
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Post by redwagon on Mar 29, 2012 10:19:26 GMT -5
QOTW: I walk, or do pilates at home. Or make some tea. Or read a book. I shop less. I used to do that a lot to blow off steam.
COTW: Most of the above are free!!
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Mar 29, 2012 10:38:48 GMT -5
My relaxing comes in the form of karaoke, or other musical pursuits.
Even though I have a karaoke machine at home, and cd player, record player, music on the computer, a radio, etc- I get tired of hearing people get an attitude about me singing along in my own home or turning my music up (as the whole time I have lived here I have had my brother's kids most of the time or my mother is now living here. That is one thing I can't wait for with my own larger home.
I can't even cook, watch TV, exercise, etc without someone under foot or "I don't want to watch that".
I think this will get better once the living situation changes. I used to take time to meditate every day while doing yoga- but my mother no longer respects my space and I don't see that changing any time soon.
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azmom
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Post by azmom on Mar 29, 2012 13:18:31 GMT -5
QOTW: I run (T- 3 weeks until I can get back at it) Although running itself is free it is an expensive sport but I've learned how to make it a priority in the budget because it is really my sanity saver. TRUST ME my whole family is counting down the days until I can run again! A truly free activity is blasting the radio and just let my non tune carrying self sing at the top of my lungs and dance! Try it! If you are friends with me on facebook or follow me on twitter you know that MY DD pitched a shut out game, getting six strike outs and went 3 for 3 at the plate. I really wanted to do a blog post on this today because she has only pitched once in like 10 months. On that outing she did horrible and her coach told her he doesn't think she should pitch and she gave up. I didn't know that was why I only knew she didn't want to do it anymore and I supported that decision. I just found out last week the why and so we had a talk and a couple of days ago she threw a couple of pitches just playing around and she did great considering. I made sure to do my motherly duty and praise her and tell her under no circumstances is she to let anyone effect her future. If it is something she wants to pursue she should by working hard and practicing not giving up. Well yesterday I don't know what went down but she was the starting pitcher WITH NO PRACTICE in 10 months. I secretly hate her pitching it scares the crap out of me and its a lot of pressure for her (okay me). I don't tell her this okay. Anyway she was awesome and it looks like we are back to paying for a pitching coach again. (for the record she has the same coach who does an AMAZING job. When he said that to her it was her first season on the team and his first look at her pitch she really did a horrible job and he already had a couple of pitchers on his team. Plus I don't know his exact words to her I only know how she perceived them so I don't blame the coach at all for the record) My NINE YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY post on my blog trumped that. I listed nine marriage tips. Give it a read if you would like and let me know what you think.
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dakota4600
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Post by dakota4600 on Mar 29, 2012 15:36:25 GMT -5
AZmom - Happy Anniversary! I loved your post! Congrats to your daughter too! QOTW- Relaxation is curling up in bed and vegging in front of the TV or with a good book. Rejuvenation is going to work out (I never thought I'd say that but I feel so much better after working out.) Good news! My boss backed me up! Usually I talk to her about something she agrees with me, then when it is discussed in a meeting she changes her position and leaves me dangling. But she didn't, she told our membership director NO! The membership director wanted to go back and issue refunds to everyone who joined in the last 2 weeks, because we have a special that starts on the 1st. She thought it would be nice to give it to them. I said no way and figured my boss would tell me it wasn't that much money just do it. But she agreed with me and said we weren't going to do it. Cool experiment I found on Pintrest. Take and egg and soak in vinegar for about 48 hours (change the vinegar after 24 hours) then rub off the shell gently with your fingers. You get a naked egg, the membrane under the shell stays in tact and it gets a lot bigger, you can see the yolk inside. It is really cool, I keep saying I did for mini-D, but I'm having as much fun as he is. You can carefully bounce it, you can put in corn sryup and "dehydrate" it, then put in water to re-hydrate it and even color the egg by soaking in colored water. Our first one broke while we were bouncing it, so tonight we are going to start soaking it in corn syrup. So far this week it has been NS's for me. Yeah!!
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mizbear
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Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
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Post by mizbear on Mar 29, 2012 18:21:20 GMT -5
Happy Anniversary azmom! Wow on the shut out and glad you will be back to running soon. I will not be running again until more of this weight is off.
dakota- YAY! That feels good when you get som back up.
DM and I went and talked to the first lender today. We can get $65,000 right now, but if we go with a federal program or wait a bit we can get more- which is what our lender is recommending. I have to get hold of taxation and assessments where my old house is because apparently my ex has managed somehow to keep my name on it. The payments have been made in a timely fashion- but my name will need to come off the title. Which he should have done almost 10 years ago when we divorced and I filed bankruptcy on the place. She also found 4 medical bills that were sent to collections. I just recently checked with the hospital billing to make sure. I have had nothing outstanding because I have had insurance and everything was billed to insurance. We are hoping it is a mix up that they can fix and repair quickly.
I am more upset about those bills.
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3catslady
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Post by 3catslady on Mar 29, 2012 21:55:12 GMT -5
update; 27 NSD, 27/31 NEO.
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Mar 30, 2012 0:40:47 GMT -5
I am having an absolute blast in AZ ladies (and gents) and especially with blue. The resort here is gorgeous and we have plenty of time to explore, shop, walk. On shorter breaks we go down to the river to get our feet wet. Today I fell in lol
Tomorrow is a road trip up to the grand canyon - a first for us both and since I bought a charger for my camera battery we're good to go. It'll be nice to break away from the team for awhile. They're great but very intense. Plus they serve a vegetarian diet here and we're both craving meat lol
Anywhosits, just a check into say all is well, Im exceedingly happy and enjoying this trip.
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redwagon
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Post by redwagon on Mar 30, 2012 14:20:01 GMT -5
azmom - I pitched a few games of softball in my day and it is a LOT of pressure. I wasn't consistently good enough and much prefered my safe haven at first base, but it was cool when I did do it. Sounds like your daughter has good stuff! and happy anniversary!
startsmart - glad you're having a great time!!
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Honeylioness
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Post by Honeylioness on Mar 30, 2012 20:05:22 GMT -5
moneysquirrel - Congratulations on your contract renewal.
3cats - GOOD FOR YOU on signing up to complete your writing class! and YEAH for a manager willing to let you have a regular schedule.
azmom - Happy Anniversary to you and great news about your daughter.
start - Glad to hear you are having a good itme.
Next Week: On Tuesday I have an appointment at the day spa down the street. I am going to get a massage, a hair cut (first time in 6 years by a professional), and a mini-manicure. The total cost without tips will be $145 - however I still have a $100 American Express Gift Card from my old boss that I have never used. So most of it will be FREE!!
Interview - I still have not heard back anything from the agency about the position I interviewed for last week. Incredibly frustrating.
QOTW: I like to read. I have an online roleplaying game I play several times a week. I also like jigsaw puzzles, word games, sewing and music.
COTW: I rotate between my job search and some of these online free resources to clear my head.
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Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Mar 31, 2012 21:40:35 GMT -5
Well, I ended the month with 12 NSD's. Not as great as I was hoping for, but not too bad. 39% on average. I think I might track low-spend days next month too. Probably on the $5 range, but I haven't quite settled on a plan yet.
And FWIW, I also like Attentive April!
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