4th grader waking up at night - I'm exhausted!

[Loopdilou]

NQ - I have not watched, but it's on my to-do list for tonight. Thanks for the info!

[KaraBoo]

The necklace/silly band addition is a good idea as well. DD may have subconcious thoughts to think it might actually chock her while she's sleeping. This would do a number on her sleep patterns as well if she's afraid she's not going to wake up.

Definitely try it and see if that works for her - good luck!

[Loopdilou]

Damn subconcious making us all miserable!

[973beachbum]

Jan 14, 2011 9:15:57 GMT -5 Loopdilou said:

She's waking me up because she is awake and is afraid of being the only one awake. Misery loves company. No mention of bad dreams after many questions.

I will watch sugar intake, but that is something I keep very restricted.

Loop we are talking about a 4th grader not a kindergartner right? I'm sorry but at that age she is old enough to know that that is wrong. Assuming nothing is wrong like here being sick or hurt there is no reason for a 4th grader to be waking people up in the middle of the night for no reason.

I am a lifetime insomniac. I will wake up at 1 or 2 AM and not be able to go back to sleep. There has never been a reason. From an early age, maybe 5 or 6, I knew to just lie there quietly or if that was getting unbearable, go down stairs quietly and read a book or watch TV with the volume turned way down.

A child that age is old enough to understand common courtesy of not disturbing others while they are sleeping. I would have a talk with my Dd and see if I could help her with sleeping regularly so it doesn't happen as much but I would also explain that waking up others just because is unacceptable.

[Deleted]

I could be wrong, but I thought people with sleep apnea don't usually wake completely up. I've suspected my Mom had it for years, and she finally talked to her doctor and was diagnosed.

She snores very loudly, and I was concerned because if I was in the room with her, there would be a few moments when she seemed to just stop breathing. Turned out I was right. But she wouldn't wake up completely, she'd go right back to sleep and snoring. She wouldn't even remember the episodes, she just knew she wasn't getting a good night's sleep.

For the ladies with daughters that are having monthly meltdowns, please, please, please talk to your daughters' doctors about it. I've met 2 families, one with a 12yo girl and the other with a 13yo girl. The girls were having monthly meltdowns that were so severe they tried to hurt themselves. I know it's not normally so severe, but I do think it's worth mentioning to their doctor.

Loop, I hope you and DD figure out what's going on and get some good sleep soon!

[mmhmm]

Sometimes, a high protein snack before bedtime will help with this problem. Everything you eat turns to sugar, but different types of foods do so in different ways. Proteins convert more slowly than sugars, or carbs; thus, providing a more even supply of glucose through the night.

It interests me that when she wakes she's afraid of being the only one awake. Kinda makes you wonder if she's having bad dreams and just not remembering them. I don't remember my dreams, and there are a lot of people who don't. Have you asked why that makes her afraid and what she thinks might help with that fear? Maybe a night light, or some other comfort measure would help to alleviate her misgivings.

This may very well be hormonal. It's really hard to say without a full evaluation. It's great that you're concerned and working toward a solution for her. It can't be fun to be waking up in the middle of the night!

[Loopdilou]

Uhh.. beach? You're kinda a douche. I am happy my daughter is coming to me with problems. Problems are abnormalities - not regular occurrences. Problems should be dealt with and solved if possible. Waking up numerous times in the middle of night is NOT normal for her so i'd like to deal with it - not tell her to shut up and keep her problems to herself just so I get a little more sleep

[Loopdilou]

Pink and mmhmm! Great points. Apnea is just a possible cause, but you're probably right about not coming fully awake... nightmares are also a possibility, but she has said she doesn't feel afraid when she first wakes up. She also usually recognizes when she has bad dreams (this is the first time she has ever woken me up with no reason; always has known cause).

[973beachbum]

Jan 14, 2011 10:12:30 GMT -5 Loopdilou said:

Uhh.. beach? You're kinda a douche. I am happy my daughter is coming to me with problems. Problems are abnormalities - not regular occurrences. Problems should be dealt with and solved if possible. Waking up numerous times in the middle of night is NOT normal for her so i'd like to deal with it - not tell her to shut up and keep her problems to herself just so I get a little more sleep

I wasn't be a douche. I was being honest. If that isn't what you want then fine. I won't comment on any of your threads anymore.

[Loopdilou]

Your honest advice was, "tell her to shut up, it's obviously her problem." That's seriously messed up. She's 10 for chrissake. Even if she were 40 that would be messed up.

[Loopdilou]

Alright.. kids are off to school so I am going to increase my sleep hours to 5. Please keep input, that actually involves helping my daughter, coming!

What's funny is that Dark will have no clue about this unless he reads this. Man sleeps through everything!

[zibazinski]

I don't think that was what she was saying at all but after you exhaust the medical reasons, the psychological come into play. Is she angry at you for making her lose weight? My DD was put on, by me, Weight Watchers, and she was very angry at me for making her feel that she was "ugly" and that her present eating habits are ALL MY FAULT. I could see her trying to get back at me by waking me up or in her case, she did a lot worse things. I am sure it is something medical and hope that it gets treated soon. Perhaps just the trip to the doctor will help as it gets her the attention/concern that she may feel is lacking right now. It's amazing that kids feel you don't care about them unless they are perfect. DD was told my her doctor in front of me that she needed to lose weight because of health issues but in her mind, I didn't love her because she was fat. No winning that one.

[Loopdilou]

No reasons have been exhausted - brand new problem! Also, DD doesn't tend towards evil.

[Cheesy FL-Vol]

Jan 14, 2011 10:48:40 GMT -5 Loopdilou said:

No reasons have been exhausted - brand new problem! Also, DD doesn't tend towards evil.

I don't know about that Loop...look at her dad!

[zibazinski]

Tee hee. No one is accusing your DD of being evil but I am sure she is less than thrilled about losing weight. It isn't a picnic for adults let alone kids.

[naggie72]

I remember my girl getting in bed with us until she was around 5, is this something she did when younger?

[Loopdilou]

What I mean is that she knows how to express her anger/frustration/hurt in healthy ways. We're also not focusing on it as a weight thing that she has to struggle with on her own. We are all working on eating better - just need to work on the exercising portion of the equation.

Cheesy - he wishes he were evil

[mmhmm]

You've got a good point, zib. The girl may be feeling insecure right now because of the need to diet and lose weight. While waking mom up to "get back at her" for the diet might be a possibility, it's also possible the little one is just feeling the need for confirmation she's loved ... even in the middle of the night.

[Loopdilou]

Jan 14, 2011 10:55:47 GMT -5 Queen of Interesting Nuts said:

I remember my girl getting in bed with us until she was around 5, is this something she did when younger?

I honestly don't even remember the last time she crawled in bed with us. It's marginally more common for dd2. Even when it was happening it was nowhere near a nightly occurence and waking didn't occur repeatedly over one night - that is really the unusual thing about the last week or so.

[zibazinski]

Thank you. I wasn't putting it right but you nailed it, thank you.

[Loopdilou]

Thanks. That clarifies things (3 hours of sleep is not enough to analyze complex ideas). It is not outside the realm of possibility so I will put it on my list of things to consider. It isn't really like her, but if she's also hormonal who knows??

[josie]

Loop is she napping in the afternoon? Also if she exercises late it could interfere with sleep. She is reaching the age of early puberty so maybe she is hormonal. If she isn't irritable and tired during the day then its possible she is getting enough REM sleep. Some people just don't require the amount of sleep as everyone else. If you are interested, enroll her in a sleep study...they can possibly help determine if her sleep pattern is detrimental to her development or if her health will suffer from her interrupted sleep pattern.

Another thought along the hormonal line is maybe she is becoming sexually stimulated during sleep and is waking up from the unfamiliar sensation.....I know its not something you want to consider happening to your 10 yr old daughter but its not outside the realm of possibility. :/

[zibazinski]

She sounds perfectly normal. Upset about having to lose weight, change her eating habits and lifestyle, not be like "her friends," sneaking food if she can to maybe "get even." You can't watch her 24/7 so what does she eat/do when she's at school or at a friend's house? She won't lose weight until she wants to lose weight no matter what the good reasons are for losing weight and we all know them. Fact is no matter what anyone says, very few people think overweight is great. She knows that and it has to hurt inside, deeply. Add hormones and voila!!!

[westerngal]

Loop, could she maybe be having anxiety attacks about something and that is causing her to wake up? Like maybe listening to the news and hearing about the 9 year old girl killed in Tucson. When Elizabeth Smart was kidnapped, my daughter (who is the same age as her) had anxiety attacks waking up in the night (we live in the same state as Smart) and of course it was on the news and talked about 24/7 . My daughter was so worried about the fact that somebody could come into your home (which is suppose to be safe )and take someone. Just a thought.

[Chocolate Lover]

Loop, my guesses are hormones or maybe her mind's just racing and even though she's sleeping it wakes her up now and then. Mine does that, I've only recently realized what it was waking me up. I've made an effort to be sure I'm not doing the mental to do list as I doze off and it's improved.

[Sum Dum Gai]

Her room is the closest to the furnace, tends to be the hottest, she runs hot anyway which is why she kicks the covers off her bed about half the time, and it's been a little warmer at night this last week. My guess is the thermostat is about two degree too high. She starts either under the covers and gets too hot, which wakes her up. Or not under the covers then gets too cold which wakes her up. Then she goes back to sleep either under the covers or not, and is too hot or cold again a few hours later.

I could be totally wrong, but since I'm on the far end of the house from the furnace and I've been waking up too hot the last couple nights... well.

[Sum Dum Gai]

Then again, sudden onset sleep apnea, puberty hitting a few weeks after her 10th birthday, or emotional ju jitsu because we make her eat healthy all seem a lot more likely...

[Befferz]

Jan 14, 2011 14:18:58 GMT -5 Sum Dum Gai said:

I'm on the far end of the house from the furnace and I've been waking up too hot the last couple nights... well.

Are you having hot flashes, Dark???

[Loopdilou]

Good point honey. Heater setting on list!

[Cheesy FL-Vol]

Actually, Dark, your theory could be pretty valid too.