NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 9:45:00 GMT -5
I think when deciding if something is "offensive" you do need to consider whether it is offensive to others, not just yourself. If you can easily cover it, though, I wouldn't worry about it either way. If that's what you want and you can afford it, then go get it. I don't care for tattoos at all but other people love them and as it's their bodies then they can do whatever they please. I also don't find an artistic representation of the female form to remotely be pornographic. I do wonder, however, if you would be so opposed to your husband's strenuous dislike of this particular image if you weren't so mad at him right now. Is this another way to emotionally separate yourself from him? Yes. We've been butting heads over this type of stuff lately since he lost his job and now "I make more than him". Plus I am currently pissed at his parents for their comments about "not understanding why DH doesn't do something" about our finances when *I* am in control of them. He refuses to tell them that and let's them assume he is the man of the household because "they are old fashioned and they wouldn't get it". I don't care if they don't get it, it's about the truth of the matter. I am not the little woman that DH gets to manage. I am an equal, more than equal, partner in our marriage. If he truly believes that then he should be correcting them and standing up for me not hiding behind 1950's stereotypes. I also have a huge issue with art being considered "offensive" simply because it deals with the naked body. It's a body, so what? I had this conversation with Gwen at the Josyln one time. I get art is subjective and everyone has their own tastes but I noticed that, in general, the "offensive" part tends to come when it's a female form. Why can we have giant naked man statues but a nude female body tattoo is offensive? I can't afford another tattoo right now anyhow, I was just curious what other women thought.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 24, 2020 9:55:00 GMT -5
Yes. We've been butting heads over this type of stuff lately since he lost his job and now "I make more than him". Plus I am currently pissed at his parents for their comments about "not understanding why DH doesn't do something" about our finances when *I* am in control of them. He refuses to tell them that and let's them assume he is the man of the household because "they are old fashioned and they wouldn't get it". I don't care if they don't get it, it's about the truth of the matter. I am not the little woman that DH gets to manage. I am an equal, more than equal, partner in our marriage. If he truly believes that then he should be correcting them and standing up for me not hiding behind 1950's stereotypes. If he won't man up and admit it, then the very next time I was in their presence, I'd be speaking up my ownself. Damned if they'd be making me the villain and letting him off the hook because "they are old fashioned and they wouldn't get it." He gets it and it's up to him to defend you. If it takes your speaking up and embarrassing the living daylights out of him, swell. Do it. My guess is that you wouldn't have to do it twice.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Jan 24, 2020 10:00:48 GMT -5
So debate for your ladies. To relieve stress and get my mind off stuff I've been browsing tattoos because I'd like to get one more to round out the pattern on my arms. I found one of a female budha which I am in love with. DH says absolutely not because the figure is naked. He mansplained to me that the naked female body on my arm is inappropriate and "I am aware that tattoos are permenant right?" (no really I only have three of them already). I pointed out plenty of men have naked women tattooed all over them and nobody says squat. It's not like we're talking a porn spread. The legs are closed, all you can see are breasts. Whoopee. I see bigger more offensive titties every time several male neighbors take off their shirts to mow the lawn. It'd be the same size as my others and on my upper arm so I can cover it up if I needed to. His attitude makes me want it even more. The piece is art. I get really pissed when people treat the female body like it's something gross that needs to be hidden and that I must be "modest". I've decided I want a tattoo that represents my feminist side so now I want this tattoo even more to drive the point home. So setting aside personal opinion on tattoos themselves, anyone else find the idea of a female body tattoo on an actual female body "offensive?" No. Again, he can fuck right off and keep fucking off.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jan 24, 2020 10:13:51 GMT -5
My thought is make sure it's something you want and not a rebellion against your H and/or your circumstances.
I'm not a tattoo person either. I don't get the fascination/urge/whatever though.
I've got whatever bug is going around here and I'm not sure I'm making a lot of sense right now.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 10:23:19 GMT -5
My thought is make sure it's something you want and not a rebellion against your H and/or your circumstances.
I'm not a tattoo person either. I don't get the fascination/urge/whatever though.
I've got whatever bug is going around here and I'm not sure I'm making a lot of sense right now.
I'm not getting anything right now can't afford it. I know I want the fourth one to be about feminism/womanhood but I haven't settled on a design. I happened to find that, liked it and asked DH what he thought. The tattoo hate I get, he doesn't like tattoos but it's my body. What surprised me was the commentary about it specifically in regards to it being a female nude body.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jan 24, 2020 10:25:20 GMT -5
My thought is make sure it's something you want and not a rebellion against your H and/or your circumstances.
I'm not a tattoo person either. I don't get the fascination/urge/whatever though.
I've got whatever bug is going around here and I'm not sure I'm making a lot of sense right now.
I don't have a bug and you made sense to me .
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Jan 24, 2020 13:29:15 GMT -5
I don't care for tattoos at all but other people love them and as it's their bodies then they can do whatever they please. I also don't find an artistic representation of the female form to remotely be pornographic. I do wonder, however, if you would be so opposed to your husband's strenuous dislike of this particular image if you weren't so mad at him right now. Is this another way to emotionally separate yourself from him? Yes. We've been butting heads over this type of stuff lately since he lost his job and now "I make more than him". Plus I am currently pissed at his parents for their comments about "not understanding why DH doesn't do something" about our finances when *I* am in control of them. He refuses to tell them that and let's them assume he is the man of the household because "they are old fashioned and they wouldn't get it". I don't care if they don't get it, it's about the truth of the matter. I am not the little woman that DH gets to manage. I am an equal, more than equal, partner in our marriage. If he truly believes that then he should be correcting them and standing up for me not hiding behind 1950's stereotypes. I also have a huge issue with art being considered "offensive" simply because it deals with the naked body. It's a body, so what? I had this conversation with Gwen at the Josyln one time. I get art is subjective and everyone has their own tastes but I noticed that, in general, the "offensive" part tends to come when it's a female form. Why can we have giant naked man statues but a nude female body tattoo is offensive? I can't afford another tattoo right now anyhow, I was just curious what other women thought. Just for my vote, in case it wasn’t clear, I don’t think it’s offensive or obscene.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 13:52:45 GMT -5
Yes. We've been butting heads over this type of stuff lately since he lost his job and now "I make more than him". Plus I am currently pissed at his parents for their comments about "not understanding why DH doesn't do something" about our finances when *I* am in control of them. He refuses to tell them that and let's them assume he is the man of the household because "they are old fashioned and they wouldn't get it". I don't care if they don't get it, it's about the truth of the matter. I am not the little woman that DH gets to manage. I am an equal, more than equal, partner in our marriage. If he truly believes that then he should be correcting them and standing up for me not hiding behind 1950's stereotypes. I also have a huge issue with art being considered "offensive" simply because it deals with the naked body. It's a body, so what? I had this conversation with Gwen at the Josyln one time. I get art is subjective and everyone has their own tastes but I noticed that, in general, the "offensive" part tends to come when it's a female form. Why can we have giant naked man statues but a nude female body tattoo is offensive? I can't afford another tattoo right now anyhow, I was just curious what other women thought. Just for my vote, in case it wasn’t clear, I don’t think it’s offensive or obscene. No I get where you're coming from on that. I have mixed emotions on Pin Up girls as well. I am not sure how I feel about the whole "reclaiming" a bad word or image or phrase. For me personally I cannot let go of the context, for example when Trump calls women "nasty". I would much rather let his words die with him and find a NEW word to instruct him to shove it up his ass. This wasn't a pin-up it's more an abstract piece but clearly a nude female.
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 24, 2020 14:39:33 GMT -5
At the hospital with dh - either ostomy blockage or infection. At least 50% chance that hes headed into surgery today. Waiting on 4th surgical consult in our efforts to figure out the problem and avoid surgery. This would be surgery number 18. Numbers 1 thru 17 were 2001 to 2011. I hate being back making medical decisions.
FWIW, my therapy work is paying off - I melted into tears last night when surgery was mentioned instead of stuffing my feelings and being a wall. It doesn't make it any easier but it is a much healthier reaction.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jan 24, 2020 14:40:54 GMT -5
Just for my vote, in case it wasn’t clear, I don’t think it’s offensive or obscene. No I get where you're coming from on that. I have mixed emotions on Pin Up girls as well. I am not sure how I feel about the whole "reclaiming" a bad word or image or phrase. For me personally I cannot let go of the context, for example when Trump calls women "nasty". I would much rather let his words die with him and find a NEW word to instruct him to shove it up his ass. This wasn't a pin-up it's more an abstract piece but clearly a nude female.Are you willing to share the image here? No problem if you don't want to do so
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 14:48:43 GMT -5
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jan 24, 2020 14:50:34 GMT -5
Is it the one that looks pregnant?
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 14:53:01 GMT -5
Yeah. I like the second one too but I like the first one better.
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WholeLottaNothin
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Post by WholeLottaNothin on Jan 24, 2020 14:56:31 GMT -5
If so, I like it
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WholeLottaNothin
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Post by WholeLottaNothin on Jan 24, 2020 14:57:36 GMT -5
I got one for my sister last month and am getting one for my father next month. I like them, obviously.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jan 24, 2020 15:03:12 GMT -5
I can't understand why anyone would think that pornographic.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Jan 24, 2020 15:05:43 GMT -5
Cause she's nekkid. I don't get it either. Course my MIL clucks in disapproval at several paintings in Josyln so I guess I shouldn't have been shocked by DH's response.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Jan 24, 2020 15:33:59 GMT -5
My thought is make sure it's something you want and not a rebellion against your H and/or your circumstances.
I'm not a tattoo person either. I don't get the fascination/urge/whatever though.
I've got whatever bug is going around here and I'm not sure I'm making a lot of sense right now.
I'm not getting anything right now can't afford it. I know I want the fourth one to be about feminism/womanhood but I haven't settled on a design. I happened to find that, liked it and asked DH what he thought. The tattoo hate I get, he doesn't like tattoos but it's my body. What surprised me was the commentary about it specifically in regards to it being a female nude body. Well, in that case tell DH that you agree with him and have decided that you will get a tattoo of a naked man, breasts covered. That should take care of the problem...
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anciana
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Post by anciana on Jan 24, 2020 15:57:28 GMT -5
At the hospital with dh - either ostomy blockage or infection. At least 50% chance that hes headed into surgery today. Waiting on 4th surgical consult in our efforts to figure out the problem and avoid surgery. This would be surgery number 18. Numbers 1 thru 17 were 2001 to 2011. I hate being back making medical decisions. FWIW, my therapy work is paying off - I melted into tears last night when surgery was mentioned instead of stuffing my feelings and being a wall. It doesn't make it any easier but it is a much healthier reaction. Many hugs, azucena
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jan 24, 2020 17:06:27 GMT -5
Hugs azucena.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Jan 24, 2020 17:14:30 GMT -5
I hope you get some good news azucena. I know you and your DH have been through a lot already.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jan 24, 2020 19:43:41 GMT -5
At the hospital with dh - either ostomy blockage or infection. At least 50% chance that hes headed into surgery today. Waiting on 4th surgical consult in our efforts to figure out the problem and avoid surgery. This would be surgery number 18. Numbers 1 thru 17 were 2001 to 2011. I hate being back making medical decisions. FWIW, my therapy work is paying off - I melted into tears last night when surgery was mentioned instead of stuffing my feelings and being a wall. It doesn't make it any easier but it is a much healthier reaction. Many hugs, azucena Yeah that. ((((Hugs))))
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azucena
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Post by azucena on Jan 24, 2020 20:09:47 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs.
He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep.
And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jan 24, 2020 20:29:46 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol. Hugs Azucena!
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Jan 24, 2020 20:35:41 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol.
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bean29
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Post by bean29 on Jan 24, 2020 20:51:18 GMT -5
Acuzena-Hugs, hope all goes well.
Drama-I honestly don’t find that attractive at all. I would be beside myself if one of my kids was getting that. DS has several tatoos, and they don’t bother me, but that would bother me.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 24, 2020 21:17:48 GMT -5
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Jan 24, 2020 21:20:05 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol. Sending lots of hugs
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Jan 24, 2020 21:52:36 GMT -5
Dh has been in surgery a couple hours with likely a couple left to go. The whole thing is surreal. I've slept maybe 3 hours since I work up for work at 5 am on thurs. He likely ends up in ICU overnight where I'm hoping they keep his pain under control so we can both get some sleep. And what i wouldn't give for a shower right now lol.
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ners
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Post by ners on Jan 24, 2020 22:01:49 GMT -5
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