raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 9, 2019 12:12:32 GMT -5
Nephew is due to arrive today by c-section, but they're not scheduled till afternoon and don't want visitors until they're in a room so early evening. I'm thinking of holding off until tomorrow to go visit but I feel like dh and his parents are going to lose their minds if I don't go today. I can't wait to see the baby and am super happy for sil/bil, but we're not their support system. She doesn't need me and there are going to be a ton of people clammering to hold the baby. So I know all the reasons it would be okay for me to wait, but I also know how it will be viewed and I'm torn. Dh and I also had the first 'are we over' conversation last night (that went no where) and he's fragile so I feel like if I don't go I'm making his life harder.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 9, 2019 12:17:11 GMT -5
Hugs Rae.
If you do go visit, can you just pop in and out? Like 10 minutes?
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 9, 2019 12:27:15 GMT -5
I'm sure I can. It's not that I don't want to see them. During rush hour the hospital is 35-45 minutes one way which isn't awesome. I offered to come by and pick up the kids so dh can stay longer (thinking they'd go before I'm off work) which I still think is the best option. He is always surprised that we might do things separately and insists the kids will be fine. I also offered sil to come over later this evening and stay late and snuggle the baby while her and bil try to get some sleep but she didn't take me up on it.
So we'll see. On a selfish note I'm frustrated to miss my classes tonight, but the more I think about it I have to go tonight. Not for sil or baby, but for the other stuff. Which is fine.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Dec 9, 2019 12:32:43 GMT -5
I had no idea scarlet fever was still a thing. Here's to a speedy recovery.
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Dec 9, 2019 12:42:34 GMT -5
Hugs, rae.
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Dec 9, 2019 13:19:15 GMT -5
Both of my kids got scarlet fever at different points in their lives. With my older, DD, I reacted exactly as you did. She was 4 and a little off her game, Then she developed the rash, and after that, a fever by the time I got her to her pediatrician. She did complain that nothing tasted good including a red popsicle. That's how I knew she was sick.
DS got it on the day we were leaving Disney headed home. I loaded him up with ibuprofen, said prayers and got him to the pediatrician as soon as we landed.
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Dec 9, 2019 13:43:35 GMT -5
Yep... that's why, although i'm not generally pro rushing to the doctor, if i even suspected strep we went for a culture. eta: This was not a dig at you mom! It can be hard to tell strep and there are lots of things we don't know till we experience it! Oh, I didn't think it was a dig at all! I have never had strep and neither have my kids. From what people have said, it's like knives when you swallow - and Harper didn't complain about a sore throat at all, so I totally thought it was just a stomach thing! Now I know - puking can be a sign of strep, if you don't have diarrhea with it (I thought that part was odd over the weekend). I now know for next time!
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steph08
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Post by steph08 on Dec 9, 2019 13:44:21 GMT -5
Both of my kids got scarlet fever at different points in their lives. With my older, DD, I reacted exactly as you did. She was 4 and a little off her game, Then she developed the rash, and after that, a fever by the time I got her to her pediatrician. She did complain that nothing tasted good including a red popsicle. That's how I knew she was sick. DS got it on the day we were leaving Disney headed home. I loaded him up with ibuprofen, said prayers and got him to the pediatrician as soon as we landed. Harper also complained that some things didn't taste good - like a popsicle, but I figured it was due to throwing up and general blahness (but she ate crackers and some chicken pot pie just fine without complaint...). Now I know!
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oped
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Post by oped on Dec 9, 2019 14:52:02 GMT -5
Worst case of strep I ever had the vomiting was insane... I was still in high school... caught it from a rugrat I was babysitting... that gig is so not worth it...
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 9, 2019 15:09:56 GMT -5
I really think C had strep for months at the end of last school year. The sore throat wasn't ever a big deal and no fever which really threw me off.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 9, 2019 16:51:48 GMT -5
Anxiously waiting for baby news...
ETA...dh's parents got a picture. 4lbs 8 oz. Looks like a cutie.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 9, 2019 18:58:53 GMT -5
Welp that worked itself out, but not how I would have liked. No visiting tonight. SIl had a bleed and ended up back in the OR. She's out now but all visitors have been kicked out for the night. We're assuming everyone is okay, and sil/bil wanted to have time to recoup without the circus which is probably a good call. Hopefully will have more info soon.
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andi9899
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Post by andi9899 on Dec 9, 2019 19:03:23 GMT -5
Hopefully she's ok. Fingers crossed!
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alabamagal
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Post by alabamagal on Dec 9, 2019 21:07:32 GMT -5
Welp that worked itself out, but not how I would have liked. No visiting tonight. SIl had a bleed and ended up back in the OR. She's out now but all visitors have been kicked out for the night. We're assuming everyone is okay, and sil/bil wanted to have time to recoup without the circus which is probably a good call. Hopefully will have more info soon. I hated hospital visitors after I had babies. I just passed a large object out a small hole, missed some meals, no sleep, no shower, hospital gowns. And c-Section would have been worse. We didn’t have local family, but a few friends stopped by. My real close friends were ok, but the rest was definitely awkward.
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Dec 9, 2019 21:25:43 GMT -5
Welp that worked itself out, but not how I would have liked. No visiting tonight. SIl had a bleed and ended up back in the OR. She's out now but all visitors have been kicked out for the night. We're assuming everyone is okay, and sil/bil wanted to have time to recoup without the circus which is probably a good call. Hopefully will have more info soon. I hated hospital visitors after I had babies. I just passed a large object out a small hole, missed some meals, no sleep, no shower, hospital gowns. And c-Section would have been worse. We didn’t have local family, but a few friends stopped by. My real close friends were ok, but the rest was definitely awkward. Yes! My (make) boss (!!), our female team coordinator, and two male coworkers came to the hospital to visit when M was born. She was born by c/s, and it was the day we were headed home, but I was still uncomfortable. And the stress of trying to make sure she didn’t need to nurse while they were there because that’s not something I wanted to do in front of them with a newborn who is still figuring out how to nurse. I would never in a million years tell my boss because he truly meant well, but yeah, I’ll never go visit a coworker in the hospital if they just had a baby.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 10, 2019 6:20:08 GMT -5
Baby is doing well and it sounds like SIL is doing okay, but I expect she'll need a blood transfusion today. I know she wanted to get home quick, and that's so much harder with 2nd children because you don't want to leave your oldest for long, but I hope she can rest and recover as much as possible. He's so tiny! We bought several preemie outfits for them and dropped them off over the weekend and I have a feeling they're going to need them. He's less than half the size my babies were, and he's early of course, but he wasn't going to be a big one at 40 weeks either.
Dh got annoyed that even though his parents said they were getting kicked out at 5, he talked to his mom and they were just barely leaving at 7. SIL asked her mom not to leave so dh felt like she'd be upset he wasn't there. I was like no...sometimes you want your mom. And just your mom. Dh let them know that if they needed anything that didn't deliver he'd be happy to bring it to them, no visit necessary and will offer that to them this morning to bring good coffee and breakfast.
I loved hospital visitors because there wasn't any way or reason for me to host them. Come in, see the baby, snuggle the baby, bring the baby to me when he/she cries while I sit here and eat everything I can. Once we were home I always felt like I needed to be doing something. I also lost all modesty in the hospital. We only had family and a couple close friends come by. Admittedly it was all of our families both times around, but no coworkers. I imagine that would be quite different.
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Dec 10, 2019 9:38:52 GMT -5
I'm trying to buy new sneakers (with velcro) for my 7 year old DD on Amazon and not having any luck. The 13.5 is too small so I'm trying to order the next size up (1 or 1.5) but every pair of shoes goes from 13.5 to 3.5 with nothing in between. Have they resized shoes and now 3.5 is the smallest of the Big Kid sizes?
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finnime
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Post by finnime on Dec 10, 2019 10:22:02 GMT -5
I'm trying to buy new sneakers (with velcro) for my 7 year old DD on Amazon and not having any luck. The 13.5 is too small so I'm trying to order the next size up (1 or 1.5) but every pair of shoes goes from 13.5 to 3.5 with nothing in between. Have they resized shoes and now 3.5 is the smallest of the Big Kid sizes? Since I was just there, I checked and Zappos has the sizes you're looking for. FYI
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tcu2003
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Post by tcu2003 on Dec 10, 2019 11:48:39 GMT -5
I’ve seen those sizes in stride rite.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Dec 10, 2019 13:12:52 GMT -5
I'm trying to buy new sneakers (with velcro) for my 7 year old DD on Amazon and not having any luck. The 13.5 is too small so I'm trying to order the next size up (1 or 1.5) but every pair of shoes goes from 13.5 to 3.5 with nothing in between. Have they resized shoes and now 3.5 is the smallest of the Big Kid sizes? Have you tried Target? DD wears a size 1 and she has a Velcro shoe we got from Target.
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NastyWoman
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Post by NastyWoman on Dec 10, 2019 14:06:55 GMT -5
If all goes well I'll be in Munich in 10 days around this time being picked up at the airport by DS2 and DGS1
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 10, 2019 14:35:15 GMT -5
For all my fellow "Nasty women" on here I am currently reading this book
The Seven Necessary Sins for Women and Girl by Mona Eltahawy.
I checked it out from the library but as I read I have decided I am going to buy it and then make the girls read it as they get older. It captures EXACTLY how I feel not only recently but every time a guy in school told me I was "too assertive" and every time someone asked DH when *I* would be quitting to take care of the girls after Abby was born.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Dec 10, 2019 21:55:16 GMT -5
I got to hold the baby for hours! He's so tiny. Sil is sore and tired but didn't need a transfusion. So good to see them.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 12, 2019 8:32:52 GMT -5
Landed myself in hot water last night. After 15 years together I finally decided to tackle DH's gift giving. He is one of those people that either buys you what HE thinks you should want or will buy you 20+ items related to what you want but you don't want that stuff and forgets what you did want.
I have to be careful saying I like something. Say I see a cow cookie jar that would look cute in my collection. He'll go out and buy enough stuff to decorate the entire house in cow AND have me wearing cow related items for the rest of my life but there will be no cookie jar to be found. But "you said you like cows".
Then one year I dropped a thousand hints about how much I wanted the Greenberg's version of a Pandora bracelet (way cheaper). What did I get? A $75 manicure kit because a slick sales guy at the mall convinced him that is what women REALLY want. I work in a lab, manicures are destroyed in seconds and I can't wear nail polish/fake nails because of contamination risk. I ended up having to get myself the bracelet.
I just want something I actually want. I want him to listen to me and in 15 years show he freaking actually knows me. I put A LOT of thought into the gifts I get other people and I'd like him to do the same for once.
I don't want a "surprise" because that's what is fun for HIM. Yes I can buy what I want myself and so can you (or at least you could) but I also know there are things I want that I often talk myself out of buying, like that charm bracelet. Getting that bracelet from DH with a charm or two he picked out just for me would have been really special. He knocked it out of the park when he got me a necklace with the kids' names on it to give me when I had Abby, do stuff like that!!
And I am aware of how ungrateful I sound. I do not act this way when he gives me the gifts but last year when he got me about $300 worth of useless Star Wars crap that all went on the credit card because I asked for R2-D2 measuring cups I kinda had enough yanno?
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flamingo
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Post by flamingo on Dec 12, 2019 8:49:39 GMT -5
NomoreDramaQ1015, my DH is very similar. He buys buys buys all sorts of crap just so we have a ton of presents under the tree. I don't want $50 worth of dollar store crap, I want a fancy pair of slippers that cost $50. Whhyyyy is it so hard for him to understand that I'd rather have 1 gift I actually want than 100 that are just cluttering up our drawers (b/c let's be real, all of the crap he was buying was getting shoved in a drawer so I didn't have to keep seeing it). Finally, a few years ago, I managed to put a stop to it. We now set a $$ limit (this year it's $50 b/c we are going on vacation). And I've turned it into a bit of a competition (who can find the best gifts at that price point, ie, put some thought into it). I also create an Amazon wish list that I've shared with him so all he has to to do is buy exactly what's on that list. After the first year he did that, and saw how happy it made it, he was like, wow I'm really good at giving gifts. LOL. Anyway, I don't know if that helps in any way, but I wanted you to know you aren't alone in gift giving/receiving hell.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 12, 2019 9:17:26 GMT -5
NomoreDramaQ1015 , my DH is very similar. He buys buys buys all sorts of crap just so we have a ton of presents under the tree. I don't want $50 worth of dollar store crap, I want a fancy pair of slippers that cost $50. Whhyyyy is it so hard for him to understand that I'd rather have 1 gift I actually want than 100 that are just cluttering up our drawers (b/c let's be real, all of the crap he was buying was getting shoved in a drawer so I didn't have to keep seeing it). Finally, a few years ago, I managed to put a stop to it. We now set a $$ limit (this year it's $50 b/c we are going on vacation). And I've turned it into a bit of a competition (who can find the best gifts at that price point, ie, put some thought into it). I also create an Amazon wish list that I've shared with him so all he has to to do is buy exactly what's on that list. After the first year he did that, and saw how happy it made it, he was like, wow I'm really good at giving gifts. LOL. Anyway, I don't know if that helps in any way, but I wanted you to know you aren't alone in gift giving/receiving hell. OMG YES!! I have to sneakily donate it because if he catches me I will never hear the end of it. If I kept every piece of crap he bought me we'd end up on Hoarders. I've given him lists and begged him to please stick to the list. "Well that's not fun because then you know what you are getting". That's the damn point! So this year I was finally "mean" about it. I told him I've tried subtle, I've tried nice and I STILL get hundreds of dollars worth of crap and if I am lucky what I wanted is buried in there. I am done.
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cktc
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Post by cktc on Dec 12, 2019 9:48:00 GMT -5
@nomoredramaq1015 that does sound frustrating! DH is pretty good about getting me stuff I want, but usually about 2 years after I drop the suggestion. Still waiting on a cricut. Should just buy it myself. On another note, have you seen Groove Bags science shoes? You were the first person who popped in my head when I saw them. I've no experience with the company, but the shoes look pretty fun. If they made them in kids sizes I'd probably order like 5 pairs for DS. www.groovebags.com/collections/science
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gs11rmb
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Post by gs11rmb on Dec 12, 2019 9:58:44 GMT -5
@nomoredramaq1015 that does sound frustrating! DH is pretty good about getting me stuff I want, but usually about 2 years after I drop the suggestion. Still waiting on a cricut. Should just buy it myself. On another note, have you seen Groove Bags science shoes? You were the first person who popped in my head when I saw them. I've no experience with the company, but the shoes look pretty fun. If they made them in kids sizes I'd probably order like 5 pairs for DS. www.groovebags.com/collections/scienceThose are amazing! I just sent that link to some of my science colleagues
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Dec 12, 2019 10:05:47 GMT -5
I have not seen them but now that have I want a pair.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 12, 2019 10:23:07 GMT -5
I want the cloth tote bags! I think I'm getting one for the White Elephant thing with my family. My one niece loves dachshunds. And she will definitely steal it, once she sees it.
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