973beachbum
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Post by 973beachbum on Apr 21, 2011 13:25:18 GMT -5
Schools make way too much of this when they want to. My DD has a cell phone that we gave her so we can get in touch with her to coordinate after school activities. It is a convience for us and her. She is not allowed to use it, per school rule, during class or anytime except at lunch. That's the rule. 9 out of 10 times when someone is texting or checking their phone in class it is a teacher not a student. How can someone even enforce that rule with a student when they them self were just braking it 5 minutes ago? The only times my DD has broke it was when a teacher told her to. the teachers, rightly, assumed that sometimes parents would like to know about a schedule change in time to plan for it. Ironically my Dd has almost always actually been complying with the rule that the turned off cell must be in the locker so she didn't even have it on her at the time. At which point she had to leave class and go get it and the teacher made a point to say keep it in your purse instead. Sometimes you can't win for losing.
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hoops902
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Post by hoops902 on Apr 21, 2011 16:28:27 GMT -5
"My point is that cell phones are a huge convenience. But, for kids, they are neither a necessity nor an entitlement." I'm with you on this. If my kid got his phone taken away for texting in class, I'd tell him to start saving his money for a new one because he wasn't likely to get that one back. Do people not have neighbors anymore? If I was concerned about my kids I would just ask a neighbor to check on them. Which works great only if your neighbors don't have jobs.
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AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP
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Post by AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP on Apr 21, 2011 19:15:30 GMT -5
I disagree very strongly with the school asserting a right to violate his right to privacy. The school is an extension of the government, and this isn't his locker (their property), it's HIS personal property. They have every right to make the rule, and even to confiscate the phone, but it's alarming that they would assert a right to search his private effects. I guess they're just softening the kids up to OBEY WITHOUT QUESTIONING authority.
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Post by ty on Apr 21, 2011 19:33:06 GMT -5
"My point is that cell phones are a huge convenience. But, for kids, they are neither a necessity nor an entitlement." I'm with you on this. If my kid got his phone taken away for texting in class, I'd tell him to start saving his money for a new one because he wasn't likely to get that one back. Do people not have neighbors anymore? If I was concerned about my kids I would just ask a neighbor to check on them.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Apr 21, 2011 19:37:00 GMT -5
How is a private school an extension of the government?
From the time I was in 9th grade on we had to call home after school. Before that I was stuck with the babysitter bc my brothers were younger. Parents wouldn't go for leaving us. Of course that is the year my stepbrother hit junior high which was right by our house practically. Our elementary school was about 4 miles across town. My youngest brother got enrolled in ymca before/after school care until he went to the junior high the following year.
If we did not call my stepmom by the time we should have been home she was calling us. I still know that number by heart. Can't tell you what my work number is or my prepaid cell but I know that one. I haven't had a landline since I moved out of the dorms. Not knowing numbers got me once and I try to know the ones I call all the time now.
I had a phone when I started driving bc I was in so many activities and plans do change. It was always on silent during the school day and texting wasn't a big thing in 2001-2002.
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AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP
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Post by AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP on Apr 21, 2011 20:00:44 GMT -5
Ahh, didn't catch that it was a private school. In either case- is this policy (of going through text and email history) WRITTEN someplace? I'd ask to see the policy if you haven't already.
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AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP
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Post by AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP on Apr 21, 2011 20:04:59 GMT -5
And I agree about the helicoptering. Between homework- right after school, and dinner- I was GONE. I was usually several blocks away at the park playing ball, or racing my bike on a dirt track we made in the "woods" (vacant lot), or sledding at a hill near the grocery a mile or so away...I just knew I had to be home for dinner at 6:30. My parents generally had NO IDEA where I was (nor did they particularly care).
Everything is so 'structured' now. Kids are rarely out of sight, they have "play dates", and birthday parties, and scouts, and music lessons, and soccer, etc. but they're rarely just "playing outside".
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Apr 21, 2011 20:16:32 GMT -5
We could go out and play once we checked in. We just needed to be back at 5:30 to check in again when the parents got home and dinner was usually shortly after so that was homework time as well. I'll freely admit my stepmom might have been a bit of a control freak. We could walk the dog after dinner and you could be all over town as long as you were walking the dog and we only needed to be home in time to get showers and get ready for school the next day.
She said it was a private school and this was the policy she agreed to. Taking it away and fining is one thing but it disturbs me that the kid asked to call his mom and they said no especially given the kid's issues. She has said she is going to post her cell number at their house for him but it just rubs me the wrong way that the school would refuse such a request from the kid.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Apr 21, 2011 20:34:42 GMT -5
"She said it was a private school and this was the policy she agreed to. Taking it away and fining is one thing but it disturbs me that the kid asked to call his mom and they said no especially given the kid's issues. She has said she is going to post her cell number at their house for him but it just rubs me the wrong way that the school would refuse such a request from the kid."
This is what the kid SAID. We don't know what actually happened. IF it is true, I'd be having a chat w the headmaster.....
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cubefarmer
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Post by cubefarmer on Apr 21, 2011 21:20:07 GMT -5
Well, I start working from home next week, so I will be here when he gets home, so I won't need him to "check in" anymore. I did not say anything to the school. I tend to support anything this school does because for the most part it is really great school - great teachers, great adminstrators. So today I asked him if he paid to get his phone back and he said he went to the secretary, handed her the money, she reached into the BOX OF CELL PHONES and picked his out and gave it to him. They didn't read anything in the phone. I bet he never ever texts in class again.
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❤ mollymouser ❤
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Post by ❤ mollymouser ❤ on Apr 21, 2011 23:45:09 GMT -5
I've never texted.
And I have a landline.
And my neighbors have actually come over to check on me when my wonderful DH was out of town and worried about me.
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azphx1972
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Post by azphx1972 on Apr 22, 2011 3:23:04 GMT -5
If I had a special needs child, I would absolutely have a landline, and ensure that all my contact numbers (and those of close family members) are preprogrammed into the speed dial. Cell phones are way too easy for kids to lose, get damaged, or run out of battery juice at the most inconvenient times.
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Post by ty on Apr 22, 2011 11:33:10 GMT -5
"She said it was a private school and this was the policy she agreed to. Taking it away and fining is one thing but it disturbs me that the kid asked to call his mom and they said no especially given the kid's issues. She has said she is going to post her cell number at their house for him but it just rubs me the wrong way that the school would refuse such a request from the kid." This is what the kid SAID. We don't know what actually happened. IF it is true, I'd be having a chat w the headmaster..... I doubt they denied him a phone to call his mom. He just wanted his cell phne back to call his mom and they said NO. His mom would have probably asked why he why he wasn't calling her with his cell and "oops" busted. He would have a lot of splainin to do later as to why he was breaking the rules in class and texting other students.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Apr 22, 2011 11:57:10 GMT -5
I'm old and old-fashioned. Cell phones didn't exist when I was growing up. We carried the dime in the shoe for the pay phone if we needed help.
I work at a church 4 hours a week. This school year, the local music classes are using the church while their building is undergoing renovations. The teacher told me that cell phones in school and in class is out of control. I heard her make the kids put all the cell phones on a table while they took a test. She told me they text answers to each other.
I can not imagine what teachers go through in the days of this technology. We had to write answers on our hands and hope it was the right one! I didn't even do that. I was one of the kids who never wanted the teacher mad at me.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Apr 22, 2011 12:00:31 GMT -5
theotherme when is the last time you saw a payphone? I never see payphones anymore, even the last one that was by Ashley Lynn's and the dry cleaners is now gone. The movie theatre used to have one but that is also gone. Zoo used to have one but that was taken out and in it's place is an ATM machine. I don't think people need to be tapped into their cell phones 24 hours a day you can wait till you get home for most things, but to say that "I carried a dime for the payphone" doesn't really apply when there are no payphones around anymore. Plus last time I used a payphone calls were 50 cents a piece.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Apr 22, 2011 12:19:39 GMT -5
"Cell phones didn't exist when I was growing up. We carried the dime in the shoe for the pay phone if we needed help."
Yep, remember "penny loafers"?? Only we had dimes in them....:-)
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Apr 22, 2011 19:50:14 GMT -5
I realize it is very difficult to find a pay phone, but I also don't think kids need to be attached to their cell phones 24/7, which they think they do. As somebody else in this thread said, even when they get together as a group, they are texting--not talking.
Yes, my dime was usually in my penny loafers!
I do have a cell phone and it does have texting on it. I use the pay as you go for the texting. I only have a landline because it was cheaper to get the internet with the phone than without the phone. When the year is up, we shall see what happens to the rate.
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daylight
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Post by daylight on Apr 23, 2011 15:36:12 GMT -5
OP is right, the school should have allowed the phone call under the circumstances. I'm not sure how I feel about the reading of text messages etc. I mean, back in the time when we did not have cell phones in, if you wrote notes during lessons, and you got caught, chances were that the teacher *did* read the note. You knew this, you accepted this. I fail to see how a text message is different, except that it probably costs more than a scrape of paper. And if the note was long, the teacher could read it all, so... Acknowledging that special need kids have special needs, I admit I am a bit concerned about how overprotective some posters are about their kids. I don't have kids yet, and I know it's better to be safe than sorry, but I can clearly remember how I never ever needed to check-in with my parents. Both worked at least until 4.30pm and my sister and I were home around 4 from elementary school, and I was home by as early as 1 pm on some days from age 10. And none of my classmates had to check-in either. Some had SAHMs, or had an in-law living with them, but most of us went home, did homework, played and somehow managed not to off ourselves until the parents came home. I would expect the same from my own children.
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AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP
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Post by AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP on Apr 26, 2011 1:54:12 GMT -5
Time for the kids to put passwords on their phones, just sayin'. After all, the boy might have broken the rules, but the privacy of everyone who texted him is at risk too. They didn't break the rules and did not consent to have their messages read. Indeed. There's just a creepiness factor about the whole thing...
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AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP
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Post by AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP on Apr 26, 2011 1:55:45 GMT -5
theotherme when is the last time you saw a payphone? I never see payphones anymore, even the last one that was by Ashley Lynn's and the dry cleaners is now gone. The movie theatre used to have one but that is also gone. Zoo used to have one but that was taken out and in it's place is an ATM machine. I don't think people need to be tapped into their cell phones 24 hours a day you can wait till you get home for most things, but to say that "I carried a dime for the payphone" doesn't really apply when there are no payphones around anymore. Plus last time I used a payphone calls were 50 cents a piece. Right before payphones went extinct, I remember things like "Please deposit 50 cents for the fist one (1) minute...
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michelyn8
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Post by michelyn8 on Apr 26, 2011 4:45:34 GMT -5
Ok, time for a routine change. Your son needs to be calling you when he gets home from school, not you "texting" him. The routine in my house when my kids were still in school was for them to pick up the phone and call me as soon as they walked in the door. They did not have cell phones until my older daughter's senior year. If they didn't call by a certain time, I started making calls to find out if there was a bus delay.
Stop using your son's learning disability as an excuse to baby him. He's smart enough/responsible enough to have a cell phone to text, he's smart enough/responsible enough to keep up with your cell number. If he can't remember it, post it by the house phone (IMO if he has learning problems, a list of numbers should have been posted for him long before he turned 16). If he's in a special school to be more functional, then expect him to be that way. Kids tend to live up to our expectations no matter their condition.
Do not just take his word the school wouldn't let him call. Teenagers, even honest ones, are good at deflecting blame off themselves. Call the school and ask to verify his story in a non-confrontational way.
I'm one who doesn't have an issue with the school's policy. To many kids break school cell phone policies and there needs to be consequences. Kids are there to learn, not text their buddy two rooms down. This policy is no different than our client's policy claiming the right to search my vehicle is they feel they have cause. Do I like it - not really but its their property and their rules. You chose that school for your son, you receive their policies at the beginning of each year so you can't complain now that your child got caught breaking a rule both of you knew existed.
And for everyone who is upset about the policy to read text messages, I liken this to the teachers reading notes they caught us passing in class. No different, just now its on a phone and not on a piece of notebook paper.
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runewell
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Post by runewell on Apr 26, 2011 8:59:52 GMT -5
He has to pay $15 to get it back. I'm surprised nobody has mentioned this. Sure, some discipline might be needed for repeat offenders. But why should the kid have to pay $15 to get his phone back. Schools must really be in dire financial straits...
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