Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 26, 2013 15:55:54 GMT -5
"Not bad/abusive parents, but parents who if divorced and only see their kids every other week, are happy with the arrangement because they like the "break." "
I know people like that and it just doesn't sound right. I don't want to take a break like that from my kid, EVER.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Mar 26, 2013 16:03:43 GMT -5
"Not bad/abusive parents, but parents who if divorced and only see their kids every other week, are happy with the arrangement because they like the "break." " I know people like that and it just doesn't sound right. I don't want to take a break like that from my kid, EVER. Well, I'll be the bad parent that wants a break. I just want to pee in my own home in private and sleep for at least 4 hrs straight.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Mar 26, 2013 16:23:54 GMT -5
I think that's different mutt, especially when you're sleep deprived with a newborn.
Dh and I have agreed that neither of us could be a "part time" parent and go days without seeing our kids, regardless of how we felt as a couple, we both want to be there for the kids daily needs and activities.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Mar 26, 2013 19:34:09 GMT -5
I think that's different mutt, especially when you're sleep deprived with a newborn. and for at least 4 hours of sleep tonight!
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on Mar 26, 2013 22:29:09 GMT -5
And I know I'm going to mommy hell for this one, but apparently I am the only parent on the planet who does not find it endlessly fascinating to observe every minute of my sons' practice of _______. Fill in the blank with any social, musical, athletic or scholastic activitiy. And even though someone mentioned the dance recitals... let's be brutally honest here. I do enjoy the approximately 5 minute period of time in which my son is performing but have zero interest in the other 2.5 hours of watching random children doing something their thing.
Milee, aren't your sons still young? It gets better as they mature, lots better. I was blown away tonight at the HS concert. The orchestra switched to their "alternative genre" and did all rock: Sweet child of mine, I feel free (Cream), Can't always get what you want, Purple Haze, and Kashmir. They found a drummer, added an electric guitarist (one of the violinists), all the bassists brought their electric basses, anyone who had an electric instrument switched to that, added pickups on the cellos. They also created a light show behind them and the spotlight was on the mirror ball above the stage. They all wore either concert shirts or tie-dye instead of the usual black concert dress, and lots had aviators/bandannas/spiked hair. Some of them changed Ts between songs. They were amazing, especially Kashmir! "I love my job (happy sigh)" is what the director said before introducing Kashmir. On the way home, DS4 was telling me all the things that had gone wrong that no one noticed: the director's music had gone missing in the mad dash to change concert dress between ensembles, so he conducted from memory w/ a little peeking at the 1st violinist's music, the guitarist had broken ribs from a sledding accident, the pickup amp for the cellos had a funky connection, and DS4's rock stop had gone AWOL in the mad scramble so he had to keep his cello up between his knees all concert...
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happyscooter
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Post by happyscooter on Mar 27, 2013 8:37:05 GMT -5
1. That I would love my kids as much as I do. 2. That I am actually capable of murder if someone harms my children/grandchildren.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 8:45:59 GMT -5
"Not bad/abusive parents, but parents who if divorced and only see their kids every other week, are happy with the arrangement because they like the "break." " I know people like that and it just doesn't sound right. I don't want to take a break like that from my kid, EVER. Well, I'll be the bad parent that wants a break. I just want to pee in my own home in private and sleep for at least 4 hrs straight. I'm also a bad mommy as the 3 day trip to FL and the 2 day overnight to Boston were welcome breaks for me. I wouldn't want to be missing for half of DS's life and I do think about him while I'm apart from him, but a day or two here and there without him doesn't really bother me much.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 8:55:42 GMT -5
Well, I'll be the bad parent that wants a break. I just want to pee in my own home in private and sleep for at least 4 hrs straight. I'm also a bad mommy as the 3 day trip to FL and the 2 day overnight to Boston were welcome breaks for me. I wouldn't want to be missing for half of DS's life and I do think about him while I'm apart from him, but a day or two here and there without him doesn't really bother me much. Were those your first overnights without DS? I know you were having trouble leaving him when you wanted to go to the Poconos for a night.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 8:58:49 GMT -5
I'm also a bad mommy as the 3 day trip to FL and the 2 day overnight to Boston were welcome breaks for me. I wouldn't want to be missing for half of DS's life and I do think about him while I'm apart from him, but a day or two here and there without him doesn't really bother me much. Were those your first overnights without DS? I know you were having trouble leaving him when you wanted to go to the Poconos for a night. no. I am thinking my first overnight without DS was when I drove down to my mom's when our marital issues came to a head, but I can't be sure.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Mar 27, 2013 9:23:34 GMT -5
"Not bad/abusive parents, but parents who if divorced and only see their kids every other week, are happy with the arrangement because they like the "break." " I know people like that and it just doesn't sound right. I don't want to take a break like that from my kid, EVER. Well, I'll be the bad parent that wants a break. I just want to pee in my own home in private and sleep for at least 4 hrs straight. Hell yes. And I'd like to be able to eat a meal in peace once in a while, while it's at the correct temperature. NOw part of this is our lack of meals at the kitchen table and I get that it's on me to change that. But even when we DO eat at the table, it's a constant litany of the kids needing more milk, more napkins, a clean piece of silverware, more food or whining about what food there is.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 9:25:09 GMT -5
Well, I'll be the bad parent that wants a break. I just want to pee in my own home in private and sleep for at least 4 hrs straight. Hell yes. And I'd like to be able to eat a meal in peace once in a while, while it's at the correct temperature. NOw part of this is our lack of meals at the kitchen table and I get that it's on me to change that. But even when we DO eat at the table, it's a constant litany of the kids needing more milk, more napkins, a clean piece of silverware, more food or whining about what food there is. Stop spying on us during dinner, but you forgot the needing to clean the milk that was spilled as soon as the glass was filled.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Mar 27, 2013 9:29:11 GMT -5
Hell yes. And I'd like to be able to eat a meal in peace once in a while, while it's at the correct temperature. NOw part of this is our lack of meals at the kitchen table and I get that it's on me to change that. But even when we DO eat at the table, it's a constant litany of the kids needing more milk, more napkins, a clean piece of silverware, more food or whining about what food there is. Stop spying on us during dinner, but you forgot the needing to clean the milk that was spilled as soon as the glass was filled. Lidded cups with straws. Brilliant and limits the amount of spilled milk to a trickle.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 9:31:27 GMT -5
we're still on the sippy cup, but if he can't sit it up right himself or if we don't take it fast enough, it gets thrown which spills some. Also now food he doesn't want gets thrown back at us. And God forbid you break his crackers for him!!!
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Mar 27, 2013 9:37:56 GMT -5
We still use a sippy cup too. Actually DS is stil in the high chair. We need to get him a booster seat soon so his sister can have the high chair.
And if anyone was wondering, no I did not get 4hrs straight of sleep last night. DD decided it was fun to coo at me while I was trying to fall asleep.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 10:46:39 GMT -5
"I'm also a bad mommy as the 3 day trip to FL and the 2 day overnight to Boston were welcome breaks for me. I wouldn't want to be missing for half of DS's life and I do think about him while I'm apart from him, but a day or two here and there without him doesn't really bother me much. " Oh I dont think that makes you a bad mommy I was talking about missing half of your kid's life. Not a day here and there for sanity purposes
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 11:43:33 GMT -5
There will come a day when you can say, if you don't like it... Make something for yourself just hang in there...
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 11:45:16 GMT -5
And on that note, I'm going to go with a cliche... I'm surprised at how fast it all happens... It might not seem like it at 3 am on the third week of colic (etc)... But it's going so much faster than I realized it would....
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 27, 2013 11:46:40 GMT -5
I'm surprised at how much personality I thought they had at birth, and 1 years old. But now they are real people. And soon they will be teenagers, and then adults. Will they be as different 10 years from now as they were 10 years ago?
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milee
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Post by milee on Mar 27, 2013 11:48:34 GMT -5
There will come a day when you can say, if you don't like it... Make something for yourself just hang in there... {Milee's voice wafts up from the fiery depths of Mommy Hell...} Um, I guess that's why by the age of 3 both my kids could make sandwiches, eggs, cereal and a half dozen other meals. They could also get their own extra napkin or pour themselves some more milk. I cook 98% of our food from scratch and spend a significant amount of time doing so. Once it's served, I'm sitting my tired ass down and eating.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 11:50:22 GMT -5
dang, Milee, you run a tight ship/
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milee
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Post by milee on Mar 27, 2013 11:51:56 GMT -5
dang, Milee, you run a tight ship/ Maybe too tight. At age three was also when the younger one started getting up early to make coffee for daddy. Maybe we're taking this independence thing too far?
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 27, 2013 11:52:53 GMT -5
I use this on a very limited basis. I could see this degrading into one kid eating the same thing, 3 meals a day. I could also see it becoming a dinner nightmare, with everyone making something different for themselves, and us never eating together.
Eating a piece of chicken won't kill you. Just sit down and eat. Tomorrow we will eat something else, and maybe you will be happy then.[/span]
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 11:57:32 GMT -5
I use this on a very limited basis. I could see this degrading into one kid eating the same thing, 3 meals a day. I could also see it becoming a dinner nightmare, with everyone making something different for themselves, and us never eating together. Eating a piece of chicken won't kill you. Just sit down and eat. Tomorrow we will eat something else, and maybe you will be happy then. [/span][/quote] I remember my mom stabbing my brother in the legs with her fork because he was refusing to eat his peas. Oh the memories.
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muttleynfelix
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Post by muttleynfelix on Mar 27, 2013 11:58:25 GMT -5
And on that note, I'm going to go with a cliche... I surprised at how fast it all happens... It might not seem like it at 3 am on the third week of colic (etc)... But it's going so much faster than I realized it would.... I think that is what is making the bad days easier to deal with with DD. I know how quick this will go by and it will be over before I know it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 11:58:30 GMT -5
I don't care if we all eat different things. Most kids will eventually get tired of things, and since I buy the ingredients, I still have some control. These days, with me doing this food test thing, whole days go by when we never eat the sme food... Although we try to sit down at the same time with some regularity...
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 27, 2013 12:02:05 GMT -5
Good idea! Although, my kids both love peas. Maybe this will be how they learn to love fish. [/span]
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 12:03:21 GMT -5
He never learned to love peas. He hates them to this day.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 12:03:59 GMT -5
Bet his feelings toward your mother are complex as well....
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Mar 27, 2013 12:04:20 GMT -5
So does my sister. She's wrong. Peas are delicious.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 27, 2013 12:06:18 GMT -5
Bet his feelings toward your mother are complex as well.... oh yeah.
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