Deep, Dark Secrets... kind of...

[Deleted]

I didn't want to post this on the other thread, because honestly I don't want to trivialize the topic of that thread.

But I was thinking it might be interesting to share our version of deep dark secrets. Not horrible ugly things, but things that we might not tell all of our friends/neighbors/family...

I'll go first. Before I had kids I had a piercing most people didn't know about...

[milee]

Oh, no secrets here.... (Remember, denial is a wonderful thing!)

[Deleted]

Come on! Play. Its fun...

I wasn't sure if I should do this thread or one entilted "Can we talk about pot for a minute"... to follow up my p0rn one from a few weeks ago... cause son asked me the 'come clean' question the other day as to my past experience with it... and I wondered if people had been/planned to be up front with their kids... (and on a side note have I said lately how excited I am to have teenagers....)

[Deleted]

Ok. Some of you might make it into a short story now and again, but its not like i'm published anywhere .. and I'd change your names, obviously...

[Deleted]

I would never blab anyone's secret.

[swamp]

I don't have any secrets. Im boring.

[midjd]

Shyeah! Like I'm gonna confess anything to this group. Y'all have memories like elephants.

[swamp]

No, I"m serious. I'm boring.

I used to drink too much, but never did anything really stupid and never hurt anyone or myself. I've smoked pot, but that's not exactly a secret or rare.

[Deleted]

wrongside, definately his choice. But I know its hard not to 'what if' situations like that. '

I had a DUI once. Haven't really had much to drink since then. I honestly thought I was ok to drive. That was before kids. Would never have forgiven myself if something had happened.

[Peace Of Mind]

Sept 27, 2012 14:22:26 GMT -5 @wrongsideof30 said:

Mine is ugly...

When my long term boyfriend left me for someone else, I was very hurt and VERY angry. So, I immediately started dating his best friend. His best friend was in a relationship at the time, but he always had a crush on me so when he got the opportunity he dumped his girlfriend and started dating me. I swore up and down that he wasn't a rebound, but he was and he really started to get on my nerves. When I finally broke up with him he freaked out. He was super upset. He went out drinking. He was drinking and driving. He got into a car accident and killed someone. He went to jail for several years.

It's really hard to think about. I try not to.

How very sad. But you can't control others reactions and I hope you know it's not your fault that he did that.

My deep dark secret is I was once arrested for disorderly intoxication. ;D

[Deleted]

I don't think i will play since you are all trying to track down what state i live in.

[Peace Of Mind]

I know it's not Florida.

[Deleted]

You don't know that. I have ways of being incognito.

[Taxman10]

Sept 27, 2012 14:01:58 GMT -5 oped said:

I didn't want to post this on the other thread, because honestly I don't want to trivialize the topic of that thread.

But I was thinking it might be interesting to share our version of deep dark secrets. Not horrible ugly things, but things that we might not tell all of our friends/neighbors/family...

I'll go first. Before I had kids I had a piercing most people didn't know about...

that is your deep dark secret??

that's piss poor.

my secret is I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die

[swamp]

Sept 27, 2012 14:40:08 GMT -5 @shooby said:

You don't know that. I have ways of being incognito.

that's in Florida, right?

[Deleted]

Reno is in Florida?

Hey... I have now shared two... I think some of the readers on here need to ante up...

[Formerly SK]

Sept 27, 2012 14:22:26 GMT -5 @wrongsideof30 said:

Mine is ugly...

When my long term boyfriend left me for someone else, I was very hurt and VERY angry. So, I immediately started dating his best friend. His best friend was in a relationship at the time, but he always had a crush on me so when he got the opportunity he dumped his girlfriend and started dating me. I swore up and down that he wasn't a rebound, but he was and he really started to get on my nerves. When I finally broke up with him he freaked out. He was super upset. He went out drinking. He was drinking and driving. He got into a car accident and killed someone. He went to jail for several years.

It's really hard to think about. I try not to.

I'm the oldest of four. Our parents were lousy. When I was in my early 20s my parents divorced and my mom announced she was done raising kids and we now had to take care of her (my youngest sib was 10). I said fuck that and bolted (there was A LOT of insanity going on including extensive criminal activity). My brother (late teens) stepped up to the plate and tried to deal with it all, and it really messed him up. It's been about 20 years since then and he has destroyed his life (meth/heroin addictions). He'll never have any kind of normal life. Part of me knows that if I had stayed involved and helped shoulder the burden he might be better off now. But OTOH I'm pretty sure I would not be where I am today if I had stayed in contact. It definitely feels like I fled a burning building and left him behind. I have a lot of survivor's guilt.

[Sum Dum Gai]

OK, I'll play. On the two lies and a truth thread that Firebird started awhile back all three of mine were true.

ETA - Hope some stalker was keeping notes because I'm not going to go find the thread.

[milee]

Sept 27, 2012 14:54:44 GMT -5 Formerly SK said:

Sept 27, 2012 14:22:26 GMT -5 @wrongsideof30 said:

Mine is ugly...

When my long term boyfriend left me for someone else, I was very hurt and VERY angry. So, I immediately started dating his best friend. His best friend was in a relationship at the time, but he always had a crush on me so when he got the opportunity he dumped his girlfriend and started dating me. I swore up and down that he wasn't a rebound, but he was and he really started to get on my nerves. When I finally broke up with him he freaked out. He was super upset. He went out drinking. He was drinking and driving. He got into a car accident and killed someone. He went to jail for several years.

It's really hard to think about. I try not to.

I'm the oldest of four. Our parents were lousy. When I was in my early 20s my parents divorced and my mom announced she was done raising kids and we now had to take care of her (my youngest sib was 10). I said fuck that and bolted (there was A LOT of insanity going on including extensive criminal activity). My brother (late teens) stepped up to the plate and tried to deal with it all, and it really messed him up. It's been about 20 years since then and he has destroyed his life (meth/heroin addictions). He'll never have any kind of normal life. Part of me knows that if I had stayed involved and helped shoulder the burden he might be better off now. But OTOH I'm pretty sure I would not be where I am today if I had stayed in contact. It definitely feels like I fled a burning building and left him behind. I have a lot of survivor's guilt.

Sometimes you can only save yourself. While there's a chance your staying might have helped your brother, there's also a big chance it not only wouldn't have but would have ended with you being dragged down into the pit as well.

You didn't start the fire and you can't blame yourself for running out of the burning building. Love your family and yourself and don't be hard on either one.

[whoisjohngalt]

You know my real name, no way I am sharing.

[Deleted]

Sept 27, 2012 15:36:54 GMT -5 whoisjohngalt said:

You know my real name, no way I am sharing.

awwwwwwwww... common, John.

[Formerly SK]

Thanks Milee.

[❤ mollymouser ❤]

Not only do we have digital cable in the family room, we even have it in the guest room. (gasp!)

[Deleted]

Definitely what milee said SK !

[milee]

Sept 27, 2012 16:24:16 GMT -5 ❤ mollymouser ❤ said:

Not only do we have digital cable in the family room, we even have it in the guest room. (gasp!)

OK, I have a really dumb question. We finally did get cable (DH said the FIOS bundle was the best internet, yada, yada...), but we only have one TV so excuse the ignorance.

If you have cable or FIOS, does it only work on one TV? You have to pay extra for more TVs?

[Epiphany]

after finding and reading a gazillion pages of postsecret I wrote a few of my own privately to keep - it's therapeutic and scary at the same time to put them on paper (or computer).

When I was 15 I dated an senior in high school, he was abusive in many ways and it led me down a dark path of self loathing/anorexia. I got out and he tried to kill himself because I left him with pills. He had to have his stomach pumped and almost died. His family blamed me. It's taken me a long time to heal from those wounds at such a volitale age. My dh knows the overall story. Recently a guy who my ex hung out with started working with my husband and remembered me. Brought back a lot of pain.

Here's a couple of not so crazy ones I wrote about myself:


I’m afraid sometimes to get closer to God because I’m scared He will call me to do something I don’t like or far away and it draws me away from you.

I hate the fact you don’t like art and feel like I amputated part of myself to ignore the artistic part of myself. I will work on doing that alone and it’s ok.

I’m really nice to fat people even though I judge them terribly because I know so many people hate the fact I’m skinny.

I’m still terribly afraid of the dark. Someone or something will be there to get me as soon as I turn around.

I’m scared I’m going to be more like my mom and end up unable to control the crazy. I don’t think you’d put up with me.

I secretly love when you work late so I can have the house to myself

I care more about dogs than babies and see nothing wrong with that.

geez... am I oversharing or what???

[northdakotanice]

I (somewhat unknowingly) caused myself to go into premature labor when I was pregnant with my first child, he was born 2 days later and died. I'd been quite active my whole pregnancy with no medical restrictions. One night after work I decided to go for a bike ride (prior to that I hadn't ridden a bike for about a year). I thought to myself "Gee. I hope riding bike isn't dangerous to my baby..." . The next morning i ended up in the hospital because I was dilating. Nobody in my family knows that I pretty much caused my baby to die, except my DH who was riding bike with me. Two days after we lost the baby, I saw an episode of 'Scrubs' where Turk and Carla were expecting a baby and Carla commented that she couldn't ride an exercise bike because it would put too much pressure on her cervix. Wish I'd seen the episode a few days earlier

[Formerly SK]

North - I'm so beyond sorry for your loss.

[movingforward]

I am pretty much an open book so I don't have many secrets. There is really only one that most people don't know, but it is no big deal. When I was in college I dated brothers at the same time. One was a freshman and one was senior. They pretty much had different friends and different lives. I was able to get away with dating both of them for 3 months before they found out they were dating the same girl. I was embarrassed about dating them both at the same time and didn't want them to find out so I never told anyone except my college roommate (who gave me a high five). I would probably never do that now but it was fun at the time

[northdakotanice]

Thank you, SK. I still feel guilty about it, five years later. My mom had similar pregnancy issues, so I'll never know if it was bound to happen to me anyway or if I truly did cause it to occur.