How much do you make? How much did that cost?

[gsbrq]

May 25, 2011 13:34:14 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

A manager complimented me on not being favorable to certain tables and I told him that I've found I make more by NOT being favorable than singling out table

I found the same thing. I still got stiffed from time to time, but overall I always did better than the ones who thought they could tell ahead of time who would be good tippers.

[NoNamePerson]

If someone asked me how much I made I would just reply "I don't do surveys"

[kgb18]

I'm not funny about money so those kinds of questions don't bother me. I don't usually ask other people about those kinds of things. I have a few close friends/relatives that I talk about money with, but other than that I don't bring it up. If someone asked me I wouldn't be offended.

[formerexpat]

How much do you make?:

I generally say 65% of what I would make if the government would keep their hands out my pocket. My mother knows the range of what I make but nobody knows exactly what I make. I don't even thing my wife would be able to say how much I make with salary and bonus and I know she wouldn't know my "total compensation" as a business views the cost of an employee, inclusive of insurance, employer taxes, etc. I bet most people don't even know their own total compensation.

How much did that cost - I generally tell them because I shop for sales, so never pay full price and prices for material goods can generally easily be found out so it's not like I'm keeping anything a secret. I've already told a number of people how much the Sienna we just bought cost...I told them that we got it for under invoice and that we decided not to get the DVD player & sunroof from the dealer because we got it done at a place for less than the cost that the dealer wanted to charge us.

Shit, I'll gladly tell people when I've saved money!

[Knee Deep in Water Chloe]

Mrs. Dinero, please understand that I completely respect your opinion on your reaction to these types of question, even in regard to not wanting to tell your children. I just simply disagree. What you want to do with yourself is your business. I hope my questions and comments are not coming across as attacks. I do not intend them to be, just financial discourse.

Both my salary and my husband's salary are public information. My husband's salary was printed in articles about him in three different newspapers last May when he changed school districts. That's probably why my perspective on this subject is a bit different from everyone else. We choose to be public employees.

I do not ask people how much money they make or generally how they afford stuff. I will certainly ask how much a trinket or bauble cost but not big ticket items. ETA: I'm usually just interested in how much something cost at a particular place so I can decide where I want to purchase it or if I want it at all.

I do not keep it a secret that I'm a frugal person. Of course, that's because I don't tend to control my facial expressions well and I cringe when I have to spend money, even the $3 for a gallon of milk

[domeasingold]

Do you ever get compared to another person. I mean for instance a member of family. Especially when you are the one that has had some success in life compared to a sibling who has it a little tough, especially today. I believe you are responsible for your own family and providing the best possible. Am I right? Not that I have ever refused to help. I make a respectable sum but I did not buy a McMansion, a Mercedes, or a summer home. But I do go on a decent vacation every year.
I make good money because I worked for it by getting a good education in my field, working beyond expectations, with integrity and honesty. I will not tell you what something cost because you should have a pretty good idea what it costs anyhow. Just don't ask to make me feel guilty if that is what you are trying to do.

[AgeOfEnlightenmentSCP]

May 25, 2011 11:31:31 GMT -5 Mrs. Dinero said:

Do you find these questions rude? Not so much on this board but in real life.

What do you think? and how do you respond?

Not if they're prefaced by the obligatory, "If you don't mind me asking..."

But seriously, I don't mind the how much did that cost as much as the "how much do you make?". The latter is just plain tacky, IMHO-- as is, btw, saying so-- especially if you're broadcasting how much you make unsolicited.

[Waffle]

Tacky is a very good word for it. But one of the reasons I love this board is that you can talk about these kind of things as openly as you want here without it being perceived as tacky. As least, I don't think most posters here would think those things would be tacky here on the board.

[Mardi Gras Audrey]

I don't generally mind answering those questions as long as they as are asked for good reasons (like information). I think that education/information sharing on financial matters is very important and can help our country to get have a little better perspective on what they can/can't afford. When we veil financial issues in secrecy, it makes people unable/uncomfortable when they try to get information that can really help them. I think we saw a lot of that during the housing boom..people didn't know enough about what they were getting into and didn't know what questions to ask. Additionally, most people (in my humble experience) seem to be friends/family with people with similar financial situations. So if they don't know anything about finances, their friends/loved ones don't either and they can't ask a stranger because it is rude, where do they get information from? The Internet? (Maybe accurate, may not), the salespeople (who have a vested interest in selling the product...not making sure it is the most appropriate for the client), etc. I think it does a disservice to the community and creates impossible expectations where you think you can keep up with the Jones and afford what they have even though you don't know that Mr. Jones saves $9k a year couponing, and they had a relative gift them $100k for a downpayt on a house, and Mrs. Jones makes $80k a year as a nurse while you make $40k, have no rich relatives, and don't coupon..

[klopy]

Re: How much do you make? How much did that cost?
« Reply #38 Yesterday at 11:06pm »

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I don't generally mind answering those questions as long as they as are asked for good reasons (like information). I think that education/information sharing on financial matters is very important and can help our country to get have a little better perspective on what they can/can't afford. When we veil financial issues in secrecy, it makes people unable/uncomfortable when they try to get information that can really help them.

Good point!

[jd2005]

"How much do you make?" - Rude if you don't know me...somewhat rude if you do.

"How much did it cost you?" - Not rude at all IMHO. If you really want to know, my SL are on display at networthiq.com.

[ihearyou2]

I'll talk cost all day but I think how much you earn is rude and have never been asked it.

[spartyparty]

If someone asks me a question I don't feel like answering, I just tell them it's none of your frickin' business!

[Firebird]

How much do you make?

Depends on the context. I honestly don't mind amongst friends if we happen to be discussing money and it comes up. It would be weird/rude/tacky/whatever for someone to just ask me out of the blue, or in front of other people, but that's never happened and I can't think why it would.

Actually, there was one time I did decline to answer that question. A few years back my mom and I were visiting her family and she mentioned my new job and asked me right at the table, "How much are you making again?" I didn't mind the question and with a different group of people, I might have even answered it but I declined because I thought answering would be rude. I was, at that point, earning more than anyone else at the table had ever made in their lives, and I was the youngest by far. I thought it would come across like I was bragging.

I just said "I'm doing okay" and changed the subject. I guess it could have been construed as rude, but I didn't take it that way.

[Tred]

When someone asks how much I make, my answer is "There are only a few people who know the answer to that question, and I intend to keep it that way."

Some people have taken that to be a rude response, but I think it's rude to ask in the first place. I don't hold it against them later.

[kimax]

May 25, 2011 13:20:09 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

...I've made the mistake of telling people and then they go "Is that all?!"

LOL...I can definitely relate. A cousin once asked and I received the same response when I told him how much I made when I was working in a biomedical research lab (many years ago). Since then, I got an MBA and transitioned to a new career, earning significantly more than when I was in a lab. (I guess I should give my 2 cents in the STEM thread)

Now, when someone asks how much I make, I respond "Unless I'm married to you or you're my accountant or HR at my office, you don't need to know."

As for how much something costs, I'll answer depending on the intent of the question, i.e. "I'm interested in purchasing X, how much did you pay for it?" vs. "That must have been expensive, how much did you pay?"

[thyme4change]

For the most part, finding out pricing on most stuff is pretty easy. I just told y'all how much I paid for my car - but any of you could have googled the car and come within a few hundred bucks, and so can my friends.

I did have people ask how much I spent when we did home remodels. You can't really get a feel for how much contractors cost without either hiring one, or being nosy. I am usually open with people if I think their intentions are not nefarious.

[Deleted]

I ask my friends, "what'd that set you back?" I hope they don't think it is rude.

For some reason, coming from Archie, I find that charming.

[Cookies Galore]

Aside from parents, I can't recall every being asked how much I make. When it comes to how much something costs, I'm normally the to volunteer that info, especially if I got a good deal.

[debtheaven]

Aside from parents, I can't recall every being asked how much I make.

Same here. My dad asked me my salary at my first two jobs. But I live in France and frankly nobody here would ever think of asking anybody what they earn.

I don't have a problem with friends asking me how much we paid for something. We are not spendy but we spend most of our disposable income on either travel or home improvements. So if a friend asks me the price of something, I know it's because they are thinking of taking a similar trip or thinking about a home renovation, and I share freely.

[Cookies Galore]

Yeah, my Dad is my financial superhero, so I'm comfortable talking about salary and benefits with him. My Mom? I don't give her the whole picture because there's always the possibility of her asking for money.

[debtheaven]

Here's the other side of the coin: I was very curious as to DS1's salary when he got his first job last year. (He's 24, he was 23 then.) I knew what it was ball-park because he told me what starting salaries were in his field as he was finishing grad school. But I've lived here long enough that I wouldn't dream of asking anybody that question, even my own son, and we are VERY close.

Last time he came home we went out to lunch, just the two of us (as we do every time he comes home.) I knew he had had two raises since he was first hired. He happily told me what he was earning, and explained his company's pay system in detail. I have to admit, I was very happy that he shared that info with me. But I didn't ask, he offered. And that made me feel good.

Other thought: DS1 is VERY savvy. With two of my four kids, I COULD imagine asking, when the time comes. Not out of curiosity (which is what it amounted to for DS1, which is why I refused to ask), but to make sure that they have really thought about whether that salary can cover whatever lifestyle / expenses they are planning, and hopefully help guide them as they start out.