Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 17:49:57 GMT -5
A friend's relative was in a bad car accident last week and she's still unconscious. Amongst other things, she has a brain injury, and they can only wait and see what happens. The relative is single with 2 sons in their early 20's. The family agreed for my friend to be the one to make sure the relative's bills are paid. But she can't find any recent bills or bank statements, so she doesn't know what needs to be done. The relative is a pack-rat and kind of unorganized I think. My friend feels horrible about invading her relative's privacy trying to find the information.
My friend knows that there's a mortgage on the house that's been in the family forever, and she knows that the payment is automatically withdrawn from the relative's checking account. It was an ordeal just to find out if she needed to deposit money in the account to cover the mortgage payment.
That got me to thinking of my own situation. Those that don't have spouses, have you told a trusted friend or relative where they could find the pertinent information? What about your bank accounts? They can't use the relative's money to pay her bills; her bank accounts are inaccessible because they're in her name only.
Has anybody here actually planned for someone to be able to handle their finances in a situation like this? What's the plan?
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on May 19, 2011 17:53:24 GMT -5
Shoot, I've got a spouse and I'm not sure I would know where all the info I would need is. I think everything is in a specific address book, but I'm not sure it's up to date. I imagine there would be a late payment or two before I got a handle on everything.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on May 19, 2011 17:57:37 GMT -5
I've also got a spouse, and I'm pretty sure if something were to happen to me, things would be a mess!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 18:08:04 GMT -5
I've also got a spouse, and I'm pretty sure if something were to happen to me, things would be a mess! I've got a spouse, and I KNOW if something would happen to me, things would be a mess. (car accident 1999 - DH held down the fort as best he could....)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 18:10:17 GMT -5
Oh dear! Even the married folks are no help. LOL
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Loopdilou
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Post by Loopdilou on May 19, 2011 18:31:15 GMT -5
Dark should be ok as long as he remembers my email password - most of our bills are electronic and come there. If he doesn't he's screwed. I'd be fine though... once I get his life insurance check anyway
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on May 19, 2011 18:32:39 GMT -5
Well, I've got a spouse who would be clueless, SO here's what I did. In our Will book (a white binder with copies of our wills, power of attorneys and healthcare directives, I have a sheet of paper titled "How the bills are paid". It lists each bill, the amount, the due date, the frequency and how it's paid (write a check, auto on the cc, or auto out of the checking acct)
At the bottom of the page is a list of the accounts with #'s, web addys, user id's and passwords.
DH and son both know wher to look if I get hit by a trunk.....
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on May 19, 2011 18:33:38 GMT -5
I'd be fine though... once I get his life insurance check anyway The question in the OP said coma, not dead. Unless you're planning on pulling the plug on me.
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schildi
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3718 and no text
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Post by schildi on May 19, 2011 18:38:37 GMT -5
Loopdilou is Dark's mate, did I understand that correctly?
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on May 19, 2011 18:41:00 GMT -5
Yeah, she's the poor bastard I tricked into being stuck with me for life... uh, I mean, yes that's my adoring wife.
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❤ mollymouser ❤
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Post by ❤ mollymouser ❤ on May 19, 2011 18:43:35 GMT -5
I've got everything organized and labeled and filed and organized ... if anything happens to me, my wonderful DH should be able to figure things out. And if anything happens to him ...well, I do all the bills and paperwork, anyway.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 18:47:43 GMT -5
I created a password protected computer file with all of my account information, but I have yet to tell anyone it exists or what the password is. I should probably get on that.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 19:01:51 GMT -5
I suppose my biggest concern as far as bills go, is that my mortgage get paid. My kids could point somebody in the right direction on that.
But nobody would be able to access my money to pay it or take care of my kids and dog. That worries me the most I think, because I wouldn't want my family to have to worry about my expenses in addition to their own. I'm just not sure what (if anything) to do about it.
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qofcc
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Post by qofcc on May 19, 2011 19:02:16 GMT -5
DH knows my bank account password. All of the bills are automatically paid from checking, there's $15K in overdraft protection that would kick in if necessary in case he was too busy to deal with it for a few months. I'm sure he'd figure it out eventually after a month or 2 of statements. I also have a detailed spreadsheet of all of our financial info on a flash drive in my briefcase assuming that wasn't in the car accident.
My dad is currently in the hospital recovering from a car accident. He's conscious, but not much help and I've had to take over all of the bills and I had to go over to his apartment and organize all of his papers and get all of the info required to apply for Medicaid. This is exhausting.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 19:13:14 GMT -5
qofcc, oh no! I hope your Dad gets better soon.
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Post by debtheaven on May 19, 2011 19:30:40 GMT -5
My DH is a total ditz about anything financial or the actually running of this house. He is a foodie so I'm sure that nobody would starve to death. But I sometimes worry that if I disappear the gas, water and electricity will all get cut off. Or that the paid-off house will get foreclosed upon because he won't pay property taxes.
I think DH would be smart enough to go to our credit union, our banker knows everything, it's all on one account. And EVERYTHING but the water bill is on autopay. And if he's not, well, frankly, maybe he deserves to sit in the dark LOL.
I've told him our password countless times, I'm sure he still doesn't remember it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 19:33:56 GMT -5
QofCC my best wishes for a speedy recovery too.
I'm pretty organized. Our records are color coded and alphabetized. While I may be a little A-R I have to be. We have too much going on. That said, no guarantee DH can figure it out. I explained the records to him before and these long trips are good practice. However most of the bills are automatically paid and since DH set up my e-mail accounts he knows my various passwords.
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qofcc
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Post by qofcc on May 19, 2011 19:34:55 GMT -5
qofcc, oh no! I hope your Dad gets better soon.
thanks, transferring him to a nursing home for rehab tomorrow. It's been 2 weeks since the accident and he's yet to have his feet on the floor.
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Post by debtheaven on May 19, 2011 19:35:54 GMT -5
I'm sorry qocc. I hope he gets better soon, I know this situation is very stressful for you.
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azphx1972
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Post by azphx1972 on May 19, 2011 19:49:21 GMT -5
Sorry to hear about your dad, qofcc. Hope he gets on his feet soon.
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cael
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Post by cael on May 19, 2011 20:11:18 GMT -5
This is kinda the situation my mother was in when my grandfather died. He didn't have anything organized or easy to find or anything, my grandmothe had dimentia so she had no clue. Grampy also had a lot of assets and accounts and stuff... Mom spent lots and lots of time going thru paperwork in the house to find things and pulling her hair out. It is an extremely good idea to have plans or directions or something.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 20:17:15 GMT -5
I'm thinking it wouldn't be difficult to figure out what to do if I died. Not so much if I'm still here, but unable to even communicate.
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Post by bobbysgirl on May 19, 2011 20:24:39 GMT -5
I have things set up simply. Two relatives know everything, so what one forgets the other may remember. If I die, which would be my choice rather than a coma, it is even more simple.
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DVM gone riding
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Post by DVM gone riding on May 19, 2011 20:35:16 GMT -5
I've told mom where the books are with the passwords, acct lists etc. Plus I collect and file paperwork like crazy so maybe it would be screwy for a month or two but I hope she would figure it out. I am much more concerned about what happens if something happens to mom, I know dad is clueless and I know at one point in time she had a list but I don't know where or how many accts. I know where to start though because I know which bank has the majority of her accts and can follow the trail from there.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on May 19, 2011 20:36:50 GMT -5
QoCC, best wishes for your dad (and Pink, for your friend's relative) It seems that a lot of people (including me) have pretty solid plans for when they die, but less for if they are severely injured. If I were in an accident, DH knows how to find the document with all our accounts/passwords (though I'm not sure he'd have the wherewithal to worry about it for a month or two). If both DH and I were in an accident... geez. I suspect MIL would at least make sure the mortgage was paid and the animals fed, but there's no guarantee - and she'd have to do some privacy-invading (she hates that) to figure out where we bank, etc. I may need to do something about that.
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Malarky
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Post by Malarky on May 19, 2011 20:38:29 GMT -5
DH could probably figure it out before the house was foreclosed on. I hope. I occasionally tell him how much money we have and where it is, and he just doesn't care. I think he understands my password system, but who knows? The kids are old enough and smart enough to go live with the neighbors if need be.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 19, 2011 20:41:17 GMT -5
Malarky: LOL
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on May 19, 2011 20:43:53 GMT -5
My niece and nephew have been told they each get half my 401K if I die before retirement when I will roll the money over. So if I died now they would have to contact my employer to find out how to get the money. My mortgage and other bills are set up to pay from my bank. If my bank runs out of my money it will do a margin loan on my brokerage account. The cable tv and cell phone and insurance are paid on a credit card but only the credit card minimum payment is automatic.
I plan to have a list of websites and passwords and keep it on a thumb drive and might have an old one misplaced at home. My mom has a copy of my will and my will at home has a letter saying what to do with my stuff like clothes go to charity and keepsakes to my niece. Mom will inherit the house and knows to give my boyfriend the furniture and stuff.
When I retire I will get a living trust to keep the house and investments in so I can set up a life tenancy for my boyfriend and some kind of allowance to supplement his pensions and SS. The remainder of the estate will go to my niece and nephew or maybe their parents or kids. So they should be willing to manage the trust if they get some leftover money.
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jeffreymo
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Post by jeffreymo on May 19, 2011 20:54:23 GMT -5
I have a memory stick that is attached to my key chain that has every important piece of our financial picture in a series of excel spreadsheets. After reading through some of the other responses on this thread, I will: 1. password protect the file that contains logins/passwords 2. tell my wife
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motherto2
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Post by motherto2 on May 19, 2011 21:51:10 GMT -5
I am single and have all the wills, power of attorney, medical directive, etc. taken care of. All of my bills are on auto payment except my water bill, but that comes in the mail. I have a notebook at work that has all my accounts, account no.s, phone no.s, and addresses in it. It's very secure there. My biggest problem is I don't have anyone else on my bank account. I was always hesitant about putting DD (she's the oldest) on my account. While she's a good kid and responsible, we all know how money changes people. i'd hate to think she would do something inappropriate, but it's all the money i have. I recently found out I could put someone on there in case of my death. I've considered doing that but I have a newer problem in that my mother seems to be starting with some sort of dementia (undiagnosed). She is the one named on my estate and all of my papers. I had thought about putting my stepdad on at the same time, but that's a long story (not against him). But now I have the dilema of how to put his name on things without her going off (which I think is part of the dementia). DD just turned 22, so she's starting to get of an age where she could handle it. And since DS is 18, I don't have to worry quite as much about the ex getting a hold of money to "take care" of his expenses.
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