The kid thread: Planning, pregnancy & parenting

[econstudent]

Jan 19, 2011 23:14:44 GMT -5 @kjsh said:

Second question - anyone know what will happen to my supply if I start to do two feedings per side before switching? I need to call the LC tomorrow about this, but I'm afraid I won't get around to it. I did it for four feeding sessions yesterday (cause I think DS had a fore/hindmilk imbalance) and DS was far less fussy this morning then he had been. I switched back to regular alternating bre.asts per feeding and this evening he got very fussy and spit up a lot again. It could all be coincidence, but I think I want to try the two feedings per side schedule again.

My breastfeeding book says to feed off of one side until it's totally softened. If that takes more than one feeding, that's okay. You do want to make sure that he's getting the hindmilk, so that's a good way to do it if he isn't getting it all at once. I think your supply will be fine as long as you are still nursing regularly...maybe offer him the same side again a little later rather than waiting for him to "ask." If I can't get Maggie to completely empty one side in one feeding, I try her on it again a little later (rather than waiting for her to be really hungry) so that the other side isn't all engorged before we get around to using it.

If you haven't gotten it yet, I highly recommend the book The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It's by the La Leche League people, and I have found it to be very helpful.

hope that helps!

edit to add: I just saw in your post about being sick and not wanting to get too close to him...since you are breastfeeding him, you don't need to worry about this. You pass immunities to him in your breast milk for whatever you catch. You're building his immune system by being sick!

[econstudent]

gusita--I understand feeling possessive. I'm fine with other people holding her for a while, but then I get jealous of the cuddling and want her back. Fortunately she is used to nursing very often when she is with me, so quite often she starts opening her mouth on them for milkies and they quickly hand her back.

[alphayankee]

While being with Avery a lot more with my new schedule is great, it is having one unintended consequence. She cries when I leave now. Mostly she was asleep when I left, and even when she did see me leave places, it never seemed to bother her. But in the past week she's started crying when I leave. Because we spend the whole morning together, she sees me leave every day. I hate that.

This is so hard to deal with as a mom, but they do outgrow it eventually. I see it with the mom's when they drop off their kids in my church nursery class. Most of them calm down quickly and can be easily redirected.

I went through something similar with DS#1. He was in daycare from 4 months old, so he never really had issues with being dropped off there. But I went back to school for my master's degree right after he turned one. I was still working full time and taking two to four classes at night and on weekends. I had to get very creative about sneaking out of the house without him seeing me. DH was great at distracting him. Every now and then, DS would "catch" me, and it was a big dramatic scene. I'll never forget watching him wailing and pressing his face against the window as he watched me drive away. My only comfort was that he wouldn't remember it.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

anyone know what will happen to my supply if I start to do two feedings per side before switching?

Do you mean one boob twice? Nothing much will happen as long as you remember to do the same thing on the other side during the next feeding. In general one side might produce a bit less than the other.

My right breast produces about an ounce less than my left because I heavily favored my left when my breasts were torn up. It's not a huge difference and I am not walking around with a uni-boob.

Generally you go till your breasts feel soft and supple again which is anywhere from 8-10 minutes per side.


Gwen ate 10 ounces at daycare yesterday! So that is good her appetite seems to be back. We're still stuck going to the ped today though because I don't want to look like a bad parent and it is better safe than sorry.

Don't think it is an ear infection though.

[gardenergirl]

kjsh - you asked about what you can do for stains on baby clothes. I like All Free and Clear. If it's a really bad stain, like poop or puke I rinse it as much as I can then I put the All detergent directly on the stain. Let it sit for a couple minutes then throw it in the wash. The sooner you can attack the stain the better.

kgb - Awww, yeah, that is so hard, seeing them cry like that. Is DH with Avery after you leave in the morning? Ask him how long it takes her to calm down. Hopefully it's not too long and you'll get some comfort in that. And hopefully she will get used to your new schedule soon. Thanks for the offer to vent while DH is gone! I'll definitely keep that in mind.

[stina72]

Ready-First off, welcome! Like others said, feel free to vent here! Second, I agree with PP in that maybe your doctor could advocate further on your son's behalf. Sometimes all it takes is a little more documentation or in depth reporting on the doctor's part. I hope you get it cleared up soon!

Meg-I'm glad you are getting into your doctors and getting some things figured out. I'm hoping you can get your MRI done soon and hopefully have a diagnosis and treatment plan shortly after that!

kjsh-For stain removers, we like Tech. We used it on our carpet when our dogs were potty training and it lifted everything really well. We also use it on our clothes, as I am very klutzy eater, especially when it comes to things like salsa and white clothing! When I received my wedding dress and tried it on in the store there was a little spot on it and they actually use Tech on all the wedding dresses too to get spots out, so it is pretty versatile. HTH!

[Deleted]

Taz- So glad you got to see your little one.

mutt- Congrats on the first steps! They grow up so quick

Drama - I hope Gwen is ok and it is teething and not something more serious. A is teething and she has very similar symptoms to what you are describing. We just got a rasberry teether and it has been wonderful.

zbear- I did a 4D u/s. I wasn't planning on it, but A hid her lady parts during the gender u/s and I really wanted to know the gender. It was really neat to see and we invited my parents to come along, but I'm not sure that I will get one with the next unless the same happens with the gender u/s.

Ready - I am so sorry you are going through this. Dealing with insurance companies on problems like this is awful. Have you called the insurance company directly? DH has BCBS of AL and had a similar issue (although for nothing as serious as this) and he was able to get the nurse from the Dr.'s office AND an insurance agent on the phone together and worked it out. I hope that you are able to get this resolved soon.

Meg - Good luck with everything. Hopefully you will get answers soon, both for yourself and on the job for DH.

kjsh - I use Shout for spot cleaning and add OxyClean Free to the wash as well. I haven't had a stain not come out since doing so.

[Deleted]

A is also teething. She is so miserable, it is so sad. She is generally a very happy baby, but her mouth bothers her so much at night. She has been waking up a few times a night, which is really unusual for her. Her bottom gums are hard, but she doesn't have the bumps yet so I had held off on giving her Tylenol but gave in last night because she was so miserable and she slept through the night again was so happy this morning. I am ready for those teeth to come through! She also gets a really dry patch of skin by her mouth that looks so painful, I guess from the excess drooling.

She'll be 6 months on Sunday, where has the time gone!

[gardenergirl]

jmrs - for the dry patch of skin by her mouth try Baby Kisses. It's made by Boudreaux's, it comes in a small tube. It works great. I use it on Olivia all the time because she gets that too where she's been sucking on the paci for so long and drooling it dries her skin out. They have Baby Kisses at Babies R Us.

[Deleted]

Thanks gardener! I have to go to BRU on my lunch today so I will try it out.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I've been using Dreft stain remover on Gwen's clothing and it works REALLY good. I use it on blow outs. I spray the stain, let it soak for 5 minutes and then I rinse it in the sink with warm water while scrubbing and adding more spray.

I also found that baby oil can get poop out if it is fresh poop. I just gently rub some into the poop with a cotton ball and wipe it off with a diaper wipe. Got enough of it off that it did not set before I could wash her clothes.

This all works best if I get to the stain ASAP, but I've had it work on stains from daycare as well.

For spit-up I've found the best stain remover is baby wipes, I kid you not. I rub the stain with baby wipes and then throw the clothes in the wash. So far we have not had a single item of clothing permenately stained with spit-up.

Stained permenately with poop yes, I can't always win that one.

[redwagon]

I don't even have a baby yet but I'm pretty sure I'm going to be possessive. I see my MIL take SIL's baby every time and I get defensive on her behalf haha. Thing is, I probably wouldn't care if it was my mother. I love my MIL but something is still protective of "mine." Although maybe once I have a baby and am exhausted, I'll be glad for the respite. But I think it's probably fairly common to be a bit possessive. You had that baby inside you for almost 10 months, so you cherish that connection!

[alphayankee]

I'm only possessive with DS with my step-MIL. She just can't take direction, so I get irritated. I'm not a super overprotective mom, but there were certain things we had to do when DS first came home that she would ignore. She wanted to feed him once, so we told her how he needs to sit up straight while he's eating and needs to be paced, and he gets irritated by being rocked or having his back rubbed (it's a preemie thing). The first thing she does is recline her chair so that she is laying down and almost had his head lower than the rest of his body while she was feeding him. After about 10 seconds, he choked. She couldn't understand why. She's been handling babies for longer than I've been alive, how could she be wrong? DH was great though, he immediately grabbed DS and said "Let me show you." She would have pitched a fit if I'd said it, but she doesn't mess with him. Later, she couldn't understand why he wouldn't calm down when she was rocking him vigorously and rubbing his back. I've kind of resigned myself to the fact that at least she won't want to babysit very often because he cries a lot when he's around her.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I am extremely possesive of Gwen. My MIL will take her and never give her back, it seems. I got overwhelmed at Christmas with DH's family. She was being passed around a ton and I found myself starting to want her back.

DH is getting pretty good at reading my signs and will take Gwen back and give her to me.

I am better than I was. I was REALLY bad with sharing when we first got back from the hospital because of all the crap with the NICU. I got paranoid that if anyone took her they weren't going to bring her back so it was very hard for me to even let DH hold her, let alone other family members.

They were all patient with me, thank god.

[ready4achange]

Gardengirl, muttleynfelix, ladyki, milizard, gusitarenker, kgb18, kjsh, stina72, and jmrs: Thank you very much for the words of encouragement and reading (listening) to me vent.

Gardengirl: I'm a little bit worried about just taking him straight to the ER because our policy says that they only cover 50% for non-emergencies or accidents if the child is taken to the ER. Which 50% is better than nothing. I'm really hoping that the nurse will call me back today and give me an update. I'm going to give it a couple of days before I start really pressing the issue w/ the dr.'s, nurses, and insurance reps.

Milizard: thanks for the forum info. I will go check that out. I feel 99% sure everything is okay and I am freaking out over nothing too. But as a moma we can't help but worry sometimes about the "what if's..." :-) You are right normally with this condition you can see severe deformaties and my son's is not like that. So it probably is nothing, but I would really like for the insurance company to give me the opprotunity to definetly rule this out.

Kjsh- The best stain cleaner I've found is the new Oxy-clean gel stick. Works wonders on things that have even set for a little while. Even those bibs that somehow missed the laundry basket and have set in baby food stains...lol.

Jmrs- Yes gotta love BCBS of AL.... they can be the best insurance at times or the worst at times. And in Alabama they pretty much have a monopoly on everything. I haven't called the insurance company just yet. I'm going to give the nurse another day or so and then call them. The nurse and doctors really seem to be on my side, so hopefully they can work this out soon.

[muttleynfelix]

kjsh - Your supply will probably dip a bit, but if you have a foremilk/hindmilk imbalance, what you are doing is regulating it and feeding twice on one side is exactly what you need to do.

guista - DH and I posessive of DS. We've been known to joking hold DS away from friends and relatives and say no he is our baby. We ended up not having that many visitors when DS was a newborn so it was a little easier to deal with.

[moneymaven]

ready - welcome and you're always able to vent here!

possessiveness - He's not here yet, but I am already possessive. DH keeps calling me mama grizzly. I will not be cool with people yanking DS out of my arms. The one thing that I am not feeling keen on already is people snapping photos of DS and posting them on Facebook. It's one thing for my picture to be out there, but I don't want DS' face to be plastered everywhere. How did you gals deal with that?

[poohbiscit1]

I find that I was never very possessive but that may just be because I have always been a go with the flow type person. Then again I did not have too many visitors while DS was really small and I have a very small set of family and friends.

Ins- to answer the ? in regards to the posting pictures on FB I found that either myself of DH put most of them on there and there the only time friends/family posted pics were from events that we did not have many pics of on our own (christening and B-day party).

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I don't mind the FB photos because they are on family pages that for the most part are private, they aren't on pages that are accessed by the entire world.

[moneymaven]

DH and I both have family members who indiscriminately add people to Facebook (like 900+ friends). People that I don't like seeing my pictures, so my security settings are high for my friends only. It's this group of people that I am not interested in having any glimpse into my life.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

The only thing you can do is ask them not to post pictures of DS. You can't control it unfortunately short of breaking their digtal cameras.

I don't think it is unreasonable to ask that they not post pictures of your DS on a public FB page.

[moneymaven]

You're right, drama.

Anyone heard from eternal?

[redwagon]

I made sure to ask SIL if I could post on FB of my niece, and she asked me not to. As the baby got older she let me put a few up (baby was our flower girl so she was in wedding pix). I'm not sure how I'd feel about other people putting them up... too many wackos out there.

[kristi28]

Jealousy: I didn't have too much trouble with jealousy, but I was pretty sick when baby girl was tiny. I needed people to help out with her, so I couldn't be too upset when they had her all the time. I was actually pretty glad that she had so many people in her life to love her. And when she was upset, no-one could calm her down the way that I could, so I knew I was still "the favorite".

FB: There is exactly one pic of baby girl on FB. I have asked my friends not to post pictures of her there - too many crazies. Everyone has been really supportive and good about this, so I would recommend that you try it if you are concerned.

I saw my doc today, and she gave me the go-ahead to start TTC. She believes that it shouldn't be a problem for me to stay on my meds during pregnancy (I guess they are considered safe). I'm hoping that it doesn't take too long, but at least I plan to have fun trying!

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Yah on getting the green light!

Urgh my wisdom teeth have to be removed according to my dentist. Cost for all four out at once is $600 and the rest is covered by my dental insurance but it would suck dry my entire yearly maximum ($1500).

I am thinking it might be wiser to get the bottom two out NOW since they are the ones that will be starting to cause problems and leave the top two in till I see how much insurance I have left.

They've been in for years and are causing no issues, so I don't see the need to get them out in the next five minutes.

If it isn't one thing it is another. Just got done paying Gwen's hospital bill. At least the baby is paid for!

[regina24601]

Hey, everyone! Sorry I've been MIA for a while now. Mallory actually isn't the reason for it - we've had a guest staying with us nearly every night since she was born, and I always feel bad holing myself up in my room on the computer when someone is visiting, so I've been out of the loop. My sister and her 2 yo daughter are still here, but they went out for a while today (btw...I have learned something from this situation: if I ever go to visit a newborn for 6 days, I am leaving Mallory at home - for the sanity of the new mom. I love my niece, but GOOD HEAVENS!!! It has been the opposite of a restful week for me! She's out of control. But I digress.)

So I am officially, completely twitterpated. (That means I'm in love for anyone who hasn't seen Bambi.) I knew I'd love my little girl, but I couldn't imagine that just looking at her would sometime make me want to cry because I just can't contain my love for her. It's really ridiculous. She's such a good baby! And to answer econ and gardenergirl, her hair is blond, but in a lot of the pictures it appears kind of red. DH has a lot of German ancestry on his side, so if she does turn out blond, it'll be from his side.

Breastfeeding is still going well. I bought a pump the other day because I was having some particularly painful engorgement, but before I got a chance to use it, the pain started backing off, and it seems like I'm starting to regulate my supply better. DH is dying for me to pump a bottle so he can feed her, but I think I'll wait a little bit longer. I'm not concerned about nipple confusion at this point. We gave her a pacifier for the first time yesterday (she had just completely emptied both boobs and was still crying, so we had to try something!). She took it and it calmed her down, but she's still been feeding well since then.

Sleeping at night is a little rough, but not too bad. She wakes up every 2-3 hours to eat, but she goes right back to sleep after eating, so I guess I can't complain too much. My sister said her kids started STTN when they hit 10 pounds, and my little girl is quite a bit shy of that. I've heard when they're little, they just need to eat more often, so I'm not concerned.

Anyway, just wanted to say hey to everyone and let you know how Mall and I are doing! I'm hopelessly behind on things, but I have to say:

gusita - Congrats on your new arrival!!! Happy Birthday, Brett!! What a big boy, and such a cutie! Sorry to hear about your rough labor and delivery, but I'm so glad you have a healthy baby boy that has come out of the experience!!

Sam - Yay for the ultrasound! I understand feeling bummed about not getting pictures, but at least you and DH got to see your little bean kicking around in there. So exciting!!

[kristi28]

Jan 20, 2011 15:26:25 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

If it isn't one thing it is another. Just got done paying Gwen's hospital bill. At least the baby is paid for!

I'm starting to think that the baby is never going to be paid for. It took them 10 months to send me the bill for her delivery! And in that case, I knew what the copay was before she was born. I'm probably going to be getting bills for her PT for years to come.

Whatever you decide, good luck with the teeth. Oh, and this may be TMI, but I recently heard that you don't want them out around that time of the month. I guess it increases your chances of dry socket. Yuck!

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

I knew how much she'd cost too but DANG! lol.

When I paid it off I said "That's it, you are all paid off! They can't come repo you!"

I haven't had a time of the month yet since giving birth. Great, knowing my luck AF will show the week I am going to get the stupid things out.

DH thinks it is a good idea to get only two out then wait. He thinks it'd be too much to get all four out at once.

I fully intend to get all four out by the end of the year if impossible, I just don't know if I wan to exhaust all but $300 of my maximum in the first two months of the year.

I just think that would be a really bad idea.

[kristi28]

Jan 20, 2011 16:02:17 GMT -5 NomoreDramaQ1015 said:

When I paid it off I said "That's it, you are all paid off! They can't come repo you!"

LOL!

I had all four out at once. It was a drag, but I don't think that it would have been much better to just have 2 done. My head swelled up so that it looked like I had tried to eat a pair of baseballs. I couldn't eat anything much for a while and everything I tried to do made it hurt. And I was CRABBY! At least it only lasted for 3-4 days.

I totally understand about the $$ thing, though. This stuff always happens at the worst possible time. Maybe you could wait a while on all of them?

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

Well it's more the insurance because I have a $1500 YEARLY maximum. Getting all four out at once right now would eat up all but $300. Which means any problems or any other work I need done beyond that $300 is going to have to be 100% OOP for the rest of the year.

I suppose it is not bad if nothing comes up during my periodontal appointment. I suppose I should wait till I have my check-up and consult before making any final decisions.