thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on May 19, 2011 16:22:11 GMT -5
So - my nieces and nephews are all entering the world, and my sister said that she called some things about her kids right on the nose because of how the kids acted as kids.
My nieces are both really good with money - work hard, save, no frivolous spending, but very thoughtful about what they really want, etc. My nephew is more "in the moment" with his money. Although he is not irresponsible, he just isn't as frugal.
My daughter (2nd grade) came home from school and said they were each given $5 (fake) to go and spend in the store. She only spend $3, because she only liked the 2 things she got, but a couple of her friends spent all $5. I told her I was proud of her for only buying what she actually wanted and not picking up any ol' crap just because.
So, is my daughter going to grow up with a propensity to be responsible and thoughtful with her money?
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on May 19, 2011 16:24:23 GMT -5
I would say it depends on how expensive her tastes turn out to be...
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azphx1972
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Post by azphx1972 on May 19, 2011 18:07:39 GMT -5
Interesting topic. Do parents really think about the values they're teaching their children? I came across this comment on an Amazon Review the other day for a book I'm currently reading ("Stop Acting Rich: ...And Start Living Like A Real Millionaire"), and it gave me a lot of food for thought: www.amazon.com/review/R1YCPW3CUY2F8M/ref=cm_cr_rev_detmd_pl?ie=UTF8&cdForum=FxJ7AQXD7JQJAT&cdMsgNo=4&cdPage=1&asin=0470482559&store=books&cdSort=oldest&cdThread=Tx38OJKEMXCXBCK&cdMsgID=Mx3NIINEGQ1MBQH#Mx3NIINEGQ1MBQHHere's an interesting topic for the kind of statistical surveys that Stanley has in this book: If you showed women pictures of men with nice cars and Brooks Brothers suits, along with pictures of their nice houses and the upscale stores where they shop, and then showed pictures of the millionaire next door, the house he lives in, the car he drives, the stores he shops in, etc., and asked the women which man was more desirable as a mate, what would they say?
Until we start raising our daughters to consciously understand these issues, there is a powerful motivation for many men to Act Rich.
Note: I am happily married and do not overspend on cars and clothes. I just want to point out that this problem will not be solved by having people in their forties and fifties (like myself) read these books and nod in agreement. If our children, ESPECIALLY our female children, do not figure this stuff out at a much earlier age, then the present patterns will continue.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on May 19, 2011 21:25:21 GMT -5
Wasting, I think your daughter will turn out A-OK with money I was worried about my little sister for a while... from 10-14 or so she had VERY expensive tastes... but as we later learned, she only liked to spend other peoples' money Now she is 20 and so frugal she'd put some of the WIR coupon queens to shame... I'm still not convinced she doesn't lurk on here somewhere.
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alabamagal
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Post by alabamagal on May 20, 2011 8:55:50 GMT -5
We try our best to instill our values in our kids about money. Overall I think my 3 are doing pretty well. They definitely have different personalities as far as spending, though. My youngest is the worst about spending, but he is getting better. We used to joke that he would never let any money burn a hole in his pocket. He got money (gifts, allowances, etc.) and he spent it. He is now working part time (he is 16 now) and he is better about saving some money. He pays some money toward his car expenses, and is saving for his senior trip, and greatly reduced the amount he spends on video games.
My 18 year old just finished his first year in college. Toward the middle of last semester he was running pretty low on money, and he called and told me he really wanted to start dressing "nicer". This meant moving away from jeans flip-flops and t-shirts to nicer khaki pants and collared shirts. I was actually proud of him for this and told him I could give him some money and gave him some ideas of where he could get some clothes at pretty reasonable prices. On his own, he actually found his way to Goodwill or Salvation Army and found him some "really nice" shirts for $2. He now has a good summer job to earn some money for his next school year. I am proud of him for how he doesn't ask for everything and is very careful with is money.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on May 20, 2011 9:00:52 GMT -5
So, is my daughter going to grow up with a propensity to be responsible and thoughtful with her moneyNope, if she was she would have taken that $5 and invested it and recieved 12.5% return on it and eventually been able to live on $14k a year while raising six children and extreme couponing in her spare time.
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kiskis
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Post by kiskis on May 20, 2011 9:28:56 GMT -5
I was worried about my little sister for a while... from 10-14 or so she had VERY expensive tastes... but as we later learned, she only liked to spend other peoples' money Now she is 20 and so frugal she'd put some of the WIR coupon queens to shame... LOL, that was totally me! (No, I'm not your little sis.) Sometimes, my family still can't believe how I am now. Heck, even DH is sometimes shocked because of how I lived in college. I no longer eat out, I don't care about cars or tech gadgets anymore, don't care to travel too much (pain with young kids), but I still like expensive clothes. However, I am very careful about only buying basics that I wear a lot. With accessories and trend items, I am a bargain shopper like no other. My cousin, on the other hand, was so cheap as a kid. He used to take out his batteries from his gameboy even during five minutes of un-use and run them to the refrigerator. Now, he is a complete financial failure, but he's probably just going through an early-20s crisis. So, my answer is that people can change a lot. Childhood behavior is no guarantee of adult behavior, however, financial awareness at any age can't hurt.
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sil
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Post by sil on May 20, 2011 10:37:13 GMT -5
As a kid, my sister was the type who would eat one piece of Halloween candy a day and make the bowl last until Christmas. She grew up to be an accountant. Even as a teenager she always wanted high-quality clothing vs the trendy stuff. My sister never needs to read this message board because this budgeting stuff comes naturally to her. Although it's fortunate that she married someone who's a bit of a risk taker to push her towards a less conservative investment strategy.
As for me, I'm lazy and a procrastinator. As a kid, I was known as the "underachiever" because I was a good test-taker. When I grew up, I just kept going to school because I was procrastinating on growing up. I'm making good money now, though most of the people I graduated with make far more. Still, my primary focus is still all about working less. All my savings and bill pay is on auto pilot and I only use Target Date investment funds....I'm way too lazy to do anything else
So in my sample study of 2 people, our personalities as kids were very strong indicators of our adult attitudes towards money.
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