Unusual Obituary Condolence Comment(s)

[Tennesseer]

When reading on-line obituararies and condolence comments left have you ever come across any that are unusual?

As some of you know, my older brother committed suicide this past January. The day after his services last month, my brother's oldest comments printed out his obituary and condolence comments. The one below was a bit unusual.

Dearest Joe, it saddens me to say farewell. On January 10,1971 we shared an unbearable loss. A love never to nurture. And now 52 years to the day you took journey to Heaven for peaceful rest and comfort. Welcomed with open loving arms from a Little Angel. I´m heart broken. You were a sweet gentle soul so many wish they could be. A true friend .
My condolences to your daughters and their families.

You are cherished.
Karen

When my niece saw the comments, she replied on the condolences section the following:

Karen,
If you happen to return to this page and see this, could you please reach out to me? I would appreciate it so much.
Thank you,
His daughter, Susan
615-555-5555

Karen called my niece and explained she miscarried at the beginning of her second trimester. She said she dated my brother during their high school years (though she went to a different high school) and while he went to college. During high school and first years of college my brother had a steady girlfriend and her name sure wasn't Karen.

We his family and all his lifelong friends have no idea who she is and my brother never spoke of her or the alleged events.

What say you-is/was the condolence like the one offered by Karen appropriate for family and friends? I laugh about her comments because she's writing it as if my deceased brother can read her comments. Her condolences left little to no comfort for his family and friends.

And we are still not sure if her story is legit as she would not offer her last name to my niece and hid her phone number when she called her. We don't expect to hear from Karen again. That's for sure.

[busymom]

Ouch, so sorry about this situation Tennesseer .


The only condolence I've ever seen personally that was similar was a well-known man in our community who got an anonymous post that said good-bye to their "dad".  Apparently he had another child that no one knew about.  Ouch!

[Tennesseer]

Mar 11, 2023 17:32:49 GMT -5 busymom said:

Ouch, so sorry about this situation Tennesseer .


The only condolence I've ever seen personally that was similar was a well-known man in our community who got an anonymous post that said good-bye to their "dad".  Apparently he had another child that no one knew about.  Ouch!

Yea. One just not drop bombs like that in print.

[toomuchreality]

I'm sorry Tennesseer.

My guess is that Karen didn't write her comments, to comfort the family, or friends. That somehow, for some reason, her comments comforted, or validated something in her life.

Maybe she had good intentions, but they didn't come across very well. More of a self serving thing. Odd.

I said this in another post today- people are strange.

Hugs

[Tennesseer]

Mar 11, 2023 18:48:21 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

I'm sorry Tennesseer.

My guess is that Karen didn't write her comments, to comfort the family, or friends. That somehow, for some reason, her comments comforted, or validated something in her life.

Maybe she had good intentions, but they didn't come across very well. More of a self serving thing. Odd.

I said this in another post today- people are strange.

Hugs

That's kind of what I thought. She was unloading her issues on unknown people.

[swamp]

Sounds like she’s crazy. 

[steph08]

Sounds like a troll who goes through obituaries, pulls out the details, makes up a background story where she's close enough but not quite (neighboring school, no last name, etc), just to either torture families or get attention for five minutes.

I hope you and your brother's family weren't too upset by it.

[NastyWoman]

Mar 11, 2023 21:31:11 GMT -5 steph08 said:

Sounds like a troll who goes through obituaries, pulls out the details, makes up a background story where she's close enough but not quite (neighboring school, no last name, etc), just to either torture families or get attention for five minutes.

I hope you and your brother's family weren't too upset by it.

  I think she is similar to those creeps who troll obituaries to see when it is the best time to rob the residence of a deceased  person. But rather than steal physical goods she enjoys trashing a dead person's reputation. 

[Tennesseer]

Mar 11, 2023 21:31:11 GMT -5 steph08 said:

Sounds like a troll who goes through obituaries, pulls out the details, makes up a background story where she's close enough but not quite (neighboring school, no last name, etc), just to either torture families or get attention for five minutes.

I hope you and your brother's family weren't too upset by it.

If our parents were still alive they would have been upset. But for the rest of the family, including my brother's daughters, it actually added a bit of levity to an otherwise sad and somber event.

And we still are not sure she's the real deal as you note in your first paragraph. She'll at least make a fun future family anecdotal story.

[Opti]

Mar 12, 2023 0:15:58 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Mar 11, 2023 21:31:11 GMT -5 steph08 said:

Sounds like a troll who goes through obituaries, pulls out the details, makes up a background story where she's close enough but not quite (neighboring school, no last name, etc), just to either torture families or get attention for five minutes.

I hope you and your brother's family weren't too upset by it.

If our parents were still alive they would have been upset. But for the rest of the family, including my brother's daughters, it actually added a bit of levity to an otherwise sad and somber event.

And we still are not sure she's the real deal as you note in your first paragraph. She'll at least make a fun future family anecdotal story.

I would assume she's an attention seeking liar given she wouldn't reveal her last name and her number. What she "revealed" has no value except to get his loved ones to doubt who he was. 

[Tennesseer]

Mar 12, 2023 9:04:18 GMT -5 Opti said:

Mar 12, 2023 0:15:58 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

If our parents were still alive they would have been upset. But for the rest of the family, including my brother's daughters, it actually added a bit of levity to an otherwise sad and somber event.

And we still are not sure she's the real deal as you note in your first paragraph. She'll at least make a fun future family anecdotal story.

I would assume she's an attention seeking liar given she wouldn't reveal her last name and her number. What she "revealed" has no value except to get his loved ones to doubt who he was. 

Thanks.

As my brother is no longer available to reply to Karen's claim, we take her life story with a grain of salt.

[Rukh O'Rorke]

Mar 11, 2023 19:19:17 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

Mar 11, 2023 18:48:21 GMT -5 toomuchreality said:

I'm sorry Tennesseer .

My guess is that Karen didn't write her comments, to comfort the family, or friends. That somehow, for some reason, her comments comforted, or validated something in her life.

Maybe she had good intentions, but they didn't come across very well. More of a self serving thing. Odd.

I said this in another post today- people are strange.

Hugs

That's kind of what I thought. She was unloading her issues on unknown people.

There are so many options!

she could be somewhat delusional. Maybe a brief fling rather than a relationship, maybe an unrequited crush and she is angie-babying an alternate reality, maybe a deliberate act of cruelty?


she could also have the wrong person! How common is your brother's name?

[Rukh O'Rorke]

blocking the number is suspicious though! I go for wacko!

[toomuchreality]

Mar 12, 2023 17:03:51 GMT -5 Rukh O'Rorke said:

Mar 11, 2023 19:19:17 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

That's kind of what I thought. She was unloading her issues on unknown people.

There are so many options!

she could be somewhat delusional. Maybe a brief fling rather than a relationship, maybe an unrequited crush and she is angie-babying an alternate reality, maybe a deliberate act of cruelty?


she could also have the wrong person! How common is your brother's name?

Angie Baby. I wish I would have thought of that!

[Tennesseer]

Mar 12, 2023 17:03:51 GMT -5 Rukh O'Rorke said:

Mar 11, 2023 19:19:17 GMT -5 Tennesseer said:

That's kind of what I thought. She was unloading her issues on unknown people.

There are so many options!

she could be somewhat delusional. Maybe a brief fling rather than a relationship, maybe an unrequited crush and she is angie-babying an alternate reality, maybe a deliberate act of cruelty?


she could also have the wrong person! How common is your brother's name?

Semi-common last name in the Trois-Rivières' area of Quebec. Our ancestors from there migrated to Massachusetts late 1800s. Not common in the Mass. city we grew up in but semi common in western Maine (more immigrants from quebec).

During his teens, my brother was a member of a locally popular garage band in the '60s. She might have known him from back then.

We won't hear from her again.

[NomoreDramaQ1015]

That is so odd.  I wouldn't give her the time of day because it sounds like a scam.   If it is not that then it is someone who was looking for absolution for her own sins at the expense of someone's death which is unbelievably tacky.   Go talk to your priest about it don't burden the family members who if they did not personally contact you upon his death they clearly know nothing about your existence. 

Death brings so much weird shit out of the woodwork.  I was just flabbergasted at the crap people felt it was appropriate to share and say to my face upon my mother's death.   What happened to respect for the dead? 

[mcsangel2]

I would have assumed she is indeed the girlfriend your brother had in HS and college, and she's trying to disguise her identity by claiming a different first name and high school. It may be that she had difficulty getting closure (perhaps she had not a miscarriage, but an abortion which would have been illegal at the time) and that leaving a message was a way for her to feel connected to your brother again. But she also didn't want to take a chance that someone who knows her would see the message and raise problems in her current life.

[Tennesseer]

Mar 13, 2023 15:25:48 GMT -5 mcsangel2 said:

I would have assumed she is indeed the girlfriend your brother had in HS and college, and she's trying to disguise her identity by claiming a different first name and high school. It may be that she had difficulty getting closure (perhaps she had not a miscarriage, but an abortion which would have been illegal at the time) and that leaving a message was a way for her to feel connected to your brother again. But she also didn't want to take a chance that someone who knows her would see the message and raise problems in her current life.

That could be a possibility. But in my brother's case, his high school and college girlfriend died ten years ago. My brother even attended her wake/visitation.