My $0.05 (because we don't have pennies anymore):
1) Comedians already pay a price when they tell a tasteless or bad joke. They lose the audience which they may or may not get back during their set. If it's offensive enough, they pay a long term price because some of their audience stops going to their shows and movies, they don't get offered Netflix specials, etc. It seemed to me that the audience was largely reacting negatively to the joke. With or without the slap, it might have been enough to get the Academy to not ask Chris Rock back because he used an offensive joke not vetted in rehearsal.
2) I didn't see this live and there have been issues with clips being used out of order and claimed reaction photos being used that were actually reactions to other events during the night. Did Will Smith actually laugh at the GI Jane joke or was the clip from a joke earlier in the show when someone called up all the single men and (to paraphrase) told Will Smith because of his circumstances, he counted? Because Jada Pinkett Smith, to me, definitely had an "Fuck you, asshole" glare at her husband.
3) Jada Pinkett Smith has never struck me as the sort of person who needs a partner to defend her from words. It seems to me that she's had a number of back and forths with people over the years and she gave as good as she got. Will Smith just reminded me of all of times DH stepped in when he didn't need to and, instead of me putting the person in their place and making them feel bad, it became all about what an asshole DH is.
4) Based on what I've run across so far, Chris Rock and Jada Pinkett Smith handled this professional. Will Smith, not at all.
5) A slap may be more disrespectful then a punch but it is also less likely to cause injury. There is also the issue of the size difference between the 2 men and the fact that Will Smith has had training as a boxer. How tough does he look punching someone smaller who isn't expecting it?
6) Will Smith should have been ejected like any other Joe that acts out but he wasn't. He's too big a draw to kick out right away. If he had thrown a punch instead of a slap, it would have been harder to justify letting him stay.
7) I see no upside for either party so I don't believe this was a set up. Chris Rock may or may not ever make another joke at Will Smith or Jada Pinkett Smith's expense again but there are currently a large number of other people letting them rip. If his plan was to force people to show his wife respect, it backfired.
8) Will Smith won his award. It shouldn't be taken away from him. In my opinion, this shouldn't stop him from being nominated or winning in the future. I do think he should be barred from attending award shows or, at the least the Academy Awards for a season or more. Presenters, whether comedians or not, poke fun at attendies all of the time and often the jokes are mean spirited. It maybe shouldn't be, but it is one of the job conditions. Sit on your hands until later or stay home.