nidena
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Post by nidena on Sept 13, 2021 6:51:48 GMT -5
Put up with it one day at a time. You know you can leave at any time but every day gets you one stop closer to that goal.
At 17 years in the military, I started my 36 month countdown to 20 years. In that last year, it was 364 and a wakeup...363 and a wakeup. That's often how we count deployments, too: "...and a wakeup."
Don't count the months. Count the days because that will change with each one that passes.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 13, 2021 15:01:44 GMT -5
If you were to give notice right now, would they make promises in order to keep you? It's risky, as it's only a bell that can be rung once. The reason I am unhappy is because they don't seem to have much confidence in me. Apparently, I did not do my best work during Covid, doing two jobs with one being brand new (and a difficult GM). I am not sure they would fight for me. If they did, I would at least feel like my warm body brought them some comfort.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Sept 15, 2021 9:17:58 GMT -5
The reason I am unhappy is because they don't seem to have much confidence in me. Apparently, I did not do my best work during Covid, doing two jobs with one being brand new (and a difficult GM). I am not sure they would fight for me. If they did, I would at least feel like my warm body brought them some comfort. Is it the culture at your workplace to "fight" for people. At my job, it's totally not anymore. And we're talking about an environment where I'm comfortable with (some) of my coworkers being involved in my personal life. One of the folks I work with is my back up person to come to my cancer appointments with me in case my husband can't. Another one (retired) is godparent to one of my kids. Do you have an HR?
Are you doing any training, etc for the second job? (I'm assuming it's a separate role, set of tasks, and that they aren't actually having you work 80 hours a week doing two separate jobs..). What were the performance metrics during covid? How did you not meet them? Is this all documented or made up in leadership's head? I've forgotten, is your plan to retire if you quit, or will you look for other work? If you think you might try to find another job, I'd at least start covering your ass. Unless you can get away without using someone at your current job as a reference. But, honestly, I've never seen that on job ads (that a reference from a current job isn't needed).
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movingforward
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Post by movingforward on Sept 15, 2021 10:46:31 GMT -5
If you were to give notice right now, would they make promises in order to keep you? It's risky, as it's only a bell that can be rung once. The reason I am unhappy is because they don't seem to have much confidence in me. Apparently, I did not do my best work during Covid, doing two jobs with one being brand new (and a difficult GM). I am not sure they would fight for me. If they did, I would at least feel like my warm body brought them some comfort. Are you still working from home or back in the office? I know people don't like to hear this, but working from home full time can have some disadvantages. One thing is it is very easy to lose touch with people and for your team to lose confidence in someone. It also makes it easy for manager's to dismiss your worth because you aren't around. I myself have filtered work to others that I feel are more "reliable" because they are actually here 2-3 days a week. I honestly don't have as much confidence in those that haven't shown their face in the office the last year and half. It's really hard with hybrid staff meetings too because those of us that are here pretty much forget about the couple of people on zoom...we start talking and making decisions and forget they are even there.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Sept 15, 2021 11:15:04 GMT -5
I would try to get another job. Definitely not quit. Sometimes job hunts can take a while, maybe even the 5 months that you need to lapse before the bonus. You could get an offer for more money. Maybe they would even give you a sign on bonus to start if you mention your current bonus payout and timing. I vote for this option. If you get an offer early you can see if they would do a hiring bonus to compensate, delay your start date so you can still collect, or leverage the offer for a counter at your current job. (I know the 3rd option isn't for every job and or industry, but its very common in mine). Even if you don't find something quickly, hopefully taking action to get out of there can build back some of your confidence and make staying more bearable.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 15, 2021 21:26:02 GMT -5
After a soul crushing Monday and Tuesday, today was a good day. My boss sat in with me on some meetings where we have to do a bunch of stuff for corporate. He is the keeper of those deliverables, but has never had to actually complete them. He seemed to have opened his eyes to how hard they are. After we worked for a while I just assigned him one of the GM's to finish while I worked with the other one. Now that he has walked in my shoes, I am hoping he saw my value. He even told me to stop beating myself up about the huge fuck-up that started this whole downward spiral.
Even if my standing is still questionable,, I got through the hardest part. I am feeling quite relieved just to have it all done. We are presenting tomorrow - we will see if that makes me look better or worse.
I am thinking of going to a career coach/counselor. I really want to change gears (in 4.5 years) but I don't have any ideas on what I want to do. Maybe there is some value to a professional walking me through change.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Sept 15, 2021 21:48:13 GMT -5
Please share if you do! I need to set up my 2nd career.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 16, 2021 20:03:37 GMT -5
The high from yesterday has worn off - but my boss is being really, really nice to me. I think I am safe from being fired.
I still might go see a career counselor. I don't want to work in this field forever.
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on Sept 16, 2021 21:23:09 GMT -5
The high from yesterday has worn off - but my boss is being really, really nice to me. I think I am safe from being fired. I still might go see a career counselor. I don't want to work in this field forever. There are books that walk you through thinking what you might like to do and what your skill set fits. That might be a start if you aren't ready for a professional yet
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 16, 2021 23:36:19 GMT -5
The high from yesterday has worn off - but my boss is being really, really nice to me. I think I am safe from being fired. I still might go see a career counselor. I don't want to work in this field forever. There are books that walk you through thinking what you might like to do and what your skill set fits. That might be a start if you aren't ready for a professional yet Any that you recommend?
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on Sept 17, 2021 8:56:03 GMT -5
There are books that walk you through thinking what you might like to do and what your skill set fits. That might be a start if you aren't ready for a professional yet Any that you recommend? I read Dr Phil's Life Strategies years ago but I'm sure there are better ones out there.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 21, 2021 19:57:40 GMT -5
So, I am still super stressed about my job, but I don't think I am going to be fired. Something super shitty happened today, and it makes my life very, very difficult - but it was someone else's screw up. Maybe they will direct their ire that direction.
I invite you all to join me and make this a "bitch about your job" thread.
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Knee Deep in Water Chloe
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Post by Knee Deep in Water Chloe on Sept 21, 2021 21:20:24 GMT -5
Today's and the last few years frustration is that I work for my husband. So, when my boss does something I don't like, I get mad at my husband. It happened again today. But I didn't get mad until I got home. And that's bad and not fair. But I can't get another job for at least a year but probably two. And that's assuming I can get another job since I've been working for my husband for seven years.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 21, 2021 22:54:21 GMT -5
Today's and the last few years frustration is that I work for my husband. So, when my boss does something I don't like, I get mad at my husband. It happened again today. But I didn't get mad until I got home. And that's bad and not fair. But I can't get another job for at least a year but probably two. And that's assuming I can get another job since I've been working for my husband for seven years. Very early in our marriage I realized I did not want to work for, with or near my husband. Not only do I not want to be "work mad" at him, but also because when something happens at work, I want to tell my husband and have him be 100% on my side - even if I am wrong. I need back-up.
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on Sept 22, 2021 9:17:25 GMT -5
So, I am still super stressed about my job, but I don't think I am going to be fired. Something super shitty happened today, and it makes my life very, very difficult - but it was someone else's screw up. Maybe they will direct their ire that direction. I invite you all to join me and make this a "bitch about your job" thread. I could have used this in my last few jobs. I had such toxic bosses! I stayed way too long at the first one because of my insecurity that I could get another job that paid as well. They did a restructuring (read clean out the top salaries in the org) and I was second from the top. At the time I was devastated. But it put me on a path to end up in my current job that pays just as well, is WFH which I LOVE! and has a proper HR department so the bosses can't get away with the BS my last 2 bosses pulled.
At my last job the boss felt entitled to call me at 7 am on a Saturday morning to ask me to go in to cover her shift for her because she wanted to go skiing with friends. And was annoyed when I didn't answer the phone! For months after I left the org she would call me to do something for her and if I didn't respond within 15 mins she would be sending texts and emails. Much of the stuff she was asking me to do was a conflict of interest with my current job!!! I told her straight up I'm not putting this job in jeopardy for you and you've never done anything to make me trust you to have my back if I did help you on the down low.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Sept 22, 2021 10:27:18 GMT -5
So, I am still super stressed about my job, but I don't think I am going to be fired. Something super shitty happened today, and it makes my life very, very difficult - but it was someone else's screw up. Maybe they will direct their ire that direction. I invite you all to join me and make this a "bitch about your job" thread. I could have used this in my last few jobs. I had such toxic bosses! I stayed way too long at the first one because of my insecurity that I could get another job that paid as well. They did a restructuring (read clean out the top salaries in the org) and I was second from the top. At the time I was devastated. But it put me on a path to end up in my current job that pays just as well, is WFH which I LOVE! and has a proper HR department so the bosses can't get away with the BS my last 2 bosses pulled.
At my last job the boss felt entitled to call me at 7 am on a Saturday morning to ask me to go in to cover her shift for her because she wanted to go skiing with friends. And was annoyed when I didn't answer the phone! For months after I left the org she would call me to do something for her and if I didn't respond within 15 mins she would be sending texts and emails. Much of the stuff she was asking me to do was a conflict of interest with my current job!!! I told her straight up I'm not putting this job in jeopardy for you and you've never done anything to make me trust you to have my back if I did help you on the down low.
Holy shitballs - that is terrible!
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Sept 23, 2021 9:49:02 GMT -5
Today's and the last few years frustration is that I work for my husband. So, when my boss does something I don't like, I get mad at my husband. It happened again today. But I didn't get mad until I got home. And that's bad and not fair. But I can't get another job for at least a year but probably two. And that's assuming I can get another job since I've been working for my husband for seven years. I thought you worked in education? How is this even allowed?
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Sept 24, 2021 9:08:05 GMT -5
Every day I wake up and get ready for work I think about quitting. Three years six months before I can get medical coverage and I can quit.
Our company got bought out by a big international company. For a while they left us alone, but in the last few years they decided all their subsidiaries have to become borg clones, so we have to move to all new software programs that some distant person picked. We have no input on how they are configured, we just have to figure out how to make them work for us. Plus this company is crazy with silos. Each part of the business- manufacturing, finance, HR, quality- send their own auditors out to visit us and they leave us reams of audit findings we are obligated to fix. Often the different audits conflict with each other, but we’re supposed to comply with both. We have to comply with regulations that aren’t American regulations- The auditors don’t care. They just want all sites complying with all the same rules, regardless of cost.
And my boss is nice enough but he’s the site heads golden child. Promoted based on his positive energy and can do attitude, but he never worked in this field before and rather than learn how to do it he just delegates everything to me, then takes my reports and puts his name on them. Three years six months.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 8, 2021 11:25:22 GMT -5
Today, my mantra...
Three and a half months. Three and a half months. Three and a half months.
I need the ruby slippers to make it happen.
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laterbloomer
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Post by laterbloomer on Oct 8, 2021 12:29:17 GMT -5
Today, my mantra... Three and a half months. Three and a half months. Three and a half months. I need the ruby slippers to make it happen. That really sucks!
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Oct 8, 2021 19:38:11 GMT -5
Today, my mantra... Three and a half months. Three and a half months. Three and a half months. I need the ruby slippers to make it happen. Sorry! What happens in 3.5 months?
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minnesotapaintlady
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Post by minnesotapaintlady on Oct 8, 2021 20:53:44 GMT -5
Today, my mantra... Three and a half months. Three and a half months. Three and a half months. I need the ruby slippers to make it happen. Sorry! What happens in 3.5 months? She gets her bonus and walks out!
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 8, 2021 21:54:34 GMT -5
Sorry! What happens in 3.5 months? She gets her bonus and walks out! Or more likely, things calm down around Christmas, my elnew employee is all trained and I get lulled into calmness, and then I get my bonus and I think that this isn't so bad - money is good, I will stay. 👾
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Oct 9, 2021 12:47:46 GMT -5
She gets her bonus and walks out! Or more likely, things calm down around Christmas, my elnew employee is all trained and I get lulled into calmness, and then I get my bonus and I think that this isn't so bad - money is good, I will stay. 👾 We're in the same boat! Just keep stringing it along from one lull to another. If the stock market were to do 15-20% yearly increase in next two-3 years - I could retire now! But who know's which way it will go, so slogging on.....
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Oct 13, 2021 19:11:53 GMT -5
Today - I am not so sure I can make it
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Rukh O'Rorke
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Post by Rukh O'Rorke on Oct 13, 2021 19:14:08 GMT -5
Today - I am not so sure I can make it have a few and chill. Only 2 more days left this week.
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