This time of day

[Deleted]

around suppertime in the South until about 7 or so, is the time I get really lonely. Are there other singletons/widows/widowers out there who have noticed the same thing? Maybe not at the same time of day, but a particular time of day when the aloneness is hard to bear?

[Deleted]

Definitely late afternoon. I'm able to get out more than you and I try to time things so that I'm out part of the afternoon and have a late lunch to shorten the time between lunch and dinner. After dinner I head into the bedroom early and watch Netflix for awhile, then read and turn out the light around 10. So far I've been VERY good about not turning on the TV till after dinner.

OTOH, I spend way to much time on Internet boards!

[jerseygirl]

I’ve always been gloomy in the early evening at this time of year when the darkness settles in so early in the evening - Curses on end of DST!!!

[sesfw]

I was working full time when my Bill died so coming home to an empty house was a smack in the face.  I would leave the radio on so the silence wouldn't be so deafening but it was still hard.  Jessie kitty grieved the loss also and she would fight with the kitty in the mirror to protect me.

I slept on Bill's side of bed and sat in his chair.  I couldn't stand to see them empty.

Tough road, but you do get through it.  One stinkin lousy day at a time.

[Blonde Granny]

My times are not according to the time of day, it's more when something happens....an event, something special, and then there is no one to share it with. Dec. 1st it will be 5 years since my DH passed away.

As for getting through it: a friend who has been a widow for almost 30 years once told me: You never get over it, it just changes. I'm still waiting for the changes to happen.

[Deleted]

Your friend is right, Blonde Granny. We get used to it but not over it. It changes.

[Opti]

Single, divorced by choice. Always thought I'd be remarried by now, but things went wonky around 2000 and #2 did not materialize. I am lonely most of the time I'm not at work even though I do have a couple creatures. As a poor underfunded single woman I really don't know how to get dates. I'm going to I guess flatly ask out a sigifincantly younger man since I believe I have nowhere to go for Thanksgiving. And definitely big zero for Christmas & New Years. I pretty much hate this time of year as an underfunded 60 yr old single woman whose birth family lives states away from me. It sucks less after Easter, but its just a reminder its much harder to get a man in my life that I want than a pet. (As my rescue skinny pig starts audibly squeaking. Oh joy, what is he complaining about or wanting now?)

[sesfw]

Opt4 ......... is there a community center or senior center in your area?

Someone there could use a bit of company during this holiday season.  Maybe ask at a local church of your choice.

Just a thought to get you through this lonely time of year.  

[Deleted]

Opti Churches...even if you're not a particularly church-y kind of person, check out the Unitarian or Unitarian Universalist congregations in your area. Their members are intelligent and well-educated people who are very welcoming and inclusive.

I think you'd meet folks of like mind. What've you got to lose?

[empress of self-improvement]

All the time is a gloomy time of day for me. I have never ever lived on my own before and it kinda sucks. DH may have been a grump but at least he was there. I miss him in the morning, i miss him during the day when I keep looking at my phone for texts, i miss him when i go home to the quiet house and i miss him when i go to bed. God this sucks.

[Deleted]

empress of self-improvement

[Opti]

Nov 13, 2020 12:25:12 GMT -5 @missrigby said:

Opti Churches...even if you're not a particularly church-y kind of person, check out the Unitarian or Unitarian Universalist congregations in your area. Their members are intelligent and well-educated people who are very welcoming and inclusive.

I think you'd meet folks of like mind. What've you got to lose?

Actually I was starting to be in the process of joining a local Unitarian Universalist church. Like most cool non denominational churches though, the average male my age is there with a SO or spouse. Years ago I and another church friend almost informally fought over some new blood. Gorgeous. IMO bi, but he identifies and lives as a gay man. We were close buds for awhile, but I no longer commute up there for church and for now I prefer this local Unitarian church.

They even started a monthly events thing, mostly peeps my age or older, but usually $$ to go somewhere.  [img]https://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff155/JiminiChristmas/ymamsmiles/sad.png[/img]   I don't really have a travel budget and unfortunately since I am hoarding stuff I can't afford to replace, my one bdrm apt is cluttered and very ummm engineery. I've only let a few people in because of that. I probably should invite G, but I know I will be crushed if his eyes go OMG.
Since I think he's in the start of the Millenials he might focus on all my cool stuff instead of the clutter, but IDK. I keep my trunk less cluttered after learning more about how mechanics view your car when you bring it in. Also, less stuff, makes it easier for them to take apart the trunk or access wiring. I was horrified the last time it was towed in without me, because it unexpected zotted out and I had to walk about two miles to home to call for help AND let work know. (Work is about 3 miles away, but on a tricky highway with bad visibility and no sidewalks.

[Opti]

Oh Miss Rigby, services are still virtual here both this church and my former non denom one. Neither are large so social distancing would be tough. I was planning to sing in their choir too. 

The local Lutheran church might be big enough to do expanded services, but they really aren't my style. I went for an Easter service myself for a Christian play presentation. Did not enjoy it as much as when I attended another small church, Lutheran, near where my car goes for service. I checked it out one Christmas, because it is the oldest Lutheran church in NJ. Historic stuff often calls my name.

[andi9899]

I don't usually eat dinner until about 10pm because I'm always busy. By the time I get off work and go to the gym (virtual for now) it's usually about 8pm. Then I take a shower and cook. It's usually about 10 by the time dinner is done.

[Opti]

Nov 13, 2020 14:31:31 GMT -5 andi9899 said:

I don't usually eat dinner until about 10pm because I'm always busy. By the time I get off work and go to the gym (virtual for now) it's usually about 8pm. Then I take a shower and cook. It's usually about 10 by the time dinner is done.

When do you get up for work days?